In The Moment - Alison G. Bailey(ang.)

In The Moment Copyright © 2016 Alison G. Bailey All rights reserved. Ebook ISBN: 978-0-9914744-9-3 Interior book design by Angela McLaurin, Fictional Formats Edited by Christine Estevez Cover design by Murphy Rae Hopkins, Indie Solutions Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of the above author of this book. This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, brands, media, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead, locales, or events is entirely coincidental. LITERARY AND FILM RIGHTS MANAGMENT Alison G. Bailey is represented by Bookcase Literary Agency Film and Foreign Rights Flavia Viotti

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Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four Chapter Five Chapter Six

Chapter Seven Chapter Eight Chapter Nine Chapter Ten Chapter Eleven Chapter Twelve Chapter Thirteen Chapter Fourteen Acknowledgements About the Author

STARING AT THE two black suitcases evoked no emotion in me whatsoever. A normal person would feel something watching their twelve-year relationship pack up and walk out the door. But not me. The last time I felt any sense of normalcy was

that moment, two years ago, before I discovered the lump in my right breast. It didn’t matter how much distance I gained from that day, the memory was as vivid as if it had taken place yesterday. With each pass of my hand, I applied more pressure. My fingers dug into the area several times before I allowed my brain to register the sizable mass. Standing in the shower frozen, I let the hot water pelt my numb skin and tried to think of every logical reason why this couldn’t be breast cancer. I was only thirty eight years old with no immediate family history of any type of cancers. I ate healthy, exercised, and got yearly checkups. When the official diagnosis came down, the doctors put a plan quickly in motion. For the first four months, they pumped seven different highly

toxic drugs every three weeks into my body for six cycles. The chemo wasted no time stripping away my femininity. Each morning more of my honey blonde hair clung to my pillow. My eyebrows, lashes, and nails vanished, leaving me looking and feeling like a grotesque alien creature. I avoided the mirror at all cost. But on those occasions, when I caught my reflection, my lungs gripped my breath, and I wondered where Cadence Fletcher was. After chemo, a lumpectomy followed. The doctors kept saying how lucky I was that the tumor was contained and hadn’t spread throughout my entire breast. My brain understood I was fortunate. But in my heart and soul, it was hard to count my blessings while bent over a toilet puking my guts out. I did my best to exude a positive attitude in public, waiting until I was tucked away safe and

alone in my bathroom before letting the sobs take over my body, my heart, and my spirit. One month of radiation was up next on the menu. The treatments were quick and painless. The worst part was the meltdown I had when my breast turned completely black. I expected the side effect but to see firsthand a part of my body change color right before my eyes was a total mind fuck. Fortunately, the darkness faded after a month, and my skin returned to its normal pale color. The toll the disease had taken on my relationship with Michael was slow and steady. So much so, that once I noticed there was really no turning back. But like a champ, Michael was by my side every step of the way. During times of depression, he worked hard to lift my spirits. When I had little to no appetite, he’d go to the ends

of the earth to find something that my stomach wouldn’t reject. He was an attentive boyfriend. Unfortunately, somewhere along the way the boy disappeared and all that remained was a caring friend. He no longer saw me as the woman he’d been in love with. I’d become more of an obligation in his eyes. I didn’t fault him in the least. I wasn’t the woman he met and fell in love with anymore. And as much as I wanted her to return, I knew she wouldn’t. For the past year, we tried to repair and reconnect our relationship. Once I felt well enough, I went back to my job as a financial analyst at the bank and began the process of reentering the land of the living. Michael and I made a point to schedule date nights and even took a couple of weekend getaways in hopes of

rekindling our hearts and bodies. Like any long-term relationship, we’d had our peaks and valleys. Before my diagnosis, affection between us had waned. After all, we weren’t kids anymore. Plus, we both had careers that we loved, me with the bank, and Michael with his architecture firm. But we still managed to have a good sex life. Then my diagnosis hit leaving me with no desire and a vagina that was drier than the Mojave Desert. Toss in my less than sexy appearance and you got yourself one limp sausage biscuit. We made attempts to make things work. We figured going through the motions would cause nature to kick in and take its course, eventually. At first, sex was just too painful for me physically and then became too painful emotionally. Our last-ditch effort was on the advice of my

doctor, who suggested lubing up with a coat of good old fashion Crisco. We were both willing to try anything at that point. But the faster Michael pushed into me, the more my mind drifted to visions of golden fried chicken. Then mashed potatoes and coleslaw. By the time Colonel Sanders popped in my head my stomach was growling and the mood was shot to hell. So last week after celebrating my one year anniversary of being cancer free, the man I thought I’d spend the rest of my life with and I agreed to cut the cord. Heavy footsteps on the hardwood floor snapped me into the present. Looking up, I was met by sad green eyes. Even though the breakup was mutually agreed upon, saying goodbye to the person who’d been in your life for so many years was difficult. At least it should be if you had an

ounce of emotional energy left, which I didn’t. But I attempted to convey just as much heartache in my eyes as Michael. The last thing I wanted to do was humiliate him by showing how devoid of emotion I really was; he deserved better than that. “I guess that’s it,” he said, giving me a faint smile. Michael had rented an apartment closer to his firm and had been moving boxes over there all week. “Just let me know if you think of anything else you want or need.” “Caddie, are you sure about this?” “We’re both sure about this.” His jaw clenched as he rubbed the back of his neck. “I know, but it feels weird walking away from you.”

I stepped toward him and cupped the side of his face. “You’re not walking away. We’re letting each other go. You’re a good man, Michael. You deserve to be happy.” “I care about what happens to you.” “Same here.” “Is it okay if I call sometime?” “I’d hunt you down and kick your ass if you didn’t.” He pressed his lips to my forehead. “Take care of yourself, Caddie.” I wrapped my arms around his waist, giving him a slight squeeze. Picking up his suitcases, Michael and I exchanged one last smile before we finally said goodbye to us.

“THE PAPERCLIP INDUSTRY has come a long way. A lot of people still think the clips only function is to hold paper together. But they’re sadly mistaken.” I was sitting in a nice French restaurant across

from Stan Krieger, the self-proclaimed paperclip king of the southeast. My best friend and coworker, Grace, was sitting to my right, staring at her date, Norm Nixon. I wasn’t sure what Norm’s claim to fame was because he’d not said a word since introducing himself. It had been a month since Michael had moved out and Grace thought it was about time I stuck my toe back into the dating pool. I couldn’t have agreed with her less. Without my knowledge, she had set up my profile on an online dating site. During a drunken girl’s night at my condo, she clicked on Stan and then Norm’s profile. After several blurry emails negotiating the terms, I ended up in this nightmare of a double blind date. With my eyebrows raised, I turned to Grace. “Did you hear that, Grace? They’re not only used

for holding paper together.” “Oh, I heard it and find it utterly fascinating.” Fortunately, her snarky comment was tempered by her British accent. Stan’s beady eyes lit up with excitement. “Oh yeah. Say, the hem of your dress or pants comes unraveled. Just slide a paperclip over it, and no one will be the wiser. They also work well for missing buttons or cufflinks. The young people love to wear them in piercings. You can pick a lock with them. And ever since the whole Fifty Shades craze…” He leaned forward as if he were going to tell me a secret. “They make fantastic nipple clamps.” A smarmy smile crept across his thin lips as he sat back, rubbed his nipples with the tips of his fingers, and tossed me a wink. At first, I thought it was my imagination. Surely

this grown man was not feeling himself up in front of me. I blinked a few times hoping to clear the visual. Nope. He was, in fact, rubbing his nipples. “Will you excuse me?” I pushed away from the table. “Grace, ladies room.” “Right behind you,” she said. I didn’t even bother checking the stalls to see if anyone else was in the bathroom before turning on my heels to face my giggling friend. “It’s not funny.” I snapped. “Oh come on. It’s a little bit funny.” “The only reason I agreed to this is because of you. I know your heart is in the right place, and you’re trying to help me. But I can’t do this. I’m not ready.” “You’re not going to get ready sitting in your office or home alone. I admit our first venture into

online dating did not produce top-notch candidates, but there are plenty of fish in the sea.” “It doesn’t matter. I don’t belong here.” Grace grabbed my shoulders and looked me in the eye. “You are smart, charming, and sexy as hell.” “I feel as if I have a giant letter C hovering above me. Like everyone can tell that I’ve been sick.” I’d always been fairly secure in my five foot seven, curvy frame. But cancer had turned me into an asexual creature for the last two years. Not being able to keep anything down during treatment and then not having a big appetite even a year after irrevocably changed my appearance. No matter the clothes I had on, how I wore my hair, or the number of compliments I got, when I looked in the

mirror, I saw the chemo ghost looking back. My hair had grown back but with more gray and no curls. I hated it. After Chad, my hairdresser, worked his magic, I looked less like an old lady. He covered up the overabundance of gray, cutting lots of layers through the short style, ala Meg Ryan. Since my closet contained mostly work clothes, yoga pants, and T-shirts, Grace came over earlier and did a makeover. She made a stab at getting me to wear something more form-fitting but in the end didn’t push. I felt comfortable and covered up in the sage green, short sleeve maxi dress she’d brought over. Fortunately, I had a pair of beige sandals and chunky jewelry to complete the outfit. Once Grace applied my light makeup and styled my hair into what she called a sexy messy do, I had a Bohemian thing happening.

“Let’s get out of here. There’s a dance club a block away. We can slip out and be looking at hot people grinding against one another before Nips and Mute clue in.” “Let’s just go back to my place. I have popcorn and wine.” “We’ll only go for a few drinks and get lost in a crowd of strangers for a little while.” “I don’t know.” “Come on. I haven’t been to a dance club in ages,” she whined, tugging at my arm. “Give me one good reason why we shouldn’t go.” “Because we’re both forty years old.” “If you don’t go with me, then I’ll be forced to tell Stan how hot it would make you to run your fingers through his comb-over while he recites the history of the paperclip.”

I shudder with horror. “Alright, I’ll go but only for an hour.” Clapping her hands, Grace bounced up and down. “Oh, goody!” We were able to slip past our dates and out the door without being detected. At first, I felt guilty for ditching the guys. Then suddenly the image of my fingers in Stan’s two strands of hair entered my brain and knocked the guilt right out of me.

ARM IN ARM, Grace and I made our way down the street toward the big neon green sign glowing with The Mynt. The closer the club got, the sweatier my palms got, and the tighter my chest got. I prayed Grace

kept her promise and didn’t try to make something happen for me with a complete stranger. I had to do things in my own time. “Now remember, once we go through those doors we’re no longer Grace and Caddie, financial analysts who work at TransSouth National Bank.” “Then who are we?” “We’re Francesca and… um… Isabella, two wealthy European heiresses in the states to cut a ribbon or break a bottle of champagne on a ship.” Narrowing my eyes, I glanced at her. “You should have never had that second glass of wine at dinner.” My pounding heart synced with the deep base of the loud music as it vibrated onto the sidewalk each time the club entrance swung open. Millennials lined up, waiting for the signal that

they were deemed worthy to pass through the velvet rope. Grace and I were going to stick out like a couple of sore old thumbs among this crowd. There was no way we were getting in this place. The line moved quickly and before I knew it Grace and I were at the head of it being waved in by a wall of muscles. I stepped toward the entrance and froze. Young bodies eager to get inside jostled me as they passed. From behind, a pair of hands gripped my upper arms as Grace pushed me forward into the great unknown. Flashing multi-colored strobe lights hit my eyes immediately, causing them to remain in squint mode while Grace guided me further inside. As we weaved through the sea of bodies, “Close” by Nick Jonas filled the air. I didn’t know what shocked me more, that I recognized the song or that I had

actually let Grace talk me into coming here. Between the lights, the loud music, and the grinding bodies, I almost collapsed from sensory overload. I needed a drink, and I needed it quick. From what I could see through my partially closed eyes the club had four bars. We headed to the one that stretched the length of the back wall. The lighting was dim but not seizure inducing, so my eyes were able to adjust and stay open. “Two Fireball shots!” Grace said, as she leaned toward the bar. Within seconds a pair of tattooed arms placed the amber liquid in front of us “Here ya go, ladies.” Reaching in my small cross body purse, I grabbed my debit card and placed it on the bar. “I’ve got these.”

Waving me off, Grace said, “Put that away.” She turned to the buff bartender. “Run a tab, hon.” He flashed her a big smile and a wink before walking away. Grace held up her shot glass. “It’ll take the edge off.” Mimicking her, I raised my glass. “Cheers!” The second the whisky hit the back of my throat a shiver ran down my spine. Another shot appeared as if by magic. The combination of the two shots and the two glasses of wine from earlier had given me a nice case of the fuzzies. Grace turned facing the crowd. “It looks like a cluster fuck.” “I don’t think you’re using the term correctly.” “Well, they’re all clustered together and look like they’re fucking. I just hope neither of us got

pregnant walking through that.” Laughter, as well as a hiccup, flew out of me. “Yay, Caddie’s having fun.” “Thank you for dragging me here.” “It’s the least I could do after Stan-Stan the nipple man.” Grace whipped back around, threw up her hand, and ordered us two more shots. I turned away from the bar and scanned the room. Everyone looked firm and gorgeous. Most appeared to be in their twenties. Realizing I was old enough to be the mother of any one of the party people was all it took for my insecurities to kick back in. “Grace, I think we should go.” She handed me a third shot. “We just got here.” Raising her glass, she recited, “Here’s to me!

Here’s to you! Here’s to the guys we fuck and screw!” In unison, we tossed the drinks back. Grace slammed her glass down on the bar and announced, “Time for a real drink!” As I turned back to face the bar, the bartender placed a bright green drink in front of me. I glanced up at the beautiful brunette in a pair of booty shorts and tight T-shirt with The Mynt scrolled across her big chest. Leaning in, I said, “I didn’t order this.” “The guy at the end of the bar did.” Grace waggled her eyebrows at me. “Then you need to give it to him.” A look of confusion crossed the girl’s face. “He ordered it for you.” Looking down toward the end of the bar, I tried

to decipher who the mystery man was. Grace pointed at my drink. “I’ll have one of those!” Turning to me, she said, “God, we haven’t been here a half hour, and already guys are sending drinks.” I stared down at the glowing concoction. “I can’t accept this.” “Why not?” “Don’t you know you’re not supposed to accept an open drink from a stranger?” “That’s if you’re at a frat party and someone shoves a fucking red cup in your face. The dude who bought that didn’t make it. Besides, they’re very expensive. Take ‘em while you can get ‘em.” “Dude? Really, Grace?” Out of nowhere, a deep voice swirled in my ear. “So you don’t like the drink?”

A wave of tingles washed over my body at the sound of his baritone voice and the vicinity of his body. Turning my head, my gaze collided with the deepest blue eyes I’d ever seen. His dark brows were crinkled together, and there was a slight pout to his lips. I tried to let out the breath stuck in my throat but he was too close, and I didn’t want to blow Fireball in his chiseled face. Swallowing hard, I finally said, “I haven’t tried it. I don’t know what it is.” I jolted at the touch of his hand on the small of my back as he shifted closer. “A melon ball.” I nodded as if I knew what he was talking about but apparently my confusion broke through the poker face I was struggling to hold on to. His pout turned into a sexy grin as he placed his bottle of beer on the bar. “Vodka, Midori, and

orange juice.” “You sent this?” “Sure did.” “To me?” “I thought the color would look nice with your dress.” His gaze roamed up and down, taking me in. “Does that line actually work?” “I’m about to find out.” His eyes stayed glued to mine as he picked up his beer and took a swig. “Slick.” “What’s your name?” His attention had parts of my body that had not been heard from in a very long time, waking up and heating up. Tonight had been overwhelming enough, I needed a little distance. Stepping back, I bumped into something solid.

“Grace?” Glancing over my shoulder, my gaze drifted up to find a very tall young man smiling down at me. “I’m sorry. I thought you were my friend.” “No prob,” he said then turned and flirted with the female bartender. “Nice to meet you, Grace.” Once again his deep voice hummed in my ear. Slightly disoriented, my gaze swung back to him. “What? Grace is my friend I came with tonight.” Scanning the dance floor, I spotted my friend, the one who promised to stay by my side the entire night, wiggling her ass against a tall blond quarterback type. “Let’s try this again. What’s your name?” “Cadence.” I blurted out, not remembering

whether I was supposed to be Francesca or Isabella. The same confused expression that took over everyone’s face the first time they heard my name appeared in front of me. “But everyone calls me, Caddie.” His brows knitted together as the tip of his tongue skimmed across his bottom lip. “I like Cadence.” As heat flooded my cheeks, the corners of my mouth curled into a shy smile. “Do you have a last name, Cadence?” Don’t give him your real last name. He could be a serial killer. A very sexy serial killer, but a serial killer nonetheless. “Beaverhousen.” I watched a lot of Will and Grace during my

recovery. Working hard to keep a straight face, he said, “Really? Beaverhousen?” “Are you mocking my family name?” I said with conviction. “I’d never do that. It’s nice to meet you Cadence Beaverhousen.” “Now it’s your turn to give it up.” He leaned in so close the tips of our noses were almost touching. “Luken Cockentail.” “That is not your real last name.” “Are you making fun of it?” “Oh no. I’d never do that.” “You outta see the family crest.” Laughter bubbled up and out of me. I couldn’t remember the last time I had this much fun. “You’ve got a great laugh,” Luken said.

Inside chills were shooting to every part of my body while outside my skin was covered in hot prickling goose bumps. I had no idea what I was thinking, flirting with him. This guy… this kid had to be in his early to mid-twenties like everyone else here. He needed his eyes checked if he thought we were remotely close in age. It was time to peel Grace off of her quarterback and call it a night. “Dance with me,” Luken said. I looked at the bodies frantically bumping and grinding into one another. Crinkling my nose, I said, “I don’t really like to dance.” “Then why did you come to a dance club?” “My friend Grace talked me into it. But you don’t have to stay with me. Feel free to go ask someone else and get yo dance on.” Nervous

laughter trickled out of me. “God that sounded stupid.” “You’re cute.” I had to get away from this Tiger Beat cover model before my hands started listening to the radio frequency broadcasting from my crotch. “Thank you… um… for that… and for the drink… and for the company. It was very nice meeting you. Have a good time dancing.” His head shook slightly. “Nah, I’ll wait.” “Wait for what?” “Until you cave to my charm and powers of persuasion, Ms. Beaverhousen.” “You’re quite confident. Some might say, cocky.” I winked. I winked! It was inadvertent, like an autoresponse. I had to reel it in. Every time I’d made

up my mind to get Grace and leave, Luken would speak, and that was that. I didn’t want to leave. But I had to steer clear of saying anything or doing anything remotely interpreted as flirting. I blinked my eyes rapidly, so it looked like I had something in them. “You alright there?” he said, stifling a laugh. “Yeah… um… dry contacts is all. So are you riding solo, as the kids say?” “Out with some buddies.” He tilted his chin to where Grace was still rubbing against the blond. “The overinflated dude dancing with the leggy brunette turned twenty-one today.” My throat began to close. Picking up the glowing green drink, I took a long draw from the skinny straw. Suddenly, the flashing lights stopped, and a blue glow fell over the entire place. The ear-

piercing fast music was replaced by a slow acoustic version of “Stay with Me.” “This is a great version of this song. I wonder who’s singing,” I said, pivoting toward a more innocuous topic. “Angus and Julia Stone.” “Wow, you really know your music.” He pointed over my shoulder. “They put the names of the performers on the screen above the DJ.” “Oh.” His deep blue gaze held my chocolate brown one for several seconds. As sweaty bodies cleared the dance floor, I felt the touch of a warm hand wrap around mine. I looked down at our joined hands. “What are you doing?”

“I like you. I like this song. And I really want to slow dance with you to this song.” In that moment something inside me clicked. For the first time in two years, I didn’t feel like I had that giant C hovering above my head. When Luken looked at me, I didn’t feel like a patient or a survivor. I felt like a woman. A desired woman. And even though I knew this fantasy would come to an end soon, I wanted to squeeze every bit of life out of it. As Luken led me to the center of the room, I noticed the fit of his white dress shirt as it stretched across his broad shoulders, falling down his toned body. His dark jeans hugged his firm ass and long legs perfectly. He had to be at least six feet three inches tall. Once we reached the dance floor, all rationale left my head. I stood

awkwardly, searching for an appropriate place to touch him that didn’t scream middle-aged pervert. Taking my wrists, he placed my hands behind his neck. His right arm snaked around my waist while he rested his left hand on my hip. As we began to gently sway, he leaned down bringing his forehead to mine. Breathing in his fresh woodsy scent, I melted into the moment. As the music swirled around us, the age difference and everything else faded away. Pressing me closer to his chest, he brushed his lips over mine. Heat smoldered between my legs. He teased my bottom lip, nibbling from corner to corner before gently sucking on it. My fingers slid up into his light brown hair as my eyes fluttered shut. The flavor of beer mixed with melon had my head spinning. Pulling me closer, he deepened the

kiss as he rocked into me. There was no denying his body’s reaction. The feel of his hard dick pressed against me was exhilarating. A low growl vibrated in Luken’s chest, causing a moan to escape me. Like a knife slicing through my head, the highpitched shriek of a guitar shot across the room. Before I knew what was happening, the floor transformed from our isolated cocoon back into the loud club filled with flashing lights and gyrating bodies. With my senses flooding back, I realized what I must have looked like on the dance floor with this kid. Needy. Desperate. Cougar. My hands fell to his chest and I shoved. We held each other’s gaze for several seconds. Luken’s expression confused me. I couldn’t decipher whether it was

disappointment that the moment was over or shock that he’d been making out with a much older woman. Either way, the spell was broken, and I needed to get out of there. “I’m… uh… sorry,” I stammered, stepping back. He came toward me. “For what?” “For… I can’t… I’ve got to go.” I turned and pushed through the crowd toward the exit. I didn’t search for Grace before bolting out of the club. It was like having a bucket of ice water dumped over my head when my hot sweaty skin hit the cool spring night air. Darting across the parking lot, I spotted a parked Uber car. I fished my phone out from my purse and sent Grace a text. Me: Got overheated. I’m fine. Going home.

Have fun. Talk tomorrow. I slid into the backseat and slammed the door. By the time Luken burst out of the club, the car was pulling away from the curb. I forced myself not to look back at him. Focusing straight ahead, I leaned back, inhaled a deep breath, and tried to make sense of what happened back there.

“IT IS TIME,” Grace said in her best Darth Vader voice, standing in the doorway of my office. For the rest of the weekend, I stuck to my story about being overcome by the extreme heat inside the club. It wasn’t a total lie. She didn’t need to

know that Luken was the reason I overheated. She seemed to buy my story and never pushed for more information. My hope was that the subject of our little Friday night adventure was a closed book. I tilted back in my chair. “God, I forgot today was the start of the training class. Can’t you take notes and slip them to me during third period?” “You best adjust your attitude or the teacher will spank you with his ruler. And when I say ruler, I mean…” “I know what you mean.” Today was the first day of training with the new software. The bank had hired a software developer to design a program specifically for those of us who worked with the wealthier clientele. Grace and I had been at TransSouth for fifteen years. In that time we’d sat through many

training sessions on the next “big thing” in financial analytics, only for it to be replaced six months later by the next “big thing” with more bells and whistles. Reluctantly, I pushed away from my desk and stood. “You and I both know this is a waste of time.” “There’s no one I’d rather waste time with than you, my love.” Draping her arm over my shoulder, we headed to Conference Room A, our home for the next two weeks. Grace and I arrived to find our two co-workers huddled around a table in the far corner of the room. The conference table had already been set up with four laptops and bulky binders loaded with what was sure to be the most boring information

known to man. At the front of the room was a desk with a similar laptop and an overhead projector. “Baby girls, come over here and get in on this smorgasbord,” Clayton hollered across the room as he piled another cheese Danish onto his plate. Clayton had been with the bank for about four years. Everything about him was round—his bald head, his cheeks, and his body. He’d just turned thirty and was the perfect combination of kind, funny, and crazy in a good way. Susan was the complete opposite. She’d been at the bank almost as long as Grace and me. All these years working with her and there were only two things I knew about Susan. She was a snooty bitch and a bitchy snoot. “Well, well, well… nice to see y’all are fueling up for a day of fun. Where’d all the goodies

come from?” I poured myself a cup of coffee. Clayton popped a grape in his mouth. “Guessing boss man.” “Doubtful.” Grace examined the pastry tray. It wasn’t that Mr. Morris, our boss, didn’t treat us well. He just wasn’t very thoughtful or generous with the bank’s money, and this was quite a spread for just the four of us. Susan took a seat at one of the computers. “If you ask me, sitting in here for two weeks is a complete squandering of my talents. Good morning, by the way.” “Well, no one asked you,” Clayton said. “All we need to do is pretend to listen to Poindexter for a couple of weeks. I plan on using my time wisely doing some ninja trip planning.” Clayton held up his iPhone. “By the time this little soirée is over,

Clayton’s vacay is gonna be planned and booked.” “That’s a gross misuse of company time.” Susan snapped. Knowing Grace and I would want to sit next to each other, Clayton reluctantly took the seat next to Susan. Leaning into her personal bubble, which was huge, Clayton smiled. “You wouldn’t rat me out would you, Susie Cue? Because Ricardo, my big Puerto Rican boyfriend would not appreciate our vacation plans being fucked up.” Clearing her throat, Susan eased away. “As long as you don’t impede my training, I suppose it will be fine.” “Have either of you met the trainer?” Grace asked, taking her seat. Both Clayton and Susan just shook their heads

in response. I settled into my spot next to Grace and flipped through the giant binder, not really paying attention to its content. “Well, this trainer is already fifteen minutes late. Not very impressive. The least he/she could do is be on time. We all could be working instead of sitting here wasting the day away. I think I’m going to go back to my office. Text me if Teacher shows up.” “I promise not to waste another minute of your time if you stay,” a deep voice said. My gaze snapped up to see narrow hips, broad shoulders, a chiseled jaw, and a pair of deep blue eyes. “Oh. My. God,” I said under my breath. “God. Bless. America,” Grace mumbled. Out the corner of my eye, I saw Clayton sit up

taller. “Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir?” “What does that mean?” Susan whispered, looking over his shoulder. “Will you sleep with me tonight?” Luken was staring straight in my direction, but I couldn’t tell if he recognized me. The club had been pretty dark, and we probably spent only twenty minutes with each other. Although they were twenty incredible minutes. Suddenly a wave of annoyance washed over me. How the hell could he not recognize me? Our bodies were pressed together while his tongue was halfway down my throat. He leaned back on the desk and rolled up the sleeves of his crisp white dress shirt. “I apologize for keeping you waiting. I stepped out for just a second and one of the tellers… Hannah, I think,

cornered me with some computer questions.” Young, perky breasted, redheaded, chatty bitch. “Well, let’s get started. Good morning or at least I hope it’s a good morning.” “It is now. Damn,” Clayton muttered a little too loudly. A faint blush fell across Luken’s gorgeous face. Even in the dimly lit club, it was obvious how handsome he was but seeing him in the bright light took my breath away. I’d never seen a person whose face was so perfectly symmetrical. Everything worked together to create one hell of a masterpiece. Clayton flailed his hands. “I was just playing with ya.” Staring at me, Luken said, “I like to be played

with.” He held my gaze for a second before clapping his hands and rubbing his palms together. “Alrighty, let’s get this show on the road. I hope everyone is enjoying the breakfast.” “So you’re the one who brought the goodies?” Grace asked. “Yeah, I feel it’s very important to butter up the trainees on the first day of class.” He winked. “I’d like to butter him up,” Clayton muttered. “Intros… I’m Luken Schaffer, your LTTranSolution software best friend for the next couple of weeks. Obviously, you all know one another but if you don’t mind introducing yourselves, so I know who I’m dealing with.” “I’m Susan Maxwell.” Luken gave her a faint smile. “Nice to meet you, Susan.”

“Grace Rodgers at your service.” Grace was sitting at an angle with her back to me, but I could feel her flirty smirk. “I’ll keep that in mind,” Luken said. Raising my coffee, I sunk behind the mug and further into my chair. Clayton puffed out his chest and announced. “Clayton Sebastian Montgomery.” “Wow, that’s quite a mouthful.” “You have no idea.” A big toothy grin crossed Clayton’s face at the same time a spray of coffee flew from my mouth. So much for hiding. There was no getting out of the introductions. I knew once Cadence hit his ears, the jig was up. Not wanting to ring any bells, I tried to wiggle my way around it. I swallowed hard and mumbled, “Caddie…”

Luken narrowed his eyes. “Katy?” Close enough. Peeking over the rim of my mug, I nodded. “Oh, please… This is the grand and glorious, Ms. Cadence Fletcher.” Clayton made a dramatic sweeping gesture with his arm. Fuck me. Luken’s head tilted slightly to the side. “What an unusual and beautiful name.” Simultaneously, Grace and Clayton murmured, “Mmm.” “Well, I guess we better get started. I preloaded your laptops with the software. The first screen…” I tried my best to focus on the information instead of how my body reacted to the sound of Luken’s voice. I thought the drinks and the

atmosphere in the club were partially to blame for my lapse in judgment Friday night. I’d convinced myself that I’d just got caught up in the moment. But each time he looked at me or walked behind my chair, my body vibrated with excitement. I still wasn’t a hundred percent positive he recognized me which was fine. I didn’t really want him to. Our brief moment was in the past, and it needed to stay there.

AS THE MORNING progressed, I was pleasantly surprised at how user-friendly the software turned out to be. Luken was an exceptional trainer. Very knowledgeable and patient. He limited the technical mumbo-jumbo and made things relatable.

“Oh, Mr. Schaffer,” Grace said. He looked at me briefly before turning his attention to my friend. “Luken. Please.” “Okay. Oh, Luken.” I could hear the smile in her tone. He came over, positioning himself between my chair and Grace’s. “What can I help you with, Ms. Grace?” “I’ve tried to input these figures twice, and it’s a no go.” She looked up, batting her eyelashes at him. I knew my best friend like the back of my hand. She didn’t need any help. She just wanted an upclose and personal view of our teacher. She was a flirt, plain and simple. She couldn’t help herself. It was in her DNA. But knowing that didn’t make it any easier for me to sit beside her and watch it

happen. Out the corner of my eye, I saw Luken turn slightly and lean forward. This brought his flawless ass into view. The magnetic force of nature had my head turning in that direction until I was double eye-balling it. With my mind drifting, I wondered if he wore boxers or briefs. I liked boxers on a man. Briefs always struck me as something a young boy would wear. Luken was young. Oh god, what if he still wore briefs? And what if they were Batman briefs or came from the Garanimals collection? A sudden shift in movement caused my head to whip forward. I tapped the keyboard furiously hoping he didn’t notice me checking out his ass. His large hand and toned forearm came into view as he leaned on the table, his chin almost touching

my cheek. “Is everything working well for you, Cadence?” Luken’s warm breath floated over my neck and cheek, causing goose bumps to appear over every inch of my body. Every inch. “Um… yes, everything is working great.” “Good, I’m glad to hear you’re satisfied.” I squirmed in my seat, pushing my knees together. Struggling to keep my eyes focused ahead, I continued to work, waiting for him to back off. He didn’t. Just the opposite. He was so close, I swore I felt his lips brush over the shell of my ear. “How much longer are we going to pretend?” Luken whispered. I shifted away, kept working, and acted as if I didn’t hear him. “Apparently a little longer.” He stayed in this

position for another second before leaving my side. The rest of the morning Luken left me alone. No more flirty comments or intense stares. Even though I knew it was for the best, I did kind of miss the attention. I made sure to reel in my wayward thoughts and retain my professionalism. I was here to learn and upgrade my skill set. Not to fawn over the hot trainer who moved around the room with confidence and humility. The enthusiasm in his voice and expression when he talked about the software was nothing short of adorable. Adorable in a strictly professional sense, of course. Now that I knew for sure he recognized me I felt like a complete fool. My nerves were frazzled. I was afraid he’d say something about our first meeting in front of my co-workers. I could tell

Grace and Clayton were already wise to the energy between Luken and I. And knowing those two, they were chomping at the bit to corner me and begin their interrogation. When lunchtime arrived, I knew I needed a plan of escape. Being that there were only four of us made it hard to sneak out unnoticed. My only option was to finish early and leave before the others. By this time, I felt confident Luken wouldn’t spill the beans about us in front of the others. I shut down my computer and grabbed my cell phone. I was just about to stand and make a beeline to the door when Luken thwarted my plan. “I think this is a good place to stop for lunch.” I quickly made my way to the door while everyone else was shutting down their computers. My hand was almost on the doorknob when I heard

my name. “Cadence, can I have a word with you, please?” Closing my eyes, I inhaled a deep breath and turned to him. “Can it wait? I’m starving.” He clicked around on his laptop, not looking at me. “It won’t take long.” I stepped away from the door so that the others could leave. Susan passed without comment. “I wouldn’t mind if Professor Sexy held me after class,” Grace whispered before giving my ass a quick pinch. “Mmmhmm… Teacher’s pet.” Clayton purred on his way out. What I had been trying to avoid all morning then happened. Luken and I were alone. My stomach slowly twisted into a tight knot as I

succumbed to cottonmouth. Sucking on the inside of my cheeks, I desperately tried to get even a dribble of moisture, but my salivary glands had ceased to exist. Still not looking at me, he continued clicking on his computer. “Would you close the door, please?” Clearing my dry throat, I croaked. “I’m pretty sure it’s against company policy for a male and female to be behind closed doors unless the room is clearly visible, like through a glass wall or door.” I had no idea if there was an actual rule. I was just babbling nonsense. All I knew was that no good could come of this situation. Luken held my gaze as he walked slowly toward me. Reaching around my body, he grabbed

the edge of the door and pushed it shut. “I’m quite the rule breaker.” He stood in front of me, blocking the door, and stared with an unreadable expression. After what felt like a lifetime of silence, I figured he was waiting for me to make the first move. Nervous laughter bubbled out of “Awkward.” “Have lunch with me.” “I don’t think that’s a very good idea.”

me.

“Then have dinner with me.” “I feel sharing a meal of any kind would be inappropriate in our situation.” “We have a situation? Huh. How about that. I just thought you’d want to explain why you ran out on me Friday night.” “We don’t really need an entire meal for that.”

I paused for a second to gather my thoughts. “I’m sorry about the other night. The past two years have been difficult, to say the least, and I’m not used to… Let’s just say I was way out of my comfort zone. Going to the club was actually Grace’s idea and…” “This is definitely going to require a meal, Cadence.” “I can’t go out with you.” He took a step toward me, putting us less than a foot apart. “When I walked in here this morning and saw you, I wanted to jump across that table, grab your face, and kiss you hard.” My knees wobbled. “Well, that certainly would have raised some eyebrows.” “So what time can I pick you up tonight?” “We’re not doing this. We can’t do this.”

“Give me one good reason why you won’t go on a date with me? Because I know you want to go on a date with me, Cadence.” At the moment my ego couldn’t handle the subject of our obvious age difference. Luken wasn’t stupid, he could tell by looking at me that I was older than him, especially under these fucking fluorescent lights. I just felt the actual number of years that separated us was irrelevant. So, I flipped through my mind for other possible reasons besides age to make my point. “Because you’re my teacher and there are rules against student/teacher fraternization.” Grinning, he said, “You’re really cute.” My cheeks flushed. “Well… um… thank you.” Leaning in, his body heat mingled with mine, causing the temperature in the room to skyrocket.

“There’s a bit of a flaw in your reasoning.” His gaze dropped down to my lips then bounced back up to meet mine. “I’m not a professor, you’re not a student, and we’re not standing on the quad at the University of Who Gives a Shit.” “Granted, there might not be an official rule, but I’m sure the company would frown upon it.” His fingertips ran down the side of my face, barely touching my skin. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you the entire weekend.” Things were getting blurry—my head, my vision, and the reason why I shouldn’t kiss him. “I thought about you too.” The words were out before I could cram them back down my throat. Luken cast some type of spell that caused all my common sense to fly out the window. I needed to go and clear the haze, but my feet stayed glued to

the floor. I bit down on my bottom lip and tried to decide what to do. He must have taken this as the green light because before I knew it, his lips pressed against mine. My eyes were closing, and my lips were parting, when suddenly, the door swung open, and Clayton came barreling through talking on his cell phone. I jumped back as Luken turned away. “I’ll call you back,” Clayton said into his phone. Luken turned and slapped our surprise guest on the shoulder. “Perfect timing, dude.” Sarcasm clung to each word. With my wide eyes looking directly at Clayton, I said, “Lunch?” Slowly, a Grinch-like smile spread across Clayton’s round face. “Looks like you’ve already

been nibblin’.” “Yes… well… Looks can be deceiving. Different angles and shadows have you seeing all kinds of things that aren’t really there. Besides, the lighting in this room is horrible.” “Seems nice and bright to me.” Before they made further comments, I bolted out of the room without another word. I was almost safely inside my office when I heard the pitterpatter of Manolos and Armani loafers. Grace shoved me inside and into a chair while Clayton shut and locked the door. “Spill.” Grace ordered, leaning back on my desk. I acted as innocent as possible. “Spill what?” “The beans. What the hell do you think? Clayton told me he saw you and Mr. Schaffer in a

lip lock.” I sneered at Clayton. “You know the speed at which sound travels from your mouth to her ears is astonishing.” “What can I say? It’s a gift.” Grace snapped her fingers to stop our bickering. “I want to know about the kiss. Were his lips soft? Did they taste like mint? Because I detected a minty freshness when he was helping me. Did he get har…?” “That’s enough! Clayton didn’t see anything because there wasn’t anything to see. I told you the angles and shadows were playing tricks on your eyes.” “Bullshit!” Clayton blurted out as he took a spot next to Grace. “Cadence, sweetheart, these baby browns cannot be tricked. So why don’t you

just give us the scoop and we can all go enjoy a lovely lunch. I’ll even buy you an ice cream.” He smiled. “Just so you know, the ice cream line followed by that smile is pretty creepy.” “Oooh, Caddieee, just tell us.” Grace whined. Looking up into their curious and determined gazes made me feel like I was in the principal’s office. I was hungry and knowing these two wouldn’t let up until I gave them something, I did just that. “Today wasn’t the first time I met Luken. We met Friday night at the club, and we shared one dance. That’s it. Let’s go eat.” I was halfway out of the chair when Grace placed both hands on my shoulders and gently pushed me back down.

Her perfectly arched eyebrow rose. “Where was I when all of this was happening?” “Shimming your ass against a barely legal blond.” A wistful expression crossed her face. “Ah, yes. He was yummy.” Clayton huffed. “We’re getting off track.” He glanced at Grace. “FYI, we’ll be circling back around to yummy blond.” “What you saw in the conference room was him helping me get something out of my eye.” “Your eyes were closed,” Clayton said. I was trapped and out of excuses. Reluctantly, I finally confessed. “We may have kissed while we were dancing.” I cleared my throat. “And maybe almost in the conference room.”

Clayton’s hand flew to his chest as he gasped. “Lady Marmalade!” Grinning, Grace said, “I knew it! I could feel the heat between the two of you. This is fantastic! Yay!” She threw her hands up in the air. I shook my head from side to side rapidly. “It’s not fantastic. There’s no yay. Nothing happened… Well, something happened, but it’s in the past. Moving forward nothing will happen.” “Are you out of your mind?” Grace asked. “You have a young, hot guy wanting to fuck you and you’re going to toss the opportunity away? Are you completely mad?” Clayton tilted his head to the side, giving me a sympathetic look. “What Gracie said.” Glancing down, I fidgeted with my cell phone. “He’s very nice…”

“Eeeps!” Grace squeaked. “And sexy…” Clayton fanned himself with one hand. “And very young.” “He’s the fucking trifecta!” Grace said. Clayton continued to fan himself. “Melting into his arms would be like taking candy from a baby.” I glared at him. “Sorry, that’s probably not the best analogy being that he’s on the young side.” He frantically waved his hands. “That’s neither here nor there. All that matters is he’s legal, and you’re free.” “But not ready.” The air shifted and the joking came to a standstill. My friends were well aware of how the past two years had affected me. Besides cancer, just the idea of a new man in my life was

something I hadn’t considered and it scared the hell out of me. “Caddie, don’t let fear keep you from living your life,” Grace said. Squatting in front of me, Clayton looked up into my eyes. “And don’t let something silly as the age thing stop you from having fun. He’s a big boy who looks like he knows what he’s doing.” Out of nowhere, I felt the sting of tears behind my eyes. It was stupid getting upset about something I didn’t have with someone I didn’t know. But it had been such a long time since I’d felt wanted. Hell, it had been a long time since I’d felt anything. No matter what Luken’s motives were, I’d already become addicted to that feeling. If I were just a few years younger and he were just a few years older, I think I could fall for him. It

made me sad and pissed off that after all this time, the one person I felt a connection with was off limits.

I SPENT THE next two days not making direct eye contact, not swooning, or engaging in any flirting with Luken. And most importantly, I was never alone with him. It was hard, but I’d been through chemo for god sake. Resisting an intelligent,

charming, hot young guy would be a piece of cake. Simply a little self-control, no matter how strong the pull to him was. During lunch, I locked myself in my office and waited until the last minute to go back to training. After work when I was by myself safe at home, my thoughts drifted. I’d picture what he wore that day and the ease with which he carried himself. I was impressed with his knowledge and humor. But with all of his obvious attributes that would make any female fall under his spell, there was still something different that I couldn’t put my finger on. I felt connected to him and didn’t understand why. At the end of day four, I was able to slip out of class while Susan occupied Luken with questions. After a quick stop at my office, I’d be free and clear. Tomorrow was Friday. My plan was to get

my head out of the clouds over the weekend. Seeing him every day made it hard to completely block him from my mind. My hope was to spend a couple of days away from him, and by Monday morning I’d be back to my old self. Sitting at my desk, I was checking my emails when my phone buzzed with a text. Grace: Are you still here? Me: Yep. Just checking emails. Grace: Stop by my office before you head out. Me: Will do. Ten minutes later, I was walking down the hall to Grace’s office. As I approached, I could hear her unmistakable throaty laugh. Once at the door, I

saw the reason for her good mood. Luken was sitting across the desk from her. Waving me in, Grace said, “Caddie! Come in. Sit down.” I took the chair next to Luken and stared daggers into Grace. Her gaze swung between him and me before she stood. “Caddie, Mr. Schaffer has requested an uninterrupted word with you.” In silence, she gathered up her things and walked out of the office, closing the door behind her. My soon-to-be ex-best friend had singlehandedly ruined all the work I’d put into avoiding a situation like this. Focusing on the large painting over Grace’s desk, I felt a rush of blood throughout my body. Luken appeared in front of me, causing my gaze

to travel to his piercing eyes. I knew he was a lot younger than me, but there was a maturity behind those eyes that made me forget about the number. “Why do you keep avoiding me?” he said, a tinge of sadness in his voice. “Because this isn’t right and we don’t need to delve into it any further.” “You’re just hung up on the age difference. I’m twenty-five, Cadence. How old are you anyway? Thirty?” I took a moment to enjoy his miscalculation. “I’m forty.” I expected to see the look of shock and horror cross his face, but I never did. “So what. The number doesn’t matter to me.” “Don’t you find it ironic that your business is numbers and you don’t care about the big one

between us?” “Don’t try to get me off track by being adorable.” A long sigh seeped out of me. “Sixteen to twenty-five is considered adorable. Not forty.” “I’m drawn to you, I don’t know why but I want to find out. I know you feel it too.” “The little bit of time I’ve spent with you has meant more to me than you’ll ever know.” “Then let me take you out.” He paused. “One date, that’s all I’m asking.” Hope lit up his face. Standing, I put on a serious game face and looked him directly in the eye so he’d see how serious I was. “We’re not a good idea.” “Just because I’m a few years younger than you…” “Fifteen years. I’m a high school sophomore

older than you… A whole person able to drive older than you.” “It’s just dinner, Cadence. What are you so afraid of?” A prickling heat crawled up my neck and to my cheeks at the sound of his voice wrapped around my name. “I’ve not been on a date with a twenty-fiveyear-old since I was a twenty-five-year-old.” “Dating hasn’t really changed that much.” “Yes, it has. You practically have to be a tech geek with all the apps, social media, and websites out there.” “Lucky for you, I’m a pretty low-tech guy, despite my career. We can take it slow. In fact, for dinner, we can eat slow smoked barbecue and drink slow roasted coffee.”

“Now you’re making fun of me.” He took a step forward, putting him only a few inches from my body. “No, I’m not. Listen, I’ll adjust to whatever speed makes you comfortable.” Looking over his shoulder, I focused back on the painting as if the answer was hiding in the mix of colors. “Come on, Cadence, give a guy a shot. I promise I won’t bite… Unless you’re into that sort of thing.” He winked. God help me. “One dinner.” My stern expression crumbled. He held up his hands in surrender. “One dinner.” “Okay.” “I’ll pick you up at seven.” “Tonight? But isn’t it a school night?”

His jaw clenched. “I’m not some immature kid.” My gaze dropped as regret hit my stomach. “I know you’re not. I’m sorry. I was trying to lighten the mood, and it came out bitchy. I just didn’t realize you meant tonight.” “No time like the present and it’ll give you less time to weasel your way out of it.” “But I need time to get ready.” There was slight panic in my tone. “Then you better get going. Although, you look incredible just the way you are.” His gaze lingered on my mouth for a second. “I guess you need my address or I could just meet you.” “I’d never be a douche and ask you to meet me for a date, and I actually already have your

address.” “Okay then… tonight.” I headed toward the door. “Cadence.” Stopping, I turned to face him. “Yes.” “Two things you should know about tonight. One, I’ll be kissing you repeatedly, if that’s alright with you. And two, my mom lets me stay out as late as I want.” He smirked. Laughing, I left the office and power walked down the hall in search of Grace. I figured I had just enough time to beg her to help me get ready for my date and kill her for interfering.

STANDING IN FRONT of my full-length mirror, I

dropped the dress I’d been holding in front of me. “I can’t do this,” I said to Grace who was sprawled out on my bed drinking a glass of red wine. Thankfully, she agreed to help me get ready and to give me moral support. She owed me since she was the one who got me into this mess. “You can and will.” She took a sip of wine. “No… no… no. This is not a good idea. I don’t know what I was thinking when I agreed to go out with him.” I disappeared into my closet and rummaged through more of my clothes. “I think it’s absolutely fabulous and much needed. That’s why I helped the dashing Luken snare you.” I stuck my head out of the closet. “Thank you and fuck you.”

She giggled into her glass. “Caddie, summer is right around the corner. What’s the harm in having a fun fling with a virile young man? If you think about it, this is the perfect time for the two of you to get together. Sex-u-ally speaking.” I dumped another armful of possible outfits on the bed. “What are you talking about?” “Biology! Both of you are in your prime fucking years.” “You get classier with each word.” I held up a black pantsuit. “Thoughts?” “It’s scientific. And hell no, you’re not running for president.” Grace looked through the pile. “This one.” She held up my white sleeveless turtleneck swing dress with gray pinstripes. “It’s a little too short.” “Exactly! A little bare shoulder and leg will

drive him nuts.” She shoved the dress into my chest and disappeared into the closet. “I don’t want to drive him anywhere.” Grace walked back in the room holding a pair of gray kitten heels. “These are perfect. We’ll keep the jewelry to a minimum. Some silver hoops and a bracelet.” Plopping down on the bed, I put my face in my hands and mumbled. “My head has stopped working. I’m not thinking clearly.” “Good. The only part of your body you should be listening to is your fanny or as you Americans call it, your vajayjay.” “Grace, what if he’s got some sort of fetish like a mother complex? Oh my god! It’s like when Mrs. Brady dated Greg.” “I have no idea who you’re babbling on

about.” “Or Mrs. Robinson seducing Dustin Hoffman.” “Oooh, I like the sound of that. Come on, time to get ready.” Grace tugged me off of the bed, shoved a glass of wine in my hand, and waved her magic wand.

AFTER ONE LAST pep talk, Grace had left and I ended up pacing for the next twenty minutes. My nerves were wound so tight I about jumped out of my skin when the knock sounded on the other side of the door. Taking one last glance at my outfit, I

inhaled a deep breath and opened the door. “Hi.” The word came out on an exhale making it sound all breathy. Butterflies swirled in the pit of my stomach at the sight of him in a light gray long-sleeve shirt and dark jeans with his short hair worked into a deliberately messy style. And to make me swoon, even more, was the bouquet of wildflowers he was holding. “Wow,” he said, staring intently at me. A warm blush crept across my cheeks. “Luken.” “What?” “Stop looking at me that way.” “Then stop looking that way.” Snapping out of his trance, he held out the flowers. “These are for you. Hope you’re not allergic.”

I held his gaze and took the flowers. “Thank you. They’re beautiful.” Holding them up, I breathed in their sweet scent. “And no, I’m not allergic. Come in while I put them in water.” I couldn’t deny the thrill I got watching him walk through my door and into my life. “Make yourself at home. I’ll be right back,” I said walking into the kitchen. My place had an open floorplan, making the living room and kitchen one huge space. As I arranged the flowers in a vase, it struck me how natural it felt to have Luken in my home. I placed the vase of flowers on the breakfast bar that separated the two rooms then joined him. He had worked his way to the corner where I had a few framed photos on a small table. Standing slightly behind him, I teased. “See

anything you like?” “Are these your parents?” “Yeah. It was taken last year at their forty-fifth wedding anniversary.” “Nice. My parents have been together for a long time too. Is that your brother?” He pointed at the picture of Michael and me on the beach in Mexico. I had considered putting the photo away several times since the breakup, but it was a happy memory. And that’s how I wanted to remember my time with Michael. This spur of the moment date night had me rattled. If I’d been thinking clearly, I would have slipped it into a drawer before Luken got here. “No, I don’t have any siblings. Mom had a hard time getting pregnant. She and Dad almost

gave up after the third miscarriage, but then I came along. When that happened, they decided to quit while they were ahead.” I had no idea why I felt compelled to reveal my family history. A simple, “no”, would have sufficed. But for some strange reason I wanted to share a part of my life with him. “I’m sorry.” He looked and sounded so sincere. “It was a very long time ago. How about you?” “I have one sister.” “Are you the baby of the family?” He looked at me with narrowed eyes. “Sorry, that wasn’t meant to be a commentary on…” He shook his head and chuckled. “God you’re cute. In fact, I’m the oldest by five minutes.” “You’re a twin?”

“Yeah, but I’m still one of a kind.” I didn’t even try to hide my eye roll. Picking up the picture, he examined it. “So this Tom Cruise look-a-like was a boyfriend… husband… gay best friend?” “Boyfriend.” “How long were the two of you together?” I hesitated for a moment. “Twelve years.” He drew in a sharp breath. “And how long have y’all not been together?” “One month.” He gingerly placed the photo back in its spot. “Looks like I’ve got my work cut out for me.” “I wouldn’t worry too much. You’re off to a pretty good start.” Mindlessly, I slipped my arm around his bicep and rested my head on his shoulder. Once I

realized what I’d just done, I told myself to pull away, but I didn’t. One of the things I’d missed most over the past several years was the simple touch of affection. Twisting his body toward me, Luken cupped the sides of my face. As his lips touched mine, a rush of emotion hit my heart. He pulled away, his chest rising and falling rapidly. “We better…” He came in for a quick kiss. “…Get going.” Another quick kiss. “It takes about a half hour to get there.” I drew in as much oxygen as my lungs would hold. “Then I guess we better get going.” With his hand glued to the small of my back, we made our way out to his car. We stopped at a beautiful silver luxury truck. My first thought was boys and their toys. My second thought was his parents must be loaded. There was no way a

trainer at a small software company could make enough to afford such an expensive ride. Opening the passenger door, he said, “Your chariot awaits.” “Wow, you’ve got a really big truck.” Standing behind me, he lowered his lips to my ear. “I’m in no way overcompensating for any inadequacies, in case you were wondering.” “I wasn’t but thanks for the heads up anyway.” Slipping his hands around my waist, he helped me into the truck. He held my gaze as he buckled me in, giving me a quick peck on the mouth before closing the door. Luken rounded the front of the car and slid into the driver’s seat. He leaned in close. “Being with you feels awesome… natural.” He didn’t give me a chance to respond before capturing my bottom lip and

sucking gently. My heart was pounding so fast I thought it was going to burst out of my chest. He let go of my lip but didn’t back away. “I like kissing you.” “I like being kissed by you,” I whispered. Internally I was kicking and screaming. I promised myself tonight would just be two new friends going out for dinner. There’d be no flirting, no kissing, and no touching. Only fifteen minutes in and I’d broken all three promises willingly. I should have made up an excuse and gotten out of the truck. The fact that I didn’t scared me to death.

“YOU NEVER TOLD me where we were going,” I said. We’d been on the road for about twenty minutes. The conversation had been steady and easy. Being with Luken felt new and exciting, but

also comfortable and natural. He glanced at me with a mischievous grin. “No, I haven’t.” “Come on, give a girl a clue.” Reaching over, he placed his hand on my knee and gave it a squeeze. “You’ll find out soon enough.” Luken was a man of his word because within minutes we were pulling into the parking lot of the Silver Screen drive-in movie theater. “I didn’t think any of these still existed,” I said, the excitement evident in my voice. “It’s the only one left in the state. I hope it’s a good surprise.” “It’s a fantastic surprise.” I beamed out the window at the big flashing neon marque. “When I was a kid my parents brought me to the drive-in all

the time. I’d be in the backseat in my pj’s with a blanket and pillow. After stuffing my face with junk food, I’d snuggle down in the seat to watch the movie. Usually, I fell asleep before it was over, but I didn’t care, it was always so much fun. Thank you for bringing me here.” When I looked at him, I was met by a huge smile. I felt my cheeks heat with embarrassment. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to geek out on you.” “Don’t apologize. It bodes well for me that the little things in life excite you. Again, not a comment on any inadequacies on my part.” Once inside the “theater”, Luken backed the truck up into the parking space. I watched with amazement as he transformed the bed into a cozy nook with thick blankets and large fluffy pillows.

The fact that he’d gone to this much trouble in such a short amount of time overwhelmed me. “I can’t believe you did all of this.” “You gave me only one shot. I had to make the most of it if I had any chance of getting a second one.” He lifted me and sat me down on the back of the truck bringing us eye to eye. Raising my hand to his face, my fingertips trickled down the scruff that peppered his jaw. I leaned in and placed a kiss at the corner of his mouth. “I was already impressed before tonight.” “Damn. And to think instead of doing all this, we could have stayed in and made out.” Placing my palms flat against his hard chest, I shoved him back. “Don’t get too cocky. I like the effort.”

Luken jumped into the truck, extended his hand and helped me to my feet. Slipping off my shoes, I said, “If I’d known tonight was going to involve climbing, I would have worn pants.” “That’s why I kept it a secret.” He winked. “Make yourself comfortable. I’ll be right back.” While Luken headed toward the concession stand, I settled down into the cloud of blankets and pillows. Gazing up at the stars that were beginning to pop out, I thought about the advice Grace and Clayton gave me. Maybe they were right, and I just needed to relax and enjoy the moment. Odds were a pretty young girl would catch his attention and whatever this was between us would soon fizzle out. And I’d be left with a great memory of the time when a gorgeous young man made me feel

attractive again. “Hey, a little help.” His deep voice snapped my head out of the clouds. Luken had an armful of stuffed bags. “Did you buy out the entire stand?” “I wasn’t sure what you liked, so I got one of everything,” he said, handing me the bags of food. “You could have asked.” He sat beside me, our shoulders and thighs touching. “I wanted to continue the surprise theme of the night.” My mouth watered as we spread out a smorgasbord of artery clogging deliciousness— hot dogs, hamburgers, fries, onion rings, soft pretzels, and funnel cakes. He reached around his side and produced a small cooler of beer and a bottle of my favorite Merlot. For a second, I was

confused as to how he knew what wine I liked. I mean, the drive-in was a lucky shot, but there was no way he’d get two in one night. Then it dawned on me… Fairy godmother Grace had struck again. After pouring me a glass of wine he raised his beer and toasted. “To our first but hopefully not our last date.” I clinked my red cup with his bottle. “Cheers.” “Dig in.” He popped a fry into his mouth. This was the most romantic thing anyone had ever done for me and the genuine happiness on Luken’s face when he saw my reaction touched my heart deeply. I leaned in and placed a lingering kiss on his cheek. “Thank you again,” I whispered against his skin. After stuffing ourselves, there was still time

before it would be dark enough for the movie to start. Although I wasn’t interested in opening up a can of worms about my relationship with Michael, it was killing me not knowing about Luken’s history. I picked at the last piece of funnel cake. “Since you know about my last relationship it’s time for you to cough up some details of your own.” With beer in hand, he relaxed back on the pillows and stretched out his long legs. “Technically, I only know that you had one for twelve years and now you don’t. What happened?” “My lips will remain sealed until you gimme a little somethin’, somethin’.” A deep chuckle rumbled from his chest. “Seeing as how I plan on breaking that seal in the near future, I guess it wouldn’t hurt to loosening it

up a bit.” A chill ran through my body at the thought of kissing him again. “There was a girl in high school who I’d been friends with since we were sophomores. Our senior year we started dating and by the end of freshman year in college we’d stopped.” “Aaand?” “And that’s the longest relationship I’ve had, if you even want to call it that.” “So y’all were together for two years?” “I guess, technically. I don’t really count the time in college. She went out of state, and we saw each other maybe six times that entire year.” “Were you in love with her?” My eyes widened the second the words left my mouth. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to get so personal.”

His hand found the small of my back, his thumb slowing moving back and forth like a pendulum. “It’s okay. I want to get personal with you.” I glanced over my shoulder at sincere eyes and a sweet, faint smile. “And to answer your question, no. I wasn’t in love with her.” “Have you ever been in love?” “I never wanted to be. My focus has always been my career.” “You’re kidding?” “Why is that so hard to believe?” “Because I’ve experienced firsthand the spell you cast just by walking in a room. Clayton was ready to propose the first time he laid eyes on you. So the idea that there have been no other girls seems impossible.”

“Oh, there were other girls.” A sharp twinge of jealousy pierced my chest. He sat up and grabbed another beer. “You didn’t ask me about other girls. You asked me if I’d been in love.” “True.” He gave me a nip on the shoulder. “God, you’re cute when you’re jealous.” “Pfft, that’s ridiculous. I never said I was jealous.” “You didn’t have to. I can see a hint of it in your eyes. That’s a good sign.” He kissed my cheek before reclining back. “There’s nothing in my eyes.” Since I’d gone this far with my questions, I figured I might as well go all the way. I scooted back and turned toward him.

“Wouldn’t you rather be on a date with someone who’s better suited for you?” His grip around the bottle tightened. “I’m on a date with someone perfectly suited for me.” “You could have had your pick of any of the girls at the club the other night. Why me?” “Because you’re not like any of the girls at the club.” “Well, that’s for damn sure. I’m old enough to be…” I cringed. “…their mother. If I’d been a child bride that is.” “Do you want me to list all the reasons why I’m attracted to you?” Waving my hands, I said, “No. No. That’s not necessary.” I paused, my gaze bouncing around for a second. “Unless it’s something you feel compelled to do.”

“You’re smart and funny and sweet. A little awkward. Beautiful. Hot. When I saw you at the end of the bar, I somehow felt you needed me and I knew I needed you. It doesn’t make sense, but that’s how it is.” I slipped my hand behind his neck and pulled him closer. Brushing my lips against his, I whispered, “It makes sense to me.” As the kiss deepened, Luken’s hand moved up my thigh and over my hips, coming to rest on my ribcage. Sinking my fingers into his hair, I felt myself leaning back, pulling him along until he was almost completely on top of me. I broke the kiss and tried to catch my breath. “We better control ourselves, or they’ll throw us out.”

“It’s hard to control myself around you.” He rubbed the tip of his nose along mine. My body vibrated. “But you made all these plans and what about the movie?” “What movie?” Laughing, I shoved him back. “Come on.” With his arm draped over my shoulders, I snuggled under the blanket and into Luken’s side as the movie started. For the next two hours, we touched and kissed, each becoming more intense as the evening wore on. For the first time in two years not only was my body feeling sensations but my heart was feeling deeper than I expected, and I was loving it. I decided to get out of my head and stop worrying about the “what ifs”. Luken was helping me find Cadence Fletcher again, and I didn’t want him to stop.

We rode back to my place in comfortable silence. Luken held my hand practically the entire way, except for a few times when he touched my thigh. When he parked the truck in my driveway, neither of us made a move to get out. It had been twelve years since I’d been on a first date and I wasn’t sure of the protocol. Should I ask him up? Was he expecting me to ask him up? If I asked him up would he think I wanted to have sex with him? Not that I didn’t want to have sex with him. I did. Which was very inappropriate and hypocritical of me. I’d been all over the guy for the past four hours. But he needed to know about my diagnosis if we went further, just not tonight. Once I told him, he’d look at me differently and I wasn’t ready for that just yet. “Cadence, are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. I guess I’m a little tired.” “I’ll walk you to your door,” he said before getting out of the truck. As he rounded the front, I let out a sigh of relief. He didn’t expect to come in, and I didn’t have to deal with an awkward conversation. When we reached my front door, I slid the key in the lock and twisted. Turning to face him, I said, “Tonight was incredible. Best I’ve had in a very long time.” “So do I get a second shot?” “Luken…” “Cadence…” I hesitated for a moment and then decided to shut my brain off and listen to my heart for a little longer. “Yes.” Luken stepped forward, causing me to move

back until I was pressed up against the door. His hands tangled in my hair as he devoured my mouth. My legs parted letting his hips push into me as close as possible. I hadn’t been this wet in over two years. Wrapping my arms around his waist, I pulled him harder against me. The friction was exquisite. The deep growls that rumbled from his chest, almost caused me to come right then. This had gotten out of hand fast. Things needed to slow down. Thankfully, Luken broke the kiss. Gasping for air, he said, “I’ll see you tomorrow at work.” Breathless, I nodded. “Okay.” He came in for another kiss, only this time, it was slow, controlled, and hot as hell. He took a step back. “I’m going now. I gotta date with a cold shower.”

He left me laughing as he backed away. But just when I got the strength back in my legs and was about to peel myself off the door, he rushed in for another kiss. “Best night of my life,” he whispered against my lips, then finally disappeared. I floated all the way into my bedroom. Passing the full-length mirror, I stopped. No longer did I see the chemo ghost hovering in front of me. The only thing reflected back was the glow of happiness.

MY HEART FLUTTERED when I peeked in the partially opened door and saw him. With a cup of Starbucks in each hand, I nudged the door wider and scanned the conference room making sure it was empty.

“Good morning!” I winced at the amount of cheer in my voice. His eyes lit up when he saw me. “It is now.” “I brought you a going away present,” I said, offering him one of the coffees. For the past week Luken and I not only spent our days together, but our nights as well, going to dinner, the movies, and concerts in the park. If I had to put a label on it, we were casually dating, I guess. All I knew was I hadn’t felt this happy and excited in years. But today was the final day of training, and I wasn’t quite sure how that would affect our after-hours time. In a strange way being held up in this conference room all day and then going out each night for the past two weeks felt like we’d been living in our own little cocoon. And after today, we’d be heading back into reality.

“Thank you,” he said, taking the coffee. “You’re here early.” “I wanted to have a few minutes alone with you since it’s our last day.” “Don’t say that.” There was a bite in his tone. “Well, it’s true.” With coffee in one hand, he closed the door with the other and walked me backwards until my ass hit the edge of the conference table. Never once taking his eyes off of me, he put down his coffee, grabbed my hips, and sat me on the table. There was barely an inch of space between us. “Spend the weekend with me.” I had a hard time thinking clearly when he was this close. “I don’t know.” “Do you have plans?” “No, but…”

“No buts. Cadence, today might be my last day here, but you and I are just starting.” “It seems kind of quick to be going away together. Can I think about it?” “We’re done here at noon. If I don’t have an answer by then, I expect a call later.” I gave him a slight nod. The tip of his tongue slid over his bottom lip as his gaze dropped to my mouth. With his hands flat on the table, he leaned in even closer, forcing me back slightly. My hands traveled up his torso feeling every ripple and curve. His lips crashed into mine unapologetically. Opening my legs wider, he stepped in closer, pulling me to the edge of the table. Forgetting who I was and where I was, I allowed a slow deep moan to vibrate from the back of my throat. The sounds of a rattling doorknob and voices

faded in and out of my awareness. I was so lost in Luken that nothing else was able to penetrate the fog. Suddenly, he broke the kiss which was quickly followed by Clayton’s voice. “Oh, Susan! I forgot the surprise I have for you in my office,” he said, blocking the door. Luken and I froze, clamping our mouths shut trying to contain our laughter. “What surprise?” Susan asked. “Now if I told you it wouldn’t be a surprise.” “Why on earth would you have a surprise for me? It’s not my birthday, and I was under the impression you didn’t even like me.” “Lady Gaga! Whatever gave you that idea?” Luken and I were both turning red from lack of oxygen. “Well, your constant eye rolls whenever you

see me are somewhat of an indication.” “I have astigmatism. Now come on, let’s get your surprise.” As the click of heels faded, I peeked over Luken’s shoulder toward the door to find Clayton’s round face peeking in the room. “Thank you,” I said. “You’re welcome. You owe me. And nice form.” Realizing we were still tangled together, Luken and I disengaged from each other. “What are you going to do when Susan finds out there’s no surprise?” Luken asked. “Honey, don’t worry about that. I’ll tell her Grace confiscated it. A catfight will ensue. It’ll be fabulous. You two have about ten more minutes. Carry on.” He gently closed the door smiling.

By 4 p.m. I was sitting at my desk and still hadn’t given Luken my answer about the weekend. I assumed when he asked me to spend it with him that included sharing a bed. I wanted to, but my nerves were taking over again. Even though I doubted much had changed in the sex department, the fact was, for the past twelve years I’d only been with one person. And that person was my age. Plus, I hadn’t even broached the subject of my diagnosis yet. I realized I needed to fill him in on the past two years of my life, but everything was going along so smoothly I wanted to enjoy it a little longer. Suddenly, my phone buzzed with a text. Luken: Hey, hottie. You busy? The corners of my mouth involuntarily curled

up. Me: No. Within a second my cell phone rang. “I’ve missed you.” The deep, gravelly voice caused goose bumps to pop up along my arms. “It’s nice being missed by you.” “That can be fixed with one simple word. Will you spend the weekend with me?” God, it would have been so much easier to say no to his invitation via text. Hearing his voice melted all of my resistance. “Yes.” “I’ll pick you up in fifteen minutes.” The excitement in his voice made me laugh. “Hold on, buddy. I’m still at the office.”

“Can’t you duck out early?” “Since it’s a Friday, probably.” “Text me when you get home, and I’ll come over.” “Exactly where are we spending this weekend?” “It’s a surprise.” “Luken, you have to give me a hint otherwise I won’t know what to pack.” “Nothing fancy—shorts, T-shirts. Oh, and don’t forget your bathing suit.” “My what?” Chuckling, he said, “Bathing suit.” “That’s what I thought you said.” A few hours later Luken picked me up, remaining closed lipped about our destination. After being in the car for about twenty minutes, it

became apparent we were headed toward the wealthy part of town with oceanfront mansions and a private marina. “Now would you give me a hint about our final destination?” “My home.” He smiled. I rolled my eyes and huffed. Then shock and horror hit me. Was he taking me to meet his parents? “Um… Luken, please tell me exactly where you’re taking me and if there’s going to be anyone else joining us.” He patted my upper thigh. “Just relax.” My fingers twisted and untwisted in the hem of my cardigan. If I was about to meet his parents at least I had dressed appropriately in my white maxi dress with turquoise chevron stripes and matching

sweater. Pulling up to a big ornate black gate, he waved a keycard in front of a panel and open sesame we were in. Luken parked and after helping me out of the truck, grabbed my overnight bag from the backseat. Taking my hand, he tried to pull me forward, but I didn’t budge. He stopped abruptly. “Hey, come on?” “Be honest with me. Am I about to meet your parents?” “That’s what you’ve been sweating about the entire ride over here?” “Well, you said we were going to your home, and this area is pretty swanky.” “And because of that, you assume I live with my parents?” “That and your expensive truck.”

“Cadence, I don’t live with my parents, and you’re not meeting them this weekend.” “Oh, okay. Whew, I was freaking out a little bit.” “A little bit.” “So are they rich?” “Nope. Why do you ask?” “I just had no idea being a software trainer paid so well.” “It does when you own the company.” He let go of my hand and took off down the dock. With my face pinched in confusion I followed. “You own the company?” “Yep,” he said, grinning. “Why didn’t you tell me?” “It was all in the information packet.” “There was an information packet?”

“The one I placed by each computer the first day of training.” “Oh.” The tiny word was the only thing that pushed through my embarrassment. He slapped his hand over his heart. “I’m shocked, appalled, and brokenhearted.” As we continued down the dock, I tried to get my head around the face that Luken owned the software company. “Here we are! Home sweet home!” He announced. Not paying attention, I bumped right into him as he came to a stop. “You live on a boat?” “Sure do.” I turned my head, and my mouth dropped open. I didn’t know the exact nautical term to describe it, but this was definitely not just a boat. The word

yacht came to mind. “Now that’s a boat. You’re full of surprises.” “Gotta keep you on your toes.” He hopped from the dock to the boat. Sliding my hand into his extended one, he helped me onboard. Still reeling from shock, I got the grand tour of Luken’s home. Down below was decorated tastefully in navy blues, greens, and creams. The main living area had two built in leather sofas, bookshelves, and a desk along with a large flat screen TV. The kitchen was state of the art with stainless steel appliances and granite countertops. He showed me a bathroom and two other small bedrooms before leading me to the master. My breath caught just before entering. I was expecting dirty clothes piled in the corners, an unmade bed,

and empty beer cans strewn about. What I got was a beautiful masculine room decorated in earth tones. The long window above the bed let in a ton of natural light coating the room in a warm glow. My gaze followed as he placed my overnight bag at the foot of the king-size bed. His bed. Unfazed by the implication, he walked toward me. “Let’s head up top. The sunsets over the water are awesome.” “Sounds great.” We made a quick pit stop in the kitchen for wine and beer before heading up. Luken wasn’t exaggerating about the sunsets. The different shades of red, orange, violet, and blue bouncing off the water were awe-inspiring. “It’s absolutely gorgeous,” I said. “Yes, it is.”

Glancing over, I saw his gaze fixed on me. A prickling sensation spread from my head to my toes as I felt the flush of my cheeks. “You must like to make me blush.” “I do.” He ran his thumb over my hot cheek. “Did what’s-his-name make you blush?” This was the perfect opening for me to finally tell him about my diagnosis and Michael. I’d put it off long enough. I sucked on my bottom lip, dragging my teeth across it as I thought about the right words to use. “Michael wasn’t as much of a flirt like you.” Luken’s chest visibly puffed out. “Look, there’s something you should know.” “Is this a sit-down thing?” “Here is fine.” “I’m all ears.”

“There are many reasons why Michael and I aren’t together, which I won’t bore you with right now.” I hesitated for a moment. “But the main reason is two years ago I was diagnosed with breast cancer.” I paused, giving the information time to soak in. His body tensed as shock and fear took over his eyes and expression. The beer bottle slipped from his hand into the water. “Fuck. Are you okay?” A hint of panic laced his question. “I am now. I celebrated my one year anniversary of being cancer free a couple of months ago.” A wave of relief washed over him, and his muscles relaxed. He took the wine glass from me and placed it on the ground before scooping me

into his arms. He was holding me so tight it was hard to catch a breath. “God, the thought of losing you, Cadence…” His voice cracked. I wiggled myself free enough to look up at him. “I’m not going anywhere anytime soon.” “Did that motherfucker leave you because of this?” Taking a step back, I shook my head, and said, “It wasn’t like that. Michael and I had been coasting for a while, but neither of us did anything about it. He stayed by my side all through my treatments. We tried, but by that time we both knew it was time to say goodbye.” “Lucky for me.” The look in his eyes sent shivers through me. Telling him about my diagnosis had changed the

way he looked at me but not how I expected. Luken looked at me as if I were a fine piece of art to cherish. Placing light kisses over my mouth, he coaxed my lips apart. Our tongues did a slow dance, taking the time to explore. Luken’s lips traveled across my jaw to behind my ear. His hands slipped down, cupping my ass and pulling me closer. Grabbing a fistful of his crew neck shirt, I tilted my head to give him more room to work his magic. Every nerve ending in my body was on high alert. In that moment, I wanted him more than anything I’d ever wanted in my life. “Luken…” His name floated out on a breath. “I haven’t been with…” He left my neck and held my gaze. “Don’t think the only reason I asked you here was for that. I

mean, I want you, Cadence, but we won’t do anything you don’t want to do. I meant it when I said, we can go as slow as you need. You set the pace.” “It’s just that… The chemo and radiation did a number on me, namely, the way I see myself. Add in my age and…” A flash of anger crossed his face. “Stop it. You’re beautiful. End of story.” “I’m nervous.” Resting his forehead against whispered, “It’s okay. I’ve got you.”

mine,

he

THE BEDROOM WAS dark except for the moonlight streaming through the window. I thought the lack of light would help calm my nerves, but I was wrong. My knees barely held me steady standing in front of Luken. I was about to be naked,

and cancer or no cancer, there was no way my forty-year-old body could compete with a toned one twenty years younger. Holding my gaze, he reached behind his head and tugged at his collar. His muscles stretched and flexed as he peeled off the shirt, tossing it to the floor. The breath caught in my throat and my fingers tingled to touch him, but I didn’t. I needed him to take the lead tonight. A beam of moonlight hit his chest, revealing every ripple, curve, and indentation. At first, my eyes couldn’t make up their mind where to land, but then I noticed the glimmer of a silver ring piercing his left nipple. “I didn’t know you had a piercing,” I said shyly. “If I’d had my way, you would’ve known sooner.”

Blush. There was something about his piercing that was mesmerizing. Noticing my fascination, Luken said, “You can touch it if you want.” Timidly, I raised my hand and gently ran my fingertips over the ring. My gaze jumped up when I heard his sharp intake of air. Letting my hand fall, I said, “Sorry.” “Don’t be. It’s just… Let’s just say it’s taking everything I got not to rip your clothes off and get you in my bed.” The way he was looking at me and knowing it was a struggle to stay in control had my entire body humming and my heart opening up. Tears pricked the back of my eyes. There was no way I’d ever be able to put into words what this moment

meant to me. Without knowing, Luken had given me a gift that no matter what I said or did, would never be a big enough thank you. I felt wanted and beautiful through his eyes. I hadn’t realized tears were falling until I felt the touch of his finger wiping them away. “Are you okay,” he whispered. I nodded, and that was all he needed. It was as if he read my mind and knew that this was more than me just being nervous about our first time. This was me finally letting go of the cancer patient and finding Cadence Fletcher again. Feeling bolder, I softly kissed his lips before traveling down his neck. When I got to his chest, I made a slight detour over to the piercing, placing a circle of wet kisses around it before gliding my tongue over his nipple.

“Fuck, Cadence! You’re making things harder.” To his credit, Luken held on and let me continue. Staying the course, I made my way down. When I got to his ribcage, I noticed black writing scrolled across the skin. “A tattoo? You’re full of surprises,” I said. There wasn’t enough light coming from the window for me to make out the words. “What does it say?” “Life is made up of moments. If you’re not in one, you’re not living.” “That’s beautiful.” Cupping the sides of my face, he brought our lips together for a slow deep kiss. Ending the kiss, he took a step back, kicked off his shoes, undid his pants, and stepped out of them. The sight of him standing in only his boxers with his dick straining

against them caused my heart to pound so hard against my chest it felt like it was going to shatter at any second. Wasting no time, his fingers threaded through my hair as he tilted my head back. Luken wasted no time slipping his tongue back between my lips. I wanted his hands all over my body and wanted to feel him inside of me. I grabbed the top of his boxers and tugged. Smiling, with his lips still pressed to mine, he said, “Now who’s impatient?” “You have no idea how much I want you.” His lips connected with my hot skin and traveled down my neck. As he paid attention to the spot behind my ear, he slowly slid the cardigan off my shoulders. Goose bumps popped up on every exposed part of my skin.

“I want to see you,” he whispered in my ear, his hot breath flowing over my neck. I gave a slight nod before I stepped back. Focusing on his intense gaze, I slipped out of my shoes. I pushed the straps down and let my dress fall to the floor. I stood frozen in my white lace bra and panties waiting for the verdict. Luken didn’t make any move. Fear hit my stomach the longer he stared. I thought my worst nightmare was coming true. But then I noticed his arm muscles tensing as he flexed his hands while taking in every inch of my body. Holding out his hand, he helped me step out of the pool of fabric. Starting at my collarbone, Luken worked way down, placing a trail of wet kisses over hot skin. My entire body tensed when he got to breasts. He paused, looking into my eyes

his my my for

permission to continue. My fingers melted into his hair as I guided him further. He held my hips steady, licking and sucking down the center of my stomach to the top of my panties. Kneeling, his hands slid over my ass and down the back of my legs, skimming the tip of his nose along my inner thigh. When his mouth pressed between my legs, I thought I was going to collapse. Grabbing onto his shoulders, I was able to steady myself. His lips took the same route on the return trip up my body. Lingering at my stomach, he said, “Your body is incredible.” I was so overwhelmed with sensation and emotion I couldn’t speak. His hands slid to my back, unhooking my bra. I glued my upper arms to my sides in an attempt to keep the lace from falling.

Placing a gentle kiss on the top of each breast, he looked up. “I’ll wait on my knees forever if you need me to.” The intense sincerity in his eyes calmed my nerves. Inhaling a deep breath, I relaxed and let the bra go. He licked his bottom lip as his gaze dropped. “Which one?” “The right one.” My words were barely audible as tears fell down my cheeks. Luken touched my right breast so gently it was as if he were handling a fragile piece of glass. When his lips pressed against it, a jolt of electricity shot through my body, causing my fingers to dig into his shoulders. Slowly swirling the tip of his tongue over every inch of my right breast, he made his way to the center. My nipple

disappeared into his mouth, his tongue rolling over it as he sucked gently. My body was one giant exposed nerve, ready to feel the weight of him on top of it and how it felt to have him inside. “I can’t take much more.” I moaned. My nipple slipped from his mouth. “Am I hurting you?” “No. I need to feel you on me and in me.” Standing, a devilish grin crept across his face. His hands slid into my panties and over my ass, pushing them down my legs. I was completely naked and vulnerable and felt safe and beautiful. As he lifted me, I wrapped my legs around him. His hot skin pressed against my wet pussy almost had me climaxing right then and there. Kissing me slow and deep, he headed toward the bed and laid me down. He took my right ankle in

his hand and nibbled his way up until his face was settled between my legs. Grabbing the comforter, my hands twisted in the material as Luken’s tongue flicked in and out of me. I dug my heels into his back, thrusting my hips up off the bed and against his face. Wave after wave of the most intense pleasure I’d ever experienced washed over me as I screamed incoherently. Before I had a chance to come down from the high, Luken appeared above me. With his hands on either side of my shoulders, he stared down with a mix of hunger and wonderment filling his eyes. Gripping the waistband, I pushed his boxers down. He winced and grunted. “Shit!” Panic flashed through me. “Did I do something wrong?” “No, you’re perfect. I gotta get a condom.”

“Where are they?” “Nightstand.” I wiggled and twisted until I was able to reach over and pull the drawer open. Feeling around, I quickly found what I was hunting for and got back to business. “Can I put it on you?” I asked. He nodded. My gaze stayed locked on his as I ripped open the foil and slid the condom out. I wrapped my hand around the base of his dick. Slowly I moved my hand up, applying slight pressure as my fingernails lightly skimmed over him. A deep growl vibrated from his chest as his arms trembled. Luken watched intently as I rolled the condom on. “Fuck!” he said through clenched teeth.

“Okay?” “Yeah. Cadence, I gotta get inside of you now.” I took his face in my hands and pulled him to my mouth. Our lips moved in perfect sync as his hips rocked into me. The feel of his dick teasing me felt incredible. Propping up on his elbows, he eased himself inside me. There was no pain. No moment of having to get used to the feel of someone new. Like everything else with Luken it felt natural. I tightened my thighs, letting him know it was alright to speed up. If I could, I would have crawled inside of him to be even closer. He shifted his body to the side. Placing his left knee underneath my thigh, he pushed my leg higher and wider. The move was mind-blowing. Luken buried his face in the crook of my neck,

pounding harder and faster into me. “Fuck! I wanna stay inside your pussy forever.” The feel of him throbbing inside me, caused my back to arch off the bed as the pressure began to build. Two more hard thrusts and I exploded. “Luken!” I screamed, my body convulsing underneath him. His movements got more frantic just before his muscles tensed and he came inside of me. With our sweaty bodies stuck together, we laid there in silence while we each tried to catch our breath. After a few minutes, his body shifted. “I’m so fucking happy I found you,” he whispered against my neck. I tightened my hold on him. “Don’t move.” He nibbled his way up my neck and along my jaw until our eyes met. “I’m not going anywhere.”

THE NEXT MORNING my eyes fluttered open at the tickling sensation running down my spine. I squirmed trying to scratch it when I heard a throaty chuckle behind me. Luken’s tongue licked its way from the small of my back up to my neck. Stretching like a cat, I yawned. “Good morning.” “Mmmhmm.” He hummed, tickling my ear. “Get up sleepy head.” “But I’m so comfy. Plus, I have a hot guy making out with my back.” I wiggled my ass against him and immediately felt him get hard. He growled. “Fuck, Sweetheart, keep that up and we’ll never get out of here.”

Between the after effects of last night, how quickly his body responded to me and hearing the term of endearment, I felt like a giddy college coed. Luken playfully slapped my ass before crawling out of bed. “Hey! That’s no way to treat a guest.” “I need my first mate up on deck. We’re taking this baby out on the open seas.” I flipped over and sat up, holding the sheet to my chest. Luken pulled on a pair of red board shorts and a white T-shirt. “We’re going sailing?” He lunged toward me, placing his hands on either side of my hips. “Yes. I can’t wait to fuck you in the middle of the ocean. Now get your beautiful ass up and dressed.”

“Aye, aye, captain.” He stood and grabbed his sunglasses. “Don’t forget to wear your bathing suit.” “I forgot to pack it.” I lied. “Then it’s a good thing I bought you one. It’s in the top drawer.” “How did you know my size?” “Grace is a good friend.” Sliding the sunglasses on, he flashed a bright smiled and left. I wrapped the sheet around my body as I climbed out of bed. I opened the top drawer to find a Victoria’s Secret bag staring back at me. I grabbed the bag and before I had time to talk myself out of it, I put the suit on. It fit perfectly, and I felt comfortable in the turquoise and white floral design boy shorts and solid white high halter top. Even though a lot of

skin was still exposed, I felt covered. Needing a little more time to psyche myself up for the big reveal, I pulled on a pair of shorts and slipped into one of Luken’s hoodies I found in the closet. As I passed through the kitchen, I saw that Luken had already made coffee. I poured myself a mug and headed up to the deck. I was very excited when I found out we were going sailing. This was a weekend of new experiences. When I emerged, Luken was hard at work getting the boat ready to set sail. The breeze rustled through his hair while he untied the boat from the dock. As I watched him go through the routine, thoughts of last night drifted through my head, causing me to shudder. “Hey, sleepy,” he said, pulling the rest of the rope into the boat.

I held up the mug of coffee. “Thank you.” “You’re very welcome.” Cocking an eyebrow, he asked, “Do you have your gift on?” I handed him my mug and unzipped the hoodie giving him a quick peek. “Like it?” “I love it.” Raising up on my toes, I gave him a kiss and took my mug back. “I love you.” The mug started to slip from my hand. Luckily he had fast reflexes, catching it before it fell and setting it aside. I was taken completely off guard by his words. “Luken… I… um…” “You don’t have to say it back. I’ve been wanting to tell you but didn’t want to scare you.” My heart wanted to say it back to him, but my

head kept screaming that it was impossible to feel this way after only a short time. Listening to my heart for the last two weeks had made me happier than I’d been in a long time, though. “I love you, Luken.” His face lit up. “Really?” “It doesn’t make sense but… yes, I do.” “Love doesn’t have to make sense. It just has to be.” Sweeping me up into his arms, he spun me around while squeals of laughter flew out of me. After a few more spins, I slid down his body until my feet landed back on steady ground. “Let’s get out of here. I have plans for this away from port.” He gave my ass a squeeze. Warmth radiated from between my legs to the rest of my body.

“Come on. You’re gonna help me drive this baby,” he said walking toward the front of the boat. “What? Wait! I don’t know how to drive a boat.”

TURNS OUT I wasn’t half bad at captaining the ship. The rest of the day was spent sailing, eating, relaxing, having sex, and getting to know each other better. It was late afternoon, and we were in the middle of nowhere, stretched out soaking in the sun and having a few drinks. I’d gotten brave and hot enough to ditch the hoodie but still had on the shorts. Baby steps.

I took a sip of wine and said, “Tell me about your company? You’re pretty young to have started one and it already is so successful.” “I developed the software junior year in college. By the time I graduated, I had a business plan and took off running. The first year was rough, but I stuck it out with the help of my parents. I kept working my ass off, grabbed some opportunities that came my way, and now I have a company with sixty-five employees so far.” “You’re a regular Bill Gates.” I smiled. “Not yet but maybe someday.” “No maybe’s about it. I predict great things in your future.” A strange expression crossed his face but quickly vanished. I didn’t think much of it at the time. I figured since we were talking about his

company that something about it must have triggered a thought. “I want you to meet my parents.” He blurted out. “Um… do you think that’s such a good idea at this point?” “Why wouldn’t it be?” “Well, we just started this and with the age diff…” His jaw clenched. “I’m not bringing up age as an excuse not to meet your parents. Of course I want to meet them. I’m just saying it might be good to ease them into the idea of me.” “They married eight months after meeting.” “So speed runs in your family.” I teased trying to steer the conversation anywhere other than meeting the parents. Reaching over, he slid his hand to my inner

thigh. “No reason to waste time when we see something we want.” Gripping my hips, he pulled me on top of his body. “You don’t have to meet them tomorrow, but I do want it to be soon.” By the serious tone of his voice, I knew this was very important to him. “Just give me a little more time,” I said. A weak smile crossed his face. I started to move off of him, but he stopped me. “It’s time to drop the shorts.” “I had a feeling that was next on your list.” I teased. His hands roamed to the hem of my shorts. With one quick tug, they slipped over my ass. Wiggling my hips, I pushed the shorts down until they reached my ankles and then kicked them off.

“That’s better,” he said. Draped over Luken’s chest, I rested my cheek against his heart. His hand mindlessly stroked up and down my back while we laid silently listening to the sounds of the ocean. Funny how just two weeks ago I believed this was nothing more than a fling that would fizzle as quickly as it started. But with both of us using the word love and Luken wanting me to meet his family, things were getting very real, very fast. “Cadence, don’t start freaking out already just because I want you to meet my family.” “Why would you think that?” “Because I know you.” He was right. Luken may not have known all my superficial specifics like what were my favorite movies, foods, or colors. But he did know

me, deep down where it counted the most. I ran my hand over his tattoo thinking about the words. “Life is made up of moments. If you’re not in one, you’re not living.” In this moment, my life was perfect. So I decided to live it and put all worries about the future and meeting parents on the back burner.

“I TOLD LUKEN I loved him.” “Hello. This little fling has certainly flung right off the charts.” Grace worked hard to keep the corners of her mouth from twitching into a smile. “You don’t act very surprised.”

“When a guy whisks you away for a romantic weekend it doesn’t take a genius to figure things out. Besides, it’s written all over both your faces and oozing out of every pore of your body.” “Don’t you think it’s fast?” “You and Michael dated for two years before you moved in together and we all know how that turned out. You can’t put a timeframe on falling in love, Caddie.” “Point taken. I know a lot about Luken, but it’s mostly what his life is like now.” “So what if you don’t know every little detail of his past. He’s only twenty-five, how much could there be.” “That’s not funny.” “It’s a little bit funny. Don’t over analyze. You’re the happiest I’ve seen you in a very long

time. It’s nice having the old Caddie back.” I narrowed my eyes at her smirking face. “I swear to god, that was not a crack about your age.”

Luken: Hey, how about I cook for you tonight? Me: You know how to cook? Luken: Is grilling cooking? Me: Yes. Luken: Then YES! Me: Sounds great. It’s almost quitting time. I’ll run home, change, and see you in a bit. Luken: Stay with me tonight.

Warmth radiated throughout my entire body. Me: You don’t have to ask me twice. I’ll see you in a little while. Luken: I love you. Me: I love you. I had just clicked out of the spreadsheet I’d been working on when there was a knock on my office door. “Come in.” “Did I catch you at a bad time?” A familiar deep voice drifted across the room. I looked up to find Michael standing in the doorway with a hesitant look on his face. “You caught me at a perfect time. I’m done for the day.”

Taking the seat across from me, he said, “I was in the neighborhood and thought I’d stop by to see how you’re doing.” A nervous chuckle escaped him. “Is this weird? Because it feels kind of weird.” This was the first time I’d seen or talked to Michael since he moved out. “It feels a little strange, but nice.” “So how are you?” “I’m great actually.” His gaze roamed down the part of my body the desk wasn’t hiding. “You look incredible, Caddie.” “Thank you, so do you.” Reluctantly, he said, “I didn’t just come here to say hi. I need some advice.” “What kind of advice?”

“Now you can tell me to go to hell if this is too…” “Michael, what is it?” “I have a date tonight.” “That’s great.” “Yeah, it’s great except for the fact that I haven’t been on a date in twelve years.” “It’s like riding a bike.” “I feel like some wet behind the ears twentyfive-year-old kid.” Keeping a smile plastered on my face, I said, “You don’t say?” “I mean it. If this is too awkward for you…” “It’s not. In fact, I’m seeing someone.” I couldn’t tell if it was jealousy or concern for a friend that flashed across his face. “Ah, that’s the reason,” he said.

“For what?” “Your radiant glow.” I looked away as my cheeks heated with a blush. “Is it that obvious?” “Only to those within a ten-mile radius of you. What’s his name?” “Luken.” “And what does Luke do for a living?” “Luken has his own financial software company.” “Nice.” He paused for a few seconds. “So tell me about him. He’s obviously smart starting his own company. Is he funny? Trustworthy? Honest?” “Michael…” “Sorry.” His gaze dropped. “It’s just… uh… I still care about you, Caddie.” “I still care about you too. But talking about the

new people in our lives in detail might not be the best topic of conversation right off the bat.” “True.” “Your date… You needed some advice,” I said. “Oh yeah. Do you think it would be okay to take her flowers? I mean, it’s our first date and I don’t want to come off as being too aggressive.” “I’m sure she would love flowers from you.” “Thanks, I appreciate you helping me out.” “That’s what friends are for.” Our eyes locked for a few sentimental seconds. Standing, he said, “I guess I better be going. I need to get to the florist.” Before walking out the door, Michael turned to face me. “Does he treat you well and make you happy?” I gave him a weak smile. “Very.”

A hint of sadness and regret filled his eyes. I knew Michael well enough to know he wasn’t bothered that Luken made me happy. What hurt was the fact that he hadn’t been able to. “It was great seeing you, Caddie.” “It was great seeing you too.” Giving me one last smile, Michael walked out of my office.

SINCE OUR FIRST boat trip a month ago, I had managed to dodge meeting the parents. Luken brought the topic up a few times but never pushed. There was no doubt his family meant the world to him and I could sense him getting impatient with my dodging. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to meet

them. I just didn’t know if I wanted them to meet me. So far there hadn’t been any backlash about our relationship. My friends liked Luken and his friends liked me. There had been a couple of uncomfortable stares from women who were around my age, however, for the most part when we were in public there were more looks of envy that I had such a hot and sweet boyfriend. But family was different and very important to Luken which made it very important to me. I finally accepted the invitation to his family’s weekly Sunday dinner. Fortunately, it was going to be a casual cookout with his parents, his sister, and her husband. Luken kept reassuring me that everyone would love me. It helped keep my nerves in check until the actual day arrived.

We pulled into a long curvy driveway that led to a two-story white Cape Cod style house. I held my sweaty palms in front of the air conditioner vent in hopes that they’d dry before I had to shake anyone’s hand. Before getting out of the truck, Luken turned to me and placed his hand on my knee. “Don’t be so nervous. I love you, so they’ll love you.” I mustered up a faint smile. With my hand in his, Luken led me toward the house. Suddenly, I stopped, remembering I’d brought flowers for his mom and brownies for everyone else. “The flowers and dessert!” I panicked. I ran back and jerked open the passenger door. Stretching, I struggled to reach behind the seat for

the goodies. Luken came up behind me chuckling. “What?” “You’re so damn adorable when you’re nervous.” I narrowed my eyes. “Make yourself useful and carry this, please.” I handed him the tray of my double chocolate brownies. We hadn’t even made it to the first step when the front door swung open and a beautiful, tall, and slender woman stepped out. She had the same light brown hair and piercing blue eyes as Luken. “The prodigal son returns,” Jen said, smiling. “Thanks, Sis. Great seeing you too.” Luken gave his sister a one arm hug before turning to me. “Jen, this is Cadence.” I held out my hand. “Everyone calls me Caddie.” There was a loud throat clearing beside

me. “Except for your brother.” “God knows I wouldn’t want to step on his thing. So happy to finally meet you, Caddie. Put that hand away. We’re huggers.” Putting her arms around my shoulders, she gave me a warm embrace. “Come on in. Dad and Derek are arguing.” “Again?” Luken asked. I was nervous enough. A family argument certainly didn’t help matters. I looked at Luken. “Maybe now is not a good time to do this.” Jen waved her hand. “Those two have the same silly heated discussion all the time. To stack or spread the charcoal.” Placing his hand on the small of my back, Luken ushered me forward. “It’s all in good fun.”

“Yeah, if we’re lucky we might eat before the year is over.” Jen teased. As I entered the house, I noticed the two siblings weren’t right behind me. “How are things?” Luken asked Jen, keeping his voice low. “Today is an okay day.” I was curious to know what they were talking about. Luken hadn’t mentioned anything serious going on with his family. “Jen, can you put this in the kitchen. I want to go introduce Cadence to everyone.” “Sure. Caddie, wine?” “Yes, please.” She took the tray of brownies and headed in the opposite direction. Taking my free hand, Luken led me through the

house and out into a big backyard where his dad and brother-in-law were in deep conversation by the grill. “Now the fun can start!” Luken announced, all eyes focused on us as we stepped onto the patio. “Get your ass over here and talk some sense into your dad.” Walking toward us with a beer in each hand, Jen’s husband met us in the middle of the patio. “Hey, I’m Derek.” He handed Luken a beer. “Caddie,” I said. Draping an arm around my shoulders, Derek guided me over to the grill. “I’m so glad you’re here, Caddie. We need an impartial party to weigh in on this situation.” “I’m not very qualified.” I glanced at Luken who held up his hands in surrender, smirking.

“Dad, this is Caddie,” Derek said. Rushing up, Luken peeled Derek’s arm from around me. “Back off, dude. You’re stealing my thunder. I get to introduce the woman I love to my dad.” I was taken back by Luken’s openness about his feelings in front of his dad. “Nice to meet you, Mr. Schaffer.” I felt odd calling him Mr. Schaffer, even with his salt and pepper hair he didn’t look much older than me, but I didn’t want to be presumptuous. “It’s Tom. So glad my son brought you out of hiding.” “I appreciate you inviting me.” “We’re a pretty laid-back crowd. Make yourself at home.” I didn’t detect anything in his voice that led me

to believe he had a problem with me dating his son. In fact, being here felt as natural as it did being with Luken. I’d met three out of the four family members and they couldn’t have been more welcoming. In true Cadence fashion, thoughts started swirling. Were they all being nice because they knew what was coming? Was Momma Schaffer a beast? I’d always heard mothers and sons have a very special bond. The knots that had loosened slightly twisted tighter. “Where’s Mom?” “She went inside for something,” Tom said. A second later an older version of Jen walked out of the house. The only difference was her eyes were light green. Luken met his mom at the bottom of the steps and gave her a hug. “Come over here, I want you to meet

someone.” With a huge grin on his face, he guided his mom toward me. “Mom, this is Cadence.” “Nice to meet you, Mrs. Schaffer.” “It’s Terri and nice to finally meet you too.” No raised brow, no pursed lip, not a trace of disdain on her face. “Thank you for having me over.” Realizing I was still holding the flowers, I said, “Oh, these are for you.” “They’re beautiful. I’ll go put them in water.” Before stepping inside the house, she called back. “Luken, she’s a keeper.” A smug and satisfied expression crossed his face. “Told ya. You okay here for a minute? I’ll be right back.” “Yeah, I’m fine.” He placed a kiss on my forehead before heading inside, no doubt to get the

true lowdown on what the females of the family thought of me. “Caddie, would you tell this fool the charcoal needs to be spread out for even grilling,” Tom said. Before I could answer Jen appeared carrying a tray with wine, cheese, and fruit. “Don’t get our guest involved in y’all’s ridiculousness.” Tilting her head she motioned for me to follow her over to the large rustic farmhouse table and chairs. After handing the wine off to me, she moved several bowls and dishes around to make room for the platter among the other appetizers. The amount of food they had prepared was enough to feed an army. “Every time we cook out they go through the same argument. That’s why we have lots of booze

and snacks. Settle in. We’re gonna be here for a while.” Taking a seat across from her, I asked. “Is this the house you and Luken grew up in?” “Yeah. My parents have remodeled it a couple of times. Added updates. It was a great place to grow up.” “The yard is beautiful.” The backyard was huge with azaleas and rose bushes lining the privacy fence. A large oak tree sat in the center of the yard surrounded by a bed of vibrant colored flowers. “That’s pretty much Mom’s handiwork. She used to love gardening.” Jen took a sip of her wine. I was about to ask Jen why her mom stopped gardening when Luken appeared with her and a

vase with the flowers I’d brought. He sat next to me while his mom placed the vase in the center of the table. “These flowers are gorgeous. I just love picking fresh flowers from my garden.” At first, her phrasing struck me as odd. It sounded like she thought the flowers were from her own garden. Neither Luken nor Jen reacted so I figured I must have misheard. Terri looked at me with a warm smile across her pale pink lips. “Oh, hello, I’m Terri. What’s your name, sweetheart?” Luken and Jen exchanged a look before turning their gaze on my confusion. “Mom, this is Cadence, my girlfriend.” He gently held her hand. “My name is pretty unusual. Caddie might be

easier to remember.” “It’s very nice to meet you, Caddie.” She gave me another warm smile before joining her husband. Pushing away from the table, Jen announced. “I’m gonna go put the potatoes in the oven.” I didn’t even have to ask the question. “My mom has Alzheimer’s,” Luken said. My heart plummeted to the pit of my stomach. I reached over and placed my hand on his. “My god, Luken. I’m so sorry. Why didn’t you tell me?” “I know you have questions but later… okay? Let’s just enjoy being with my family.” And that’s exactly what we did. The rest of the night was filled with good food, good wine, wonderful people, and lots of laughs. Now that I knew about Terri’s condition I picked up on little ways in which her family helped without

embarrassing her. The evening ended with a round of hugs and an invitation to come back as often as I wanted. We drove back to the boat in silence. I couldn’t imagine what it must be like to watch a loved one struggle with Alzheimer’s. Once onboard we sat side by side under the stars. The slight breeze rustled his hair, as Luken gazed out over the water, a melancholy expression draped over his face. I could feel the loneliness radiating off of him. Without a word, I crawled into his lap and wrapped my arms around him. If all he wanted to do was sit in silence that was okay with me. I placed a soft kiss on his neck. “You don’t have to talk if you don’t want to.” His arms slipped around my waist and held me

tight against his chest. “Sometimes I forget she’s sick. I mean, she doesn’t look any different. But we can be talking and she’ll stop in mid-sentence. There’ll be a flash of confusion in her eyes and I can tell she doesn’t know who I am. It only lasts a split second, but it’s there.” I snuggled in closer. “The symptoms started nine months ago. At first, none of us thought anything of it. Everyone forgets where they put things from time to time. Then one day Dad got a call from the police. Mom had a spell while she was shopping for groceries. The store manager saw her wandering the parking lot. He went out to help, thinking she’d just forgotten where she’d parked the car. She was so disoriented, he didn’t know what to do so he called the police. That’s when we knew it wasn’t

just the normal run of the mill forgetting where the car keys were.” Tears stung my eyes and I held him even tighter. “After a ton of tests, the doctor said it was a genetic mutation on Mom’s side of the family. Turns out my Grandad and his two brothers suffered from it. It’s funny, the family thought they were all just flaky as they got older.” I pulled back and rested my forehead against his. “There’s a blood test that can detect whether a person has the gene.” He blinked back tears. “Jen and Derek have been trying to get pregnant, so she wanted to know.” “And?” “She’s a carrier, which means there’s a fifty

percent chance of passing it onto her children.” The words stuck in his throat. The thought of his beautiful, smart, and kind sister finding out that by her mother’s age she could be sinking into the same disease was almost too much to bear. Then like a fucking bolt of lightning, I thought of Luken. I didn’t want to ask the question because I was terrified of the answer. He read my mind. “I don’t know. I didn’t get tested.” In that moment it became clear why he’d been working so hard over the past year to build up his company, why he was impatient for me to meet his family, and why he wasn’t afraid of how quickly our relationship developed. It also explained the words tattooed on his side. Luken was trying to pack as much living into every moment.

I choked back a sob. “Why don’t you want to know?” “Why bother? So I can spend the next twenty years being scared shitless when each New Year passes? Then wonder if every time I lose my keys, it’s the beginning of the end? I can’t live like that, Cadence.” “I love you more than I ever thought was humanly possible,” I said, choking back a sob. His hands traveled up my back and into my hair as he pressed his lips to mine. I wrapped myself around his body and held on. I’d spent the last fifteen years of my life helping clients plan for their financial future. I told people every day how much to set aside and what investments would yield the highest return. If they do this then a secure future was guaranteed. So

they make sacrifices. They work harder and longer, skipping family dinners and vacations, believing that there’ll be time later to catch up. True no one is guaranteed a future but how many of us deep down believe that? It’s all theory and conjecture. Here in my arms was a young man who had a very real question mark on his future and I had nothing for him. Neither my fifteen-year head start, my future planning abilities, nor surviving cancer made me any wiser. At the age of twenty five, does a person live their life on conjecture or live with the knowledge that something beyond their control will rob them of not only their future but their past as well.

I DON’T KNOW how long Luken and I stayed up on deck holding each other before finally heading below to bed. We didn’t talk anymore on the topic. All I wanted was for us to disappear into our little world where I could protect him. After making

love, we remained quiet, staring into each other’s eyes until he drifted off to sleep. I, on the other hand, couldn’t fall asleep so easily after finding out he had a fifty/fifty chance of inheriting the Alzheimer’s gene, so I wanted to spend the rest of the night researching the disease. When I was sure Luken was in a deep sleep, I slipped out of bed and headed up to the deck of the boat with my iPhone in hand. I prayed that I’d find information on a successful treatment plan. I wasn’t naïve enough to think there was a cure, but maybe there was new evidence that a combination of drugs would slow the disease down to the point that it barely had an effect at all. I had to do some math to estimate Terri’s age. Since Luken and Jen were twenty-five, I guessed her to be at least forty five to fifty, and like Tom,

she didn’t look much older than me. I typed in every possible combination of words and clicked on every article, searching for even an ounce of hope. There were medications proven to have some success in combating the progression of the disease, but none that would stop or cure it. When I turned my focus on learning about the gene itself, what I found shattered my heart completely. Since Terri was diagnosed at what was considered to be a young age for the disease, the chances were high that Jen and Luken, if he had the gene, would start showing symptoms at the same age their mother did. The age at which the second chapter of your life should be starting. A time to relax and enjoy the accomplishments you’ve achieved in life, career, and family.

After reading that and feeling dejected and completely helpless, I decided to put my phone away and crawl back into bed. The moonlight filtered through the window softly lighting Luken’s face. Looking at him, I thought back to when I was twenty-five. I had just gotten my job at the bank and rented my first apartment without having to have roommates. I was a strong independent young woman excited about her life and future. At that time I didn’t know the specifics but knew someday, I’d settle down with the man of my dreams, buy a house, and start a family. Of course it didn’t work out that way, but at least I was given the chance. Raising my hand, I gently brushed the hair from Luken’s forehead before sliding further under the covers. Without opening his eyes, he turned toward me, draping his arm over my hips and nuzzling my

neck. “I love having you in my life,” he whispered before drifting back to sleep. I stared at the ceiling, wracking my brain until the sun came up, thinking of ways to give Luken his chance. The next day every time I looked at him, I had to fight the tears from falling. We had taken the boat out for the afternoon, and I wanted nothing more than for us to sail as far away from the cloud that followed him. With my overnight bag slung over my shoulder, I walked up on deck. As I turned the corner, I saw him talking with a dark haired boy who looked to be around eight years old. The boy listened intently as Luken explained how to secure the boat. Once they had completed the job together, pride and joy

radiated off both of them. The corners of my mouth curled up into a smile with the thought of Luken teaching his own son how to sail. My stomach clenched with the sudden realization that I wouldn’t be able to give him that moment. My brown eyes weren’t the only thing I got from my mom. Whatever slight chance I had of being able to get pregnant was completely wiped away by the chemo. The sound of Luken calling my name snapped me out of my thoughts. “Hey, Cadence come meet my friend Charlie.” “Hey, Charlie.” “You have a funny name,” the little boy said. “It is kind of funny.” “But I like it.” He gave me a big toothy grin. “Charlie!” A blonde woman called as she walked toward us. “Charlie, are you bothering

these nice people?” “No, Mom. Luken let me help tie off the boat. He said he’d show me around if it was okay with you and Dad.” Charlie’s mom smiled politely. “I’m sorry. He doesn’t know a stranger. I’m Cindy Foster. My husband and I have a boat two slips down.” Luken walked over and stood by my side. “I’ve seen your boat. It’s gorgeous.” “Mom, this is Cadence.” Impressed, I said, “Very good. You’re the only person who’s remembered my name after hearing it only once.” “Nice to meet y’all. I hope my son didn’t take up too much of your time. Come on, your dad is waiting for us.” “But Mom I want to see the boat.”

“I’ll give you the tour one day soon, Buddy.” “Promise?” “Scout’s honor.” Luken crossed his heart. “Cool!” “Thank you. Have a good evening,” Cindy said, guiding her son down the dock. As I watched them walk away, a soft kiss landed on my shoulder. “Earth to Cadence.” “Huh? Oh, sorry.” “You okay?” “Yeah. A little too much sun, I guess.” Snaking his arms around my waist, he kissed my neck. “Stay with me tonight.” I relaxed into him. “I have work tomorrow, and I didn’t bring anything to change into.” “So I’ll run you home to grab some clothes.”

“I need to catch up on a few bills and laundry. And I couldn’t tell you the last time I cleaned my place.” “Okay. I can play catch up with work. Have dinner with me tomorrow?” “Sure,” I whispered. The entire ride home I tried to act present and not distracted, but my thoughts kept drifting to Luken and Charlie.

SITTING AT MY DESK, I continued to stare at the same document that had been in front of me for the past hour. I’d been completely useless since walking in the door this morning. Last night, alone in my condo my thoughts kept spinning with ways

to help Luken. But no matter what popped into my head, I kept coming back to the same conclusion. Poking her head in my office, Grace said, “Lunch today?” “What?” “Lunch. Today.” “I don’t think so.” She stepped inside, closed the door, and sat across from me. “Talk.” “About what?” “About whatever has you looking like a zombie who just lost its bloody human snack.” I looked up at her with puffy red eyes. “My god, you even have zombie eyes. What’s wrong?” “I met Luken’s family this weekend.”

“Bastards?” I shook my head. “They couldn’t have been nicer and more welcoming.” “Fantastic! You passed the family test. So what’s got you so glum?” I choked back a sob. “Luken’s mom has Alzheimer’s.” “Fuck.” “She’s not that much older than us.” “Double fuck.” “It runs in their family, Grace. His sister, Jen, has the gene.” “Fuck infinity and beyond. And Luken?” “He opted out of the test.” “There’s something more you’re not telling me.” “I love him so much, Grace.” I paused, trying

to brace myself before I admitted what I had to do. “I need to let him go.” “What are you talking about?” “Yesterday at the marina, Luken was showing a little boy how to dock the boat. He was fantastic with him. You know I can’t give him that future.” “Caddie, you don’t even know if he wants that future.” “But he deserves that option. And if he has the gene… I want him to have as much time as possible to enjoy his children.” As my resolve broke, sobs poured out of me. Wrapping her arms around my shoulders, Grace pulled me into a hug, and let me cry until I was cried out.

I WAS IN no condition to be any good at work for the rest of the day, so I decided to leave early. Before going home, I texted Luken. Me: Hey, not feeling well. A stomach bug, I

think. Rain check on dinner? Luken: I’ll come take care of you. Me: No. I don’t want you to catch it. I’ll be fine. Going to sleep it off. Luken: Call me if you need anything. I’ll check on you later. I love you. My heart plummeted as my finger hovered over the screen. Me: I love you beyond words. I’d convinced myself that the only reason I held on to the stomach bug excuse was because it bought me enough time to think about how I was going to break things off. In reality, I was just stalling. I regretted that my relationship with

Michael had ended, but if I were being honest, I never had a problem picturing my life without him even after being together for twelve years. I felt like a bitch even thinking this, but it was the truth. Luken was another story. I’d didn’t even know he existed twelve weeks ago. And now I found myself unable to imagine getting through an entire day without him much less the rest of my life. Over the course of the next few days, I kept up the charade. Fortunately, with my job I was able to work from home, thus avoiding the chance of Luken dropping by my office unannounced. When he called, I let it go to voicemail, and sent a text that I felt too sick to talk. I knew I’d crumble if I heard his voice. I just needed time away from him to build up enough courage to say goodbye. As my responses to his texts took longer and my texts got

shorter, he knew something was up. He tried pumping Grace for information, but all she told him was to give me a few days. Friday night I was back to my old routine of sitting home alone mindlessly flipping through channels. It had been five days since I’d seen him and the time apart hadn’t done a damn thing except make me feel even more miserable. I could survive six more rounds of chemo better than hat I was going through now. I had decided to give up on finding anything on TV to distract me. As I opened my Kindle a loud banging rocked the door, causing me to jump out of my skin. Earlier today Grace mentioned that she and Clayton wanted to come over for a girl’s night to get my mind off of things. I told them no, but as usual, my friends didn’t listen. I shuffled to the

door and opened it without checking who it was first. I froze in place, my chest tightening at the sight of an angry and distraught Luken. “We need to talk.” I gave a weak cough. “I’m still sick. I don’t want…” “I don’t give a fuck if I catch the fucking bubonic plague.” He pushed past me and into my condo. With his hands curled into fists and his jaw clenched, Luken paced in the middle of the room. I had to do this as quickly as possible. Like ripping off a Band-Aid. “Do you want to sit down?” I asked, closing the door. He stopped pacing and pierced me with his intense gaze. “What I want is for you to tell me

what the fuck is going on.” I wasn’t ready. I needed more time. “Nothing, I told you I caught some type of bug.” “Bullshit! Things have been incredible, and then you just stop everything—seeing me, taking my calls, responding to my texts. At the very least, you owe me an explanation.” I needed something to grab onto, so I walked to the end of the sofa, standing only a few feet away from him. “I… um… need… uh… you to listen to me.” I stammered, digging my fingers into the cushion. No response. He just stared and waited. “Never in my life did I think I’d meet someone that would consume my heart like you have.” Tears were brewing behind my eyes. “The past six

weeks have been like a dream.” “Then why are you ignoring me?” “We need to take a step back.” God, I’m such a chicken shit. “Where is this coming from?” His words were clipped. “You deserve the chance to have a full life, and I can’t give that to you.” “What the fuck does that mean?” “I can’t give you a family, Luken.” “I have a family.” “You know what I mean. I’m not able to have children.” “So what. I’ve never thought about having kids.” “Of course you haven’t because you’re twentyfive. But what about when you’re twenty-eight or

thirty?” He took a step toward me. “Cadence, I want to spend the rest of my life with you.” I gripped the cushion tighter and tried to keep my voice steady. “Two years ago when I heard the doctor say the words breast cancer, the first and only thought that came into my head was that I was going to die. It didn’t matter that there were advances in treatment or that I personally knew women who had survived. I got lost during treatment. I didn’t look like myself. I didn’t feel like myself. I thought everything would go back to normal after it was all over. I waited a year, but it never happened. I’d get so pissed off at myself because surviving cancer was supposed to give you a new and brighter outlook on life. I tried. But the more I pretended, the more I realized that the

chemo not only killed the cancer in my body, but it also killed my heart and soul too. I was just a shell. Then I met you. The electricity between us was such a jolt to my system, it was as if someone had plugged me back into the universe. We didn’t talk about cancer or chemo appointments. And the way you looked at me and touched me, made me feel beautiful and sexy.” “You are beautiful and sexy. Cadence, I love you.” “I love you too, and that’s why I have to let you go. If you have the Alzheimer’s gene and I pray to God that you don’t. But if you do, you need time to meet and fall in love with a girl your age. Someone you can build a life with and have children with. I want you to have as much time as possible to love her and your children. Luken, you gave me back my

life and now it’s my turn to give you yours.” “I’ll get tested.” I shook my head. “No, you made the decision that was best for you.” Tears filled his eyes. “If it meant you’d stay in my life, I’d do it.” “You can’t do it because of me.” “You know we belong together. That life you described is not my dream, Cadence. A life with you is my dream. Everything else comes in a distant second.” “You feel that way now, but once you stop hurting, you’ll be able to look at this with a clear head, and realize it’s for the best. Then you can move on.” “I’ll never move on from you because you’re it for me. Please don’t do this.”

I knew if I didn’t end this at that moment, I’d cave. I was clutching the cushion so tight my hand was cramping. I held his gaze and said, “You need to leave.” Boring into me, his bright blue eyes turned dark before he stormed out. The slam of the door was like a bullet to my heart. I collapsed to the floor as my body convulsed into sobs.

FOR THE NEXT two days I didn’t eat, sleep, or answer the phone. I barely got out of bed. The second Luken walked out of my life, I transformed back into a shell. I’d cried so much that my body, mind, and spirit were completely numb. I kept

telling myself that letting him go was the best thing. No matter how much pain I was in, his happiness and having a fulfilled life was more important. But my mantra wasn’t working. Monday morning, as my finger hovered over my phone to call in sick to work, there was a pounding on my door. I dragged myself out of bed. Looking through the peephole, a pissed off Grace looked back. I was heading back to my bedroom when the sound of the lock clicking and the door opening stopped me. I’d forgotten she had a key. “Stop right there.” She ordered. I didn’t bother turning around. “Okay, I’ve given you your space. Now it’s time to get your ass in gear.” “Just leave me alone, Grace.” “Call him, Caddie.”

Crawling onto the sofa, I said, “I can’t.” She went into the kitchen and made herself some coffee. “Cancer was such a waste on you.” “Whatever.” “I can’t understand it. You went through grueling treatment, lost your hair, and the man you thought you’d spend the rest of your life with is gone. And for what? You didn’t learn a fucking thing from the experience.” “You don’t know what you’re talking about.” She plopped herself in my overstuffed chair. “I know my best friend had been missing for two years. She finally came back six weeks ago when she found the love of her life, who, by the way, is completely destroyed over losing her.” “He’ll recover and see that it was for the best.”

“But will you?” “Grace…” She slapped the side of my leg. “Get up. Clayton’s meeting us at Saffrons for breakfast.” “I’m not hungry. Besides, don’t ya’ll have work to do?” “It’s a holiday. So chop, chop.” I ignored her and stayed put. “Caddie, if you don’t get up and get dressed right this minute I will call Clayton over here to deal with this situation.” The only thing worse than Grace’s “help” was Clayton’s relentless nagging. I dragged myself into the sitting position. “I’m up.” I emerged from my bedroom ten minutes later wearing black yoga pants, an orange T-shirt, and sneakers.

Grace looked me up and down. “Gee, thanks for the effort.” I shoved my phone into my purse. “Don’t push it.” “It’s a beautiful day outside. We’ll eat out on the patio. The fresh air and warm sun will do you a world of good,” Grace said, placing her hands on my shoulders and pushing me out the door. Clayton was already at the café when Grace and I arrived. The three of us placed our orders and took a table on the patio facing the quaint and busy street in the historic district. I stared blankly ahead at the people passing by. “Caddie, what do you think I should do?” Clayton asked. I glanced at him. “About what?” “Cute new teller Eddie asked me out.”

“What about Ricardo?” “Ricardo’s being a bitch, taking me for granted.” “And?” I said, focusing back toward the street. “And I’m not sure if Eddie’s such a good idea since we work together.” “I vote no. It could get very sticky if you start up something.” Grace chimed in. “God, I hope so.” Having tuned out my friends, I continued to stare straight ahead, not paying attention to anything specific until I saw Luken’s mom, Terri. She was across the street at the crosswalk. The light changed, but she didn’t move from her spot. As people whooshed past, her head turned from side to side as if she was looking for something or someone. Then it dawned on me, she didn’t know

where she was. I jumped up from the table. “I’ll be right back.” “Where are you going?” Clayton hollered. “Luken’s mom is across the street. I think she needs help,” I said, glancing over my shoulder. I was halfway across the sidewalk when suddenly Terri stepped off the curb and right into oncoming traffic. Horns blared, tires screeched, and people screamed. As if in slow motion a yellow cab slammed into an oblivious Terri. I raced over to her as fast as my legs would carry me. The cab driver, visibly shaken, got out of his car and ran up with his cell phone pressed to his ear. Terri let out one bloodcurdling scream after another. Kneeling beside her, I said, “Terri, it’s Caddie, Luken’s friend. Can you hear me?”

“The ambulance is on its way. God, she came out of nowhere. I didn’t even see her,” the driver said. Touching the side of her face, I tried once again to get her to focus on me. “Terri, look at me.” Her light green eyes filled with fear and confusion found mine. “Everything’s going to be okay. I’m here.” A flash of recognition crossed her face. “Caddie?” “Yeah, it’s me.” “You make my son very happy.” I blinked back tears as the roar of sirens filled the air. The EMT’s quickly ushered me to the side as they began to assess Terri’s injuries. “She has Alzheimer’s.” I told them. Out of nowhere Grace and Clayton were on

either side of me. Clayton wrapped his arm around my shoulders. “It’s a good sign she didn’t lose consciousness.” Just then a police officer appeared in front of us. “Do any of you know the victim?” “Her name is Terri. Terri Schaffer.” I looked over his shoulder, keeping an eye on what the EMTs were doing. “I need your name and how you know Ms. Schaffer.” “Cadence Fletcher. I’m a family friend. And it’s Mrs. Schaffer.” “Ms. Fletcher, can you tell me what happened?” “I need to let her son know what happened,” I said. “The family will be contacted. I just have a

few questions.” I glanced at Grace and she took the cue. “I’ll call him.” Grace pulled her cell phone from her jacket pocket and stepped away while I filled the officer in on what happened. As the EMTs were rolling Terri toward the ambulance, I rushed over to ask, “Is she going to be okay?” “She’s stable right now.” “Which hospital are you taking her to?” “Saint Mary’s is the closest. You can follow us over there.” I caught Terri’s gaze one last time before they loaded her into the back of the ambulance. I couldn’t tell if she recognized me or not. The doors closed and the ambulance drove off as Grace

walked up. “Luken’s phone went straight to voicemail. I told him the basics of what happened and to meet you at Saint Mary’s.” “I need to… um… go. I don’t want her to be scared surrounded by strangers. Fuck, I left my purse…” Clayton handed it to me. “Shit, I don’t have my car.” Holding up her keys, Grace said, “Take mine.” Giving her an appreciative smile, I grabbed the keys. I wrapped both my arms around their shoulders, pulling them in for a group hug. “Thank you guys so much.” “Get out of here.” Grace pushed me back. “Let us know how she is as soon as you can.” I took a couple of steps back and nodded

before turning and running to the car. When I pulled into the ER parking lot, they were just taking Terri out of the ambulance. I wasn’t sure of her mental state, but I wanted her to see a familiar face just in case. I followed closely behind as they rolled her through the entrance. Once inside they took her straight through a set of double doors and out of sight. I found an empty corner with a good view of both the entrance and the doors Terri disappeared behind. I wanted to have all the bases covered. Jen was the first to arrive, bursting through the entrance and straight to the nurse’s station. I didn’t know what her reaction would be finding me here. She and Luken were very close, no doubt he’d told her how I broke his heart. As I walked in her direction, her head turned

toward me. Jen’s blue eyes changed from fear to relief at the sight of me. Without exchanging a word, we enveloped each other in a hug. “Caddie, thank god you’re here.” “I’m so sorry. If I’d only gotten to her quicker.” Jen pulled back. “Wait, you saw it happen?” “I was across the street. She looked lost. She was awake and recognized me for a brief minute before the ambulance came. My friend Grace tried to contact Luken, but it went straight to voicemail.” “I got a hold of him. He and Dad are on their way.” She paused. “Derek is out of town on business. Would you mind staying with me?” “Of course, I don’t mind.” Jen and I claimed a couple of empty seats and waited. After a few minutes of awkward silence, she

said, “Luken told me what happened.” She didn’t sound angry. I didn’t know how to respond so I just sat there. “He stayed with Derek and me over the weekend. I’ve never seen him this way before.” An ache spread across my chest. “I never meant to hurt him.” “I’m sure by now you’ve discovered Luken is not your typical twenty-five-year-old. He’s so much like Dad it’s scary. My brother doesn’t go into things blindly. He knows exactly what he wants. And he never questions his decisions.” “I want him to have a chance at the life he always dreamed of having.” She nodded in agreement. “He did up until a few days ago.” Looking down at my fidgeting hands in my lap,

I was at a loss for words. Each time the entrance to the ER opened, I glanced up nervously but hopeful. I just needed to see him one last time before I left. After sitting with Jen in silence for about fifteen minutes, the energy in the crowded ER changed. I didn’t have to look up to know Luken had just walked through the doors. Lifting my gaze, I was met by a pair of intense and heartbroken blue eyes. He looked as if he hadn’t slept in days, but was still as handsome as ever with a light beard peppering his strong jawline. Jen jumped to her feet, making a beeline into her father’s arms. I hesitated for a moment before walking over to them. I didn’t want to make things more awkward, but I wanted them to know how sorry I was that I hadn’t gotten to Terri sooner. I had taken only a few steps when Tom rushed over

and pulled me into a hug. “Caddie, thank god you were there with Terri,” he said. I peered over Tom’s shoulder to find Luken staring directly at me. Our eyes locked for several seconds before I forced myself to look away as I stepped out of Tom’s arms. “I’m so sorry I didn’t get to her sooner.” “No apology needed. I’m just thankful you were there, and she wasn’t alone.” “Please let me know how she is when you find out… If you don’t mind.” Before Tom could answer a doctor came out looking for the family. “Schaffer family?” “Yes,” Tom said. “I’m Dr. Cook.” The doctor and Tom shook

hands. “Your wife has a mild concussion with a nasty bruise on her forehead. She also fractured her right wrist and three ribs. Other than that, she’s going to be just fine.” A collective sigh of relief filled the air. “I want to keep her overnight for observation. She’ll be able to go home sometime tomorrow.” Tom’s body visibly relaxed. “Thank you so much, Doctor. Can we see her?” “Absolutely. In fact, she’s been asking for all four of you. So Tom, Luken, Jen, and Caddie, head on back before I get in trouble.” Dr. Cook patted Tom on the shoulder before he walked away. I was touched, shocked, and confused that Terri included me. I had no intention of making everyone uncomfortable by joining them. Just as I was about

to say my goodbyes, Jen hooked her arm around mine, and we followed Tom down the hallway with Luken not far behind. Once we got to Terri’s room, I held back in the doorway so that the family could share a private moment. Luken and Jen took turns giving their mother long hugs, whispering something to her. I was too far away to hear, but by the look on Terri’s face, I had no doubt they each said how much they loved her. Tom wasted little time sitting next to his wife and taking her uninjured hand in his. There was no hiding the way he felt. The love in his eyes as he looked at Terri took my breath away. My chest tightened with the realization that it was the exact same way Luken looked at me. Terri took her hand and ran it down the side of Tom’s face, attempting to smooth out the worried

expression. “I’m going to be fine.” Blinking away tears, he struggled to hold on to his composure. “I know,” he said, placing a gentle kiss on her lips. Luken and Jen looked at the sweet affection between their parents with a hint of sorrow in their eyes, knowing these moments would become fewer as Terri’s condition deteriorated. “Do you need anything?” Tom asked. Terri raised her eyebrows and smirked. “I’d kill for a Diet Pepsi and a bag of M&Ms.” “I knew that was coming. I’ll be right back.” Tom gave her a quick peck on the lips before sliding off the bed. Terri’s gaze followed him as he passed by me and out the door. “Caddie!” she said, holding up her uninjured

arm. Before making a move, I glanced at Luken for permission. He gave me a slight nod and then looked away. “Thank you,” Terri said, as she hugged me. “I’m so happy you’re going to be alright.” “I’m so thrilled to have you in our family. Luken, don’t you ever let her go.” With his gaze laser focused on me, he said, “I won’t, Mom.” Either Terri was having one of her spells or Luken hadn’t told his parents we’d broken up. I bit my bottom lip to keep it from trembling. The room was closing in and suffocating me. I had to get out of there. I inhaled a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I’ll check in on you tomorrow.” I glanced over at

Jen standing next to her brother. “If you need anything don’t hesitate to call me.” As hard as I tried to avoid it, my gaze locked with Luken’s for a second before I turned and left the room. I quickly walked down the hallway, holding my emotions in until I was in the privacy of my car. Passing the empty waiting room, I noticed Tom sitting in a corner chair with his head down and his shoulders shaking. Without giving it a second thought, I made my way over to him. Placing my hand on top of his shoulder, I said, “Tom, are you okay?” He looked up with tears in his eyes. “I will be.” I sat down in the chair next to him. “Terri’s going to be okay.”

He nodded, wiping the tears from his face. “I spend so much time and energy preparing myself for what our future is going to be like, it never occurred to me that I could lose her in a split second. Isn’t that ridiculous?” “I don’t think so.” “The second she walked into my family’s custom boat business, I knew I was in trouble.” “Love at first sight.” “Oh yeah. At that time, I wasn’t sure about anything in my life except Terri.” “I bet she was happy she walked into that boat shop that day,” I said. “Nah, she didn’t want to have anything to do with me.” “You’re kidding? Why?” “I was a nineteen-year-old punk working for

his dad, and she was a twenty-nine-year-old career woman serious about settling down and starting a family.” “I didn’t know there was a ten year age gap between the two of you.” “It’s not as obvious now because Terri still looks amazing and somewhere along the way I started looking old. So we’ve kind of met in the middle now.” “So how did you convince her to take a chance on that nineteen-year-old punk?” “Her father had hired us to design a sailboat. She stopped by the shop that day to pick up the plans. I was able to finagle a little information like where she worked and the places she liked to hang out. Then I just started showing up. Not in a creeper way, mind you. I was consistent and

persistent.” “Now I know where Luken gets it from.” A proud grin crossed his face. “He is a chip off the old block.” “How long was it before you wore Terri down?” “Four months. She was stubborn. But in the end, she realized that, despite the age difference, we were meant to be. You know, even with the diagnosis, I still consider those four months without her the worst time of my life.” I reached over and touched his arm. Tom didn’t say anything for several seconds, but I sensed he wanted to. He took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Luken told me about the breakup,” he said, a little hesitant.

“I never meant to hurt him. I just want what’s best for him.” “Luken thinks you are what’s best for him.” “If he ends up having…” I swallowed a sob. “When we started letting family and friends know about the Alzheimer’s, a friend of mine actually commented that I should put Terri in a facility and divorce her. He said I should let someone else take care of her because she wouldn’t know the difference, anyway.” “Sorry, but your friend is an asshole.” “He’s my ex-friend and also a fucking bastard.” We exchanged faint smiles. “If someone had told me at nineteen that the love of my life would end up getting this disease, it wouldn’t have changed anything. None of us can

predict the future. Back then I didn’t know if I’d continue in the family business or even if I wanted kids. But I knew my life was going to be amazing because Terri would be in it. This god damn disease eventually will take her, but it will never get its hands on the lifetime of memories we shared. The first time Luken told me about you, I knew he was in trouble. I hope he doesn’t have to wait another minute to start making memories with his Terri.”

PULLING OUT OF the hospital parking lot, I headed home with Tom’s words echoing in my head. I was inspired by the love story he and Terri shared. It broke my heart knowing that one day she’d look at him and their children as if they were

complete strangers. The fact that he could still be so thankful for the years they’ve had together was a true testament to their love and commitment. Instead of this disease tearing the family apart, it just strengthened their efforts to cherish the time they had and the time they had left. In all the years Michael and I were together, I never once pushed to define our future. He was a wonderful man, but we didn’t have that mystical magical connection. The one you feel deep inside your soul, letting you know that no matter what happens in life everything will work out simply because you’re together. Luken was my soulmate, and I wanted to give him anything and everything he desired. Letting him go was so he could have time to build the life he wanted. Then it occurred to me, I’d never asked

him what he wanted. I was so damn sure I knew. Even the other night when he was trying to tell me, I dug my heels in, positive I was doing the right thing by him. Luken was a man who made his own decisions, and I had no right to take that away. Before I knew what was happening, my tires screeched into a U-turn and I headed toward the marina. It wasn’t until I got to the entrance that I realized I needed a card to unlock the gate. Fate, the universe, or just dumb luck was on my side because within seconds Charlie and his mom drove up and let me in. As I pulled into the parking space, I didn’t see Luken’s truck anywhere. It had been a long day, and I didn’t know when visiting hours at the hospital ended. It didn’t matter. I’d wait forever if needed. My stomach did somersaults as I made my way

down the dock and stood by his boat. Looking out over the water, I breathed in the salty air as the warm breeze blew through my hair. Just as the sun was beginning to dim, I heard his deep voice. “Cadence?” Closing my eyes, I let the sound wash over me before turning around. I had no idea what I was going to say or if Luken would even listen to me. He hadn’t made any attempt to say one word to me at the hospital. My only plan of action was to let my heart guide me. “Hi. I… um… I’m sorry for just dropping by.” “How’d you get through the gate?” “Charlie and his mom.” “Thank you for taking care of Mom. I should have said it at the hospital but…”

“I was glad I was there.” We stared at each other for several seconds in silence as nervous energy passed between us. “You look tired,” I said. “Did you come here to insult me?” I thought I detected a faint smile but wasn’t positive. “No! I’m nervous. I have something I need to tell you.” “Cadence, I… um…” “It won’t take long.” He nodded. “Okay.” “This past week without you has been the worst time of my life. Even worse than chemo. The first time we met you overwhelmed me. I tossed it off as excitement that a hot man was flirting with me. Then when you walked into the conference room, it was as if my entire universe had exploded.

As crazy as it might sound, I knew then I’d found my soulmate. I’m a grown, well-educated woman and I’m at a loss for words every time I try to describe how I feel about you. I was so blinded by the unknown that I pushed you away, thinking it was for your own good. I fucked up. And because of that, I’ve wasted precious time with you that I’ll never get back. For the past week I’ve been walking around like a zombie, because when you find the love of your life, every minute without them is a minute you’re not truly alive. I’m sorry I hurt you. But if you give me one more chance, I promise not to waste another moment with you.” Luken stood, expressionless for what felt like an eternity. “Cadence, I can’t…” Before he was able to finish his sentence, a

feminine voice shouted his name from the end of the dock. A flurry of red hair caught my attention first. “Hey, Luken!” She was tall, curvy, pretty and walking straight toward us. With my heart lodged in my throat, I made eye contact with him for a brief second before shifting my gaze toward the woman in the tight black dress. As she got closer, my fight-or-flight response kicked in. Tears were flooding my eyes, begging to fall. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have come,” I said, quickly rushing past Luken. “Cadence, wait!” My legs picked up speed so by the time I passed the woman, I was full out running until I reached my car. I was amazed that I made it home

in one piece. Between the sobs and the constant stream of tears, I could barely see the road. By the time I walked through my door I was exhausted and numb. I don’t know how long I walked aimlessly from room to room. Finally, I drifted over to the corner table filled with framed pictures and picked up the one of Luken and me. He’d taken it with his phone just before sunset on his boat during one of our weekend excursions and surprised me with the framed copy. I thought there weren’t any more tears left in me, but as I stared at the two us, more formed behind my eyes. Suddenly, there was banging at my door. I was going to ignore it, but it was persistent and getting louder. I placed the picture back in its spot and headed toward the door. When I opened it, I found Luken, his hand balled up in midair ready to go another

round with my door. “God damn, woman. You run fast,” he said, gasping for air. “What are you doing here?” “Can I come in?” I didn’t answer, I just moved aside so he could pass. After closing the door, I racked my hands over my face attempting to wipe away the tears. By the time I turned around, he was breathing steady and his gaze was fixed on me. “Cadence, I need to explain something…” “You don’t owe me any explanation. I had no right coming by like that. I didn’t mean to ruin your night with…” He took a step toward me. “Cadence…” “Your girl is lovely, Luken.” My voice cracked on each word.

“Cadence…” “You’re doing exactly what I told you to do, moving on.” “Cadence…” He took another step closer. “Although, it does seem pretty quick. I mean, it’s only been a week.” The sobs began trickling out. “Four days really if you start counting from the last time we saw each other.” By the end of my sentence, I was full on sobbing. Luken rushed over to me, grabbed the sides of my face, and devoured my mouth. I let the feel of his body and lips wash over me for a few seconds before breaking the kiss and pushing him away. “What are you doing?” He was breathing hard and fast again. “I’m trying to shut you up for five seconds. That girl you

saw wasn’t my date. She’s a ring designer.” “A what designer?” “Ring. After I left here Friday night, I spent most of the weekend licking my wounds. Yesterday I took my parents for a sail. Dad and I did some fishing and a lot of talking. By the time we were back at the marina, I’d made up my mind. I wasn’t going to give up on us. Cadence, I’ve known since that first weekend we spent together that I wanted to spend every weekend, weekday, month, and year with you for the rest of my life. Last night I called a buddy of mine whose wife designs jewelry.” “Luken…” He raised his hand, letting his fingertips run down the side of my face. Taking my chin between his index finger and thumb, he leaned in and whispered, “I can’t give

you a second chance, Cadence. Because I never gave up on our first one.” “I’m so sorry I put you through this.” “I’m just glad you came to your senses. I was giving it one more day before kidnapping your sweet little ass and hauling it out to the middle of the ocean where you couldn’t leave me. I love you, Cadence. Plain and simple. And as far as having a family or anything else that comes up… we’ll figure things out.” “But promise me that at any time, if you want to leave…” “I said, we’ll figure things out.” When our lips connected, every part of me came back to life. I was done living in the past and worrying about the future. All I wanted was to be in the moment with the man I loved.

“You’re really having a ring specially designed for me?” “I figure I got one shot, it better be impressive.” He winked. “By the way, I’m not proposing today, even though it would have been romantic as hell for me to be on one knee with a ring in hand when you opened that door.” “No matter when you decide to ask, the timing will be right.” Suddenly, he dipped down and tossed me over his shoulder. Laughing, I yelled, “Luken, what are you doing?!” “Can’t waste another minute. We gotta whole lotta lovin’ to catch up on.” Playfully he spanked my ass before carrying me to the bedroom, where we made up for lost

time over and over and over again.

Writing a book is solitary, but publishing one takes a village. First and foremost, I want to thank my family. Without their love and support, I’d be lost. Even though Google is an amazing tool to use

for all the research I do for my books, there’s nothing like connecting with a real person. Someone who can give you the personal, not always pretty, account of the thoughts and feelings they experienced through a difficult time. Trish Kruper was this person for In The Moment. I’ll never be able to thank her enough for allowing me to interview her and for her brutal honesty. Because of Trish, Cadence is a much richer and deeper character. Thank you to my wonderful beta reader, Tammy Zautner. The time she gives and her dedication to the project knows no bounds. I get a lot of compliments about the details I add to my stories. Part of the praise needs to go to Beth Hyams (aka Hawkeye proofreader). I can’t tell you how many times I text Beth, day and night,

with random questions. From, explain the rules of little league, to, what type of fabric is this dress made of (text photo), Beth has the answer. Her answers give the book subtle nuances that bring the story to life. Thank you to my dream team who work hard to make the final product look pretty and sparkly. Murphy Rae Hopkins, cover designer. Angela McLaurin, interior designer. Christine Estevez, editor. You ladies are an absolutely joy to work with. My undying gratitude to all of the bloggers and readers who have read, shared, and harassed their friends to read my books. Your kindness generosity have impacted my life more than will ever know. Each book you buy and note send, reminds me why I tackle the topics I do

and you you and

write these stories.

Alison G. Bailey is an award winning, Amazon and International bestselling author living in Charleston, South Carolina. At an early age she fell in love with writing, reworking scenes from her favorite TV shows and movies with new

dialogue. Alison wrote and produced several stage plays before turning her sights on the book world. Under the influence of a copious amount of Diet Pepsi and nonstop listening to her Spotify playlists, Alison writes unique emotional stories full of love, laughter, and romance.

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Present Perfect (Book #1, The Perfect Series) Past Imperfect (Book #2, The Perfect Series) Presently Perfect (Book #3, The Perfect Series) Stop! (Standalone) The Dance (Standalone)