Alex Riley - Dirty Boss. A Second Chance Romance

Dirty Boss A Second Chance Romance



Dirty Boss: A Second Chance Romance

Alex Riley Copyright © 2016 All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means without the prior permission in writing of the publisher. This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidental.



Emily is a straight laced college girl whose life experiences have taught her to always plays it safe so as not to get hurt. She is inexperienced with men, shying away from experience in favour of her college studies. That is until she meets super hot Ryan, a recent graduate and dirty boss, who turns her world upside down in an explosive one night stand that will change her life forever. The next day Ryan is gone but Emily’s eyes are forever opened, that night making her feel like a new adult and marks the start of her transformation into a successful career woman and the boss of her own company. All the while though, she once again longs to feel his warm embrace and the way he made her feel down there. She has all but given up when a tragedy four years later provides the two young adults with an opportune meeting and a second chance at romance. If only Ryan would believe in second chances ...



Table of Contents Emily One Two Three Ryan Four Reunion Five six seven

Emily

ONE

April, 2016 Emily Wilson read the mail in her inbox over and over again. Her business really was going to take her to Athens, Georgia, she thought with a whimsical smile. More than that, it was going to be taking her on a roller coaster ride down memory lane. Not that she had ever forgotten; not for a single day. The International Fashion Show was always the most anticipated event of the year for the fashion industry and this year ’s event was taking her to Athens to represent her fashion line, ‘Head Turners’. “Why Georgia of all places? Why not Egypt, Switzerland or Haiti? Why Athens?” she muttered out loud even though she was the only one in her room. Fate really had a way of going about its business, Emily thought with an unbelievable shake of her head. For Emily, it had all started in Athens, Northeast Georgia. The name she had made for herself and the fame she had gathered was birthed in Athens on that one night with him four years ago. She hadn’t been back since she had graduated. Atlanta, where she lived now, was only an hour drive away but Emily avoided going back because it brought back powerful memories that were simultaneously amazing and filled with longing. She shouldn’t have bothered. Now, she was going there despite everything she had done to avoid it. “It is too fucking soon to go back!” she screamed at the laptop, running her hands through her spiky, short blonde hair in frustration. There was however, no respite from the feeling of nostalgia she felt as soon as she saw the inbox notification for the Show. Nor would the venue change; no matter how much she wanted to avoid it, it was still going to be Athens. “Gran, why is it so hard to forget some people? Why is it so hard to let go?” The feeling of nostalgia that arose from knowing she would go back to Athens, brought to mind another life-changing moment with her grandmother from ten years ago. Thinking back on that conversation and the impact it had on her life, Emily let out a long sigh. Tonight was a night of reflection, she thought in resignation. It was one of those rare moments when Emily allowed herself to think. She detested thinking. It wasn’t her thing; she preferred to act and then maybe think later, if at all. She grabbed her wine and let her mind wander ... When Emily was just sixteen she began drinking to cope with the guilt of her parent’s death. She had been smuggling drinks into the house each night after the accident and one night her grandmother caught her. Instead of scolding her sixteen-year-old granddaughter for drinking, Lara had grabbed a glass and sat on the floor of Emily’s room with her. “Lord knows we both need this,” she said. They drank and talked long into the night. About love, life, her parents and amidst blurs, hiccups, tears and burps, her grandmother said something that had stayed with her every since. “You see, my darling, you don’t forget some people because they have had a huge impact on your life. Some people make you laugh, others make you cry, some do both and it is those people that have an impact so great that you do not know where you end and they begin and when we lose them, we

lose part of ourselves. Remember your parents but know that you must live your life in honor of their memory.” Though the words had been said over a few drinks, they would change her life forever and it was these words she reflected on as she remember that night with him four years ago. In one night, he had shown her all those things and more and taken her to places she had never thought possible. That night with her grandmother ushered in a new dawn for a more responsible, cautious and wiser teenager. But the night with him, saw the birth for a more spontaneous and determined adult. Those experiences from her past combined to form the perfect blend of groundedness and daring that allowed her to forge a path for herself in the fashion industry. She was a person of her own, a recognized entity and not just another face in the crowd, something she never thought possible before that night. Emily had never forgotten that night with her grandmother despite how much she had changed. She never would. Just like she had never forgotten that night with him those years ago. And she knew that it was because of the impact he had made in her life. With everything she had done over the past four years, she still remembered that night. That night, she had thrown all caution to the wind and done exactly what she wanted to do. It was the beginning of true liberation for her; no one who knew her before that, would ever guess that she once lived life in an entirely different way. That night, the tables turned and so did her life much to the delight of her grandmother. Not that she had any regrets about what she did that night; far from it. Perhaps now, the only regret she had was that the night was the only one she had. Years after, all she had were bittersweet memories. Memories that kept her awake on cold nights wishing she had just one more night. The same memories saw her sometimes staring into space in broad daylight, remembering and reliving each moment in her head. She sometimes wished that she had done things differently but she also knew that she wouldn’t change the events of that night for anything. She didn’t know if it was by coincidence or if fate was having a good laugh at her right now. Calculating the days, Emily realized that today was exactly four years ago from that night ...

TWO



Four Years Ago… “Come on, Emily, don’t be a spoil sport. It is going to be such fun.” Shannon whined. Emily looked up from the novel she had in her hands and removed the glasses set precariously on the bridge of her nose. She regarded her roommate and best friend in silence for the better part of two minutes. She couldn’t believe how well they hit it off and how long their friendship had lasted. They were so totally different from each other that everyone who saw them together never failed to comment on their glaring differences. While Emily was blonde, thin and gawky; Shannon was a redhead, round little gypsy that turned heads when she walked. Emily wore glasses and looked geeky, with her nose constantly buried in one book or the other; Shannon, on the other hand, would not be caught dead wearing those horrible things called glasses nor would she touch any book with a ten-foot pole, God forbid, unless it was to doodle on it. While Emily was extremely introverted and tidy, her roommate was an extrovert and disorganized. Emily’s tireless efforts to keep their room in some semblance of order; would quickly be blown apart as Shannon left a trail of destruction wherever she went. In a nutshell, she had been best of friends with Shannon McGuire for the last three years, when they were thrown together as roommates in freshman year. They had hit it off at once despite knowing right away that they were exact opposites of one another. However, Emily knew that she wouldn’t exchange Shannon for anyone else, no matter how much trouble she could be. Her little gypsy friend was loyal, understanding, faithful and the most compassionate soul on earth despite her flashy outward appearance. It was why Emily was listening to her right now instead of out rightly screaming at her. “Shannon, you know how much I hate parties and noise.” She complained to her friend. “Of course I know,” Shannon said with a roll of her eyes. “But I have been trying to tell you that this is not the sort of parties with blaring speakers and loud music. And, we’ll be leaving early to make it up in time for Greg’s flight early in the morning.” She added. Now, it was Emily’s turn to roll her eyes. She knew that Greg’s early flight to Washington tomorrow morning wasn’t the reason that Shannon would agree to leave a party early. Greg was Shannon’s boyfriend and he was one of this year ’s graduates at the University of Georgia. He had graduated with distinction and Shannon was as proud of him as a mother. A special dinner party was organized in a hotel for those graduating with distinctions and they were allowed to bring with them two more guests. Greg’s parents were dead like hers and he had given the invitations to Shannon. Now, Shannon wanted Emily to come with her. Placing the book on the bed, Emily inclined her head to the left to study her friend. Shannon was dressed as usual in flamboyant colors that threatened to burn the retina. Emily could make out shades

of yellow, bright pink, magenta and gold. She shook her head, slightly distracted. Her friend was just a tad crazy. No, more than a tad, she corrected when she caught her first real look at Shannon’s hair. “What on earth did you do to your hair?” she exclaimed in astonishment. Shannon shrugged and plopped on the bed beside Emily. “I thought you would never notice,” she murmured impishly, patting her hair and preening like a peacock. Emily continued to stare at the hair in question, unconsciously raising a hand to touch it to see if it was as real as she saw it. “Nothing so bad as to get your mouth hanging open like that,” she replied with a naughty grin. “I only cut it a bit and dyed it in the colors of the rainbow; you know how my Greg loves the rainbow.” She said with a throaty laugh. Emily shook her head. Really, she shouldn’t be amazed at her friend’s behavior anymore but each time, she allowed herself to be surprised by the different impulsive decision that Shannon make on an almost daily basis. Just this morning, Shannon had been a redhead, now her hair looked like it was cut so haphazardly that there appeared to be no pattern and was dyed all the colors of the rainbow. “But why would you do that? You loved your red hair.” She said, looking her friend right in the eye. It was true. Shannon always claimed that her red hair was her best feature without which she would just have been an ordinary Irish girl in a foreign country. Shannon just shrugged again. “I want to make Greg’s last night in Georgia memorable.” She said with a dare devil grin. Just as soon as the words were out, her shoulders drooped and worry entered into her grey eyes. “What if he goes and forgets me? You know we are world apart and he might decide to go for an American when he is out of here. Maybe if I make tonight so special for him, he wouldn’t forget me? I want him to be my forever.” she said worriedly. Emily sighed in exasperation. Shannon could be so insecure of herself at times like this but only when she was alone with Emily. Emily shifted towards her to draw her into a hug. “You know that he wouldn’t dare. Grey loves you too much to forget you and you know it. Why would you even think that?” She held her friend in her embrace, patting the dyed hair down her back. Shannon was petite but curvy and everyone knew that Greg just loved her to pieces as she did him. Since his graduation, Shannon had been fretting, worried that she still had one year to go while Greg would leave the city. She had started to convince herself that the distance would tear them apart and she would be left heartbroken. Emily however had seen the couple when they were around each other. They only had eyes for each other and couldn’t bare being away from each other, on the holidays or even during the day when classes separated them. Though Emily herself had never been in a relationship of any kind, she guessed that Shannon and Greg’s love was the real thing and wished for something similar for herself someday.

“Believe me, I know … but what if?” Shannon asked, leaning back to stare into Emily’s baby blue eyes. “Don’t think about what ifs right now but what is.” She said firmly. “And right now, ‘what is’ is that Greg loves you and you love him; that should suffice.” “Thank you.” Shannon said softly, squeezing her into a tight hug. “Anytime,” Emily managed to mumble out through the tight hug. “Then, you have to go with me to the dinner party. I so do not want to hear anything else about it.” Shannon said breezily, getting up from the bed and walking up to the full length mirror in the corner of the room. She pranced in front of it to admire her new hair style. Her eyes caught Emily’s in the mirror and she saw that another argument was on its way. “You are coming with me to support me and my boyfriend. You can’t not come; Greg will be so heartbroken.” She emphasized, one hand dramatically splayed over her chest. Emily sighed heavily and rolled her eyes so that Shannon would see her in the mirror. “You are a nag; you know?” she asked rhetorically but Shannon answered anyway. “Yes I know but you still love me.” She answered, turning and smiling at Emily. “So you coming or what?” she asked, arms folded, daring to to defy her. “You have to promise that we will leave when I say we should.” Emily bargained. Shannon clapped her hands gleefully, jumping on the spot like a child. “Of course, I promise.” she replied “Now, we need to get you prepared. You can’t go looking like this.” Shannon was disdainfully observing Emily’s clothes and then turned to her wardrobe. She looked into the wardrobe while Emily went back to her book. Shannon was a fashionista that prided herself on looking the very best. She was always dressed in dazzling colors, but Emily had no such desire to look this way. If Shannon wanted to fix her for the party, she would only tolerate it to please her friend. After all, she was going there only to satisfy Shannon and nothing more. She hoped that they would come back before midnight so she could finish up the novel she was reading before bed.

********* Coming to this party was without a doubt the most boring thing that Emily had ever done in her life. And she had done some pretty boring things too but this party was the highlight of them all. Emily sipped on her champagne and sighed for what must be the thousandth time that night. She could be home right now, curled up on her soft bed with a bowl of ice cream. She should be reading the

standalone romance novel she started just this afternoon. Exams were over but courtesy of Shannon, she couldn’t do as she pleased. She was here watching men in suits and ladies in varying lengths of dresses. They canvassed the hall speaking to this dignitary and that professional, giving boring speeches and clapping afterwards. She knew that Shannon was even more bored than she was but she wasn’t feeling very charitable towards her friend in that moment. She had asked that they leave fifteen minutes ago but she was still there, sipping on champagne. Emily knew that she had had too much to drink; but it was all there was to do, short of falling asleep in her chair. “Please don’t be mad, Emily but PowerBit seemed to have taken an interest in Greg and he cannot very well leave them now.” She said, her grey eyes pleading with Emily. It was a kind of dinner party where leading names and brands in the market met graduating students like Greg with marked achievements and distinctions. For the new graduates, it was a field day because it was like a dream come true. PowerBit, a powerful scientific research company in computer engineering and software development had immediately shown interest in Greg after his citation was handed out. He had barely sat down with them for five minutes before he was invited over. Other invited guests either walked around, admiring the various artwork on display, formed small groups of conversation or sat in bored silence like she and Shannon. Emily wanted to go home but since she wasn’t the type to hitch a ride, she would have to wait for Greg to finish so he could drop her off. She was resigned to the fact that Shannon wouldn’t be sleeping in their room tonight; she was going to be with Greg all night since he was leaving early in the morning for Washington. Emily grabbed yet another bottle of champagne from a passing waiter and set it on the table. “Don’t you think you have had enough to drink?” Shannon asked, eyeing the bottle warily. She had barely had a sip since Greg was invited by a representative of PowerBit. It was obvious that she still fretted over the issue they discussed in the afternoon. “What else is there to do but eat and drink?” Emily asked mulishly. “I am sorry. I shouldn’t have made you come when you didn’t want to.” Her friend said, looking downcast and dejected. The words sobered Emily. She realized that she was behaving like a petulant child; she chided herself. While Emily had her back to the PowerBit table, Shannon faced them squarely and she had been casting anxious glances over since Greg joined them about thirty minutes ago. Emily shook her head at her selfishness. Her best friend, the only friend she had in the whole world was seated right in front of her, worrying her pretty head away over her boyfriend’s departure and all she could do was complain about the dullness at the party. She was the worst friend ever, she thought to herself. What were a few hours at a boring party for a friend? Shannon had done crazier things for her in the time they had known each other.

“No, I am sorry.” She apologized, trying to think of what to do to make it up to her friend. “How about you go join Greg at their table and brazenly introduce yourself as his girlfriend?” she asked impulsively. Her words surprised both her friend and herself. She was not the type to be so impulsive or daring but she wanted to erase the worried look on her friend’s face. Or perhaps, it was the wine doing the talking. “Wow!” she declared admiringly. “That is just the best suggestion ever. Why didn’t I think of it before?” Shannon said already standing and grabbing her purse from the table. “Come with?” she asked her. Even though Emily knew she’d be even more bored on her own, she shook her head. She was a student of Creative Arts and a freelance writer, any talks about science churned her stomach. Conversation at the table with the company would definitely be more boring than sitting here on her own, thank you. “I will be fine by myself, go on.” She waved her friend off in the direction of the table where Greg sat with three other men, talking animatedly. “Thanks, G.” Shannon said, blowing her a kiss. When she was gone, Emily fidgeted with the clasp on her purse for another five minutes, looking around the room for nothing in particular. She turned in her seat to look over at the PowerBit table some ten feet or so away and saw that Shannon was now seated beside Greg and seemed to be enjoying the conversation. Good for her, she thought. The bottle of champagne still stood unopened in front of her and she turned her gaze to it, trying to decide if she should just open it and have yet another drink. She continued to stare at it undecided for another five minutes. “Now, what is a beautiful thing such as yourself doing here all alone with an unopened bottle in front of you?” A silky male, voice interrupted her thoughts. Emily did not even hear the compliment; it flew past her like the wind. The first things she noticed were his feet; though it was not so much as his feet as what he wore on his feet. He was wearing a pair of white and blue sneakers and his bare legs went way up to disappear beneath a pair of knee length commando shorts. Emily allowed her gaze to travel all the way up inch by inch as she took in his midnight blue polo shirt. He was tall, she thought absently. The words ‘I am King’ were boldly imprinted on the front of a shirt which flattered his abdominals and chest. Feeling curious by now, Emily raised her eyes to meet his gaze. They were the most startling brilliant shade of gold and were surrounded by eyebrows that were almost meeting and lashes that were so long they were almost feminine. His hair was a lovely sheen of black that curled over his head like a crown. He was wearing a grin that showed deep dimples on his clean shaven cheeks. Everyone that Emily had seen during the course of the evening had formal attire, mostly in the red and/or black colors of the college. The guy standing in front of her though looked totally out of place

in his casual clothes. But he was smiling at her as if he had no idea that he looked like the duckling in the midst of swans. “May I have this seat?” he asked, indicating the seat that Shannon just left. He sat without waiting for her nod of approval. “You seem to want to open the bottle but can’t pluck up the courage to,” he observed. She was still staring at him in amazement. “What are you wearing?” she blurted out without conscious thought. It was the second time that night that she would be blurting out exactly what she was thinking but Emily barely noticed. He however did not take offence, smiling broadly. “What is wrong with what I have on?” he asked with a daring smile. He leaned forward and opened the wine, pouring for both of them. She reached out and grabbed the glass of wine, downing it in two loud gulps. Being friends with Shannon, she was used to having guys come over to their room looking for her friend but this was different. No guy had ever singled her out for his attention before and she didn’t know what to say. Why not just start by answering his question? A little voice prompted in her head. Her unwanted company was staring at her in amusement as she set down the empty glass and she promptly forgot the question he had asked. “You must have been thirsty,” he said, imitating her and throwing the contents of his cup down his throat in one gulp. She cast down her gaze and her eyes caught the words on his shirt again. She remembered the question he asked her. “Everyone here is dressed formally, except you,” she spoke out of the blue again. He only stared at her as if she was nuts. “That is what is wrong with what you are wearing,” she explained lamely. A mischievous smile reaching all the way into his eyes appeared on his lips and he leaned forward across the table to reach her. “Why is everyone here dressed formal, do you know?” he asked her in a conspiratorial whisper. She could smell his male cologne and they invaded her senses, drawing her forward. “I don’t know,” she said drunkenly in answer to his question. “Really?” he whispered comically. “But you are also dressed formally,” he said with a naughty grin. As if she didn’t quite know what she was getting at, she looked down at herself. She was dressed much like the other ladies in the room in a long, black, silver sequined dress that Shannon had fished out of their wardrobe in the afternoon. The dress was her twentieth birthday gift from her grandmother but Emily had never worn it until tonight. The dress was tight and emphasized her skinny body which she always hid inside jean and shirts, her every day wear.

What Emily didn’t know was that the dress emphasized her baby blues and brought out the colorful highlights in her blonde hair which Shannon had simply braided in a French plait down her back and then twisted into a doughnut at the base of her neck. Her feet were clad in a three-and-a-half-inch pair of silver shoes and her matching silver purse was on the table. Her ensemble was completed by a simple silver chain on her neck having a little, Cinderella slipper as pendant. When Shannon finished dressing her up, she had stood back to admire her handiwork with a triumphant smile. “In the three years I have known you, this is the first time I can actually say that there is hope for you yet.” She had said. Emily looked sheepishly at her companion. He was right again; she was dressed rather formally. “I guess so,” she said. She sat back in her chair, looking at the odd guy in front of her. “So, tell me then, why are you dressed this way?” he insisted. Emily was confused. “My roommate over there insisted,” she explained, nodding her head in the general direction of the PowerBit table. “And thank heavens that I did too. Everyone else is except you. I guess it is the dress code for the event,” she told him matter-of-factly. The guy leaned forward more. “Do you have your invitation card with you? I would bet that there is no dress code indicated on it.” He said with a bemused smile. Her reserve gone now, she picked her purse from the table and opened it to retrieve her invitation card. She turned it this way and that, trying to see if there was any dress code indicated and saw that indeed, there wasn’t. “I guess formal is the conventional attire for events such as this.” She shrugged. “Then why I am in here?” he asked her with obvious flourish. She was thrown by his question. Indeed, if the dress code was formal, he wouldn’t be allowed entry into the venue at all. “True,” she muttered. Why was this guy always right? He was now staring at her as if she was a particularly interesting piece of specimen under a microscope. She reached for the bottle and poured herself another glass. “I see.” He said with a look she couldn’t define in his eyes. “What do you see?” she asked him warily. He was still staring unblinkingly at her. “You hate this party, don’t you?” he asked her after a prolonged silence of just watching her. She had no idea what that had got to anything that he saw but she nodded her head. He grinned.

“So do I.” he informed her. “You came with one of the new graduates, yes?” he asked again. Again, she nodded her head. It seemed that she had lost the power of speech in the face of his quick grins, questions and the wine. “Then, I suppose not having one of the mega super-duper rich companies come for you will be quite boring then.” He surmised. “I guess your friend is being wooed by one of the companies right now.” Her tongue finally gained freedom from its speechlessness. “Yes, along with his girlfriend who is my best friend.” As soon as the words left her mouth, her throat felt parched and she reached for the glass she just filled. He raised a full eyebrow at her but did not comment. “I do not blame you for feeling bored to death. I am one of the new graduates of the school and believe me, I am bored to the hilt. Who needs all this, if he’s truly got the skills and talent?” He asked, sweeping an all-encompassing gaze through the room. A waiter passed by their table bearing a tray and he suddenly shot up from his seat, snatched a plate of dessert from a waiter and placed it in front of her. “Aww, pardon my manners,” he said to her, clasping his forehead. “Ryan Jones, a fresh graduate of this grand school and a photographer by hobby.” He introduced himself, extending his hand for a handshake. For a moment, Emily seemed to forget her name as she stared at his outstretched hand. This cute guy was introducing himself to her of all the beautiful ladies seated in the room. At first, she had thought that perhaps he wanted to ask her for something but now he’d been here for over ten minutes. “Emily Wilson, Junior, same college,” she said shortly, refusing to take his hand though she had no reason not to. Ryan shrugged as if he was used to this kind of rebuff. “Great, how come I never came across you in school?” he asked wonderingly. “The school is quite large. Different campuses too.” She hiccupped. “True,” he said quietly. “I wouldn’t have forgotten your face if I had seen you around.” He said. Emily looked up into his eyes to see that he was totally checking her out. Ryan was looking at her with something akin to appreciation in his eyes as if he liked what he saw. It was the first time any man had looked at her this way and she was at a loss for words. She didn’t know how to react. She dipped her fingers into the dessert plate. She came up with some cheese and put it in her mouth. Ryan’s gaze followed her actions and he licked his lips as she swallowed. “You have the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen,” he whispered. “And sexy lips too,” he said bluntly.

It took her a moment to know that the cute ‘I am King’ Ryan was flirting with her. Her! Emily Wilson. She fumbled about in her head for what to say. If it were Shannon here at the table in that moment, she asked herself, what would she do? Most definitely smile and flirt right back, the answer was undisputable. But she wasn’t her friend even though she would like to be just for the sake of throwing a witty comeback to this handsome guy’s flattery. “Come on, a guy compliments you and you ignore him?” Ryan said with a teasing grin. “I never asked for your compliment,” she replied. She was starting to get used to the grin that was all over his face. “You are bored with the party, so am I. How about we head out right now?” he asked out of the blue again. What was wrong with this guy? She thought. He throws out a couple of cheap lines and now expects her to leave with him. She didn’t understand him at all. It was like he was playing a game that only he understood. “I can’t do that. I barely know you.” She murmured. He relaxed in his chair to give her that look again and she felt like squirming. “Yes, I got it - you are the hesitant type, never impulsive, always cautious.” He exclaimed suddenly like he just had a eureka moment. “Tell me, what have you ever done just for the fun of it?” he asked her. His remark and question was so sudden and perceptive that her gaze instantly flew up to meet his. This guy was more astute than she gave him credit for. He had been studying her personality the entire time and she had been helping him each step of the way! “As you must have rightly surmised, I am logical and think things through before acting upon them,” she said tartly. It bugged her that she had given away any air of mystery she might have had in the first few minutes of meeting this guy. “Then, you need to change.” He declared with a firm nod of his head. He reached across the table and held her hands in his. “Emily, life will not wait on you forever. You have to take those chances, live for the moment, hope for nothing, anticipate the best and go to bed each night, rest assured that you have squeezed out everything you can from each unforgiving minute that you are lucky to see.” Perhaps it was the wine in her head but his words were sinking into her head with resounding echoes. His words were similar to the mantra that Shannon kept telling her over the years but to which she never heeded. Live for today, there is no promise of tomorrow. But Emily was being extremely careful of making mistakes. She had made one mistake with her thoughtlessness and she had paid dearly for it; her parents had lost their lives over that one mistake. Now, the same message was said to her from a stranger that barely knew her. Was she that much of a drag? Was it so obvious that her life was pretty much empty? “Cautious is good, it saves people from death.” She whispered. She had no idea who she was trying

to convince; Ryan or herself. Ryan was looking at her curiously now. “Correct me if I am wrong but is there anything that can save people from death?” he asked as if he totally understood how she felt. When she continued to look at him unseeingly, he added quietly, “People die, Emily. We can’t help it.” That was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Before she knew it, she told him all about her parent’s death. She told him how they had gone for a much deserved holiday in the Bahamas and how she had called them incessantly, wanting them to come home a week before her sweet sixteenth birthday instead of the scheduled three days originally planned. She had been so churlish that they gave in at last to her whines and booked an earlier flight home. They never reached home but died in a fatal plane crash. By the time, she was through, silent tears were rushing down her face. Through it all, Ryan patiently listened and did not utter a single word. He simply held her hands in his, gently rubbing her knuckles with his fingers to urge her on. Encouraged by his silent actions and the empathy she saw in his eyes, she took a deep breath and dabbed at her tears with the tips of her fingers. She felt so drained and wished she could just get up and leave the place. “I think we need to get out of here,” he muttered as if he read her thoughts precisely. He was already standing up and taking her with him. Emily didn’t know how but Shannon was beside them in an instant. “What is going on here?” she demanded. Emily sniffed and attempted to explain but Ryan beat her to it. “I guess you are the friend she came with. I am Ryan Jones and I will just be taking her out for a walk,” he said. “She is safe with me, I promise.” He added. Shannon looked into his eyes for a long moment while he held her gaze. Shannon gave a small nod at last as if coming to a decision. Without another word, she hugged Emily and turned back on her heels. Some part of Emily recognized that Shannon had just helped her make a decision about Ryan and pronounced him safe enough to be with her friend. She decided that if Shannon thought he was safe, then he must truly be; her Irish friend was never wrong about an individual’s personality in all the four years they had been together. She followed Ryan out of the hall.

THREE



He took her to an ice cream bar. They both sat outside a nearby convenience store in the dark of the night with the stars smiling down at them both. Ryan had not said a word concerning her sordid tale but he was with her emotionally, she felt it. She wondered how he was able to do it; showing her his support without so much as a single word. Strangely, her mind was completely blank as she dug into her plate of ice cream. “You did not kill them.” She heard him say. She looked up into his eyes. They shone like a cat’s in the neon signs of the store and the night stars. They bored right into hers. His plate of ice cream remained unopened in front of him. She nodded her head slowly. “I know,” she whispered, “though they would still be alive if it weren’t for my petulance.” Ryan was shaking his head. “Maybe they would but you don’t know that for sure. There are a thousand and one ways to die, Emily,” he said with a sad inflection in his voice. Before she could dwell on it, he talked on. “Shit happens and we sometimes allow it or cause it to happen but when it does, the greatest mistake we do, the greatest ill we do to ourselves is allow ourselves be soaked up in the shit. When we do this, Emily, we will be living a life of worry. We put our lives on hold for nothing but conjectures when we should only try to become a better person in the most positive way.” She stared at his lips as they moved. If she were to place his age, he couldn’t be more than two or three years older than her twenty-two but his words revealed a wisdom beyond his years. As much as she was intrigued by his words, she also knew that they were true. “I know. It is just hard to let go,” she said to him. “What would your parents have you do?” he asked suddenly. His question came as a blow to her senses. There was no doubt that her parents wouldn’t have blamed her for their death. They were most loving and kind, their only fault was loving their daughter so immensely. They would still want her to be the best she could be. “Emily, your parents’ death should have taught you the most vital of lessons; life is short and you have to live it to the fullest. Aim high, shoot higher; go for your dreams; scream with friends; make yourself happy. It is the only way to live,” he said. She didn’t know what to say in the face of his wise words. Spoon in hand, she stared at him. He returned her stare for a moment before opening his plate and beginning to eat. Still clueless about what to say, she dug her spoon into hers and began to eat too. As they sat on the table, eating their ice cream, she remembered the awful teenager that she had been.

Her parents were hardworking citizens that almost never took a single day off. However, they always had time for their only daughter and child. She was raised with love and affection, perhaps too much. Selfish, spoilt and self-centered did not begin to describe her as she always got what she wanted. In the end, she learnt the hard way that life was not a bed of roses, you had to work for it to have it. She wished she had learnt that before her parents’ death. Steadily afterwards, her grandmother had helped her to get back to her feet. She owed her life to the woman, she thought. Living with her had taught her to be responsible for her actions and mature. She learnt how to think for herself and for others. She learnt how to be selfless instead of selfabsorbed. She taught herself to be thoughtful of other people’s feelings, she taught herself to think before taking actions. She related less to other people; the less she did, the lesser the chance of hurting them, wasn’t it? Where had she gone wrong? she thought. She didn’t want to hurt others with her selfishness ever again. Gradually, she had let go of the guilt of her parents’ death but with a promise to constantly be better. Perhaps, she had taught herself too well, she considered. She decided that she was way too cautious, too thoughtful, too introverted; Shannon had said so too. Now, this guy, Ryan was in effect saying the same thing; that she was overdoing it, overplaying her guilt and putting her life on hold. Was there a middle ground, she wondered. She decided to try. When they finished the ice cream, she asked him to take her home. He hailed a cab without questions. Through the ride, she expected him to demand at least a comment or reaction to his speech from a while ago but he only held her hand in his. It was like he had said his bit and the rest were entirely up to her. She was beginning to respect him for this; he only advised and suggested, never pushed. Again, she wondered how he became so wise. Perhaps, she should have asked but she didn’t. When they reached the small apartment she shared with Shannon, she invited him in. She was feeling a bit hazy and woozy from too much wine, the emotional dredge and ice cream. He closed the door behind him and turned to face her. She took her first impulsive moment and kissed him on the lips. It was unlike any feeling she ever had before. She felt both hot and cold immediately and simultaneously. It was like an electric current ran between their lips at the touch, enough to take her breath away. His gaze flew to hers, his fingers came up to touch his lips and then hers. Her senses tingled at the touch. This time, there was nothing impulsive about it. Staring into his eyes, she reached up on her tiptoes and brought her mouth to his. At first, he stood rigid as his lips touched hers unmoving then that electric feeling sizzled again. He made a low sound deep in his throat and snatched her to his chest. His lips descended on hers with such tenderness and passion that she was swept off her feet. She reached for him, groping his chest and every other part of his body that she could reach between them.

He grabbed her butt and pushed her up and closer such so that she could feel his erection. She moaned and rubbed herself against him drawing a hiss from him. She put her hands underneath his polo to caress his bare stomach, running her hand all the way across his chest. “Sweet Jesus!” he muttered as if in pain. “Are you sure about this Emily?” he asked, trying to pull away from her. She didn’t answer his question. She brought her lips back to his and kissed him deeper. He had said she was not taking chances but he was the one trying to be the gentleman when she wanted him to be wild with her. She took another impulsive decision. Ryan sighed pleasurably as she brought a hand down to squeeze his hard erection. Wrapping her legs around his butt, she ground her pelvis into him. The action seemed to drive him wild as he turned and pushed her up against the wall. He held her there with his hips and without halting the kiss, he reached for the boat neck of her black dress and yanked it down to reveal two ripe breasts with rosy tips; she wasn’t wearing a bra. His eyes were fixed on her breasts and his mouth hung open as if he was afraid to touch them. Tilting her chest upwards, she reached for the nape of his neck and pushed his mouth to one nipple. She shuddered as a hot breath grazed over her breast and his wet tongue touched her nipple. He began to suckle her gently just as she delved her fingers into his luxurious hair, massaging his scalp and writhing in ecstasy. Without stopping, he dragged her dress down past her hips and let it fall to the floor. His hands found her panties and slipped his fingers inside. She was already soaking wet and his fingers slid in easily. Her mind went wild with lust and she bucked into his hands. “So tight,” he said into her mouth, “So fucking tight.” She only kissed him deeper. “Where is the bedroom?” he asked urgently. Now, he was talking, she thought with an inward triumphant smile. She pointed a finger in the direction of her bedroom and he liften her up. He reached their small room in ten powerful strides with his finger still inside her and a breast in his mouth while she threw her head back, making small mewling sounds that seemed to drive him wilder. “Oh Emily.” Ryan was as exhilarated and aroused as she was. Emily reached for his torso with the palm of one hand began to fondle his bulge with the other. He was as hard as a rock. He groaned when she dared to reach for the solid mound of flesh inside his trousers and drag it out. She began to stroke him up and down, each groan only intensifying her excitement. “Emily.” He cried again. Something inexplicable had taken control of Emily. She forgot about being thoughtful or disciplined. The only thing that she could think of was Ryan burying his hard member inside her. Hell, I long for his cock deep inside me! It was the truth. She didn’t care about how impure her thoughts were. Pleasure. This was the only word that she could think of.

Ryan stopped suckling her nipple and began to trace kisses from her neck down to her abdomen. He moved lower, slowly plastering his lips on her warm pussy and then flicking his tongue smoothly over her clit. It was incredible. Emily lost control of all her thought, her speech and her energy; just as his tongue penetrated the insides of her pussy. When he stopped to glance up at her, Emily smiled looked down at him begging with her eyes that she wanted him now. Finally, she muttered her first words since the raw animal hunger took over her senses. “Fuck me, Ryan,” she whispered, “I want you deep inside me.” That was all he needed. When she felt the heavy shove of his cock inside her, Emily gave in to all her feelings. She felt connected like she never had before. She urged to go deeper, harder and faster. Her ecstasy built up with each of his powerful strokes. Harder and faster he went, driving into her with everything he had, and just as she started to climax he screamed out a low guttural sound as he spilt his seed into her. Spent, they both fell into a blissful sleep.

********* The next morning, he was gone before she woke up. It was as if he was never there, like she never met him. There was absolutely no evidence that he had been in her room at all except the feeling between her thighs and note he left on her pillow. It was the first thing she saw when she opened her eyes and she knew immediately that he was gone. There were only three words written on the paper in a large manly scrawl. I am sorry. Holding the paper to her chest, she thought about everything that happened. He might be sorry but she wasn’t. It was the most delicious night of her life and she was going to hold it dear. It seemed that Ryan Jones had his own woes but he had managed to make her let go of hers and see through her cocoon last night. Just like he respected her decision last night, she was going to respect his. She was not going to seek him out or try to find him. He had been hesitant to make love to her but she had left him with no choice; he was a perfect gentleman all through, her perfect gentleman. Curiously, she was certain that he had a reason for leaving her this way and she understood even though she had no idea what his reasons were. Everything that happened last night was startlingly clear in her mind and she had no intention of ever forgetting. They were going to be her memories to keep. He wouldn’t be there to see her change but she was going to. Taking a determined breath, she got out of bed. The first thing she grabbed was a pair of scissors. Shannon found her in front of the mirror, cutting off her hair.

Ryan

FOUR



July, 2016 His little ray of sunshine was gone. Tears were streaming down his face onto the picture in his hand but Ryan Jones barely noticed. He traced his fingers along the frame of the picture, feeling the weight of the world on his shoulders. How was he to live without his little sunshine? He asked himself for the umpteenth time over the last two hours since the doctor told him the news. Hardly anyone would believe that Claire was not his but he loved her like his own. She was the brightest child in the entire world despite being born with Down Syndrome. Right from the start, the doctors had warned him that she would not live into her teenage years but his heart had hoped and refused to believe that Claire would leave him. “It was a miracle that she lived this long,” the doctor had said. Ryan had really wanted to smash his fist into the doctor ’s face. How was eleven years of living a miracle? It was damned too short! For the past eleven years, it had been him and his little sunshine. Despite her medical condition, Claire was bright, fun and she had filled all the void spaces in his heart and now, he couldn’t imagine living without her. Why? He asked all over again. Why did she have to suffer this fate? He wondered bitterly. Claire was only a baby; his baby and she shouldn’t have been born with the disease that finally claimed her life. He remembered clearly the circumstances that led to her birth; who could ever forget? It was twelve years ago and he was sixteen years old; he wasn’t even an adult by then but fate had thrown him a fast ball so cruel that he lost his youth forever in that year. The year of Claire’s conception was the most gruesome one of his life. He should have known better, he could have done better but in the end, he hadn’t. Those months, he had lived in a haze, blaming himself for everything while shuffling from the police department to the hospital and then from the court to the hospital again. The paparazzi would not let him rest either and besieged him everywhere he went. At night, he would drink himself to sleep, wishing everyone would just leave him the hell alone. His misery had continued for seven months until Claire was born prematurely. Jasmine, Claire’s mother had suddenly gone into labor for torturous hours before finally giving birth to a squealing infant in the hospital where she had been all through the pregnancy. He was there in the delivery room from start to finish, sweating, cursing, hoping and praying. When the baby slid out, full of blood and goo, Jasmine was alive only long enough to see her baby held up by the doctor ’s. The stress of the past seven months finally got to him and the last thought on his mind before he collapsed was that she was lucky to escape it all into death. He wished he would too.

He was out for just a short time and woke to find himself on a stretcher. The doctors and nurses obviously did not have time for a fainting teenager when they were still trying to save the baby and her mother. When he opened his eyes, the nurse was cleaning up the baby beside him. He instantly knew that there was something wrong with the baby with the way her skull and hands were proportioned. However, his attention was not held by the deficiency he noticed in that instant. He was pulled by the baby’s eyes on him, it was like her steadfast gaze had woken him up from his faint, urging him to come back to her. There was no way he could be sure but he could have sworn that the baby smiled when his eyes clashed with hers. “Ryan, thank God you are awake. The baby has not taken her eyes off you since you fainted.” The nurse said to him in a relieved voice. He barely heard her; he was fascinated by the baby’s eyes. They were a pair of brilliant gold; exactly like his. Her hair though fairer, was blonde like her mother ’s but there was no mistaking that she had his eyes. And she was staring unblinkingly at him. He was entranced and instantly captivated. For him, that was the most defining moment of his life. He had fallen in love for the first time. Losing his mom when he was only three and growing up with his busy father as he did, he couldn’t lay claims to being loved or having ever loved, but the tiny baby in the nurse’s hand had him wrapped around her little finger in less than three seconds of setting eyes on her. “Claire,” he had whispered to her. When the nurse was through, she placed the girl in his hands and his heart almost dropped at how fragile she was. But his Claire was not fragile of heart. Still holding his gaze, her tiny fingers latched onto his thumb as if to trying to tell him something. “We are in this together,” he fancied she was saying to him. In that moment, though she was not formed from his sperm, she immediately became his. An hour later, the doctor diagnosed her with Down syndrome. At first, he was heartbroken for his baby. However, he made up his mind to love her as much as he could. Perhaps, love would help her evade the death that the doctor warned him would surely come to lay claim to her life before long, he had convinced himself. He had been wrong. Loving his Claire was the greatest thing he had ever done, he knew without a single doubt. And she had loved him too. Oh, how his Claire had loved him. From the moment he brought her home from the hospital, she wouldn’t sleep anywhere else except on his chest. Loving her had helped him to love himself too and he retraced his footsteps to pick up the broken pieces of his life. He learnt to forgive his father and let go of the past. He brushed himself up and took reign of his father ’s companies, teaching himself along the way. As soon as he was stable, he had employed the best specialist doctors to care for her medically and a live-in nurse to cater for her needs when he couldn’t be with her. He never spent a night away from her if there was absolutely no need. One of such moments was when he had to go to college. Schooling for him had been on hold since the ‘incident’ surrounding Claire’s conception hit the news

but after Claire’s birth, he realized that he wanted to complete his education not for his own sake but so that he could lay a good precedent for his daughter. He started school again on her first birthday. He was the oldest in his class but he did not mind in the least; he lived only for his Claire. Another three years and he gained admission into the University of Georgia. That was when Claire spoke her first word. She called him ‘da’. He hadn’t wanted to go, he hated to leave her alone for long periods of time but he was assured in the knowledge that Nina, the nurse he employed loved Claire as much as he did, perhaps even more. She was the one who finally persuaded him to go. College did nothing to distract him from home. He didn’t live in school, attending classes infrequently just so he would not miss any stage of her growth. Watching Claire grow was pure bliss. Though her development was slow, she was bright and loving. She was patient and she understood him like no one else ever did. She was his best friend as he was hers. They braved the world together and took solace in each other ’s company. With her, he learnt to smile, play and have fun. Knowing that she didn’t have long to live despite the tiny hope in his heart, he spent every waking moment of his life to make each day her best yet. Gradually as she grew, defying death each year, he learnt to live for the moment and worry less about what tomorrow held for them both. Wanting a normal life for her, he enrolled her in school when she was five and taught her at home by himself whenever he could. During the holidays, they would visit interesting places in different parts of the world. He soon took to taking pictures of her everywhere they went and discovered that he had an interest in photography. “Da, you would make the best photographer.” Claire told him one day when they were both looking at the pictures of them that he had taken during their visit to the Eiffel tower. Her words opened the gates to a hobby for him and he took to it like fish to water. He had countless pictures of pictures of places, people, animals and more of Claire to show for it. Graduation from college set him free once more to spend time with his daughter and pursue his hobby; his companies were expanding and money had never been an issue. Everything had been right and perfect in his world. He had no idea that it was all soon going to end. Claire had come down with an inexplicable fever some days ago and he rushed her to the hospital. Treatment commenced immediately and she was starting to get better only to slump barely minutes after she was discharged and he brought her home again. There had been no goodbyes; it was so sudden that he still didn’t believe that she was gone. He had taken her to the hospital again, pleading with the doctor to revive her but it was useless. The doctor said she died even before they made it back to hospital. His entire world was thrown into darkness. His ray of sunshine was gone. He looked at the picture in his hand again, the tears now coming faster and harder. It was one of the pictures he took of her recently when they went to Japan during the school holidays. She had been so happy and free. He brought the picture to his chest and cried some more. How was he going to live without Claire?



********* Breathing heavily, Ryan stopped punching the bag in the gym and dropped to the floor. He was tired already but he still felt like hitting the bag till he either lost consciousness or hurt himself. He missed Claire. The gym had been set up in the house for her only last year. Her doctor, Dr. Vamp was of the opinion that she could gain more strength in her body if she exercised frequently but lightly. He wasted no time in building an exercise room in their house worthy of the best in the world. The punching bag came five days after her death and he spent the better part of his days and nights in here, punching the bag. It was exactly one month after her death today. He rose up to punch the bag again but felt a hand on his bare shoulder. It was Nina, Claire’s nurse. The older woman had been with him for eleven years now and felt his grief. Even after Claire’s death when he informed her that she could go back to her home in Riverside with a huge settlement from him, she declined his offer and continued to stay with him. He knew that she thought that he would probably kill himself or do something crazy but she didn’t know that he couldn’t as much as he wanted to. When Claire was nine years old, she had gone for one of her frequent check-ups in the hospital where she learned that she didn’t have too long to live. She had come home to him, not crying but with a brave face and a mission. She made him promise to be happy if she did die. She wanted him to get married and give birth to cute siblings for her; she would watch over them all from heaven, she had said. She coerced him into making a pinky promise, while he prayed there would be no need to fulfil his promise. Now, he was stuck. How was he supposed to fulfil his promise to her when he didn’t even want to live? “It is enough. You will only hurt yourself.” Nina said quietly. He turned to her with grief stricken face. “I miss her Nina. I miss her so much every day. What am I going to do?” He asked her desolately. Nina took him by the elbow and guided him to a seat in the room. “You know what Claire would have loved you to do.” She told him, handling him a bottle of chilled water. He took the bottle from her but did not open it. “She wanted me to move on, she told me already.” He whispered. Nina nodded. “I know.” He looked over at her and she smiled sadly. “She told me. She also said that I should ensure that you kept your promise too.” He shook his head. His sunshine had left no stone unturned as much as she could.

“It is hard, so damned hard.” He said. “Believe me, I know. I loved her like no other too.” Nina had tears in her eyes now but she sniffed them back, stubbornly refusing to let them fall. They both fell silent, lost in thought. “I have been thinking,” Nina spoke up, “I think you should go back to photography. Claire loved it and you are so good at it.” She proclaimed. He remained silent, wondering where she was going with this. She was right however; Claire would have wanted him to continue with his hobby no matter what. “There is this International Fashion Show coming up. My son is registered as one of the photographers but his wife gave birth prematurely and he is refusing to leave her side; it’s his first child, you see. When he told me of this, I thought you could take his place.” She explained, looking at him warily as if she could already guess what his answer would be. He started to shake his head but she raised a hand. “Think of Claire,” she said. At a loss for what to say or do, he opened the bottle of water and brought it to his mouth. He gulped down the water without feeling the chill wash down his throat. He couldn’t imagine taking pictures of models and clothes when Claire was dead but that was exactly what Nina was asking him to do. She got him hooked too; Claire would have wanted him to go for it. “Where is this Show taking place?” he asked on a sigh. There was a suspicious silence from the woman seated next to him. “Athens, Georgia.” She said at last. He knew why she was hesitant to tell him. It was where he had fallen in love for the second time in his life. It was where he met her, Emily Wilson, a woman he’d only spent one night with and yet he felt he knew everything about her. Seeing her at the dinner party organized for high achieving graduates, she had touched him with her naivety and guilelessness. He was an entrepreneur himself and had no need for such parties but he had gone to see if he could scout someone for his own company. Bored with the party, he left his manager, whom he had come with at their table and gone wandering. That was when he saw her, staring at her drink as if she couldn’t decide what to do with it. She was the most delightful woman he had ever seen and he felt compelled to talk to her. He had felt an instant connection and longed for her almost instantly. She couldn’t be held accountable for her actions of getting him into her bed and he should have tried harder to stop her. But he was halfway in love and more than halfway in lust already and he had yielded to her wiles. When he found out that he was her first, his heart had melted, feeling deeply for the woman beneath him. When the morning came and she was still sleeping, he was uncertain if he should wait for her reaction or not. Judging by her words the previous night, she wasn’t the type to be impulsive but she had slept with him, a stranger; there was no doubt that she would regret it and blame him when the effect of alcohol was gone. At last, he decided to save them both the trouble by leaving first. He took the first flight home that very morning.

He hadn’t been back there since that night. Both Nina and Claire suspected that something had happened when he arrived at home. Not wanting Claire to feel threatened by any lady, he always ensured to keep all his affairs with the ladies secret. His relationships were always short-lived and for sex only. So he hadn’t told her about Emily at first even though they told each other everything. But his daughter was smart and knew him like no other. She got the story out of him only a few weeks later and laughed as he told her and Nina about Emily. He knew that Claire meant that he should get married to Emily when she made him make the promise to her. The thin blonde girl he met that night never left his mind afterwards and only Claire’s death drove every thought out of his mind recently. Nina’s mention of Athens brought the memories rushing back at him despite his grief. She would long have left Georgia, he thought to himself. “I think you should go, maybe you would find her and fulfil your promise to Claire in one fell swoop.” Nina said quietly. Ryan sighed again. He knew that Nina would hassle him to death if he didn’t go. She would play on his guilt and sense of responsibility by bringing up his promise to Claire at the slightest opportunity. It seemed like he would be going to back to Athens after all.

Reunion

FIVE

August, 2016 Everything was different, yet nothing had changed. Emily looked through the window of her hotel room at the streets that were once so familiar. She had once walked through these streets as a student of Georgia. This city had been her home for four years. It had also been her place of rebirth. It was where she had done an entire about-face and become who she was today. It was where she had fallen in love with a stranger. It had taken her another three months after that night to come to the realization that she had fallen headlong in love with the mysterious, quick-to-grin Ryan Jones. She never forgot his name too. In light of the drastic change that came over her - spiky, short hair, lenses instead of glasses, a better dress sense, it was Shannon who finally declared that she had fallen in love with her mysterious one night stand such that she was making an effort to change herself into the image he suggested she did. Emily had emphatically agreed with her. If that was love that she felt that night, then she would keep it close to her heart forever. However, she hadn’t been able to experience that feeling with any other man. She had dated a couple of times in the last four years but they all seemed empty. It was like Ryan Jones had spoilt her for other men. Still best of friends, Shannon kept hooking her up with some of her husband’s colleagues (to Emily’s delight, Shannon and Greg finally tied the knot two years ago) but none ever lead to anything serious. However, Emily still hoped for the man that would sweep her off her feet (again) someday. Sighing deeply, she turned away from the window to sit on the bed. It was just morning and it was the first day of rehearsals with her models and other props. The attachment that was mailed to her as an update for the Show had informed her that she would be provided with one top brand producer (along with three other participants) three models for her designs, two makeup artistes, one photographer and an optional assistant/apprentice designer if needed. She wouldn’t be in need an assistant as she came with her own assistant designer, Marianne who was her right hand since she joined her one year ago and a great designer in the making. Emily mentally checked everything she had prepared for the Show. She ticked items on a mental list, nodding in satisfaction at each item ticked. Registering for the Show had been one of her numerous spontaneous decisions and she wanted it to go well so badly. Since she started her label right out of college, it would be the first time that she would be entering into something as big and as serious as the Show and she was just a tad nervous. She was just three years in the industry and would be showcasing her outfits against industry veterans. However, she had supreme confidence in the uniqueness of her brand and knew that she would do well with her outfits. At the very least, she thought to herself consolingly, I would be gaining international recognition. The door of her hotel room opened unceremoniously. She knew who it was before she raised her eyes to see. “Everyone is going crazy over the Show. I swear, there are more clothes here than I have seen in my entire life.” Marianne gushed, plopping on the bed beside Emily. Her assistant was a twenty-one-year-old girl, full of energy and park. She was a college drop out

of her own decision who wanted to be a designer and not some lawyer like her parents wanted her to be. What Emily liked about her, was her sharp mind and eye for detail. In the fashion industry, those two could never be amiss. She had never regretted employing the girl despite her lack of experience. “But of course, that is to be expected. This is the International Fashion Show, Marianne, you can’t help it here.” She explained to her. The organizing body had secured the biggest hotel in the city for the event where all the participants were lodged. There was a display room in place already where the bestselling outfits of previous winners of the Show were displayed and sold at ridiculously high prices. For that privilege alone, many salivated at the honor of winning at the Show. She guessed that Marianne had gone for a morning tour of the display room and was impressed at what she saw. “Head Turners will soon be sitting with those outfits.” She said confidently. Marianne’s unending boost of confidence was another reason that Emily liked the girl. She was a go-getter and was always optimistic. “I hope so.” Emily replied. They chatted about this and that for another minute before the time came for rehearsal.

********* “Emily, meet your photographer, Ryan Jones. Ryan, meet Emily Wilson.” Her producer, Jamie Langdon was a busy man and he turned away quickly to see what the other designers were up to as soon as the words left his mouth. He did not see the shocked expression that came over the faces of both Emily and Ryan as he introduced them. Emily was shocked speechless and immobile. She had been in the little room provided for her and her props all day, rehearsing with the models. She found the models and makeup artistes to her satisfaction and was making quick progress with them. However, her photographer had yet to show up and she had been worried. Each participant needed their first photographs on display first thing tomorrow morning. The other props were now on break and she was left with Marianne in the room talking about their missing photographer and what they should do if he didn’t turn up for the second session. Marianne was just suggesting that they ‘borrow’ one of the other photographers for a brief period when the producer walked in with him. “Ryan Jones, a fresh graduate of this grand school and a photographer by hobby.” It was obvious that her one-night stand had made his hobby a profession. She swallowed as she allowed her eyes to meet his. Her heart almost flew right out of her chest. His eyes were still the same brilliant shade of gold that she remembered. She had thought that the excess wine she had that night must have surely exaggerated his features in her mind and that he couldn’t be as handsome as she thought him to be. It so happened that the wine had understated his handsomeness. Ryan Wilson was looking more handsome, more masculine, more mature and more everything than she remembered in a cream, designer T shirt rolled up at the sleeves and a pair of

chocolate brown pants. He had a four o’clock shadow on his cheeks and the dimples she so much remembered and loved, showed blatantly on them. He was staring at her as if he had just seen a ghost. She figured that she must be staring at him in quite the same way. “Emily?” he asked in perplexed confusion. “Emily!” her assistant whispered, jabbing her in the side to remove her boss from her obvious paralysis. “Hi, Mr. Jones. I am Marianne, Emily’s assistant.” She said, trying to give her obviously dumbfounded boss time to recoup. The man however had eyes only for Emily. It seemed like there was a history here, Marianne thought, licking her lips in anticipation of a great love story. She was a romantic at heart. “Hi Marianne,” he glanced at her briefly before turning back to Emily. Marianne sighed at the two and crept out of the room, not that they noticed her leave anyway. It seemed like the two had a lot of catching up to do and her presence wouldn’t be required. She hoped that they would be through with whatever they had going before the next session which was to be in exactly forty-two minutes’ time. Emily saw Marianne leave from the corner of her eye but her tongue was still locked to the roof of her mouth. It was too coincidental not to mention surprising that she would be meeting with Ryan in the first time that she came back to this place after four years. “Hi Ryan,” she said at last. A small smile came across his face at her greeting. She had no idea why she thought so but she couldn’t help but think that it was the first real smile that had crossed this man’s lips in a while. Now that she was released from the initial shock, she could see that there was something sad in his eyes, the brightness in his lovely eyes were dimmed and there were crows feet in the corner of his left eye. She wondered what had happened to him since she last saw him. “Hi, Emily. I never imagined you for a fashion designer,” he said. At his words, she got her savvy, cheesy-self back and dazzled him with a smile. “Is that the only thing different you’ve noticed about me?” she asked him though her heart was still pounding hard in her chest. He walked up to where she was seated and took the chair in front of her just like he did the night they met. “You are more beautiful. Absolutely stunning,” he said, looking at her from head to toe. The former Emily Wilson would have blushed at those words but this Emily Wilson of his making, even though he might not know it, preened at the compliment. She frequently got such compliments from men but it was the first time she was actually flattered upon receiving it. “Thanks. You look dashing yourself, as expected of course.” She told him. He laughed out loud at her cliché and stopped suddenly as if the sound of his own laughter was strange to his ears.

“Thanks,” he said quietly. Something was definitely wrong with this guy, she thought. In place of the carefree young man that she met four years ago was this brooding man that seemed to carry the weight of the world on his broad shoulders. Immediately, her heart reached out to him and she sought to help him, like he helped her those years ago. “You seem to have done well for yourself,” he commented, looking around her tiny room. She also looked around the room, trying to see her hung out outfits through a stranger ’s eyes. They looked pretty good to her but then, she might still be biased despite her attempted detachment. “Yeah, I guess so. I started a fashion line right after college; Head Turners and only just entered for the Show this year.” She informed him. “Wow, that’s great. I guess you finally took that leap we talked about,” he gestured towards the room and her appearance. He looked like he was reliving that night just like she was. “I did, thanks to you.” She confirmed. He was nodding at her approvingly, comparing the new Great to the old Emily he met with that night and liking what he saw. She decided to test the waters. “I didn’t wait too long for it either; I made my first bold step the next morning when I discovered you were gone.” She said slowly, trying to gauge his reaction to her words. She wanted to believe that he had thought of her at least a little just like she had thought of him, unable to forget him or how he made her feel in the years that followed. His gaze turned to look into her eyes and her breath hitched at his eyes. Would she ever be used to his eyes staring right into hers? She wondered. “I had to leave. I didn’t want you to hate me.” He said so quietly that she almost did not catch his words. What was he saying? How could she hate him? He had given her the best night of her life! She was about to tell him exactly what was on her mind when the door opened and Michelle, one of the models walked in. She stopped short when she noticed the male company and smiled in pleasure. Emily could recognize the look that came over the girl’s face and she sighed in irritation. Ryan Jones was a handsome man and it looked like he was getting his first female admirer at the Show. It also looked like their conversation had come to an end as Michelle walked up to him and introduced herself. Emily shook her head to clear it. This wasn’t a dream, she told herself, she had indeed just seen Ryan after four long years.

********* “I am telling you Emily, you are meant to be together. You are soul mates.” Shannon told Emily over the phone.

Emily rolled her eyes at her friend’s superstitious belief. She had called to update her about the day’s happening after the second session was over. Everyone had departed and she was waiting for Ryan in her prep room to bring the photos so they could submit them to her producer, before they retired for the evening in preparation for the next day. After telling Shannon of her journey to their old location as students, she had as nonchalantly as she could, dropped Ryan’s name and explained meeting him in her prep room. Shannon had instantly latched onto the gist and started calling them all sort of names of which soulmates was most prominent. She could remember Romeo and Juliet too but she astutely ignored that one; she didn’t want Ryan to die for her. “We only just met again, Shannon.” She reminded her friend. Shannon snorted over the phone. She didn’t want to hear anything else apart from romance, weddings and love when it came to her best friend and now that the mysterious one-night stand that got her friend out of her shell was back, she knew her friend would soon have her own happily ever after. “And I can bet my unborn baby that your heart raced four miles a minute when you saw him.” She said knowingly. Her friend knew her too much. She and Greg were finally starting a family and Shannon could not string three sentences together without mentioning her unborn baby. “Well, yes.” Emily allowed. “Then, that’s it. If you are this hooked on him after four years, he surely is on you too.” She proclaimed. That was the problem. Though he still remembered her and the conversation they had four years ago, Emily was unsure of what was going on in Ryan’s mind. She didn’t know how he felt towards her. She didn’t know if he had thought about her at all in the past four years. “We don’t know that,” she said softly into the phone. “You might not but I do.” Shannon declared. “If a guy comments on the changes in you minutes only into reuniting with you after four years, it only means one thing. He hasn’t been able to forget about you. I bet you noticed the changes in him right off too.” She maintained. That much was true, Emily thought, she had looked him from head to toe looking for changes and delighting in seeing him once more. “Well, we shall soon see if your predictions are right,” she told her friend. “You will see that I am right. Hurry up both of you, will you? I will make you my baby’s godparents if you get married in time before her birth.” Shannon told her, a smile in her voice. Emily could imagine that she was rubbing her round belly as she spoke. Though the expectant mother refused to go for a scan to determine her baby’s sex despite her husband’s pleas, she would tell anyone who was willing to listen that she would be giving birth to a baby girl. “I would be honored to be her god aunt regardless.” She said into the phone, ignoring the rest of

what her friend said. “Just keep it calm, G and set the charms out on him. If he didn’t fall for you the first time, he will now.” Shannon said on a more serious note. “Thanks, hon.” She replied, loving her friend for her thoughtfulness, goodwill and encouragement. “Take care of yourself and kiss Greg for me, will you?” she said. When she hung up, she thought about what Shannon had said. Married. The words hung heavy in the air of her hotel room. She always knew that she would love to get married someday but truthfully, she never quite gave it a serious thought. For a moment, she allowed herself be carried away with her thoughts. It seemed that was what she was doing most these days; thinking. She imagined being married to Ryan. What would it be like? She asked herself. She had no idea. It was strange that she could be in love with a man without knowing anything about him except the way he made her feel. She didn’t even know what course he studied in the college before graduating. As well, he appeared to have changed since she saw him. She had changed too but in the direction that he was able to convince her was best for her. The reverse seemed to be the case for him if the lines in the corners of his eye were any indication. Throughout the photoshoot that followed their conversation, his eyes had been sad as if he had suffered a recent and very painful loss. She was reminded of how she had lived after her parent’s death. She made up her mind to find out what ailed him. Just like he helped her, she would help him too. If that was the only thing she could achieve from their unprecedented reunion, she would gladly take it and soar with it.

SIX

Ryan was still finding it hard to believe that he had just met found Emily Wilson after all this time. He had initially chickened out at the last minute and missed his scheduled flight for the previous day. However, Nina had not let him have a moment rest all through the night and he had taken the next available flight today which made him miss the first shoot. He had more than made up for it with the second shoot and everyone was pleased with the results. However, he was still amazed that he was working with Emily, of all designers there were in the world. “And she had changed so much too, damn it.” He muttered to himself. She had been a beauty in her black shiny dress the night he saw her but now, she was simply gorgeous. He wondered when she cut her long blonde hair and began to wear the short, spikes he saw on her head this afternoon. It made her look chic, fashionable and savvy. She was now a career lady too as he could see by the professional way she handled her models. And her outfits; those were simply amazing. They were indeed the head turners that she labelled her brand. Even the models found it hard to shed the clothes after the shoot, seeing how well the cloth made them look on camera. Emily Wilson had taken the leap and was obviously enjoying her new found self. He was happy for her, there was no sense living in the past. Like you are doing right now? A tiny voice taunted him in his head. He refused to acknowledge the voice as another pain stabbed his heart like it did when he remembered Claire. He was here because she would wanted him to be and to his greatest surprise; he had met Emily here again. Perhaps, Claire was watching over him from heaven like she said she would. He smiled at the thought of his Claire as an angel in heaven, asking God to watch over her da and bring him a woman to marry so she would have siblings. She would make the cutest angel, his Claire. As he made his way back into the prep room he vacated a while ago, he wondered if she was married now or was in a serious relationship. He supposed he would find out over the course of the Show. In the meantime, he would just busy himself with work and trying to draw breath each day. With time perhaps, he would learn to stop thinking of going home to Claire, hearing her sweet baby voice and checking on her to see if she was alright when he was away. He knew he was in for the most difficult task of his life but he had made a promise. He wouldn’t disrepect Claire’s memory by not being true to his words, he promised himself. He entered the prep room and saw Emily sitting by one of the table mirrors in the room. She was wearing a sleeveless frilly laced magenta blouse over a pair of yellow pants. On anyone else, the combination of colors might have looked odd, but not on her; it fitted her perfectly, showing off her trim curves and slender stature. She carried herself well in it too as she went round, fitting her models and encouraging them to work with her. Her blue eyes were gentle and compassionate and he had felt them on him as he worked; just like they were fastened on him right now. All thoughts flew from his head as he walked into the room, holding her gaze. It was like no time had passed at all as he reached her. He was momentarily thrown back in time to four years ago in her apartment when he entered and she had kissed him on the mouth. His heart had done a little jiggle as

an electric current ran through it. He hadn’t known what hit him, he was entirely lost to her in that instant. He looked down at her now and knew that his feelings for her were still as strong as it was that first night. “Was that even possible? It had been four years”, he said to himself. He knew what he was feeling and they were as real as the stunning lady sitting in front of him. “Erm,” he cleared his throat, “I have the photos.” He said lamely. She shook her head as if to clear it and looked at his hands. “Yes, I can see that you do.” She said with a small smile. He dropped the envelope in his hands on the dresser in front of her and dragged a nearby chair to sit beside her. Her gaze continued to rest on him for a while and he stared at her with a confused smile. He didn’t understand the look she gave him. If he were to hazard a guess, he would say she was trying to figure him out. However, the look was gone as she took the envelope and began to remove the photographs within. She looked pretty impressed with each picture she was seeing and a broad smile came over her face. “I think I was given the best photographer at the Show,” she murmured, still looking at the pictures. He did not reply but took the opportunity to study her as she was studying the pictures from various angles. She looked more serene, confident and in charge than when he left her in her bed four years ago. He was not surprised, creating such delightful outfits as she does must have really earned her the trust and confidence of her clients that would have boosted her own confidence in return. “What do you think? I can’t seem to decide whether I should use Nora or Michelle’s picture as the background for my banner tomorrow,” she said suddenly. As her own unique way of expressing her brand, she had thought of making a large printout of her favorite model and using it as a background to her collections during the Show. When she told him during the shoot, he had praised her idea effusively, saying it was going to wow the judges, he had meant every word of it. It was a smart idea and he admired her cleverness. He leaned over to view both pictures that she held in each hand. He looked at each critically for some seconds before speaking. He knew that this Show was important to her and she wanted everything to go perfectly. “I think you should use Michelle’s,” he decided. “The little frock looks fabulous on her, making her look totally innocent but the smoky look in her eyes tells another story entirely. Your audience and the judges will be thrilled,” He explained. Instead of agreeing with him like he expected, Emily was staring at him suspiciously. He raised his eyebrows at her in silent inquisition. “It seems you are tripping for my favorite model already. It seems she likes you too judging from the way she was all over you when she came in from break.” She said teasingly. Who? He almost asked. If there was anyone he was tripping for, she was sitting right here, next to

him but he didn’t need to let her know that. Not yet anyway. “She’s way too young for me.” He told her. She smiled as if pleased with him for his response. “What is your definition of ‘too young’?” she asked him, her index and middle fingers coming up in a gesture of quotes at the last words. “She is eighteen and you are?” she came up short. “Twenty-eight,” he supplied, “too old for her.” he emphasized with a shudder. She threw back her head and burst out in a loud throaty laugh that filled his senses deliciously at the sound. He watched her throat as she laughed and felt like setting his lips on it to feel the vibration of her laughter. She caught him smiling and staring at her. “You are not so old yourself. I know lovers and couples with a bigger age gap so you needn’t look so put off at the idea.” She said turning back to the pictures. After a moment, her head snapped up as if she just remembered something. “I never asked if you ever got married,” she said. He shook his head no. “You?” he asked. “No,” she said, giving him another brilliant smile that made him feel good on the inside. She went back to the pictures again and he continued to watch her as she set aside Michelle’s picture to be used as the background she wanted. He had printed two of each picture; one of each would be submitted to the organizing body and she would keep each other one in a catalog. If there were to be request for more of the pictures say by a sponsor or potential client, they would have to be paid for. She neatly separated the pictures, putting them off into separate envelopes. Claire would have loved her, he thought sadly. At that moment, she looked up at him about to say something. He quickly tried to smile but the words she was about to utter died on her lips on whatever she saw in his eyes because she only stared into his eyes for some seconds before talking to him. “What happened to you, Ryan? How have you been since all these years?” she said softly. He was amazed at her power of perception. The only other people who could see him just by looking into his eyes, were Claire and Nina. The thought of his daughter sent him into a fresh wave of pain and he closed his eyes. He felt Emily’s hands on his’ and he opened his eyes. “Ttalk to me, please.” She pleaded with him. She was staring up at him softly and the look was almost his undoing. However, he did not want to spoil her first day in the Show with his tale of woes. “It’s nothing that a good night rest won’t fix.” He said evasively and standing up. He felt a loss so intense when her warm hands slid out of his. She gave a disappointed sigh but smiled up at him. “I will still be willing to listen any time you wish to talk.” She told him quietly.

He nodded and made to leave. “I will have the banner ready first thing tomorrow morning,” he said. She nodded and watched him go. With each step he took, he felt like running back to her but he told himself to walk on. He did not stop until he reached the room he had been shown to earlier in the day. He fell on the bed in exhaustion, promptly falling asleep. He slept all through the evening and into the night. He didn’t remember that he had had nothing to eat all day.

********* The next day, Emily was too busy to think of anything else but the Show. At first, because she was an unknown name in the industry, her stand was empty but the giant banner behind her stand finally did the trick when one distinguished looking lady noticed and came over. “I love what she is wearing,” she said, pointing at Michelle’s picture with her sunshades. She was Antonia West, a popular novelist. Emily had even read one of her thriller series and was just thrilled by her visit to her stand. From there, it was smooth sailing for ‘Head Turners.” Several people came over to check her outfits and she became busy attending to them. She barely had time to stop for a quick bite when it was time for lunch. By evening, she was almost falling on her feet but her success had given her an adrenalin rush. She didn’t see Ryan all through the day. The next day was another photo shoot so she met him at her door bright and early when she stepped out of her room. They stood still, staring at each other for long seconds. “Good morning,” he greeted. “You staying on my floor?” she asked at the same time. He smiled and nodded in response. She murmured her good morning, smiling sheepishly. “I didn’t see you all day yesterday,” she accused him. “I was in my room most of the time since my attention was not needed, I only came out for dinner and you were gone by then,” he said as way of explanation. It was her turn to nod. They walked together to the prep room and she filled him in on her success the previous day. “I am really happy for you, Emily. You have made a great head start,” he said genuinely. Throughout the day, they worked side by side. Incidentally or not, Emily wasn’t sure which but it seemed that their hands were always touching as he set one model in the perfect position and she adjusted the model’s outfit. Their eyes frequently met and even Marianne commented about it during break. “Our photographer is obviously as into you as you are into him.” The girl said to her over a

carton of juice and hot dogs. Emily almost spit out her hot dog. It was that obvious? “Yeah, it’s very obvious that you have or used to have a thing going.” Marianne replied as if she had asked the question out loud. “Why do you think Michelle laid off? It was because she saw the sizzling attraction between you two and didn’t want to get burnt by intruding,” she said with a dazzling smile and a wink. Emily decided to come out with it all. “Tell me, am I the only one or do you think he is into me too?” she asked the girl. She could do with a little help here. “Really, you need to ask that?” the girl snickered. “Anybody with eyes in his skull would notice the hot looks he gives you from miles off,” Marianne replied, fanning her face with her hands. Emily smiled. Marianne had just unwittingly helped her to make a hard and fast decision. Ryan might have the biggest chip on his shoulder and try to brush her off with his macho attitude but she wouldn’t give him the chance to. Not anymore. Like Shannon said, she was going to turn the charms on and see if he would be able to resist. He hadn’t been able to four years ago. She doubted he would this time either.

SEVEN



Finally, the Show was drawing to an end. The past four days had been crazy for Emily, what with shuffling between trying to seduce Ryan and running her show. Thankfully, her participation in the Show was unanimously declared a roaring success by all and she couldn’t be happier at her performance. She wished she had had as much success with Ryan. Her seduction of Ryan was going at a snail pace and she didn’t like it one tiny bit. He was way too cautious for her, fighting her temptations and generally frustrating her. It was the Show’s dinner party tonight where awards would be given to the most outstanding designers of the Show. She should be worried, thinking about the dinner but she couldn’t seem to summon the energy to worry about it. Her mind was occupied with thoughts of Ryan. Though he seemed to open up a little more each day, she still seemed so sad. His smiles did not reach his eyes like she remembered and he couldn’t seem to laugh out loud any more. To Emily, it was as if someone had taken the sunshine out of his life. She had no idea how right she actually was. She had carefully chosen her outfit for this dinner. The dress was spread out on her bed and she looked at it, checking it out from various angles. It will do, she thought resolutely. Just like the last time, she was going to bring Ryan to her room and have mind blowing sex with him. She had it all planned out already. Her revealing dress was the mastermind and he wouldn’t know what hit him by the time she was through with him. She labelled the dress ‘The Heart throb.’ When she finished dressing, she observed her reflection in the mirror. It was an A-shaped, sunshine yellow dress that curved flagrantly from hip to thighs; sleeveless and with a padded bust. There was no need for a bra and it pushed up her breasts in the most delicious way. The catchy part of the dress was the jagged slit that ran from the hem up her thigh to reveal her milk white thighs. The cut was intentionally uneven and patterned with net lace that swished as she walked. A four layered bead necklace fanned across her bust, completing her attire. She was set for war. The dress was originally sewn for the final show tonight; she had kept it hidden for the runway show to be held at the dinner but in light of Ryan’s obstinacy, she decided to wear it for herself. She would have to hope that her success in the past four days was enough to get her a few mentions of honor if not an award. She left the room and went up to Ryan’s to knock on his door. The door was opened shortly to reveal the most handsome man she had ever seen. This guy sure knew how to steal a lady’s breath away, she thought, mentally fanning herself with her hands. Since it was a specified formal affair this time around, he had no excuse not to appear in a suit. But didn’t the suit look just perfect on him? He wore the three-piece suit with such elegance that she couldn’t stop staring at him. The suit pants were coral blue, placed on top of a white shirt and sapphire jacket. His tie was dotted in various shades of blue and he was looking downright yummy. She smacked her lips loudly.

“You look like a delicious scoop of strawberry ice cream, it is my favorite,” she informed him. He smiled absently at her remark. It was then that she noticed that he was busy admiring her too. She felt hot and cold at the same time; the look in his eyes there and then could cause a small heat wave. “And you look like the Apple in the Garden of Eden,” he said on a raw whisper. Her gaze flew to his and she saw the raw desire in them. It was like he was fighting a battle with himself. For the umpteenth time, she wondered what ghosts were disturbing this man so. She briefly thought of seducing him right there and then, but she knew he would blame himself afterwards if they missed the dinner and awards ceremony. With effort, she restrained the desire curling in her belly. There would be time to play later, she consoled herself. “Thank you, kind sir.” She said and made a mock curtsy, tipping forward. Ryan swallowed hard. Her little curtsy had almost popped her breasts out of the dress and she was glad that he was unaffected by the sight. He couldn’t stop staring at her bosom. Who said she couldn’t play now? She thought delightedly. Holding out her hand, she asked him, “ready?” He nodded, took her hand and walked her to the venue for the dinner. She felt like she was floating and by the time they made their entrance, she was feeling like Cinderella at the ball. She could only hope that she would not turn into a maid by the time the hour struck. They were easily the focus of much attention as she wouldn’t let Ryan be on his own for one second. She used her eyes and all the body language she knew to tell him what she intended for him tonight. He was not unreceptive of her charms. At one point, he grabbed her hand as she ‘accidentally’ brushed against his thigh underneath the table. “Emily,” he said through gritted teeth. She only smiled at him and continued to eat her food. It was time for the awards and a hush fell over the room. Anticipation was heavy in the air as everyone thought of who would win which award. Emily was momentarily distracted by thoughts of the awards and focused on their host as he summoned the judges to give their verdicts. She felt Ryan’s eyes on her as he lent her his support. He was doing it again, she thought briefly; supportive without a word. A number of awards were called out and she didn’t hear her name or brand. It was after all her very first entry and she was just about to give up when the judge called yet another. “This award is a new one but then, the winner of the award is a new one too. For creativity in style and design, for uniqueness of ideas and general craziness of fashion sense, an award is given to Miss Wilson of ‘Head Turners.’ If you are looking for trendy, crazy, fun, smart and unique, I will personally recommend her,” the judge said amidst a resounding round of applause. Emily looked at Ryan with tears in her eyes. She wasn’t in the room anymore. Instead, she was in another dinner party, similar but yet so different. She was transported back in time to four years ago

when Ryan had asked her the question that triggered today’s award. What would your parent have you do? Emily, your parents’ death should have taught you the most vital of lessons; life is short and you have to live it to the fullest. Aim high, shoot higher; go for your dreams; scream with friends; make yourself happy. It is the only way to live. Ryan had motivated her. She was grateful to this man in more ways than one. Bringing herself to the present, she stood up and walked up to the stage to receive her award. There was no going back, she was determined to have Ryan in her life whether he wanted her or not. She could tell that he wanted her but he was holding back. She was going to break those barriers, she promised herself as she received the award, dedicating it to him.

********* “I want to know more about you, Ryan.” Emily had said to him as they left the dinner hall. It was way past midnight already and he had a half mind to tell her off again but he wanted her company. Hell, he craved her company. Her little antics all night long got him so hot and bothered that it was all he could do not to drag her to his room with everybody watching. Finally, when the party was over, she had made the statement about wanting to know more about him and his final resolve to stay away from her melted away. Together, they had gone up to her room and were now sharing a bottle of wine on the floor. “I am the only son of Tate Jones,” he started. Her eyes widened. “The Tate Jones? The politician?” She was staring at him unbelievably but he only nodded. Few people believed him whenever he was compelled to say it out loud. As rich and powerful as his father was, he wasn’t the epitome of the best father or even the best citizen. “You must have heard of the scandal that sent him to prison for life?” he asked. She nodded her head. “I heard but I don’t know the details. I wasn’t big into news then,” she told him, urging him on with her expressive blue eyes. “My father was not the normal father every child had. He was focused on only one thing in his life; his political career and power. I learned to accept him for who he was and ignore him most of the time just like I ignored his affairs with under aged girls.” There, Emily’s eyes went as round as saucers but she did not utter a word, she drew closer to him and curled into his arms, looking up at him. He was encouraged to continue despite the pain of reliving those years ago. “They always came and went so I didn’t allow myself to think much of it. Until he raped our

sixteen-year-old maid when I was sixteen and got her pregnant. When she wouldn’t get rid of the baby, he attempted to poison her and the baby and when that did not work fast enough, he tried to kill her with his own hands. I caught him in the act and called the police. My testimony sent him to jail forever.” He said the last as if he was confessing his guilt to a clergy and Emily held him tightly. “I am so sorry, so sorry.” She was sobbing into his shirt, crying for him. She hadn’t heard the most of it. It was the first time he had talked to anybody about those days twelve years ago and he felt lighter already for sharing it with her. Emily was listening to Ryan with her heart instead of her ears. She felt sympathy for the young boy that he had been, who lost his youth to the events that forever shaped his future. She couldn’t believe that he had gone through so much. The loss of her parents was nothing compared to his experience. “Jasmine, our maid was almost dead by the time help got to her.” he continued. “She was hospitalized for the whole of her term. My father ’s case was in court by then and I switch between the police station, the hospital to see Jasmine. As if to thwart me, Jasmine didn’t carry up to term but gave birth to the cutest baby in the universe after which she died. It was the most gruesome seven hours of my life but it was worth it. I named her Claire.” He said the last part with pride and she had no doubt that he had loved the girl that was born of his woes. She smiled her pride at him. “With my father gone, I was an unwilling father by seventeen but I had Claire and for her sake, I quickly learnt to be responsible. My father had put his manager in charge of his businesses and I learned the business from him only to discover that my heart was not into it. My baby was the one who discovered that I loved photography and encouraged me to go for it,” he said with a fond smile. Emily’s tears dried at the happy turn of the story. She wondered how a seventeen-year-old had coped with a baby but Ryan obviously did. He spoke of ‘his Claire’ in such fond terms that she wanted to meet the girl. Claire would be around eleven by now, she quickly calculated. “Me and Claire, we were all we had for the longest time. I lived for her, she saved me from descending into a pit of darkness that would have swallowed me forever. She was light and she taught me to play in the sunshine once again. She died forty-five days, three hours and sixteen minutes ago.” Emily leaned out of his chest. She didn’t know what to say. Now she understood the forlorn look in his eyes. The sunshine had indeed been removed from his life. The drying tears welled up in her eyes again and she was not even aware when they began to fall. Ryan was crying too. “What…?” she couldn’t complete the question. “She was weak from birth, Down syndrome.” He explained with tears in his eyes, correctly guessing her question. There was absolutely no telling the pain that Ryan must have been through. To have never loved or been loved was not new to him but he had found love in the eyes of a little girl and lost it. She bawled like a baby, she would have curled up and died if it were her. She simply wouldn’t have been able to survive the painful experience. This man was strong for someone so young. How the hell did he draw breath after his daughter’s death? She couldn’t think, she just went into his arms again, simply holding him and crying with him. It galled her that it was all she could do for him but she knew that

there was nothing more to be done. She could however feel a huge relief drop from his shoulders. “The little imp made me promise her something before she died.” He said after the tears subsided. “What?” she asked. He was looking into her eyes now. “To come back to you.” He said softly. Emily was surprised. “She knew of me?” she asked. He nodded. “I told her. She rightly guessed that I had fallen in love and wanted me to be happy.” “Did you know you would meet me here?” she asked suddenly. He shook his head. “Nina, our nurse encouraged me to come ‘right’ myself by doing what I loved first before I go searching for you. She had no idea that I would be killing two birds with one stone.” They fell silent after this confession. Emily wished she could have met Claire at least one time before her death. “Was she the reason you left me that night? You didn’t want to share her love?” she asked after a while. “No, it was basically my own cowardice just like my cowardice keeps me from you after we meet again four years after. I thought you would hate me in the light of the morning.” He explained after thinking of her question. “Claire would have loved you.” He added. Emily nodded her head and rested her cheek against his chest. Her head snapped up as something that only just hit her. “You said you fell in love with me? On that night?” she asked him, eyes wide. “I was hoping you didn’t hear that part,” he replied, a small smile on his lips. The smile almost distracted her; she was happy that there was something for him to smile about. “And now?” she insisted. The smile became broader. “What’s there not to love? You are gorgeous, sexy, smart, creative and cried for my baby even though you never met her.” he said both sadly and sweetly. Her heart went out to him. He had her from day one, he only did not know it. She suddenly wished they had been together these last four years. She would have shared his joys and pains with him. He wouldn’t have had to bear it all alone. She leaned out of his arms to stare deep into his eyes. Before she replied, she leaned upward and smashed her lips against his, daring him to stop her. He didn’t. Slowly, she plastered her chest on his and slid to sit on his lap. He moaned into her mouth, surprised and pleased at the same time. Emily reached for his palm and guided it to the naked flesh of her thighs. His hand was warm and soft and it aroused her. She could feel a very sensitive warmth between her thighs. Eventually, when both of them broke the kiss with a gasp, Emily held her breath and spoke from her heart.

“I love you too and I will like to be with you from this moment onward. I will not be able to fill the void that Claire left in your heart, I do not aim to but I want to make you happy once again. I want to wipe the hurt from your eyes and see the grin easily slide up your face like four years ago. Please let me,” she told him all this, begging him with her eyes. His gold eyes were staring into hers too. There was unshaken love and raw hunger for her in them. “I want to, Lord help me, I want to be with you too.” He said on a ragged whisper. It was all she needed. She placed a finger on his lips and kissed him again. Ryan reacted too this time around; he moved his palm from her thigh upward, towards her ass. He dragged her closer and gasped into her mouth, professing the romance that was going to envelope both of them for the next hour – for the rest of their lives. Ryan might have changed because of the struggles in his past but at least, his fingers still set her skin on fire, Emily thought. As she circled his waist with her lap, his palm slowly left her ass and travelled to the opening of her pussy. He brushed her panties aside and quickly slid in two fingers, making her breathless. “My Emily?” He moaned into her mouth. “Still so tight.” Emily ignored him. It was the same way that she was going to ignore the slow movements of his second hand to her bra strap afterwards and the way his lips left hers and gradually went down to the soft mound of her breasts. She was going to ignore the fact that everything that he was doing brought back memories of what they had started four years ago. It created an enthralling memory of what was to begin. He was suckling her nipples remorselessly as if he had dreamt of nothing but doing so in the past four years. Afterwards, he gently raised her above his thigh and freed his cock through the zipper of his shorts. He was big. He was ready for her. Emily had been ready to have him inside her again for the past four years. She closed her eyes as he raised her to sit on his cock. It slid in easily, with her pussy tightening ecstatically around it, craving for more. He didn’t guide her, he didn’t pull her up, but Emily began to move. She began to ride his cock so fast that she thought that her heart could fail her any time. Yes, Emily decided that she was going to ignore every sensation that told her to ignore the way he made her feel. She was going to ignore the sudden rush that she felt any time that she was with him. Emily had decided. This man was going to have good memories from now on or she was going to die trying.



THE END

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