Evernight Publishing ® www.evernightpublishing.com Copyright© 2016 Jenika Snow ISBN: 978-1-77233-817-1 Cover Artist: Jay Aheer Editor: Karyn White ALL...
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Evernight Publishing ® www.evernightpublishing.com
Copyright© 2016 Jenika Snow
ISBN: 978-1-77233-817-1 Cover Artist: Jay Aheer
Editor: Karyn White
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
WARNING: The unauthorized reproduction or distribution of this copyrighted work is illegal. No part of this book may be used or reproduced electronically or in print without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in reviews.
This is a work of fiction. All names, characters, and places are fictitious. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
ONLY HIS Jenika Snow Copyright © 2016
Chapter One
She’s mine and she’ll find that out soon enough. He kept saying that in his head over and over again, the mantra making this animal rise up in him, primitive, possessive, angry that he couldn’t control himself the way he wanted to. David didn’t want desires and needs to dictate how he acted, but when it came to Gillian he had no control, it seemed. His obsession for Gillian was so strong inside of him, so powerful, that David let it grow, and didn’t want it to stop or dim. He let it consume him until she was all he thought about anymore. He watched her, made sure she was safe, that no motherfuckers touched her. He could admit it was creepy as hell, made
him a stalker, but he didn’t care. She was his world, whether she knew it or not. David didn’t care that their past might be considered controversial, that she had been something different to him back in the day. He might not know when his desire for her had gotten so out of control, but he knew the exact moment his need to make sure she was safe began to control him. He could see that day so clearly in his head, knew it had been the defining moment in his life where he had said fuck everything else aside from Gillian. It was years ago, well after he’d gotten the divorce from Gillian’s mother, but to him it was still so fresh, so raw.
David sat in the car, the sun setting, the lights on the art gallery bright and casting a glow on the sidewalk in front of the building. He could see her inside, speaking with a young man, the same little asshole that worked there with her. David’s jealousy over Gillian was like a living beast inside of him, threatening to take his control until there was just this primal, animalistic need inside of him. Like clockwork she lifted her hand in a wave toward the prick, left the gallery, and went to her car. David scanned the surroundings, made sure no one was going to fuck with her, and only when she was in the car did he exhale. The gallery was decent, but it wasn’t in
the best neighborhood. She started the car, and before she pulled out of the driveway, his cell went off. Only glancing down long enough to grab it and look at the screen, his need beat through him stronger at the fact it was Gillian calling him. She trusted him, and that made his desire for her in all things beat like a war drum in his body. “Are you okay?” was the first thing he said even though he was staring right at her, unbeknownst to her. “Hi to you, too, David,” she said in her very feminine voice, a chuckle coming from her. “I just wanted to ask if you’d want to go with me to this gallery opening next weekend.”
He kept his focus on her car, watched as she pulled out of the lot, and did the same. He wanted to make sure she got home okay, and although following her, watching her, was so over the fucking line, he couldn’t stop himself. He did have a job, and although that meant he couldn’t watch her every second of the day, he did want to make sure she was protected. You’re crossing the fucking line, doing illegal shit, and if she ever found out she wouldn’t want anything to do with you. “You know I’m not into that art shit,” he said, but he would have been there anyway. “I know, but it’s a pretty big
turnout for a well-known artist, and I thought a little cultural experience might do you some good.” He could tell by her voice she was smiling. “I’m sure you have someone closer you’d like to take, maybe a friend from school?” He tightened his hold on the steering wheel, kept a good distance back from her car, and watched as she pulled down her street. Fortunately, she only lived a little more than ten minutes away, but still far enough she wasn’t still in the shitty part of town. “Sure, I could ask some of my girlfriends, but I know you don’t get out of the house much.” If she only knew.
He pulled his car to a stop down the street from the small house she rented, cut the lights, but kept the engine running. Gillian got out of the car and headed inside, all the while talking to him on the phone and not knowing what a son-of-a-bitch he was. “Whatever you want. Just tell me the time and place and I’ll be there.” Once he knew she was safe in the house he drove back home. After he spoke with her for a few more minutes, he finally ended the call, and drove the rest of the way in silence, his thoughts on her. David was a motherfucker, he knew that, knew that watching her, following her, and being an all around
piece of shit stalker would ruin the relationship they had. But he couldn’t stop himself. Gillian looked at him as a friend, and he knew it could never be anything more than that on her end. More than likely she saw him as the man who’d been married to her mother back in the day, and because of that, because of the relationship they’d had, the “parental” responsibilities he’d had toward her, she could never see him as what he really wanted. But despite that he couldn’t stop what he was doing, couldn’t make his desire and emotions for her any less real or intense. Once he was back at his place he shut the front door and looked around the
barren existence of his life. He was fucking exhausted, had been up for the last twenty-four hours because of work and making sure Gillian was okay, but he knew it would be a bitch to fall asleep. On a good day he got four hours of sleep, and the rest of the time … well, insomnia was his companion. Walking over to the kitchen cupboard and getting out the bottle of vodka he kept on hand, he didn’t even bother with a glass. Instead he went to his room, shut the door, and got undressed. Lying on his bed against the headboard, with only his briefs on, staring at the ceiling, and drinking straight from the bottle of liquor, he focused on a small crack in the corner of
the room. David had thought about just coming clean with Gillian many times, to explain his desire for her, the lengths he’d go to make her safe … to make her his in all ways. But he’d always stopped himself, wanting her in his life, even if that meant he had to be in the shadows. Would she understand why he did what he did? Would she understand that after her attack something in him had changed, shifted? It had been that moment that changed everything for him. Although before that, when he saw the beautiful, intelligent woman she’d grown into, he’d started to fall for her, it hadn’t been until he saw her being hurt, forced, that a switch had gone off in him.
He tipped the bottle back, taking a long pull from it, and scrubbing a hand over his hair. He was too old for this shit, to be following a woman around like a fucking asshole. Where it concerns Gillian there are no lengths we won’t go. That voice played through in his head, far stronger than even his common sense and rationalization. He was fucked, but the dark part of him wanted to be covered in those shadows.
Chapter Two “Come on, Gillian.” Brian grabbed her wrist forcefully and yanked her forward. She’d only had two beers, but she felt like she was drowning, like the world was turning and she couldn’t grasp onto anything. “Leave me alone,” she said, but her voice sounded slurred even to her. Blinking back the dizziness, trying to get her vision to clear, became pointless. In fact, it made it worse. Placing her hand on the wall to steady herself, she tried pulling her hand free from Brian’s hold. He was so much stronger than she was, or maybe she was just too fucked up?
Either way, struggling was only making her feel even worse. “You know how long I’ve wanted you?” Brian said, his mouth right by her ear now, his hot, humid breath brushing along her cheek. She shook her head, squeezed her eyes shut, and tried to push him away. “I don’t want this, Brian,” she tried to say clearly. “This isn’t right.” “Oh, it’s right, baby.” He pulled her even harder against him, and his arousal for her was clear, disgusting, and her fear rose. “No, Brian.” She placed her hands on his chest and pushed him away. But Brian obviously didn’t care if this was consensual or not.
“This was the length I’d go to have you.” She didn’t know what he meant by that, but before she could question him she was spun around and tossed onto the bed. She went to stand up, but he pushed her back down. “I hate that I had to get you like this, but you kept turning me down, Gillian.” Brian sounded urgent, desperate, and Gillian’s fear rose even higher. She knew where this was going, and as much as she wanted to fight him, to stop it, her arms and length felt so damn heavy, her mind foggy, confused. He drugged me. That realization had her blood running cold.
Her cell phone dug into her from her back pocket, and trying to focus, she saw Brian was busy getting undressed, his side to her. She reached for her phone, and after the second attempt she was able to pull it out of her pocket. Getting to the keypad and dialing someone’s number was harder than she thought, but it was David’s name that came up first, and she knew if anyone could help her it was him. Pushing the send button on his number, she glanced up at Brian and saw he was about to face her. She tucked the phone to her side, didn’t know if David would be up at this hour, but she hoped, prayed. “I don’t want this, Brian.
Please.” Could he even understand her? In her mind the words sounded clear, but coming out of her mouth was a different story. They felt thick, hard to even pronounce, and when Brian grinned she knew he either couldn’t understand her, or he didn’t give a fuck. Probably both. Was David on the line? And then saying to hell with it, because she needed to get out of this, she turned and grabbed her phone, which was partially under her. “David,” she tried to say his name. Squeezing her eyes shut, she tried again. “I need help. He’s going to rape—” Brian snatched the phone from
her and tossed it against the wall. She saw pieces scatter around, and her entire body tensed. “Fuck, Gillian,” Brian said, sounded even more desperate. And then he was on the bed, onto of her, pinning her body down with his, and kissing the side of her neck. She couldn’t stop this, and that was the scariest thing of all. Gillian opened her eyes, stared at her bedroom ceiling, and breathed through the temporary panic that assaulted her. She had the nightmare every once in a while, and although she’d gotten therapy, and was, for the most part, healed, there were still times that night came back to haunt her.
She sat up, trying to calm her racing heart, and got up to go to the bathroom. Turning on the light and placing her hands on the sink, Gillian stared at her reflection. Her black hair was a matted mess around her face, sweat causing a lot of it to stick to her cheeks and forehead, and the dark circles under her eyes looking like she’d gotten the shit kicked out of her. “You’re stronger than this,” she whispered to her reflection. Turning the faucet on and washing her face, she knew coping techniques to keep the panic and past from claiming her. She had moved on with her life since then, and although it had been seven years ago, when she’d been twenty, she knew
that a trauma like that never fully left a person. Going back to the bed, she sat on the edge and stared at her cell phone. When the nightmare came back, the first person she thought about was David. He’d been the one person to stop Brian, to make sure she’d been safe. He’d also been the one to kick the shit out of Brian, to send him to the hospital with a broken nose and jaw, and fractured arm, and dislocated knee. Brian had looked like someone had taken a meat pounder to his face, but she hadn’t cared. The boy she’d gone to high school with, had thought was her friend, had drugged and nearly raped her. For all she cared he could have fallen off a cliff and she would
have stood there watching his descent. She knew David would have accepted her call anytime of the day. He’d been there for her all the way back when he’d been briefly married to her mother. But that had been so long ago. Even then he’d been a friend, and not a father figure. She had a dad already, didn’t need another one, and she’d been happy and content to have someone she could talk to. But sadly the marriage hadn’t lasted that long. Even though that had been so long ago, she still kept in contact with him and considered him the closest person in her life. With her mother traveling Europe and Asia with her new boyfriend, hardly keeping in contact as it was, Gillian didn’t have a
lot of people she trusted. Aside from David, she didn’t have anyone she felt comfortable speaking with about her problems, about the things that had happened. David’s always been there for me, never lost contact, and I love him. Yes, she loved him as a friend, but what she’d never told anyone, what she would never tell a soul, or show outwardly, was that she was in love with David, had been since that moment he pulled Brian off of her, and she watched David beat the shit out of him. A part of her thought it was wrong for her to feel anything sexual toward a man that had been in her life technically as her stepfather. Although
she never saw him in that capacity, and she knew he had never seen her as a daughter, it still seemed wrong, taboo even. Not calling him, even though she knew he’d be there for her, she lay back on the bed. Gillian breathed out and scrubbed her hands over her face, knowing she wouldn’t be getting back to sleep after the nightmare. She never did. Of course her thoughts went to Brian, as they did every time she was woken up by the past. She didn’t know where he was right now, and didn’t care. It might have been seven years, but she remembered that night like it was yesterday. A little voice inside of her said Brian remembered that night, too,
given the fact he was no doubt scarred from the beat down by David. Turning on her side she thought about David that night, about how fierce and strong he’d been, at the fact he’d done what he’d done to protect her. They’d gotten closer after that, not sexually, but just … closer. They were as connected as two people who had gone through a traumatic event could be. He was the one person she could talk to about whatever. He never judged, never looked down on her. Gillian wanted to spend time with him, but was too afraid to broach that subject, explain that the kind of time she wanted to explore with him was not on a “friends only” basis. “It is what it is,” she whispered
in the darkness. If she never had David in that way, she was content to at least have him in her life as a friend. A world without him in it seemed pretty damn bleak.
Chapter Three “I don’t like this,” he said while looking Gillian in the eyes. “David, I’ll be fine. It’s just a couple of friends hanging out at O’Donnell’s.” She smiled, but it didn’t ease him in the slightest. “I can send you a text if you want, once I get home?” He nodded, not admitting that he’d be watching her, making sure no fuckers messed with her. It had been seven years since that motherfucker laid his hands on her, and ever since then David had been overprotective, he could admit that. But knowing she was putting herself in this situation, going to a bar on a Friday night that was known to get
rowdy, didn’t ease up the darkness in him. “O’Donnell’s isn’t safe, Gillian.” He leaned back in the chair. It was the afternoon, the sun shining through her kitchen window, and he was on his way to work. Owning his own contracting business allowed him to come and go as he pleased, and when he wasn’t working in the office or from home, he was making sure Gillian wasn’t fucked with. “David,” she said, leaving a stretch of silence between them before continuing. “Is there any place that’s really safe?” She lifted a brow, clearly challenging him. “No, not when it concerns you.”
He wasn’t joking, not when it concerned Gillian’s wellbeing. “I thought you would have come to realize that by now?” She sighed and leaned back in the chair. “I should, I know, but…” She was silent after that for several moments, but he didn’t push her into continuing, didn’t try to force anything from her. “I know you are worried about me because of what happened, David.” He didn’t respond, just stared into her hazel eyes. Yeah, he was worried about her. He did that every damn second of every fucking day. But he didn’t want her knowing the actual lengths he’d go to ensure she was safe. And he didn’t want to talk about what
that fucker had tried to do to her … what he had done to her. That would just piss him off to the point he’d need to get his aggression out at the gym, or better yet find someone that wanted to start shit with him. “I know you worry about me more than you should, but I want you to know,” she reached out and placed her hand on his. “I value our friendship more than you’ll ever know. You’re my best friend, the only person I can really talk to. But I’m also a big girl, not foolish, well, not anymore,” she said and smiled. “Anyway, I just want you to know that I’m okay.” His entire body tightened, his cock hardening, but he kept his cool. No
way was he going to lose it or show her what he felt. That would scare her off, and that was the last thing he wanted. “I know you are, but that won’t make me stop worrying about you, Gillian. Let’s leave it at that.” His voice was thick, tight, and he didn’t mean to come off like he was upset. He wasn’t angry with her, but he was upset with himself and the things inside of him, the feelings and emotions he’d never really be able to express. So instead you’ll stalk her, and watch her because that’s the only way you can truly make sure she’s okay. “I promise to be careful, and I’ll text you when I get home.” He just nodded, because he knew
what he had to do, and that wasn’t waiting at home for her text. Yeah, he was so far over the fucking edge for her that he’d never see solid ground again. **** She’d been having this weird feeling all day, that feeling like someone was being watched, and that someone was her. The hairs on the back of her neck stood on end, and no matter how much she glanced around, trying to see if maybe someone in the gallery was looking at her, she came up with nothing. No, not nothing. Just then, her focus landed on a man in the back, his hat pulled down low, his blond hair poking out from all sides. He wore a long duster jacket,
jeans, and a pair of dark boots that looked like they’d seen better days. He watched her, and when he saw she was looking at him as well, he lifted up his wine glass in a salute. She smiled, but the tingling on her nape intensified. “That’s Gerald Poolish.” She glanced to her side at one of the wait staff. “The artist?” The waitress nodded. “I heard this was one of the shows he came out for.” The waitress left, and although the artist was no longer looking at her, Gillian still felt that tingling on the back of her neck. Gerald Poolish was known for being reclusive, reserved, and rarely even showing up to his own art shows. To see him here was a bit of a shock,
and she was a little awestruck. Gillian loved art, always had, but she couldn’t paint a straight line if her life depended on it. Instead, she’d decided to be a part of the art world, even if she wasn’t an artist. This showing was small, intimate, unlike the one she was taking David to. So maybe that’s why Gerald was here? As much as she would have loved to go talk to him, to see how he was, how he acted, and get a feel for the man behind the paintings, she was reserved herself in these situations. Instead of potentially making an ass out of herself in front of a brilliant artist, she turned and walked the room, seeing if anyone needed help on painting
explanations, and just trying to keep herself busy. But the whole while she felt that tightening of her skin, felt like someone had their fingers on her, making her very aware that she wasn’t alone. It was a strange feeling, one she got on occasion, but never this strongly. Maybe she was losing her mind? “You have a magnetism that is like a Callahan painting.” The voice behind her startled her for how close it was to her, and Gillian turned, feeling her heart in her throat. There, standing far too close for comfort given the fact she didn’t know him, was Gerald Poolish. “Excuse me?” was the first thing that came out of her mouth before she
could stop herself. “I was just complimenting you on the fact you’re a very gorgeous woman,” he said and held his hand out. “Gerald Poolish.” She took his hand and nodded. “I know who you are.” He smiled, and it was nice, genuine. He looked like he’d just rolled out of bed. He also had a generous amount of paint stains on his jacket, even some staining his fingers. “I hope you’ve heard all good things.” He grinned. She hadn’t really heard good or bad, just that he was reserved. Apparently not right now as he was the one striking up the conversation.
“I couldn’t help but notice you through the crowd. You were enthralled with the Yenna Black.” They both turned and looked at the painting in question. It was a large canvas painted black, with swatches of oranges, yellows, and blues covering it, the design random, abstract. “Yes, it’s very beautiful, eyecatching.” He nodded. “I want this for my home.” He turned and looked at her then. “It’ll remind me of the beautiful woman I saw at the show who has good taste in art.” Gillian felt her cheeks heat. “I’ve embarrassed you,” Gerald said and chuckled. “Not my intent, but I’m pleased to have gotten a reaction out
of you.” “I…” What was she supposed to say? She was pleased to meet this artist, but the vibes he gave off told her he was flirting, that he was interested, whereas she wasn’t in that way. The back of her neck tingled especially hard right then, and she lifted her hand to rub it. Looking out toward the front windows, she couldn’t see anything because of the lighting inside. But whatever was out there had her entire body taking notice, it seemed. A waiter walked by, and Gerald grabbed two champagne flutes off the tray. He handed one to Gillian, and she took it, smiling. “Thank you.” She turned back to
the painting, sipping on her champagne, and feeling Gerald’s stare on her. “To be honest I noticed you as soon as I came in.” Although she had been interested in meeting Gerald Poolish, this was getting a little weird for her. She choked on her champagne for a second, and turned with wide eyes to look at him. “You did?” she asked, her voice highpitched. “Of course.” He smiled again and reached out to touch her shoulder. She glanced down at where his hand was, not impressed. “I see a beautiful woman surrounded by beautiful paintings, what’s not to notice?” Okay, Gillian was going to have
to figure out how to gently and professionally steer this encounter in the other direction, because the way it was going was not what she wanted.
Chapter Four The steering wheel creaked under David’s hold, and he felt his entire body tighten. He was getting pissed, and all because of the interest shown in Gillian by some scuzzy looking motherfucker. The asshole had his hand on her shoulder, and it took everything in him not to go there and rip the asshole’s fucking limb off, push the guy away, and beat the shit out of him. He never said he was sane when it came to Gillian. But Gillian took a step back, which had the fucker’s hand dropping away from her. Good girl, baby.
“She’s not yours, you fucker,” he said, staring at the guy, and even from the distance David could see how he wanted Gillian. “Hell no.” But David stayed in the car, saw how Gillian was keeping a good distance from the asshole and he was pleased with that. He’d been sitting here for the last hour and a half, just watching her mingle, wanting to be beside her, to have his hands around her, letting everyone know she was his. If that ever happened he didn’t know. There wasn’t much that unnerved or scared David, but the thought of not having Gillian in his life, whether that be she was taken from him or she broke off their friendship, was at the top of his list of things that would
really fuck him up. **** Gillian said goodnight to the last guest, locked up, and sighed. The show had been a success, with all of the paintings being sold. She’d agreed to make sure everyone was out and everything logged out before she left, and although it wouldn’t take that long, she was regretting making the commitment as her feet screamed at her for being a bitch and wearing these heels. “Get it done and get the hell home.” That mantra played through her head as she wrapped everything up, logged out the sold paintings, and finally left the gallery. With her back to the
parking lot, she locked the door, juggling her purse and keys in one hand, and a stack of paperwork and invoices in the other. She didn’t hear anything, but she certainly felt that “someone is watching me” vibe. Turning around and holding the keys in between her fingers, so she could use them as a weapon if need be, she was greeted with nothing, absolutely nothing. A parking lot light flickered in the distance, the yellow glow fading, wearing out. You’re freaking yourself out because it’s dark and creepy as hell out here. She kept the keys in her hand, her fingers hurting as they dug into the metal. Quickly making her way toward the
parking lot, she scanned her surroundings, always hating having to work late because this part of town wasn’t the best, and it creeped her the hell out. Once in her car she started the engine, but before she could pull out the flash of headlights in front of her momentarily blinded her. The car came closer at a snail’s pace until it was right beside her, the driver’s side right beside hers. Gillian’s heart pounded hard, and she’d locked the doors upon entering the car, but she was still freaked out. That was, until she saw it was Gerald Poolish in the driver’s seat. Gerald was wealthy, she knew that, but the car he drove had to be
several years old, not a luxury brand, and he dressed as if he was sleeping on someone’s couch and didn’t give a shit if he ever changed his clothes. She hated to use the stereotype of what everyone thought an artist looked like, but Gerald did fit it to a T on a lot of points. He rolled down his window, and she did the same, although she just wanted to get home. “Hey,” he said. “Hi.” Where the hell had he been camped out? I thought he left half an hour before we closed? “You headed home?” She nodded. “Yeah, I’m beat.” Her feet decided to throb, as if reminding her that a soak in a hot bath
had been the plan. “So, getting a drink with me isn’t something you’d be up for?” He looked so hopeful, but the fact he had either stayed out here the whole time, or had left and come back just to ask her out, didn’t sit well with her. “Um.” She didn’t know how to say this without sounded rude, but she wasn’t about to lead him on, not even if he was Gerald Poolish. “I’d love to, but I really am tired, and have so much paperwork to finish before tomorrow.” He didn’t speak for several moments, and it got a bit awkward. “Okay, well, it was great to finally meet an extraordinary artist like yourself. I should be going, though.” She smiled,
not wanting to offend him. “Come on, one drink?” He was persistent, but in a friendly way, she supposed. She tightened her hands on the steering wheel. “I really should be going. Maybe another time though?” The silence stretched again. “I don’t usually have to beg a woman to have a drink with me.” He started chuckling, and although he sounded light, joking even, she knew he was tense. He reached in the glove box, grabbed something, and faced her again. “Maybe next time,” was all he said as he handed her a small card. She took it, saw it was his business card, and although she should
have declined even that, because taking it might seem like she was interested, she smiled and placed it in the cup holder beside her. Gerald gave her a once over before finally rolling his window up. She let out a sigh, watched his taillights fade in the distance, and finally headed home. Once she reached her place, she cut the engine and sat there a second. To say she felt weird about the whole Gerald situation was an understatement, but she pushed it all away, blaming it on the fact she hadn’t had a meaningful relationship in a long time because she had such strong feelings for David. Maybe her love for David blinded her to what she could
have with someone else? Maybe she should just say forget how she felt about David, try to bury those feelings, and move on? It wasn’t like she’d never been with a man, but she was older now, knew what she wanted in her life. It just seemed unappealing to date anyone when she was in love with another man. She got out of the car and headed inside, not liking that her thoughts were in such turmoil. Tossing her bag on the table and sitting on her couch, she leaned all the way back and just tried to relax. “Maybe I should have had a drink with Gerald? What would it have hurt?” she asked herself as she stared at the wall. Or maybe I should tell David
how I feel? She pushed that thought away as soon as it came to mind. No, she could never tell David she was in love with him. Not only would it probably ruin their friendship, even if it didn’t, that confession would sure as hell make things awkward and different between them. But maybe he feels the same for me? Again, she pushed that thought out of her head. He’d never shown her any interest, and because of their past, what he’d been to her, maybe that’s all he saw her as—like a stepdaughter. That had disgust filling her. She sure as hell hoped he didn’t see her like that. Theirs
had always been a friendly relationship, not one of authority or parental guidance. That’s how she liked it, how she’d wanted it. Maybe if she brought up seeing a man it might give her some kind of clue if David had feelings for her? Thinking that he might made her feel like a fool, but she had to do something. Jumping into the dating field without at least seeing if David might want something with her was not an option. And if he showed no reaction, well, then she’d at least know he felt nothing. Coming out and asking him of he cared for her in more than one way wasn’t something she was comfortable doing. But it scared the hell out of her to
even think about speaking to David about this. His friendship, his presence in her life, was more important to her than anything else she’d ever experienced. It wasn’t just because of the issue with Brian, or how they knew each other. David had always been there for her, and she knew he always would be, even if she did reveal how she felt. But telling him that she was in love with him could definitely make things awkward. No. That was something she didn’t want to risk, didn’t even want to think about.
Chapter Five David made no apologies for what he was doing right now … following the fucker that had been hitting on Gillian at the art show, and then again being a prick and waiting until she got off work. David had been waiting the whole time in the parking lot across the street, and although what he did might not be something a normal and sane person would do, well, he didn’t give a fuck. The difference between him and some other asshole was that David was sincerely looking out for Gillian, had only her best interest at heart, and was in love with her. The prick that obviously wanted a piece didn’t know her from
Adam, and he wasn’t about to let a repeat happen like it did all those years ago. So, he’d followed the little prick after he’d left the parking lot of the gallery. Honestly, David didn’t give a shit if the bastard caught him. In fact, he hoped there was a confrontation. It would give him a chance to let out this aggression. But no matter how obsessed David was with Gillian, no matter how in love with her he was, he wasn’t going to beat some fucker’s ass just for hitting on her. Touching her, forcing her—those were different stories, ones that had bodily harm in them. He followed the guy out of town and into the city, and he was slightly
surprised at the apartment building the guy either lived in, or was visiting. Given the vehicle he drove and how he’d been dressed, he hadn’t assumed he’d be anywhere near a place like this. But David watched as he entered in a code on the keypad, watched the gate for the underground garage lift to allow him entrance, and David felt his beast lessen slightly at the fact the guy was calling it a night. Maybe he should go check on Gillian? Just then, as if thinking about her caused her to call, his cell vibrated. “You’re okay?” he asked, still staring at the garage and watching the gate close back in place. She started chuckling, and he felt
himself relax at the sound. “I’m fine. You worry too much.” It’s never too much when it concerns you. “I was wondering if you wanted to come over for some coffee.” Everything in him hardened at the thought of seeing her. She aroused him just by being in his presence, but when she was at home relaxing, he fucking got harder because of it. Even now he could imagine her in a pair of loose lounge pants, and her shirt hanging from her, but showing him that she was all woman. Her hair would be messy, and she’d have it in a haphazard ponytail. God, he fucking loved everything about her. “It’s late, though.” He wanted to
tell her he’d be over there, but he also wanted to show her respect. “It’s not even eleven,” she said, her voice soft, so very feminine. “I’d like to have some company. Tonight was brutal, in a sense.” He knew the gallery shows she did were hard on her, and he wanted to be there for her, no matter, what. “I’ll be there as soon as I can.” David had to get out of the city first, maybe even go home and clean up. “I’ll see you then.” They disconnected, and he took a second to stare at the apartment building. The jealousy and anger he felt were like a living entity in him. David was a sane man, for the most part, and when it
didn’t concern Gillian, but there were things, people and actions that just sent him over the edge. After a few minutes he pulled away from the apartment and headed to Gillian’s house. He parked the vehicle at the corner of the driveway, climbed out, and before he could knock on the front door she had it open. He had to steel himself at the image of her; hair tousled, oversized shirt hanging off of one of her shoulders, and cotton shorts that were barely visible under the hem of the shirt. Holy mother of God. He scrubbed a hand over his mouth, not gawking, because he wasn’t a sick bastard. “Come on in,” she said in a soft
voice. She had her reading glasses on, the black frames oversized, making her face seem even smaller. She was fucking gorgeous when she wasn’t done up, and although she didn’t primp herself like a lot of women, when she was in this element, her natural beauty could have brought him to his knees. David passed her, the scent of strawberries coming from her and making him use all his strength not to get hard right then and there. He moved past her, his body tense with the strength it took to keep himself under lock. “You want some coffee?” she asked, and he nodded without turning around. What he needed was something
a hell of a lot stronger. She was gone only for a few moments before she returned. He turned from the wall, looking at the few pictures she had on the wall, and took the cup. She looked at him with this strange expression on her face, and when their fingers brushed his gut tightened. It was like everything froze for just a second as he took in the sight of her pink of her lips. He was transfixed by the light sprinkling of freckles along the bridge of her nose, of the green in her hazel eyes, the way the brown was like bursts of color around her pupils. For just a second he could envision letting the cup drop to the ground, pulling her close, and claiming her mouth. She’d be
his, wouldn’t struggle, and wouldn’t say this was wrong. But those precious few seconds that all of this passed through his mind had him even more reserved. She turned and walked over to the couch, sat down, and for a moment but didn’t say anything, just looked into her coffee cup. “Is everything okay, Gillian?” he asked, his voice deep, scratchy with the strength he was using to keep himself under control, to appear “normal”. He moved to the chair across from the couch, took a drink from the cup, and tasted the bourbon she’d slipped in there. The kick was strong, and did the trick. She lifted her head, the emotion
clear on her face. David didn’t push her though. He wanted her to be comfortable in telling him whatever was on her mind. “Can I ask you something?” she asked, and he nodded. “You can ask me anything.” He took another drink of the coffee, because he knew he’d need it for whatever was about to come. “Why haven’t you been with anyone since you left my mother?” Fuck. He hadn’t thought she’d ask that, and it took him a second to mull it over. The truth was before the situation with Brian fucking with Gillian, he’d been with women sexually. He’d cared for Gillian, of course, but until his
obsession got too out of control he’d tried to focus on other things, knowing she wasn’t someone he could be with. But then when things had gone down with Brian, that fucking dark switch clicked in him and Gillian had been the only thing he could focus on. She’d been it for him, and he hadn’t even thought about any other women for the last seven years. But he sure as fuck wasn’t going to admit that. “I just haven’t found anyone.” He could hear how deep his voice was, tried to keep his expression stoic, but he wondered where this was going. If she tells me she is seeing someone I might fucking lose it.
Chapter Six Why is this so damn hard? As she stared at David, trying to muster up the courage to just tell him how she felt, the words lodged in her throat. I love you. I’m in love with you. I’m too afraid of losing you to tell you the truth. But his expression was stoic, no emotion showing on his face. He was like a fallen angel, his dark hair short, swept away from his forehead, his eyes light amber in color, and hauntingly beautiful. He could have been the very devil himself and she wouldn’t have cared. She would have loved him just as
much, just the same. Wake up. The world doesn’t always work the way you want it to. He used to be your stepfather, and now he’s just a friend. He feels an obligation to look after you after what you went through, after the past we share. Those words played through her head and broke her heart all in the same breath. Just push the feelings down. Move on from what you really want in order to keep David in your life. His answer to her question hadn’t been very in depth, but then again David didn’t overly share. He never had. David leaned forward, placed his forearms on his thighs, and stared at her
right in the eyes. She’d seen this “look” from him before. He was worried about her, and she couldn’t exactly blame him since she was being vague. “Did someone hurt you?” She shook her head right away. “No, no.” “Someone bothering you? You know you can tell me, Gillian.” She smoothed her palms over her thighs. “I know, but everything is fine.” He looked like he didn’t believe her, so she quickly just brought up what she wanted to ask him. “I don’t have any real friends to talk to about anything, you know that.” He nodded. “I’m always here for you.”
She smiled, but she was so damn nervous. “I want to start dating, but I feel like it’s not ‘right’, if that makes any sense.” He didn’t speak, didn’t even move for a long time. David finally leaned back in the chair, his legs parted slightly, his hands in tight fists on his thighs. She looked down at his hands, saw how tightly his hands were clenched, his knuckles white. Looking up at his face, she saw his jaw was clenched, his eyes appearing hard. His demeanor took her off guard, because he looked … upset. “Do you have someone in mind you’d want to start seeing?” She shook her head. “No, not
really. I mean I had an offer, but it just doesn’t feel right, but not in a bad way, if that makes sense.” It doesn’t make sense, because he has no clue what in the hell you’re going on about. “If it doesn’t feel right then it’s not right, Gillian.” His jaw was still clenched tight, his focus right on her. She glanced down at her feet, not knowing how to even go on with this conversation. It felt weird, and despite the fact she was close to David, speaking about dating, and other guys, was strange given the fact she was in love with him. “Don’t you think it’s weird that I’m in my twenties and not in a
relationship? That I haven’t been in one?” “No,” he said instantly. She was twisting her hands together, her heart beating so fast. “Maybe I’m defective in that sense—” “There’s nothing wrong with you, Gillian, you understand?” She nodded. But there is something wrong with me. I’m in love with you, David, but too much of a coward. “Are you having issues with what happened?” David’s voice grew hard. She shook her head. “No, not really. That’s not why I haven’t been with anyone.”
He didn’t move, didn’t respond. “I think I just need to jump into something, just push how I feel away. I’m getting too old to just be alone, and I don’t want that. I don’t want to be alone for the rest of my life.” David didn’t speak, and if possible she saw his body grow even tauter. “I should probably let you get to bed. It’s late.” David stood before she could say anything. Gillian stood and followed him to the front door. He stood there for a second, his body so big, so tall. He was nearing six and a half feet tall, and compared to her five-foot-six frame, which wasn’t that short, he towered over her. The shirt he wore
didn’t hide how muscular he was. And his arms, God, his arms were so big, so hard and strong. Everything in her warmed, heated at the sight. “Are you sure you want to leave?” Did I just say that? He’s uncomfortable with the conversation, clearly. “Yeah, I have some things to take care of.” He didn’t look at her, and then he opened the door and left. She stood there for a second, not sure what had happened, but knowing that her instincts had been right. David didn’t reciprocate her feelings. At least she found out without making herself look like a fool and baring herself.
**** Controlling himself until he was sure Gillian couldn’t see him was hard as fuck. David didn’t know exactly what she’d wanted to talk about, but relationships sure as shit hadn’t been it. He’d been driving for the last twenty minutes, and decided going into the city was what he needed to do. She wanted to date, and he couldn’t blame her. Maybe I should have fucking told her what I wanted, that her seeing anyone else would make me homicidal. And he would be in a blind, murderous rage if he saw her with another man, if he saw some motherfucker touching her, kissing her.
He tightened his hands on the steering wheel so hard the leather cracked slightly. When he finally got into the city he went as deep as he could, going to the scuzzy, dangerous part. He needed the violence to get this rage out of him. David pulled the car into a darkened alley, cut the engine, and sat there for a second. He didn’t care where he found some violence, just as long as he could get this dark energy out of him, at least for the time being. Thinking about Gillian with another man infuriated him, and despite the fact he tried to play it cool in front of her, he knew she could see the changes in him. But what she didn’t know was why those
changes occurred, why he acted the way he had. Reaching over to this glove box, he pulled out the set of brass knuckles. They were scuffed, old, worn. They had been used really fucking well, and tonight would be no different. Tonight they would be covered in blood. Grabbing his baseball cap and his jacket from the back of the vehicle, he got out, put the cap on, and slipped the black jacket on, zipping it up. He pulled the brim of the hat down low on his head. David had the brass knuckles on his hand and curled his fingers toward his palm, feeling the cold, hard metal heat from his skin. This part of the city was shit,
where the scum of the state came, mingled, and became this cesspool of life. This part of the city was where he’d get the violence he needed, and it wouldn’t take much at all. He left the alley, knowing full well his vehicle might be in bad shape when he got back to it, but for what he needed to do tonight he didn’t give a shit. There was a decent amount of activity on the streets because it was the weekend, and each guy he passed looked like they’d been scraped off the bottom of the barrel. David’s blood was pumping, adrenaline was rushing through his veins, and he was getting antsy for some action. He kept his hand with the brass knuckles in his pocket, and
focused on his surroundings. “Wanna buy some sugar?” a guy said from an alley David was about to pass. He stopped, looked at the motherfucker, and eyed him up and down. He was on the smaller side, and just him wouldn’t make much of a fight, but David doubted he was alone. There was commotion across the street at the hole-in-the-wall strip club, a fight having broken out. But David kept his focus on the guy selling drugs. “Come on, man. You want some sugar or what?” The drug dealer became agitated, his eyes darting back and forth. David squeezed his hand into a fist tighter, the metal digging into his
flesh. The other man took a step back, deeper into the alley so he was now partially covered in shadows. “If you want something I got it.” He moved another step into the shadows, and David followed. He was on alert, prepared, though. He didn’t do drugs, but looking at this piece of shit’s eyes, a man that most likely dealt to anyone, regardless of age, told David he wouldn’t mind throwing down. The sound of another guy coming closer had David glancing over his shoulder. The man most likely had been hiding behind the dumpster. These guys weren’t just drug dealers. They jumped people and took what they had when the
deals were going down. “Whatchu want?” David looked at the first guy again. “I don’t think this prick wants anything but trouble,” the second guy said. At least they were smart enough to realize that. David rolled his head around his neck, felt his blood rush faster as his heart pumped harder. He was ready, needed this violence, needed to feel his fist slamming into a fucker’s face. “Or maybe this asshole’s a cop?” the first guy that had been offering drugs said. David said and took a step
closer. They guy turned his head and spit. “Nah, I think he’s just a crazy motherfucker who wants his ass beat.” The shadows covered the first guy’s face partially, but David didn’t need to see much to deliver the violence. “Don’t fuck with me.” The second guy came around, keeping close to David and standing on his other side. They were trying to intimidate him, but what these bastards didn’t know was David got off on this. The first guy reached in his pocket to pull out a knife. He opened it, pointing it toward David. Then the second guy rushed him and slammed his body into David’s, which pushed him
against the brick wall, and then proceeded to try to stab him with the knife he’d had pressed to his outer thigh. “You fucked with the wrong assholes,” the second guy said. “Mess him up,” his buddy muttered. David looked right into the eyes of the guy pinning him up against the wall. He was allowing this, but now it was time to get this party really started. He grinned, feeling that darkness creep up and totally take control. He took his hand from his pocket, reached up with his other hand, and grabbed the fucker’s neck. He lifted him easily off the ground, reared his hand back that had the brass knuckles, and looked right into the
prick’s eyes. He slammed his fist into the guy’s face over and over again, the brass tearing flesh, ripping open the prick’s face. The scent of blood filled David’s nose, but it just made him need this more. He continued to slam his fist into the fucker’s cheek and temple until he resembled a piece of beaten, raw meat. “You motherfucker.” David tossed the guy aside and turned to look at the first man. He didn’t speak, didn’t even blink as he watched the dealer start swinging the knife around sloppily. This would be over far too soon. He dodged the knife, slammed his fist into the guy’s kidneys when he spun, and after that took a step back. The
man turned around, his face a mask of rage as he looked down at his friend, who was lying on the ground unconscious. David could have gone further, could have kept going until there was no pulse, but he’d gotten what he needed from the bastard. They stood there facing each other for several seconds, and then the guy charged forward again. They crashed back into the opposite wall, but before David let him gain any kind of supremacy he spun them around so the man was the one pressed to the wall. The asshole clawed at David’s hands, and even if David weren’t bigger than he was, this fucker still wouldn’t have stood a chance. David was too
amped up and needed this fight too damn badly to let anyone, despite size, overpower him. He squeezed the dealer’s throat tighter as his mind drifted to Gillian, to the image of her with another man. His resolve snapped, and all civility left him. He slammed his fist into the dealer’s temple, David’s gaze fuzzy as his rage took over. He hit the fucker over and over again. “Please, stop. No more,” the man wheezed out, but it fell on deaf ears. David stared right into the bloodied, pulverized face of the dealer, and brought the brass to the side of his head for one final blow, finally allowing the man to drop to the ground. Blood
covered David’s hands and chest, even on his cheek and neck. The groans that came up filled David’s ears, but he wasn’t focused on the need to unleash it anymore. He moved out of the alley, not giving a shit he was covered in blood. The few people he passed moved to the side, but they didn’t seem overly surprised at the sight of him. No doubt they’d seen a lot worse in this part of the city. Once he got back to his car he stood by the driver’s side door and looked down at his hands. They were covered in blood, thick chunks of flesh along the brass. He removed the metal, and took off his jacket, tossing them onto the backseat. Once back in the car he sat there
again for several seconds, still feeling his heart beating fast, but the adrenaline and need for violence dimming. Going home, washing the blood and gore from him, and crashing sounded pretty fucking good right now. But he knew he’d have Gillian on his mind. She was always on his mind.
Chapter Seven “I’m so glad you changed your mind on that drink,” Gerald said from across the table. The restaurant they’d met at was on the high-end side, but to her surprise when she’d walked in, the place was empty. Gerald had paid for them to have the entire place to themselves, and to say it was a bit awkward was an understatement. Yes, she’d agreed to have a drink after thinking about where her life was going. She couldn’t pine for a man that she could never have, and although she didn’t feel anything for Gerald, getting out and being social, at least, was a step
in the right direction. But is it? Why am I a coward? Why can’t I just tell David what I want, how I feel for him? She supposed thinking those things was easier said than done. Fear had a way of holding onto someone, of making the simplest acts seem like a giant leap off a cliff. “I’d like to spend more time with you, maybe tonight, back at my place?” Gerald’s words took her back a bit, drew her out of her thoughts, and she knew she probably had her mouth hanging open a bit. “Excuse me?” She blinked a few times, her voice soft, not sure if what he was saying was actually what she
thought he meant. He leaned forward, the smile on his face anxious and filled with intent. “I just mean I’d love to keep the night going. We can have drinks back at my place, if you like?” She was shaking her head before he even finished speaking. “I’m sure it would be lovely, but it’s getting late, Gerald.” He kept smiling, but Gillian could see it was more forced than it had been initially. “I’m sorry. It’s just I have so much still to do at home.” He nodded, that damn smile still on his face. “No worries. We can plan for another time.” She smiled, nodding, but being polite. She didn’t want to seem rude
because her thoughts were elsewhere. Hell, Gerald might not have even been pushing toward what she thought he was. Maybe it had only been about drinks back at his place? Or maybe he’d wanted a lot more than that? Gillian supposed it didn’t matter since she wasn’t going home with him to test out the theory. “I’ll walk you to your car,” he said, stood, and walked over to her to pull her chair out. Gerald had been polite tonight, hadn’t really pushed anything aside from friendly conversation, and she felt a little like a bitch. They left the restaurant, and
Gerald stayed close to her side. There was a breeze in the air, and she tightened the shawl around her shoulders a bit more, but just as she did that Gerald wrapped his arm around her. “Cold?” he asked in a low voice. “I’m okay,” she said, not hating that he was touching her, but feeling weird. It’s because you haven’t had anyone touch you in any real capacity since the Brian attack, and your feelings for David have shaped everything you want, what you want to experience. “Here’s my car,” she said and turned out of his hold, pressing her back to her car. “Thank you for dinner,
Gerald. It was nice to get out of the house.” He didn’t speak for a second, and she swallowed, feeling the air become thicker. She knew what he was going to do right now, yet she was frozen in place, and unable to stop it. **** Don’t go in there and fuck this up for her. David breathed out slowly. Don’t go in there and kill that motherfucker. He looked at where the asshole was touching Gillian’s hand across the table. You had your chance to make her yours, and you didn’t take it.
But did he really miss out on his chance? He hadn’t brought this up because he didn’t want to crowd her, didn’t want to freak her the fuck out with what he wanted. Losing her, not having Gillian in his life in any capacity, would feel like he was slowly dying from the inside out. He’d gone to her house first, because he’d wanted to talk to her, to make sure she was feeling okay. He’d gotten the vibe last time that she had a lot on her mind, and all he’d been able to think about this whole time was her wanting to be with someone. He wasn’t a fucking idiot to think she’d stay single forever, especially when he hadn’t stepped up and told her how he felt. But
he also hadn’t been prepared for the allencompassing rage and possessiveness that filled him when she’d all but said she would start seeing people. Of course he’d known he’d be upset, and very territorial of her. For fuck’s sake, he followed her, made sure she was okay, and all of that was because he was madly in love with her. Gillian was his, whether she knew it or not, and watching her have dinner with some prick was pulling the string of his sanity until it was on the verge of snapping. He clenched his teeth and saw the smile on her face. She seemed happy, and he fucking hated the fact it was that prick that gave her that smile. They’d been in the restaurant for the last hour
and a half, a long fucking time, but David had been here the entire time. Like the motherfucker David was, he’d followed her, needing to see where she was going. And she went on a date with that asshole. He watched them leave the restaurant, and when the fucker put his arm around Gillian, David let out a low sound. He was seconds away from getting out of the vehicle and beating some ass, but Gillian moved away from the man and David forced himself to stay still. Going out there right now would not only make him look like a crazed asshole, but also scare the shit out of Gillian. He didn’t want that.
You either need to man the fuck up and tell her how you feel, or you need to back off and let her live her life. “Fuck,” he said in a low voice. He scrubbed his hand over his face and didn’t know what in the hell was wrong with him. He’d never been this type of person, not until the shit with Brian and his feelings for Gillian rose up. Now he was like some fucking animal trying to stake a claim on something that wasn’t his. No, she is mine. She’ll always be mine. He looked at them again, could see Gillian’s mouth moving as she spoke, and then watched the man say
something in return. Scrubbing his hand over his face again, David tried to rein in the motherfucker he had housed inside of him, the one that didn’t even want Gillian speaking to another man. David watched the asshole slowly lean in and kiss Gillian. And then, like someone unlocking the gate in which the beast inside of him was caged, David saw red, couldn’t even think straight anymore. Before he even knew what was happening, as if his body had a mind of its own, he found himself out of his car and striding toward where Gillian was. Gillian had her hands on the man’s chest, pushing him away. But the bastard leaned in again, pinning her to
the car. He said something low to her, something David couldn’t hear, but it wouldn’t have mattered anyway because all he saw was red, all he heard was the deep, animalistic sound coming from the violent, possessive motherfucker deep inside of him. Everything seemed to happen in slow motion as he watched Gillian push the man away gently. She then turned her head, clearly hearing David approach. The man did the same, looking at David with confusion on his face. David was in front of the man a second later, slamming his fist into the side of his face, and feeling predatory and pleased when the fucker fell on his ass. Sound rushed through his ears, and
he heard Gillian shouting at him, pushing at him. “Oh my God. David, what in the hell are you doing?” He didn’t answer. “David?” Gillian shouted again, and rushed over to the man on the ground. She started saying something to him, but all David could focus on was the blood that trickled out of Gillian’s date’s nose. She helped him off the ground, but David kept flexing and relaxing his hands, wanting to hit the asshole harder, but refraining because of the clear shock on Gillian’s face. She turned and faced him. “David, what are you doing?” Her eyes were wide, her voice strained. She started looking around the parking
lot. “Where in the hell did you come from, and why are you even here?” Her eyes were wide now, her voice getting higher, more frantic. You scared her, you motherfucker. He ran his hand over his mouth as he looked at her, knowing he’d fucked up, but unable to help himself. He took a step back. “David?” She said his name a little more softly this time. He shook his head while he looked at her, and when he glanced at the man now standing he narrowed his eyes. “Keep your fucking hands off of her.” He then turned and headed back to his car. Once in the driver’s seat he could see
Gillian staring at him. She wiped her cheek, and he cursed at himself that he’d made her cry, had scared the hell out of her. You don’t deserve her. He didn’t, but even knowing that he knew he couldn’t stay away.
Chapter Eight David slammed the front door shut, breathed in and out, and felt the last bit of sanity leaving him. He took off his jacket and tossed it aside, did the same with his shirt, his belt, and finally got rid of his pants until he was only in his boxers. He paced the room a few times, breathing heavily, needing some violence to get this angry energy out of him. He heard his cell going off again, and he knew it was Gillian calling. She’d called him three times as he drove to his place. He wanted to talk to her, to try to explain why he’d acted the way he did, but he’d scared her enough already tonight.
Telling her that I am so in love with her I can’t stand to have her touched by another man, that I am so obsessed with her that I’d kill to make sure she is safe, probably won’t go over well. When the cell went off, but started ringing again, he grabbed his pants off the floor and grabbed the phone out of the pocket. He stared at the screen, saw Gillian’s phone number, and curled his fingers tightly around the phone until it creaked in his grasp. He reared his arm back and chucked the fucking thing across the room. It slammed against the wall, shattering. He stood there for several seconds, listening to his rapid breathing, feeling like he
was going to morph into some kind of fucking insane beast. What he needed was a fight, or maybe go find the guy that had kissed Gillian. Yeah, that would make him feel a hell of a lot better. No, don’t make this worse than it is. She probably already hates you for going ballistic on the bastard. “You fucked up,” he said to himself right before he growled out and turned, slamming his fist into the wall behind him. Plaster crumbled under the hit, and he looked down at his hand. He uncurled his fingers, seeing blood and drywall covering his flesh, the cuts scattered around his skin. What he needed was a lot more pain and violence than this right now.
**** Gillian pulled the cell away from her ear and looked down at the screen. After a second she disconnected the call. She’d tried getting a hold of David since he left her standing there in the parking lot shocked as hell. And although he didn’t answer she just knew he was avoiding her calls. She sat on her couch and stared at the black TV screen, her body confused, her thoughts running wild. Gillian had tried to take Gerald to the hospital, because she thought his nose might have been broken. There was a lot of blood, but he’d adamantly told her no. He’d been angry, so angry that his entire demeanor had changed. Gillian couldn’t
blame him, though. David had come out of nowhere and hit him hard enough it had knocked Gerald back on his ass. The shock she felt had taken over her entire being, had her frozen in place, and unable to even think clearly for several moments. David had always had this hard demeanor about him, this aloofness that had others taking a step back because he seemed dangerous. But after the incident with Brian, David had changed. He became darker, his attitude more distant, more cautious. But he’d always been kind, gentle even with her, as if he thought she might break. But tonight he’d been someone else, had something violent surrounding
him she’d never seen in him before. I’ve never seen someone so angry, with a look of rage in his eyes tangible enough I felt it. Leaning forward on the couch and bracing her elbows on her knees, she thought about what in the hell she was going to do. The truth was she should be terrified of what she’d seen tonight from David. Actually, she was more shocked than anything. She’d felt horrible about what happened to Gerald, and even though she’d wanted to help him he’d been furious, pushing her away hard enough she had to brace a hand on the side of the car to steady herself. He’d stormed off, blood trailing from his nose, and the curses coming from him
fiercely. She’d tried talking to him, because heaven knows if something like that happened to her she’d be so confused and angry she probably couldn’t have seen straight. But Gerald hadn’t even wanted to look at her. Maybe he thinks it’s my fault? Maybe he thinks because of what David did I am to blame? Exhaling loudly, she listened to the clock ticking down the time. She should stay here, not worry about what David was doing, because he clearly wanted to be left alone. But she couldn’t ignore this, couldn’t ignore what she was feeling. He’d shocked her, but she found herself turned on all in the same
breath. Picking up her phone, she tried calling Gerald once more; just to make sure he was okay. But when his voicemail picked up she disconnected the call. Staring at the now black screen, she didn’t even bother trying to call David again. “Screw it,” she said and grabbed her purse off the coffee table, shoved her phone inside, and pulled her keys out. She wasn’t going to just sit on how she felt, just let David ignore her. He wouldn’t let her get away with this shit, and she wasn’t going to let him either. It was only a twenty-minute drive to where he lived, and whether he liked it or not they were going to talk
about this. The car ride to David’s place had Gillian feeling nervous, jittery, and not knowing what in the hell was going on, or what was to come. She should not feel anything but confusion and a bit of fear over what she witnessed tonight, but instead she felt this anxiousness to see him. She was slightly turned on, a fact that confused her even more, and had her feeling a little bit of self-disgust. The man she was deeply in love with had hurt someone tonight. There hadn’t been any provocation, but she replayed what David had said to Gerald before he’d turned and left. “Keep your fucking hands off of her.”
She shook her head at the thoughts. Why was he still so hung up on the past? She was moving on with her life, or trying to, but he was still worried someone was going to hurt her. She loved him even more for that, but in this situation it had gone too far, and over nothing. Gerald shouldn’t have kissed her in the first place, and he shouldn’t have gone in for a second one when she clearly hadn’t wanted more, but that didn’t warrant David to go ballistic like he had. At least she didn’t think so. When she finally reached his home she cut the engine and stared up at the small apartment building he lived in. It was only three stories, older, and she knew many of the residents were elderly.
Maybe that’s why David liked living here because it was quiet and he wouldn’t be bothered? She knew he didn’t do socializing all that well, not because he was awkward about it, but because he just stayed away from the public in general. He was the epitome of the strong and silent type. She cut the engine and breathed out, a part of her saying this wasn’t the best plan she’d ever had. David clearly wanted to be alone, to deal with whatever he was going through, and as much as she should have respected that, she couldn’t let this go. She loved him, and whatever he was dealing with she wanted to be there for him. Grabbing her purse and getting
out of the car, she headed inside. David’s place was on the basement level, and once she stood in front of his door she could only stare at it for several seconds. Gillian finally knocked on the scarred wood and then took a step back. After several seconds she knocked again, but when there wasn’t an answer she tried the doorknob. To her surprise it turned, and she pushed the door open. The first thing she noticed was David’s clothes on the floor. Stepping all the way in and shutting the door behind her, Gillian looked around for him. The sound of pounding coming from the back room had her following the noise. The door was cracked to a room, and she pushed it open another inch. The
sight in front of her had her heart beating a little faster, had her breath seizing in her lungs, and had everything tightening. David had his back to her and wore only a pair of dark boxers. She could see he had a band wrapped around his arm that held his iPod, and a pair of earbuds tucked in his ears. The sound of the music was loud, even though he was wearing the earbuds. A beat to hell punching bag hung from the ceiling, and David was going to town on it, beating the shit out of it. Sweat covered his muscular back, and the sight of his biceps flexing and releasing every time he slammed a fist into the bag was stark. Droplets of sweat beaded on his back, and the lines of tattoos that banded
around his forearms and biceps looked like something a primitive war hero might sport. Maybe he should have made her presence known, but she was too transfixed by him. And that was when he turned to the side slightly, and she could see the blood covering the punching bag. Looking down at the parts of his hands she could see, Gillian saw the blood cover his knuckles, and even spotted the drops on the floor. Should I just back away and leave, give him the space he obviously wants? She held onto the door handle harder than she should have, but she couldn’t breathe, couldn’t even think. There was a part of her that knew David
was dark, had this frightening part of him, and that’s why people didn’t make eye contact with him, why they moved out of his way. But there was also a part of her, a big part that had her growing warm and accepting of witnessing this side of him. She’d never seen him so raw, so broken. Right now he looked like he could kill someone with his bare hands. With sweat covering his hard, muscular body, the dangerous looking lines of tattoos along his back and arms, and the blood dripping from his hands, David was the epitome of what a man was supposed to look like, or at least the type of man that she grew warm for. No, David is the only one that makes me feel this way. David is the
only one that can make me see blood and violence and get wet because of it. She stood there, motionless, and watched as he looked down at his knuckles. He wiped them off on his boxers, then took his earbuds out. She held her breath, knowing her eyes were wide, and felt her hands shaking. Everything in her was on alert, not because she feared this man, but because she was so … aroused. And then he turned, his head downcast for a moment, the sweat dripping from the tips of his short hair. Her muscles grew taut, her heart beating as fast as a hummingbird’s. When he slowly lifted his head and their gazes locked, she expected to see a bit of
shock from him that she stood there, but he held an emotionless expression. David removed the strap from his arm, and tossed it onto the tattered chair pushed up against the wall. They stood there for several seconds, neither moving nor speaking, and the air becoming tense, thicker. “I…” she said, but the words died in her throat. David walked toward her, and she swore her heart stopped beating. She moved to the side when it was clear he wasn’t going to stop, and she turned her head to see him leave the room and walk down the hallway. Looking back into the room, Gillian focused on the smeared blood that covered the punching bag and
the droplets that were on the floor. The sound of glasses clanking together drew her attention away from the gore, and she moved down the hall and into the kitchen. David had his back to her again, and she could see he was pouring liquor into a glass. He brought it to his mouth, and repeated the action three times before finally turning around. The sweat was starting to dry on his body, and the scent of him, clean, untamed, and primitive, filled her head. A bloody rag was on the counter beside him, and she looked at his knuckles again, seeing the fresh cuts on them now that the red fluid was smeared off. “What are you doing here?” he asked in his deep, serrated voice.
She shook her head, not sure what to say, or maybe she just didn’t know how to form the words right now. As it was her throat was thick and her whole body was still strung so tight. “I wanted to talk about what happened,” she managed to say, but her words were high-pitched, and even now hard to get out. “There’s nothing to talk about, Gillian,” David said and grabbed his now refilled glass. He stared at her as he tossed the liquor back and swallowed it in one go. “You saw what happened.” She shook her head again, not sure where this whole demeanor came from. He seemed different, a lot different, in fact.
“There’s a lot to talk about, David.” Gillian finally found her voice and reason. She’d come here to speak to David about what in the fuck he’d done out of the blue, and she wasn’t going to let her feelings and this sudden, misplaced arousal stop her from doing that. David didn’t say anything, but did set his now empty glass back on the counter. He crossed his arms over his chest, and she couldn’t help but appreciate the sight of all that muscle flexing under his golden, tatted up skin. Get a fucking grip. That’s not why I’m here. “I want to know what happened, David. You came out of nowhere,
knocked Gerald on his ass, and then just left.” “Is that the fucker’s name?” Although he phrased it like a question, Gillian had a feeling he wasn’t really looking for affirmation. She felt her strength and resolve rise after the words came out. “I’ve only ever seen you like that once before.” Her throat tightened as that night rose up in her mind. She also noticed the change in David after she spoke. He uncrossed his arms, curled his hands into fists at his sides, and she could see how tight his jaw was. He was upset. She took a step a back involuntarily, not because she was afraid
he might hurt her, but as if it were instinct. It was like she backed away from a caged animal ready to leave and never look back. How she felt made no sense, but right now, her emotions, had her feeling like she was ready to be swallowed up by the earth. “You’re afraid of me now.” Still his expression was emotionless. “No,” she said instantly. He relaxed, somewhat, and she had a feeling he did it for show, to somehow ease her. “I’d never hurt you.” “I know that.” And she did, without a doubt. Right now things just felt so strange, so off kilter. “I’d never let anyone hurt you, Gillian,” he said again, harder this time.
She swallowed. “I know.” All those years ago was proof of that, but that still didn’t excuse what in the hell had happened with Gerald, and it wasn’t like she was going to let this go. She needed to know why David ad done what he’d done. She took a step toward him now, wanting to hug him, to try to get rid of this weird atmosphere that was bouncing between them. He shook his head, though, stopping her. “You should probably go, Gillian. I’m not in a good place right now.” His voice was still so deep, but it wasn’t just that he was so masculine, but that he seemed in pain, like his emotions were pulled in two different directions.
She could relate to that. But for the first time since David came into her life, and even though she knew she could always count on his strength for stability, she was genuinely worried he was falling apart. She worried she wouldn’t be able to rescue him in the way he’d saved her, and that broke her heart.
Chapter Nine The longer David stared at her, the more he fucking hated himself. He should have demanded that she leave, because truth was he didn’t want her seeing him like this. He was unhinged, and for as long as he’d been in her life he’d made sure to keep his composure. That’s why he went off and fought, because showing any kind of weakness or emotion in front of her wasn’t what he wanted to do. “I know you’d never let anyone hurt me, David, but I’m worried about you, about what’s going on.” Her voice was so soft, so feminine. He was so fucking in love with
her, but he couldn’t even be himself around her. It was a damn tragedy that he couldn’t be with the woman he loved. “I’d die before I let what happened all those years ago repeat.” God forbid if anyone even tried to touch her, because their fate would be the same as when he fucked up Brian. David knew a day didn’t go by that the motherfucker didn’t think about the mistake he made seven years ago. That’s exactly how David wanted it to go, too. “Talk to me,” she said, and moved another step closer. All he’d wanted was to make her his, to show her that she was meant to be with him. The stalking—which he could admit was
what he did with her—wasn’t because he was a fucking psycho, but because he worried about her. She’ll never see it like that. “Just let me in. You know you can trust me.” She moved another step closer, her hands slightly out as if she were trying to corral a wounded animal. You are a fucking animal of the worst kind. The wall he had around himself to protect her cracked as he stared into her eyes. “If I let you in you’d run, Gillian.” He shouldn’t have said anything, especially when he saw her eyes widen after he spoke. But he had to be honest with her. “You’d be so fucking frightened of me, Gillian, and I can’t
allow that.” She swallowed, and he watched her throat work at the act. “You didn’t seem to care if I was afraid when you came out of the blue and hit Gerald.” He clenched his jaw. “I don’t want to scare you. That’s the last thing I want to do, and why I want you to leave. I’m not in a good place right now.” She just shook her head slowly. “I don’t want to leave you here like this, David. I don’t want to leave at all. I want you to talk to me about what in the hell happened with you and Gerald—“ “Don’t say his name, Gillian. Hearing that motherfucker’s name doesn’t do anything but have me right back there.” He was getting pissed at
just thinking of that fucker touching her, kissing her … being with her in ways David would never be. “David,” she whispered his name, and his gut clenched. He closed his eyes, trying to rein in his emotions. He needed to do right by her, to make her see that no matter what she didn’t have to worry about him, or hell, his sanity. “I’d kill anyone that thought they could touch you, hurt you.” He opened his eyes. “That won’t ever go away. I’ve always felt that way since I walked in on Brian attacking you.” “David, you don’t have to have your life revolve around me. You don’t have to worry if I’ll get myself into
another mess.” “It wasn’t your fucking fault what happened with that prick.” His voice had gone louder, deeper, his rage right there at the surface as that night rose up in him in memories. She took a step back, her eyes still wide. He’d never raised his voice at her, and aside from her seeing him break apart when he was beating Brian, he’d made sure to keep his composure always in place. “Fuck, I’m sorry, Gillian.” He moved closer to her, but she moved on back. He could see she wasn’t afraid of him, but she was unsure about this situation. He scrubbed a hand over his face, feeling like he was about to tear right through his skin.
“Why can’t you open up to me?” He dropped his hand to his side and saw the pained expression on her face. “You’re the closest person to me, David, the one I trust with anything. I hoped you felt the same.” I do. “But if you want me to go, I’ll go.” But she still stood there for several seconds, not moving, her attention on him. He didn’t speak, didn’t know what the fuck to say. Telling her the truth was harder than he fucking knew it should be. Explaining that for years he’d been following her, wasn’t exactly something that would bring them closer together. But he had to tell her something, to give
her that peace of mind that he cared about her, trusted her, and was here because of her. She stared at him for only a second longer before finally speaking. “Okay, I’ll go. But I’m here, David. You know that. I’ll always be here for you.” She turned and started leaving. He took a step closer, the wanting to grab her, the need to pull her close, raging war inside of him. “I went after him because he kissed you, thought he had the right to put his fucking hands on you.” David finally just blurted the fucking truth out about tonight. He curled his hands into fists at his sides again. She turned and looked at him, her brows knitted with her clear
confusion. “You hit him over the kiss?” He didn’t bother answering. “But where did you come from? How did you even know I was out with him?” He clenched his jaw, felt his teeth start to grind together, and knew he should tell her what he’d been doing, how he’d watched her, followed her, did everything in his power to make sure she was never truly alone. All of his emotions for her, his love, the need to have her as only his, claimed him like a fucking beast tearing a city down. His muscles grew tight, his entire body waging war with his brain, with what was common sense and reality.
And then she moved closer and placed her hand on his chest. He looked down, feeling electricity move through him at that small touch. Her skin felt hot against him, and her hand was so small, her fingers slightly shaking. He lifted his head and saw she was looking right in his eyes, their gazes locked. He didn’t know what was happening right now, but he felt the intensity, felt his need for her create this energy, make all reason and reality leave. He should have stepped away, should have made her leave, because what he wanted to do, and what he was going to end up doing, could very well ruin everything. But instead of saying what he should, or at least telling her what he’d
really been up to, he placed his hand on top of hers, right over his chest, and applied pressure. He liked having her hand on him, liked the heat he felt. “David,” she whispered his name, and his cock jerked. The fucker was getting hard just from the close proximity of Gillian, from the sweet scent of her. “I just…” She didn’t finish speaking, and he lowered his gaze to her lips, watched her run her tongue along them, and found himself hardening even more. And because he didn’t know what the fuck he was doing, and because he couldn’t have stopped himself if he even wanted to, he cupped his free hand
on the back of her head, held her in place, and leaned forward. He kissed her like this was the last time he ever saw her, and maybe it was. What he expected was for her to pull away, to look at him with disgust, shock, hurt even. What he didn’t expect was to hear the moan come from her, or to feel her kissing him back. He ran his tongue along her bottom lip, tasting the sweet flavor on her mouth. He curled his hand around her head even more, dug his fingers into her hair, and pulled her impossibly closer. And then she did pull away, their lips breaking apart, their breathing haggard. “David.” Her voice was soft, her
lips red and glossy. “I shouldn’t have done that,” he said in a low voice, still looking at her mouth, still holding onto her. The silence stretched between them for several seconds, and then she rose on her toes, wound her arms around his neck, and fucking kissed him. He groaned, loving that she opened her mouth wide for him, and plunged his tongue into the warm, sweet recess of her mouth. “Maybe I should go, David,” she panted against his mouth, but it didn’t sound very convincing. He looked down at her, seeing the drugged expression on her face, the clear fact she was aroused.
“This is crazy.” The sound of her whispered words had his cock jerking behind his boxers. “Maybe it is crazy, but I can’t stop now that I started.” He cupped her cheek, holding onto her, feeling like she’d leave, escape like a frightened little animal. This dam had been opened inside of him, and his arousal, his need and all the emotions he had for Gillian, were out in the open. He might not have told her he fucking loved her, but his cock prodding her belly had to be clue enough that he wanted her. “You can’t stop?” She lowered her gaze to his mouth, and he could see the way her pulse beat faster beneath her ear.
“I can’t let you leave, Gillian. I won’t. This has been started, and I know you want it, too.” He had no control over his actions anymore, not right now, and not with Gillian so responsive to him. “Tell me how you feel.” She didn’t answer for several seconds, and in that time he turned them and walked her backward until the wall stopped her. “What’s happening, David?” She sounded scared, her voice shaking slightly. “Do I frighten you?” he asked and leaned down so their mouths were only inches apart. She nodded once, but arched her chest, pressing her breasts against him.
“Yes,” was all she said. “Do you want to hold back from me?” He was challenging her, and he didn’t know why he’d let himself get to this point. He should have been stronger, should have controlled himself better around her. But the events of tonight, the need he’d had built up inside of him, and having Gillian here right now, were his undoing. “I don’t have anything holding me back. Not anymore.” She swallowed on that last word, and he knew she wasn’t being honest with herself or him. He reveled in the smoothness of her skin and felt like the world was crashing down around him. It was because of this woman that he’d move
heaven and earth to please. It was because of his feelings for her that he’d walk through hell just to see her smile, if that’s what she wanted. “Tell me what you want, Gillian.” He knew what he wanted, but he wasn’t going to go there at this moment. He wanted to see what she wanted, where she stood. She stared into his eyes, and he felt his heart beat a little faster at the vulnerability he saw. God, did this woman know the power she held over him? Fuck, did he realize the power she held over him? You know exactly what she does to you, exactly how much power she exerts over you with just one look.
“If I let myself feel these emotions they might ruin us, what we have, David.” She whispered the words, and although she spoke them, she also didn’t try to move away. In fact, she pressed her breasts more firmly to his chest, and he moved an inch closer, impossibly closer. “Nothing will get ruined, baby.” At least that’s what he told himself. She shook her head, and the smile she gave him broke his fucking heart. “I could ruin everything, and it wouldn’t take anything at all.” She’s trying to fight this. “I owe you a lot, David. Not only because you were there for the Brian shit, but because after that you
stuck by my side.” His heart beat faster at her admission. “I’ll always be here for you,” he said softly, their lips still inches apart. “When it seemed like I was breaking, like everyone around me was going in the other direction, you were always there.” If she really knew him, knew what he’d done and how close he’d really been to her, then she wouldn’t be looking at him with such gentleness right now. Then fucking tell her all of it. He was too afraid of losing her to say a damn word. And before anything else could be said he kissed her hard
and deep, just wanting to forget anything that didn’t have to do with right here, right now.
Chapter Ten David kissed her like she was about to leave him forever, like she’d just disappear and he’d never have this chance again. Everything else didn’t matter aside from this one moment and making Gillian feel good, making her see that he wanted her above all else. David couldn’t have walked away from her if a gun had been pressed to his head, but it seemed it didn’t matter because Gillian was moaning and kissing him back, just as fiercely. She speared her hands in his hair, tugged at the strands, and made these small noises in the back of her throat. He swallowed the sounds,
needing more, and wanting her to surrender every part of herself to him. This was what he’d wanted from the moment he realized he couldn’t let her be with anyone else, that he wanted her as his own. It had been so fucking hard staying back, keeping his feelings in check, but right now none of that mattered. He took a step back, planning on taking her to the bedroom, because he couldn’t stop this, couldn’t stop what he wanted. And what he wanted was her under him, submitting in every way imaginable. “I don’t want you to let me go,” she whispered. He froze, looked down at her,
and saw her eyes still closed, her mouth slightly parted. He moved his thumb along her bottom lip, pulled the soft, slightly damp flesh down, and watched it move back into place when he let go. She was so fucking beautiful, so pliant for him, giving, and not letting her inhibitions control her. Whatever happened when this was all over was still a mystery, but right now he could show her how precious she was to him, that he’d do anything for her, even kill without a second thought. “No way in fucking hell would I ever let you go, Gillian.” She opened her eyes and looked at him, the vulnerability right there at the surface. He cupped her cheek in his
hand, tilting her head back an inch more. “You’re mine. You’ve always been mine.” Her breath hitched a bit, and he leaned down and took her mouth in a kiss again. She felt good in his arms, really fucking good, in fact, and he knew he wouldn’t be able to let her go. I can’t walk away from this again. I can’t hide what I want from her. Everything needs to be out in the open. But as he thought that, he heard her moans, her increased breathing, and all he could think about was making her feel good. Once he had claimed her, fucked
her and let her know she was his, David wasn’t going to stop making her see she was his. But will she want you when you tell her everything? Will she want you when you reveal your dark secrets? After several seconds she broke the kiss and looked up at him. Her lips were swollen, red, and wet from their kissing. She didn’t speak for several moments, but he didn’t push her into saying anything she wasn’t ready to. Finally she exhaled and spoke. “There is a part of me that feels like what we’re doing is wrong, like it’ll all get ruined.” She looked at his lips, and he couldn’t hold back the groan. He could relate to what she felt.
Hell, that was the reason he hadn’t even confessed what he wanted with her. “Is this what you want?” He stroked her cheek with his thumb. She nodded. “Does it scare you?” She nodded again. “And you feel good being up against me?” She closed her eyes, licked her lips, and whispered, “Yes.” “Then doesn’t that mean it’s real, that it’s right?” She opened her eyes again, reached up, and touched his chest, right over his heart. “Yes.” Don’t think about anything else but right now.
He pushed any thoughts out of his head that didn’t focus on this moment, of the woman he loved in front of him. He didn’t stop himself from kissing her again. “How can this be so wrong when it feels so damn good, baby?” he groaned the words against her mouth. “The only thing that matters is us and what we want. No one and nothing else matters.” “I know, but it’s still scary, David.” “I know, baby.” He smiled, an act he’d only ever done for her. She was the only person that could make him feel other things aside from the rage, jealousy, and violent energy that consumed him.
He slipped his hand behind her head and gripped the base of her skull. “This can be so damn easy, Gillian.” His mouth was close to hers, but he didn’t lean in that last inch and kiss her. She stared at him for a second, and he wondered if she’d stop this, common sense that he’d once been her stepfather, making her realize this wasn’t “right”. But as the seconds ticked by, he realized this couldn’t be stopped, not by either of them. And then she slammed her mouth on his, sucked at his tongue, and pressed her chest to his. Her breasts were big, round, and his cock gave a mighty jerk. She moaned against this mouth, and he knew she’d felt it, felt his hard length,
maybe even getting wetter because of it. “I’m going to make you feel so fucking good, Gillian.” He pulled back and looked at her again. “Do you trust me to take care of you?” Her mouth was parted, her pupils dilated, and when she licked her lips and then nodded, he let the beast fully free. He kissed her again and again, hard, consuming kisses that had her gasping and panting out against him. “I’m so tired of being alone, David,” she murmured against his mouth, and kissed him harder, with more desperation. He knew exactly how she felt. Their tongues slid along each other, frantically, heated, and full of
need. He was hard, so fucking hard for her that he had to grind his erection into her belly to ease the ache. He felt this carnal need for her, one that wasn’t just about wanting to feel himself buried balls deep inside of her, but one that told him she was his irrevocably. She was pliant in his arms, pressing her breasts against his chest, her nipples hard, her arousal coating the air. He could practically smell it coming from her, a floral, sweet scent that drove him fucking insane. He felt drunk for her, higher than a fucking kite. No woman had ever made him feel this way, and although he’d known she was the only one for him already, this moment cemented that fact.
David moved his hand lower until he got to the hem of her shirt, and he instantly felt her shaking. But as if she knew he would stop to see if she was okay, she placed her hand over his, and urged it up, bringing the material over her belly. She didn’t stop him, and in fact arched her back for more. At the first contact of his bare flesh against hers, of his fingers along her smooth skin, she gasped. “That’s it,” he said against her mouth. “I could take every part of you right now until there was nothing left and I’d still need more, Gillian.” “Then give me more, David.” He curled his fingers against her side, knowing he’d leave marks on her
delicate flesh if he weren’t gentle. Moving his hand up higher, he felt the fact she wasn’t wearing a bra. His dick punched forward even harder, and he felt the front of his boxers become wet from pre-cum. Covering one of her breasts with his hand, he ran his tongue along her bottom lip at the same time. When took her nipple between his thumb and forefinger and pulled at the already turgid flesh, hard, probably a little painfully, she arched into him even more. Over and over he pulled at her nipple, kissing her like he was drowning and she was the only source of oxygen. The pants she wore had to go, too. David needed her naked, needed her hot, soft body pushed against his. He
moved his hands to the waistband of her pants, but stopped and started kissing her more possessively once again, moving his mouth down to the base of her neck. He felt her pulse beating rapidly, and he licked and sucked at the spot, drawing the blood up to the surface and marking her. Yeah, he was a primitive fucker, marking her like she was his property. No, not your property, but yours to claim. “David,” she whispered his name, but it was also coupled with a moan. He wanted his handprints on her body, wanted his teeth marks on her skin. David wanted her screaming out his
name as he filled her with his cock, plunged his shaft in and out of her until she came undone. “I want to go further, baby,” he said against her throat. “I want to be inside of you, Gillian.” “Don’t stop.” She slanted her mouth on his and speared her tongue between his parted lips. She acted desperate for him, and fuck, did that turn him on. He grabbed the hem of her shirt, and in a swift move pulled the material up and off of her body. He’d been teasing the edge of her pants, but he had those off in a matter of seconds. There she stood in only a pair of panties. He reached between them and palmed his cock through his boxers, the material
damp with pre-cum where his dick head pressed against it. “So fucking beautiful.” He cupped her breasts with his hands, squeezed the mounds until she was closing her eyes and breathing like she couldn’t get enough air into her lungs. “I need more. I need it all from you.” He was already near his breaking point. Moving his hands lower, he cupped her ass through the cotton material, and then slid the material inward so it became tucked between her luscious ass cheeks. For a suspended moment all he did was hold the big globes while he mouth-fucked her. “Christ, baby,” he panted the words out, never before being this
turned on. “I’m so fucking hard for you.” He moved his mouth to her ear and whispered, “I need you, Gillian.” He felt her nod. “I need to be inside of you now.” She shivered in his hold. “Then be with me, David.” Any amount of sanity he’d had was gone, right out the fucking window and never coming back.
Chapter Eleven Am I really doing this? David kissed Gillian hard, and held onto her ass like he wanted to leave bruises on her flesh. Do I want to open this door? The underwear was between the cheeks of her bottom, and David kept moving his fingers closer to her pussy. That door is already open, and there is no chance of closing it. It was like an animal had been unleashed inside of David, like he couldn’t control himself and wanted her to know that fact. He pressed her fully against the wall, his entire body big, hard, so ready for what he promised.
She couldn’t breathe, couldn’t even think straight, and when he moved his hand between them she felt like she’d explode from the sensations coursing through her. “I want you so fucking bad,” he said against her neck, licking, sucking, and leaving his mark on her. Before she knew what was happening they were both naked and she felt beads of perspiration covering the valley between her breasts and the length of her spine. She wasn’t a virgin, wasn’t even a prude, but what she was experiencing with David right now was unlike anything she’d ever done or felt with a man. A part of her warned her this may be a horrible idea, that their
relationship was too engrained to go in this direction, but another part, the stronger side, the one that didn’t care what happened because she was finally being with the man she loved, wouldn’t let her focus on the repercussions for too long. Being with the man I love can’ t be wrong, right? He kissed her again, harder and faster than before, his cock like a steel rod between them, pressing against her belly. There was no stopping this, but God, she didn’t want to. She’d been hiding her feelings for so long that having them actually free felt a little weird, but also exciting and exhilarating at the same time. Right now
all she could think about was their hot, sweaty bodies pressed together. “That’s it, Gillian baby. Christ, the fact you’re so damn primed for me, so receptive to my touches, makes this so fucking incredible.” David had his hands on her bare ass, his finger clenching on the mounds repeatedly. She wanted the panties off, but she also wanted him to take control, to do with her as he pleased. He removed his mouth from her neck and started kissing her again, but at the same time lifted her off the ground and held her easily in his arms with his strength. When she moaned he grunted in pleasure, and held onto her ass even harder, almost painfully. But that
discomfort felt so damn good. He was so strong, holding her up against the wall easily, his strength pouring from him and making her feel so feminine. “I want you so fucking badly, baby.” He started thrusting against her pussy. “Then have me, David. Have every part of me.” He grunted and thrust his hard cock against her pussy, the length big, huge in fact. “Please.” Gillian didn’t care that she begged him, that she sounded desperate. Right now she just wanted to feel him pushing into her, stretching her pussy, claiming every inch of her. She’d worry about the other shit later.
The feel of his steely shaft had her inner muscles clenching. She grew so wet she knew he’d have no trouble pushing that thickness into her body. Gillian wanted to feel so full she couldn’t stand it, couldn’t even breathe. “God, David, I am so ready for you.” “Yeah, you are, baby. I’m not going to prolong this anymore. I need you too fucking much.” He kept one hand on her ass, and moved the other between their bodies. It was a testament to his power when he held her up easily with only one hand, and damn did that make her wetter. With his hand on her ass he snaked it closer to her pussy and tugged at her panties,
pulling them aside so her pussy was exposed. With his other hand he took hold of his cock and placed it at her entrance. While still kissing her, he rubbed his cock along her cleft, up and down, and bumping her clit with every upstroke. “Fuck, you are so wet for me, so ready for my dick.” He looked right in her eyes, and she nodded. “Tell me you’re ready, that you want this.” She felt his dick throb between her thighs, and felt her slickness slip from her pussy and slide down her inner thigh. They held each other’s stares for several long seconds, and then they crashed their mouths together at the same time. She grabbed onto the back of his
head, pulled at the strands of his hair, needing him as close as he could get. Groans spilled from both of them. For years Gillian had imagined —fantasized—about being with David. Images of them together, skin wet with sweat, David above her, his muscles taut, his power immense, filled her head. She was at the point that she wanted him shoved so deep inside of her nothing else mattered. “Fuck me, David.” He stilled for only a moment, and then pulled his head back just an inch to look her in the eyes. “There’s no going back from this once it’s started.”
She nodded. Gillian didn’t want to go back, even if going forward was just as scary. She shifted in his arms so the tip of his cock was pressed and inch into her pussy. Already she felt the stretch start to take root, and he wasn’t even fully inside of her. For a moment time seemed to stand still. There wasn’t any confusion, no worry of what was going to happen because of her actions. Right now there was only she and David. He still held her body up with one hand holding onto her ass and placed his other hand on the wall beside her head, his bicep flexing with his strength. The tip of his cock was now lodged in her body, and they both
breathed out roughly, neither moving this along just yet. “I’m going to fuck you until you only want me, baby, until you realize you’re only mine.” “I only want you, David.”He thrust his hips forward, pushing another inch into her. David groaned and closed his eyes. “You’re so fucking tight, hot, and wet.” He pushed yet another inch into her, and the burning sensation took root, the stretching feeling claiming her fully. She clenched her pussy around his shaft involuntarily. He grunted in pleasure. “How’s it feel, baby?” She squeezed her eyes shut when
he thrust even more of his thick shaft into her. “It feels so good,” she moaned the words. He rested his forehead against hers, and they panted against each other’s mouths. “It feels so fucking good, baby.” He was out of breath, just like she was. “But we’ve just gotten started, Gillian.” In one swift move he was buried fully inside of her. She let her head fall back against the wall, the sound of her skull hitting it loud, but not dimming the erotic noises coming from them. “Yeah, baby, give in just like that.” David pulled out just an inch and thrust back into her. He started moving in and out of her, faster and harder, but all
the while looking right into her eyes. “Watch me. Look right at me as I fuck you up against the wall.” “David.” She parted her mouth and gasped when he hit something deliciously good inside of her. “Christ, baby.” He went slow and easy, in and out, gentle and thorough, but as the seconds moved by his motions became faster, harder. “Fucking hell, Gillian.” He was so far inside of her there wasn’t a part of her David wasn’t touching. She couldn’t even think straight, let alone form words. The sounds of their flesh slapping together, of his cock sliding in and out of her pussy, had her pleasure mounting. The
sounds that came from her were low, erotic, and would have humiliated her if she wasn’t so turned on, so aroused by this man. I love you so much. She kept those words to herself. Gillian was finally being with David, and it was the most incredible thing she’d ever experienced. The root of his cock rubbed against her clit every time he slammed into her. “You feel so good.” He closed his eyes and groaned. He pushed fully into her, stilled, and moved his hips to the side slightly, having a different kind of sensation filling her. “Squeeze that pussy around me, baby.” He ground the
words out. Sweat beaded his brow, and he made this low, animalistic sound when he pulled out and then slammed into her especially hard. With each passing second he took her faster and harder. The burn of her back rubbing against the wall heightened her pleasure, and she felt her climax mounting. “I want to see you come for me.” He let a moment of silence pass before he spoke again. “I want to feel you squeezing my cock, milking the cum from me.” He reached between them and pressed his thumb to her clit, rubbing the bud back and forth while he still tunneled in and out of her. David kissed her once more, but then ran his tongue along her bottom lip, over her cheek, and
licked at the shell of her ear. His breathing was short, but hard pants, and she could tell he was close to getting off, too. “You’re mine, Gillian,” he said so low against her ear she didn’t know if she’d heard him correctly. He slammed into her again, applied more pressure to her clit until she was about to explode for him, but right when she was there he slowed his motions. Gillian wanted to cry out from desperation, but before she could do or say anything he grunted against her ear, clearly barely holding on, as well. “Tell me you’re mine.” That’s all I’ve ever wanted. He was thrusting in and out of
her like a madman now, in and out, faster and harder, and she got so lost in the sensation, that she felt herself falling over the edge once more. “I’m yours,” she moaned out the words he wanted to hear, that she’d always wanted to say. She came long and hard, and heard him groan against her neck. “Say it again, Gillian baby.” He growled out the words like an animal, and Gillian knew this one night would forever shape their future, whether that would be good in the long run, or totally fucking disastrous. “I’m yours, David. I’m only yours.” She gasped when he slammed into her so hard she moved up an inch. Her back scraped up the wall, but that
pain heightened her pleasure to a fever pitch. The world was falling away, but she didn’t care about that. She only cared about right here and now. Lights flashed in front of her vision as she came, and she forced her eyes to stay open through her pleasure. Seeing David get off was unlike anything she’d ever witnessed. It was so arousing, and she didn’t want to miss the pleasure she’d brought out in him. She felt his cock swell inside of her, felt him get impossibly harder, and she parted her mouth at the sensations. The feeling of him coming, of his seed filling her, was hot, erotic, and had her pleasure climbing even higher. He slowed his thrusting, and when several
moments passed he pulled back and looked in her eyes once more. “You’re okay?” She nodded and smiled. She was more than okay. Gillian loved this man more than anything else, and although she was happy that she was finally with him, it also scared the hell out of her. God, I hope this doesn’t tear us apart.
Chapter Twelve David had brought Gillian back to his room. For the last hour he’d just been lying here listening to the sound of her breathing, watching her back slowly rise and fall, and finally running his fingers over the curve of her spine. But now he was on the edge of the bed, his forearms on his thighs, his thoughts heavy. He needed to tell her about who he really was, and what he’d been doing all these years. But the thought of ruining this, of telling her his darkest secret, his twisted desires, scared the shit out of him. The sound of Gillian rustling behind him had David looking over his
shoulder at her. She stretched, the sheet moving slightly down to her lower back. The curve of her ass and the crease between the cheeks was visible, and he felt his cock harden once more. He could have gone all night with her, but he knew he’d been on the rougher side, and pushing her wasn’t what he wanted. David wanted her to be with him on her own, because she wanted him just as much as he wanted her. “David?” Gillian said in a sleepfilled voice. He still looked at her as she slowly pushed herself up and looked at his side of the bed. She rubbed her eyes, her hair tussled, her cheeks still pink from their fucking.
“I’m right here, baby,” he said and reached out to rub his hand along her foot that peeked out from under the sheet. “Is everything okay?” She was facing him now, the sheet at her waist, but still showing him a glimpse of the trimmed hair that covered her pussy. God, he could just tackle her to the bed and fuck her until she couldn’t even form a coherent word. But he didn’t answer her, just turned away and looked at where his hands were clasped together. The soft touch of her fingers on his back had him tensing, and he knew prolonging this was only going to make it that much worse, and that much harder. “We need to talk,” he spit the
words out, angry with himself, but knowing what the right thing to do was. When she didn’t answer he looked at her over his shoulder, and saw this worried expression on her face. “Our relationship is ruined, isn’t it?” Fuck, he hated that she sounded so damn vulnerable right now. “You didn’t do anything wrong, baby.” He turned fully and pulled her close so she was nearly on his lap. He just held her, the sheet loosely wrapped around her body, her head resting on his shoulder. “I worried what we did ruined what we have.” She was tracing one of his tattoos, and he watched her finger go
over the sharp edge that covered his forearm. “David?” “Yeah, baby?” He kept his voice low. She was silent for a moment longer than was probably normal, and he pulled back slightly. “Hey, are you okay?” She looked up at him and smiled, but she was nervous, he could tell. “I love you.” Her voice was soft, hesitant. “I’m in love with you, David.” His heart stopped, his gut grew tight, and he felt a happiness he’d never felt before. He cupped both of her cheeks and kissed her senseless. He kissed her until his lips were sore. When he pulled back it was to see her smiling, but she still had that tenseness about her. “I love you, too, baby.” He
rested his forehead on hers and closed his eyes. “I’m so fucking in love with you.” She wrapped her arms around him, and for the longest time they just held each other. But he knew what had to be done. “And that’s why saying this is so damn hard.” **** Her heart was beating so hard and fast for a second Gillian wondered if it was possible to burst through her chest. She pulled the sheet more tightly around her body, shielding herself for whatever was to come, even if that ammunition was only words. Sometimes those hurt even more than a physical blow. For long seconds David didn’t
speak. He hadn’t bothered to get dressed or cover his nudity, but clearly he had more important things to worry about. Is he going to tell me how wrong this all was? Is he going to say we should have time to ourselves, to really sort this all out? “You’re kind of freaking me out here,” she said softly, seeing the concentration, even the worry on his face. He reached out and took hold of her hand, gave it a gentle squeeze, and then exhaled as if preparing himself for what was to come. “I love you.” He looked right in her eyes. “I’m so fucking in love with you, have been for years, Gillian.” She felt herself ease, felt that
pleasurable calm and happiness settle over her. Smiling, she gave his hand a squeeze back. “I feel the same way.” There was just a second of surprise that covered his face, but it was soon replaced by a dark look, one that took her back. “I want to be honest with you,” he said. She slowly nodded. “Okay.” She took her hand back and clasped it together with her other one. “I beat Brian because he fucked with you.” Gillian nodded. She really hoped they weren’t going to go down this road, because talking about that asshole after what they’d just done was not what she
wanted to do. “And ever since then my feelings for you have grown.” He was silent for a second. “They’ve grown into dark manifestations, Gillian. They’ve become abnormal to anyone looking in.” She felt her eyebrows knit because of his words. “I don’t understand what that means.” He showed no emotion, and back in place was the David she’d know all these years. His gaze was right on her, and she breathed in and out slowly. “I was there tonight because I followed you.” For a second all she could do was replay his words in her head. “You followed me?” she asked with confusion
in her voice. Had she heard him right? “I’ve been following you.” Another second of time passed. “I have been following you for years, but it’s because I love you so much, and am so fucking worried something will happen to you, that I’ve gone to those lengths.” Had he really just said what she thought he said? “You’ve been following me for years? Like … stalking me?” God, am I hearing this correctly? “When? How?” She shook her head. “I don’t understand any of this.” He reached out and tried to take her hand, but she pulled it back, so fucking confused. David exhaled and rubbed his hand over the back of his head, his bicep muscles flexing from the
act. “I follow you, Gillian.” His voice had gone hard as he looked at her. “I know where you go, what time you’re home, at work, hell, when you fucking go to the grocery store. I know all of this because I’ve become obsessed with you, and the very thought of you hurt, of another Brian incident happening, makes me insane.” Her heart stopped as she processed what he said. David, the man she’d been in love with for so many years, the man that saved her from being raped, and the man she’d just given herself to, admitted to stalking her. Shaking her head, and trying to make sense of this, all she came up with was confusion and heartache. The fact he’d
broken her trust by following her for all these years, dug right into her heart like a rusty blade. “I do what I do for you, Gillian. The very thought of you with another man sends me into a blind rage.” She pictured the instance with Brian, and now again with Gerald. “You hit Gerald because he kissed me, because you are—” “Because I love you, because you’re mine, only mine.” His voice had gone hard, his big body taut. “This isn’t right, David,” she whispered, searching for her clothing now. “Gillian,” he said her name and reached for her when she went to get off
the bed, but she just kept shaking her head, not knowing what to think or do. “I just…” What in the hell was she supposed to say? Was she overreacting? Should she be okay with the fact David admitted to stalking her, watching her every move? Her clothes were in the hallway, and as much as she just wanted to leave and get her head on straight, escaping during this screwed up situation seemed almost wrong. But she turned and faced him, the sheet still wrapped around her. “Why did you wait until now to tell me this?” A horrible thought came into her mind, but she tried to push it back. “I was afraid telling you would drive us apart. I was afraid admitting the
fucked up things I do would have you scared and running from me … like you are now.” Was she afraid of him? No, not afraid, just shocked, confused, and everything else in between. “I’m possessive of you, Gillian.” He stood, his big body still naked, and her own grew warm at that sight. “I won’t make any excuses, or be apologetic because of it.” He wasn’t hard, but that didn’t make his shaft any less impressive. The member was still a monster between his thighs. “I’d even go as far as to say I’m obsessed with you, so in love with you, Gillian, I can’t even think straight.” He took a step closer,
and she lifted her gaze to his face. “You’re the only thing that matters to me, that takes up my very existence.” “Why tell me now, after the fact?” He stopped advancing. “After the fact.” He repeated it, but it wasn’t phrased like a question. “You waited until after we had sex. Why? Was that planned? Did you want a piece of ass first?” God, don’t cry, don’t be weak. But I’m so confused and feel so betrayed. He knitted his brows, his expression becoming darker. “How can you say that, think that?” His voice was so hard, hurt even. “I don’t know what to think
anymore, David. The man I trusted more than anything else betrayed me. You’ve been following me, seeing my every move. You’ve invaded my privacy for years.” She felt her tears start to fall and wiped them away quickly. “Gillian, baby. Don’t cry.” He looked so pained that she wished she could just say fuck it all, forget about the fact the man she loved had been watching her, invading her privacy, and in a sense betraying her. How much had he seen? He admitted to watching everything and anything I ever did. He admitted it’s been going on for years. Looking at him once more, she turned and left the bedroom in search for
her clothes. Once she had her pants and shirt back on, she turned to see David coming down the hall, now wearing a pair of unbuttoned jeans. “Gillian, baby, please,” he said and moved toward her, but she held her hand out, which had him stopping. “Please, David. Please just let me go so I can get my head on straight.” She saw his broad, muscular shoulders sag slightly, and then he finally nodded. “I won’t stop you, not because I want you to go, but because I know I fucked up. I know I screwed everything up, Gillian. But I love you, dammit, and I wanted you to know everything. I don’t want to keep lying to you.” She didn’t respond, and instead
gave him one last lingering look before turning and leaving him standing in the living room.
Chapter Thirteen Several days later It had only been a few days since she left David’s place, and although she knew that wasn’t any time at all, Gillian felt like it had been an eternity. She’d thought about the situation so much that she’d had a headache these last several days, and although common sense told her a man watching her, following her every move, was wrong on every level, she also knew she wanted to talk to David about it more. She did love him, was still in love with him even after all of this. Her feelings couldn’t just be ignored or swept under the rug because of this incident. But she did feel
betrayed because he hadn’t been upfront with her. What am I going to do? Gillian loved David too much to just walk away from him and their friendship. She now knew how he felt, that he loved her as much as she loved him, but she couldn’t ignore the slightly twisted side of it all either. She hadn’t spoken to David since she left his house, and she knew him well enough, and the reason he hadn’t contacted her, was because he was respecting her wishes that she wanted this time to herself to think. But in the back of her mind she would look over her shoulder, wondering if he was watching her. She shouldn’t have felt
anything but disgust and fear over that knowledge, but the truth was she didn’t feel any of that. She actually felt this calm settle over her at the fact David had loved her so much he wanted to make sure she was safe. Had he always been like that? Did he follow other people? Had the incident with Brian changed him so much? “God,” she whispered and scrubbed her hand over her face. Her cell went off, and she picked it up, seeing it was Gerald. She’d spoken to him only once in the last couple of days, mainly because she’d wanted to make sure he was okay after David attacked him. His nose had been broken, which
she’d assumed given the hit he’d taken, but he said he was fine, and hadn’t spoken about David or that night during their phone call. In fact he’d wanted to see her again, but she’d declined because she had too much going on right now to go down that road. She couldn’t be with Gerald, not in any way. Their one date had been the catalyst to everything to come, and until she sorted shit out with David—with she desperately wanted to—she would keep declining. Hell, it was safer for Gerald anyway, and she didn’t want anything more with him. It wasn’t fair to him to leave him hanging when she knew what she wanted and what she didn’t want. For a moment she thought about
ignoring the call, but on the fourth ring she answered. “Hello?” “Gillian, hey,” Gerald said in a smooth voice. “How are you?” “I’m fine. Your nose is still doing okay?” She felt so much guilt that she’d essentially been the cause of his issue, even if she knew David hitting him had nothing to do with her. “It’s fine. I’m fine.” A beat of silence passed. “You shouldn’t feel bad about it. It wasn’t your fault some psycho came out of nowhere and attacked me.” She bit her inner cheek, thinking about David and his admission to why he’d done what he’d done. Would she
feel the things she was if he hadn’t followed her? What if he’d just showed up because he thought she was in trouble, like what he’d done with Brian? Did this whole situation seem so fucked up because he told her he knew where she was at all times? “Listen,” he said, and breathed out as if tired. “I’d like to see you. I don’t want what happened to make things weird. I really like you.” “Gerald—” “Don’t say no. I want to see you,” he said harder this time, and she exhaled. He was persistent, had been even before getting hit by David. “No really isn’t the best time, not with everything going on.” There was a
bit of silence, and she felt bad. Had she upset him? Surely he could understand and respect what she wanted? “Is this because of what happened with that asshole?” She closed her eyes. “Gerald, I don’t want to talk about that—” “Are you in love with him or something, screwing him on the side?” She snapped her eyes open, taken back by this aggressive demeanor from him. “What the hell, Gerald?” He’d been pushy a few other times when she’d been in his presence, but this was ridiculous. “What I do and don’t do is none of your business.” She tried to sound calm, polite even, but she was done with this conversation. Her guilt over him getting
hurt faded as her annoyance rose. Because of everything that had gone down, she wasn’t in the mood for anything but to sulk in her own thoughts and emotions. “Shit,” Gerald said, and a second of silence moved by. “Sorry, I guess this is all new to me, too.” New to him? “I’m not sure what that means, but I just need to be alone right now and get my head on straight. I hope you understand.” “No problem.” His voice had gone a little harder, like maybe he was annoyed, or hurt? She didn’t have the energy to care about this situation at the moment. She’d done everything to try to
keep this polite, but the way he was acting was very off-putting. “I’ll talk to you soon.” And then he hung up. She pulled the phone away and looked down at it. Ever since she met Gerald at the art show she’d felt this offness about it. But he’d been nice, had showed her attention, and she knew that she needed to get a life and go out and enjoy herself. Hell, she could use the stereotypical “he’s just an artist” excuse as to Gerald’s eccentric attitude, but the way he acted now kind of made her feel like he might be an all around asshole deep down. You’re just in a shitty spot right now mentally that you’re looking too hard into things.
Resting back on the couch, she set her phone beside her and stared at the wall. She loved David so much, and even after she found out what he did her feelings couldn’t be changed. Maybe she needed to talk to him about this, to really know why he’d done what he’d done, even though he’d given her a vague explanation. She did all but run out of there, and hadn’t given him a chance to talk. “Ugh,” she said and rubbed her face with her hands, not knowing what in the hell to do. **** David was fucking pissed at himself. He was the one that screwed this all up, and these last few days had
been absolute hell. He hadn’t tried contacting Gillian because he wanted her to have time to gather her thoughts. He also wanted to have a chance to come up with what in the hell he was going to do about this. David couldn’t let her walk away, couldn’t have her out of his life. She was everything to him, his entire world, and he needed to make this right. But where do I even start? He sat at the table, a full, sealed bottle of alcohol in front of him. He’d contemplated drinking the whole damn thing the night she walked out, but he hadn’t touched a drop, and wanted to have a clear head as he tried to work this out. Pushing the bottle away, he
leaned back in the chair and exhaled, wanting to pick up the phone and call the only woman he’d ever truly loved. Maybe he was a fucking coward for how things had played out, and for what he was doing now, but he was scared shitless to lose Gillian. Doing nothing will definitely have her out of your life. Try to win her back, you fucker. Feeling resolve, and knowing he’d have to change a part of himself in order to make Gillian trust him again, he knew he had to see her, to make her realize that he’d be whatever he needed to be in order to keep her in his life. Because a world without her in it was pretty fucking bleak.
Chapter Fourteen Gillian juggled the groceries in her hand, and tried to get the house keys from her purse. After just sitting on the couch and stewing in her own annoyance, she decided getting out, even if for just grocery shopping, would at least help clear her head. It hadn’t. Setting the bags down when she got to the front door, she started digging through her purse, and cursing when she couldn’t find her keys. But the sound of someone pulling into her driveway had her turning around. A sigh left her when she saw it was Gerald. He cut the engine and just stared at her through the
windshield for a second before finally getting out. “I know, I should have called,” he said, and she didn’t mention that he did call, and she’d asked for space. For a moment neither spoke or moved, but then Gerald started messing with his keys in his hand, the jingling sound breaking up the silence, but also grating on her nerves a little. Going to the grocery store hadn’t cleared her head, and in fact she felt even more stressed out over it all. She was tired, sick of the crying, the pain in her chest, and wished things could go back to the way they were—well, not the sex part. She’d enjoyed that, felt something powerful during it. What happened afterward was
what sucked. “I’m not feeling the greatest, Gerald. I think I just want to lie down. Maybe we can talk later?” Please, let’s just postpone this until things aren’t so fucked up. Gerald came closer. “Can I at least help you in with the bags?” Her first reaction was to tell him no thanks, that she had it, but she did feel a little bad that she was being like this. He might be pushy, but it wasn’t his fault shit had gone down the way it had. “Sure. Thank you.” She turned and unlocked the door, grabbed a bag, and looked back at Gerald. She caught him checking her ass out since she was partially bent over. It was kind of a dick
move, given what she’d expressed about her emotions, and the situation Gerald knew about, but she brushed it aside and pushed the door open more fully. Once inside she stepped to the side and allowed Gerald to move past her. “Where would you like it?” he asked about the bag he carried. “You can just put it on the table, thanks.” Once the bags were on the table she smiled, hoping he’d just leave so she could be alone. “Have dinner with me tonight, or a drink, or hell, just talk.” She exhaled, her head starting to pound. “Thank you for the offer, but I really don’t feel well, Gerald. I mean
when we spoke I thought I mentioned that.” “You shouldn’t be alone. You’re obviously going through shit.” He stepped closer to her, and she shook her head, not sure why he was being so insistent. “I want to be alone. I need to be alone. It doesn’t have anything to do with you, Gerald, and I’m sorry if I’m being rude about the whole thing.” He moved closer, but his expression still looked stoic, as if he wasn’t really hearing her. “I want to be there for you.” She shook her head. “I don’t want that right now. I can’t be that for you either, Gerald. I’m in love with
someone, and I’m going through a lot because of all of it. I can’t be what you want.” He knitted his brows and shook his head. “I have never had to try to have fucking dinner or a drink with a woman before you. I swear to hell you make things so damn difficult.” It was her turn to knit her brows. “Gerald, please, I think it’s time for you to go—” Before she knew what he was doing he was right in front of her. She took a step back, but the wall stopped her. “What are you doing?” Gillian was getting increasingly nervous in this situation, for obvious reasons. “I’m tired of working so fucking hard to get you to do a simple damn thing
with me.” “So, what, your feelings are hurt?” The look on his face had her closing her mouth so she didn’t say anything else. Probably not smart to say shit like that. He grabbed her around the waist and pulled her against him. She placed her hands on his chest and pushed, but he was stronger than she was. She opened her mouth to tell him to leave her alone, hell, to fuck off, but he shushed her and shook his head. The look in his eyes had everything in her stilling. Her fear rose up even harder in her. With his body pressed to hers,
keeping her immobile, she felt helpless. The past rose up, and for a second she felt frozen. Gillian remembered her time with Brian, his body pressed to hers, his grimy hands on her, holding her down, making her feel weak. But she also felt angry. She was not about to let a guy manhandle her. She was not going to be a victim again. “You’re so pretty. Why the hell do you have to play hard to get? Why can’t you just take a guy up on his offer?” He leaned forward and inhaled deeply right by her ear. “I shouldn’t have to try so hard to get a damn woman into my bed. I’m a renowned and famous artist. Women line up for a chance to be in my bed, for a second of my fucking
attention.” He started working his mouth down her throat, and sucked at the base of her neck, his closeness and the sound of wetness from his mouth about to make her gag. “Get the hell off me, Gerald.” She tried to wedge her hands between their bodies further and push him away, but the awkward position, and the fact he used all his body weight to keep her pinned to the wall made it nearly impossible. “I don’t know what it is about you that makes me need you so badly. Hell, maybe it’s the fact I haven’t had you yet that makes me a fiend.” He ran his tongue up her throat and kissed the side of her mouth. She struggled against
his hold, her eyes squeezed shut as she tried to stay in the present and not get sucked into the past, where she was helpless. “I won’t do this again,” she whispered. He chuckled softly. “Won’t do what?” he murdered right beside her mouth. She opened her eyes and focused. “I won’t be a victim. She turned and looked at him then, smiled, and in that one second she felt his hold loosen just an inch. That was all she needed. Bringing her knee up, she brought it right between his legs. Gerald’s eyes widened and he grunted out. Stumbling back, he held his crotch, his eyes watering.
“You fucking bitch,” he wheezed out, and she curled her hands into fists at her sides as she watched him. But his expression changed to something darker, and he charged forward. She made a sound of surprise and moved away from the wall, not wanting to get pinned again. The door was only feet from her, and she darted toward it. She needed to get out in the open. She had her hand wrapped around the handle, but before she could turn it and pull the door open Gerald grabbed her ponytail and jerked her back. She gasped out in pain from the sudden movement, and fell back on her ass. Her foot kicked the side table by the door, knocking over the lamp. It
didn’t break, so she desperately grabbed for it. She had the neck in her hand, her fingers wrapped tightly around it. Just as he was pulling her up to stand she swung back and clocked him in the side of the head with the ceramic lamp base. It broke, the sound of it shattering and crashing into his skull loud in the small space. Gerald stumbled back, blood immediately starting to pool down his temple. “Fuck,” he said and lifted his hand to touch the side of his head. “You fucking cunt.” His voice was raised, his rage tangible. Just as he took a step toward her the front door was pushed open. And there, standing in the entryway looking
pissed as fuck, was David. Gillian’s heart slammed hard against her ribs as she looked at the man she loved. He only took a second to take in the scene before he was letting out this deep, angry sound and charging toward Gerald. She was frozen against the wall, her focus on Gerald and David as they were in an active fight. The lighting was dim because the lamp had broken and the kitchen light was muted and around the corner, but she could see the beating David was giving to Gerald. It was like the scene before her was in slow motion, the violence filling the air, the rage coming from David so thick she felt it cover her skin. Gerald was now on his back on the ground
while David stood over him, his hands at his sides, and blood on his knuckles from hitting Gerald so many times. The expression on David’s face was a mask of dark anger. She’d seen that look before … she’d seen it when David went after Brian, and also when he’d first hit Gerald for kissing her. This was the real man she was in love with, the man that would do anything to make sure she was protected. It was in that second that she realized that the “fault” she’d seen in what he’d done, in the fact he’d been following her, was his way of making sure she was protected. It may not have been the best way to go about it, but it was the only way he knew. Gerald groaned and held the side
of his face, blood coming out everywhere, and smeared along his cheeks, even his forehead. And then Gerald tried to get up. “No, you stay down, fucker.” David punched Gerald in the side of the head, having the other man fall back onto the ground, groaning and still clutching his face. She knew her eyes were wide, felt her heart beating so hard it was painful. David leaned down so he was right over Gerald. “I should fucking kill you, you piece of shit,” David said, his voice sounding distorted. He started punching Gerald in the face repeatedly, the other man now begging for David to stop. “David,” she managed to say,
and he stopped instantly. David turned and looked at her, not saying anything, but breathing hard, his eyes still appearing wild. “He’s not worth it. Just let him go.” She knew if this didn’t stop David would kill him. He looked that unhinged. David gave her one last long look before turning and facing Gerald again. “Get your sorry fucking ass up.” Gerald complied right away, but not without groans. “If you so much as breathe in Gillian’s direction I’ll hunt you down and slit your throat.” David took a menacing step toward Gerald, and the other man took one back. “I’ll fucking kill you and bury the body so no one will ever find you.” David took
another step toward him. “Now, get the fuck out of here, and don’t you even think about looking at Gillian on your way out.” Gerald hauled ass out of there, kept his head low, and didn’t even look at her. David turned and faced Gillian, and slowly she watched the anger melt away. “I’m sorry,” he said, his voice deep, low. All she could do was stand there, emotions coursing through her body, her hands shaking from the aftermath. He’d come to her rescue again, saved her from God knew what, and she didn’t know what to say. Gillian should have felt fear
consuming her, just like it had all those years ago. But right now she didn’t feel that paralysis. She only felt the love she had for David, and she didn’t want him to leave. “Are you okay, sweetheart?” he asked and moved a step toward her, but stopped, as if worried she might reject him, maybe? He was looking her over, but it wasn’t heated or sexual. He was making sure she was okay. “I’m okay,” she whispered, and before she knew what she was doing she threw herself in his arms, needing his strength and love. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and all she could feel was that ever-present warmth in her, the need to just forget about anything and
everything that didn’t have to do with them. “I could have killed him for touching you, Gillian. I could have broken every bone in his body.” “You just about did,” she whispered, shaken up, but thankful David was here. “I wanted to do so much more, baby.” He lifted his hand, about to touch her cheek, but curled his fingers into his palm and stopped touching her. “Thank you for being here. You’re always saving me, David.” He uncurled his hand and finally did touch her cheek then. “You never have to thank me.” He smoothed his thumb along her cheek, wiping away the
tear she hadn’t even known she’d shed. No matter what had happened between them, she loved David, knew he’d always be there for her, and they needed to work this out. Gillian couldn’t have a life without David in it. **** He sat across from Gillian at her kitchen table, wanting to say a hell of a lot, but wanting to hold her, comfort her even more. It had been hours since all that shit with Gerald had gone down, and although he was pretty fucking sure that asshole would never show his face around her again, not if he wanted to live, David wouldn’t leave her alone. What she didn’t know, might
never know, was how much power she actually held over him. He was a territorial and possessive bastard when it came to Gillian, but for her he’d fall to his knees and worship the ground she walked on. For her he’d kill without even a second thought. “I can leave if you want?” he asked, more for her benefit than an actual guarantee he would. He wanted her to have the space she needed, but he was a protective fucker concerning her. Thank fuck she shook her head. “I don’t want that. Even after everything that just happened, I want to talk about everything.” He knew what she meant. “You want to talk about the fact I
followed you for this whole time.” She nodded and looked down at her hands. “I think I now understand why you did what you did, even if it wasn’t right.” “It wasn’t right, Gillian.” She looked up at him after he spoke. It may have been pretty insane, but David didn’t regret what he’d done. “But I can’t say I’d change any of it.” She didn’t change her expression, so he pressed on. “After Brian attacked you something changed in me. I became obsessed with the fact I needed you safe, and it was that obsession that had my love for you growing, had this possessive side rising up so strongly I couldn’t stop it. I didn’t want to.” He
saw her throat work as she swallowed. “In my head, me following you was going to ensure you were safe, and that another Brian asshole wouldn’t hurt you.” He reached out and took her hand, hoping she didn’t shy away. His heart beat faster when she let him touch her. “I won’t lie and say what you did wasn’t wrong, David.” He nodded. He couldn’t deny that. “And you should have been honest with me.” Again, he couldn’t deny that. “I should have. You’re the most important person to me, and not having you in my life isn’t an option.” She wanted honesty? Well, he gave it to her. “I can’t
walk away from you. You’re mine, and I’ll always look after you.” The silence stretched on, and he didn’t know where this conversation or situation was going. “What are you thinking? I want you to be honest.” It took her a second before she answered. “I know one thing,” she said and looked at him in the eyes. “I know I love you, and I want you in my life. I know no matter what, you’ve always had my best interest at heart.” He gave her hand a squeeze. “You’re my number one.” She squeezed his hand back. “But no more lies, David. No more sneaking around. If we do this we do it as a team, and out in the open. No
hiding.” “Come here, baby.” He gave her hand a tug until she was off the seat and over by him. He pulled her onto his lap and just held her. “I’ll always be rough around the edges, but you’re right.” He pulled back and looked at her. “I love you, and I’ll try anything to make you happy.” She smiled and rested her head on his shoulder again. He didn’t know what in the fuck would happen from this point on, but right now he had the woman he was madly in love with by his side, and he wasn’t about to fuck that up again.
Epilogue One year later Fate had a funny way of making things work out when someone least expected it. That was what happened with Gillian when she fell in love with David. She never thought she’d have him in her life in the way she desperately wanted. But here she was, going to spend the rest of her life with him. He’d been such an integral part of her world for so long that she didn’t know what she’d do without him. Even after all the shit that had happened last year, Gillian’s heart had always belonged to David. How things had played out may
not have been “right”, but that didn’t mean she could just walk away and ignore what she felt. They’d had to work through it, probably still were subconsciously, but she trusted him, and he trusted her. Over the last year it had taken a lot for David to pull back from his possessive and overprotective ways. Although Gillian did love that he had that side, there were times it was too much, and they’d had to work through it. His worry for her safety stemmed from the Brian incident, and she knew that feeling in him would probably never go away. They just had to work through it as a couple. She heard the shower shut off and lifted her head up from the book she
was reading. It was getting late, but David had just gotten off work, and she wanted to spend a little time with him before they went to bed. Although she still had her place, she spent most of her time at David’s. But his apartment was threadbare, and they were talking about getting a place together, a house that they could call their own. The door finally opened, and steam billowed out before the light was turned off and David stepped out. He had a towel wrapped around his waist, and another one covering his head as he dried his hair. She set the book on the coffee table, got off the couch, and walked toward him, feeling especially aroused all of a sudden.
Her nipples hardened, her pussy became wet, and she felt her entire body heat with arousal. His chest was a work of art. With bulging muscles, a six-pack that was so defined she could have probably bounced a coin off of it, and that delicious V of muscle that dipped down to disappear beneath his towel, all of it made Gillian feel like a woman in all senses of the word. But just as she was about to reach out and touch him, David tossed the towel aside, grabbed her around the waist, and pinned her against the wall. He pressed his lower half against her belly, and the feel of his erection had a soft sound escaping her. “You’re insatiable,” he said
against her neck, and started running his tongue along her flesh. “Only with you.” He let out this low growl and thrust his cock against her again. “That’s how it better be.” She grinned even if he couldn’t see her. “You were going to sneak up on me, baby?” His mouth was still by her throat, the vibrations seeping into her body. “Maybe,” she said and grinned wider. “Hmmm,” he hummed and pulled back, looking at her mouth. In the next second he had her in his arms, was striding down the hallway, and went into
the bedroom. He shut the door, set her on the bed, and tore the towel off. She looked down at his huge cock and felt her pussy muscles clench. “Come here,” she whispered. He was on the bed and had his body pressed to hers in the next second. Gillian tightened her fingers in David’s hair. He gave one last deep groan before removing her clothing and covering her left nipple with his hot, wet mouth and sucking long and hard. The blood rushed to the surface and swelled under his ministrations. For several agonizingly pleasure-filled seconds all he did was suck on her breasts. He alternated between them, drawing the tissue out with his teeth, and then
dragging his tongue over the slight sting he caused. It felt so incredibly good, and she wanted it to last forever, but also for him to advance in what they were doing. Gillian was vaguely aware of the sounds coming from her, ones that should have made her embarrassed, but she didn’t care, not with how David made her feel. He slid his palm down her belly, pushed her legs apart even further, and covered her pussy with his big hand. At the first touch of his fingers on her slick cleft, Gillian cried out. “Tell me how it feels.” “So good, David.” “Yeah, it really fucking does feel good, baby.” He continued to stroke her slowly. He slipped a thick finger into her
pussy and started pushing it in and pulling it back out slowly. “And it’s all for me, baby. You’re wet and primed, and ready for my cock … only my dick, baby.” He murmured against her chest at the same time he pressed his thumb to her clit and started working the bundle of nerves back and forth. She nodded. “Only for you, David.” His name fell from her lips like a plea, like she was begging for more. And she supposed she was. All she wanted was David to have his cock inside of her, making her feel good, and having him tell her how much he loved her. She wanted him desperately. Gillian let go of his hair and moved her hands between their bodies.
David let out a hoarse growl when she lifted her pussy to his mouth even more. He moved up her body and grabbed her ass. “You smell so fucking good.” She wrapped her legs around his waist, rubbing her pussy on him. He hissed out a curse and ran his tongue up the column of her throat. “I could lick at you all damn day.” He pulled away from her neck and took her mouth in a hungry kiss for long, drugging seconds. Taking hold of chunks of his hair in her hands, she pressed his mouth to hers and kissed him like her life depended on it. Their tongues pressed to one another, and when he retreated she followed into his mouth. It was strange taking control, and in all honesty she
wasn’t sure if she liked it, because David was dominating in the best of ways. “I don’t think I can last if we don’t move this along.” He chuckled after she spoke and moved his lips down to her collarbones, dragging them across the arches. He placed his hands on her knees and opened her thighs even wider than before. Closer and closer he smoothed his hands down her inner thighs until he came to the area of her body that ached the most for him. Pushing herself up, she looked down her body and watched David. Her limbs felt loose, her body relaxed, yet poised at the precipice of reaching that
pinnacle. David lifted his gaze to her, and she held her breath at the intensity in his gaze. A high claimed her, and she sucked in a big breath. He lowered his head to her pussy, never once taking his gaze off of her. And at the first lick of his tongue on the most intimate part of her, Gillian held her breath and waited for David to give her the pleasure that only he could bring out in her. **** Hell yeah. Her pussy was tight and so damn hot. But it wasn’t this sensation that had him feeling this euphoria. It was the fact Gillian was here with him, that she was his.
He moved his mouth so it was an inch from her sweet smelling pussy. His cock jerked at the sight. With his mouth so close to the most intimate part of her, David couldn’t have torn his focus from the sight if his life was on the line. “Fucking hell, Gillian,” he murmured out the words. He lifted his gaze to her face for a moment, saw her watching him intently, and while holding her gaze stuck his tongue out and ran it up the center of her cunt. She gasped, her mouth open, her eyes glossy. At the first taste of her his control broke. He licked her cunt, sucked at her pussy lips, and then he ran his tongue up her cleft and sucked on her clit. She was pink and hot, and glistening
from her arousal for him. How in the hell did a motherfucker like him get so damn lucky? Latching his mouth over the engorged bud, David sucked on her like a starving man. Hell, he was starving, but only for her. No matter how much he had her, how many times he fucked her, claimed her, David was always hungry for Gillian. She tasted so good, so fresh that he grew frenzied for more. “You taste so fucking good, baby girl.” He licked her so many times he couldn’t feel his tongue, but he liked that fact, because he knew it was good for her. She moaned, thrashed, and clenched her hands on the sheets. He didn’t stop,
couldn’t. She made these needy little sounds, ones that drove him absolutely fucking crazy with lust. He framed her pussy while he ate her out. David pulled her cunt lips apart with his lips, letting him see the pink, wet flesh of her. While holding her open he lifted his gaze to her face. Her eyes were closed, her lips parted, and her chest moved up and down from her increased breathing. He went back to licking and sucking at her cunt, wanting her to get off. “You taste so damn good. I won’t ever get enough.” As he ran his tongue up and down her slit, she became wetter for him, more primed. “I’m so close,” she gasped out
those words, sounding like she had a hard time speaking. “I want you to get off, baby. I need you to come while I have my face all up in your sweet pussy cream.” She moaned after he spoke, and he started sucking furiously on her clit again. It didn’t take long before he felt her body start to tighten with her impending orgasm. Holding her thighs open, he pulled back an inch and pushed two fingers into her pussy. He was slow at first, trying not to be too rough, but he wanted her to lose control for him. A cry of ecstasy finally left her. “That’s so fucking it.” She lifted her hips and ground her cunt against his face, and he went
back to sucking on her clit. The wet, slurping noises of his mouth between her legs had his cock throbbing. David started pressing his hips into the mattress, trying to alleviate the pressure by dry humping the hell out of the bed. His balls were going to explode if he didn’t get his cock inside of her. “Oh. God. Yes.” She moaned loud and long, and that was his breaking point. He took his fingers from her, licked them clean, and cupped her ass with both of his hands. Her asshole was right there for the taking, and he didn’t hold off any longer. He licked at the puckered hole of her bottom with just the tip of his tongue, allowing her to grow
used to what he was doing, hoping she’d come from this alone. “David, yes,” she hissed out the words. Gillian started panting again, and he used more force, licking her hard then sucking on her flesh. Her skin tasted clean, like soap and lemons. With one more lick up the crease of her bottom, he pulled away. He kept her legs spread open with his hands on her inner thighs, and stared down at her pussy. “This is mine,” he said and cupped her cunt. Her chest rose and fell from her post-orgasmic euphoria, and it had the alpha male in him grinning. It was because of him that she looked like that, felt this pleasure. He was so damn hard,
so fucking ready to have her in all ways. When he rose and positioned himself above her, the feel of her wet pussy slipped along his length, and he groaned. She reached between them, lifted slightly up, and positioned the tip of his dick at her entrance. God, this woman could bring him to his knees and he’d gladly worship her. He gritted his teeth when her fingers tightened around his dick, and David had to force himself not to thrust into her. Their eyes locked, and he started to push back into her, loving how she parted her lips and gasped. A deep groan left him, and her breath hitched, her eyes widening. “Am I stretching you good,
baby?” She nodded and licked her lips. “You’re stretching me so good, David.” He gave one last thrust, feeling her muscles tightening around his cock until it felt strangled. When he was fully inside of her he slipped his hands under her ass, curled his fingers around the flesh, and in one move rolled onto his back and had her straddling him. She had her legs spread wide on either side of him, her hands on his chest, and her mouth was still parted. “Ride me, baby.” She started moving, working herself on him. David moved his hands to her hips and clenched at the flesh, trying to let her set the pace. Her
movements started off slow, but she soon picked up speed. “That’s it.” Her breath hitched when she rose up and then slid all the way down on him. Over and over she did this, gradually going faster with each passing second. For a moment he lost his control and found himself thrusting up, pushing himself deep and hard inside of her. “Oh, David.” David couldn’t stop himself when she said those words. In a quick move, he had her on her back again, needing to be the one in control. He speared his hands in her hair, tugging at the strands and having her head back, her throat arched.
“Yes,” she moaned. Leaning down and running his teeth up her neck, he loved that a shiver worked through her. She had her legs wrapped around his waist, and her hands clenched at his biceps. “Lift those hips, baby. Give it to me.” She lifted her hips, grinding herself on him. He was still inside of her tight, wet heat, and it was fucking heaven. Even after a year of being with her it was always like the first time every time. It was mind-blowing, exhilarating, and so fucking good. Placing his hands on either side of her head, he started moving inside of her fast and hard, not about to prolong
this, He felt sweat trickle down his hairline. He was a greedy bastard when it came to Gillian, and he knew that would never change. He let his gaze travel to her mouth, and continued to follow the path down her body to her breasts, over her belly, and stopped at the top of her pussy. She had a thatch of hair covering her pussy, and he could see her clit. It was slightly engorged from her arousal, and his mouth watered. With his cock lodged in Gillian’s pussy, David couldn’t be still for much longer. He started fucking her good and thoroughly, making sure she only felt pleasure. Their sweat-slicked stomachs touched, and he pulled out and thrust
back in harder than before. “Yes,” she whispered the words. “You stretch me so good.” A groan left him when her tight body clenched around him. He moved faster and harder in and out of her, unable to control himself. Her pussy tightened around him, and he clenched his teeth. His balls drew up tight with his impending orgasm. David was going to come, and he was going to fill her up with it. He was going to make her so full of it the spunk would slip out of her pussy and make the bed wet. He wouldn’t last long, and the amount of control he was using now should have won him an award. She dug her nails into his skin harder, and he
hissed out, loving the pain and pleasure that followed. “That’s it, Gillian baby.” Lifting up just enough that his arms were locked straight and his chest no longer touched hers, David looked down at where their bodies were connected. “Yes,” she hissed the word out. “Harder and faster, David.” She arched her back, and her breasts rose up from the motion. David’s gaze was trained on the sight of her nipples hardening even further. He was going to give her what she asked for. He sat back on his knees, encircled her waist with his hands, digging his fingers into her pliant, soft
flesh, and fucked her. The sloppy, wet sounds of his cock moving in and out her cunt was an auditory orgasm all its own. He bottomed out of her every time he pushed back inside. “I’m going to come again.” The way she gasped had his pleasure mounting. Knowing he was pleasuring his woman made him feel good in more than just a sexual way. The sensations were allconsuming pleasure and had his orgasm washing through him. Her pussy muscles milked his dick, tightening and relaxing so that he couldn’t hold off from coming anymore. “Fuck. It’s so good.” He jerked against her as he came, emptying himself
inside her willing body. The fact he was filling her with his seed, claiming her and saturating her with the most intimate part of him, had his arousal going so fucking high he couldn’t rein it in. “Fuck.” He didn’t censor his words. He continued to thrust into her shallowly, seeing the pleasure on her face. David didn’t want this to end, didn’t want to pull out of her sweet, wet, and warm pussy. “I’ll never let you go, baby. I’ll never let anyone else have you.” She stared up at him with wide, pleasure-filled eyes. “God. Yes, David.” Everything about Gillian made him hard, needy, and possessive. He cupped the side of her face. “You’re
mine.” She nodded. She didn’t hesitate when she said, “I’m yours, and I’m not going anywhere, David. I chose to be yours, and I will always be yours.” Leaning over her he first ran the tip of his nose up the length of her throat, inhaling deeply and taking her delicious aroma into his body. She smelled sweet and clean, and he wished he could mark her, like some kind of animal. “Christ, baby.” This was what it meant to want a woman so badly it ate away at everything else. He knew that it would always be this way with her. Always. He ran his teeth over her flesh, a
harsh groan leaving him, his pleasure sated for the time being. When both of them were sated her gave her neck one last lick and pulled out of her. He kissed her on the forehead, pulled back, and just stared at her for a prolonged second. Fuck, he was so damn lucky to have her. He smoothed his hands over the indentation of her spine, along the curve of her ass, and loved that her flesh puckered. Gillian was his— every part of her was only his. He didn’t deny himself when it came to her. He leaned forward and started running his tongue over the small of her back, loving that she moaned slightly. He wanted to memorize every inch of her, have her know his touch from others. She was
pliant beside him, not fighting his urge to taste all of her. “How does that feel, baby?” he murmured against her skin. “So good,” she whispered, her voice thick with sleep. Over and over he licked and sucked at her, his cock hard again, but his need was about making Gillian feel good, and not about what he wanted sexually. “Turn over for me.” She complied, and once her breasts were right there for the taking, he leaned down and sucked on her nipples for long seconds. Her sweet moans made him feel like a man, a real man that could please his woman. Finally forcing
himself to continue memorizing her body with his mouth, he trailed his mouth up her throat and licked a path over her pulse point. “You’re mine, Gillian,” he said, his voice husky, determined. “I’m only yours,” was her response. He pulled away and looked down at her again, so fucking in love with this woman. David gathered her into his arms, and after a few moments he heard her breathing change. He knew she would be asleep within a matter of minutes, and a part of him loved the fact he’d brought this exhaustion out in her because he’d worn her out in only the best of ways.
He’d never thought he’d have Gillian as his, especially not after he’d told her the truth. But in the grand scheme of things it hadn’t been the end of the world. He was willing to risk anything, even his life if it ever came down to that, to make sure Gillian was safe and happy. He didn’t deny he had his own issues that others might see as over the top and even wrong, but none of that mattered. Being together and what she felt were the only things that mattered. “I love you, Gillian,” he whispered, sensing her falling deeper in sleep, but feeling his gut tighten when she curled into him even more. “I love you, too.” He’d never be that man that
didn’t worry about her, that didn’t need to know where she was because it would give him peace of mind. But she accepted that, accepted him, and that made him the luckiest bastard in the world. The End
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