FUTURE CITY FUTURE CITY edited by ROGER ELWOOD TRIDENT PRESS • NEW YORK ¾IDRGES P. VANIER LIBRARY, LOYOLA COLLEGE, MONTRE11 1 0 8 592 MAY 2 B 1974 Cop...
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FUTURE CITY
FUTURE CITY e d i t e d by
ROGER ELWOOD
TRIDENT PRESS • NEW YORK
¾IDRGES P. VANIER LIBRARY, LOYOLA COLLEGE, MONTRE11
1 0 8 592 MAY 2 B 1974 C o p y r ig h t (i
1973 h y R o g e r E lw o o d
All rights r e s e r v e d iiu l u d in g t h e right o f r e p r o d u c t i o n in w h o l e o r in part in a n y form P u b l i s h e d by Tr id en t Press A d iv is io n o f S i m o n & S c h u s t e r , Inc. R o c k e f e l l e r C e n t e r , 630 Fifth A v e n u e N e w York, N e w York 10020 First p r in tin g SBN 671-27103-2 Library o f C o n g r e s s C a t a l o g Card N u m b e r : 72-96814 D e s i g n e d by Eve M e t z M a n u f a c t u r e d in t h e U n it e d S ta te s o f A m e r ic a
T h e stor y “ H in d s ig h t : 4 8 0 S e c o n d s " c o p y r i g h t © 1973 by Harlan Ellison.
CONTENTS Pr ef ace/Roger Elwood Forewor d/ Cl if for d D. S¡mak In Praise of N e w York/Tom Disch T he S i ghts ee rs /Be n Bova M e a n w h i l e , W e E li mina t e / Andr ew j. O ff ut t T hi n e Ala ba st e r Cities G l e a m / L a u r e n c e M. Janifer C u l t u r e Lock/Barry N. M a l z b e r g T he W o r l d As Will a n d Wa ll pa pe r/ R. A. Lafferty Violation/William F. No la n City Lights, City N¡ghts/K. M. O ' D o n n e l l T he U n de r c i t y / D e a n R. K o o n t z A p a r t m e n t H un t i n g / H a r v e y a n d A ud r e y Bilker As a Dr o p/ D. M. Price Abe nd l ä n d e s / Vi r g¡ n ¡ a Kidd T he W e a r i e s t River/Thomas N. Scortia De a th of a City/Frank FHerbert Assassi ns of A i r /G eo r ge Z e b r o w s k i G et t i n g A c r o ss / Ro b er t Sil ver ber g In Dar k Places/Joe L. H e n s l e y Re vo lu ti on /Ro bi n S c ha ef f er C h i c a g o / T h o m a s F. M o n t e l e o n e T he M o s t Primitive/Ray Russell H in ds i g ht : 480 S e c o n d s / H a r l a n Ellison 5,000,000 A.D. /Mi riam Allen d e F o r d A ft e rw or d /F r ed e r¡ k Pohl
7 10 14 15 18 29 34 41 57 63 81 96 106 107 108 149 159 169 203 214 219 236 238 245 252
ROGER E L W O O D
P reface ROGER ELW OOD
Ideally, an a n t h o l o g y s h o u l d n o t b e a l o o s e c o m p e n d i u m of s tori es t h a t b e a r little o r n o relation t o o n e a n o t h e r . In t h e days of i n n o c e n c e , b o o k s t h a t w e r e a n t h o l o g i e s c o u l d ge t away with s o rt of a p o t p o u r r i d e s i gn b e c a u s e r e a d e r s w e r e f a sc ina te d by t h e f o r m a t itself a n d t h e multiplicity of a u t h o r s r e p r e s e n t e d therein. But s u c h t i m e s a re g o n e ; s c i e n c e fiction r e a d e r s a re b e c o m i n g m o r e a n d m o r e a s t u t e ; m u c h m o r e t h a n si mpl y " f o r m a t " is d e m a n d e d — t h e r e m u s t b e quality as well as a raison d 'ê tre for t h e b o o k itself. Future C ity m e e t s b o t h t h e s e d e m a n d s , I b e lieve. Its quality will b e c o m e a p p a r e n t as y o u s a m p l e t h e c o n t e n t s . Its r e a s o n for b e i n g is c o m m e n t a r y o n t h e f u t u r e of t h a t o v e r w h e l m i n g entity, t h e city. T h e city in its m a s s i v e n e s s , its intricate p r o b l e ms , its c o n c e n t r a t i o n of p o w e r a n d r e s o u r c e s is i n d e e d o v e r w h e l m i n g , a n d s e l d o m in an a w e - in s p ir i ng s e n s e , e it he r. It o v e r w h e lm s t h e e ye s a n d t h e n o s e with n o i s e p ol l u ti o n , air p o l lu ti on a n d G o d k n o w s w h a t e ls e; it f os t e rs d e e p - s e a t e d a nx ie tie s of e v er y d e s c r i p t i o n ; a n d it h a r b o r s s u c h a n a s s o r t m e n t o f c r i m e s a n d acts of v i o l e n c e as t o m a k e t h e m i n d recoil in o u t r a g e a n d fear. S o m e s oc io lo gi s ts h av e c o m p a r e d cities t o d i n o s a u r s , certain t o b e e d g e d o u t o f e x i s t e n c e by t h e f or c es of e vo l u t i on a ry c h a n g e ; cities ha ve far o ut li ve d t h e i r u s e f u l n e s s , t h e r e f o r e t h e y a re d o o m e d t o e xt inct ion. Be t h at as it may, t h e r e ar e n o c o n c r e t e a n s w e r s as t o w h a t
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PREFACE
exactly will h a p p e n . If t h e cities o n this p l a n e t are d o o m e d , t h e n h o w will t h e y expi re? An d w h a t will e v e nt u al ly es c al at e t h e p r o c e s s of d e ca y, d is r u p t i o n a n d d is so l ut io n? The a u t h o r s of t h e s t or ie s a n d p o e m s h e r e i n have t ri ed to p r o v i d e p o s s i b l e a n s w e r s t o q u e s t i o n s a b o u t t h e f u t u r e of t h e city. But it s h o u l d b e s t r e s s e d t hat, like c h a p t e r s in a novel, it may b e i m p o s s i b l e t o r ead o n e o r m o r e o u t of c o nt e x t . This is o n e a n t h o l o g y t ha t m u s t b e t a k en q u i te as a w h o l e . For e x a m p l e : T h e t o n e of "I n Praise of N e w Yo rk " by Tom Disch s e e m s d e c e pt i v e ly light a n d opt imi sti c. But r e ad o n to " T h e S i g h t s e e r s " by Ben Bova, t h e n " M e a n w h i l e , W e Eliminate" by A n d r e w J. Offut t, t h e n " T h i n e Ala ba st e r Cities G l e a m " by L au r en c e M. Janifer a n d y ou will s e e a g r ad ua l p r o c e s s of di si n t e g r a t i o n ; t h e r e f o r e , D i s c h ' s p o e m — if r e a d w i t h c a r e a n d i n si ght— is n o t really opt i mi st ic at all, for it b e g i n s t h a t p r o c e s s , t ha t inevi tabl e p r o g r e s s i o n a l o n g to s u c h s tor ie s as " D e a t h of a City" by Frank H e r b e r t , "As sas si ns of Air" by G e o r g e Z e b r o w sk¡ a n d " T h e M o s t Primitive" by Ray Russell, until you c o m e t o "5,000,000 A . D. " by Miriam Allen d e F o r d w h i c h — b u t t h e n t ha t is u p t o you t o find out. In my o p i n i o n , t h e r e a r e a n u m b e r of stories h e r e i n t ha t qualify as a wa r d w i n n e r s or, at t h e very least, t r e n d s ett er s . I d o u b t t ha t s c i e n c e fiction has o f t e n h a d a s t or y as o u t s p o k e n as Barry N. M a l z b e r g ' s " C u l t u r e Lock, " a c o n d e m n a t o r y t r e a t m e n t of h o m o s e x u a l i t y ; o r t h a t R o b e r t Silver ber g has e v e r d o n e really b e t t e r t h a n his " G e t t i n g A c r o s s " n o v e l e t t e ; o r t ha t T h o m a s N. Scortia will s o o n t o p " T h e W e a r i e s t River," a tour d e - f o r c e t r e a t m e n t o f s a d o m a s o c h ¡ s m , g o r g o n ism a n d o t h e r notf o r - S u n da y -s c ho o l - p i c n i c mat ter s. "I n Dar k Pl aces" by Joe L. H e n sl e y hardly pulls a n y p u n c h e s in its d e p i c t i o n of b la ck /wh ite r el a t i on s hi ps ; a n d Harlan Ellison s h o w s a soft, t e n d e r s id e of his t a l e n t with " H i n d s i g h t : 480 S e c o n d s " ; a n d I have n ot f o u n d it eas y t o f o r g et " T h e W o r l d As Will a n d W a l l p a p e r " b y R. A. Lafferty, " V io l a t i o n " by William F. Nol an, " A p a r t m e n t H u n t i n g " by Harvey a n d A u d r e y Bilker, " T h e U n d e r c i t y " by D e a n R. Koont z, " R e v o l u t i o n " by Robin 8
ROGER E L W O O D
Schaef fer , "City Lights, City N i g h t s " by K. M. O ' D o n n e l l a n d " C h i c a g o " by T h o m a s F. M o n t e l e o n e . T h e n , of c o u r s e , t h e r e a r e t w o e x a m p l e s of n o n fic tio n writ ing by t w o s c i e n c e fic tio n p r o s — Clifford D. Si ma k' s I n t r o d u c t i o n a n d Frederi k Pohl' s A f t er w o r d, b o t h intel ligent , p e r c e p t i v e a n d i n v al uabl e t o this a n t h o l o g y . Add t o t h e s e t h e p o e m s by D. M. Price a n d Virginia Kidd e n t i t le d , r especti vel y, "As a D r o p " a n d " A b e n d l a n d e s , " a n d you h a ve , I f eel, a d i ve r se a n d s t i mu l a t ing a n t h o l o g y . All t h e material c o n t a i n e d in Future C ity is original a n d was w r it te n especial ly f o r t h i s b o o k . All t h e s tor ie s h a v e b e e n c h o s e n with c ar e a n d p u t in m o r e o r less c h r o n o l o g i c a l o r d e r . But it is n o t a h a p p y b o o k . An d it may b e t o o s t r o n g for s o m e r e ad e rs . Yet it is a b o o k t h a t m a k e s — t h r o u g h t h e c o ll e ct e d t a le nt s of m o r e t h a n t w e n t y a u t h o r s — a p o w e r f u l over-all s t a t e m e n t o n t h e t er ri bl e i n a d e q u a c i e s a n d c o r r u p t i v e a t m o s p h e r e of a g re at m a n y cities. ( S o m e a u t h o r s w o u l d say all cities.) All of us h o p e y ou find t h e c o n t e n t s of this b o o k w o r t h w h i l e a n d m e a n i ng f u l . W e h av e tr ied, as b e s t w e can, t o give you an a n t h o l o g y t h a t is c r e a te d r at he r t h a n p a c k a g e d . R
M argate N e w Jersey
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El w
o od
FOREWORD
Forew ord CLIFFORD D. SIMAK
Th e city at o n e t i m e s e r v e d a p u r p o s e . It d e v e l o p e d o u t of t h e e v o l u t i o n of o u r civilization a n d for m a n y c e n t u r i e s s e r ve d m a n k i n d well. It first w a s c o n c e i v e d in t h e Neoli thi c Revol ut ion w h e n m e n f o u n d it w a s t o t h e i r a d v a n t a g e t o f o r g o t h e i r n o m a d i c w a n d e r i n g s a n d se tt le in o n e place. T h e f o r m at io n of t h e c o m m u n i t i e s t h a t w e r e t h e p r o t o t y p e s of cities a n d s o m e of w h i c h later b e c a m e w h a t w e t h in k of as a city m a d e p os s i bl e t h e division of l a bo r a n d t h e d e v e l o p m e n t of speci al izati on in c e rt ai n crafts a n d p r o f e s s i o n s , a t t r a ct e d t r a d e , m a d e g o v e r n m e n t f eas ibl e a n d gave religion an o p e r a t i n g b a s e. A city gave t h e p e o p l e w h o d w e l l e d wi thi n it a s e n s e of unity s t r o n g e r t h a n t h e tribal unity t h e y pre vi ou sl y h a d k n o w n , p r o v i d i n g a real s e n s e of h o m e . O n c e it was fortified, it b e c a m e a place of c o m p a r a t i v e safety, w h i c h w as n o t easily c o m e by in t h o s e days. T he fortifications w e r e a ne ce ss it y, for o n c e a city ha d g r o w n rich, it b e c a m e a pr ize for raiding o u t l a n d b a n d s a n d a d d e d t o w a r a n e w d i m e n s i o n — profit. T h e r e w as a t i m e w h e n t h e city was m o r e i m p o r t a n t t h a n t h e state, w h e n it o f t e n was t h e state. T h e p e o p l e w h o lived wi thin its walls w e r e citizens of t h e city r a t h er t h a n t h e state. T he first p atr iot is m d is pl ay e d by m e n b e l o n g e d t o a city r a t h er t h a n a state. T o da y t h e r e ha s t o b e s o m e r e a s o n a b l e d o u b t t h at a city a n y l o n g e r s er ve s a w o r t h w h i l e f u n c ti o n. So l o n g as travel was s l ow a n d c o m m u n i c a t i o n s w e r e n o t o nl y s lo w b u t u nr el i a bl e, t h e city h a d a f u n c t i o n t o p e r f o r m . T h e r e wa s a da y w h e n a m a n t o t r a n s a c t b u s i n e s s wi th a n o t h e r m a n h a d t o g o d o w n 10
CLIFFORD D. SIMAK
t h e s t r e et t o s e e him o r s e n d off a m e s s e n g e r with a letter. Toda y b u s i n e s s c an b e t r a n s a c t e d wi th a l m o s t a n y o n e in t h e w or l d by simply lifting a p h o n e o r e m p l o y i n g a n y o t h e r of t h e m e a n s of a l m o s t i n s t a n t a n e o u s c o m m u n i c a t i o n available to us. C o m m e r c e t o d a y is o n a national o r an i n te rn at io na l basis, n o l o n g e r me re ly b e t w e e n o n e city a n d a n o t h e r . Bus ines s t r a n s a ct i o n s n o l o n g e r call for t o g e t h e r n e s s . Travel a n d t r a n s p o r t a tion n o l o n g e r ar e local ma tt er s. T h e r e is n o l o n g e r a ny n e e d of t h e p r o t e c t i o n t h a t w a s o n c e f u r n i s h e d by t h e city. The d a n g e r to h u m a n life a n d p r o p e r t y n o w lies wit hi n t h e city, n o t o u t s i d e of it. A n d , u nl i ke t h e days of t h e city-state, a city n o l o n g e r is n e e d e d for t h e f u n c t i o n of a g o v e r n m e n t . Th e city t o d a y lives o n as an a n a c h r o n i s m p r o p p e d u p by tr adi tion. At g r e at c o s t w e r eb u i ld t h e cent ral c o r e of a city a n d w h e n w e a r e f i n i sh ed wit h it w e find t ha t w e have a glittering b u s i n e s s district s u r r o u n d e d by rings of g h e t t o s . W e jam o u r h ig h w a y s e a c h m o r n i n g a n d again e a c h e v e n i n g with a u t o m o b i l e s car rying w o r k e r s w h o l o n g s i nc e h av e fled t h e city b e c a u s e it has b e c o m e an i n to l er a bl e pl ace in w h i c h to live. All t h e cities in e x i s t e n c e h av e g r o w n by a c c i d e n t s of history. T he y h ave d e v e l o p e d w i t h o u t plan, si mpl y r e s p o n d i n g t o t h e u n c o n tro lle d d e m a n d s m ad e u p o n th e m , b e n d in g to the s t r e s s es of t h e m o m e n t . H e ro i c efforts h av e b e e n m a d e to k e e p t h e m alive a n d h a b i t a b l e , b u t t h e s e efforts have b e e n of a p a t c h w o r k n a t u r e as e x p e d i e n c e d e m a n d e d . T he y r e s e m ble, in t he ir o r ga n i c s t r u c t u r e , n o t h i n g q u i t e so m u c h as a c a n c e r o u s g r o w t h . U rb a n d e c a y has e a t e n i nto t h e m a n d w h a t w as in o n e g e n e r a t i o n a s t r e e t o f p r o u d h o m e s b e c o m e s a g h e t t o in t h e next. T he city t o d a y is s tr angli ng a n d suf fo c at i n g a n d t h e r e d o e s n o t s e e m t h a t m u c h c an b e d o n e with it. Exper iment al cities, n e w cities d e s i g n e d for living, h av e b e e n t a lk ed a b o u t . Ideally, s u c h a city w o u l d b e self-sufficient, with all m a t t e r re cy cl ed again a n d again. T h e r e w o u l d b e n o slums, f or t h e r e w o u l d b e e m p l o y m e n t a n d e q u a l o p p o r t u n i t y for 11
FOREWORD
e v e r y o n e ; p o ll ut i o n w o u l d b e c o n t r o l l e d , partially by t h e r ecy cling p r o c e s s ; t h e r e w o u l d b e n o u r b a n d e c ay , for t h e city w o u l d b e d e s i g n e d for o n ly so m a n y p e o p l e a n d s o m u c h p r o d u c t i o n a n d w h e n e i t h e r of t h e s e e x c e e d e d t h e limit a n e w city w o u l d b e s t a r te d . S uc h a city, say its a d v o c a t e s , w o u l d n o t b e d e s i g n e d as a n o r g a n i s m , b u t as a m a c h i n e . For s u c h a city t o w o r k t h e r e w o u l d h a v e t o b e c o n t r o l s — u p o n its p o p u l a t i o n a n d p r o d u c t i o n — m o r e s t r i n g e n t c o n t r o l s t h a n a n y o n e in o u r n a ti on k n o w s t o d a y. T h e r e w o u l d b e n o r o o m for industrial o r b u s i n e s s e x p a n s ion a n d p e r h a p s little for p e r s o n a l initiative, for t h e city w o u l d b e a c l o s e d sy st em. But w h y save t h e city at all? If it has out l iv ed its u s e f u l n e s s , if it n o l o n g e r s e r v es t h e f u n c t i o n s for w h i c h it was d e s i g n e d , w h y s p e n d m o n e y o n it? T h e da y ma y c o m e , s o o n e r t h a n w e t hi nk , w h e n b u s i n e s s a n d i nd us tr y, as well as p e o p l e , will have fled t h e city. T h e w a y has b e e n p o i n t e d by t h e drift t o s u b u r b a n c o m m u n i t i e s in t h e last forty year s. A n d, i n d e e d , t h e a b a n d o n m e n t of t h e city by a n u m b e r of b u s i n e s s firms a n d i n d u s tr i es a lr ea d y has t a k e n pl ace. M a n y small b u s i n e s s firms h av e sh if t ed f r o m t he ir city l oc at ions , e i t h e r t o s u b u r b a n s h o p p i n g c e n t e r s o r t o n e w l oc a ti ons . T he larger retail e s t a b l i s h m e n t s t ha t still mai nt ai n t h e i r s t o r e s d o w n t o w n h av e b r a n c h e s in t h e s h o p p i n g c e n t e r s . Ftosp¡tals a r e built o u t s i d e t h e city; m o r e a n d m o r e office b u i l d i ngs a re a p p e a r i n g b e y o n d t h e city limits. T o da y a m a n sitting in his h o m e , in an office e q u i p p e d with all t h e c o m m u n i c a t i o n facilities wi thin o u r capability, c o u l d t r a n sa c t his d u t i e s as well as a n d p e r h a p s m o r e efficiently t h a n h e c o u l d f r o m an office in t h e city. It w o u l d s e e m t o m a k e little s e n s e for t h o u s a n d s o f p e o p l e t o travel miles t h r o u g h heavy traffic t o sit d o w n at d e s k s in an office a n d t h e r e carry o u t t h e d u t i e s t h a t t h e y m i g h t d o as well st aying at h o m e . If w e e v e r have t h e s e n s e t o realize this, we'll b e d o i n g a n u m b e r of t h i n g s — m a k i n g large office s p a c e in t h e c ent r al city no l o n g e r n e c e ss a r y , t a k i ng a g r e at deal of t h e p r e s s u r e off o u r hi gh wa y s y s t e m s a n d m o r e t h a n likely c u t t i n g d o w n t h e i n c i d e n c e of h e a r t attack. 12
CLIFFORD D. SIMAK
S c i e n ce fiction wr it er s , t h r o u g h t h e year s, have b e e n fasci n a t e d by t h e p r o b l e m s t ha t a city p o s e s . T h ey h ave d r e a m e d m a n y kinds of cities— s o m e ideal ized, s o m e p o rt r a y i n g by logi cal e xt r ap o l a t io n t h e stifling h o r r o r t h a t c an exist wi t hi n t h e m . I a m c e r t a i n t h a t in r e a d i n g t h e s t o r i e s s e l e c t e d f o r t h i s a n t h o l o g y y ou 'l l f i nd s o m e r a t h e r s t a r t l i n g c o n c e p t s of t h e f u t u r e city— if t h e r e is t o b e a f u t u r e city.
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IN PRAISE O F N E W Y O R K
In Praise of N ew York TOM DISCH
As w e ri s e a b o v e it r o w a f t e r r o w O f l ig h ts r e v e a l t h e i n c r e d i b l e s i z e O f ou r loss. An id ea l c o m m o n w e a l th W o u ld b e n o t oth erw ise, For w e ca n n o m o r e l e g i s l a t e A gainst th e ca u ses o f u n h a p p in ess, S u c h as d e a t h o r i m p o t e n c e o r t i m e s W h en n o o n e n otices, Than w e c a n a b o l i s h t h e s e c o n d l a w O f th e rm o d y n a m ic s, w h ic h states T hat all e n e r g y , w i t h o u t e x c e p t i o n , is w a s t e d . Still, u n d e r c e r ta i n c o n d i t i o n s It is p o s s i b l e t o m o v e To a s l i g h t l y n i c e r N e i g h b o r h o o d . O r if n o t , T h e n a t l e a s t t h e r e is u s u a l l y s o m e o n e To talk t o , o r a library T ha t s t a y s o p e n till n in e . A n d a n y n i g h t y o u can s e e T im e s S q u a r e T r e m u l o u s w i th its b u s l o a d s O f t o u r i s ts w h o a re s e e i n g all o f this For t h e first a n d la s t t i m e B e f o r e t h e y are f l o w n B ack t o t h e r e p u b l i c o f A z e r b a i d z h a n O n t h e s h o r e o f t h e C a s p ia n , W h e r e fo r w e e k s t h e y will d r e a m o f o u r fa c e s D r e n c h e d w i th an u n b e l i e v a b l e light.
14
BEN B O V A
T he Sightseers BEN BOVA
My h e a r t a l m o st w e n t into fibrillation w h e n I s a w t h e b r o w n c l o u d off o n t h e h o r i z o n t h a t m a r k e d N e w York City. Dad s mi le d his w i s e r - t h a n - t h o u smi le as I p r e s s e d my n o s e a ga ins t t h e p l a n e ' s w i n d o w in an effort to s e e m o r e . By t h e t i m e w e g ot o u t of t h e stack o v e r LaGuard¡a Air por t a n d actually l a n d e d , my n e c k hur t. T h e city's fantastic! P e o p l e w e r e c r o w d i n g all o v e r, selling t h i ng s , b uyi ng, h ur r yi ng a c r o ss t h e s tr e et s, g aw ki ng . An d t h e n oi s e , t h e smell s, all t h o s e old g a s o l i n e - b u r n i n g taxis rattling a r o u n d a n d bl as ti ng h o r ns . Not like Sylvan Dell, Michi gan! "It' s va ca ti on t i m e , " Da d t o ld m e as w e s h o u l d e r e d o u r way t h r o u g h t h e c r o w d s a l o n g Br oadway. "It' s always c r o w d e d d u r ing vacati on t i m e . " A nd t h e girls! T h e y l o o k e d b a c k at y o u , right st raight at y o u , a n d s mi le d. Th ey k n e w w h a t it was all a b o u t , a n d t h e y liked it! You c o u l d tell, just t h e w ay t h e y l o o k e d b ac k at y o u . I g u e s s t h e y really w e r e n ' t a ny pr et t i er t h a n t h e girls at h o m e , but they dressed . . . wow! "Dad, what's a bed¡cab?" He t h o u g h t it o v e r for a m i n u t e as o n e of t h e m , l on g a n d low, with t h e b a c k w i n d o w s c u r t a i n e d , e d g e d t h r o u g h traffic right in f r o nt of t h e c u r b w h e r e w e w e r e s t a n d i ng . " Yo u c an p r o b a b l y f ig u r e it o u t for y o u r s e l f , " h e said u n c o m f ortably. " T h e y ' r e n o t ver y s an i ta ry ." O k a y , I'm just a kid f r o m t h e n o r t h w o o d s . It t o o k m e a c o u p l e o f m i n u t e s . In fact, it w a s n ' t until w e c r o s s e d t h e s t r e et 15
THE SIGHTSEERS
in f r o nt of o n e — s t o p p e d for a r ed light— a n d I s a w t h e girl's p i c t u r e s e t u p o n t h e w i n d s h i e l d , t h a t I r eali zed w h a t it was all a b o u t . S u r e e n o u g h , t h e r e was a m e t e r b e s i d e t h e driver. But t h a t ' s just o n e of t h e t h i n g s a b o u t t h e city. T h e r e w e r e old m o vi e h o u s e s w h e r e w e s a w real m u r d e r films. Blood a n d b e a t i n g s a n d l ow- cu t b l o n d e s . I t h i n k Da d w a t c h e d m e m o r e t h a n t h e s c r e e n . He claims h e t h i n k s I'm old e n o u g h t o b e t r e a t e d like a m a n , b u t h e acts awfully s c a r e d a b o u t it. W e h a d d i n n e r in s o m e really c r u m m y place, d o w n in a cellar u n d e r a n o ld hot el . Wi th live p e o p l e t a ki ng o u r o r d e r s a n d b r i n gi n g t h e f o o d ! "It' s s a n it a ry , " Dad said, l a ug h i n g w h e n I h e s i t a t e d a b o u t d i gg i ng i nt o it. "I t' s all b e e n i n s p e c t e d a n d a p p r o v e d . The y d i d n ' t p u t t h e i r f e e t in it." Well, it d i d n ' t h u r t m e . It w as p re tt y g o o d , I g u e s s . . . t o o spicy, t h o u g h . W e s t a y e d t h r e e days a l t o g e t h e r . I m a n a g e d t o m e e t a c o u p l e o f girls f r o m Ma r yl an d at t h e hot el w h e r e w e s tayed. They w e r e okay, p r o p e r l y d r e s s e d a n d giggly a n d always w h i s p e r i n g to e a c h o t h e r . T h e N e w York girls w e r e just o u t of my l e a g ue , I g u e s s. D a d w as p re t ty careful a b o u t k e e p i n g m e away f r om t h e m . . . o r t h e m a wa y f r o m m e . He m a d e s u r e I w a s in t h e h o t el r o o m e ve ry night , right af ter d i n n e r . T h e r e w e r e p le nt y of really h o r ri b l e ol d m o v ie s t o w a t c h o n t h e cl o se d- c ir cu i t TV; I s t a y ed u p past m i d n i g h t e a c h night. O n c e I was just drifting off t o s l e e p w h e n Dad c a m e in a n d f l o p p e d o n his b e d with all his c l o t h e s o n . By t h e t i m e I w o k e u p in t h e m o r n i n g , t h o u g h , h e w as in his p a j a ma s a n d s o u n d a s l ee p . Finally w e h a d t o go. W e r e n t e d a sanitary car a n d d e c o n t a m i n a t e d o u r s e l v e s o n t h e w ay o u t to t h e a ir por t. I d i d n ' t like t h e l un g -c l e a n s i n g m a c h i n e . You h a d t o w o r k a t u b e d o w n o n e of y o u r nostrils. " I t ' s j u s t as i m p o r t a n t as b r u s h i n g y o u r t e e t h , " D a d said firmly. If I d i d n ' t d o it for myself, h e w as g o i n g t o d o it for m e . "You w o u l d n ' t w a n t t o b r i n g billions of b a c t er i a a n d viruses b a ck h o m e , w o u l d y o u ? " h e a s k e d . 16
BEN B O V A
O u r p l a n e t o o k off an h o u r a n d a half late. T h e ho li da y traffic was heavy. “ D a d , is N e w York o p e n e v er y y ea r . . . just like it is n o w ? " He n o d d e d . "Yes, all d u r i n g t h e va ca ti o n m o n t h s . A lot of t h e p u b l i c h ea lt h d o c t o r s t h i n k it's ver y risky t o k e e p a city o p e n for m o r e t h a n t w o w e e k s o u t of t h e y e ar , b u t t h e t ou r i s t i n du st r y has f o u g h t t o k e e p N e w York g o i n g all s u m m e r . They s h u t it d o w n right af ter Labor Day. " As t h e p l a n e circled t h e b r o w n c l o u d t h a t h u m p e d o v e r t h e city, I m a d e u p my m i n d t h a t I'd c o m e b a ck again next s u m m e r . A lo ne , m a y b e . Th a t' d b e great! My last g l i m p s e of t h e city was t h e big sign p a i n t e d a cr oss w h a t u s e d t o b e t h e Bronx: N E W Y O R K IS A S U M M E R FESTIVAL O F F U N !
17
M E A N W H I L E , W E ELI MINATE
M eanwhile, W e Eliminate ANDREW J. OFFUTT “ y e s , t h e r e are i n d e e d t o o m a n y m e n in t h e w o r l d . In e a rlie r d a y s it w a s n ' t s o n o t i c e a b l e . B u t n o w t h a t e v e r y o n e w a n t s air t o b r e a t h e , a n d a car t o d r i v e a s w e ll , o n e d o e s n o t i c e it. O f c o u r s e , w h a t w e are d o i n g i s n ' t ration al. It's c h i l d i s h n e s s , j u s t a s w a r is c h i l d i s h n e s s o n a g i g a n t i c s c a l e . In t i m e , m a n k i n d will learn t o k e e p its n u m b e r s in c h e c k b y r a tio n a l m e a n s . M e a n w h i l e . . . w e e l i m i n a t e . " — H erm ann H esse , S t e p p e n w o lf
Fred Lap¡dus s t a r e d in s h o c k as t h e big ca r p a s s e d him easily o n t h e left. Everyone el se was w a t c h i n g t o o , h e saw, by t h e posi t i on of t h e i r h e a d s . It w as h a r d t o tell w h e r e p e o p l e w e r e l o o k i ng w h e n e v e r y o n e w o r e o n e - w a y gl asses, b u t y ou l e a r n e d t o g a u g e by t h e w ay t h e i r h e a d s w e r e t u r n e d , o r by t h e i r e y e b r o w s w h e n t h e y w e r e n ' t w e a r i n g t h e n e w e r Supr-PrivT goggl es -t yp e affairs t h a t c o v e r e d b r o w s a n d m o s t of t h e n o s e as well. The car th a t p a s s e d him w as an a n c i e n t a u t o m o b i l e , a g a s o l i n e - e n g i n e d i n o s a u r , right h e r e in t h e city! Noisy, r oaring a n d g r o w l in g ( a l t h ou g h h e c o u l d n ' t h e a r it) a n d c a p a b l e of s p e e d s of u p t o a h u n d r e d miles an h o u r o r so. M a y b e m o r e . A r oa d car. A c o u n t r y car! M o v i n g u n c o n c e r n e d l y a l o n g a m o n g t h e a l m o s t silent mini ks a n d maxis. As if its o w n e r o w n e d t h e d a m n e d s tr ee t , as if h e h a d a right t o p u t o u t all t h a t p o i s o n ! Fred Lap¡dus c h e c k e d t h e p o l lu t io n g a u g e o n t h e i n s t r u m e n t p a n el b e f o r e him. He w as a m a z e d t h a t its n e e d l e did n o t j u m p all t h e way a c r os s t h e g a u g e . It d id mo v e . It m o v e d c on s t a n tl y , of c o u r s e , b u t h e wa s s u r e t h e n e e d l e ' s little q u i v e r u p t h e scale w as c a u s e d by t h e m o n s t e r . T h e s on of a bitch! 18
A N D R E W J. O F F U T T
W h y d i d n ' t h e drive o n , g e t away f r om h e r e , s t o p trying to kill p o o r Fred Lapidus in t h e electri c min¡k, all t h e o t h e r Fred La pi dus es in th e ir t o w n c a r s , all t h e p e o p l e c r o w d e d t o g e t h e r in t h e big d o u b l e - d e c k e r electric m a x i b u s e s ? Cer t ai nl y h e had t h e h o r s e p o w e r . T h e s o n of a bitch! W h e r e t h e hell w e r e t h e police? T he minik in f r o nt of Fred s w u n g off t h e f r ee wa y, an g l in g down the ramp onto th e approach to Market and the West End. T h e minik in f r ont of t h a t o n e s w u n g into t h e c e n t e r lane, a n d Fred i n c r e a s e d his s p e e d a l m o s t t o m a x i m u m . Racing a l o n g at thirty miles an h o u r , h e w a t c h e d t h e b a c k e n d of t h e maxi a h e a d r ush t o w a r d him. T h e n h e h a d t o jam o n his b r a k e s . Cu rs i ng . Eyes b ulging. T he g a s ol in e d i n o s a u r w h i p p e d into his line, directly in f r o nt of hi m. G o d , t h e s p e e d a n d p i c k u p of t h a t t hing! But h o w t h e devil was t h e dr ive r abl e t o h a n d l e it? It w as so h u g e . Five o r six p a s s e n g e r s , Fred r e m e m b e r e d , a n d right u p t o a h u n d r e d miles an h o u r o n t h e I nter st ates . His f a t h er h a d ha d o n e . Fred h a d e v e n r i d d e n in it, b u t h e c o u l d n ' t r e m e m b e r , n o t really. His f a t h e r h a d m o v e d i nt o Louisville w h e n Fred was s e v e n , l o o k i n g for b e t t e r w o r k t h a n t h e farm d o m i n a t e d by t h e w e a t h e r , for b e t t e r h o u s i n g t h a n t h e r a m s h a c k l e f a r m h o u s e o n a h u n d r e d a n d sixty-eight ac re s, f or b e t t e r living c o n d i t i o n s t h a n d i r e c t e x p o s u r e t o c o u n t l e s s i ns ec t s a n d all t h e o t h e r h o r rors o f f ar m life. Fred s h i v e r e d , g l anc in g a b o u t f o r a w a y t o g e t o u t f ro m b e h i n d t h e old a u t o m o b i l e . He c o u l d n ' t . Be hi nd him a n d o n e it he r s i d e o f h i m w e r e s o l i d l i n e s of m i n ¡ k s a n d m a xi s , m o v i n g t h o u s a n d s a n d t h o u s a n d s of p e r s o n s h o m e f r o m w o r k o r t o w o r k f r om h o m e ; t o this place o r t hat. M i ng l ed a m o n g t h e m w e r e t h e b l u e a n d w h i t e of city p ol ic e v eh ic le s, a r m e d a n d a r m o r e d , a n d t h e s ¡ l ve r y- b r o w n - a n d - g r e e n vehicl es, t an k l ik e affairs with w i n d s h i e l d s t h a t c o u l d b e c l o s e d just like a h o u s e ' s w i n d o w s : Feps. An d h e r e w as h e , Fred Lapidus, $16,000 a y ear a n d in t h e 53 p e r c e n t tax b r a c k e t , by G o d , a n d d a m n e d p r o u d of it— s t u c k b e h i n d a p o i s o n - b r e a t h i n g d r a g o n f r o m t h e past! 19
M E A N W H I L E , W E ELIMINATE
It w as f r o m o u t of t o w n , of c o u r s e . S u c h m o n s t e r s w e r e illegal in cities. T h e y w e r e p o i s o n . He k n e w his ec oh¡ st or y. S o m e t i m e in t h e sixties— h e w a s n ' t s u r e a b o u t t h e y e a r — f o u r t e e n t h o u s a n d t o n s o f g u c k h a d b e e n a d d e d t o t h e air a b o v e m e g a t h e r i a n Los A n g e l e s e ve r y day. It w a s n ' t e n o u g h t h a t t h e city was a c e s s p o o l , b u t e v e n its air h a d b e c o m e a g a r b a g e d u m p . A n d o v e r 87 p e r c e n t of t h a t g u c k c a m e f r o m just s u c h a m o n s t e r as t h e o n e b e ll o w i n g a l o n g s o u n c o n c e r n e d l y right in f r o nt of Fred Lapidus. Right h e r e in t h e city \ O n e of Fred's c h i l d h o o d m e m o r i e s was t h e arrival of t h e family in Louisville. H o w s t r a n g e t h a t d a r k sky h a d l o o k e d ; h o w h e h a d s t a r e d a n d w o n d e r e d . ( Yo u d i d n ' t s t u d y “ p h o t o c h e m i c a l s m o g " in t h e first gr ade .) “ D a d d y , " h e ' d a s k e d , " W h a t ' s that? W h y ' s t h e air s o d a r k ?" " Th a t' s civilization, s o n , " his f a t h e r t ol d h im , n o t w i t h o u t pr id e. " Th a t ' s Ah mu r r ¡c a. That c o m e s f r o m t h e factor ies w h e r e D a d d y ' s g o i n g t o w o r k a n d m a k e g o o d m o n e y a n d have a nice h o u s e wi t h n e i g h b o r s a n d i c e - cr ea m m e n a n d e v e r y t h i n g . " " Th a t' s w h a t killed t h e c r o p s , " M o m said. But it h a d n ' t b e e n fact ori es. T h e f actor i es w e r e d o i n g th ei r p a rt in p o i s o n i n g t h e air of c o u r s e , b u t t h e i r speci al ty was rivers. T h e b r o a d o ld river t h a t f l ow e d d o w n p a s t Louisville, c o m i n g f r o m u p n o r t h , p a s t Ci nci nnat i, w h e r e t h e r e w e r e signs in pu bli c rest r o o m s : P LE A S E F L U S H . L O U I S V I L L E N E E D S T H E w a t e r . It h a d b e e n t h e a u t o m o b i l e s , cars j us t like t h e o n e t h e y w e r e riding in. But t h e y h a d n ' t k n o w n it t h e n . An d t h e n o u t of t h e m i d d a y d a r k n e s s h a d l o o m e d t h e b ui ldi ngs ! Their f e e t v a n i s h e d into t h e i r closel y c r o w d e d n e i g h b o r s a n d t h e i r s p e a r i n g s u m m i t s v a n i s h e d into t h e d a r k n e s s a b o v e . But— buil di ngs! A City. An d little Fred Lapidus h a d f o r g o t t e n all a b o u t d a r k n e s s at n o o n , a n d t h e t h o u g h t d i d n ' t o c c u r t o hi m in t h o s e t e r m s until h e wa s t w e n t y y e a rs o l d a n d h ad t o r e ad A r t h u r Koest ler for a c o u r s e , j us t b e f o r e t h e y c l o s e d t h e c ol leges. Hel pl essl y fo l lo win g t h e ol d a u t o m o b i l e , a relic f r om t h e days of t h e t r i u m p h a n t d o m i n a t i o n of t h e c o u n t r y by w h a t Lewis M u m f o r d h a d call ed D e tr o it 's infantile fantasies, Fred 20
A N D R E W J. O F F U T T
t r i ed t o r e m e m b e r . Let's s e e , t h a t t h i n g w a s s p e w i n g o u t lead, a n d w h o h a d n ' t h e a r d of lead p o i s o n i n g ? A n d an a s s o r t m e n t of o rg a ni c c o m p o u n d s a n d n i t r o g e n o x i d e s , w h i c h w e r e t h e p r i m e s o u r c e s — with sunlit o x y g e n — of t h e s m o g of t h e old days. T h e n t h e r e w a s c a r b o n m o n o x i d e , a n d e v e r y o n e k n e w t h a t w as p o i s o n , a n d if yo u g o t t o t h e p o i n t w h e r e y ou really c o u l d n ' t t a k e it all a n y m o r e y o u c o u l d always g o i nt o t h e g a r a g e a n d let y o u r a u t o m o b i l e carry y o u off t o e t e r n i t y — w i t h o u t e v e n mov in g. Let's s e e , w a s t h a t all— O h , G o d , no! T h e r e w e r e sulfur o x i d e s , a n d t h e y w e r e really nice, h e r e o n t h e river. Th e y c o m b i n e d with w a t e r v a p o r t o f or m a lovely c o m p o u n d k n o w n fancily as H 2 S O 4 . Sulfuric acid. W h a t t h a t did t o nyl on s t oc ki ng s a n d t h e like w a s n o t h i n g c o m p a r e d with w h a t it ha d d o n e t o Fred Lapi dus' m o t h e r . H e b e g a n t o s we at . T he car a h e a d did h av e an a f t e r b u r n e r . But af ter all, w h a t h a d t h a t e v e r s ol ve d ? T h e r e h a d b e e n o n e o n t h e n e x t car his f a t h e r h a d b o u g h t , s e v e n y e ar s after arriving h e r e in t h e l and of milk a n d h o n e y . (That w as t h e y ea r t h e y w e r e a bl e t o m o v e o u t o f t h e W e s t End. Luckily; t h e n ex t y ea r it was p r o c l a i m e d s o v e r e i g n a n d s e pa ra t is t, right after t h e b l o o d b a t h . A p a r t o f t h e Black N ati on of Aframerika.) His f a t h e r h a d b e e n very p r o u d of t h a t n e w car. Its a f t e r b u r n e r e l i m i n a t e d t h e stuff t h a t e v e r y o n e c o u l d p r o n o u n c e by t h e n : t h e h o r r i b l e h y d r o c a r b o n s , w o r s t m e n a c e s i n c e C o m m u n i s m , Koestler's D arkness at N o o n . But, b o r n in California like s o m a n y o t h e r p e r n i c i o u s p l a g u e s wi th attractive e x t er i o r w r a p p i n g s , t h e a f t e r b u r n e r s d i d n ' t last long. T he car a h e a d of Fred Lapidus ha d a n a f t e r b u r n e r , so it w a s n ' t filling t h e air wi th h y d r o c a r b o n s , w h i c h killed slowly, bui l di ng a n d b u i l d i n g t o w a r d d o o m s d a y . No. It was s q ui r t in g o u t p o u n d af ter p o u n d of n i t r o g e n o x i de s i ns te a d. Th e y h a d always r e a c t e d with h y d r o c a r b o n s , a n d n o w t h e y w e r e l ib e ra t ed , a n d it d i d n ' t t a k e l o n g t o l ear n t h a t t h e y w e r e w o r s e . ( O r b e t t e r ; it was a m a t t e r of p e r s o n a l p r e f e r e n c e : W o u l d y o u r a t h e r di e quickly o r slowly?) T h e n i tr ox¡ de s w e r e n ' t as p a t i e n t as t h e h - c a r bo ns . 21
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They killed swiftly. Fred c o u l d well r e m e m b e r his c o ns t a n t l y b l e e d i n g n o s e , a n d t h e t h o u s a n d s a n d millions of o t h e r a l m os t p e r m a n e n t l y b l o o d y n o s e s , as m u c o u s m e m b r a n e s r e ac t e d in h e l p le s s a g o n y t o t h e ni tr oxi de s e m i t t e d by a f t e r b u r n e r - s a f e automobiles. Swe ati ng, biting his l o w e r lip, h e tr ied frantically to g e t into t h e left lane. N o t h i n g d o i ng . He s a w t h e o t h e r driver's m o u t h m o v i n g in v i t u p e r a t i o n (justified) b e f o r e h e o p a q u e d t h e w i n d o w o n t h a t s ide of his car. Fred s w e a t e d . He was t w o miles f ro m his exit. W h y w a s n ' t s o m e o n e d o in g s o m e t h i n g ? Tentatively h e rai sed a f in g e r t o his n o s e . P u s h e d carefully. L oo k e d at t h e finger. Si ghe d. No b l o o d . He tr ied h o l d i n g his b r e a t h , w i s h i n g h e ' d ha d his mini k's o xy ra t or c h e c k e d last Sat ur day. M a y b e h e was safe so long as he r e m a i n e d in his m¡nik with t h e o xy r a tor o n . H e r e a c h e d o v e r t o switch it o n Full, listening t o its w h i n e with a little f r own. W h y w e r e t h e local poli ce a n d t h e Feps letting t ha t g uy j ust drive a l o n g h e r e this way, right in t o w n , killing t h e m all? He g l a n c e d a r o u n d . W h e r e h a d t h e y g o n e ? T h e r e w a s n ' t a p ol ic e v eh ic le in sight. Funny, t h e r e h a d b e e n several just a m i n u t e ago. He m u s t have b e e n t h i n k i n g a b o u t s o m e t h i n g else a n d failed t o n o t i c e w h e n t h e y g u n n e d off. P ro ba bl y o v e r t o t h e W e s t Side again. So s o m e b o d y was g e t t i n g r i p p e d or r a p e d o r s o m e b o d y h a d g o t t e n p is s e d off a n d was s ni p i n g o r t o r c h i n g a b u il d in g o r t w o . Serve t h e m right, t h e s c u m . So w h a t t h e hell, this c r e a t u r e u p a h e a d was p o i s o n i n g th o u s a n d s ; h e was c o m p l a c e n t l y killing Fred L a p id u s, him a n d his s ti nking steel d i n o s a u r with its I nd i an a plates. M i gh t k n o w t h e b a st ar d w a s n ' t e v e n a Kent ucki an! S o m e b o d y did s o m e t h i n g . T he electric t o w n c a r s w e r e n ot l on g o n s p e e d o r p i c k u p , b u t t h e y w e r e s u p r e m e l y p a r k a b l e a n d m a n e u v e r a b l e . W h i c h w as all t h e y n e e d e d ; w h a t n e e d of m u t l i h o r s e p o w e r in cities, w h e n e ve ry v e hicl e was j a m m e d t o g e t h e r a n d c o u l d n ' t g e t a n y w h e r e a n yh ow ? But t h e m a n in f r o nt of a n d t o t h e left of t h e g a s o l i n e m o n s t e r s w u n g his e m i n e n t l y m a n e u v e r a b l e min¡k o v e r in f r o nt of t h e 22
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a u t o m o b i l e . T h e I ndi ana d ri ve r r e s p o n d e d w i th t h e usual r e a c tion t i m e , t w e n t y o r s o s e c o n d s t o ge t his f o o t f r om a c c e l e r a t o r t o b r a k e , a n d Fred j e r k e d his f o o t off t h e a c c e l e r a t o r as h e reali zed t h a t t h e m a c h i n e a h e a d h a d j ol t e d t o a s t op . Instantly his mi ni k r e s p o n d e d t o t h e d e c r e a s e d pe da l p r e s s u r e . Instantly it b r a k e d . Fred g a s p e d a n d c l a p p e d a h a n d o v e r his p o u n d i n g h e a r t as h e c a m e t o a s t o p a f e w f e e t f r o m t h e b a c k of t h e m o n s t e r . He c o u l d r ead t h e strip of ol d, b r o k e n c h r o m e n o w : PONT AC.
He sat sha ki ng . T h e d o o r of t h e o ld ca r s w u n g o p e n a n d a m a n s w u n g o u t. A big m a n w h o s e c l o t h e s d i d n ' t l oo k right; t h e y l o o k e d like c lo th e s , p e r m stuff, r a t h e r t h a n t h e city d w e l ler's usual u n i f o r m of d i s p o s a b l e s . H e s aw t h e m a n ' s b r o a d s h o u l d e r s a n d small b u t t m o v e f o r w a r d , a r o u n d his m a c h i n e to t h e o n e t ha t h a d p u l l e d in f r o n t of hi m. T h e n Fred s a w t h e o t h e r driver, also o u t o n t h e p a v e m e n t . Lord, h e w a s a garink! His suit s h o w e d t h a t clearly; it was o n e of t h e d i s p o s a bl es t h e g o v e r n m e n t h a n d e d o u t o n c e m o n t h l y t o e v e r y o n e o n t h e g u a r a n t e e d i n c o m e rolls. T he guy was a $7,5OO-a-year m a n , for G o d ' s sake! Fred c u t off his e n g i n e . Well, h e h a d s ta tus; his o w n paid-for j acsuit w o u l d s h o w t hat. H e ' d g o stick u p for t h e guy, a f ellow Lou¡sv¡llian, a n d wh il e h e w as at it h e ' d raise hell with t ha t o u t - o f - s t a t e hi ck in his p o i s o n - b r e a t h i n g m o n s t r o s i t y o f an illegal vehi cle! He u s e d left t h u m b a n d right h a n d t o u n l o c k t h e d o o r , t h e n p u s h e d it o p e n . A n d y a n k e d it s h u t , w i nc ing . T he n oi se ! H e ' d f o r g o t t e n , s e a l e d u p in t h e f o r t r es s k e e p of his car a n d in his f r i g h t e n e d fury. Q ui c kl y h e p o k e d in his e a r p l u g s , b u t h e d e c i d e d a ga ins t t h e r es pi ra t or . He g ot o u t of t h e car. Al r eady o t h e r s w e r e s t o p pi ng, t o o . G e t t i n g o ut . " — right o u t in f r o nt of m e t h a t w a y ! " t h e a u t o driver was s ayi ng loudly, a n d e v e n his a c c e n t w a s w r o n g . "I g o t t a b e in this lane, d a m m i t ! I t u r n off in t w o bl oc ks . If y o u ' d b e e n driving a d e c e n t car y o u ' d h a v e s t o p p e d a u t o m a t i cally. N o w just look w h a t yo u did t o my m i n i k ! " "I wish my f o o t ' d s l i p p e d off t h e b r a k e a n d g r o u n d y ou i nto 23
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m i n c e m e a t , y ou d a m n e d s ma r ta s s ! Drive t h a t c ar like s o m e kind of a kid, n o r e ga rd for a n y o n e el s e w h a t e v e r . " Bowling-alley t h u n d e r i n t e r r u p t e d ; a j et w e n t over . "I really t h i n k , " Fred Lapi dus said, s t e p p i n g u p to t h e m in his bl ack-and-s¡lver vylon suit, " t h a t y o u s h o u l d n ' t b e talking a b o u t r e g a rd f or o t h e r s . " Both m e n l o o k e d at him. So did t w o o r t h r e e o t h e r s w h o ' d g o t t e n o u t t o s e e w h a t w as t h e m a tt e r, a n d t o give t h e outo f- s ta te r a g o o d p i e c e o f m i nd . Fred p o i n t e d d is dai nf ull y at t h e a g e d Pontiac. " Yo u c o m e into t h e city in t h a t th i ng , j us t dri vi ng a l o n g p o i s o n i n g us all a n d o u r kids— " " Y e a h , " said a fat m a n in a s h a p e l e s s c h a r b r o w n jacsuit. O u r k i d s \ " He g l a n c e d a b o u t at t h e five or six o t h e r s w h o ' d s t o p p e d t h e i r cars t o join h im. " O u r kids. Look at t h a t t h i n g h e ' s driving! A r e gu l ar o l d p o i s o n factory. D o n ' t y ou k n o w t h e law a b o u t city cars, b u d d y ? " T he big m a n f r o m I nd ia n a l o o k e d a r o u n d , f r o w ni ng . "I wa s just— " " S c ar i n g t h e life o u t of all of u s , " Fred said, " n o t t o m e n tio n p ol l u ti n g o u r air a n d e n d a n g e r i n g t h e lives of o u r k id s !" T h e r e w as a d i s s o n a n t c h o r u s of a g r e e m e n t f ro m t h e e i g h t o r t e n o t h e r s g a t h e r e d a b o u t . T he I n di an an l o o k e d a r o u n d at t h e f aces, e y el e s s b e c a u s e o f t he ir o p a q u e gl asses. He w a s n ' t e v e n w e a r i n g any; d i d n ' t h e c a r e a b o u t privacy? "L oo k , I'm o n my w a y h o m e . I h a d t o c o m e in t o g e t a pa rt for this t h i n g , " t h e ou t - o f - st a t e r said quietly. " I ' m n o t cr azy a b o u t it myself. It's all I c a n afford. I d i d n ' t h av e t h e m o n e y t o r e n t a minik at t h e b r i d g e . " " S h i t , " said t h e m a n h e ' d hit f r om b e h i n d . "All y ou ha d t o d o was s h o w ' e m y o u r c ar d , Jack. You w o u l d n a h a d t o p a y . " " O u g h t t o c l os e t h a t d a m n e d b r i d g e , " s o m e o n e e ls e m u t t e r e d , " a n d seal us off f r o m t h e s e c l o w n s f r om t h e o t h e r s ide of t h e O h i o . " T h e big m a n s e e m e d t o g r o w taller. " C a r d ! " He sp a t o u t t h e w o r d . "I d o n ' t have a n y car d. I raise f o o d , mis te r, a n d 24
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sell it t o f e e d y o u city p e o p l e s o y o u d o n ' t starve. I m a d e o v e r f o u r t h o u s a n d last y ea r with my o w n h a n d s . But I b e d a m n e d if I'll a c c e p t a n y t h i n g f r om t h e g o v e r n m e n t . That ain't right!” G o d , Fred t h o u g h t , d o e s n 't th e M o n g o lo id id io t k n o w h e 's ta lk in g to a garink? T h e r e w e r e several o t h e r s , t o o , a m o n g t h e tw el ve o r t h i r t e e n m e n g a t h e r e d a r o u n d t h e s c e n e of t h e acci dent. Silence. W i d e - e y e d , staring si lence. Naturally; h o w l o ng h a d it b e e n s i nc e t h e y ' d h e a r d a n y t h i n g like t ha t, s i nc e a n y o n e h ad d a re d i nd i c a t e t h e r e w a s s o m e t h i n g w r o n g with a c c e p t i n g e n o u g h m o n e y f r om y o u r n e i g h b o r s , via t h e fe de ra l g o v e r n m e n t , to b rin g y o u r i n c o m e up to a livable seventy-fiv e hundred? A big jet w e n t o v e r a n d s m a s h e d t h e si l e nc e. O n l y t h e hick l o o k e d up. "We ll y o u , you b e t t e r have in s u r a n c e !" t h e fat m a n said. "It w a s n 't m y fa u lt! H e p u l l e d right in f r o nt of m e ! I couldn't— " " H a s n ' t g o t in s u r a n c e !" "Poisoning our k id s ì" " E v e r y b o d y in Louisville may b e sick t o m o r r o w just b e c a u s e of this s o n of a b i tc h — a n d h e isn't e v e n f r o m K e n tu c k y !" CRASH. N o o n e k n e w w h o t h r e w t h e brick o r w h e r e h e ' d f o u n d it. Pr o ba b ly c ar r ie d it in his car; s ens i bl e! N o o n e e v e r k n e w w h o s t a r te d t h i n gs . It j us t c a m e flying o u t of t h e air, w h i z z e d past t h e o u t - o f - st at er 's f ace a n d s m a s h e d i nto t h e d o o r o f his old p a l e - bl u e Pontiac. H e b e l l o w e d , s t a r e d a t t h e u gl y d e n t . T u r n e d h o r r i f i e d , e n r a g e d e ye s o n t h e clot of a n g r y Lou¡sv¡ll¡ans. T h e n h e b e n t for t h e brick. " W a t c h o u t ! " t h e fat m a n yel led. " H e ' s g o n n a t h r o w t ha t brick at u s ! " CRASH. A n o t h e r brick. This o n e s l a m m e d i nto t h e Ponti ac's w i n d o w , 25
M E A N W H I L E , W E E L I MI N A T E
n e a r t h e roof, a n d b o u n c e d off a n d hit t h e dr iver 's back. He g r u n t e d . T he s h a t t e r p r o o f w i n d o w b e c a m e a c o b w e b b e r y of radiating cracks. T he brick d r o p p e d t o t h e g r o u n d . Wi t h t h e first brick in his left h a n d , t h e dri ver r e a c h e d for t h e s e c o n d . The fat m a n s t e p p e d f or wa r d a n d j a m m e d his b o o t e d f oo t down on the sun-brow ned hand. A jet s c r e a m e d over . The m a n b e h i n d t h e fat m a n b e n t quickly a n d s n a t c h e d u p t h e brick. The H o o s ¡ e r hit t h e fat m a n ' s calf a n d a nk l e wi th t h e brick h e ' d p i c k e d up . T he fat m a n s c r e a m e d . T h e m a n b e s i d e him s w u n g his brick a n d t h r e w it, mi ss ing t h e H o o s i e r a n d cl angi ng his car agai n, a n d a r oc k c a m e a r c h i ng in f r o m b e h i n d him, f r om an invisible h a n d ag a i n, a n d t h e dri ver of t h e m¡n¡k hit by t h e Pont ia c s n a r l e d a n d b e n t t o pick u p t h e rock af ter it b o u n c e d off t h e H o o s i e r ' s u p p e r a r m a n d Fred felt a s u r g e of a n g e r a n d d e s i r e t o p u n i s h this m a n w h o h a d e n d a n g e r e d t h e i r lives a n d i n s u l t e d t h e m all a n d t h e H o o s i e r v a n i s h e d b e n e a t h a w a v e of c ur s in g , s t a m p i n g , p u m m e l ¡ n g Lou¡svillians. S o m e u s e d fists, o t h e r s f eet , o t h e r s b ri ef ca se s o r w h a t e v e r t h e y h a d in t he i r cars for d e f e n s e : m a c es t i c ks a n d w r e n c h e s a n d t h e like. Fred Lap¡dus t o o k a w r e n c h a cr os s his w r i st wa t ch a n d s t a g g e r e d back, his wrist d a n gl i n g . He m o a n e d . T he fat m a n fell o u t of t h e m a s s of twi st ing, s wi ng i ng , w r i t hi ng b o d i e s with b l o o d all o v e r his f a c e . S o m e o n e s c r e a m e d . T h e I n d i a n a n s e e m e d t o m a k e n o n o is e at all, just flailing a n d g r a b b i n g a n d t aki ng b l o w after blo w. T he n o i s e of t h e overflyi ng jet d i d n ' t e v e n d r o w n o u t t h e i r no is e. " P u t '¡m b a c k in his sti nk ing car a n d g e t t h e s o n u v a b i t c h off o u r f r e e w a y ! " s o m e o n e yelled. T he y p u t him b ac k in his st i nk i ng car, l imp a n d b l e e d i n g a n d h e l p le s s, a n d s l a m m e d t h e d o o r . T h e n t h e y p u t t h e i r backs t o it a n d g o t t h e s o n u v a b i t c h off t h e i r freeway. By t h e t i m e t h e F.P.F. c h o p p e r — a t er ri bl e p ol lu te r , b u t w h a t a re y o u g o i n g to d o ? — s w u n g d o w n o v e r h e a d , t w e n t y o r thirty 26
A N D R E W J. O F F U T T
m e n w e r e st rai ni ng a n d t h e old Pont iac w as p o i s e d wit h b o t h left tires off t h e p a v e m e n t by a f o o t o r m o r e . "THIS IS THE FEDERAL POLICE FORCE. STOP WHAT YOU'RE D O I N G AND MOVE O N AT O N C E ! " t h e big voi ce b e l l o w e d d o w n f ro m t h e Fep c h o p p e r . O n e last g o o d strain a n d t h e o ld Pont iac a n d its d ri ve r w e n t off t h e fr e ewa y. It d r o p p e d t e n f eet, s t r uc k a s u p p o r t with a t er ri bl e cl an g a n d a s h r i e ki n g gr at e of metal o n metal a n d w as c a t a p u l t e d o u t w a r d . It d r o p p e d a n o t h e r thirty f e e t a n d s h e a r e d off a This Is My C o u n t r y f l ag po l e just b e f o r e s m a s h i n g at an a n g l e a cr oss t h e r oo f of B o r s t e l m a n n ' s Delly. T he roof a n d f r o nt wall of B o r s t e l m a n n ' s Delly r es i s te d m o m e n t a r i l y , t h e n c o l l a p s e d t o g e t h e r wi th t h e P ont iac o n t o t h e si de w al k a n d s tr ee t. Mrs. B e n s o n R. Ca r ri th e rs a n d h e r d a u g h t e r Ev¡e w e r e killed instantly. Mi r acul ous ly, little T e d d y , w h i z z i n g d o w n t h e s i d e w al k in t h e p r a m his m o t h e r h a d b e e n p u s h i n g , w as totally u n h u r t . Sa m B o r s t e l m a n n r u s h e d o u t o f his d e l i c a t e s s e n , l o o k e d u p w a r d at t h e faces s tar ing d o w n at him f ro m t h e f r e e wa y a n d r u s h e d b ac k inside. A jet r o c k e d t h e h o v e r i n g c h o p p e r . "EMERGENCY IS DECLARED," a Fep o v e r h e a d w a r n e d with his m i c r o p h o n e , a n d t h e m a n w h o s e minik h ad b e e n s tr uc k in t h e r ear by t h e H o o s i e r j u m p e d into his m a c h i n e a n d d r o v e off as fast as h e c ou¡ d. "LAST W A R N I N G ! " a Fep in t h e c h o p p e r said. B l ee di ng p r o f us e l y f r o m t h e face, t h e fat ma n g o t t o o n e k n e e a n d t h e n t o his f eet . He s t ar t ed l u r c hi n g t o w a r d his car. " H e r e ! This o n e ' s g e t t i n g a w a y , " a m a n s h o u t e d . He had j ust p ul l ed u p a n d s t o p p e d , a n d h e r e a c h e d b a c k into his car a n d g r a b b e d a d e f e n s e r . He s w u n g it. T h e n e e d l y little b e a m of light c u t t h e fat m a n half in t w o , c a u t er i z i ng t h e w o u n d nicely. Fred Lapidus, m o a n i n g a n d c l u t c hi n g his b r o k e n wrist c lo se t o his c h e s t , t r ie d t o p u s h his way t o his car. " W h e r e t h e hell y o u t h i n k y o u ' r e g o i ng , b u d d y ? " a ma n s n a r l e d , a n d Fred h a d an i ns ta nt' s vi ew of a ga ri nk suit s l ee ve b e f o r e t h e fist p r o t r u d i n g f r o m it s l a m m e d into his left eye. 27
M E A N W H I L E , W E ELIMINATE
“ Look at t h e suit t h e b a s t a r d ' s w e a r i n g , " t h e m a n said, kicking Fred as h e c o l l a p s e d . "Rich s o n of a b i t c h ! " Below, Sam B o r s t e l m a n n e m e r g e d f ro m his delly. Almost w i t h o u t ai mi ng , h e let g o wi th b o t h barrel s of his o ld s h o t g u n . Se v en o r e i g h t m e n s c r e a m e d w h e n p el le ts s t r u c k t h e i r faces a n d n e c k s a n d h a n d s , a n d o t h e r pel let s t ¡n k- ti nk e d off t h e hovering chopper. T he d o o r - m o u n t e d laser s e n t a penci l- thin b e a m d o w n to w i d o w Mrs. Sam B o r s t e l m a n n . T h e m a n b e h i n d t h e g u n n e r t o s s e d t h r e e gas g r e n a d e s o u t t o b u r s t o n t h e fr ee wa y. St upi d, b u t e v e n Feps ha ve b e e n k n o w n t o d o t h e w r o n g th in g . Extraor d ina ry p o w e r s a r e n ' t c o n d u c i v e t o ma k i n g a m a n s t o p a n d t hi nk carefully. Six m e n j u m p e d f r o m t h e f r e e w ay to t h e i r d e a t h s in a n a t t e m p t t o e s c a p e t h e v o mi t gas. T h r e e o t h e r s fell o r w e r e k n o c k e d off t h e fr ee wa y. Wi th in s e v e n m i n u t e s t h i r t y - o n e m¡n¡ks a n d t h r e e m a x i b u s e s w e r e piled u p in t h e swirling mist of yellowpi nk gas. They d r a g g e d Fred Lap¡dus f r o m u n d e r o n e of t h e maxis t h r e e h o u r s later, b u t by t h a t t i m e h e h a d b l e d t o d e a t h . Besides, e v e r y o n e w a s very, ver y b u s y with t h e riot in t h e s t r e e t b e l o w . The t o r c h e d a u t o m o b i l e a n d e n s u i n g riot e ve nt ua l l y b u r n e d o u t 3.2 b l oc k s , o r so t h e official r e p o r t s said. For t unat el y, only n i n e t e e n p e r s o n s w e r e killed a n d o nl y s e v e n t y - t h r e e w e r e h o s pitalized, t w e n t y - o n e in critical c o n d i t i o n . But a F r e n c h - m a d e SST c r a s h e d just i ns id e t h e C h i n e s e b o r d e r t h at day, a n d t h e C h i n e s e a t t a c k e d t h e I ndi ans o n t h e b o r d e r , a n d Pe k in g a n d N e w Delhi s t a r t e d s c r e a m i n g at e a c h o t h e r , a n d t h e i n c i d e n t in Louisville m a d e onl y t h e b a c k p a g e of t h e first s e ct io n of m o s t p a p e r s . Mrs. Lap¡dus w a i t e d s u p p e r till ten-thirty. T h e n c a m e t h e p h o n e call f r om t h e Federal Police Force, a n d s h e fai nted.
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Thine A lab aster C ities G leam LAURENCE M . JANIFER
T h e lights of t h e city b e l o w w e n t right o n s h i ni n g, j us t as if n o t h i n g h a d g o n e w r o n g with t h e Seawell Building. After a whi le t h e si ght of t h e n o r m a l city h a d b e g u n t o irritate H a n l on , b u t of c o u r s e h e d i d n ' t let t h a t s h o w : a display o f pe tt y e m o t i o n w o u l d b e w o r s e t h a n u s e l e s s, it w o u l d b e d e m e a n i n g . I ns t ea d, h e c o n t i n u e d t o signal wi th his pencil flashlight, t h r e e long a n d t h r e e s h o r t a n d t h r e e l on g again. T he tiny flash, a p r e s e n t f r o m his six-year-old s o n w h i c h h e w a s s e n t i m e n t a l e n o u g h t o carry, d i d n ' t s e e m t o t h r o w m u c h light; h e c o u l d feel hi msel f slowly losing t o u c h wit h h o p e . Kitty w a s n ' t m a k i n g a ny s o u n d t h a t h e c o u l d h e a r, b u t w h e n h e m a n a g e d t o t u r n away fr om t h e w i n d o w a n d t h e lights b e l o w , h e c o u l d s e e h er , still at h e r p o s t six o r s e v e n f ee t away, s c r a t c h i n g at t h e u n b r e a k a b l e glass with h e r ring. H a n l o n felt t h e n e e d o f c o n t a c t b e t w e e n t h e m , t h e n e e d of s o m e c o m m u n i c a t i o n . M a y b e it w o u l d e a s e t h i n g s a bit. After a f e w s e c o n d s h e said, " H o w ' s it g o i n g ? " at r a n d o m , a n d his vo ic e s o u n d e d s ur pr is ingl y l o ud in t h e small r o o m . Kitty s t o p p e d s c r a t c h i n g as if s h e t o o h a d real ized t h a t t h e t i m e h a d c o m e for a b r e a k of s o m e sort. You c a n ' t o v e r w o r k y o u r a ssist ant s, H a n l o n t h o u g h t . T h e h u m a n factor. "It' s all r ig ht , " Kitty said flatly. "I g u e s s it's lucky I h a v e this ring h e r e . " " D i a m o n d o u g h t t o c u t t h r o u g h g l a ss , " H a n l o n said, just to k e e p th e c o n v e rsa tio n going. Disaster m a d e e ve rybo dy e q u a l , af ter all. "Even u n b r e a k a b l e gl ass. " "I t 's m a k i n g s c r a t c h e s , a n y h o w , " Kitty said. S h e s q u i n t e d h o p e f u l l y at t h e t r a n s p a r e n t wall a n d t h e n , as s h e r e l a x e d , 29
THINE ALABASTER CITIES GLEAM
s e e m e d t o n o t i c e for t h e first t i m e t h e lights b e y o n d it. "I w o n d e r w h e n they'll miss u s , " s h e said. " An y t i me n o w , " H an l o n said, as c h e er fu l ly as h e c ou l d. That w a s t h e e x e c ut i v e 's j o b : t o ma in ta in h o p e f or his w o r k e r s — e v e n w h e n t h e r e w a s onl y o n e w o r k e r — f or as l o ng a t i me as p o s si bl e . But it w a s n ' t w o r k i n g , n o t really: Kitty onl y n o d d e d cynically. " S u r e , " s h e said. " S u r e . O n Sa tur da y night , t w o p e o p l e w o r k ing a l o n e , t h e c l e a n i n g staff g o n e , n o b o d y e x p e c t s e i t h e r of us h o m e — isn't t h a t right?" T h e r e w a s n o p o i n t in d e l u d i n g t h e child, H a n l o n t old himself. Not a n y m o r e . "Th a t' s ri gh t ," h e said. "I said I'd stay in t o w n . S o m e hot el o r o t h e r . " He t h o u g h t fleet¡ngly of t h e s u b u r b s , w h e r e th e r e w e r e no u n b re a k a b le -g las s buildings, locked, u n b r e a c h a b l e , se rv ic ed by air c o n d i t i o n i n g — nat ural t a r ge ts for a b l o w o u t . If t h e b l o w o u t h a d b e e n city-wide o r e v e n districtwide . . . Such t h o u g h t s w e r e u s e le s s. H a n lo n p u t d e s p o n d e n c y away a n d tr i ed t o l ook s t r o n g a n d c o n f i d e n t . It s e e m e d t h e least he c o u l d d o. " Li k e w i s e , " Kitty said. "I m e a n — a n y h o w , w o r k i n g s o late, a n y h o w , w h o ' s g o i n g to miss us ? " H a n l o n t u r n e d back t o t h e glass wall a n d p u s h e d t h e b u t t o n of his flashlight again. T h r e e l on g a n d t h r e e s h o r t a n d t h r e e long. Ma y b e , h e t h o u g h t s u d d e n l y , h e h a d it w r o n g . " W h a t is SOS, a n y h o w ? " " Lon g, s h o r t , l o n g , " Kitty said. " T h r e e of e a c h . " " N o t t h e o t h e r wa y a r o u n d ? " " W h a t o t h e r way?" " S h o r t a n d l on g a n d s h o r t , " H a n l o n said. Either v er si on s o u n d e d eq u a ll y p r o b a b l e w h e n h e t h o u g h t a b o u t it. An d it d i d n ' t m a t te r , n o t really: n o b o d y w as g o i n g t o s e e t h e light. Not fr om t h e fiftieth story of a d a r k glass b u i l d in g at t e n- fi f te en at night. N o b o d y w o u l d b e look i ng . All t h e o t h e r b u i ldi ngs w e r e okay. Usel ess. H o p e l e s s . But h e b e g a n again with t h e tiny flash, this t i me trying it t h e o t h e r w ay a r o u n d , for variety. 30
L A U R E N C E M . J A N I F ER
"J ust so it's a s i g na l, " Kitty said. "J u s t so p e o p l e k n o w . " T h e p o o r girl n e e d e d h o p e . A g o o d s e c r e ta r y, b u t n o t e x e c u tive mat er ial : n o mor al fiber, n o t w h e n it c o u n t e d . H a n l o n tried t o s o u n d calm a n d s u r e of himself. " T h e r e h av e b e e n p o w e r failures b e f o r e , " h e said. " T h e y g e t e v e r y t h i n g r u n n i n g just as s o o n as p o s s i b l e . " " S u r e , " Kitty said again. " O n l y m a y b e this t i m e it w o n ' t b e fast e n o u g h . I m e a n , y o u h a v e t o f ace f act s. " P e r h a p s , h e t h o u g h t , s h e ha d a r u d i m e n t a r y s t r e n g t h after all. He w as p l e a s e d t h a t h e h a d m a d e a g o o d c h o i c e , t a ki ng h e r o u t o f t h e secret ari al pool . "This is j ust an office b u i ld i n g , a n e w o n e . O n a S at ur da y ni ght, t h e y f igure e v e r y b o d y ' s g o n e . T h e y w o n ' t b e in t o o m u c h of a h ur ry; e v e r y t h i n g o u t t h e r e is still o k a y . " S h e g e s t u r e d at t h e w o r l d b e y o n d t h e glass. H a n l o n s h o o k his h e a d . " You t h i n k t h e y ' d r ea li ze ," h e said slowly. " N o lights, n o electricity— " " A n d n o a ir ," Kitty said violently. " Yo u m i g h t as well say it. W h e n t h e p o w e r w e n t off, t h e air c o n d i t i o n i n g s e a l e d itself a n d w e n t off, a n d t h e r e a r e n ' t a n y w i n d o w s . Just s h e e t s of glass, a n d t h e r e ' s n o w ay t o o p e n a s h e e t of glass. M o d e r n . " " Exc ep t with a d i a m o n d , " H a n l o n said, tryi ng to g e n t l e t h e girl a bit. Kitty s h r u g g e d . "It m a k e s s c r a t c h e s , " s h e said. "T ha t' s all it d o e s . " As brightly as h e c o u l d , H a n l o n p u t in, " A n y h o w , t h e air's still p re tt y g o o d . " "I t' s b e g i n n i n g t o g e t s ta l e, " Kitty said e venl y. " P a r d o n m e for m e n t i o n i n g it." H a n l o n n o d d e d , d e f e a t e d . " M a y b e w e ' d b e t t e r s t o p talking for a w h i l e . " "I g u e s s s o . " But w i t h o u t c o n v e r s a t i o n his t h o u g h t s w e n t s p i n n i n g into hopeless m em ory. The te le p h o n e s hadn't w orked, either, t h o u g h y o u w o u l d n ' t t h i n k p h o n e s w o u l d b e so h a r d to m a n a g e . But w i t h o u t a s w i t c h b o a r d o p e r a t o r it was i m p o s s i b l e t o d is c o v e r t h e right c o n n e c t i o n s . O n e of t h e little b u t t o n s h a d b e e n 31
THINE ALABASTER CITIES GLEAM
l a be l e d wit h a small p a p e r t h a t said 079 a n d n e i t h e r H a n l o n n o r Kitty k n e w w h a t it m e a n t . A n o t h e r o n e w as l a be l e d C a n c el, a n d t h e rest d i d n ' t s e e m t o have a ny d e f i n a b l e f u n ct io n at all. He left off signali ng briefly— h e h a d b e e n us in g b o t h p a t t e r n s i n t e r c h a n g e a b l y — a n d w e n t wearily o v e r t o t h e w a t e r c o o le r . T he w a t e r w a s g e t t in g w a r m , a l m o s t b r a ckis h. Just t h e s li ghtest bit b r a ck ish . As h e d r a n k , h e t h o u g h t f or t h e t e n t h o r t h e h u n d r e d t h t i me a b o u t m a k i n g a d a s h for t h e r oof o r for t h e g r o u n d . Surel y t h e r e h a d t o b e s o m e w ay o f g e t t i n g o u t of t h e b u i ld i ng f r o m t h e g r o u n d fl oor , e v e n if t h e u n b r e a k a b l e d o o r s o nl y w o r k e d o n an ele ct ri c-e ye linkage. And if t h e r e w a s s o m e s o r t of d o o r t o t h e r oo f t h e r e w o u l d b e air. T h ey c o u l d leave t h a t d o o r o p e n a n d c o m e b a c k t o t h e office for w a t e r a n d b e p er fe ct ly o k a y until h e l p arrived o n M o n d a y . But h e k n e w h e w a s o nl y i n d u l g i n g h ims el f with fantasy. Wit h t h e air g o i n g b a d , h e c o u l d n ' t m a k e t h e thirty-story trip t o t h e r oo f a n d n e i t h e r c o u l d Kitty. In fact, it h a d n ' t really b e e n p o s s i b l e f r om t h e first. Kitty h a d t r ie d a n d m a n a g e d e l e v en st ori es, a n d H a n l o n h a d a lr e ad y b e e n t h o u g h o n e h e a r t attack. T h e fifty-story trip t o t h e g r o u n d w a s just as i m p o s s i bl e . T h e a u t o m a t i c e l e v at o r s h a d s t o p p e d w o r k i n g , of c o u r s e . Y o u' d t h i n k t h e air in a big b o x like t h e Seawell Building w o u l d last for w e e k s , b u t it w o u l d n ' t . T he air c o n d i t i o n i n g h a d n ' t b e e n w o r k i n g at a b s o l u t e p e a k e v e n b e f o r e t h e b l o w o u t , a n d t w o p e o p l e u s e d u p m o r e air p e r h o u r t h a n H a nl o n w o u l d h a ve i m a g in e d. Scientific facts. Slowly, h e w e n t b a c k t o his si gnali ng, b u t after a f e w s e c o n d s h e r eal ized t h a t t h e r e w as still s o m e t h i n g left t o say. “ I'm s or ry I k e p t y ou l a t e . ” Kitty l o o k e d u p f r o m h e r o w n w o r k . " M e ? D o e s n ' t m a t t e r , ” s h e said. But it did, of c o u r s e . "If I h a d n ' t n e e d e d a s e cr e ta r y t o ge t this l a st - mi n ut e stuff into s h a p e — " " C l a d t o d o it," Kitty said. " M a y b e t h e o v e r t i m e c h e c k will 32
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pay extra f une ra l e x p e n s e s , after c o m p a n y i n s u r a n c e , I m e a n . " T h e w o r d s hu rt . " N o , " h e said. " N o , really. If I'd t h o u g h t — " S h e d i d n ' t w a n t t o c a u s e hi m pai n, h e s a w by h e r face; s h e was q u i t e a g o o d girl for a s e c re ta r y. Q u i t e a g o o d girl. " O h , s u r e ; b u t h o w c o u l d y o u ? " s h e said. "It' s j ust . . . o n e of t h o s e t hi ng s, t h a t ' s it. I d i d n ' t m e a n t o s o u n d nast y o r a ny t h in g . I really d i d n ' t . " Basically a kind girl, a n d efficient, t o o , H a n l o n t h o u g h t . Not t ha t t h e efficiency m a t t e r e d a n y m o r e . " O f c o u r s e y o u d i d n ' t , " h e said as w a r ml y as h e c o u l d . "It' s jus t— I'm i rr it abl e, " s h e said. " T h e air g e t t in g w o r s e , I g u e s s . Not ic e it?" "I s u p p o s e s o . " S h e s t o p p e d s c ra tc hi ng . T h e r e w e r e a f e w ma r ks o n t h e w i n d o w , n o t h i n g m o r e . "I g u e s s this is it, t h e n , " s h e said. H a n l o n s h o o k his h e a d . " F r es h air g o e s t o t h e b o t t o m . " T h e r e wa s always h o p e , if y o u c o u l d find it. "If w e lie d o w n , we'll h ave a l on g t i m e yet. Plenty of t i m e . " T h e r e was always h o p e . Lying d o w n m ig h t a d d an h o u r t o t h e i r t i m e ; w h e n t h a t was u p , m a y b e h e w o u l d t h i n k o f s o m e t h i n g else. T h e r e w a s always h o p e . " O k a y , " Kitty said. " W h y n o t ? " O f c o u r s e s h e w a i t e d until H a nl o n h a d s e t t l e d himself, n e a r t h e w a t e r c o o l e r , b e f o r e s h e lay d o w n hersel f, s o m e d i s t a n c e away. That w as onl y right. "B e S u n d a y s o o n , " s h e said as s h e l o w e r e d h e rs e lf t o t h e neat, e x p e n s i v e c a r pe t . "Yes, it will," H a n l o n said. "We 'l l h e a r t h e c h u r c h bel l s. " T h e r e was a little si le nc e. T h e n Kitty said, " S o l o n g . " " S o l o n g . " H a n l o n t h o u g h t of h o m e , b u t t h e s u b u r b s hardly e xi s te d for him a n y m o r e a n d w h a t i ma g es h e c o u l d r e co v e r only m a d e him sad. B e c o m i n g e m o t i o n a l d i d n ' t d o a ny g o o d , n o g o o d at all. Briefly, h e w o n d e r e d w h a t Kitty w a s t hi nki ng, b u t s o m e h o w t h a t d i d n ' t s e e m i m po r t a nt . N o t h i n g did, n ot really. After a f e w m i n u t e s h e reali zed t h a t h e was lying o n his b ac k a n d h e roll ed carefully o n t o his si d e t o save t h e c r e a s e in his pa nt s. 33
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C ulture Lock BARRY N. MALZBERG
I Friday is make-it. G e o r g e a n d Fred a n d Karl a n d Miller a n d Kenny a n d m e in G e o r g e ' s a p a r t m e n t o n t h e thirty-sixth floor of t h e p r o je c t. Ken ny is t h e c o m p l i c a t i o n ; s i n c e w e h av e t a k e n u p t o g e t h e r , last W e d n e s d a y , a w e e k a go , 1 h a v e b e e n t h i n k i n g a b o u t ma ke -i t n i g h t with a mi xt ur e of f ear a n d d o u b t . S h o u l d w e stay away? S h o u l d w e pas s u p t h e s es s i on ? I k n o w w i t h o u t a ski ng him t h at Ke nny d o e s n o t w a n t t o g o, t h a t w h a t h e feels b u i ld i ng b e t w e e n us etc. is i m p o r t a n t e n o u g h t o t a k e us o u t of t h e circle. N e v e r t h e l e s s , t h e f o r m s m u s t h o l d . If w e d o n o t c o m e , t h e r e will b e q u e s t i o n s raised a b o u t t h e a b s e n c e a n d t h e t e n u o u s solidarity of t h e g r o u p itself ma y b e m e n a c e d . W h a t will h a p p e n b e t w e e n K e n ny a n d m y s e l f will h a p p e n ; exclusive of make-its. I e xpl ai n this t o him. Q ui e tl y, sullenly, h e n o d s . W e g o into t h e e l e v a t o r a n d t o G e o r g e ' s a p a r t m e n t , t h e t w o of us by o u r e n t r a n c e a lr e ad y s h o w i n g t h e m e v e r y t h i n g they n e e d to know. Leers, wi nks , s h o u t s of g r e e t i n g as w e b l e n d i nto t h e circle. It is u n d e r s t o o d in t ha t first m o m e n t w h a t is g o i n g o n b e t w e e n Kenny a n d m e . S h o u t e d r e m a r k s fr om Miller, b r u s q u e m u t t e r ¡ngs f r o m G e o r g e , w h o , as t h e h o s t this ni ght, m u s t s p r e a d all of his favors equal ly. Fred winks . O n l y Karl stays away, s h o w ing his c o m p r e h e n s i o n in t h e o n e b l ea k l oo k w e e x c h a n g e . N o t t o o m a n y m o n t h s a g o , it m i g h t h ave b e e n t h e s a m e b e t w e e n Karl a n d me . He is bitter. P e r h a p s not . P e r h a p s I a m me re ly p r oj e c t i n g my o w n e m b a r r a s s m e n t u p o n him. It d o e s n o t m a t 34
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ter. I r e m i n d myself of t his, c l u t c hi n g Kenny's h a n d s b e f o r e t h e lights go o u t ; n o t h i n g mat ter s . D a r k e n i n g . M u s i c r ises f r o m t h e c e n t e r ; t h e m a k e - i t has b e g u n . " R e m e m b e r , " G e o r g e s ay s r i t u a l l y a s w e h u d d l e t o g e t h e r , " r e m e m b e r t h e p r i n c i p l e s . " Since h e is t h e h o s t this w e e k it is n e c e s s a r y t h a t h e m a k e t h e s t a t e m e n t s ; his r e s e n t ment and bo re d o m , however, com e through, even u n d e r the first h a z e of t h e hit. " T h e p r inc ipl e of b l e n d i n g , " G e o r g e says, " t h e p ri nc ip l e of a c c o m m o d a t i o n . T h e p r in c ip l e of s ha r i n g a n d t h a t o f c o n n e c t i o n . B r o th e r s all, o n e t o o n e a n d t h e n t o g e t h e r for t h e g r e a t e r g o o d . " His b r e a t h is a l re a dy r a gg e d , u n e v e n . O u r c l o t h e s c o m e off. "F o r t h e city," G e o r g e says, " f o r t h e city a n d t h u s for t h e c o u n t r y . All t o g e t h e r . All b l e n d i n g . " This is o n e of t h e p r o b l e m s of t h e make-i t, t h e p o s t u r i n g a n d formality with w h i c h , I t h i n k, n o n e of us a g r e e . N e v e r t h e less, w e m u s t g o t h r o u g h it. A t ra di ti on h a n d e d d o w n t o us by f o r e b e a r s . W h o a r e w e t o r e a s o n w h y a n d s o o n ? In t h e d a r k n e s s , I feel Karl's h a n d o n my k n e e a n d t h e d r u g s lift, t h e y vault. He says s o m e t h i n g foul i nt o my ear. " N o , " I say, m o v i n g f r o m him, " n o , n o , " trying t o dive into Kenny's b o d y b u t in t h e d a r k n e s s t h e s h a p e s have b e c o m e r e a r r a n g e d a n d I c a n n o t find him. I feel p r e s s u r e , t h e first t ug s of e n t r a n c e a n d t h e n t h e o o z i n g , familiar slide of Karl's e n t r a n c e as h e b u r i e s h im s e lf in m e , t h e first t i m e in m an y m o n t h s . " N o , " I say agai n, b u t in a w h i m p e r i n g way. He has m a d e m e t h e w o m a n . Karl has always m a d e w o m e n of his p a r t n e r s ; this is w h y it n e v e r c o u l d have b e e n w o r k e d o ut . "I t' s m ak e - i t , " Karl says, m o v i n g o n t o p of m e , "it' s make-it a n d y o u c a n n o t d e n y . You'll h av e y o u r slut lat er , " a n d I feel his m o m e n t s of a c c e s s i o n t h e n , s u b m i t to him slowly, small bits a n d p i e c es of myself yi eldi ng t o Karl, a n d t h e n t h e old fire, h o w e v e r unwillingly, rises. " Yo u t r a m p , " Karl says, s l a m m i ng h i ms e l f i nt o m e , a n d u n d e r t h e d r u g s , in t h e d a r k n e s s , I feel my w h i m p e r s t u r n t o w a r d s u b m i s s i o n a n d at last, h o w e v e r rel uct antl y, t o lust as h e o v e r t a k e s m e . At his p e a k I r e ac h blindly, h o p i n g t h a t I will t o u c h Kenny, 35
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b u t my f ingers s quir rel emp ti l y a gai ns t t h e s ur f ac e s of G e o r g e ' s rug a n d it is o nl y lint a n d d u s t t h a t my p a lm s g a t h e r as Karl w o r k s his will.
II In t h e m o r n i n g , in my a p a r t m e n t , t h e d r u g s still di ssipat ing f r om my s y st e m, h e t u r n s t o m e in t h e b e d , his face o p e n a n d p a i n e d , a n d h ur t l es hi ms el f a ga ins t m e , n o t for c o n n e c t i o n b u t for c o m f o r t . I g a t h e r him a ga ins t m e , w h i c h is all t h a t I c an d o , feel his m o a n s a ga in s t my s h o u l d e r , a c c e p t his n e e d , w h i c h is all t ha t I c an d o . H e is t r e m b l i n g , d e p e n d e n t ; he will always b e a w o m a n , w h i c h is, possibly, his primal attract ion for m e , a l t h o u g h already, in j us t t h e e i gh t h day o f o u r s e r i o u s r e l at i o n s hi p , h e is a l re a d y b e c o m i n g b u r d e n s o m e . " W h y ? ” h e is s ayi ng t o m e , " W h y m u s t this be? I d o n ' t u n d e r s t a n d it. W h y c a n ' t w e j us t b e t o g e t h e r ? W h y c a n ' t p e o p l e just live? W h y d o w e h av e t o g o t o t h e make-¡ts a n d t r a d e off like that? It's evil, I tell y o u . It isn't t h e w ay t h a t it s h o u l d b e , ” And t w e n t y - t h r e e year s o ld , h e b e g in s t o s ob . I pa t his n e c k a bs ent l y . " N o c h o i c e , ” I say, a n d "This is t h e wa y it m u s t b e " a n d " W e still h av e e a c h o t h e r , d o n ' t w e ? ” T h e a iml ess p la t i tu d es t h a t , for Kenny, a r e as c lo se as h e can c o m e t o k n o w l e d g e , a n d at last h e q u i e ts . W i t h o u t lust I ho ld hi m, s h r o u d him wit h my b o d y . At l e ng t h h e s l e e p s , u n b o n d e d f r o m t h e d r u g - p a n i c at last, a n d I e a s e f r o m t h e b e d , relieve myself, a n d t h e n wa lk t o t h e w i n d o w w h e r e I look o u t u p o n t h e city for a l o n g t i me , willing my m in d t o w a r d b l a n k n e s s a n d a c c e p t a n c e as it is s ta t e d in t h e pr inci pl es. D u s t sifts u p w a r d , light d o w n , light s h i m m e r s a n d g l i m m e r s t h r o u g h t h e o n e h u n d r e d s tor ie s of t h e pr o je c t, g r o u p e d u p o n o n e a n o t h e r like b o d i e s g r a p p l i n g at a make-it. At a far d i s t a n c e I t h i n k t h a t I c a n s e e t h e limits a n d b e y o n d t h a t still, a hint of fire, b u t this m u s t b e o n l y fati gue a n d I b l o c k o u t t h e illusion, g o i n g b ac k t h e n t o t h e b e d . Kenny lies t h e r e o p e n m o u t h e d , his f ace a child's f ace, his c h e s t m o v i n g easily, h e l p le s s a ga in st my ga z e. I c o u l d m o u n t 36
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him like a stallion a n d h av e my way; I c o u l d s tr a ng l e hi m in his s l e e p a n d n o o n e w o u l d k n o w t h e d i f f e r e n c e ; I c o u l d st ag ge r with him t o w a r d t h e w i n d o w a n d t h r o w him d o w n fort y- seven st ori es o f p r o j e c t t o let him b u r s t u p o n t h e p a v e m e n t a n d n o o n e c o u l d s t o p m e . He is c o m p l e t e l y at my will; I c o u l d d o a n y t h i n g t o him t h a t I w a n t e d a n d this, t h e n , m u s t b e part of t h e e x c i t e m e n t . S t a n d i n g by t h e b e d , l o o ki n g u p o n him, I find t h a t my fists a re c l e n c h i n g a n d u n c l e n c h i n g in t h e old r h y t h m of m a s t u r b a t i o n , b u t I d o n o t d o it. I ns te a d I crawl b e s i d e him o n t h e b e d , carefully s o as n o t t o w r e c k his s l e e p , a n d roll a ga in st him, a n d t h e n f or a wh il e 1 myself s le e p , t h e s o u n d s a n d o d o r s of t h e city c o m b a t i n g d r e a m s for a wh i le for a t t e n t i o n a n d t h e n d i s a p p e a r i n g at last in an oily a n d satisfying e n c l o s u r e w h i c h I m u s t k n o w as rest. Ill In t h e m o r n i n g again, b u t later, Kenny a n d I arise a n d leave my r o o m quietly, j o u r n e y d o w n t h e fo rt y - se ve n flights of t h e p r o j e c t a n d t a k e a l o n g w al k a r o u n d t h e w i n d i n g p a t hs , e n d i n g at last at t h e g at es b e y o n d w h i c h lies t h e river. H a n d in h a n d w e l oo k at t h e river for a l o ng t i m e , tal ki ng q ui et ly of a r r a n g e m e n t s , plans, possibilities. By s o m e u n p h r a s e d u n d e r s t a n d i n g , w e ha ve a g r e e d n o t t o m e n t i o n t h e make- it agai n, n o t this day, m a y b e n ot for several days. W e d e c i d e t h a t t h e t i m e has c o m e in o u r r e l a t i o n s h i p w h e r e Kenny will v a c at e his a p a r t m e n t o n t h e fifty-sixth a n d m o v e in with m e , at least o n a t e m p o r a r y basis. A f t e r t h a t , w h o k no ws ? We w¡ l l s e e w h e r e t h e r e l at io ns hi p g o e s. His f inge rs a ga in st my pal m be gin t o exci te m e ; I r u b t h e small of his back, f ee li ng t h e s lo w b e a t of him radiating. “ Will it w o r k ? " Ke nny says. “ Will it w o r k b e t w e e n us ? " He has a lr e ad y told m e t h a t at t h e b e g i n n i n g of his r e la ti on s hi ps h e is s e n t i m e n t a l , h o p i n g for p e r m a n e n c e , h o p i n g t ha t this o n e at last will g r an t hi m stability. It's o n ly later th a t I b e c o m e a b itc h , h e has w a r n e d m e , w h e n I rea lize th a t I will n e v e r fin d th a t sta b ility a n d th e n y o u w ill h a te m e . But t h a t is a g o o d way off, w e e k s at least o r p e r h a p s m o n t h s until my r e la t i on s hi p 37
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with Ken ny b e c o m e s s o u r a n d e m b i t t e r e d , a n d e v e n t h o u g h I c an s e e t h e p a t t e r n s c o al e s c i n g faintly, like t h e s h a p e s of d e a d a ni ma l s in t h e river, t h e y d o n o t c o n c e r n m e n ow . " Y e s , " I say, "y e s, it will w o r k b e t w e e n u s . " Looki ng at t h e river, t h i n k i n g of t h e city, all of t h e city s e e m i n g t o o v e r t a k e m e n o w o n this late a n d s t r a n g e m o r n i n g , my b o d y still a c h i n g f r o m Karl's p e n e t r a t i o n b u t y e a r n i n g t o w a r d this n e w lover by my s i de . "It' s g ot t o w o r k , " I say. "I p r o m i s e t ha t it will w o r k . " T hi nk i ng of t h e city a n d h o w w e have c o m e t o survive in it a n d h o w w r o n g , h o w w r o n g all of t h e s ociologi st s a n d analysts of forty ye ar s a go w e r e b e c a u s e t h e p a t t e r n s t h a t t h e y d e t e c t e d as t h e s i c k n e ss of t h e city w e r e , i n d e e d , o n l y t h o s e of h e a lt h ; it w as t h e a c c o m m o d a t i o n t h a t t h e y saw, b u t l o c k e d into t h e i r c u l t u r e as w e a re n o t , t h e y di d n o t u n d e r s t a n d t h e c u r e for t h e illness b u t , i n s t e a d, gave it a d if f er en t n a m e . "I k n o w it will w o r k , " I say quietly, t e s ti n g t h e f i r m n e s s of his r e c t u m with a del ic at e f inger, f ee li ng t h e g e n t l e pu ls at i o n s f r om t h a t f l o w e r as all u n c o n s c i o u s it w r a p s itself a r o u n d m e , a n d t h e n h e s l u m p s a g ai ns t m e a n d I g a t h e r him in, my lover, my friend. "I d o n ' t t h i n k , " h e says t h e n , "I d o n ' t t hi n k t h a t I c o ul d s t a n d it if it w e n t w r o n g a ga in, I've b e e n h u r t so m u c h . Last ni ght at t h e make-it, w h e n G e o r g e c a m e into m e I t h o u g h t — " " Q u i e t , " I say, p u t ti n g a h a n d a ga ins t his lips, " Q u i e t . W e a g r e e d w e w o u l d n ' t talk a b o u t t h e make-it. That 's a l o n g way off. W e d o n ' t e v e n h av e t o t h i n k a b o u t it for six d a y s . " An d h e l aughs, g e nt ly at first, t h e n h a r d e r , t h e b u r s t s o f his l a u g ht e r carrying him i nto my a r m s , my a r m s t a ki ng him in, little whiffs a n d smel l s of t h e river c o m p o u n d i n g my e x c i t e m e n t , a n d right t h e r e , a ga in st t h e ga te s, wi t h all of t h e p r o j e c t l o o ki n g d o w n — a n d w h o c o u l d c a r e if t h e y w e r e ? w h o c o u l d c ar e? — w e have at e a c h o t h e r , t h e c l o t h e s falling away, o u r b o d i e s j oining, t h e lifting a n d t h e j oi ni ng t o g e t h e r , a n d “O h ! " h e cries at t h e climax. “O h , Bert, I n e v e r th o u g h t it c o u ld b e th is w a y !" He is t w e n t y - t h r e e y ea rs o l d, I a m t w e n ty - ei g ht , b u t it is n o t a m a t t e r of a ge s. T h e r e a re t h i ng s I u n d e r s t a n d all t o o well t h a t 38
BARRY N . M A L ZB ER G
will n e v e r t o u c h hi m, a n d it is t hi s, his frailty, his accessibility to pai n, t h a t m o r e t h a n a n y t h i n g el se m u s t t h r u s t m e o v e r a n d I di ss olve into hi m, g r o a n i n g a n d b e a t i n g a g ai ns t t h e gate, agai ns t t h e river, t h e p r o j e c t revol ving slowly a b o v e us as w e thrash together on the ground. At l e n g t h w e s e p a r a t e , b u t h a n d s i n t e r l o c k e d w e w a l k ba ck t o w a r d t h e p r o j e c t t o m a k e t h e t r a n s fe r of q u a r t e r s in p e rf e ct s i le n ce a n d u n d e r s t a n d i n g . T he make- it is far b e h i n d us. And it will b e six days m o r e until w e m u s t t e s t o u r p a r t n e r s h i p again. IV At t h e b e g i n n i n g with Karl, in t h e s e c o n d w e e k o r t h e third it m u s t have b e e n , w e t o o c a m e d o w n t o t h e river; o h , this m u s t h av e b e e n m o n t h s a go , six o r s e v e n at least, Karl n o w b e i n g as d e a d to m e a n d d i st a n t as t h e s p a c e s of t h e c o u n t r y s i d e I f o r s o o k t o r e t u r n t o t h e city, b u t at t h a t t i m e w h a t was b ui ld in g with Karl s e e m e d significant o r t h e n again m a y b e it w a s n ot , m a y b e n o t h i n g w as significant, a n d w e s t o o d a gai ns t t h e gates l o o k in g u p o n t h e river, j ust as I h a d wi th Kenny t his day, a nd h e t u r n e d t o m e t h e n , d r o p p i n g his h a n d , a n d l o o k i n g at me , h e said, “ Bert, w e ' r e sick. W e ' r e sick a n d w e ' r e totally i ns ane . Bert, d o y ou s e e w h a t ' s b e c o m e of us j us t s o t h a t w e c o u l d survive? Is it w o r t h it? Is it w o r t h it?” An d t h e r e was n o t h i n g to say t o him, t h e r e w a s n e v e r a n y t h i n g t o say t o Karl in any of t h e s e m o o d s , a n d s o I let it pass, I t h e s u b mi s s i v e o n e t h e n , l e an i n g a g a in s t t h e g a te , letting my p o s t u r e go slack, a n d at this i m p r e s s i o n of vul nerabil i ty ( h o w h e always m a d e m e t h e w o m a n ! ) Karl c a m e u p o n m e t h e n a n d g a t h e r e d m e in. “ I d i d n ' t m e a n t o h u r t y o u , " h e said. “ I d i d n ' t w a n t to h u r t y o u. Forget I said it. Forget e ve ry th in g. Just let m e hol d y o u . " And so o n a n d so for th. “ W e a r e n ' t si ck , " h e said. “ It's j ust a d r e a m , a d r e a m of t h e city, a n d so it will p a s s . " And aga ins t t h e g at e t h e n w e did t h e n e ce s s a r y , b u t it was n e v e r as g o o d as t h e w ay it wa s g o i n g t o b e later wit h Kenny (I bel ieve this, I m u s t b e li e v e this), a n d as I rolled u n d e r hi m, eyes fixed 39
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w ay a b o v e t h e p r o j e c t o n t h e d a m p a n d o b t r u s i v e sky, e ye s rolling in t h e s p a s m s of t h e a p p r o a c h i n g o r g a s m , I t ol d myself e v e n t h e n t h a t it w as t e m p o r a r y with Karl, a w ay stat i on, a n d t h a t at t h e very next ma k e -i t I w o u l d have to k e e p my eyes o p e n for s o m e o n e else, s o m e o n e w h o w o u l d r e c o n s t i t u t e m e at t h e level of h e alt h I d e s e r v e d , a n d this is h o w I m e t Kenny, Kenny, w h o h a d n o t b e e n m i n e in o t h e r t h a n a casual way as p a rt of t h e g r o u p for t h r e e full ye ar s, a n d I k n e w t h e n , l o o k i n g at t h e sky, just as I k n o w n o w , e m b r a c i n g my lover y e t again in an e cs t as y of c o n n e c t i o n , t h a t t h e city is g o o d a n d t h e city is merciful b e c a u s e it has given us, in its j ustice a n d w i s d o m , t h e o p p o r t u n i t y to d o w i t h o u t p e na l ty exactly all of t h o s e t h i n gs t h a t w e m u s t in o r d e r t o b e a r it.
R. A . LAFFERTY
The W orld As Will an d W allpaper R.A. LAFFERTY I A te m p la te , a stencil, a p a tte rn , a plan. C orniest, o rn eriest d a m s e l a n d m an, O r d e r ly , e m p t i l y p a s s i o n a n d p i ty , A l l- t h e - W o r ld , A l l - t h e - W o r l d , A l l - t h e - W o r l d City. 13th S tr e e t Ballad
T h e r e is an o ld d i c t i o n a r y - e n c y c l o p e d i a t h a t d e f i n e s a City as " . . . a c o n c e n t r a t i o n of p e r s o n s t h a t is n o t e c o n o m i c a l l y selfc o n t a i n e d . " T h e d i c t i o n a r y - e n c y c l o p e d i a b e i n g an o l d o n e , h o w e v e r ( and t h e r e is n o o t h e r kind), is m i s t a k e n . T he W or l d City is e c o n o m i c a l l y s e l f- c on ta i ne d . It was William Mor ri s w h o r e ad this d ef ini ti on in t h e old b o o k . William w as a b o o k i e , o r r e a di e , a n d h e h a d r e ad parts of several b o o k s . But n o w h e h a d a t h o u g h t : If all t h e b o o k s ar e o ld, t h e n t h i ng s may n o l o n g e r b e as t h e b o o k s indi cate. I will g o o u t a n d s e e w h a t t h i n g s ar e like t o d a y in t h e City. I will t r a v e r s e as m u c h of t h e City as my life allows m e . I may e v e n c o m e t o t h e W o o d B e y o n d th e W orld t h a t my n a m e - g a m e ancestor described. William w e n t to t h e Pe rmit Of fice of t h e City. Si nce t h e r e was o nl y o n e City, t h e r e mi g h t b e onl y o n e Permit Office, t h o u g h it w as n o t large. "I w a n t a p e r m i t t o t r a v e r s e as m u c h of t h e City as my life allows m e , " William told t h e p e r m i t ma n. "I e v e n w a n t a p e rm i t to g o t o t h e W o o d B e y o n d th e W orld. Is t h a t p o s s i b l e ? " T h e p e r m i t m a n did a skittish little d a n c e a r o u n d William, 41
T HE W O R L D A S WI L L A N D W A L L P A P E R
"like a o n e - e y e d g a n d e r a r o u n d a r a t t l e s n a k e . " T he m e t a p h o r was an old a n d h o n o r e d o n e , o n e of t h e fifty-four c o m m o n m e t a p h o r s . They b o t h u n d e r s t o o d it: it d i d n ' t h a ve t o b e v o i ce d. William w as t h e first c u s t o m e r t h e p e rm i t m a n h a d h a d in m a n y days, t h o u g h , so t h e visit st art led him. " S i n c e e v e r y t h i n g is p e r m i t t e d , y o u will n e e d n o p e r m i t , " t h e p e r m i t m a n said. " G o , m a n , g o . " " W h y a r e y o u h e r e t h e n ? " William a s k e d him. "If t h e r e are no p e r m i t s , w h y is t h e r e a Permi t Office?" "This is my n i c he a n d my n o t c h , " t h e p e r m i t m a n said. " D o away with m e a n d my office a n d y ou b e gi n t o d o away with t h e City itself. It is t h e c u s t o m t o t a k e a c o m p a n i o n w h e n you t r a v er s e t h e City." O u t s i d e , William f o u n d a c o m p a n i o n n a m e d Kandy Kalosh a n d t h e y b e g a n t o t r a v e rs e t h e City t ha t w as t h e W o r l d . They b e g a n (it w as n o m o r e t h a n c o i n c i d e n c e ) at a m a r k e r se t in s t o n e t h a t b o r e t h e w o r d s " B e g i n n i n g of Stencil 35,352." The City t i p p e d a n d tilted a bit, a n d t h e y w e r e o n t h e i r way. N o w this is w h a t t h e City w as like: It was n a m e d Will of t h e W o r l d City, for it h a d b e e n c o n s t r u c t e d by a g r e at a n d w o r l d - w i d e s u r g e of creati ve will. After war d, s o m e t h i n g ha d h a p p e n e d t o t h a t s u r g e , b u t it did n o t m a tt e r; t h e City w a s a lr e ad y c r e a t e d t h e n . T h e City w as v ar ied, it w a s joyful, it wa s f re e a n d it c o v e r e d t h e e n t i r e w o r l d . T h e m o u n t a i n s a n d h e i g h t s h a d all b e e n r e m o v e d , a n d t h e City, with its v a ri ous strips of e a r t h a n d s w e e t w a t e r a n d salt w a t e r , f l o a t ed o n t h e o c e a n o n its i n t e r l o c ki ng floaters. As t o m o n e y v al ue s, e v e r y t h i n g w a s f r e e; a n d e v e r y t h i n g w as f ree as t o p e r s o n a l m o v e m e n t a n d p e r s o n a l c h oi c e. It was n o t really c r o w d e d e x c e p t in t h e p la ce s w h e r e t h e p e o p l e w a n t e d it c r o w d e d , for p e o p l e d o love t o c o n g r e g a t e . It w as s ufficient as t o f o o d s t u f f a n d s h e l t e r a n d e n t e r t a i n m e n t . T h e s e t h in gs h av e always b e e n f re e, really; it w a s t h e i r p a ck a g i n g a n d traffic t ha t c ost , a n d n o w t h e p a c k a g i n g a n d traffic w e r e virtually e l imi n a t ed . " W o r k is joy" f l as h e d t h e s ubli mi na l signs. O f c o u r s e it is. 42
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It is a joy to s t o p a n d t u r n into an a r e a a n d w o r k for an h o u r, e v e n an h o u r a n d a half, at s o m e o c c u p a t i o n n e v e r o r s e l d o m a t t e m p t e d b e f o r e . William a n d Kandy e n t e r e d an a r e a w h e r e p e r s o n s m a d e cloth o u t of c lamshell s , s o f t e n i n g t h e m in o n e s o l u t i on , t h e n d r a w i n g t h e m o u t t o f i l ame nt s o n a m a c h i n e , t h e n f o r m i n g ( not weavi ng) t h e m into cloth o n still a n o t h e r m a c h i n e . T h e cloth was n o t n e e d e d for c l o t h i n g o r for cu r t a i ns , t h o u g h s o m e t i m e s it w as u s e d for o n e o r t h e o t h e r . It was for o r n a m e n t a t i o n . T e m p e r a t u r e di d n o t r e q u i r e cl ot h (the t e m p e r a tu r e was e v e r y w h e r e equ itable) and m o d e s ty did not r e q u i r e it, b u t t h e r e w as s o m e t h i n g t h a t still r e q u i r e d a little c lot h as o r n a m e n t . William a n d Kandy w o r k e d for nearly an h o u r with o t h e r h a p p y p e o p l e o n t h e p ro je c t. It is t r u e t h a t t h e i r o w n p r o d u c t i o n was all s t a m p e d “ R e j e c t e d " w h e n t h e y w e r e f i ni s he d, b u t t hat did n o t m e a n t h a t it w e n t all t h e way b a c k t o t h e c lamshel ls , o nl y b ac k t o t h e f i la me nt stage. “ H o n e s t l a b or is n e v e r lost ," William said as s o l e m n l y as a o n e - h o r n e d owl with t h e pip. “ I k n e w y ou w e r e a r e a di e , b u t I d i d n ' t k n o w y o u w e r e a t a l k i e , " Kandy said. P e o p l e d i d n ' t talk m u c h t h e n . H a p p y p e o p l e have n o n e e d t o talk. An d of c o u r s e h o n e s t l ab or is n ev e r lost, a n d small bits of it a r e p l e a s ur a b l e. This p o r t i o n of t h e City ( p e r h a p s all p o r t i o n s of t h e City) f lo at ed o n old o c e a n itself. It h ad , t h e r e f o r e , a slight h e a v e t o it all t h e t i me . “ T he City is a tidy p l a c e " w as an old a n d h o n o r e d saying. It r e f e r r e d t o t h e fact t h a t t h e City m o v e d a little with t h e t ides. It w as a s o r t of j oke. T he t w o y o u n g p e r s o n s c a m e t e n b lo cks ; t h e y c a m e a d o z e n . For m u c h of this t r a v e rs e t h e City ha d b e e n familiar t o William b u t n o t t o Kandy. Th e y h a d b e e n g o i n g w e st , a n d William ha d always b e e n a w e s t e r i n g lad. Kandy, h o w e v e r , h a d always w a n d e r e d e a st f r om h e r h o m e s , a n d s h e was t h e f ar t he st w e s t t hat s h e h a d e v e r b e e n w h e n s h e m e t William. They c a m e t o t h e 14th St r ee t W a t e r Ballet a n d w a t c h e d t h e s w i m m e r s . T h e s e s w i m m e r s w e r e very g o o d , a n d g r e at n u m b e r s 43
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of c ur i ou s l y s h a p e d fish fr ol icked with t h e m in t h e g r e e n saltfresh p oo ls . A n y o n e w h o w i s h e d t o c o u l d , of c o u r s e , swim in t h e W a t e r Ballet, b u t m o s t of t h e s w i m m e r s s e e m e d t o b e regulars. T h e y w e r e p ar t of t h e l a n d s c a p e , of t h e w a t e r s c a p e . William a n d Kandy s t o p p e d t o e a t at an a l g a e - a n d - p l a n k t o n q u i c k - l u n c h pl ac e o n 15th Street. I n d e e d , Kandy w o r k e d t h e r e for half an h o u r , p r e s s i n g t h e p l a n k t o n a n d a d d i n g s qui rt s of special p r o t e a n as t h e p e o p l e o r d e r e d it. Kandy ha d w o r k e d in q u i c k - l u n c h pl a c es b e f o r e . T h e t w o of t h e m s t o p p e d at t h e Will of t h e W o r l d Exhibit Hall o n 16th Street . They w r o t e t h e i r n a m e s with a stylus in wax w h e n t h e y w e n t in, or r at h e r William w r o t e t h e n a m e s of b o t h of t h e m for Kandy c o u l d n o t write. A nd b e c a u s e he b o r e t h e mystic n a m e of William, h e r e ce ive d a car d o u t of t h e slot with a g e n u i n e Will of t h e W o r l d v e r s e o n it: This C i ty o f t h e W o r l d is wills O f W illful folk , a n d n o t h i n g d a u n t s it. W ith d a r in g h e a r t s w e h e w e d t h e hills To m a k e t h e W o r l d as W illy w a n t s it.
Really, h a d it t a k e n s u c h g re at will a n d h e a r t t o bui ld t h e City of t h e W o r l d ? It m u s t have o r t h e r e w o u l d n o t h a v e b e e n a Will of t h e W o r l d Exhibit Hall t o c o m m e n d it. T h e r e w e r e s o m e folks, h o w e v e r , w h o said t ha t t h e b u i l d i ng of t h e W o r l d City h a d b e e n an a u t o m a t i c r e s p o n s e . Kandy, b e i n g illiterate (as t h e slot k n e w) , r e c ei ve d a p i c tu r e card. They s t o p p e d at t h e Cliff-Dweller C o m p l e x o n 17th Street. This part of t h e City wa s n e w t o William as well as t o Kandy. T h e cliffs a n d caves w e r e f ab r i c at ed a n d n o t nat ural cliff dwe ll in gs , b u t t h e y l o o k e d ver y m u c h as ol d cliff d we ll i n g s m u s t h ave l o o k e d . T h e r e w e r e little l a d d e r s g o i n g u p f r o m o n e level t o t h e next. T h e r e w e r e p e o p l e sitting o n t h e little t e r r a c e s with t h e s m a l l - w i n d o w e d a p a r t m e n t s b e h i n d t h e m . D u e t o t h e circular a r r a n g e m e n t o f t h e cliff dwe ll i n g s, very m a n y of t h e 44
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p e o p l e w e r e always visible t o o n e a n o t h e r . T he central c o u r t yar d w a s like a n a m p h i t h e a t e r . Y o u n g p e o p l e p la ye d st¡ckball a n d I ndian ball in this area. They m a d e m u s i c o n d r u m s a n d w hi st les. T h e r e w e r e artificial r a tt le sn ak es in coils, artificial ribs ki nny d o g s , artificial c o y o t e s , artificial w o m e n in t h e act of g r i n d i n g c o r n with h a n d q u e r n s . An d also, in little s he lt er s o r pavilions, t h e r e w e r e real p e o p l e g r i n d i n g s i m u l a c r u m c o r n on apparatus. Kandy Kalosh w e n t into o n e of t h e pavilions a n d g r o u n d c o r n for fifteen m i n u t e s . Sh e h a d a h ea lt hy love for w o r k . Wil liam Morris m a d e c o r n - d o g s o u t of s i m u l a c r u m c o r n a n d s e a w e e d s . It w a s p l e a s a n t t h e r e . S o m e t i m e s t h e p e o p l e s a n g sim u la c ru m Indian son gs. T h e re w e r e p a t t e r n e d blankets, brightly c o l o r e d , a n d w o v e n o u t of b i n d w e e d . T h e r e w e r e b u f f o o n s in ma sk s a n d b u f f o o n suits w h o e n a c t e d in-jokes a n d in-sit uat ions t h a t w e r e u n d e r s t o o d by t h e cliff-dwelling p e o p l e only, b u t t h e y c o u l d b e e n j o y e d by e v e r y o n e . “ All dif f er en t, all d i ff er ent, ever y b lo c k d i f f e r e n t , " William m u r m u r e d in r a p t u r e . It h a d c o m e o n e v e n i n g , b u t e v e n i n g is a v a g u e t h in g . It was n e v e r very bri ght in t h e d a y t i m e o r very d a r k at night. T h e W o r l d City h a d n ' t a clear sky b u t it ha d always a s or t of d i f f us e d light. William a n d Kandy t r a ve le d still f a r t he r we st . “ It is w o n d e r f u l to b e a w o r l d tr a ve l e r a n d to g o o n f o r e v e r , " William e x u l t e d . “ T h e City is so h u g e t h a t w e c a n n o t s e e it all in o u r w h o l e lives a n d e ve ry bit of it is d i f f e r e n t . " “ A talkie y ou a r e , " Kandy said. “ H o w e v e r did I ge t a talkie? If I w e r e a talkie t o o I c o u l d tell y o u s o m e t h i n g a b o u t t h a t every-part-of-it-is-different bit. " "This is t h e g r e a t e s t t h i n g a b o u t t h e w h o l e W o r l d City," William sa n g , “ t o travel t h e City itself for all o u r lives, a n d t h e climax o f it will b e t o s e e t h e W o o d B e y o n d th e W orld. But w h a t h a p p e n s t h e n , Kandy? T h e City g o e s o n fo r ev er , c o v e r ing t h e w h o l e s p h e r e . It c a n n o t b e b o u n d e d . W h a t is b e y o n d t h e W o o d B e y o n d th e W orld?" "If I w e r e a talkie I c o u l d tell y o u , " Kandy said. 45
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But t h e u r g e t o talk wa s o n William Morris. He saw an o l d e r a n d s o m e h o w m o r e e r e c t m a n w h o w o r e an a r m b a n d with t h e l e t t e r i n g “ M o n i t o r " o n it. O f c o u r s e o n l y a r e a d ¡ e , o r b o o k i e , like William w o u l d have b e e n a b l e t o r e ad t h e w o r d . " M y n a m e - g a m e a n c e s t o r h a d to d o with t h e n a m i n g as well as t h e d e s i g n i n g of t h e W o o d B e y o n d th e W o d d ," William t ol d t h e e r e c t a n d smiling m a n , “ for I also a m a William Morris. I a m avid t o s e e this ul ti ma t e w o o d . It is as t h o u g h I have lived for t h e m o m e n t . " “ If y o u will it st ro ng ly e n o u g h , t h e n y ou may s e e it, Willy," t h e m a n said. "B u t I a m p u z z l e d , " William w o r r i e d o u t t h e w o r d s , a nd his b r o w w as f u r r o w e d . " W h a t is b e y o n d t h e W o o d B e y o n d th e W orld?'' "A ri ddl e, b u t an e as y o n e . " T he m a n smi l e d. “ H o w is it t h a t y o u a re a r ea d¡ e a n d d o n ot k n o w s u c h s i m p le t h i ng s ? " " C a n n o t y ou give m e a c l u e t o t h e eas y r i dd le ?" William begged. " Y e s , " t h e m a n said. " Y o u r n a m e - g a m e a n c e s t o r ha d t o d o with t h e d e s i g n i n g of o n e o t h e r part icul ar t h i n g b e s i d e s t h e W o o d B e y o n d th e W o r ld .” " C o m e a l on g, r ead¡ e, c o m e a l o n g , " Kandy said. They w e n t to t h e W e s t Si de S h o w S q u a r e o n 18th Street. N e i t he r of t h e m h a d e v e r b e e n t o s u c h a pl ace, b u t t h e y h ad h e a r d r u m o r s of it for t h e r e is n o t h i n g at all like t h e W e s t Side S h o w S q u a r e o n 18th Street. T h e r e w e r e t h e g r e at ampli fiers with plug-ins e v e r y w h e r e . Not o nl y w e r e t h e i n s t r u m e n t s p l u g g e d in, b u t m o s t of t h e p e o p l e w e r e t h e m s e l v e s p l u g g e d in. And ah! T he w o n d e r f u l s ett ing wa s like t h e b a c k s i d e of old t e n e m e n t s all t o g e t h e r in a r o u g h circuit. T h e r e w e r e p e r i o d fire e s c a p e s t h a t may e v e n h a ve b e e n a c cu r a t e . They l o o k e d as t h o u g h p e r s o n s mig ht actually cl imb u p a n d d o w n o n t h e m . I n d e e d , light p e r s o n s ha d actually d o n e this in t h e past, b u t it was f o r b i d d e n n o w as s o m e of t h e folks ha d fallen to d e a t h o r m a i mi ng . But t h e a t m o s p h e r e was valid. 46
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Listen, t h e r e was p e r i o d w a s h i n g o n p e r i o d c l o t h e sl i n e s! It was f l a p p e d by little w i n d m a c h i n e s j us t as t h o u g h t h e r e w e r e a real w i n d bl owi ng. No w o n d e r t h e y called this t h e s h o w s q u a r e . It was a g l u m - sl u m , a j e t t o - g h e t t o , a u t h e n t i c pas t t i me . T he p e r f o r m i n g p e o p l e (and all t h e p e o p l e o n t h a t pa rt of 18th S tr ee t s e e m e d t o b e p e r f o r m i n g p e o p l e ) w e r e d r e s s e d in ti ght j ea n s a n d s c al l o pe d o r r a g ge d shirts, a n d e v e n in b r o k e n s h o e s full of hole s. It m u s t have b e e n very h o t for t h e m , b ut art is w o r t h it. It was m e m e n t o of t h e t i m e w h e n t h e w e a t h e r was n o t e v e r y w h e r e e q ui t a b l e . T h e r e w e r e i n -d ra ma s a n d i n-j okes a n d in-sit uat ions a c t ed o ut . T he e s s e n c e of t h e little d r a m a s was very i n t e n s e h a t r ed for a g r o u p o r class n o t clearly d e f i n e d . T h e r e w e r e m a n y of t h o s e o l d - p e r i o d e n e m y g r o u p s in t h e va ri ou s d r a m a locat i ons of t h e City. Th e lights w e r e w i t h o u t p a t t e r n b u t t h e y w e r e bright. The mu si c was w i t h o u t t u n e o r m e l o d y or s o n g o r c h o r d b u t it was very l ou d a n d very p a s s i o n a t e . The s h o u t i n g t h a t t o o k t h e pl ac e of s in gi ng was a b s o l u t e l y livid. S o m e of t h e p e r f o r m e r s fell t o t h e g r o u n d a n d w r i t h e d t h e r e a n d f o a m e d at t h e i r mouths. It was a t h i n g t o b e s e e n a n d h e a r d — o n c e . William a n d Kandy finally t o o k t h e i r leave wit h b l e e d i n g ear s a n d m a t t e r - e n c r u s t e d eyes. The y w e n t al o n g to 19th S t r e e t w h e r e t h e r e w a s a MingleMa ng l e . It was n o w as d ar k as it e v e r g o t in t h e City b u t t h e Ma n gl e was well l ighted. Ce rt ai n p e r s o n s at t h e M a n g l e l aughi ngl y t oo k h ol d of William a n d Kandy a n d m a r r i ed t h e m to e a c h o t h e r . They h a d b r i d e a n d g r o o m c r o w n s m a d e of p a p e r a n d t h e y put th e m on their heads. T he n t h e y w i n e d a n d d i n e d t h e m , an old p h r a s e . Really, t h e y w e r e given fine c o g n a c m a d e of fish s e r u m a n d b rai s ed m e a t m a d e of a l ga e b u t also mi xe d with t h e real c h o p p e d flesh of a n ci e n t s . T h e n William a n d Kandy p a d d e d d o w n in t h e g r e at Pad Palace t hat w as next to t h e M a n g l e . Every n i g h t t h e r e w e r e g r ea t n u m 47
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b er s of p e o p l e a l o n g t h a t p a r t of 19th St reet , at t h e MingleM a n g l e a n d at t h e Pad Palace, a n d m o s t of t h e s e folks w e r e friendly, wit h t h e i r g l a ze d e y e s a n d t h e i r d a m p i s h grins. II P le a s a n t m o s t s p e c i a l t o f o lk s o f t h e C lu b ! P le a s a n t for m a n i f o l d m i n i o n s a n d h i n d s o f it! S t u f f t h e m w i th p l a n k t o n a n d c h o p p i n g s a n d c h u b ! S i m p l e t h e C i ty a n d s i m p l e t h e m i n d s o f it. 20th S tr e et Ballad
T he w o r l d ' s r e s o u r c e s a r e c o n s u m e d d ¡ s p r op or t ¡o n a l ly by t h e intel ligent classes. T h e r e f o r e w e will k e e p o u r o w n n u m b e r s drastically r e d u c e d . T h e wa n- wit s h a ve n o t s t r o n g r e p r o d u c t i v e o r c o n s u m i n g u r g e s o l o n g as t h e y a r e k e p t in r e a s o n a b l e c o m f o r t a n d s u s t e n a n c e . T h ey a r e h a p py , t h e y ar e e n t e r t a i n e d ; a n d w h e n t h e y ar e c o n v i n c e d t h at t h e r e is n o m o r e for t h e m to s e e , t h e y b e c o m e t h e a n c i e n t s a n d g o willingly t o t h e c h o p p e r s . But t h e 2 p e r c e n t or so of us s u p e r i o r o n e s are n e c e s s a r y to r un t h e w o rl d . Why then do we keep the others, the simple-minded billions? W e k e e p t h e m for t h e s a m e r e a s o n t h a t o u r a n c e s t o r s k e p t b l o o m s o r lands o r a ni ma ls o r g r e at h o u s e s or t r e e s o r artifacts. W e k e e p t h e m b e c a u s e w e w a n t t o, a n d b e c a u s e t h e r e is n o effort involved. But a g r e at effort was m a d e o n c e . T h e r e w a s a n i nc r ed i b le s u r g e of will. M o u n t a i n s w e r e m o v e d a n d level ed. The sky itself was p ul l e d d o w n , as it w e r e . T h e Will of t h e W o r l d was m a d e ma nif es t. It was a n e w act of c r e at i o n. A nd w h a t is t h e s t e p f ol lo wi ng c r e a ti on w h e n it is d i s c o v e r e d t h a t t h e C o m m o n a l t y is n o t w o r t h y of t h e City c r e a t e d ? W h e n it is d i s c o v e r e d also t h a t t h e y ar e t h e logical cattle t o fill s u c h g r e a t p e n s ? T h e n ext s t e p is hi e ra rc hi es . T he Angel s t h e m s e l v e s h av e hi e r a rc hi es , a n d w e are n o t less. It is t h o s e w h o a r e int el ligent b u t n o t q u i t e intelligent e n o u g h t o join t h e C l u b w h o a re i mp e r i l e d a n d d e s t r o y e d 48
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as a n ec es s i ty t o t h e o p e r a t i o n of t h e City. At t h e s u m m i t is always t h e Cl ub. It is t h e C l ub in t h e s e n s e of a b l u d g e o n a n d also of an o r g a ni z a t i on . Will of T h e W o r l d A n n a ls — Classified Abs tr act In t h e m o r n i n g , Kandy Kalosh w a n t e d t o r e t u r n t o h e r h o m e e v e n t h o u g h it w as nearly t w e n t y bl oc ks t o t h e e a s t w a r d . Wil liam w a t c h e d h e r g o w i t h o u t s o r r o w . Fie w o u l d ge t a w e s t e r i n g girl t o g o with him o n t h e lifelong e x p l o ra t io n of t h e e n d l e ss l y varied City. Fte m ig h t ge t a girl w h o was a talkie o r e v e n a r ead¡ e, o r b o o k i e . A nd h e did. She w as n a m e d Fa¡rha¡r Fa rq uh ar , t h o u g h s h e was actually d a r k of hair a n d of s u r f ac e pati na. But t h e y s ta r te d o u t in t h e early m o r n i n g t o attain ( w h e t h e r in a day o r a lifetime) t h e W o o d B e y o n d th e W orld. " Bu t it is n o t far at all," Fa¡rha¡r said ( s h e was a talkie). " W e can r ea c h it this very e v e n i n g . W e ca n s l e e p in t h e W o o d in t h e very night s h a d o w of t h e f a m o u s M u g g e r s . O h , is t h e m o r n ing n o t w o n d e r f u l ! A b l u e p a tc h wa s s e e n o nl y last w e e k , a real h o l e in t h e sky. M a y b e w e c an s e e a n o t h e r . " T he y did n o t s e e a n o t h e r . It is very s e l d o m t ha t a b l u e (or e v e n a starry) h o l e c an b e s e e n in t h e g r e e n h o u s e glass-gray c o l o r t h a t is t h e sky. The Will of t h e W o r l d h a d p r o v i d e d s u s t e n a n c e f or e v e r y o n e , b u t it was a m u g g y a n d sticky W o r l d City t h a t p r o v i d e d , a l m o s t equ al ly w a r m fr om p o l e t o po le , cloyingly fertile in b o t h t h e land strips a n d t h e w a t e r strips, a n d n o w just a little bit q ue a sy . " R u n , William, r un in t h e m o r n i n g ! " Fa¡rha¡r c rie d, a n d s h e ran wh ile h e s hu ff l ed after h er . Fa¡rha¡r did n o t s uffer m o r n i n g s i c k n e ss b u t m o s t of t h e w o r l d did: it ha d n o t yet b e e n b r e d o u t of t h e races. After all, it was a very tidy wo rld. T h e r e was a g r e a t m e m b r a n e o r f i r m a m e n t built s o m e w h e r e b e l o w , a n d old o c e a n w as p r i s o n e d b e t w e e n this f i r m a m e n t a n d t h e f u n d a m e n t a l r oc k of G e h e n n a - e a r t h . But t h e o c e a n m o n s t e r t o s s e d a n d p i t c h e d a n d wa s n o t e nt ir ely t a m e d : h e wa s still old Leviathan. 49
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Al on g a n d b e h i n d all t h e s t r e et s of t h e W o r l d City w e r e t h e n a r r o w (their w i d t h n o t five t i m e s t h e l e ng th of a man) strips, strips of ver y n e r v o u s a n d i nc re di bl y fertile l and, of salt w a t e r j u m p i n g with fish a n d eel s a n d dar k with t o r t o i s e a n d s o thi ck with b l u e - g r e e n p l a n k t o n t h a t o n e c o u l d a l m o s t wal k o n it, of f re sh w a t e r t e e m i n g with o t h e r fish a n d loggy wit h s n a p p i n g t ur tl es a n d s n ak e s , of o t h e r f re sh w a t e r a l m o s t solid with n o u r ishing alg ae , of mi xe d w a t e r filled with p u r g e d s h r i m p a n d all o ld e s t u a r y life; l and strips again, a n d strips of rich c h emi ca l w a t e r w h e r e p e o p l e v o i d e d t h e m s e l v e s a n d t h e i r u s e d t h i ng s a n d f ro m w h i c h so m a n y va l ua bl e e s s e n c e s c o u l d b e e x tr a c t e d , o t h e r strips, a n d t h e n t h e h o u s e s a n d b u il d in g s of a n o t h e r b loc k, for t h e b loc ks w e r e n o t long. K a l e i d o s c o p e of n e r v o u s w a t e r a n d land, e v e r y w h e r e basic a n d e v e r y w h e r e dif fer ent , b o a t e d wi th b o a t s o n t h e s t r a n g e o v e r p a s s c ana ls , c r o s s e d by an infinity of b r i dg e s. " A n d n o t w o a l i k e ! " William s a n g, his m o r n i n g s ic kn e s s h a v ing left him. "Every o n e d if f er e nt , e v e r y t h i n g d i f fe r en t in a w o r l d t h a t c a n n o t b e t r a v e r s e d in a lifetime. We'll n o t run o u t of w o n d e r s ! " "Wi lli am, William, t h e r e is s o m e t h i n g 1 h av e b e e n m e a n i n g t o tell y o u , " Fairha¡r tr ied t o i n t e r p o s e . "Tell m e , Fairhair, w h a t is b e y o n d t h e W o o d B e y o n d th e W orld, s in ce t h e w o r l d is a g l o b e w i t h o u t b o u n d s ? " " T h e W o r l d Be y o n d t h e W o o d is b e y o n d t h e W o o d B e y o n d th e W o rld ," Fairhair said simply. "If y o u w a n t t h e W o o d , you will c o m e t o it, b u t d o n o t b e cast d o w n if it falls s h o r t for you." " H o w c o u l d it fall s h o r t for me ? I a m a William Morri s. My n a m e - g a m e a n c e s t o r h a d t o d o wit h t h e n a m i n g as well as t h e d e s i g n i n g of t h e W o o d ." " Y o u r n a m e - g a m e a n c e s t o r h a d t o d o wi th t h e d e s i g n i n g of a n o t h e r t h i n g a l s o , " Fairha¡r said. W hy , t h a t w as a l m o s t t h e s a m e t h i n g as t h e m o n i t o r m a n ha d said t h e d a y b e f o r e ! W h a t did t h e y m e a n by it? William a n d Fairhair c a m e t o t h e g r e at C h o p p e r H o u s e at 50
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20th Street . T h e t w o o f t h e m w e n t in a n d w o r k e d for an h o u r in t h e C h o p p e r H o u s e . " You d o n o t q u i t e u n d e r s t a n d this, d o y o u , little William?" Fa¡rha¡r a s k e d. " O h , I u n d e r s t a n d e n o u g h for m e . I u n d e r s t a n d t h a t it is everywhere different." "Yes, I s u p p o s e y ou u n d e r s t a n d e n o u g h f or y o u , " Fa¡rha¡r said with a t o u c h of n e a r s a d n e s s . ( W h at t h e y c h o p p e d u p in t h e C h o p p e r H o u s e was t h e a nc ie nt s. ) T he y w e n t o n a n d o n a l o n g t h e strips a n d s t r e e t s o f t h e e v e r - c h a n g i n g city. T he y c a m e t o 21st S t r e et a n d 2 2n d a n d 23rd. Even a writie c o u l d n o t wr it e d o w n all marvels t h a t w e r e to b e f o u n d at ev e r y s t re et . It is s h e e r w o n d e r t o b e a w o r l d traveler. T h e r e w a s a c a rn i v a l at 2 3 r d S t r e e t . T h e r e w e r e b a r k ¡ e s , s ha rk ie s, spar k¡ es, da rk i es , p ar ki es , a n d m a r ki e s; t h e visitors w e r e t h e ma rk ie s, b u t it w a s n o t really b a d for t h e m . T h e r e was t h e very l o ud m u s i c e v e n t h o u g h it w as s u p p o s e d t o b e p e r i o d t ¡ngl e- tangl e o r r¡nky-d¡nk. T h e r e w as a s t e a m cal l iope with real live s t e a m . T h e r e w e r e t h e h a m b u r g e r s t a n d s with t h e w o n d e r f u l smell o f a t o u c h of garlic in t h e o p e n air, n o m a t t e r t h a t it was a n c i e n t c h o p p e r m e a t a n d c r i n o¡ d - r o ot b u n f r o m w h i c h t h e b u r g e r s w e r e m a d e . T h e r e w e r e g a m e s of c h a n c e , s m o o c h h o u s e s a n d c o o c h h o u s e s , wh¡rly rides a n d t u r n i n g w h e e l s , w ¡ no a n d s te ¡no bars a n d b o r d e l l o s , a n d M o n s ter a n d M i s b e g o t t e n displays in cl amsh el l- cl ot h t e n t s. Really, is a n y o n e t o o o ld t o e n j o y a carnival? T h e n let t hat o n e d e c l a r e hi ms e lf an a n c i e n t a n d t u r n h imse lf in t o a C h o p p e r House. But o n a n d o n ; o n e d o e s n o t tarry w h e n t h e r e is t h e w h o l e W o r l d City t o s e e a n d it n o t to b e c o v e r e d in o n e lifetime. O n 24th (or w as it 25th?) S t r e e t w e r e t h e Flesh Pots, a n d a little b e y o n d t h e m was t h e Cat C e n t e r . O n e a te a n d d r a n k b e y o n d r e a s o n in t h e Fl es h P o t s r e g i o n a n d a l s o b e c a m e e n m e s h e d in t h e Flesh M e s h b o o t h s . A nd o n e c a t t e d b e y o n d r e a s o n in t h e h o n e y c o m b l i k e c u b i c l e s o f t h e C a t C e n t e r . 51
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Fairhair w e n t a n d w o r k e d for an h o u r at t h e Ca t C e n t e r ; s h e se e m e d to be known and popular there. But o n a n d o n ! E ve rywh er e it is d i f f e re n t a n d e v e r y w h e r e it is b e t t er . A l on g a b o u t 27th a n d 28th St r ee ts w e r e t h e T o p of t h e Town a n d Night-Life Knoll, t h o s e g r e a t c a b a r e t c o n c e n t r a t i o n s . It was gin-dizzy h e r e ; it w a s y e s t e r d a y a n d t o m o r r o w e n t a n g l e d with its gr ea t e x p e c t a t i o n s a n d its o v e r p o w e r i n g nost al gia; it wa s as l o u d as t h e W e s t Side S h o w S q u a r e ; it w a s as d i r e c t as t h e M in g l e - M a n g l e o r t h e Pad Palace. It w a s as f leshy as t h e Flesh Pots a n d m o r e catty t h a n t h e Cat C e n t e r . O h , it was t h e j u m p i n g e s t b u n c h of pl a ce s t ha t William h a d ye t s e e n in t h e City. S o m e t h i n g a little sad t h e r e , t h o u g h ; s o m e t h i n g of p as s i on a n d pity t h a t was t o o e m p t y a n d t o o pat. It w as as t h o u g h this w e r e t h e climax of it all, a n d o n e d i d n ' t w a n t it t o b e t h e climax yet. It w as as if t h e T o p of t h e T ow n a n d Night-Life Knoll ( an d n o t t h e W o o d B e y o n d th e W o d d ) w e r e t h e central t h i ng s of t h e W o r l d City. P e r h a p s William s l e pt t h e r e a whil e in t h e s a d n e s s t h a t follows t h e surfei t of flesh a n d a p p e t i t e . T h e r e w e r e o t h e r d o i n g s a n d sayings a b o u t him, b u t most ly his eyes w e r e c l o s e d a n d his h e a d w as heavy. But t h e n Fairhair ha d him u p again a n d r u s h i n g t o w a r d t h e W o o d in t h e still early night. "It is o nl y a b lo ck , William, it is onl y a b l o c k , " s h e sang, " a n d it is t h e pl ac e y ou h av e w a n t e d m o r e t h a n a ny o t h e r . " (The W o o d b e g a n at 29th S tr e e t a n d w e n t o n , it w as said, for t h e s p a c e of tw o full blocks.) But William ran ba dl y a n d h e e v e n w a l k e d badly. He w as w o o z y a n d c o n f u s e d , n o t h a p p y , n o t s ad, j ust full of t h e g r ea t bul k of life in t h e City. H e ' d har dly have m a d e it t o his high goal t h a t ni gh t e x c e p t for t h e h e l p of Fairhair. But s h e d r a g g e d a n d lifted a n d ca rr i e d him a l o n g in h e r fine a r m s a n d o n h e r d u s k y b a c k a n d s h o u l d e r s . H e t o p p l e d of f s o m e t i m e s a n d c r a c k e d his c r o w n , b ut t h e r e w as n e v e r real d a m a g e d o n e . 52
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O n e s o m e t i m e s e n t e r s t h e W o o d B e y o n d in a s o rt of r h yt hmi c d r e a m , g r o t e s q u e a n d c o m i c a nd j olting wit h t h e sway of a s t r o n g f rie nd a n d of t h e tidy w o r l d itself. An d William c a m e in with his a r m s a r o u n d t h e n e c k a n d s h o u l d e r s of t h e girl n a m e d Fa¡rha¡r, with his face b u r i e d in h e r hair itself, with his f e e t t o u c h i n g n o g r o u n d . But h e k n e w it as s o o n as t h e y w e r e in t h e W o o d . He was a f o o t again a n d s t r o n g again a n d in t h e m i d d l e of t h e fabl ed place itself. He w as s o b e r ? No, t h e r e ca n b e no s o b r i e t y in t h e W o o d ; it has its o w n intoxication. But it h a d real grass a n d w e e d s , real t r e e s ( t h o u g h m o s t of t h e m w e r e b u s h e s ) , real b e a st s as well as artificial, real s p r u c e c o n e s o n t h e turf, real bi r ds ( no m a t t e r t ha t t h e y w e r e clat teri ng c rows) c o m i n g in t o roost. T h e r e w as t h e carvan o a k figure of old Robin H o o d a n d t h e tall s p a r - w o o d f or m of t h e gi ant lu m b e r j a c k Paul Bunyan. T h e r e wa s t h e Red Indian n a m e d W h i t e D e e r w h o w a s c ar ve d f ro m c e d a r w o o d . T h e r e was m a p l e s yr u p d r i p p i n g f ro m t h e t r e es (is t h a t t h e way t h e y u s e d t o ge t it?), a n d t h e r e was t h e a r o m a of sl i pp e ry elm with t h e ni gh t d a m p n e s s o n it. T h e r e w e r e t h e f a m o u s M u g g e r s f r om t h e m u g g e r d e c a d e s . They w e r e of p a p i e r - m â c h é , it is t r u e , a n d ye t t h e y w e r e m o s t f e a r s o m e . T h e r e w e r e o t h e r d a n g e r o u s b e as t s in t h e W o o d , b u t n o n e like t h e M u g g e r s . And William a n d Fa¡rha¡r lay d o w n a n d sl ep t in t h e very n i gh t s h a d o w of t h e f a m o u s M u g g e r s for t h e r e m a i n d e r of t h e e n c h a n t e d night.
Ill " W o n d e r - b i r d , w a n d e r - b i r d , w h e r e d o y o u fly?" "All o v e r t h e City, all u n d e r t h e s k y , "W and'ring th ro u g h w o n d e r s o f strip p ies a n d stre e ts , C h a n g in g a n d c h a llen g in g , bitters a n d s w e e t s ." " W a n d er-bird , sq u a n d e r-b ìrd , s h o u l d n o t h a v e b u d g e d : C ity is s i c k o a n d s k y is a s m u d g e . "
1st Street Ballad 53
T H E W O R L D A S WI L L A N D W A L L P A P E R
“ Run, William, run in t h e m o r n i n g ! " Fairhair cr ied, a n d s h e ran wh il e William ( c o n f u s e d f ro m t h e night) s hu ff l e d after her. " W e m u s t leave t h e W o o d ? " h e a s k ed . " O f c o u r s e y o u m u s t leave t h e W o o d . You w a n t t o s e e t h e w h o l e w o r l d , so you c a n n o t stay in o n e place. You g o o n , I g o ba ck . No, n o, d o n ' t y o u l ook b a c k o r you'll b e t u r n e d into a s a l t -w o od t r e e . " " St ay with m e , Fairhair." " N o , n o , y ou w a n t variety. I have b e e n with y o u long e n o u g h . 1 have b e e n g u i d e a n d c o m p a n i o n a n d p o n y t o y o u . N o w w e p a rt . ” Fairha¡r w e n t back. William wa s afraid t o l o o k after her. He was in t h e w or l d b e y o n d t h e W o o d B e y o n d t h e World. He n o t i c e d t h o u g h t h a t t h e s t r e e t w as 1st St r e e t a n d n o t 31st Str ee t as h e h a d e x p e c t e d . It was still w o n d e r f u l t o b e a w o r l d travel er, of c o u r s e , b u t n o t q u i t e as w o n d e r f u l as it h ad b e e n o n e o t h e r ti me . T h e n u m b e r of t h e s t r e e t s h o u l d n ' t h a v e m a t t e r e d t o him. William ha d n o t b e e n o n any 1st St r ee t b e f o r e . O r 2 nd. But h e h a d b e e n o n a 3rd S tr ee t b e f o r e o n his f ar t h e s t trip east. S h o u l d h e r e ac h it again o n his f a r th e st trip we st ? T h e w o r ld , h e k n e w ( b e i ng a read¡e w h o h a d r e ad parts of several b o o k s ) , was larger t h a n t hat . He c o u l d n o t have g o n e a r o u n d it in thirty b locks . Still, h e c a m e t o 3rd S t r e e t in g r e a t t r e p i d a t i o n . Ah, it w a s n o t t h e s a m e 3rd S tr ee t he h a d o n c e vis¡ted b e f o r e ; a l m o s t t h e s a m e b u t n o t exactly. An o u n c e of r e a s s u r a n c e was i n t r u d e d into t h e t o n s of alarm in his heavy h e a d . But h e was alive, h e w as well, h e w as still travel ing w e s t in t h e b o u n d l e s s City t h a t is e v e r y w h e r e dif fer ent. " T h e City is vari ed a n d joyful a n d f r e e , " William Mor ri s said boldly, " a n d it is e v e r y w h e r e d i f f e r e n t . " T h e n h e saw Kandy Kalosh a n d h e literally s t a g g e r e d with t h e s h o c k . O n l y it did n o t q u i t e s e e m t o b e s he. "Is y o u r n a m e Kandy Kalosh?" h e a s k e d as qu a k¡ ng ly as a o n e - l e g g e d k a n g a r o o with t h e willies. " T h e last t h i n g I n e e d e d was a t a lk ie ," s h e said. " O f c o u r s e 54
R. A . LAFFERTY
it isn't. My n a m e , w h i c h I h a ve f r om my n a m e - g a m e a n c e s t o r , is C a n d y Ca l a b as h , n o t at all t h e s a m e . " O f c o u r s e it w a s n ' t t h e s a m e . T h e n w h y h a d h e b e e n so alarmed and disappointed? "Will y o u travel w e s t w a r d wi th m e , C a n d y ? " h e a s k ed . "I s u p p o s e so, a little way, if w e d o n ' t h av e t o t a l k ," s h e said. So William Mor ri s a n d C a n d y C al ab ash b e g a n t o t r a ve r se t h e City t h a t was t h e w o r ld . Th ey b e g a n (it w a s n o m o r e t h a n c o i n c i d e n c e ) at a m a r k e r s e t in s t o n e t h a t b o r e t h e w o r d s " B e g i n n i n g of Stencil 35,353," a n d t h e r e a t William w e n t into a s or t of panic. But w h y s h o u l d he? It w a s n o t t h e s a m e stencil n u m b e r at all. T he W o r l d City mi g ht still b e e v e r y w h e r e differ e nt. But William b e g a n t o r u n erratically. C a n d y s t a y e d with him. She w a s n o t a r e a d i e o r a talkie, b u t s h e w a s faithful to a c o m p a n i o n for m a n y bl oc k s . T h e t w o y o u n g p e r s o n s c a m e ten blocks; th ey c am e a d o z e n . T he y a rri ved at t h e 14th S tr ee t W a t e r Ballet a n d w a t c h e d t h e s w i m m e r s . It wa s a l m o s t , b u t n o t q u i t e , t h e s a m e as a n o t h e r 14th S tr e et W a t e r Ballet t h a t William h a d s e e n o n c e . Th e y c a m e to t h e a lg a e - a n d - p l a n k t o n q u ¡ ck - lu n c h p l ac e o n 15th St re et a n d to t h e Will of t h e W o r l d Exhibit Hall o n 16th St reet . Ah, a h o p e f u l e y e c o u l d still pick o u t little d i f f e r e n c e s in t h e h u g e s a m e n e s s . T he W o r l d City h a d to b e e v e r y w h e r e different. T he y s t o p p e d at t h e Cliff-Dweller C o m p l e x o n 17th Street. T h e r e w as an artificial a n t e l o p e t h e r e n o w . William d i d n ' t r e m e m b e r it f r o m t h e o t h e r t i me . T h e r e w a s h o p e , t h e r e was hope. An d s o o n William s aw an o l d e r a n d s o m e h o w m o r e e r e c t m a n w h o w o r e an a r m b a n d with t h e w o r d " M o n i t o r " o n it. He w as n ot t h e s a m e m a n , b u t h e h a d to b e a c l o se b r o t h e r of a n o t h e r m a n t h a t William ha d s e e n t w o days b e f o r e . " D o e s it all r e p e a t itself agai n a n d again a n d a ga in ?" William a s k e d this m a n in g r e at a n g u i s h . " A r e t h e s e c t i o n s of it t h e s a m e o v e r a n d o v e r a ga in ?" 55
T H E W O R L D A S WILL A N D W AL LP APE R
" N o t q u i t e , " t h e m a n said. " T h e g r e a s e ma r ks o n it ar e s o m e t i m e s a little d i ff e r e n t . " " M y n a m e is Wil l i am M o r r i s , " Wi ll iam b e g a n o n c e m o r e bravely. " O h , s ur e. A William Mor r is is t h e e a s ie s t t y p e of all to s p o t , " t h e m a n said. " Yo u sai d— No, a n o t h e r m a n said t h a t my n a m e - g a m e a n c e s t o r h a d t o d o with t h e d e s i g n i n g of a n o t h e r t h i n g b e s i d e s t h e W o o d B e y o n d th e W o r ld ," William s t a m m e r e d . " W h a t w as it?" " W a l l p a p e r , " t h e m a n said. An d William fell d o w n in a f r othy faint. O h , C a n d y d i d n ' t leave him t h e r e . S he w as faithful. She t o o k him u p o n h e r s h o u l d e r s a n d p l o d d e d a l o n g with hi m, o n pas t t h e W e s t Side S h o w S q u a r e o n 18th St reet , pas t t h e MingleM a n g l e a n d t h e Pad Palace, w h e r e s h e ( no, a n o t h e r girl very like her) ha d t u r n e d b a c k b e f o r e , o n a n d o n . "I t' s t h e s a m e t h i n g o v e r a n d o v e r a n d o v e r a g a i n , " William w h i m p e r e d as s h e t o t e d him a long. "Be q u i e t , t a l ki e, " s h e said, b u t s h e said it with s o m e af f ec tion. T he y c a m e t o t h e g r e at C h o p p e r H o u s e o n 20th St reet. C a n d y c ar r ie d William in a n d d u m p e d him o n a b l oc k t h e r e . " H e ' s b e c o m e an a n c i e n t , " C a n d y told an a t t e n d a n t . "Boy, h o w h e ' s b e c o m e an a n c i e n t ! " It w as m o r e t h a n s h e usually t al ked. T h e n , as s h e w as a f a i r - m i n d e d girl a n d as s h e h a d n o t w o r k e d any stint t h a t day, s h e t u r n e d t o a n d w o r k e d an h o u r in t h e C h o p p e r H o u s e . ( Wh a t t h e y c h o p p e d u p in t h e C h o p p e r H o u s e was t h e ancients. ) W h y, t h e r e wa s William's h e a d c o m i n g d o w n t h e line! C a n d y s mi le d at it. S h e c h o p p e d it u p with loving c a r e, m u c h m o r e c a re t h a n s h e usually t o o k . S h e ' d have said s o m e t h i n g m e m o r a b l e a n d kind if s h e ' d b e e n a talkie.
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Violation WILLIAM E NOLAN
It is 2 a . m . a n d h e waits. In t h e cool m o r n i n g stillness of a s i d e st r ee t , u n d e r t h e s c r e e n of t r ee s , t h e ri der waits quietly. At e a s e u p o n t h e w i d e l e a t h e r s e a t of his cycle, g l ov e d finger s r est ing idly o n t h e bars, g o g gl e s u p , e ye s palely reflecting t h e leaf-filtered g l o w o f t h e m o o n . H e l m e t e d . U n i f o r m e d . Waiting. In t h e b r e a t h i n g d ar k t h e cycle metal c oo ls ; t h e m o t o r is silent, p o w e r c o n t a i n e d . T he faint stirrings of a still-sleeping city r e a c h him at his vigil. But h e is n o t c o n c e r n e d with t h e s e ; h e m en t al l y d i smi ss es t h e m . He is o n l y c o n c e r n e d with t h e b r o a d river of s m o o t h c o n c r e t e facing him t h r o u g h t h e t r e e s — a n d t h e g r e at w i n ki n g r ed e y e s u s p e n d e d icicle-like a b o v e it. He waits. A nd t e n s e s t o a s o u n d u p o n t h e river. An e n g i n e s o u n d , m o s q u i t o - d i m with d i s t a nc e , rising t o a h u m . A r u s h i n g s o u n d u n d e r t h e stars. The r ider 's h a n d s c o n t r a c t like t h e claws of a bird. He rises slowly o n t h e b u c k e t seat , right f o o t p o i s e d n e a r t h e starter. A c oi l e d s pr i ng . Waiting. Twin penci l b e a m s of light m o v e t o w a r d hi m, t o w a r d t h e s t r e e t o n w h i c h h e waits h i d d e n . Cl os er . T h e h u m b ui ld s in v o l u m e ; t h e lights a r e very cl os e n ow , flaring c h a l k - w h i t e n e s s a l o n g t h e c o n c r e t e b o u l e v a r d . The ri der 's g o g g l e s a re d o w n a n d h e is r e a d y t o m o v e o u t , m o v e o n t o t h e river. A n o t h e r s e c o n d , p e r h a p s t w o . . . 57
VIOLATION
But no . T he v ehi cl e sl ows, m a k e s a full st op . A s er vi ce vehicl e with t w o m e n inside, l au gh i ng , joking. T h e r i der listens t o t h e m , m o u t h set, e ye s har d. T he v eh i cl e b e g i n s t o m o v e o n c e m o r e . The s o u n d is e a t e n by t h e night. T h e r e is n o violation. N o w . . . t h e relaxing, t h e e a s i ng back. T h e e b b t ide of t e n s i o n r e c e d i n g . C o n e . T he rider q u i e t again u n d e r t h e m o o n . Wait ing. The r e d e y e w i n k i n g at t h e e m p t y b o u l e va r d . " H o w m u c h f ar the r, D av e ?" asks t h e girl. " Te n miles m a y b e . O n c e w e hit W e s t w o o d it's a q u i c k run to my place. Relax. Y o u ' r e n e r v o u s . " " W e s h o u l d h av e s ta ye d o n t h e ma inwa y. U s e d t h e grid. 1 d o n ' t like s u rf a ce s tr eet s. A grid w o u l d have t a k e n us in." T h e m a n smi les, l o o p i n g an a r m a r o u n d h er . " T h e r e ' s n o t h i n g t o b e afraid of so l on g as y o u ' r e c a r ef ul , " h e said. "I u s e d t o drive s ur f ac e s t r e et s all t h e t i m e w h e n I was a boy. Lots of p e o p l e d i d . " The girl swal lows, t o u c h e s at h e r hair ne rv ou sl y. " Bu t t h e y d o n ' t a n y m o r e . P e o p l e u s e t h e grids. I d¡ dn t e v e n k n o w cars still c a m e e q u i p p e d for m a n u a l d r ivi ng. " " T h e y d o n ' t . I ha d this s e t u p by a m e c h a n i c I k n o w . He d o e s j ob s like this for r oa d buffs. It's still legal, driving y o u r o w n c ar — it's just t h a t m o s t p e o p l e h av e lost t h e ha b i t . " The girl p e e r s o u t t h e w i n d o w i nt o t h e silent st re et , s h a k e s h e r h e a d . "I t' s n o t . . . natural. Look o u t t h e r e . N o b o d y ! N ot a n o t h e r car for miles. I feel as if w e ' r e . . . t r e s p a s s i n g . " T he m a n is a n n o y e d . "T ha t' s d a m n n o n s e n s e . I h a v e f r ie nd s w h o d o this all t h e t i me . Just relax a n d e n j o y it. An d d o n ' t talk like an idiot. " "I w a n t o u t , " says t h e girl. "I'll t a k e a w al kw ay b ac k t o t h e gr id." " T h e hell you will," flares t h e m a n. " Y o u ' r e wi th m e t o n i gh t . W e ' r e g o i n g to my p l a c e . " She resists, st r i kes at his face. T he m a n g r a p p l e s t o s u b d u e 58
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h e r — a n d d o e s n o t s e e t h e b li nking light. The car p a s s es u n d e r it swiftly. " N o ! " says t h e m a n . "I w e n t t h r o u g h t h a t light! You m a d e m e miss t h e s t op . I've b r o k e n o n e of t h e s u r f ac e l aws ." He says this n um b ly . " S o w h a t d o e s t h a t m e a n ? " t h e girl asks. " W h a t c o u l d h a p pen?" " N e v e r mi n d. N o t h i n g will h a p p e n . N e v er m i n d a b o u t w h a t c o ul d h a p p e n . " The girl p e e r s o u t into t h e d a r k n e s s . "I still w a n t t o leave this c a r . " " Ju st s h u t u p , " says t h e ma n . A nd k e e p s driving. S o m e t h i n g in t h e s o u n d tells t h e r id er t h a t this o n e will n ot s t o p , t h a t it will c o n t i n u e t o m o v e a l o n g t h e river o f c o n c r e t e d e s p i t e t h e bl inki ng eye. He smi les in t h e d a r k n e s s , lips s t r e t c h e d ba ck , silently. Poised t h e r e o n t h e cycle, with t h e h u m s t e a d y a n d rising o n t h e river, h e feels t h e p o w e r wi t hi n h im a b o u t t o b e r e le a se d . The car is a l m o s t u p o n t h e light, m o v i n g swiftly; t h e r e is n o hint of s l a c k e n e d s p e e d . T he r id er w a t c h e s intently. M an a n d a girl insi de. Struggling. Fighting with o n e a n o t h e r . T he car p a s s e s u n d e r t h e light. Violation. Now! He s p u r s t h e cycle t o met al life; t h e m o t o r c rackl es, roars, e x p l o d e s t h e bl ack m a c h i n e into m o t i o n , a n d t h e rider is away, rolling in m u t e d t h u n d e r a l o n g t h e s tr e et . A r o u n d t h e c o r n e r , s waying, o n t o t h e long, m o o n - p a i n t e d river of t h e b o u l e va r d . The rider feels t h e w i n d in his face, feels t h e t h r o b a n d p o w e r p u l s e o f t h e met al t h i n g h e rides, feels t h e s m o o t h c o n c r e t e r u s h i n g b a c k w a r d u n d e r his w h e e l s . A h e a d : t h e firefly g l o w of tail b e a m s . And n o w his cycle vo i ce cries o u t after t h e m , a siren m o a n 59
VIOLATION
t h r o u g h t h e still s p a c e s of t h e h¡ve-c¡ty. A vo i ce t h a t rises a n d falls in spirals of s o u n d . A nd his cycle eyes, m o u n t e d left a n d right, blink c r i m s o n , red as b l o o d in t h e i r w a k e . T h e ca r will s t o p . T he m a n will s e e hi m, h e a r hi m. T he eyes a n d t h e v oi c e will r ea ch t h e violator. A n d h e will s to p. " G o o d Lo r d ! " t h e m a n says coldly. " W e p i c k e d u p a r ider at t h a t light." " Y o u p i c k ed him u p , I d i d n ' t , " says t h e girl. "It' s y o u r p r o b lem." " B u t I've n e v e r b e e n s t o p p e d o n a s u r f ac e s t r e e t , " t h e ma n says, a n o t e of d e s p e r a t i o n in his voice. "In all t h e s e year s, never o n c e ! " T he girl glares at him. " D a v e , y o u m a k e m e sick. Look at y o u , s h a k i n g like a p u p . Y o u ' r e a d a m n e d p o o r e x c u s e for a man." He d o e s n o t r ea ct t o t h e s e w o r d s . He s p e a k s in a n u m b e d m o n o t o n e . "I c an talk my wa y o u t . I k n o w 1 c an. He'll listen t o m e . I have my rights as a citizen of t h e city— " " H e ' s c a t c h i n g u p fast. Y o u ' d b e t t e r pull o v e r . " "I'll d o t h e talking. You just k e e p q u i e t . I'll h a n d l e th is . " The rider s e e s t h a t t h e car is slo win g, bra ki ng , pulling to t h e c u r b. St o p p i ng . He c ut s t h e siren voic e, lets it di e, glides t h e cycle in b e h i n d t h e car. C ut s t h e e n g i n e . Sits t h e r e for a l o n g m o m e n t o n t h e l e a t h e r seat, pul li ng off his gloves. Slowly. He s e e s t h e car d o o r slide o p e n . A m a n s t e p s o u t , c o m e s t o w a r d him. T h e ri der s w in gs a b o o t e d leg o v e r t h e cycle, s t e p s f ree, a d v a n c i n g t o m e e t this l a w b r e a k e r , fitting t h e g l ove s carefully into his bl ack l e a th e r belt. T he y face e a c h o t h e r , t h e m a n small er , p a u n c h ¡ n g , ba l di ng , face f l u s h e d. T he r ider's p ol i te smile e a s e s t h e m a n ' s t e n s e n e s s . "You in a hurry, sir?" " M e ? No, I'm n ot in a hurry. N o t at all. It w a s just . . . I 60
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d i d n ' t s e e t h e light u p t h e r e until . . . I w a s pas t it. The high t r e e s a n d all. I s w e a r t o y o u I d i d n ' t s e e it. I'd n e v e r kno wi ng ly b r e a k a s ur f ac e law, officer. You have my s w o r n w o r d . " N e r v o us . S h a k e n a n d n e r v o u s , this m a n. The rider can feel t h e m a n ' s guilt, a physical fo rc e. H e e x t e n d s a h a n d . " M a y I s e e y o u r o p e r a t o r ' s l icens e, p l e a s e ? " T h e ma n f u m b l e s in his coat. "I have it right h e r e. It's all in o r d e r , u p to d a t e a n d all." " Just let m e s e e it, p l e a s e . " T h e m a n c o n t i n u e s to talk. " B e e n driving for year s, officer, a n d this is my first violation. Pe rf e ct r e c o r d u p t o n o w. I'm a r e s p o n s i b l e citizen. I o b e y t h e laws. After all, I'm n o t a f o o l. " T he ri der says n o t h i n g ; h e e x a m i n e s t h e m a n ' s l icens e, t aps it t h o u g h t f u l l y a ga ins t his wrist. The r ider's g o g g l e s a r e o p a q u e a n d t h e ma n c a n n o t s e e his e y e s as h e s t u d i e s t h e face of t h e violator. " T h e w o m a n in t h e c ar . . . is s h e y o u r w i f e? " " N o . No, sir. S h e 's . . . a f ri end. Just a f r i e n d . " " T h e n w h y w e r e y o u fighting? I s a w t h e t w o of y o u fighting insi de t h e car w h e n it p a s s e d t h e light. That isn't friendly, is it?" T he m a n a t t e m p t s t o smil e. " P e r s o n a l . W e h a d a small p e r s o n a l d i s a g r e e m e n t . It's all o v e r n o w , b e l ie ve m e . " T h e r id er walks t o t h e car, leans t o p e e r in at t h e w o m a n . She is pale, as n e r v o u s as t h e ma n. " Yo u h aving t r o u b l e ? " t h e r ider asks. Sh e h esi ta te s, s h a k e s h e r h e a d mu t el y. The rider leaves her , r e t u r n s t o t h e m a n , w h o is l ea ni ng a gainst t h e cycle. " D o n ' t t o u c h t h a t , " says t h e ri der coldly, a n d t h e m a n dr a ws b a ck his h a n d , m u m b l i n g an a p ol og y. "I h av e n o f u r t h e r u s e f or t h i s , " says t h e rider, h a n d i n g b ac k t h e m a n ' s l icense. "You ar e guilty of a s ur f ac e - s t r e e t vi ol at io n . " T he m a n q u a k e s ; his h a n d s t r e m b l e . " Bu t . . . it was n o t delib era te. I k n o w t h e law. Y o u 'r e e m p o w e r e d t o m a k e e x c e p t io ns if a violation is n o t d e l i b e r a t e . T h e full p en a lt y is n o t i n v o k e d in s u c h ca se s. I ns t e a d, y ou a r e a l l o w e d t o — " 61
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The r i de r c ut s t h e flow of d e s p e r a t e w o r d s . "You for fei ted y o u r Cit iz en' s Right of Exception w h e n y o u a l l o w e d a pri mary e m o t i o n — a n g e r , in this i n s t a n c e — t o affect y o u r c o nt r ol of a s u r fa c e v ehicl e. T hu s, my d u t y is c le a r. " The m a n ' s e y e s w i d e n in s h o c k as t h e rider b r i n g s u p a belt w e a p o n . " Yo u c a n' t pos si bl y— " "I ' m h e r e b y a u t h o r i z e d t o p e r f o r m this acti on p e r t h e 1990 O v e r p o p u l a t i o n St a tut e wit h r e ga rd to s u rf a ce violators. Your c as e is c l o s e d . " And h e p r e s s e s t h e trigger. Again a n d again a n d again. T h r e e long, p r o b i n g b l u e jets of s t a r - h o t flame leap f r o m t h e w e a p o n in t h e ri der 's h a nd . The m a n is g o n e . T he w o m a n is g o n e . T he c ar is g o n e . The s t r e e t is e m p t y a n d silent. A c h a r r e d smell of dist ant s u n s lingers in t h e m o r n i n g air. T he ri der s t a n ds by his cycle, u n m o v i n g for a l on g m o m e n t . T h e n h e carefully h ol st e rs t h e w e a p o n a n d pulls o n his l eat her gloves. He m o u n t s t h e cycle as it c o m e s to life u n d e r his foot. He is again u p o n t h e m o o n - f l o w i n g b o u l e v a r d , gliding back t o w a r d t h e bl in ki ng r e d eye. The rider r e t u r n s t o his vigil o n t h e small, t r e e - s h a d o w e d s ide st r ee t , t h i n k i n g, H o w s t u p i d t h e y are! To b e s u b j e c t to i n d e c is io n , t o q u a r re l s a n d erratic b e h a v i or . W e a k , all of t h e m , soft a n d w ea k . He smi l es into t h e d a r k n e s s . T he e y e blinks o v e r t h e river. And n o w it is 4 A.M. a n d n o w 6 a n d 8 a n d 10 a n d 1 P.M. a n d n o w it is 3, 4, 5, t h e h o u r s t u r n i n g like s p o k e d w h e e l s , t h e days s p i n n i n g away. An d h e waits. T h r o u g h n i ghts w i t h o u t s l e e p , days w i t h o u t f o o d , a flawless metal e n f o r c e r at his vigil, w a t c h i n g , s u r e of hims e l f a n d of his duty. Waiting.
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City Lights, City Nights K. M. O'DONNELL I O s w a l d s h o o t s K e n n e d y again. K e n ne d y, t h a t idiot, has d e c i d e d for s o m e r e a s o n t o d o this t a k e s t a n d i n g in t h e car. He falls heavily a c r os s Ja c qu e li n e , d i s l od g i ng t h e r os e s, w h i c h c o l l a p se u n d e r n e a t h , e x p l o d i n g petals o n him, a n d O s w a l d , h a p p y for this an y wa y, t h r o w s t h e rifle d o w n five st ori es f ro m Muni ci pa l a n d leaves t h e w i n d o w as I run o u t for t h e m o p - u p . T h e rifle is d e f l e c t e d by a t hi rd -f lo or b a l c o n y o n Munic ipa l a n d mi s s es my e a r by o nl y i n c h es , hitting m e a terrific b l o w o n t h e s h o u l d e r . L u m p e n idiots. T h e y really s h o u l d k n o w t h e g e o m e t r y of this after all t h e t i m e s p e n t blo ck in g . I fall to t h e g r o u n d in pain a n d r ub t h e s h o u l d e r convul si vely until t h e w o r s t r e c e d e s . P e r h a ps I m a k e slightly m o r e of it t h a n it really is. But t h e y m u s t b e t a u g h t a l e ss o n . P r e c au t io n s prevail. They gather a r o u n d me quickly: K ennedy, Jacqueline, J o h n s o n , C onna ll y, t h e se cu ri t y f orces. Even t h o u g h t h e n e c e s sity is to stay in role, I ca n s e e fear h a m m e r i n g at t h e e d g e s of t h e c h a r a ct e r i za t i o n. Sw ea t dr ip s; t h e y a re f r i g h t e n e d . G o o d . It is n e c e s s a r y t h a t t h e y s h o w m e t h e p r o p e r r e s p ec t . After all, if I a m g o i n g t o p e r f o r m t h e a u d i t o r ' s role o v e r a n d o v e r again, t h e y s h o u l d t a k e c ar e with my p e r s o n . " Ar e you all r ight?" K e n n e d y asks. He r un s his h a n d o v e r his jacket , t h e o t h e r h a n d p u m p i n g away in a s id e p o c k e t . Difficult t o b eli eve t h a t he was dyi ng o nl y s e c o n d s a go. He has w o r k e d hi msel f a l m o s t totally o u t of t h e role. Discipline. They m u s t learn discipline. 63
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" G e t t h e hell b ac k t o t h e c ar , " I say o n t h e g r o u n d , still r u b b i n g t h e s h o u l d e r , t h e n s t ag g e r i n g u p w a r d . T he s u n is u n c o m f o r t a b l e , t h e air b i n di ng . M a n h a t t a n m a k e s a very p o o r Dallas; I m u s t r e m i n d t h e m of t ha t. " W h a t a r e yo u wait i ng f or?" I say as t h e y r e ma i n a r o u n d m e . " G e t b a c k t o it." " W e w e r e w o r r i e d , " J a c q u e l i n e says, r u n n i n g a h a n d across my f o r e h e a d . T he fat, s t u pi d b it c h; I c a n n o t b e a r t o b e t o u c h e d . H o w m a n y t i m e s have I t o l d h e r this? I only a l l o w e d h e r to play t h e role b e c a u s e s h e b e g g e d for it; this is t h e r e s p o n s e I get. Sh e is n o a ct r es s. K e n n e d y is n o act or . N o n e o f t h e m , e x c e p t for O s w a l d , h ave a n y c o n c e p t i o n of p r of e ss io n al is m. It is O s w a l d w h o joins us n o w . At a d e a d r un f ro m Muni cipal h e c o m e s t o w a r d m e , f e e t clattering. He has s e e n t h e rifle, n o w h e s e e s t h e m g a t h e r e d a r o u n d m e , t h e c o n c e r n o n t he ir f aces, t h e way t h a t I a m h o l d i n g my s h o u l d e r , a n d h e u n d e r s t a n d s w h a t has h a p p e n e d . He is a ma n of m o d e r a t e sensitivity, unl ike t h e rest of t h e m , w h o a re l u mp s . I d o n o t really k n o w w h a t h e is d o i n g in this g r o u p b u t it is p r o b a b l y u n w i s e to s p e c u l a t e : at least h e is a r o u n d . W e r e it n o t for him, t h e r e e n a c t m e n t s w o u l d b e a c o m p l e t e fiasco. " Ar e y o u all r ight?" h e says, s t o p p i n g s o m e f eet f r om m e , b a c k e d off f ro m t h e o t h e r s , still l o c k e d into t h e role, w h i c h is g o o d . He k n o w s he s h o u l d feel t he ir r e p u d i a t i o n , b e in flight. At this m o m e n t , in fact, h e s h o u l d a lr ea dy b e half a mile away, s p r i n ti n g t o w a r d t h e poli ce car. "I g u e s s y o u ' r e all right. "I a m , " I say, t u r n i n g f r o m him n o w t o face t h e o t h e r s , w h o are a lr e ad y in s catt er , a nt ic ipa ti ng. " G e t o n with it!" I s h o u t . " C a n ' t y ou d o a n y t h i n g right? D o n ' t yo u have a ny s e n s e , a ny disci pli ne, any p r o f e s s i o n a l i s m ? " The s a m e old p o in t le s s rant. 1 a m sick of h e a r i n g it myself b u t at least it wo r k s . They shuffle b ac k t o t h e cars, t h e g r o u n d s , var ious p os i t io n s . W e a re a lr ea dy three minutes behind schedule. F o r a m o m e n t I t h i n k of c a n ce l in g , telling t h e m off a n d striking ' t h e s et until t h e a f t e r n o o n , b u t t h e y have w o r k e d so har d u p to this p o i n t t ha t it is really n o t fair, a n d t h e r e are also cert ai n n o t e s given t h e m t h e last t i m e t h a t 1 m u s t r e i n f or c e in run64
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t h r o u g h o r lose f or ev e r. T h e hell wi t h it t h e n . "Let' s g o , " I say, raising my h a n d , a n d t h e y s e e m e in t h e s u n ; t h e y s e e m e s t a n d i n g t h e r e , s e e t h e p o w e r c o m i n g f ro m t h a t h a n d , a n d t h e cars b e g in t o m o v e . Sirens start. O s w a l d is a l re a dy g o n e ; it is n o t i m p o s s i b l e t h a t h e will r et r ieve all of t h e lost t i me . I pick my p a d f r om t h e p l ac e w h e r e I h a d d r o p p e d it a n d , t a ki ng t h e p e n f r o m my p o c k e t , c o n t i n u e my o b s e r v a t i o n s . L ocked wi thi n directorial d e t a c h m e n t again it is as if n o n e of this is h a p p e n i n g n o w b u t has a lr e ad y h a p p e n e d a l on g t i me a go , in a S o u t h w e s t e r n city, fifty-three year s a g o n ext T h u rs d ay , a l re a dy f r o z en into artifact a n d h o w m u c h l o n g e r c an I p u t u p with t h e i r i n c o m p e t e n c e ?
II Later, with Lara, I try t o relax. S h e is t h e o nl y o n e of t h e players w h o m I will call by h e r real n a m e , e v e n in t h e s e n o t e s , w h i c h a r e s u p p o s e d t o b e co n f i d e nt ia l a n d w h i c h a r e t o b e o p e n e d by t h e O u t s i d e r s o nl y d e c a d e s after t h e fact, 2050 o r s o m e t h i n g like t ha t, it is difficult t o k e e p t r a ck o f e ve ryt hi ng . U nder the arrangements I am com pelled to keep these notes; actually I w o u l d r a t h e r n o t b o t h e r . Lara pl a ye d Mrs. C o n n a ll y t o d a y ; I h av e s hi ft ed h e r t o all of t h e f e m i n i n e roles, e v e n in an o u t r a g e o n c e to J a c q u e l i n e , b u t t h e s e e n a c t m e n t s d o n o t suit h e r quali ties, w h a t e v e r t h e y are. S h e b e c o m e s f r o z en at critical t im es , p o s t u r e s aimlessly, s o m e t i m e s lets h e r s e n t i m e n t s o v e r c o m e h e r t o t h e p o i n t w h e r e s h e c a n n o t f u n ct i o n at all. A b a d a ct re ss , in s h o r t , a l t h o u g h s h e has abilities of a n o t h e r sort. " D o n ' t y o u e v e r g e t ti red of t h is ?" s h e asks, h e r h e a d n o w l e a n e d a cr os s my legs in a p o s t u r e of relaxation, h e r h a n d s r a t h e r aiml essly p r o d d i n g my t hi gh s, slivers of s e n s a t ion t r aveli ng to m e t ha t way, a l t h o u g h I a m n o t t o b e m o v e d by a ny of t h e m . Even by her. They suit limited p u r p o s e s , is all. "I w o u l d t h i n k t h a t y o u ' r e g e t t i n g b o r e d . " "I a m n o t g e t t i n g b o r e d . I n e v e r g e t b o r e d . It's w o r k , t ha t' s all it is. D o n ' t w o r r y a b o u t my f e e li n g s . " "All r i g ht , " s h e says in a mollifying way, i n c re a si n g t h e rh yt hm 65
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of h e r st r ok in g, as if this c o u l d affect m e , " y o u d o n ' t have t o lose y o u r t e m p e r . I was o n l y a s ki ng . " "I di d n o t lose my t e m p e r . I n e v e r lose my t e m p e r . " "I d o n ' t u n d e r s t a n d w h y y ou w a n t t o d o this. I c an s e e e v e r y t h in g els e a n d w h a t y o u mi g h t b e trying t o d o , b u t n o t w h a t y o u ' r e g e tt i n g o u t of it. W h a t c o u l d y ou p o s s i b l e h av e to gain f r o m t his, e v e n in sat isf acti on?" Lara is t h e m o s t intel l igent of t h e m a n d t h e onl y o n e with w h o m I c a n m a n a g e s o m e informality b u t s h e t o o is dis as tr ous l y s t u p i d , like t h e rest, a n d I p er c ei ve , n o t for t h e first t i me , t h e h o p e l e s s n e s s of o u r r e la t io n s hi p. " S t o p it," I say. "I d o n ' t w a n t t o d is c us s it a n y m o r e . It's w o r k , t ha t 's all it is, a n d w h e n t h e da y is o v e r, o n e can g o o n t o o t h e r t hi ng s. Y o u 'r e h e r e at y o u r o w n r e q u e s t , y o u k n o w . " This is n o t a p l e a s a n t t h i n g t o say b u t h e r i n c e s sa n t q u e s t i o n i n g d i s t u r b s m e m o r e at s o m e t i me s t h a n at o t h e r s a n d t h e r u n - t h r o u g h t o d a y b r o u g h t m e t o a p o i n t of u n d e r s t a n d i n g I h a d e v a d e d b e f o r e ; it is really q u i t e h o p e l e s s . Th ey will n e v e r b e a bl e t o d o it right a n d w e ar e m o v i n g f u r t h e r f r om t r u e e ff e ct iv en e ss all t h e t i me . It is p o s s ib l e t h a t o n t h e s e c o n d r u n - t h r o u g h , n o real p r e p a r a t i o n s , j ust a s e t of n o t e s a n d a q u i c k e n a c t m e n t after t h e i r initial familiarization, t h e y did as well as t h e y e v e r can a n d f r om h e r e o n in it ca n on ly b e c o m e w o r s e , c o m p l e t e l y me c h a n i c al . T h r e e m o r e days h e r e a n d o u t ; it will all b e o ve r, b u t w h a t have I l e a rn e d? I will learn n o t h i n g ; this is t h e t r a ge dy . " G o , " I say, i n f l a me d by p i q u e a n d o t h e r e m o t i o n s , "if y ou have n o t h i n g e ls e t o say, just g o . " "If y o u w a n t , " s h e says, lolling t o t h e o t h e r s id e, pi cki ng h er se lf away fr om m e in o n e g e s t u r e a n d o p e n i n g g r o u n d . "If y ou w a n t m e t o , I will; it's y o u r c h o i c e , y o u k n o w . W h y w o n ' t y ou e v e r talk t o us? W h y w o n ' t y ou a n s w e r my q u e s t i o n s ? O n c e I t h o u g h t it w as b e c a u s e y o u h a d y o u r r e a s o n s b u t n o w ^ I'm b e g i n n i n g to b e afraid t h a t it's onl y b e c a u s e y o u h av e n o a n s w e r s . Do y o u really w a n t m e t o g o ? " I r ea ch for h er . My c a r d i o va s c u l ar a n d s y m p a t h e t i c n e r v o u s s y s t e m s have b e e n i m m o b i l i z e d previousl y, this b e i n g o n e of 66
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t h e r e q u i r e m e n t s b e f o r e e n t r a n c e t o t h e city, b u t I feel a d is ta nt , u nc o il i n g r e s p o n s e , m o r e d e p e n d e n t u p o n m e m o r y t h a n c o n n e c t io n . “ N o , " I say, “ I d o n ' t w a n t y ou t o g o . " C u n n i n g , c u n n i n g , s h e r et re at s a n d h o l d s h er se lf b e f o r e m e with n e w a s s u r a n c e . " T h e n y ou m u s t tell m e , " s h e says, " t h e real t r u t h of w h y y ou a re h e r e a n d p u t t i n g us t h r o u g h t h e s e p e r f o r m a n c e s . No o n e O u t s i d e e v e n k n o w s t h a t w e exist a n y m o r e a n d yet y o u c o m e h e r e for t h e s e r e he ar s a ls . You m u s t tell— " " N o , " I say, g e t ti n g t o my f eet , st al king f r o m h e r in o n e m o t i o n , " n o , t h e r e is n o m o r e . You m u s t g o, Lara." Stri cken, s h e h o l d s t o place. " You m u s t tell me . O t h e r w i s e I can't go o n — " " Yo u will go o n , " I say. "You will g o o n as l o n g as it is n e c e s s a r y a n d t h e n f u r t h e r ye t b e c a u s e this is w h a t I w a n t y ou t o d o . W h e n it is e n d e d yo u will have y o u r e x p l an a ti o n b u t n o t until t h e n a n d I will say n o m o r e . " " Yo u t h i n k t h a t y ou ca n c o nt r o l u s , " s h e says quietly. "You t h i n k t ha t b e c a u s e y o u ' r e f ro m t h e O u t s i d e a n d w e t h e l u m p e n of t h e city y o u c an m a k e us d o a n yt h i n g y o u w a n t b e c a u s e of y o u r a u t h o r i t y b u t y o u d o n ' t — " " A n d c a n' t I?" I say, l oo k i n g at her. An attractive girl b u t a m o r p h o u s at t h e e d g e s , filled wit h small s h a d i n g s t o w a r d d a r k n e ss a n d d e a d in t h e c e n t e r as all of t h o s e left in t h e city are. S h e c a n n o t t o u c h m e ; it m e a n s n o t h i n g . " C a n ' t I?" I ask again. S h e looks at t h e g r o u n d , s h a k e s h e r h e a d , says n o t h i n g . R u m b l e of s t o n e s a b o v e ; s y m p a t h e t i c c o l l a p se of g r e at s t r u c t u r e s in t h e d is t a n c e . T h e city is falling always as w e w o r k t h r o u g h o u r rituals. N o w , le a di ng h e r f r o m t h e small e n c l o s e d pl ace in t h e Battery w h e r e w e h av e b e e n , I c an s e e t h e d e s t r u c t ion again. Ani mal s w h i s k invisibly t h r o u g h t h e park; I feel h e r h a t r e d as if s t r u n g t h r o u g h m e by fine wi re s filled with e xp lo si ve s a n d t h e s c e n t of g a sol ine . "Yes, I c a n , " I say, a n s w e r i n g my q u e s t i o n , a n d so d e e p a m I in t h e s p e c u l a t i o n this s ets off w h e n I say it t h a t I d o 67
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n o t n o t i c e w h e n Lara leaves. If s h e has left. If s h e Is still b e s i d e m e it m a k e s n o d i f f e r e n c e ; I a m w r a p p e d in di rectorial c o n t e m plation. Ill I did n o t t h i n k it w o u l d b e t his c o m p l e x . I e n v i s i o n e d it as a s i m p l e p r o c e s s , an a s s e m b l a g e of l u m p e n glad t o c o o p e r a t e with a d i r e c t o r f r om t h e O u t s i d e ( b e c a u s e , by i n f e r e n c e , it mi gh t b e t h e only e s c a p e of t h e i r o w n ) , a f e w r e h e ar s a l s, logis tics, g e o m e t r y , line r e a d i n g s a n d b lo c k i n g a d j u s t m e n t s h e r e and there, and then the crews would be s u m m o n e d , do the filming in o n e t a k e a n d t h a t w o u l d b e t h e e n d of it. I w o u l d b e o u t of this a c c u r s e d pl ace, a n d o n t a p e w o u l d r e p o s e my m a s t e r p i e c e o r, if n o t my m a s t e r p i e c e , cer tai nl y an i n t e r e s t i n g i de a strikingly p u t t o g e t h e r . A u d i t or s c o u l d ha rd ly fail to s e e t h e originality of it a n d w o u l d give high ma r ks for au da ci ty if n o t e x e c u t i o n . A grisly historical e v e n t — it has b e e n o n e of my m i n o r i nt er es t s for s o m e t i m e n o w — r e - e n a c t e d a n d b r o u g h t b a c k t o t h e s e n s e o f its original g r u b b i n e s s by a ca st of l u m p e n playing in t h e l a n d s c a p e of t h e city! Yes, it w o u l d h av e all w o r k e d o u t if it ha d o nl y b e e n t h a t s impl e. T h e gr i mi ne s s , t h e i n c on gr ui t y , t h e s h e e r i n c o m p e t e n c e s u r r o u n d i n g t h o s e bi za rr e e v e n t s w h i c h b e c o m e p a r t o f o u r c o m m o n ( u n k n o w n ) history w o u l d h av e b e e n fully r e c o n s t i t u t e d t h r o u g h my p r o c es s, a n d t h e insi ghts t h u s g a i n e d w o u l d have raised t h e p o p u l a r a w a r e n e s s c o n s i d e r a b l y o r , if n o t t ha t, at least t h e a w a r e n e s s of t h e C o m m i t t e e t h r o u g h w h i c h all p r oj e ct s of this n a t u r e m u s t go in partial ful fil lment of, etc. But t h e simplicity of my vision has always b e e n c o n t r a d i c t e d by an o v e r w h e l m i n g b r e a k d o w n in c a r r y - t h r o u g h ; I h av e h a d n o l uck is a n o t h e r way of p u t t i n g it, o r p o s s i b l y t h e w o r d I a m s c r a m b l i n g f o r is “ f o r e s i g h t , " a n d it n e v e r o c c u r r e d t o m e , s o m e h o w , t h a t t h e l u m p e n w o u l d , m o s t of t h e m anywa y, b e di smally u n t a l e n t e d , s o m e of t h e m barely a b l e t o r e a d t h e lines of t h e scripts, let a l o n e play t h e m wit h c on v i c t io n . I s h o u l d h av e k n o w n it! 1 k n o w I s h o u l d h av e k n o w n it b u t 68
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o n e t e n d s t o r o m a n t i c i z e, at least in t h e a bs t r ac t, t h e s e l u m p e n j ust as all st ri cken c r e a t u r e s m u s t b e r o m a n t i c i z e d by intellectual t y p e s s u c h as myself: s t u r d y survivors of an e r a, u r b a n artifacts, l o n e h a n g e r s - o n , exiles in t o r m e n t a n d s o o n . W h o k n e w w h a t v eins of conv i ct i o n a n d e n e r g y I w o u l d tap? a n d s o o n . . . b u t w h a t I did n o t s e e (until it c o n f r o n t e d m e in all of its w o n d r o u s a n d f o r t h ri g ht simplicity) was t h a t t h e l u m p e n w e r e w h a t t h e y w e r e for g o o d r e a s o n ; o nl y a t e n t h of t h e m at be s t a re in t h e city by c h o i c e , t h e r e m a i n d e r e i t h e r t h e r e by r el a ti on s h i p o r in p en al ty o r for r e a s o n s of idiocy ( wh a t el se c o u l d v o l u n t a r y e l ec t ion of t h e city be?) a n d t h e five t o t e n year s t h a t is t h e a v e r a g e t i m e s p e n t h e r e has b r u t a l i z e d t h e m all, e v e n t h e least of t h e m , t o t h e level of little m o r e t h a n pigs w h o after r o o t i n g a r o u n d in b a d g r o u n d s for y e a rs w o u l d n o t e v e n r e c o g n i z e g o o d h y d r o p o n i c s w h e n t h e y sni f fed it. By t h e s e t e r m s Lara is in r e d u c tio as well; my f ee li ngs for h e r a r e barely m o r e e l e v a t e d t h a n for a n y of t h e o t h e r s (it is o n l y t h e instinct for lust t h a t k i nd l e d my i nt er e st , t h e d e s i r e t o f u n c t i o n d e s p i t e t h e c i r c u i t r y w h i c h b l o c k s t h i s ) , a n d w h a t s h e s ays t o m e , s t r i p p e d of e m o t i o n a l c o n t e n t , c o m e s d o w n t o t h e s a m e c o m plaints t h a t I ha ve h e a r d f r om all t h e o t h e r s : w e a k snuffl¡ngs of r e s e n t m e n t d i s g u i s e d as r egr et , a n d b e y o n d t ha t, s t up e fy in g i n c o m p r e h e n s i o n . I c a n n o t s t a n d it a n y m o r e . All of t h e m a r e getting worse. W o r s e : t h e y a r e n o t e v e n at t h e level w h e r e I h a d t h e m t w o days a g o a n d n o w t i m e is a l m o s t over . Like it o r n o t t h e t e c h n i c i a n s will b e in t o m o r r o w for t h e t a p i n g a n d t h e s h o w will t h e n b e s tr uc k. O s w a l d s i m p e r i n g , K e n n e d y e f f e m i n a t e, C o n n a l l y pal sied a n d with s t r a n g e at tacks of t e m p e r t h a t c a u s e his f ace t o s u f f us e as h e f o r ge t s his lines. I r e f u s e t o call t h e m by n a m e s a ny o t h e r t h a n t h e s e ; t h e y exist t o m e onl y in t e r m s of t h e roles t h e y h av e b e e n a s s i g n e d — o r w o u l d s o exist if t h i n gs w e r e g o i n g satisfactorily— a n d will n o t b e dignifi ed by a ny o t h e r t e r m . T he y ar e l u m p e n , Lara as well, a n d t h e w o r s t of t h e m b e c a u s e s h e has t h e p r e s u m p t i o n t o t h i n k t ha t s h e u n d e r s t o o d me . 69
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Miser ably: it is g o i n g mi serabl y. O s w a l d levels t h e rifle, n a r r o ws d o w n t h e sight, a n d e v e n f ro m this d i s t a n c e I i ma gi ne t h a t I c a n s e e t h e lines of i n v o l v e m e n t w o r k i n g small c r os s e s a n d h a t c h ma rk s a c r os s his f ace— t h e b a d a c to r 's m e t h o d of w o r k i n g hims el f into a role only t h r o u g h grief o r r age r e c ol l e c t e d — b u t e v e n as K e n n e d y h u d d l e s in t h e car, m o v i n g darkly t o w a r d J a cq u e l i n e , a little clot o n t h e c u s h i o n i n g n o w , b u r r o w ing h i ms e lf into an a n gl e for t h e s h o t , I s e e t h a t it will n o t w o r k , t h e s y n c h r o n i z a t i o n is off. An d t o c o m p o u n d t h e di sast er, t h e o l d c ar l e a d i n g t h e m o t o r c a d e m u s t t h r o w a p i s t o n o r s o m e t h i n g ; it c o m e s t o a s t o p with a s c r e a m a n d f r o m t ha t car leap t h e S e c r et Service detail c ur s in g. T h e y m a k e h a n d sig nals t ha t t h e m o t o r c a d e is t o s t o p b u t t h e cars b e h i n d d o n o t s e e t h e m o r s e e t h e m qui ckl y e n o u g h a n d t h e cars pile u p o n o n e a n o t h e r with a seri es of dull t h u d s , onl y t h e i r e x t r e m e low s p e e d giving a c er tai n c o m i c int ensi ty t o t h e p e r f o r m a n c e . K e n n e d y sways o u t of t h e car w i pi ng his f o r e h e a d , t h e a g e nt s s u r r o u n d hi m, J a c q u el i n e h o l d s an e l b o w . From this d i s ta n ce I s e e Lara, t h e onl y o n e of t h e m with pr of es si on a l di sci pl ine, still at rest q ui e tly in t h e car, h e r h a n d s f o l d e d , l o c ke d in t h e role. S h e is wa i ti ng for t h e m o t o r c a d e t o r e s u m e . T he o t h e r s a re g e s t u r i n g at o n e a n o t h e r , talking in p r o g r e s si v el y l o u d e r v oi c es, a n d O s w a l d d i s a p p e a r s f r om t h e w i n d o w t o r un c l a t te r ing d o w n flights of t h e Mu ni ci pa l t o join t h e m . Th e r u n - t h r o u g h has b e e n r u i n e d . T he y d o n o t e v e n l o ok at m e as I c o m e t o w a r d t h e m gesti culat ing, r ant ing, s l a p p i n g t h e n o t e s in my h a n d s . I a m n o t s u r e of this b u t h av e a c er tai n i nti ma tion of l au gh te r, as if all t h e t i m e t h e y c o o p e r a t e d with m e o nl y unwillingly a n d ar e n o w fr ee t o s h o w t h e i r c o n t e m p t . It is t h e e n d , t h e e n d of it; my last r e se r v e of c o n t a i n m e n t is e m p t i e d as I c o m e t o w a r d t h e m a n d I reali ze— f r o m l on g k n o w l e d g e — t h a t I a m o n t h e v e r g e of a s e r i o u s loss of c o nt r o l , s o m e t h i n g t h a t I s h o u l d b e u n a b l e to risk in this c o n t e x t b u t it is t o o late t o talk qui et ly t o myself in r e a s o n a b l e t o n e s , small w h i s p e r s o f a s s u r a n c e . " G o d d a m n i t ! " I s c r e a m at t h e m . " G o d d a m n y ou all! C a n ' t y o u d o a n y t h i n g right? D o n ' t a ny 70
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of y o u u n d e r s t a n d w h a t ' s g o i n g o n h e r e ? I c a n ' t s t a n d it; I c a n ' t s t a n d this a n y m o r e . W e ha d o nl y t h r e e days t o g e t this t h i n g right a n d n o w y o u ' v e r u i n e d e ve ry t hi ng ? D og s , pigs! You d e s e r v e t o b e in t h e city! O n c e I t o o k pity o n y ou b u t t hat was b e f o r e I c a m e t o k n o w w h a t y ou are! You a re i n c o m p e t e n t ; t h e r e is n o t h i n g y ou c a n d o in t e r m s of y o u r lives b e c a u s e y o u ar e i nc a p a b l e of r u n n i n g t h e m ! " a n d so o n a n d so forth. I a m really q u i t e o u t of c o nt r ol a n d it is p o in tl e ss t o a b u s e t h e l u m p e n so b e c a u s e t h e i r c o n d i t i o n a l o n e is r e t r i b ut i o n a nd a b u s e m e a n s n o t h i n g . I k n o w this. N e v e r t h e l e s s , I c a n n o t s to p. " T h r e e d ays t o g e t a s i m p le s c e n e s t a g e d a n d t a p e d a n d y o u ' v e r u i n e d it all!" I s h o u t . " Y o u ' v e r u i n e d e v e r y t h i n g . " I realize t h a t I a m n o t b e i n g e nt ir el y fair b e c a u s e t h e l u m p e n h av e r u i n e d n o t h i n g for t h e m s e l v e s — t he ir lives a r e a l ready en t ir el y r u i n e d — b u t on ly for me , t h e d i r e c t or , t h e s c h e d u l i n g , t h e ne c es s i ti e s. N e v e r t h e l e s s , I c a n n o t c o n t r o l myself, flinging my n o t e s n o w t o t h e g r o u n d , w h e r e t h e w i n d s of t h e Battery p r o m p t l y w h is k in t o s c a t te r t h e m o n t h e r u i n e d c l u m p s of e a rt h. " H o w , " I say, " h o w a m I e v e r g oi n g t o g e t a n y w h e r e with t h is ?" "I t isn't o u r f aul t, " K e n n e d y says. His e ye s a r e p er s ua s iv e , at least t o m e ; I still a c c e p t him in t h e role. " N o b o d y h e r e w a n t e d t o d o this. W e o f f e r e d o u r servi ces as a favor t o you. We've d o n e the best we can." " Th a t' s r i g h t ," says Co nna lly. Texan, dif fi dent , h e slides a h a n d into a p o c k e t , looks at m e with t o r m e n t e d little eyes. "You m a d e us d o this. W e h ad n o t h i n g t o d o with it at all." " W e ' r e d o i n g t h e b e s t w e c a n , " K e n n e d y says. " W e have n o i dea w h a t y ou w a n t . It's u p to you t o tell u s . " "R i g h t , " C o nn a l l y says, " t h a t ' s right. If y o u d o n ' t like w h a t w e ' r e d o i n g it's n o t o u r fault b u t y o u r s b e c a u s e w e d i d n ' t w a n t to d o it in t h e first p l a c e . " " T h e y ' r e b o t h r i gh t, " J o h n s o n says, s tri di ng o v e r to us. Of all t h e principals h e is t h e m o s t p oo r l y cast, b e i n g a dwarfi sh m a n with stiff h a n d s , a n d n o t a le n t for g e s t u r e at all, b ut t h e first directorial i m p u l s e is o f t e n t h e c o r r e c t o n e o r at least 71
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s o I wa s t a u g h t in t h e final s e m i n a r s a n d I w as c o n v i n c e d t h a t h e w o u l d b e a bl e t o w o r k his way t h r o u g h t h e part. I was w r o n g a b o u t him, h o w e v e r . I w as w r o n g a b o u t all of t h e m . "I w as w r o n g a b o u t all of y o u , " I say. Frustrati on m a k e s m e r as h; m o m e n t a r i l y at least I m u s t f o r g e t w h e r e 1 a m , t h e n a t u r e of t h e p e o p l e with w h o m I a m dea li ng . " Y o u ' r e all w o r t h l e s s , " I say, "all of y o u . You pity y o u r s e l v e s a n d w o r k o n y o u r small r e s e n t m e n t s a n d h a t r e d s a n d b l a m e e v e r y b o d y b e c a u s e y o u ' r e n o t o n t h e O u t s i d e a n d t h e y call y o u l u m p e n b u t t h e fact is t h a t y o u a re l u m p e n , n o t h i n g e ls e b u t t ha t, a n d y o u all d e s e r v e t o b e h e r e . Every o n e of y o u . Yo u ' ve m a d e y o u r lives a n d y o u h a v e n o r i g h t t o c o m p l a i n a b o u t e v e r y t h i n g b e c a u s e it's all y o u r fault. You d is g u s t m e , " I say. I a m s h a ki ng . "All of y o u d i s gu s t m e . " Lara is o u t of h e r car n o w , t o u c h i n g m e o n t h e e l b o w a n d in t h a t t o u c h I feel q u i ve r in g . " P l e a s e , " s h e says t o t h e rest of t h e m . I d o n o t k n o w w h a t s h e is t al ki ng a b o u t . " H e ' s n o t in his right m i n d . H e 's ver y y o u n g a n d t h e r e ' s s o m u c h h e d o e s n ' t u n d e r s t a n d . He d o e s n ' t e v e n k n o w w h a t h e ' s saying. Please leave him a l o n e . " "L ea ve m e a l o n e ? " I say, n o t c o m p r e h e n d i n g . " W h y s h o u l d t h e y leave m e a l o n e ? Th e y ' v e r u i n e d e v e r y t h i n g for t h e t a pi n g ; why should they desert me?" " Yo u d o n ' t r e a l i ze , " Lara says to m e , " w h a t ' s g o i n g o n h e r e . You d o n ' t u n d e r s t a n d h i m , " s h e says t o t h e o t h e r s . " P l e a s e n o w , let m e talk t o him. I'm s u r e t h a t I c an m a k e him s e e if you'll o n l y give m e t i m e . " But it is t o o late for this, a n d finally I b e c o m e a w a r e of w h a t is g o i n g o n . T h e y c los e a b o u t m e n o w : J o h n s o n , K e n ne d y, Conally, t h e S e c r et Servi ce a g e n t s . Even O s w a l d , with a d e m e n t e d l ook sett ling into his f e a t u r e s , has j o i n e d t h e m , a n d I feel t h e p re ss of b o d i e s , t h e b e g i n n i n g of e n c l o s u r e ; s c e n t a high, p e n e t r a t i n g smell t h a t c an onl y c o m e f r o m my o w n 1 gl an d s. 1 feel t h e i r p r e s s u r e a ga in st m e . " N o w s t o p t h i s , " I say. "This is ri di cu l ou s. It's o nl y a play, a r e - e n a c t m e n t , a s i mp l e r u n - t h r o u g h f or r e s e a r c h i n g p u r p o s e s a n d if y o u d o n ' t s e e that— " 72
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" W e s e e , " O s w a l d says t o m e . " W e s e e w h a t w e n e e d to s e e . " An d th ei r h a n d s a r e o n m e n o w . I feel t h e d r e a d c o n t a c t o f b o d i e s , t h e actual s e n s e o f c o n n e c t i o n filling m e with a r e vul sion as p u r e as I have e v e r k n o w n , t h e reality of t h o s e b o d i e s , a n d t h e n I feel myself t a k e n away f r o m t h e r e in a s t r u g gling kind o f f as h io n b u t pas t t h e first s t r u gg l e s I c a n d o n o t h i n g whatsoever. "L ar a ," I cry, "Lara, tell t h e m t o s t o p this. It's im po ss i b l e . T he y c a n ' t d o it t o m e , a n d an ywa y, w h e n t h e c r e w s c o m e in a n d s e e t hi s— " " O u r l aws, " s o m e o n e says, " a r e n o t y o u r laws, h e r e in t h e city." A n d t h e n I s e e w h e r e t h e y a re t a k i ng m e . D o o r s o p e n , I a m t h r u s t i nto a s ma l le r a re a, a rising s t e n c h c o n f r o n t s m e , old metal a n d ga te s s w i n g o p e n a n d I a m e s c o r t e d within. T h e o ld T o m b s . "I c a n ' t d o a n y t h i n g , " Lara says, "it' s all y o u r o w n fa ul t. " My h e a d strikes a bar, I s t a gg e r, fall a n d s e e n o m o r e for a while. W h e n I r e t u r n t o myself, I a m i n c a r ce ra t e d. IV In t h e cell, I s o o n realize t h a t it is u s el e ss t o s tr ug g l e a n d h u n c h mysel f a ga i ns t a wall, k n e e s d r a w n u p in a fetal po si tio n, staring, listlessly I s u p p o s e , a l t h o u g h I a m mercifully u n a w a r e of my o w n facial e x p r e s s i o n s , at t h e small sprays a n d d o t s of light t ha t s c a t te r t h r o u g h t h e o n e b a r r e d w i n d o w t o o high o t h e r w i s e t o p r o v i d e m e p e r s p e c t i v e . In a c o r n e r o p p o s i t e a re a c u p of w a t e r , a f e w slices of b r e a d , p u r e f o o d f r o m t h e city, o nl y slightly m a r r e d by dirt, a n d I s u p p o s e t h a t I s h o u l d m a k e t h e eff or t t o h a ve s o m e , n o t only b e c a u s e I m u s t k e e p my s t r e n g t h up , b u t b e c a u s e in leaving this t h e y a r e s h o w i n g o b v i o u s c o n s i d e r a t i o n of w h i c h I o u g h t , by right, t o p a r t a k e. But it is t o o m u c h of an eff or t to r e a d j u s t myself a n d g o o v e r to t h a t o p p o s i t e c o r n e r , s o m e t e n t o fifteen f e e t f ro m h e r e , m u c h e as i e r t o simply sprawl a n d let t h e i m p r e s s i o n s o v e r t a k e me. It is q u i e t in w h a t r e m a i n s of t h e T o m b s , q u i e t a n d isol at ed a n d a g o o d pl ac e t o d o s o m e t h i n k i n g if o n e w e r e i n t e r e s t e d in t h o u g h t ; n e v e r a c o n t e m p l a t i v e t y p e , I p r e f e r t o leave t h e 73
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i m p r e s s i o n s s ub v o c a l. It w a s i n s ane t o c o m e into t h e city. I n sa ne t o c o m e into t h e city f r o m w h i c h m o s t of us have b e e n t r a i n e d f r om t h e b e g i n n i n g t o flee, crazier yet t o involve t h e l u m p e n in a p r o je c t of this t y p e — h o w c o u l d t h e y u n d e r s t a n d it?— b u t w h e r e els e was I likely to find c h e a p l y t h e partici p an ts n e c e s s a r y for t h e p roject ? Professi onal a c t or s w o u l d have b e e n n e c e s s a r y O u t s i d e , a ct or s a n d s p a c e , a n d I did n o t have t h e m e a n s t o hire. T he l u m p e n w e r e k n o w n t o b e su b mi ss i ve a n d w o u l d n o t my quickl y a c q u i r e d cast t hi n k t h a t c o o p e r a t i o n in t h e p r o j e c t mi g ht b e a m e a n s of m a k i n g t he ir way into t h e O u t s i d e ? N or did I e v e r mi slead t h e m ; I m a d e n o p r o m i s e s . Simply e n o u g h , I did n o t calcul at e for t he ir s t r a n g e n e s s , s t u p i d ity a n d v i o l e n c e , a n d this m a k e s m e a fool. Lara a p p e a r s at t h e g at e a n d , p u t t i n g h e r h a n d s o n t h e bars, l eans i nw ar d , a l o n e. "Ar e y ou all r ight?" s h e asks. From this a s p e c t s h e s e e m s m o r e attractive t h a n I have e ve r s e e n he r b u t I k n o w their irretrievable c o rr u p tio n n o w and am n ot t e m p t e d by feeling. "Leave m e a l o n e , " I say, " o r ge t m e o u t of h e r e . N o t h i n g else." " P l e a s e , " s h e says, " y o u m u s t listen t o m e . You n e v e r lis tened." "I h av e n o t h i n g to s a y. " " P l e a s e , " s h e says. Is s h e w e e p i n g ? "T h ey a r e very angry. They feel t ha t y ou h av e u s e d a n d m a n i p u l a t e d t h e m a n d t h e y plan t o d o t e rr i b l e t h i n g s — " " T h e c re ws a r e c o m i n g f r om O u t s i d e , " I say. " T h e y s h o u l d b e h e r e wi t hi n a m a t t e r of h o u r s n o w , a n d w h e n t h e y s e e w h a t has h a p p e n e d , t h e r e will b e t er ri bl e r e tr i b u t i o n . I a m perfectly willing to wait a few h o u r s. Your priso n s m e a n nothing." " N o o n e will c o m e . Th ey will t u r n t h e m b ac k at t h e d o c k s . " " T h e n t h e y will circle a n d c o m e in f ro m t h e u p t o w n side. You a r e a fool, Lara." " N o , " s h e says, " y o u a re a fool. I d o n o t e v e n k n o w y o u r n a m e . You n e v e r t o ld m e y o u r n a m e . " "It d o e s n ' t m a t t e r . " 74
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“ You n e v e r t ol d m e y o u r n a m e o r w h a t y o u p l a n n e d o r w h a t w e w e r e s u p p o s e d to d o a n d n o w it's t o o late. You a r e t h e o n e w h o is a f o o l . " She leans t o w a r d m e , instinctively trying t o p u t h e r h e a d a ga ins t m i n e b u t , of c o u r s e , t h e bars s t op her. W h o is in jail? W h o is really in jail? "I t h i n k I can get y o u o u t of h e r e , " s h e says, " b u t you'll h av e t o m a k e t h e e s c a p e o n y o u r o w n . I c a n ' t h el p y o u a ny f u r t h e r . " "I n e e d n o e s c a p e . It is t h e y w h o will h av e t o e s c a p e w h e n it is s e e n w h a t has b e e n d o n e to m e . " " O h , you f o o l , " s h e says, r e le asi ng h e r grip o n t h e bars a n d f l ut te ring h e r h a n d s like t h e wi ng s of a fowl, m o v i n g away f r o m m e. " O h , y ou fool, y o u fool. You d o n ' t u n d e r s t a n d a n y t h i ng at all, d o y o u ? " An d I h e a r f o o t s t e p s a n d t h e f o o t s t e p s a re u p o n us a n d l u m p e n c o m e into t h e c o r r i d o r a n d sei ze Lara, d r a g h e r away, leaving t h e hall very q u i e t again. In t h e distance I hear sounds. Then th e d o o r down the corridor op ens a n d t h e y c o m e a ga in; I s e e O s w a l d , K e n n ed y , Co nna ll y, o t h e r faces I d o n o t k n o w , p e e r i n g i ncur ious ly at m e t h r o u g h t h e bars, t he i r faces b l a n d , as if h e a l e d o v e r f r o m pain, o n l y t h e eyes d ar k a n d alive in t h o s e f aces, t h e h a n d s raised like a n e t w o r k t o g u i d e m e t h r o u g h . And w i t h o u t n e ce s si ty to h e a r w h a t t h e y say, I s ta n d , b ra c in g myself a ga i ns t a wall, f e eli ng t h e s t o n e m o v i n g a gai ns t my s h o u l d e r b l a d e s a n d b u t t o c k s o r t h e n again t h e wall is stolid, u n s h a k e n , a n d it is I w h o a m t r e m b l i n g u p o n it like an i nsect. " C o m e , " o n e of t h e m says t o m e a n d I c o m e . T h r o u g h t h e c o r r i d o r s of t h e T o m b s , like d e e p r o o ts f r om a p la n t s pr awl in g th r o u g h th e earth, a n d o n to th e steps, w h e r e I se e o th e rs g a t h e r e d to await me. I w o u l d fall gratefully b u t am h e l d by a r m s b e f o r e , a rms b e h i n d . " N o w , " o n e of t h e m says a n d I am led t o w a r d t h e motorcade. V I d o n o t like t h e l u m p e n : I h a t e a n d fear t h e m . But in h o w m a n y d r e a m s did t h e y m o v e b e f o r e m e , t h o s e f o r m s c l o t te d by d a r k n e s s , s h a d o w s a ga in s t t h e sprawl of t h e a b a n d o n e d 75
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city? " W e ar e y o u r h i st or y, " t h e y have w h i s p e r e d t o m e in t h o s e d r e a m s . " W e a re w h a t all of y o u have b e e n a n d yet c o u l d b e if y o u w e r e n o t p a r t of t h e city." And I d o n o t k n o w if it wa s t e n d e r n e s s o r m o c k e r y b u t t h o s e f aces b r o k e o p e n softly, f ee li ng c o m i n g o u t of t h e p l a n es of t h o s e faces like b l o o d , a n d in t h o s e d r e a m s I m u s t h av e a n s w e r e d , saying, "Yes, it is t r u e . Yes, y o u a r e o u r hi story, b u t t h e r e m u s t b e m o r e t o it t h a n t ha t, s o m e t h i n g t h a t 1 c an e x t r a c t . " And t h e y l a u g h e d t h e n as l u m p e n o f t e n d o in t h e i r silly, a b a n d o n e d f a sh i o n a n d said, " T h e r e is n o t h i n g y ou c an extract. T h e r e is n o t h i n g y o u c an learn. W e h av e n o t h i n g t o say to y o u , n o my st er i es t o i mp a rt , w e a re m u t e as s t o n e s , " a n d s o o n a n d s o f o r t h . W h a t i n t e n s e d i a l o g u e s I h a d w i t h t h e m in t h e s e d r e a m s ! W h y I m u s t h av e b e e n o b s e s s e d with t h e m for y ear s, a n d in t e r m s of t h a t , it m a d e a g re at deal of s e n s e w h e n it c a m e t i m e for t h e p r o j e c t in partial fulfillment of, etc. , m a d e a g r e at deal of s e n s e t o g o b a c k t o t h e city itself a n d c o n f r o n t t h e m in t h e real. B e c a us e if I c o u l d u s e t h e m , c o u l d m a k e t h e m p a r t o f t h e p r o j e c t , t h e n — w as it as s i mp l e as t ha t? — t h e y w o u l d b e w r e n c h e d f r e e of history a n d i m p o r t a n d w o u l d b e c o m e m e r e l y a c t o r s in my o w n stagi ng, w h i c h w as t h e i r onl y f u n c t io n a n d cert ai nl y a far m o r e r e a s o n a b l e w a y in w h i c h t o c o n f r o n t t h e l u m p e n p r o b l e m . W a s n ' t it? H o w d i d I e v e r e n d in this sit uat i on? "Let m e d o t h i s , " I said t o t h e C o m m i t t e e in gravity a s s e m b l e d a fter I h a d m a d e t h e p r e s e n t a t i o n , " a n d I c an b r i n g b a c k to y ou a g e n u i n e r e c o n s t r u c t i o n of an i m p o r t a n t historical e v e nt . W h a t w e have f o r g o t t e n , living o n t h e O u t s i d e , is t h e g e n u i n e g r u b b i n e s s of m o s t of t h e s e t r a g e d i e s . Th e y did n o t o c c u r in h i gh p l a c e s a m o n g t h e c l e a n l y a s s e m b l e d b u t w e r e in f act s t u m b l i n g e v e n t s e n a c t e d by p e o p l e ver y m u c h like t h e l u m p e n . I c an s h o w yo u this. I c an s h o w y o u s o m e t h i n g u n d e r s t a n d a b l e a n d i m p o r t a n t t h a t y o u have y e t a v o i d e d . Besi des, it is g o i n g t o b e fifty-three y e ar s s i n c e t h e a ss a ss i na t io n a f e w m o n t h s f r o m n o w a n d in t e r m s of t h e n e w c a l e n d a r this is a n i m p o r t a n t a nni ve rsa ry. You c an f r a n c hi s e t h e t a p e s . N o t o n l y will I profit b u t t h e A c a d e m y as we ll ." 76
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O h, how they m um bled and grumbled, stum bled and rum bled. " T h e d a n g e r s , " t h e C o m m i t t e e said, " a n d t h e k n o w n instability of this class of p e o p l e , a n d t h e n again, really, h o w m u c h c o nt r o l ca n it b e said t ha t y ou will e x e rt o v e r t h e m ? T h e y a r e a v i ol ent, u n s t a b l e class of p e o p l e ; it is a c o n d i t i o n of t h e i r e n v i r o n m e n t . An d f u r t h e r m o r e , y ou w o u l d h a v e to sign a full wai ver o f r e l ea s e n o t o nl y for y o u r s e l f b u t f or t h e crews." "The crews are no p ro blem ," I assured th e Committee. "W e ca n u s e for p e r s o n n e l t h o s e w h o a r e a lr e ad y o n t h e v e r g e of e xi le . " I m u s t have s m il e d at t h e m t h e n . "This will a s s u r e t he ir total c o o p e r a t i o n . " " O f c o u r s e , " t h e C o m m i t t e e said. T he y— h e , it— i n s p e c t e d fingernails, l o o k e d o v e r t h e small r o o m in w h i c h t h e orals w e r e c o ndu cted and then, putting hands on the table, stood p o n d e r ously. "Let us t h i n k of it," t h e C o m m i t t e e said, " a n d we'll let y ou k n o w . An i n t e r e s t i n g p r o j e c t , an i n t e r e s t i n g idea, b u t m i no r , w e t h in k . Essentially m i n o r . O f c o u r s e y o u have m a d e t h e s e n sa t i o n a l a s p e c t s of it q u i t e clear t o us, b ut it is n o t m e r e l y s e n s a tio n a lis m t h a t w e s e e k f ro m a ma j or in t h e his t o r i e s; r at he r t h e r e m u s t b e a c er ta in d e p t h a n d t h e idea s e e m s lacking, r a t h e r — " " B u t r e m e m b e r , " I said, r a t h e r h o a rs e ly p e r h a p s (I a m at t i me s m o r e a w a r e of t h e t o n e s a n d t e n o r of my voi ce, t h e s e n s e of my g e s t u r e s , t h a n t h e n or ma l p e r s o n ; an e x t r a or d i n a r y sensitivity m u s t b e t h e e x p l a na t io n ) , " t h e l u m p e n . Th e y will b e pl aying t h e roles, a n d t h e majesti c irony, t h e c o mp l e x it y of t h e fact t h a t t h e s e figur es a n d e v e n t s a r e b e i n g r e c o n s t r u c t e d by t h e filthiest, dirtiest, g r u b b i e s t , m o s t d a n g e r o u s , m a l e vo l e n t, d e g r a d e d a n d d i s e a s e d s e g m e n t s w e k n o w — " C h o k i n g , I was q u i t e u n a b l e t o g o o n . T h e filthiness of t h e l u m p e n has always filled m e wi t h e x c i t e m e n t . It m u s t h av e s o m e t h i n g to d o with t h a t o b s e s s i o n t o w h i c h I have a lr ea dy frankly r e f e rr ed . "It will b e a fine p r o j e c t , " I f i n i sh e d, r u b b i n g my h a n d s . "A fine p r o j ec t , an e x c el l e n t p r o j e c t , a n d t h e t a p e s will b e pri cel ess a n d b e c o m e t h e p r o p e r t y of t h e A c a d e m y . " " We l l, t h a t is t h o u g h t f u l , " t h e C o m m i t t e e r u m b l e d a n d s t u m 77
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bled and g ru m b le d and b u m b l e d and m u m b l e d and w e n t on its p o n d e r o u s way, leaving m e with a p r o m i s e for de c is i on in t h e i m m i n e n t f u t u r e , a n d in d u e c o u r s e p e r m i s s i o n c a m e d o w n a n d I j o u r n e y e d i nto t h e city a l o n e a n d u n a r m e d ( b e c a u s e I h a d n o physical fear of t h e m ) t o p u t t o g e t h e r my cast for r e h ea r sa l s , with t h e c r e w s t o c o m e in i n d e p e n d e n t l y t h r e e days later, a n d e v e r y t h i n g was to w o r k o u t s pl e n d i dl y , a r e m a r k a b l e p roj ect . An d t h e n t h e r e h e ar s al s fell into s o m e difficulty a n d t h e y w o u l d n o t listen to m e w h e n I gave t h e m o r d e r s a n d t h e b l o c k i n g b e c a m e u n s t u c k a n d t h e line r e a d i n g s b r o k e d o w n a n d I h a d t o tell t h e m w h a t t h e y w e r e b e c a u s e this was t h e onl y way to s h o c k t h e m into c o m p l i a n c e a n d t h e n t h e y t u r n e d u p o n m e a n d t h r e w m e in a cell a n d t h e n t o o k m e o u t of t h e cell a n d — H o w d id I e v e r g e t i nto this? VI I find myself t h r u s t into t h e thir d car of t h e m o t o r c a d e . Roses all a r o u n d m e ; Lara t o t h e left. It is g o i n g t o o q u i c k l y f o r d e t a c h e d o b s e r v a t i o n ; t h e car b e g in s t o m o v e . Lara, t o my left, sits f r o z e n , h a n d s c l a s p e d , l o o k i n g a h e a d ; in h e r bl an k c h e e k s I can s e e n o r e a s o n , n o accessibility. They s t e p away fr om m e ; t h e car m o v e s s o m e w h a t m o r e quickly. Sea b r e e z e s off t h e Battery waft t h e smell of fish into my nostrils; I w o n d e r w h a t K e n n e d y s m e l l e d o n t h a t d ay a l m o s t fifty-three y e ar s ago. St ra ng e, s t r a n g e , I h av e n e v e r felt s o c l os e to him. " W h a t is g o i n g o n ? " I a sk Lara, a n d again, " W h a t is go i ng o n ? " An d s h e t u r n s t o w a r d m e t h e n , h e r ey es r o u n d a n d o p e n , h e r m o u t h s aggi ng. Sh e c l u t c h e s r os e s, spills t h e m like b l o o d d r o p s f ro m h e r h a n d s , a n d I s e e in t h e s la c kn e ss of f e a t u r e t ha t all a l o n g I m u s t h av e m i s j u d g e d her . She t o o is l u m p e n . From t h e b e g i n n i n g , I w as s u r r o u n d e d by t h e m . I t h o u g h t t ha t I was t h e d i r e c t o r a n d all t h e t i m e it wa s t h e y w h o . . . T he s un c o m e s a ga in st my e y es ; I s q u i nt , raise a h a n d in a b l oc k in g g e s t u r e , a n d I feel t h e i n c r e a s e d a cc e le r a ti on of t h e car p r e s s i n g m e firmly i nto t h e c u s h i o n s . A m a z i n g t ha t 78
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t h e y w e r e a bl e t o ge t this ol d f leet of a rc ha i c ve hi cl es r u n n i n g again s o m e h o w ; high m arks for their animal c u n n i n g and i n g e nuit y. I feel i nc r ea s i ng s p e e d . “ W h a t is t hi s? " I say. “ This is en ti re ly w r o n g . This is n o t t h e wa y it w a s s u p p o s e d t o be. I a m t h e d i r ec to r. I d o n o t b e l o n g in h e r e . " “ Q u i e t , " Lara says, "St ay q u i e t . An d k e e p d o w n . G e t d o w n n o w ! " An d t h e rising t h r e a d o f h e r vo ic e l o o p s m e , c a u s e s m e t o look u p at t h e t wi nkl ing s u n , at Muni ci pal a b o v e me . T h e r e is s o m e o n e in a w i n d o w of M u ni c ip a l; I c a n s e e t h e barrel of t h e rifle m ov i n g a n d r e t r e a t i n g t h r o u g h t h e a p e r t u r e . “ O h , my G o d , " Lara says, “ y o u f o o l . " An d I dive t h e n , b e g i n ning t o u n d e r s t a n d w h a t has h a p p e n e d , b u t as I d o s o it is with h o p e l e s s n e s s b e c a u s e I k n o w t h a t it is a l re a dy t o o late a n d I s h o u l d have d o n e t h e diving t h r e e s e c o n d s o r m a y b e it was t h r e e m o n t h s a go. I feel t h e i m pa c t like a h o r d e of b e e s a r o u n d my scalp; it d o e s n o t h u r t very badly. " T h e c r e w s ! " s h e cries. " W h e r e ar e t h e c r e w s ? " And I look u p agai n, trying t o sight t h e m . The c r ew s ar e h e r e at last. They will g a u g e t h e s ituati on in an i nst ant a n d r us h in to save me f r o m t h e s e b a r b ar i a ns . But t h e n , as I d o i n d e e d s e e t h e m , just c o m i n g i nt o view o n t he ir s l o w - m o v i n g v ehi cl es at t h e rim of t h e Battery, t e l e s c o p e s fixed a n d p o i n t i n g at m e . . . Well, as I s e e t h e m , I s e e e v e r y t hi n g at last a n d it is really t o o m u c h for m e . I c a n n o t deal wi th it. I c a n n o t b eg i n t o deal with it. W h y m e ? I ask, b u t n o p o i n t in p le a di n g. I s e e t h e a n s w e r . W h y n o t ? s o m e t h i n g el se says. W h y n o t y o u i n d e e d ? It c o u l d , a f t e r all, h a v e b e e n a n y o n e .
I dive t o w a r d t h e f l o o r b o a r d s of t h e car, h o p i n g t h a t t h e y will s u p p o r t m e a ga ins t i mp ac t, a n d as I d o so, in m i d - g e s t u r e , I feel t h e s e c o n d hit, t h e real o n e , t e a r i n g in t h r o u g h t h e side of my ne ck . It m u s t b e t h e w i n d p i p e . My b r e a t h is c u t off; I flutter like a fish a g a i ns t t h e c u s h i o n s a n d t h e n c o l l ap s e in Lara's lap, g r o a n i n g . Everything g o e s away f r o m m e . I feel he r h a n d s . It c o u l d h a v e b e e n a n y o n e . “ T h e c r e ws , my G o d , t h e cr ews ! T he y' ve s h o t my h u s b a n d ! " s h e s c r e a m s , a n d this is really t h e last t h i n g I h ea r , at least 79
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t h e last d u r i n g this d is gr ac e, b u t as I d r o w n in my o w n seri es of e x p l o s i o n s , I t h i n k w h a t it mi g h t b e like to h av e c o n f r o n t e d t h e C o m m i t t e e with my k n o w l e d g e of t h e ir t r e a c h e r y . . . a n d t o explain t o t h e m t h a t it c o u l d h av e b e e n w o r k e d o u t e ve n m o r e easily a n d at less e x p e n s e . T he r a n d o m n e s s o f it all. Is this w h y t h e y allow t h e l u m p e n t o live?
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The Undercity DEAN R. K OONTZ Well, kid, it was a b u s y day. You m i g h t e v e n say it w as a h a r r o w ing day, a n d y o u mi g ht b e t e m p t e d t o t h i n k t h a t it w a s s o m e h o w o u t of t h e o r di na ry . But y o u m u s t u n d e r s t a n d , st ra ig h t off, t h a t it w as per fect ly n o r m a l as b u s i n e s s days g o , n o b e t t e r a n d n o w o r s e t h a n t e n t h o u s a n d days b e f o r e it. An d if I live s o l o n g , it w o n ' t b e a p p r e c i a b l y d i f f e r e n t f r o m a n y o f t e n t h o u s a n d days t o follow. R e m e m b e r t hat . If y o u w a n t t o e n t e r t h e family b u s i n e s s , kid, y ou have t o b e a bl e t o c o p e with long st rings of days like this o n e , c a l e n d a r s full of t h e m . O n c e , w h e n t h e cities w e r e n ' t a t e n t h as large as t h e y are n o w , w h e n a m a n m i g h t t r a v e l a n d m i g h t h av e b u s i n e s s c o n t a c t s t h r o u g h o u t t h e w o r l d , w e w e r e called T h e U n d e r w o r l d , a n d w e w e r e e n v i e d a n d f e a r e d . W e a r e still e n v i e d a n d f e a r e d , b u t n o w w e ' r e called T h e U nd e r ci t y , b e c a u s e t h at is t h e w o r l d t o us, a n d m o r e t h a n w e can rightly h a n d l e anyway. I, for o n e , w o u l d b e h a p p y t o roll t h i n g s ba ck , t o b r e a k d o w n t h e s e h u n d r e d - s t o r y m e g a l o p o l i s e s a n d live in a t i m e w h e r e w e c o u l d call o u r s e l v e s a par t of T he U n d e r w o r l d , b e c a u s e t h i ng s w e r e a hell of a lot e a s i e r t h e n for o u r t y p e . Just c o n s i d e r . . . Nearly all f o r m s of g a m b l i n g w e r e illegal b a c k t h e n . An e n t e r pri si ng y o u n g m a n c o u l d s t e p in, b u c k t h e law, a n d c le an u p a tidy s u m with a minimal financial o ut la y a n d with a l m os t n o p e r s o n a l risk at all. C o p s a n d j u d g e s w e r e o n t h e t ak e; c l a n d e s t i n e c a s i no s , s t r e e t g a m e s a n d s t o r e f r o n t b e t t i n g s h o p s t hr iv ed . No l o n g e r. They legal ized it, a n d t h e y gave us b a n k clerks for c a s i no m a n a g e r s , CPA's i n s te a d of b o u n c e r s . They m a d e g a m b l i n g r e s p e c t a b l e — a n d b or i ng . 81
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Dr ugs w e r e illegal t h e n , t o o . Grass, h a sh , skag, c o k e , s p e e d . . . G o d , a n e n t e r p r i s i n g y o u n g kid like y o u r s e l f c o u l d m a k e a f o r t u n e in a year. But n o w grass a n d hash ar e t r a d e d o n t h e o p e n m a r k e t , a n d all t h e h a r d e r d r u g s a r e available t o all t h e l o o n i e s w h o will sign a heal th wai ver a n d b u y t h e m fr om t h e g o v e r n m e n t . W h e r e ' s t h e thrill n o w? G o n e . And w h e r e ' s t h e profit? G o n e , t o o . Sex. O h , kid, t h e m o n e y t o b e m a d e o n sex, b a c k t h e n . It was all illegal: p r o st it u t io n , dirty mo v i es , p ic t u r e p os t c a r d s , er oti c d a n c i n g , a du lt er y, y o u n a m e it! N o w t h e g o v e r n m e n t l icens es t h e b r o t h e l s , b o t h m a l e a n d f e ma l e, a n d t h e wife or h u s b a n d w i t h o u t a lover o n t h e side is c o n s i d e r e d a t h r o w b a c k . Is this a ny way to m a k e a buc k? Hell, kid, e v e n m u r d e r wa s illegal in t h o s e days, a n d a ma n c ou ld b uy t h e big trip for w i p i n g s o m e o n e off t h e slate. As y o u k n o w , s o m e folks n e v e r c an s e e m t o learn t h e niceties of civilized life— t h e i r m a n n e r s a re a t r o c i o u s , t h e i r b u s i n e s s m e t h o d s d o w n r i g h t d e v i o u s , t h e i r insults u n n e c e s s a r i l y public a n d d e m e a n i n g — a n d t h e s e p e o p l e n e e d to b e e l i m i n a t e d f rom t h e social s p h e r e . N o w w e h ave t h e c o d e d u e l l o , t h r o u g h w h i c h a ma n c an settle his g r u d g e s a n d satisfy his h o n o r , all legally. The o n c e- l uc r at iv e c a r e e r as a hi r ed assassin has g o n e t h e way of t h e five-dollar s t r ee t wa l ke r . Now, kid, you have g o t t o h u s tl e all day, e ve r y day, if you w a n t t o survive in this b u s i n e s s . Yo u ' ve g o t t o b e r e s ou r c e f u l , clever a n d f o r w a r d - t h i n k i n g if y o u e x p e c t t o m e e t t h e c o m p e t i ti on. Let m e tell y o u h o w t h e da y w e n t , b e c a u s e it w a s a day like all days . . . I b o l t e d d o w n a b r e a kf a s t of p r o t e i n p a s te a n d cafa, t h e n m e t Lew Boldoni o n t h e fifth s u b b a s e m e n t level in W¡ng-L, w h e r e o n l y t h e r ep a i r r o b o t s go. Boldoni was wa it ing o n t h e r o b o t w a l k b e s i d e t h e bel tway, car ryi ng his tool sa tc he l, w a t c h ing t h e c a r t o n s of p e r i s h a b l e s m o v e pas t him. “ O n t i m e , " h e said. I said, “ As u s u a l . " Ti me is m o n e y ; cliché b u t t r u e . 82
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W e r e m o v e d t h e a c c e ss plate to t h e b e ltway w o r k i n g s , w e n t d o w n u n d e r t h e r o b ot w a l k . In less t h a n five m i n u t e s , w e w e r e directly b e n e a t h t h e big belt, b ar el y a bl e t o s h o u t a b o v e t h e roar, b u f f e t e d by t h e w i n d of its c o n t i n u o u s p a s s a g e. T o g e t h e r , w e o p e n e d o n e of t h e hydraulic lines a n d let t h e l ubr icant s p e w o u t o v e r t h e traffic c o m p u t e r t e r m i na l , w h e r e it wa s s u r e to s e e p t h r o u g h a n d d o s o m e d a m a g e . Before a fire c ou l d start, w e w e r e o u t of t h e r e , u p o n t h e s id e wa l k agai n, p u tt i ng t h e a cc es s pl ate b a ck w h e r e it b e l o n g e d . That d o n e , j ust as t h e a l a rms w e r e b e g i n n i n g t o c lang, w e w e n t in d i f fe r en t d i r e c tions. W e b o t h ha d o t h e r b u s i n e s s . This bit of s a b o t a g e w o u l d n ' t pay off until m u c h later in t h e day. At 9:30 in t h e m o r n i n g , right o n t i me , I m e t a y o u n g c o u ple — G e n e a n d Miriam P o t e m k i n — in a p u bl ic h y d r o p o n i c s par k o n t h e eighty- thi r d level, in t h a t n e i g h b o r h o o d t h e y call C h e l s e a . She was t w e n t y - o n e a n d a l o ok e r, bri ght a n d c u ri o u s a n d u n h a p p y . He was a y e a r o l d e r t h a n s h e was , b u t t h a t was t h e o nl y real d i ff e r e n c e b e t w e e n t h e m . T he y sat o n a b e n c h by an artificial waterfall, b o t h of t h e m l ea ni ng f o r w ar d as I a p p r o a c h e d , b o t h with t h e i r h a n d s f o l d e d in t h e i r laps, m o r e like si st er a n d b r o t h e r t h a n like wi fe a n d h u s b a n d . " D i d y o u b r in g it?" h e a s ke d. I r e m o v e d a s e a l e d e n v e l o p e f ro m my p o c k e t , p o p p e d t h e seal a n d let t h e m s e e t h e m a p i ns ide , t h o u g h I w as careful n o t t o let t h e m h a n d l e it just t h e n . I said, " A n d y o u ? " S h e lifted a small plastic sat chel f ro m t h e g r o u n d b e s i d e h e r a n d t o o k a n o t h e r s e a l e d e n v e l o p e f r o m it, r e l u c t a n t l y h a n d e d it over . I o p e n e d it, c o u n t e d t h e m o n e y , n o d d e d , t u c k e d t h e e n v e l o p e into my p o c k e t a n d gave t h e m t h e m a p. " W a i t a m i n u t e , h e r e ! " Mr. Po t emk i n said. " A c c o r d i n g to this d a m n m a p , we'll b e g o i n g o u t t h r o u g h t h e s e w e r ! You k n o w t ha t 's n o t p o s si bl e . S e w a g e is p u m p e d at p r e s s u r e , a n d t h e r e ' s n o wa y t o survive in t h e s y s t e m . " 83
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" T r u e e n o u g h , " I said. " B u t if you'll l o o k closel y at t h e m a p, you'll s e e t h a t t h e s e w a g e line is e n c a s e d i ns id e a lar ger p i p e , f r o m w h i c h r epair s ca n b e m a d e t o t h e s y s t em. This larger p i p e is e v e r y w h e r e t w e n t y f e et in d i a m e t e r , s o m e t i m e s as m u c h as thirty, a n d is always e n o u g h larger t h a n t h e s e w a g e p i p e itself t o give y o u a d e q u a t e crawl s p a c e . " "I d o n ' t k n o w , " h e said. "It d o e s n ' t l o o k eas y . . ." " N o wa y o u t of t h e city is easy, for G o d ' s s a k e ! " I t ol d him. " L o o k , P o t e m k i n , t h e c i t y f a t h e r s say t h a t t h e o p e n land, b e y o n d t h e cities, is unl¡vable. It's full of p o i s o n e d air, p o i s o n e d w a t e r , p l a g u e , a n d host il e pl an t a n d a nima l life. That 's w h y t h e air f reight exits a r e t h e o n l y o n e s t ha t a r e m a i n t a i n e d , a n d t h a t ' s w h y t h e y ' r e so carefully s u p e r v i s e d . City law f o r b i d s a n y o n e t o leave t h e city f or fe a r they'll r e t u r n b e a r i n g o n e of t h e p l a g u e s f ro m O u t s i d e . No w, c o n s i d e r i n g all of this, c o u l d y o u r e a s o n ably e x p e c t m e t o p r o v i d e y o u with an e a s y wa y o u t ? " "1 s u p p o s e n o t . " " A n d t h a t 's d a m n s t r a i g h t. " Ms. P o t e m k i n said, "It' s really n o t like t h a t O u t s i d e , is it? Th e s tor ie s of p l a g u e s , p o i s o n e d air a n d w a t e r , m o n s t e r s — all of t h a t ' s j ust s o m u c h b u n k . " "I w o u l d n ' t k n o w , " I said. "But you must know!" "Oh?" " Y o u ' v e s h o w n us t h e w a y o u t , " s h e said. " Yo u m u s t have s e e n w h a t ' s b e y o n d t h e city." " I ' m afraid n o t , " I said. "I e m p l o y e n g i n e e r s , specialists, w h o w o r k f r o m d i a g r a m s a n d b l u e p r i nt s . N o n e of my p e o p l e w o u l d c o n s i d e r leaving t h e city; w e ' v e g o t t o o m u c h g o i n g for us h e r e . " " B u t , " s h e insi st ed, "By s e n d i n g us, y o u ' r e s h o w i n g y o u r di st ru st of t h e old s tor ie s a b o u t t h e O u t s i d e . " " N o t at all," I e x p l a i n e d . " O n c e y o u ' v e g o n e , my m e n will seal off this e s c a p e r o u t e s o y o u c a n ' t c o m e b a c k t h a t way, just in c a s e y ou m i g h t br i ng a p l a g u e with y o u . " " A n d y ou w o n ' t sell it a ga in ? " 84
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" N o . We'll find o t h e r wa ys o u t . T h e r e a r e millions o f t h e m . " T he y l o o k e d at e a c h o t h e r , u n s u r e of t h e m s e l v e s n o w. I said, "L o o k , y o u h a v e n ' t c o m m i t t e d t h e m a p t o m e m o r y . If y ou w a n t , I c an t a k e it b a c k a n d r e t u r n half y o u r m o n e y . " " N o , " h e said. S h e said, " W e ' v e m a d e u p o u r m i n d s . W e n e e d o p e n land, s o m e t h i n g m o r e t h a n layer o n layer of e n c l o s e d s t r e et s a n d corridors." "S ui t y o u r s e l f , " I said. " A n d g o o d l u c k. " I s h o o k t h e i r h a n d s a n d g o t t h e hell o u t of t h e r e ; t h i ng s to do, things to do . . . M o v i n g like a m a i n t e n a n c e r o b o t o n a n e m e r g e n c y call, 1 d r o p p e d d o w n to th e s u b b a s e m e n t s again, to th e garbage m o n i t o r i n g d e c k s , w h e r e I m e t with t h e day-shift m a n a g e r , K. O . Wi l so n. W e s h o o k h a n d s at p re ci se ly 10:20, five m i n u t e s b e h i n d s c h e d u l e , a n d w e w e n t i n to t h e r e tr i ev a l c h a m b e r , w h e r e h e h a d t h e first t w o h o u r s of d i sc o ve r ie s laid o u t in n e a t , cl ea n o r d e r . Kid, I d o n ' t t hi n k I've e v e r t a lk ed a b o u t this a n gl e of t h e family b u s i n e s s b e f o r e , b e c a u s e I'm n o t t h a t p r o u d of it. It's t h e c h e a p e s t f or m o f s c a v e n g i n g , n o m a t t e r h o w l ucrative it is. A n d it is lucrative. You s e e , t h e mai n p i p e s of t h e g a r b a g e s h u ttle system are m o n ito r e d electronically a n d filtered to r e m o v e a ny articles of v a lu e t ha t m i g h t o t h e r w i s e b e f u n n e l e d into t h e main s e w a g e lines a n d p u m p e d o u t of t h e city. I've g o t K. O . Wi ls o n , of t h e first shift, a n d Marty L¡nnert, o f t h e s e c o n d shift, o n my payroll. T h e y s e e t o it t h a t I h ave t i m e t o l oo k o v e r t h e da y' s fi nd in gs b e f o r e t h e y ' r e c a t a l o g u e d a n d s e n t u p t o t h e city's l o s t - a n d - f o u n d b u r e a u . Before y o u t h i nk t o o b ad l y of y o u r o ld m a n , c o n s i d e r t h a t 20 p e r c e n t of t h e family's g ro ss c o m e s f r o m t h e g a r b a g e o p e r a t i o n . "Six v a l ua b le rings, a d o z e n g o o d w a t c h e s , w h a t a p p e a r s to b e o n e f o l d er of a t op - qu al ¡ t y c oin coll ec ti on, a d i a m o n d tiara, a n d a m e s s of o t h e r j u n k , " Wi ls on t ol d m e , p o i n t i n g t o t h e g o o d i t e ms , w h i c h h e h a d s e t a s i de for me . I i g n o r e d t h e w a t c h e s , t o o k t w o o f t h e rings, t h e tiara a n d 85
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t h e d a m p f o l d e r full of o ld coi ns. " N o t h i n g e l s e ?" "A c o r p s e , " h e said. "That'll i n t e r e st t h e c o p s . I p u t it o n ice until y o u c o u l d ge t in a n d c h e c k o v e r y o u r stuff first." "A m u r d e r ? " I a s k e d . "Yeah." Kid, t h e c o d e d u e l l o h a s n ' t s o l ve d e ve ry th in g. T h e r e a re still t h o s e w h o a r e afraid t o fight, w h o p r e fe r t o s n e a k a b o u t a n d r e pa y t h e i r e n e m i e s illegally. An d t h e r e a r e also t h o s e w h o a r e n ' t satisfied with t a king e c o n o m i c a n d e m o t i o n a l r e v e n g e f r om t h o s e n o t eligible for t h e d u e l s ; t h e y insist o n b l o o d , a n d t h e y h a v e it. E v e n tu a ll y , t h e law h a s t h e m . W e ' r e n o t i nvolved with p e o p l e of this sor t, b u t y o u s h o u l d k n o w t h e kind of s c u m t h a t t h e city still s u p p o r t s . I t ol d W i l s on , "I'll s e n d a m a n a r o u n d after n o o n t o s e e w h a t els e y o u ' v e go t by t h e n . " Ten m i n u t e s later, atl O: 53, 1 w a l k e d into t h e offices of Boldoni a n d G¡a C y b e r n e t i c Repairs, o n t h e n i n e t y - s e c o n d floor, W¡ngB, w h e r e I a c t e d ver y s h o c k e d a b o u t t h e b r e a k d o w n in t h e be lt wa y s y st e m. "City E ngi ne e r Willis left an u r g e n t m e s s a g e for y o u , " my s e cr e ta r y said. S he h a n d e d it t o m e a n d said, "It' s a bel tway carrying p e r i s h a b l e s in t h e fifth s u b b a s e m e n t . " "Is Mr. Boldoni t h e r e ? " I a s k e d. " H e a c c o m p a n i e d t h e first r ep a ir t e a m , " s h e said. "Call d o w n a n d tell Willis I'm o n my w a y ." I u s e d t h e e x p r e s s d r o p a n d a l m o s t lost my p r o t e i n pa st e a n d cafa— a ny i n c o n v e n i e n c e for a g o o d c u s t o m e r , a n d t h e city is t h e b e s t c u s t o m e r t h a t B o l d o n i a n d G¡a C y b e r n e t i c Repairs has on its list. Willis w as wait i ng for m e by t h e bel tway. He 's a small ma n with very bl ack hair a n d very d a r k e ye s a n d a way of m ov i n g th at m a k e s you th i n k of a m a i n t e n a n c e r o b o t with a s h o r t b e t w e e n his s h o u l d e r b l ad e s. He s cu t t le d t o w a r d m e a n d said, "What a mess!" "Tell m e , " I said. " T h e ma in hydr auli c line b r o k e o v e r t h e traffic c o m p u t e r 86
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t e r mi na l a n d a fire s t a r t e d in t h e w o r k s . " " T h a t d o e s n ' t s o u n d so b a d , " I said. He w i p e d his small face with o n e large h a n d a n d said, "It w o u l d n ' t have b e e n if it h a d s t o p p e d t h e r e . W e ' v e g o t t h e fire o u t al ready. T h e o nl y t r o u b l e is t h a t t h e l u br i ca n t has run b a ck t h e lines into t h e main traffic c o m p u t e r a n d t h e d a m n t h i n g w o n ' t s h u t d o w n . I've g o t p e r i s h a b l e s m o v i n g u p o u t of t h e s u b t e r r a n e a n c o o l e r s , a n d n o way t o m o v e t h e m o r s t o p t h e m . T h e y 'r e piling u p o n m e fast, Mr. Gia. I h av e to have this b el t w a y m o v i n g insi de t h e h o u r o r t h e lo ss e s are going to be staggering." "We 'l l d o t h e j o b , " I a s s u r e d him. "I w e n t o u t on t h e limb, calling y o u b e f o r e y o u c o u l d deli ver a q u ic k c o m p u t e r i z e d e s t i m a t e . But I k n e w y ou p e o p l e w e r e th e fastest, and I n e e d e d s o m e o n e w h o could be here immediately." " D o n ' t y ou w o r r y â b o u t it," I t old hi m. " W h a t e v e r t h e B & G c o m p u t e r e s t i m a t e s we'll s h a v e by t e n p e r c e n t to k e e p your bosses happy." Willis wa s ecstatic, t h a n k i n g m e again a n d agai n. He d i d n ' t u n d e r s t a n d t h a t t h e Bol doni a n d Gia h o u s e c o m p u t e r always e s t i m a t e d an add i ti on al a n d q u i t e illegal 15 p e r c e n t surprof¡t, m o r e t h a n n e g a t i n g t h e 10 p e r c e n t d i s c o u n t I'd given him. W hi le h e was still t h a n k i n g me , Lew Boldoni c a m e u p f ro m t h e a c c e ss t u n n e l , s m e a r e d with l ubr ic ant , l o o k i n g ha rr i e d a n d n e r v o u s a n d e x h a u s t e d . Lew is an e x ce l le n t a ctor , a n d t h at is a n o t h e r qual ification for s u c c e s s in t his b u s i n e s s . " H o w is it d o w n t h e r e ? " I a s k e d . " B a d , " Bol doni said. Willis g r o a n e d . Bol doni said, " B u t w e ' r e w i n n i n g it." " H o w l o n g? " I a s k e d. " We 'l l have t h e be lt wa y m o v i n g in an h o u r , with a jury-rigged s y s te m, a n d t h e n w e c an t a k e o u r t i m e with t h e p e r m a n e n t repairs." Willis g r o a n e d agai n, diff er entl y this t i m e : in h a p p i n e s s . 87
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I said, “ Mr. Boldoni has e v e r y t h i n g in c o n t r o l , Mr. Willis. I'm s u r e t h a t you'll b e in b u s i n e s s as usual short ly. N o w, if you'll e x c u s e m e , I've g o t s o m e o t h e r u r g e n t b u s i n e s s t o a t t e n d to." I w e n t u p in t h e e x p r e s s e l e va t or , w h i c h w a s w o r s e t h a n c o m i n g d o w n , si nc e my s t o m a c h s e e m e d t o re a ch t h e fifty-ninth f lo or s e c o n d s b e f o r e t h e r e st of me. I b o a r d e d a h o r i z on t al be lt wa y a n d r o d e t we lve miles e ast , t h e l a s t six d o w n Y - W i n g . At 1 1 : 4 0 , t e n m i n u t e s b e h i n d s c h e d u l e , I e n t e r e d an office in t h e C he s t er f i e l d District w h e r e a n o n e x i s t e n t Mr. Lincoln Pliney s u p p o s e d l y d i d b u s i n e s s . T h e r e , I l o c k e d t h e o u t e r d o o r , a p o l o g i z e d for my t a r d i n e s s t o t h e t w o p e o p l e w ait ing in t h e r e c e p t i o n a r e a, t h e n led t h e m into Lincoln Pliney's private office. I l o c k e d t h a t d o o r t o o , w e n t t o t h e d e s k , c h e c k e d o u t my b u g - d e t e c t i n g e q u i p m e n t , m a d e s u r e t h e r o o m h a d n ' t b e e n t a p p e d , t h e n sat d o w n b e h i n d my d e s k , o f f e r e d t h e c u s t o m e r s a dr in k, p o u r e d , sat b a c k a n d i n t r o d u c e d mysel f u n d e r a false n a m e . My visitors w e r e A r t h u r C o l e m a n , a r a t h er s u c c es s f ul i n d u s trialist wi th offices o n t h e h u n d r e d t h level, a n d Eileen R o m a i n e , a lovely girl, fifteen year s C o l e m a n ' s j u ni o r . W e h a d all c o m e t o g e t h e r in o r d e r t o n e g o t i a t e a ma r r i a g e b e t w e e n C o l e m a n a n d R o m a i n e , an illegal ma r ri age . "Tell m e , Mr. C o l e m a n , " I said, " j us t w h y y o u wi s h t o risk t h e fines a n d pr i so n s e n t e n c e s involved with this violation of t h e Equal Rights Act?" He s q u i r m e d a bit a n d said, " D o y o u have t o p u t it t h a t way?" I said, "I b el ie ve a c u s t o m e r m u s t k n o w t h e c o n s e q u e n c e s b e f o r e h e c an b e fairly e x p e c t e d t o e n t e r a d eal like t h i s . " " O k a y , " h e said. "We ll , I've b e e n m a r r i ed f o u r t i m e s u n d e r t h e s t a n d a r d city c o n t r a c t , a n d all f o u r ma rr i ag e s h av e t e r m i n a t e d in d iv o r c e at my insti gat ion. I'm a ver y u n h a p p y m a n , sir. I've g o t this . . . well, p e r v e r s i o n t h a t d o m i n a t e s t h e c o u r s e of my private life. I n e e d a wife w h o . . . w h o is n o t my e q u a l , w h o is s u b s e r v i e n t , w h o plays a d a t e d role as n o t h i n g m o r e t h a n 88
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my b e d m a t e a n d my h o u s e k e e p e r . I w a n t t o d o m i n a t e any marital s ituat ion t h a t I e n t e r . " I said, " C o n s c i o u s ma le c h au v i n i s m is a p u n i s h a b l e c r i m e . " "As I'm a w a r e . " " H a v e y ou s e e n a r o b o p s y c h ? " I a s k e d . " P e r h a p s o n e of t h o s e c o u l d c u r e y o u of y o u r m a l a d y . " " I ' m s u r e it c o u l d , " h e said. " B u t y o u s e e , I d o n ' t really w a n t t o b e c u r e d . I lik e myself t h e wa y I a m. I like t h e idea of a w o m a n wait ing o n m e a n d m a k i n g h e r o w n life c o n d i t i o n e d to m ine." " A n d y o u ? " I a s k e d Eileen. S h e n o d d e d , an o d d light in h e r e y e s, a n d s h e said, "I d o n ' t like t h e respo ns i bi li t y of t h e s t a n d a r d ma rr i a ge . I w a n t a ma n w h o will p u t m e in my pl a ce , a m a n I ca n l o o k u p to , a d m i r e , depend on." I tell y ou , kid, t h e s e a n t i q u a t e d lusts of t he ir s w e r e distasteful t o m e . H o w e v e r , I b e li ev e in r eb el s , b o t h g o o d a n d b ad , b e i n g a r eb e l myself, a n d I w as r e a d y t o h el p t h e m . Both h ad c o m e t o m e by w o r d - o f - m o u t h referral wi thi n t h e pas t m o n t h . I'd r e s e a r c h e d t h e lives o f b o t h , b u i l t u p t w o t h i c k d o s s i e r s , m a t c h e d t h e m , a n d called t h e m h e r e for t h e i r first a n d final m e e t i n g u n d e r my a u s p i c e s. " Yo u h av e b o t h paid m e a f i n de r 's f e e , " I t o ld t h e m . " N o w , y o u will h av e sixty days t o g e t t o k n o w e a c h o t h e r . At t h e e n d of t h at t i m e , y o u will e i t h e r fail to c o n t a c t m e a b o u t a finalization of t h e c o nt r a c t , in w h i c h c a s e I'll k n o w y o u ' v e f o u n d e a c h o t h e r u n s u i t a b l e , o r you'll c o m e b a c k h e r e a n d s et u p an a p p o i n t m e n t with my r o b o s e c . If yo u find you like e a c h o t h e r , it will b e a s i mp l e m a t t e r t o a r r a n g e an illegal ma rr i ag e, w i t h o u t t h e s t a n d a r d city c o n t r a c t . " C o l e m a n w a s n ' t satisfied with t hat. He said, "J u st h o w will you pull this off, Mr. Pl¡ney?" " T h e first s t e p , of c o u r s e , is t o h ave Eileen cert ifi ed d e a d a n d d i s p o s e d of. My p e o p l e will falsify a d e a t h r e p o r t a n d h av e it r un t h r o u g h t h e city r e c o r d s . This ma y s o u n d like an i n c re d ib l e f eat t o y o u ; it is n e v e r t h e l e s s p o s si bl e. O n c e Eileen 89
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R oma ¡n e has c e a s e d to exist, w e will c r e a t e a false p e r s o n a in t h e n a m e o f Eileen C o l e m a n . She will b e ident i fi ed as y o u r sister; an e n t i r e ser i es of life r e c o r d s will b e p l an t e d in t h e c o m p u t e r s t o solidify h e r false identity. S h e can, naturally, t h e n c o m e t o live with y o u , w i t h o u t t h e city r e c o r d s p e o p l e realizing t h a t t h e r e is a n y t h i n g sexual in y o u r c o h a b i t a t i o n . " "If y ou c an d o it," C o l e m a n said, " y o u ' r e a g e n i u s . " " N o , just c l e v e r , " I said. " An d I will d o it. In fact, o n any d a t e y o u pick, I'll have a m a n at y o u r a p a r t m e n t to officiate at a c l a n d e s t i n e w e d d i n g us i ng t h e a n ci e n t , m a l e c ha uvi ni st rituals." " T h e r e will b e n o p s y c h e p r o b e s , as t h e r e a re in o t h e r m a r riages?" s h e a s k e d . " O f c o u r s e n o t , " I said. " T h e city will have n o r e a s o n to p s y c h e p r o b e y o u u n d e r t h e Equal Rights Act b e c a u s e y o u w o n ' t , so far as t h e city is c o n c e r n e d , b e ma r ri e d at all." At t h a t p o i n t , s h e b u r s t into t ea rs a n d said, " M r . Pl¡ney, y ou a re t h e first p e r s o n , o u t s i d e of Ar t h u r h e r e , w h o ' s e v e r understood me." I s et h e r straight o n t ha t, kid, b e li ev e m e . I said, "Lady, I d o n ' t u n d e r s t a n d y o u at all, b u t I s y m p a t h i z e with rebel s. Y ou 'r e c h u c k i n g o u t total equ a l it y a n d e v e r y t h i n g a n o r ma l h u m a n b e i n g s h o u l d d e s i r e in r e t u r n for a life-style t h a t has long b e e n s h o w n t o b e i n a d e q u a t e . Y ou 'r e risking p ri so n a n d fines for k no wi ngl y c i r c u m v e n t i n g t h e Equal Rights Act. It's all crazy, b u t y o u ' v e a right t o b e n u t s . " " B u t if y o u d o n ' t u n d e r s t a n d us, n o t at all, w h y a r e y ou risking— " " Fo r t h e profit, Eileen," I said. "If this is p ul le d off, Mr. C o l e m a n will o w e m e a tidy s u m . " I s t o o d u p. " N o w , I m u s t s e e y o u o u t . I've m a n y, m a n y t h i ng s t o d o yet t o d a y . " W h e n I w as finally rid of t h e h a p p y c o u p l e , I b o a r d e d an e n t e r t a i n m e n t b e l tw ay into a r e s t a u r a n t district in Wing-P, a n d t h e r e I ha d my l u n c h: a fillet of r e c o n s t i t u t e d s e a bass, a b a k e d p o t a t o , s t r a w b e r r i e s f r o m a h y d r o p o n i c g a r d e n i m m e r s e d in s i m u l a t e d c r e a m . It w as a rich l un ch , b u t o n e t h a t w a s easily d i g e st e d . 90
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A w a r n i n g , kid: Stay away f r om greasy f o o d s for l u n c h . In this b u s i n e s s , y o u r s t o m a c h can b e t h e e n d of y o u ; it c u rd l e s g r e a s e a n d p l a g u es y o u wi th m u r d e r o u s h e a r t b u r n . By 1:30, I was b ac k o n t h e s tr ee t. I p h o n e d in t o t h e offices of Bol doni a n d G¡a a n d l e a r n e d t h a t t h e be lt wa y o n t h e fifth s u b b a s e m e n t level w a s r o l l i n g a g a i n , t h o u g h B o l d o n i n o w e s t i m a t e d p e r m a n e n t r e p a i r s as a t w o - o r t h r e e - d a y j o b . It s e e m e d t h a t o n e of t h e B & G w o r k m e n h a d f o u n d a s e c o n d p ot en t ia l b r e a k in t h e hydraul ic line j us t b e f o r e it w as re ad y t o g o. He'll g e t a b o n u s for t hat , h o w e v e r h e m a n a g e d it. At 1:45, I s t o p p e d a r o u n d t o s e e K. O . Wi l so n agai n, d o w n at t h e g a r b a g e m o n i t o r i n g d e c k s , p i c k e d u p t h e b e s t pa rt of a s e t of p u r e silver d i n n e r w a r e , an a n t i q u e oil la n te r n, a n d a s o m e w h a t so il e d s e t o f t w e n t i e t h - c e n t u r y p o r n o g r a p h i c p h o t o g r a p h s , w h i c h , w h il e n o l o n g e r titillating to t h e m o d e r n m a n, a re well w o r t h a t h o u s a n d d u o - c r e d s as p r i m e , c o m i c nostalgia. Kid, t h e s tr a n g e s t d a m n stuff s h o w s u p in t h e g a r b a g e , s o m e t i m e s so s t r a n g e you w o n ' t b e li eve it. Just r e m e m b e r t h a t t h e r e a re thirty million p e o p l e in this d a m n hive, a n d t h a t a m o n g t h e m t h e y o w n a n d ac cid en tall y t h r o w o u t a b o u t a n y t h i n g a m a n c o u l d h o p e t o find. I d e l i v e r e d t h e d i n n e r w a r e , la nt e rn a n d p o r n o g r a p h y to Pet r o n e , t h e family f e n c e , a n d t h e n g o t my ass o n t h e m o v e. I was t w e n t y m i n u t e s b e h i n d t h e day's s c h e d u l e . At 2:15, I m e t a ma n n a m e d T a l m a d g e at a sleazy little d r u g b a r in o n e of t h e less p l e a s a n t e n t e r t a i n m e n t districts o n t h e forty-sixth level. He w a s sitting at a t a b l e in a d a r k c o r n e r , c l a s p ing his w a t e r p i p e in b o t h h a n d s a n d st ari ng d o w n a t t h e m o u t h p i e c e t h a t a p p e a r e d t o h a v e fallen f r om his lips t o t h e t a b l e t o p . " S o r ry I'm l a t e , " I said. He l o o k e d u p, d r e a m y - e y e d , s mi l e d at m e m o r e t h a n he h ad t o, a n d said, " Th a t ' s all right. I'm f ee l ing fine, j ust f i n e. " " G o o d for y o u , " I said. " But ar e y ou f ee ling t o o fine to g o t h r o u g h with t hi s? " " N o , n o ! " he said. " I ' v e w a ite d m u c h t o o lo n g already, months and m onths— even years!" " C o m e o n , t h e n , " I said. 91
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I t o o k h im o u t o f t h e d r u g b a r a n d h e l p e d him b o a r d a p ubl ic b el tw ay t h a t t o o k us q ui ckly away f r o m t h e e n t e r t a i n m e n t z o n e a n d d e e p into a resi denti al a r e a o n t h e s a m e level. Leani ng c l o se t o m e , in a st ag e w h i s p e r , as if h e e n j o y e d t h e role of a c o n s p i r a t o r , T a l m a d g e said, "Tell m e again h o w big t h e a p a r t m e n t is." I l o o k e d a r o u n d , s aw t ha t n o o n e w as c lo se t o us, a n d , k n o w ing t h a t h e w o u l d just g r o w l o u d e r a n d m o r e b o i s t e r o u s if I r e f u s e d t o s p e a k of it, I said, " T h r e e t i me s as large as r e g u l a ti ons p e r m i t a si ngle m a n like y o u . It has n i n e r o o m s a n d t wo baths." " A nd I d o n ' t h a ve t o s h a r e t h e b a t hs ? " "Of course not." He was ecstatic. N o w, kid, this is t h e r a c ke t you'll b e st ar ting o u t in to ge t s o m e e x p e r i e n c e in t h e b u s i n e s s , a n d y o u s h o u l d pay especi all y c los e a t t e n t i o n . Even w h e n y o u r m o t h e r wa s alive, w e ha d a b i gg e r a p a r t m e n t t h a n city r eg ul at io ns p e r mi t ; n o w , with y o u r m o t h e r g o n e , it's m u c h b i g g e r t h a n a l l ow e d. H o w was this a c h i e v e d , this lavish suite? Si mple. W e b o u g h t u p t h e small a p a r t m e n t s all a r o u n d this, k n o c k e d o u t walls, refitted a n d r e d e c o r a t e d . T h e n , t h r o u g h a falsification of l and r e c o r d s in t h e city real e s t a t e office, w e m a d e it l o o k as if t h e o u t s iz e a p a r t m e n t ha d always b e e n h e r e , w a s a fl uke in t h e original d e s i g n s . N o w , a l t h o u g h living s p a c e is a t a p r e m i u m , a n d t h o u g h t h e city tries to f o rc e e v e r y o n e into relatively similar a c c o m m o d a t i o n s , t h e g o v e r n m e n t repai r r o b o t s a re far t o o b u s y t o h av e t h e t i m e t o s e c t i o n u p t h e large a p a r t m e n t , t h r o w u p n e w walls a n d s o forth. I ns te a d, b e c a u s e this s o r t of t h i n g h a p p e n s s o s e l d o m , t h e city allows t h e o v e rs i ze a p a r t m e n t to exist a n d m e r e l y d o u b l e s o r triples t h e tax a s s e s s m e n t o n w h o e v e r lives t h e r e . In a city of fifteen million a p a r t m e n t s , y ou can pull a h us t le like this at least t wi ce a m o n t h , w i t h o u t d r a w i n g ‘ u n d u e official c o n c e r n , a n d y ou c an cl ea n u p a very t idy s um f ro m rich folks w h o n e e d m o r e t h a n t h e legal living s p a c e. At 2:38, Mr. T a l m a d g e a n d I a rrived at t h e e n t r a n c e t o his 92
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n e w h o m e , k ey e d it a n d w e n t inside. I t o o k him o n a g r a n d t o u r of t h e place, w a i t e d w hi le h e c h e c k e d t h e Tri-D fakevi ew in all t h e r o o m s , t e s t e d t h e b e d s , f l u s h e d t h e t oilets in b o t h j o h n s , a n d finally paid m e t h e m o n e y y e t o u t s t a n d i n g o n o u r c o n tr a ct . In r e t u r n , I g ave him his o w n e r s h i p p a p e r s , c o p i e s of t h e falsified real e s t a t e claims, a n d his first tax a s s e s s m e n t . At 3:00, half an h o u r b e h i n d s c h e d u l e , I g o t o u t of t h e r e . O n my way u p t o t h e offices of Bol doni a n d Gia, in t h e s t a n d a r d e l e va tor , I h ad t i me t o c at ch a n e w s flash o n t h e c o m s c r e e n , a n d it w as s u c h b a d n e w s t h a t it s h a t t e r e d t h e hell o u t of my s c h e d u l e . You h e a r d a b o u t it. Ms. a n d Mr. P o t e m k i n , my first clients of t h e day, w e r e a p p r e h e n d e d in t h e i r a t t e m p t t o s n e a k o u t of t h e city t h r o u g h t h e s e w a g e service pipes. Th e y ac c id e nt al ly ran into a c r e w of m a i n t e n a n c e r o b ot s w h o g av e pu rs ui t. T h e y 'd o nl y just t h e n b e e n b r o u g h t t o city police h e a d q u a r t e r s , b u t t h e y w o u l d n ' t n e e d l on g t o fold up u n d e r a stiff i n t e rr o ga t io n . I c a n c e l e d my original d e s t i n a t i o n o n t h e e l e v a t o r b o a r d , p u n c h e d o u t t h e t w e n t y - s i x t h l evel a n d d r o p p e d d o w n in ag o ni zi ng l y s l o w m o t i o n , w i s h i n g to hell I'd u s e d t h e e x p r e s s drop. At 3:11, I r o d e by t h e offices of Cargill Ma r ri a g e C o u n s e l i n g , w h i c h w a s t h e f ro nt I u s e d for selling r o u t e s o u t of t h e city to p e o p l e like t h e P o t e m k i n s . The place d i d n ' t s e e m t o b e u n d e r su rv ei l l an ce , so I c a m e b ac k o n a n o t h e r b el tway, o p e n e d u p, w e n t i n si de a n d se t t o w o r k . I o p e n e d t h e safe, t o o k o u t w h a t c r e d s I h a d b u n d l e d t h e r e , s tuf fe d half a d o z e n d i f f er en t m a p s in my p o c k e t s , l o o k e d a r o u n d t o b e s u r e I'd n o t left a n y t h i n g of va lu e b e h i n d , t h e n s e t fire t o t h e p l ac e a n d b e a t it o u t of t h e r e . I ha d always u s e d t h e n a m e Cargill in that racket , a n d I'd always w o r n t r a n s p a r e n t plastic f inger ti p shie lds t o k e e p f r om leaving pri nt s; h o w e v e r , o n e c an n e v e r b e t o o careful, kid. At 3:47, I r o d e b a c k ups t ai rs t o t h e offices of Boldoni a n d Gia, c h e c k e d o n t h e be lt wa y r ep a ir j o b with Lew, w h o had r e t u r n e d t o t h e office. It wa s g o i n g well; t h e profit w o u l d k e e p 93
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Boldoni a n d Ci a in t h e black; w e ' r e always in t h e black; w e s e e t o t hat . I s e n t a m a n d o w n to s e e K. O. Wil son b e f o r e shifts c h a n g e d , t h e n d ia le d t h e n u m b e r for Mr. Lincoln Pliney ( w ho is m e , y o u recall), o n t h e fifty-ninth fl oor in t h e C h e s t e r f i el d District. T he r o b o s e c a n s w e r e d o n a cut-in, a n d I a s k e d for m e s s a g e s . In a metallic vo ic e, t h e r o b o s e c said, " M r . A r t h u r C o l e m a n just s t o p p e d in a n d a s k e d for an a p p o i n t m e n t , sir." " C o l e m a n ? I just t a l ke d t o him this m o r n i n g . " "Yes, sir. But h e left a n u m b e r for y o u . " I t o o k t h e n u m b e r , h u n g u p , di al ed C o l e m a n a n d said hello a n d identi fi ed myself t o him. He said, "Eileen a n d I w a n t t o go t h r o u g h wi th t h e d e a l . " " Y o u ' v e j ust m e t e a c h o t h e r , " I said. "I k n o w , b u t I t h i n k w e ' r e p e r f e c t for e a c h o t h e r . " I said, " W h a t d o e s Eileen t h i n k ? " " T h e s a m e as I d o , of c o u r s e . " "In o n e a f t e r n o o n , you c a n 't learn e n o u g h a b o u t e ach other— " C o l e m a n said, "It' s t r u e l o v e . " I said, " We l l, it's o b v i o us l y t r u e s o m e t h i n g . " " W e ' d like t o finalize t h i n g s t o n i g h t . " "Impossible." " T h e n we'll g o s o m e w h e r e e l s e . " " To w h o m ? " "We 'l l find s o m e o n e , " h e said. I said, "You'll find s o m e i n c o m p e t e n t criminal h a c k wh o' ll b o t c h t h e falsification of Eileen's d e a t h certificate, a n d in t h e e n d you'll have t o tell t h e poli ce a b o u t m e . " He d i d n ' t r e s p o n d . " O h , h e l l! " I s n a p p e d . " M e e t m e in my C h es t e r f i e l d District office in half an h o u r , with Eileen." 1 h u n g up. I'd i n t e n d e d t o s e e a m a n w h o w a n t e d t o p u r c h a s e a falsified Neutral Status Pass t o k e e p him safe f r om d u e l c h a l l en g es . See, kid, t h e r e ar e a lot of p e o p l e w h o a r e he al t hy e n o u g h 94
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t o h a ve t o go a r m e d b u t w h o w a n t t o avoid h avi ng t o a c c e p t c h a l l e n g e s . T h e g o v e r n m e n t has n o s y m p a t h y with t h e m a n d fo r c es t h e m t o c o m p l y wit h t h e s y s t em. I'm always r eady, h o w ev e r, t o give t h e m a p a p e r disability t o k e e p t h e m w h o l e a n d s a n e . I s y m p a t h i z e with r eb el s, like I said. An d t h e r e ' s a profit in it, t o o . Anyway, I ha d t o call t h e g uy w h o w a n t e d t h e Neutral Status Pass a n d p o s t p o n e o u r a p p o i n t m e n t until t o m o r r o w . T h e n I ran off t o tie t h e nuptial k n o ts for C o l e m a n a n d his lady. You s e e , n o w, w h y I w a s late g e t ti n g h o m e . Scare y ou ? I d i d n ' t t h i n k it w o u l d . T o m o r r o w , y ou ca n c o m e a l o n g with m e , w a t c h m e w o r k , pick u p s o m e t ips a b o u t t h e b u s i ne s s . Y o u 'r e fifteen, p le nt y old e n o u g h to learn. I tell y o u , kid, y o u ' r e g o i n g t o b e a natural for this b u s i n e s s . I wi sh y o u r m o t h e r c o u l d h av e lived t o s e e w h a t kind of d a u g h t e r s h e b r o u g h t into this wor ld. Well, kid, y o u b e t t e r t u r n in. It's g o i n g to b e a b u s y day.
95
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A p a rtm e n t Hunting HARVEY A N D AUDREY BILKER
"Name?” " M r . a n d Mrs. Ch a rl e s R e a r d o n , " h e said. "Address?" " W e s t Ce nt ral Park C o m p l e x Se ve nt y - Fo u r , A p a r t m e n t A21L." T he cl er k w as a b o r e d w o m a n b e t w e e n twent y- fi ve a n d thirty. Her finger s w e r e s m u d g e d f r o m a m o r n i n g of filling o u t f or ms in t riplicate a n d q u a d r u p l i c a t e for c o m p u t e r c o d i n g . C h a r l es R e a r d o n ' s wife s t o o d by him, h e r y o u n g face b r ig ht with h o p e for t h e i r f u t u r e life t o g e t h e r . At last, af ter five year s of a p p l i c a ti on s , t h e D e p a r t m e n t of D e m o g r a p h y ha d r e l e as e d n e w statistics a n d t h e resul t wa s t h a t t h e R e a r d o n s h a d b e e n p u t o n t h e list for a n e w a p a r t m e n t . Twice, until n o w , t h e i r a p p r o v e d b u t c o n t i n g e n t li c ense for c o n c e p t i o n h a d e x p i r e d a n d t h e y d e s p e r a t e l y w a n t e d a child. But w i t h o u t t h e c o m p l e m e n t a r y a cq ui si t i on of an a p a r t m e n t with a n o t h e r b e d r o o m t h e p e r m i t w as of n o use. W h e n t h e l o n g f or m ha d b e e n filled o u t a l m o s t in its en ti r e ty , t h e c ler k a s k e d , " H a v e y ou g o t y o u r A p a r t m e n t Entry a n d P o s s e ss io n Kit?" " N o , " R e a r d o n re pl ie d. " T h e y said w e have t o h av e t h e P o t e n tial T e n a n t Form first." " I ' m s o r r y, " t h e cl er k t ol d t h e m . "I c a n ' t c o m p l e t e this u n t i l ' y ou h av e t h e o t h e r o n e . " " B ut t h a t ' s r i d i c u l o u s , " Mrs. R e a r d o n c o m p l a i n e d . T h e clerk s h r u g g e d h e r s h o u l d e r s a n d p u t t h e p a p e r s asi de. " T h o s e ar e t h e r u l e s . " 96
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" B u t w e w e r e notified t h a t this is t h e o nl y d a y w e c an l ook for an a p a r t m e n t , " t h e wife e x p l a i n e d . " T h e fax let ter t h e y s e n t said t h at if w e d i d n ' t c o m p l e t e e v e r y t h i n g t o d a y — i n c lu d in g t a k i ng p o s s e s s i o n —w e c o u l d n ' t r ea p pl y for at least t w o years. The wa it i ng list is t h a t l o n g . " T he cl er k gave t h e m a ti r ed s mile. " E v e r y b o d y ' s g o t t h e s a m e p r o b l e m . T h e r e ' s n o t h i n g I can d o . " Reardon spoke up. "W ha t do the others do?" "T h e y ge t a Re s i d e n c e I nt er f ace F o r m , " t h e c le rk said. " D i d n ' t y ou k n o w a b o u t that? It allows y o u t o ap pl y for all y o u r p e r mi t s in a n y o r d e r . " R e a r d o n b e g a n t o reply gent ly, b u t his wi f e' s l o u d a n d n o w irritated voi ce o v e r w h e l m e d his p o l i t en e ss . " T h e r e w as n o t h i n g in t h e i ns t r uc t io n s a b o u t it," s h e a n n o u n c e d . "I s t u d i e d t h e m carefully. W e w e r e wa it ing o u t s i d e this office f r om 0500 h o u r s — in line. W e w a n t e d t o h av e e n o u g h t i me t o l oo k for a place. N o w w e ' v e lost a c o u p l e of h o u r s . " The clerk ta p p e d her fingers impatiently, looking b e h in d t h e m at t h e n ex t wai ti ng c o u p l e . "All I can say is g e t t h e Resi d e n c e I nt e rf ac e Form. T h e n I c an p u t this t h r o u g h . " Mrs. R e a r d o n ' s e x p r e s s i o n t u r n e d a l m o s t ani mal . H er h u s b a n d p u t a pla ca ti n g h a n d o n h e r s h o u l d e r . " T h e r e ' s n o u s e a r g u in g , d a r l i n g , " h e tol d h e r softly. "You'll onl y w as t e t i me . Rules a re r u l e s . " He l o o k e d ap ol og et ic al ly at t h e clerk. " W h e r e d o w e g e t t h e R e s i d e n c e I nter face For m?" "It' s in this b u i l d i n g , " s h e re pl ie d, s o m e w h a t mollified by R e a r d o n ' s a t t i t u d e . " I ' m n o t s u r e w h i c h r o o m , t h o u g h . You mi g h t try 1173." " T h a n k y o u , " h e re pl ie d. He led his a ng r y wife o u t . T he line o n t h e inside ha d r e a c h e d t h e d o o r a n d c o n t i n u e d partly d o w n t h e hall o u t s i d e . Th e y s t e p p e d o n t o t h e w o r n plastic ver tizont al p e d - t r e d a n d got off at 1173. At least t h e wait t h e r e w a s n ' t t o o long. H o w e v e r , t h e y d i s c o v e r e d , w h e n t h e i r t u r n c a m e , t h a t it w a s n ' t 1173 at all w h e r e t h e R e s i d e n c e I nt e rf ac e For ms w e r e o b t a i n e d ; it was 1834. But at 1834, f ol ow¡ ng a l o n g delay, t h e y w e r e i n f o r m e d t h at 97
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2021 w as t h e p r o p e r pl ace for w h a t t h e y w e r e s e e k in g . At 2021 t h e y w e r e s e n t t o 1219. An d at 1219 t h e y w e r e given i n s tr u c t i o n s t h a t b r o u g h t t h e m full circle b a c k t o t h e clerk t h e y h ad s e e n originally. This t i m e s h e d i r e c t e d t h e m t o 1416. For t u n a te l y, it t u r n e d o u t to b e t h e c o r r e c t place. They w e r e finally s e a t e d o p p o s i t e a s c r a t c h e d a n d p o c k e d a l u m ¡ n u m - t i t a n ¡ u m - t u n g s t e n d e s k , o n e of m a n y in a large r o o m t h a t h a d n ' t b e e n s u r f a c e - c o a t e d for year s. A m a n w h o was p r e m a t u r e l y t i m e w o r n slowly w e n t a b o u t p r e p a r i n g t h e n e c e ssa ry f o r m . “ You y o u n g fo lk s, " h e said, at t h e s a m e ti me m a k i n g n o t a t i o n s in va ri ou s b loc ks . " S o a n x i o u s t o g e t a b i g g e r place. W h a t d i f f e r e n c e d o e s it m a k e anyway? So you'll have y o u r p e r m i t t e d child. So w h a t? W h a t d o e s it all m e a n ? " He l o o k e d u p . T he R e a r d o n s c o u l d s ee , d e e p in his e y es , t h e m a n y year s of d a r k t h o u g h t s . " T h e n you'll b e fifty-five— a n d it'll b e all o v e r . " He n o d d e d his h e a d at t h e m s o m b e r l y . “ I'll b e fiftyfive n e x t year. T h e n w h a t ? " H e s n o r t e d a n d b o u n c e d his h e a d u p a n d d o w n . T h e n h e r e t u r n e d t o his w or k . Finally, h e t o r e o u t t h e i r c o p y a n d h a n d e d it slowly t o t h e m . Mrs. R e a r d o n g r a b b e d it f r o m his h a n d . " Q u i c k , " s h e said t o h e r h u s b a n d . "Let' s ge t b a c k . " Sh e l o o k e d at h e r w a t ch . " O h , my G o d ! It's a l m o s t 1300 h o u r s ! " " Ju st relax, h o n e y , " R e a r d o n said, g e s t u r i n g calmly with a s p r e a d - f i n g e r e d h a n d . “ Everything will w o r k o u t all r ig ht . " But s h e was a l r e a d y o n h e r w ay o u t of t h e office a n d h e w as f ol lowi ng after, trying t o k e e p up. W h e n t h e y r e t u r n e d t o t h e office t h e y h a d g o n e t o in t h e first pla ce , t h e y w e r e a bl e t o g e t in a s h o r t e r line b e c a u s e t h e Potential T e n a n t Form h a d b e e n a l m o s t c o m p l e t e l y filled o u t t h a t m o r n i n g . At least t h e y d i d n ' t have t o start o v e r again; t h e line t h e y h a d w a i t e d in d u r i n g t h e m o r n i n g w as n o w a l m o s t c o m p l e t e l y a r o u n d t h e o u t s i d e hall. It w as pas t 1430 h o u r s w h e n t h e y w e r e at last a b l e t o p r e s e n t ’ t h e R e s i d e n c e I n te rf ac e Form. T he y o u n g girl w h o t o o k it a p p e a r e d to h av e j ust g r a d u a t e d f r o m a g o v e r n m e n t t e c h n o l o g y s c h o o l . After a b o u t t e n m i n u t e s , 98
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s h e w a s still a w k w ar d l y c h e c k i n g t h r o u g h t h e e l e c t r o n i c files. Mrs. R e a r d o n , e x a s p e r a t e d , l o o k e d at t h e d u s t y digital wall clock. " Y o u n g l ady, " s h e called. " W h a t ' s t h e p r o b l e m ? " T h e girl w a l k e d b a c k t o t h e c o u n t e r , h e r facial e x p r e s s i o n s h o w i n g signs of c o n f u s i o n in its b l a n k n e s s . "I c a n ' t find y o u r Potential T e n a n t Fo r m. " "It probably hasn't been k e y p u n ch ed yet," the married w o m a n told h e r bitterly. " T h a t cler k o v e r t h e r e is t h e o n e w h o filled it o u t . " S h e p o i n t e d partly d o w n t h e large r o o m . " W h y d o n ' t y o u ask h e r ? " " I ' m n o t a l l o w ed t o leave my d e p a r t m e n t , " t h e girl e x p la i ne d . " B u t it'll o n l y t a k e a m o m e n t t h a t w a y , " M r s . R e a r d o n s h o u t e d . " Y o u ' r e just several m e t e r s away f r o m h er . O t h e r wi se , you'll b e l oo ki n g all d a y . " "Now, dear," Reardon intervened. " B u t s h e ' s w a s t i n g o u r v al ua bl e t i m e ! " his wife r e p li e d irasci bly. " D o n ' t y ou realize w e have o nl y a little o v e r t w o h o u r s now to get th e apartm ent?" T h e girl l o o k e d at Mr. R e a r d o n . At least h e u n d e r s t o o d h e r p r o b l e m s . "I'll l o ok a g a i n , " s h e o f f e r e d g e n e r o u s l y . Wh i le t h e girl s e a r c h e d t h e e l ec t r o n i c files agai n, Mrs. Rear d o n , b e y o n d h e r p a t i e n c e , s u m m e d u p h e r f eel ings by p o u n d ing lightly o n t h e c o u n t e r . Ffer h u s b a n d a t t e m p t e d to a s s u a g e h e r a nxi et ies, b u t t o n o avail. At last, t w e n t y m i n u t e s later, t h e girl c a m e o v e r with t h e familiar for m. " R e a r d o n ? " s h e a s k e d happily. "Yes, R e a r d o n ," t h e wife said, h e r t o n e ster n. "It was just lying o n a pile o n t h e t a b l e . " T he girl giggled. " N o w , may I h a v e y o u r R e s i d e n c e Interface Form, p l e a s e? " s h e a s k e d rout i nely. R e a r d o n gave it t o h e r a n d s h e o p e n e d a c o m p a r t m e n t filled with r u b b e r s t a m p s . After m o r e f ¡ l l i n g o u t , s i g n i n g a n d c o u n t e r s i g n i n g , a n d s t a m p ing, t h e p a p e r s w e r e c o m p l e t e . " N e x t , " t h e girl a d v i s e d , " You have t o g e t y o u r A p a r t m e n t Entry a n d P o s s e s s i o n Kit." 99
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“ It's a b o u t t i m e ! " Mrs. R e a r d o n e x c la i m e d a l m o s t wit h a snarl. “ First, t h o u g h , " t h e girl said, “ I n e e d y o u r T rans¡ st -l dent C a rd s . A n d t h e n p l e a se s t a n d in f ro nt of t h o s e s c a n s c r e e n s so I c an m a t c h u p y o u r p hy si ol ogy p a t t e r n s t o t h e s e c a r d s . " Mrs. R e a r d o n was at t h e e n d of h e r t e t h e r a n d t h r o u g h h e r t e e t h said, "Is t h a t really n e c e s s a r y ? " " Y e s , " t h e girl r ep l ie d dully. It was o b v i o u s t h a t s h e ha d a n s w e r e d t h a t q u e s t i o n m a n y t i me s b e f o r e . " P e o p l e d o b o r r o w cards." After t h e t e s t c h e c k e d o u t , Mrs. R e a r d o n gave t h e girl a self-satisfied scowl , b u t it w e n t u n n o t i c e d . T h e y o u n g s t e r just continued her routine procedure. T h e girl p o i s e d a f inge r o v e r a m a c h i n e o n t h e c o u n t e r ; t h e finish o n t h e t er mi na l w a s c h i p p e d a n d p e e l in g . " N o w , " s h e said, t a p p i n g b u t t o n s as s h e e n t e r e d in fo r ma t io n f ro m t h e f o r m s , "I'll p u t this d a t a into t h e c o n s o l e . " As s o o n as s h e h a d c o m p l e t e d t h e ent ry, t h e i nt eri or of t h e m a c h i n e b e g a n t o clat ter a n d a p r i n t - o u t e m e r g e d . S h e t o r e off t h e s h e e t a n d p r e s e n t e d it t o t h e c o u p l e . " T o d a y ' s l i s t i n g , " s h e s a i d, " is ent irely o f p e o p l e w h o have n o t v o l u n t e e r e d t o v a ca te t he ir apartments." R e a r d o n d i s a p p o i n t e d l y c l a m p e d his lips tight a n d s h o o k his h e a d . " Ju st o u r l u c k ! " h e said, d i s g u s t e d . " T h e o n e da y w e g e t for an a p a r t m e n t a n d e ve ry o n e o n o u r list is o c c u p i e d . " "It' s b e t t e r t h a n n o a p a r t m e n t , " his s p o u s e said t o him, d e t e r mi na ti on in h e r voi ce. "At least w e h ave a c h a n c e . " Th e girl l e a n e d h e r h e a d o v e r t h e neatly p r i n t e d s e n t e n c e s on t h e p r i n t - o u t s h e e t , w h i c h w e r e u p s i d e d o w n t o h er . " You h av e t o m a k e y o u r c h o i c e at this t i me . I'll p u t a h o l d o n it until 1700 h o u r s . " Eagerly, Mrs. R e a r d o n p e r u s e d t h e list as h e r h u s b a n d tried t o s e e o v e r h e r ar m. He p o i n t e d t o o n e line. " L o o k at this o n e . It's j us t a f e w b lo cks f ro m w h e r e w e live n o w . " His wife i g n o r e d him until s h e h a d f o u n d a listing t o he r o w n liking. " H e r e ' s an a p a r t m e n t t h a t ' s in t h e Riverside Park Complex!"
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" D o y o u k n o w h o w o l d t h o s e a r e ? " R e a r d o n a s k e d coolly. " T h e y w e r e built in '25." " T h a t ' s j us t t h e p o i n t , " s h e r e p l i e d , s m i l i n g a n d e x c i t e d . "They have two-and-a-half-m eter-high ceilings— a quarter m e t e r h i g h e r t h a n t h e n e w legal m i n i m u m . " T he girl i n t e r r u p t e d . " Yo u h ave t o m a k e u p y o u r m i n d s , " s h e said mechani call y. " T h e r e ar e o t h e r s w ai t i n g . " "All r i g h t ," Mrs. R e a r d o n said. "We 'l l t a k e this o n e . " She p o i n t e d t o t h e s h e e t . As an a f t e r t h o u g h t , s h e t u r n e d t o he r h u s b a n d . "Is t ha t all right with y o u ? " " Y e s , " h e a g r e e d . "I d o n ' t w a n t to b e r e s p o n s i b l e for pi cking o u t s o m e t h i n g y o u w o n ' t b e satisfied w i t h . " " Ve ry w e l l , " t h e c ler k t ol d t h e m , at t h e s a m e t i m e p u n c h i n g several m o r e b u t t o n s o n h e r te rmi n a l . H er voice b e c a m e a m o n o t o n e as s h e r e e l e d off i n st ru c ti on s. " You m u s t let us k n o w by t h e a p a r t m e n t c o m m u n i c a t o r e q u i p m e n t th a t y o u 'v e o b t a i n e d t h e a p a r t m e n t . An d it m u s t b e b e f o r e 1700 h o u r s b e c a u s e of t h e Geriatric Fa¡r-Play Law. H e r e ' s y o u r c o d e . " She h a n d e d t h e m a car d o n w h i c h s h e ha d m a d e a n o t a t i o n . " W h e n t h e m e s s a g e is r ec e iv e d , t e n a n c y will b e officially r e c o r d e d u n d e r y o u r n a m e . Try n o t t o d o t o o m u c h d a m a g e o b t a i n i n g t h e uni t— u n l e s s it's a b s o l u t e l y n e ce s s a r y . I m m e d i at e l y with y o u r call, of c o u r s e , a re mo va l t e a m will b e s e n t o v e r . " O n c e again t h e R e a r d o n s f o u n d t h e m s e l v e s in t h e c e n t e r of t h e b u i ld i ng 's activity. T h ey b o a r d e d t h e p e d - t r e d for a trip to, h o pe f ul ly , t h e last d e p a r t m e n t t h a t t h e y h a d t o visit. After m o r e wai t ing, at 1515 h o u r s t h e y w e r e h a n d e d a car ryi ng case. T he b a g ' s e x t e ri o r w as ba dl y s cu ff ed a n d t h e seals w e r e n o longer secure. R e a r d o n g r i n n e d at his wife. " O k a y , let's g o . " " O h , n o ! " s h e r epl ied. " N o t until I c h e c k this t o s e e t ha t e v e r y t h i n g is h e r e . " Th ey t o o k t h e c as e a s id e , as t h e line m o v e d f o r w a r d , a n d o p e n e d it. Past ed o n t h e in si d e of t h e b a t t e r e d lid wa s a s h e e t of p a p e r t h a t h a d c u r l e d away at t h e c o r n e r s . Mrs. R e a r d o n r ead t h e list of c o m p o n e n t s f r om it a n d w e n t t h r o u g h -each item in t h e 101
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v a r i o u s c o m p a r t m e n t s . “ A h a ! ” s h e e x c l a i m e d . “ J us t w h a t I thought!" S he f o r c e d h e r way b ac k into line— in f ro nt o f t h e p e r s o n w h o w as n o w first. " T h e c u t t e r is m is s i n g , " s h e told t h e m a n b e h i n d t h e c o u n t e r w h o h a d i s s u e d t h e kit. He t o o k a s h e e t f r o m o n e of t h e piles of p a p e r s n ex t to him a n d g av e it t o her . "Fill this o u t , " h e said. "No, sir!" she a n n o u n c e d . "You're not going to push me a r o u n d . Give m e a c u t t e r f r o m a n o t h e r kit o r give m e a n e w kit." "I c a n ' t d o t ha t, m a ' a m , " h e repl ied. "We ll , y o u ' d b e t t e r ! " Mrs. R e a rd on t ol d hi m. " O r e ls e I'm g o i n g t o s t a nd right h e r e a n d n o t let a n y b o d y g e t in f ro n t of m e ! " " You ca n c o m p l a i n t o t h e d e p a r t m e n t h e a d , if y o u ' d like," t h e e m p l o y e e a dv is e d in a matt er-of-fact t o n e . "I'll d o it my w a y , " t h e w o m a n said a d a ma n t l y. "It' s t h e on ly way t o ge t r es ul t s . " " L o ok , l ady, " said t h e ma n s h e h a d p u s h e d as id e. "I w a n t t o ge t t a k e n c a r e of. You g o t t a follow t h e p r o p e r p r o c e d u r e s . That's w h a t / did. A n d t h e day's a l m o s t o v e r . " "Exactly!" Mrs. R e a rd o n t ol d hi m. "Tha t' s w h y I'm g o i n g to s t a n d h e r e — until 1700 h o u r s , if n e c e s s a r y . " A n u m b e r of p e o p l e in line b e g a n t o s h o u t at h e r, b u t s h e s t o o d fast, s t o n e - f a c e d . T he m a n w h o h a d b e e n first in line was e x a s p e r a t e d . " L o o k , " h e said t o t h e e m p l o y e e , " c a n ' t y o u give it t o her? O t h e r w i s e , n o n e of us'll e v e r g e t a p a r t m e n t s . " "I c a n ' t " was his reply. " I ' m n o t p e r m i t t e d to. W e h av e to k e e p ex a ct i n v e n t o r y r e c o r d s . " "All right, l ady, " said t h e m a n w h o s e t u r n was next. "I'll tell y ou w h a t. You can h ave t h e o n e fr om my kit. I'm s u r e I can m a k e d o with t h e o t h e r t o o ls . At least if y ou ge t w h a t y ou w a n t , t h e rest of us h e r e c an have a c h a n c e . " Mrs. R e a rd o n a g r e e d t o his s u g g e s t i o n , a n d w h e n h e g o t his kit, he o p e n e d it, t o o k o u t t h e c u t t e r , a n d g av e it t o her.
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S he s mi l e d t o h e rs e l f wit h satisfaction, n o t e v e n b o t h e r i n g t o t h a n k t h e m a n . " H e r e , ” s h e said t o h e r h u s b a n d . " P u t this in o u r kit a n d let's g e t o u t of h e r e . W e h av e onl y a b o u t an h o u r left.” O n Traffic Level # 3 / N o r t h t h e y f o u n d a c a b p o r t a t ¡ o n t e rmi na l b o x a n d signaled. After a l m o s t fifteen m i n u t e s , t h e i r c o n v e y o r railed up . They g o t in a n d R e a r d o n g a v e t h e a d d r e s s t o t h e p u d g y - f a c e d operator. Traffic was e x t r e m e l y he av y s i nc e it w a s t h e e n d of t h e s e c o n d daily w o r k p e r i o d , a n d t h e y arrived at t h e a p a r t m e n t h o u s e with j us t a q u a r t e r of an h o u r t o go. T h e wait for t h e small, c r e a k i n g vert¡ p e d - t r e d was a g o n i z i n g , b u t it c a m e at last. Finally, t h e y r e a c h e d t h e i r d e s t i n a t i o n — t h e f or ti et h floor. "I t' s 40K-5," Mrs. R e a r d o n said, r u s h i n g d o w n t h e t h r e a d b a r e hall c a r p e t , h e r h u s b a n d p a d d i n g h u r r i e d l y a ft er h e r . T h e y l o c at e d t h e c o r r e c t d o o r quickly. R e a r d o n k n o c k e d . " O p e n up , p l e a s e . ” " N o , ” c a m e a shy, w e a k f e m a l e voice. " Y o u ' r e n o t g e tt i n g i n. " " B r ea k it d o w n , " Mrs. R e a r d o n o r d e r e d resol ut ely. H e r h u s b a n d s t o o d back, t h e n ran a ga in st t h e d o o r several t i me s with his full w e i g h t . But h e w a s n ' t s ucces sf ul . In t h e m e a n t i m e , Mrs. R e a r d o n h a d o p e n e d t h e kit a n d w as r u m m a g ing t h r o u g h t h e e q u i p m e n t . " H e r e , try t h e s e , " s h e i n s t r uc t e d, h a n d i n g him a large ring o f keys. He l o o k e d q ui ckl y t h r o u g h t h e m . " T h e r e just isn't e n o u g h t i m e to find o n e t h a t m i g h t w o r k . ” " Y e s . ” His wife n o d d e d . S h e c h e c k e d h e r w a t ch . "If w e d o n ' t call in by 1700 h o u r s , w e ' r e di squal if ied. Y o u' d b e t t e r s h o o t it o p e n . " S h e t o o k t h e g u n f ro m t h e kit a n d gave it t o him. He p u t t h e w e a p o n t o t h e lock a n d fired. Metal a n d w o o d f r a g m e n t s c l o u d e d b a c k in a slight ha ze . He p u s h e d t h e d o o r , b u t it s t o p p e d slightly ajar. " S h e ' s g ot o n e of t h o s e real old c ha i n s o n ! " h e said d e s p e r a t e l y . " O n l y five m i n u t e s ! ” his wife w a r n e d . " H u r r y ! " 103
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" G iv e m e t h e c u t t e r , " h e said t o her. Wi th a smi rk, s h e h a n d e d it t o him. " S e e , I w a s right w h e n I p u t u p a fight f o r t h i s. " R e a r d o n h o o k e d t h e c u t t e r a r o u n d t h e chai n a n d t u r n e d it o n . Slowly, t h e i n s t r u m e n t b e g a n t o p e n e t r a t e a link. T h e n , finally, t h e c h ai n s e p a r a t e d a n d its s e v e r e d e n d s c l a tt e r e d apart. " T h a n k G o d ! " Mrs. R e a r d o n b r e a t h e d . N ow , with e a s e , t h e y b o t h p u s h e d t h e d o o r c o m p l e t e l y o p e n . In f r o nt of a w i n d o w , in a soft chai r of a n c i e n t v in t ag e , its p a d d i n g w o r n a n d f a d e d , sat a w o m a n with grayish hair. She m u s t h ave b e e n y o u n g n o t t o o long a go , it s e e m e d . In fact, h e r f e a t u r e s w e r e n ' t really t h a t a g e d . A fair s e m b l a n c e of he r y o ut hf ul p a s t w as still e v i d e n t ; in its e x t r e m e y o u t h , h e r a p p e a r a n c e h a d n o d o u b t b e e n s w e e t . H o w e v e r , at t h e si ght of t h e i n t r u d e r s h e r lips t w i s t e d a n d , in an inst ant , y e a rs w e r e a d d e d to her d em eano r. Mrs. R e a r d o n l o o k e d at h e r w a t c h again. " O n l y f ou r m i n u t e s . G e t it o v e r w i t h . " The t e n a n t n o d d e d h e r h e a d with r e s ig na t io n. " S o m e day y o u 'll b e o l d , t o o , " s h e said, " a n d s t r a n g e r s will d o this t o y o u ." T h e n , st rangely, h e r e x p r e s s i o n c h a n g e d , s o f t e n e d . The i nstinct of s el f -p r e se r va ti on a p p e a r e d to h a v e b r o k e n t h r o u g h . " P l e a s e , " s h e p l e a d e d . "Let m e have o n e m o r e d a y . " S h e t u r n e d h e r h e a d slowly t o t h e w i n d o w , w h e r e t h e d yi ng s u n s t r e a m e d in. T h e city b e l o w , its d i s t a n t w h i t e t o w e r s a n d b u il d in g s o n t h e N e w Jersey s id e w e r e s t r e a k e d o r a n g e as t h e sky g av e u p its full e n e r g y . S h e c o n t i n u e d to look at t h e si ght b e f o r e h e r as if s h e w a n t e d t o a b s o r b it into h e r e n t i r e b ei ng . "For G o d ' s s a k e ! " Mrs. R e a r d o n said t o h e r h u s b a n d . " D o n ' t w a s t e a ny m o r e t i m e . " Sh e a n x io u sl y e y e d t h e c o m m u n i c a t o r . R e a r d o n raised t h e g u n a n d a i m e d it a c r o s s t h e r o o m as p r ecisel y as h e c o u l d at t h e w o m a n ' s t e m p l e . A calm h a d n o w c o m e o v e r h e r as s h e c o n t i n u e d t o view, a l m o s t h y p n o t i z e d , t h e b r i g h t l y i l l u m i n a t e d s c e n e o u t s i d e h e r a p a r t m e n t . He r e x p r e s s i o n w as placid ye t e n t h r a l l e d , as if s h e w e r e b e h o l d i n g a treasure. 104
H A R V E Y A N D A U D R E Y BILKER
R e a r d o n ' s e y e s s u d d e n l y b r i m m e d w i t h t e a r s until li q u id l e n s e s so th ic k w e r e f o r m e d t h a t h e h ad t o c l a m p his lids c l o s e d t o r e l ea s e t h e fluid; it ran in w a r m rivulets d o w n his c h e e k s t o his chi n, w h e r e h e c o u l d feel t h e s t r e a m , s u d d e n l y c o o l e d , d r i p p i n g t o his shirt. But his e ye s q ui ckly refilled a n d o n c e m o r e h e h a d t o blink h a r d t o clear t h e vision. It w as i m p o r t a n t for him to s e e a c c u ra t el y — for t h e w o m a n ' s s a ke . "It' s a l m o s t 1700 h o u r s ! " Mrs. R e a r d o n s c r e a m e d . " W e ' v e g ot t o call in o n t h e c o m m u n i c a t o r ! " As R e a r d o n c o n t i n u e d s ig h t in g t h e w o m a n a l o n g t h e barrel of his g u n , s c e n e s of his p as t a n d fantasi es of his f u t u r e s u d d e n l y f l a s h e d b e f o r e his u n s q u i n t e d e y e a n d h e felt his t a u t s h o u l d e r s c ol la ps e. "I c a n ' t , " h e t o ld his wife listlessly, a i m i n g t h e g un h a l f h e ar t e dl y n o w . " I f w e d o n ' t g e t t h e a p a r t m e n t , " h e h e a r d his w i f e cr y, “s o m e o n e e ls e will!" R e a d o n p u l l e d t h e trigger.
105
AS A D R O P
As a D rop D. M. PRICE
as a d r o p o u t , i l ik e s k i e s ; they're b eau tifu l th i n g s t o h a v e h a n g i n g a rou n d. i w a s in o n e o n c e , a t l e a s t, p a r t o f m e w a s , d rif tin g a b o u t the o sm o stic co sm o s, p ro b a b ly s p a t o u t (like m u c h o f p o p u l a t i o n II e v e r y t h i n g ) f r o m s o m e d y s p e p t i c star w h o h a d g a r g le d t o o m u c h h e liu m . so m e tim e s i w o n d er w h o i s h i n e d u p o n , bi-, se x - , o r q u a d r u p e d , but i never w onder b e f o r e dinner. i w a s in t h e s k y o n c e , m i g h t b e again, i m p a r t i n g m y l ig h t s o o n o n m y calcium w a v e l e n g t h as w h i t e as b e f o r e , s o m e w here b e tw e e n here a n d A l g o l' s fiery suburb. 106
VIRGINIA KIDD
A bendländes VIRGINIA KIDD
D e c l i n e o f f o r m a l is m s a v e f o r s t y l i z e d d e c a y S a v e s n o t h i n g ; o n l y n i p s t h e h e e l s a n d harries o n O u r sh a m b lin g end. T here has b e e n tim e sin c e w h e n A s o c i a l rite a t t e n d e d o n b e g i n n i n g s , t h e r e h a s b e e n t i m e For t e r m i t e s a n d f o r ru st. O l d s t r u c t u r e s C r u m b l e , b u t t h e n e w - a n d - l a r g e l ik e t h u n d e r - l i z a r d s Pay t h e p r i c e o f s i z e b e f o r e t h e s k e l e t a l A n d c o m p l i c a t e d s t e e l c a n r e a l iz e fa tig u e . C h e w in g on d o l e d bread, sid e w a lk w atch ers C h e e r g l a d i a t o r s in t h e w r e c k i n g c r e w O r - f e w e r s i n c e t h e b a n d is o u t o f k e y A n d d u l l - e y e d if t h e s p e e c h is o v e r l o n g A p p l a u d a final c o r n e r s t o n e a p p e n d e d t o a f i n i s h e d c h u r c h . N o m i n a l c o m m e n c e m e n t s w h e n t h e t h i n g is d o n e Mark s u b s i d e n c e o f c u ltu r e ; r e t u r n t o s h a p e l e s s n e s s W h ile t h e t o w n s still e m p t y , a n d t h e c it i e s rot.
107
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T he W eariest River TH O M AS N. SCORT1A . . . ol d m e n m u s t die, o r t h e w o r l d w o u l d g r o w m o u l d y , w o u l d on ly b r e e d t h e pas t again. — ALFRED, LORD TENNYSON, B e c k e t
In th e m id d le o f th e alrea d y d e c a y in g city, h e sc re a m e d . It was a q u ie t sc re a m , fille d w ith an a n g u ish th a t s p o k e o f c e n tu rie s o f p a in to c o m e . It to re a t his thro at, rip p in g its s ile n t p a in th r o u g h his larynx a n d v e n tin g its v io le n c e o n a fro ze n air, e x p e n d in g its e n e r g y in a terrible in te rn a l sp a sm o f so rro w fo r th e th o u s a n d s o f r o b o t crea tu res a b o u t h im . T h e y w e re h u m a n - th e s e crea tu res in th e c ity -a n d th a t was th e terrible th in g a b o u t it. T h e y w e re fle sh a n d sq u irm in g viscera a n d p u ls in g b lo o d a n d ly m p h a n d th e y w ere to ta lly . . . c o m p le te ly . . . a g o n iz in g ly u n a w a re o f h im , o f w h a t h e h a d d o n e to th e m . U naw are th a t in th e ir n e w f o u n d c e n tu r ie s o f life, th e y w e re d e s tr o y e d - a s was h e . H e m o v e d th ro u g h th e ir m id s t, p o s itio n in g e a ch fo o t ca refu lly in fro n t o f th e o th e r, p a in fu lly aw are o f th e e ffo rt to c o o rd in a te this s im p le , u n e la b o ra te d , p r im itiv e c o m p le x th a t w as his b o d y . H o w terrible, h e th o u g h t, to b e tr a p p e d fo re v e r in this th in g w ith tw o leg s a n d tw o arm s a n d q u iv e rin g g o n a d s a n d p e rip h era l fu n c tio n a l p arts th a t stir lik e th e p a s s in g fa n ta sy o f fern fro n d s b e fo r e th e w in d s o f th e m o s t casual p h y s ic a l im p u ls e . H o w terrible, h o w terrib le, h o w terrible. H o w terrib le to b e tr a p p e d in th is b o d y , th is h u s k w ith fingers th a t articulate w ith a c lu m s y in te n t, w ith leg s th a t fle x at th e 108
T H O M A S N. S C O R T I A
s lig h te s t e ffo rt, w ith s to m a c h th a t c h u rn s a n d g ro w ls a n d a ch e s, w ith h e a d th a t sw iv e ls id io tic a lly o n c o r d e d n e c k a n d e y e s th a t p e e r a n d b u rn a n d w a te r a n d b lin k a n d s e e little b e y o n d th e im a g e s a fe w fe e t fro m th e m . Forever? S u r e ly n o t forever? " H e y m a n , ” h is m o r ta l fr ie n d sa id . (W h a t w as th is w o r d " frie n d . ”? H e w a s n 't q u ite su re th a t it fitte d th e s e m a n tic c o n te n t o f th e p r e s e n t situ a tio n .) " H e y m a n , y o u lo o k s p a c e d o u t. Real sp a ced o u t.” "I a m ,” h e said. (W as th a t his vo ice? D id it b e lo n g to him ? Was it a p a rt o f his to ta l stru ctu re? T h e r e s o n a n c e , th e vibration, th e fe e lin g o f articulation? A m I w h a t I s a y - m e ? Was th a t H o p kins? N o , " W h a t i d o is m e ; fo r th a t I ca m e . ”) Truth, u n d y in g tru th . . . ' 7 c a u g h t th is m o r n in g m o rn in g 's m in io n , k in g d o m o f d a y lig h t's d a u p h in . . . ” "I a m in a b a d w a y ," h e sa id slo w ly . "I a m r e m e m b e r in g .” " T hat's a b a d s c e n e , ” h is frie n d said. " C a n 't h a v e th a t.” " I t 's t o o t e r r i b l e , ” h e s a id . " I r e m e m b e r . O h , G o d , I r e m e m b e r .” " W e g o tta fix that. T hat's th e w o rd . Fix a n d th e w o rld fixes y o u .” True, true, tru e. P aradissium A m m is a m . B u t w h o k n o w s w h a t th in g s in th e c h e m ic a l d e liriu m o f life m a y c o m e ? It is th e e n d , it is th e e n d . "I g o tta g o , ” h e said. It w as an in te n s e d e m a n d , a fu ll a n d c o m p e llin g th in g . H e s h o u ld n 't h a v e h a d th e b ee r. T he b e e r was all w ro n g . T h e b e e r w as yin a n d n o t e n o u g h ya n g . . . p a n g . . . it h a d in v a d e d h is tu rg id lo in s to . . . " G o tta u r in a te ," h e said. "M erry, sir. D rin k is th e p r o v o k e r o f tw o th in g s, sir. U rine a n d le c h e ry , sir. It b o th g iv e th th e d e sire a n d ta k e th aw ay th e a b ility .” T hat w as . . . th a t w as . . . th e p o rter. T h e m a d p o rter. M a c b e th a n d " T o m o rro w , a n d to m o rro w , a n d to m o rro w , C reeps in th is p e t t y p a c e fro m d a y to . . . ” "I g o tta g o , ” h e r e p e a te d . "T his fragile, c lu m sy , in ta n g ib le , a w k w a r d , p a in fu l, le w d , d is o r g a n iz e d b o d y h a s g e n e r a te d e x c e s s iv e flu id as a p a rt o f its p u r in e m e ta b o lis m a n d o u t o f 109
T H E W E A R I E S T RIVER
all th is I m u s t v o id a certain d isc re te a m o u n t o f urea. I d id n o t sa y uric a c id sin c e uric a c id is e x c lu s iv e ly th e e n d p r o d u c t o f th e p u r in e m e ta b o lis m o f b ird s a n d o f th e m a m m a ls; o n ly th e n o b le D a lm a tia n -th e d o g , th a t is-h a s uric a c id as th e e n d p r o d u c t o f its p u r in e m e ta b o lis m . That, o f c o u rse , is exactly, p re c ise ly th e w a y it s h o u ld b e . ” "In th e alley, b a b e . In th e a lle y a n d w e 're a w a y lik e th e b. a. b ird to th e p a d , th e living m a c h in e .” T h e y w e n t a n d h e d id a n d th e y did. In th e e n d b y d e v io u s r o u te s . . . b y h y p e r s p a c e tu b e ? B y w alking? B y te le p o rta tio n ? B y fin d in g th e y e llo w b rick road in to th e c e n te r o f th e s im p le in trica cies o f a Klein b o ttle or p e rh a p s o n ly a p ro sa ic te sse ra c t, th e y c a m e to th e p a la ce, th e p la c e , th e p it, th e p a d , w h e re th e y liv e d , th e n o n -P o lic y h o ld e rs, fle e in g fro m reality. A n d Gloria sa id " H e llo " a n d G len d a sa id " H i” a n d G eraldine sa id "Far o u t ” a n d G ervais sa id " Y o u fr e a k s " a n d h e w o n d e r e d . . . h e re is th e fa m ily a n d th e fa m ily is all g, c o m p le te ly g, th e y g lo ry in g a n d th e final g is . . . m u s t b e G od. " A n d h e re 's th e h e p a titis e x p r e s s ," s o m e b o d y n a m e d g sa id a n d th e re w as a w o n d e r in th e c o n stric tin g live ru b b e r th in g o n his arm a n d th e b ite th a t p ie r c e d th e b lu e ve in s s u r r o u n d e d w ith a w e a l th , a ta p e s t r y , a b l u e - a n d - b l a c k u n i v e r s e o f h e m a to m a ta . And . . . And. . . And . . . "For a t i m e ,” h e said, "I was p o s s e s s e d b y a c o m p le te ly irra tio n a l fe a r.” "It's all right; " Gloria said. That w a s t h e wa y it w as in t h e first c e n t u r y , in t h e f or ma ti ve c e n t u r y , w h e n h e — f abr ic at or of immor t al ity— f led like t h e rest t o an e n d l e s s fantasy of d r u g s . For t h e m , it w a s b o r e d o m . For hi m, t h e heavy w e i g h t of guilt. No w, t w o a n d a half c e n t u r i e s later . . . Ma lc ol m, w h o w as n o w nearly t h r e e h u n d r e d y e ar s ol d a n d 110
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l o o k e d — f or t h e e v e n i n g a t l e a s t — p e r h a p s f o r t y , s a t a t t h e c e n t e r t a b l e in t h e Me a t r a c k , wait ing for his f e m a l e c u s t o m e r . T he small vial c o n t a i n i n g t h e si ngle a m b e r c a p s u l e of d e a t h felt like a p o u n d w e i g h t in his p o c k e t . It w as o n e of his f ew r e m a i n i n g a m b e r s until h e c o u l d s e e N or d l i n g again. Nor dl¡ ng, h e t h o u g h t wearily. No r dl in g , d e a t h ' s d e p u t y , right h a n d of t h e Angel o f D e a t h ; No r dl ¡ ng, w h o b r e w e d t h e o n e s u r e exit in this life of pain a n d e n d l e s s de c ay. M a lc o lm really d i d n ' t n e e d Nor dl¡ ng, h e t ol d himself. After all, h e c o u l d m a k e t h e r a t h er s i mp l e p ol y nu c le ¡ c acid e n d o t o x i n hi mself, b u t t h e r e w as still t h e e m o t i o n a l r e l u c t a n c e to h ave a n y t h i n g e v e r to d o again with t h a t d e a d l y s c i e n c e of c r e at io n . H e n c e Nor dl ¡ ng, a n d b e f o r e him w h a t s e e m e d an e n d l e s s line of s u p p li e rs , all d e a d o r i m m o b i l i z e d in t h e Kraals n o w. Ma lc ol m ha d t o ld B ob by , his r u n n e r , t h a t h e did n o t like m a k i n g t h e c o n t a c t in s u c h a p ubli c place as t h e Me at r ac k , b u t t h e m a n h a d r e f u s e d t o s e e him e l s e w h e r e . He badly n e e d e d t h e m o n e y to pay t h e i nt e r e s t to t h e b a r r a c u d a s for t h e m o n e y h e h a d b o r r o w e d . F unny, h e t h o u g h t . It's th e y o u n g o n e s w h o c o m e to m e n o w . Well, n o t so o d d actually, w h e n yo u c o n s i d e r e d t h e m e a n i n g of life af ter fifty in t his d e c a y i ng city t h a t e xi ste d u n d e r t h e b e n e v o l e n t t y ra n n y of t h e C o m p a n y . He lifted t h e c of f ee c u p to his lips a n d s i p p e d caut iousl y. It w as m u c h t o o h ot , as t h o u g h t h e wa i t e r t h o u g h t t h e t e m p e r a t u r e mi g ht d i s gu i se t h e h ar sh t as t e of r o a s t e d grain. He sat t h e c u p pr eci sely in its c r a c k e d s a u c e r t o t h e left of his plate a n d s tir re d it patiently, t h i n k i n g of Eliot's Prufrock, "I have m e a s u r e d o u t my life with c of f ee s p o o n s . " He s i g h e d , r e m e m b e r i n g w h e n t h e r e was a t i m e for p oe t ry a n d e v e n love in t h e days b e f o r e t h e w o r l d ha d filled with t h e a g e d a n d t h e fierce y o u n g o n e s t r e a d i n g hotly o n t he ir he el s, b e f o r e t h e d r u g s c e n e , b e f o r e t h e p a s si o n of t h e g o r g o n s . T h e r e h a d b e e n fine d i n i n g pla ce s in t h e city— h e r e m e m b e r e d t h e m f r o m t w o c e n t u r i e s b e f o r e — w h e r e o n e mi g ht e nj oy t h e p l e a s u r a b l e g r a c e s of a c u l t u r e t h a t still hel d itself a f ew f o o t s t e p s a b o v e t h e survival level. N o w . . . ? 111
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T h e m u t t e r i n g r e t r e a ts O f r e s t l e s s n i g h t s in o n e - n i g h t c h e a p h o t e l s A n d s a w d u s t r e s t a u r a n t s w i th o y s t e r - s m e l l s . . .
O n l y t h e smells h e r e w e r e of b u r n e d f o o d a n d t h e s t e n c h of d e c a y i n g g a r b a g e drifting in f ro m t h e o p e n alley d o o r . He h a d b e c o m e o b s e s s e d with Pr uf rock lately. He w o n d e r e d if a n y o n e e ls e e v e n r e m e m b e r e d Eliot's ag ing d r a b. Prufrock, he t h o u g h t , s e e m e d t h e p e r f e c t a n t h e m for t h e city a n d t h e p e o p l e in it. He n e r v o u s l y s c a n n e d t h e faces of a n e w g r o u p t h a t e n t e r e d t h e c u r t a i n e d d o o r , s e a r c h i n g for s o m e sign of r e c o g ni ti o n o n t h e f aces o f t h e w o m e n . T h e y w e r e all high o n alkaloids, h e saw. T h e M e a t r a c k wa s o n e of t h e f e w r e m a i n i n g public r e s t a u r a n t s in t h e city a n d e xi st ed per il ousl y by v ir tu e of a platoo n of bullyboys w h o policed th e im m e d ia te area and w a r r e d with t h e i n d i g e n o u s g an g s . T h e ext r a e x p e n s e of p r o t e c tion f o u n d its ref lect ion in t h e i r prices. He was c o n t e m p l a t i n g t h e limp v e g e s t e a k o n his p late (fifteen dollars for e ig ht o u n c e s ) a n d idly p a w i n g t h r o u g h t h e soya gravy w h e n t h e w a i t e r b e h i n d hi m, o b v i ou s ly high o n s o m e p s y c h e d e l i c d r u g , s l i p p e d o n a p i e c e of d i s c a r d e d f o o d a n d d u m p e d a p i t c h e r o f p r e c i o u s w a t e r o n him. M a lc ol m j u m p e d t o his f eet, realizing t h a t in s e c o n d s h e w o u l d b e c o m p r o m i s e d . His m a k e - u p ran in an instant . T he s m o o t h th¡rtyish face t h a t h e h a d s o carefully built u p earli er t h a t e v e n i n g d is s ol v ed in r u n n i n g p r i ma ry c o l o rs a n d t h e p r o t e i n - b a s e d t is s u e firmer l a p s e d i n t o a s e m ¡ g e l a t ¡ n o u s l iqu id t h a t s l u m p e d d o w n his c h e e k s . In an i nst ant , a m i d t h e y o u n g a n d n o t - s o - y o u n g d i ne r s, h e d i ss ol ve d a n d b e c a m e w h a t h e w as, o n e of t h e o ld o n e s , t h e h a t e d , f e a r e d a n d loved ol d o n e s a n d . . . w o r s e . . . several y o u n g i s h p e o p l e at t h e n e a r t a b l e r e c o g n i z e d him. "L oo k , l o o k , " t h e girl at t h e n ex t t a b l e said. He r pupils w e r e wi del y d il ated, ma gnif yi ng h e r e yes. " M a l c o l m , " t h e girl n e x t t o h e r b r e a t h e d a n d t h e n s q u e a l e d a high e cst ati c s q u e a l . T he mid-thi rti es b l o n d m a n next t o h e r g la re d a n d half r os e , 112
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his b i c e p s in t h e clinging g a u z e - t h i n shirt bu l gi ng with t h e u n c o n s c i o u s n e e d t o attack. “ It's M a l c o l m , M a l c o l m , M a l c o l m , " o t h e r f e m a l e v o i c e s a ro und the room breathed and he knew that he had been f o u n d o ut . H e p u s h e d f r om t h e ch a ir quickly. He t h r e w a w a d of c re di ts o n t o t h e tab le , scarcel y n ot i c i n g t h e w i d e c o n t e m p t u o u s e ye s of his wait er, w h o ha d m o m e n t s b e f o r e b e e n relatively d e f e r e n tial. M a lc ol m l o o k e d wildly a b o u t t h e d u s t y d i n i n g r o o m , s e e i n g hate-filled ma le e ye s , lust-filled f e m a l e eyes, dull e ye s, a b n o r mally b r igh t e yes. O n l y o n e u n d e r s t a n d i n g g l a nc e m e t his a n d h e r e c o g n i z e d Felice, a d a n c e r a t his cl ub , h e r dirty y el l o w - wh i te hair f r am in g s a g g i ng jowls a n d a pain-filled e x p r e s s i o n . The d r u n k e n y o u n g m a n wit h h e r r e a c h e d o u t to t o u c h h e r livers p o t t e d h a n d a n d s h e t u r n e d away, w i t h d r a w i n g h e r s y m p a t h y f r om him in t h e i nstant. T h e y o u n g m a n g l a r ed at h im. M a lc ol m g u e s s e d f r o m his y o u t h t h a t h e w a s n o t a Pol i cy ho l de r, t h at h e h a d n o t y e t r e c e i v e d t h e H e ¡ n h o l t z t r e a t m e n t . Th is , of c o u r s e , m a d e him very v u l n e r a b l e a n d over ly c a u t i o u s in his r ea c ti o n s . M a lc o lm ha d little t o fear f r om him. T he wa i te r s n a p p e d , " T a k e y o u r m o n e y , d a m n it." M a lc ol m s t a r e d at his six-foot bu lk y b o d y , wi th t h e tight m u s cles a n d t h e first signs o f a b ul g i ng s t o m a c h . T h e y o u n g o n e s d i d n ' t k e e p t h e m s e l v e s in s h a p e a n y m o r e . Well, w h y s h o u l d t h e y w o r k at it? T h e r e w e r e so f e w o f t h e m a n d little c o m p e t i tion. Besi des w h i c h t h e s t a n d a r d s ha d c h a n g e d dr amatically in his t i m e s o t h a t t h e l a me a n d t h e halt a n d t h e d i sf igur ed b e c a m e i n v e s t e d w it h a special b e a u t y all t h e i r o w n . " K e e p it," h e said. " Yo u e a r n e d it." " Lo o k , m i s t e r , " t h e m a n said, " g e t o u t of h e r e fast. I'll s h o w y ou t h e b a c k d o o r . W e d o n ' t w a n t a ny m o r e t r o u b l e with t h e c o n s t a b l e s . W e g ot e n o u g h t r o u b l e n o w o n t h e s t r e e t s . " M a lc ol m p a u s e d to c o n s i d e r his offer. Yes, it w o u l d p e r h a p s b e b e t t e r to leave by th e rear e n t r a n c e n o w th a t he was unmasked. " S h o w m e t h e w a y , " h e said tiredly, t h r o w i n g d o w n his n a p ki n 113
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a n d p laci ng his h a n d u n c o n s c i o u s l y o n t h e y o u n g e r m a n ' s ar m. " D o n ' t t o u c h m e , " t h e y o u n g m a n said with di s tas t e. " I ' m trying t o s ave y o u r life. So d o n ' t t o u c h m e . " M a lc ol m f o l l o we d him t o t h e rear of t h e small caf é wh i le t h e girls o h e d a n d a h e d at his s h a m b l i n g figur e a n d t h e m e n h eld t h e m s e l v e s in tight r es e rv e . Had h e b e e n a w o m a n , h e t h o u g h t , t h e sit uat ion w o u l d h av e b e e n c o m p l e t e l y r e ve r se d . He felt t h e physical t e x t u r e of t h e y o u n g m e n ' s h a t e a n d h e t h o u g h t , N e v e r m in d , in a n o th e r thirty or fifty years y o u will jo in m e a n d th e y o u n g m e n w h o are le ft w ill h a te y o u a n d lo a th e y o u a n d I will b e h e re in th e fa d in g vigor o f m y fo u rth c e n tu r y to m o c k y o u a n d g lo a t a t h o w th e w o rld has tu r n e d a n d th e p r in c e h as b e c o m e th e frog. O n c e t h r o u g h t h e k i tc he n a n d into t h e c l oyi ng d a r k n e s s of t h e alley, h e p a u s e d a n d r e s t e d a gai ns t t h e d e c a y i n g brick of t h e b ui ld in g. T he wa i te r t u r n e d in t h e y el low g lo w o f t h e d o o r w ay a n d s n a p p e d , " O l d m a n , you m o v e o n . If you w a n t to ge t y o u r s e l f killed, d o m e t h e favor of d o i n g it a f e w b loc ks f ro m h e r e . You o w e m e t h a t m u c h . " " Y e s , " M al co l m said tiredly, " ye s, I o w e y o u t h a t m u c h . " He s t a r te d slowly d o w n t h e alley. At t h e o p p o s i t e e n d of t h e alley h e h e a r d e x ci t e d voices a n d a s u d d e n w h o o p i n g s o u n d . Like h o u n d s a fte r th e a g in g sta llio n , he t h o u g h t . O r wol ves. T h e y th o u g h t th e y h a d b e e n w o lv e s-G lo ria , G ervais, all th e rest. Ju st b e c a u s e th e y w e re m o rta l a n d d id n o t fear d e a th . In ste a d t h e y e m b a r k e d o n a k in d o f sp iritu a l im m o rta lity , ta u n t in g p h y sic a l d e a th . "H a ve y o u e v e r fe lt th a t w ay?" M a lco lm a s k e d . "T h a t s e n s e o f p a n ic , o f c o m p le te d is o r ie n ta tio n ? " " W e all g e t i t," G len d a sa id , e m b ra c in g h im . "I w o n d e r th a t y o u d o n 't g e t it m o r e o f t e n ." (T h e y d id n 't k n o w a b o u t h im , th a t h e d id n o t sh a re th e ir c h e r is h e d m o rta lity.) "I d o n 't lik e i t ," h e said. " N o n e o f us d o , ” G ervais sa id . H e was th e b ig o n e , th e stro n g o n e o f th e fam ily, a n d e v e n w h e n h e w a s n 't trying to 114
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s h o w o ff, his m o s t casu a l m o v e b r o u g h t g re a t b ic e p s b u lg in g a g a in st his k n it shirt. H e was re d d ish b lo n d a n d in th e o p e n th ro a t o f his sh irt a crin kly m a ss o f r e d -b lo n d hair w r ith e d o n his c h e s t lik e th e s n a k e s o f M e d u s a 's h e a d . His arm s w ere p e p p e r e d w ith fre c k le s a n d fre c k le s s p o t t e d th e b a c k s o f his fin g ers. H e h a d a tu r n e d -u p n o s e a n d n o strils w id e a n d flared a n d h e lo o k e d in to d ista n c e s n o t ea sily p e r c e iv e d b y th e o th ers. " W e a re ," G ervais said, "an e n c la v e o f w o lv e s. In th e m id s t o f th e s h e e p flo c k in g to th e C o m p a n y a n d its im m o rta l p a b lu m , w e are w o lv e s ." "I h a v e a c o n fe s s io n , " M a lco lm said. " I'v e run from it to o lo n g a n d th e r e 's n o re s p ite in th e fam ily. T h e w e ig h t o f g u ilt is to o m u c h .” " Y o u 'r e s p a c e d o u t , ” G ervais said. " W h y s h o u ld y o u h a ve m o r e g u ilt th a n I h a v e g u ilt or s h e has g u ilt?" " B e c a u s e , " M a lco lm sa id , "I a m a stra n g er a n d afraid in a w o rld I s u r e ly m a d e ." "I lik e y o u ," Gloria said. " Y o u 're a cla ssicist a n d I've alw ays lik e d cla ssicists. H o w o ld are y o u 1" " M u c h o ld e r th a n y o u ," M a lco lm said. " H o w o ld ? " "A c e n tu ry , a t le a s t." T h e y d re w b a c k fro m h im th e n , th e w h o le fam ily, a n d Gervais said, " Y o u d id n 't te ll u s ." "I c o u ld n 't ," h e sa id p la in tiv e ly . " Y o u to o k a p o lic y ? " Gloria a c c u s e d . “L o n g a g o ," h e said. "R a th er, I w ro te th e p o lic y ." G len d a sa id , "T h a t's im p o s s ib le . H e in h o ltz w ro te th e p o lic y a n d h e g a v e h is fo rm u la to th e C o m p a n y a n d th e C o m p a n y has c o m e to o w n th e w o rld , b u t H e in h o ltz is d e a d or w o rse . . . in th e K raals." " If it w e re o n ly tr u e ,” M a lco lm said. " Y o u c a n 't b e th a t o l d ," G era ld in e said. "I a m , I a m ," h e said. " Y o u s ic k e n m e , " G ervais said. " W e 'll all d ie s o o n ." "B u t y o u w o n 't, " G le n d a said. " I'v e trie d t o , " h e said. " I'v e g o n e y o u r d ru g trip a n d I've 115
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sw a llo w e d y o u r o w n p riv a te b ra n d o f im m o rta lity a n d I've trie d . " " B u t y o u 'll still liv e ," G ervais a c c u se d . "F orgive m e , fo rg ive m e , fo rg ive m e , " M alcolm p le a d e d . "I s ic k e n u n to d e a th a t th e s ig h t o f y o u ," G ervais said, p o s tu r ing. M a lco lm fe lt a d u ll s e n s e o f fu tility. H e was g e ttin g h ig h again as t h e y all w ere. It was n o u se , n o p o s s ib le w a y o f a ssu a g in g his g u ilt fo r w h a t h e h a d b r o u g h t o n th e w orld. O u ts id e , th e first sig n s o f d e c a y w ere c r e e p in g o v e r th e city. T h e C o m p a n y e x is te d , th e sin g le m o s t p o t e n t fin a n cia l force o n th e g lo b e , a n d th e r e was n o h o p e , n o t s o lo n g as h u m a n s h e ld to life a n d o th e r h u m a n s d is a v o w e d life. It w as all a d e a d e n d , th e p e o p le o u ts id e e m b ra c in g th e tr e a tm e n t a n d th e s e p o o r crea tu res fle e in g in to a d rea m e x is te n c e in w h ic h th e y fa n c ie d th e m s e lv e s w o lv e s a m o n g s h e e p . E nclave o f w o lv e s, h e th o u g h t b itterly. E veryo n e k n o w s th a t o n th e N o rth A m e ric a n c o n tin e n t w o lv e s are e x tin c t. A s a d g o o d - b y t o t h e family of g 's , h e t h o u g h t . It was a lost p e r i o d of his i mmo rt al life. But n o w t h e r e w e r e o t h e r w o lv e s . . . M a lc o lm ran d o w n t h e alley b e h i n d t h e M e a t r a c k as fast as his t ir ed legs w o u l d carry him. If o nl y h e c o u l d c o m e o n a patrol of t h e C o m p a n y c o n s t a b l e s , h e t h o u g h t . “ T h e r e h e is," a bull voi ce yelled. " G e t him a n d let's d o h i m , " a n o t h e r y ell ed, his voi ce c h e m i cally b l u r r e d . He t r ied t o run faster. T h e alley's m o u t h was a t h o u s a n d miles a wa y a n d t h e s e ar i n g b r e a t h was a l re a dy t e a r i n g at his t h r o at . He h a d b e e n in s u c h si tu a ti on s b e f o r e a n d h a d m a n a g e d t o e s c a p e . T ha nk G o d , h e w as n o t t h a t a t t e n u a t e d . N o t like t h e r ank o n r an k of o l d s t e r s in t h e Kraals o n t h e e d g e of t h e city. T he e n d l e s s r ows of w e a k a n d p u ls i n g o l d s t e r s w h o c o u l d n o t die, w h o c o u l d n o t b e killed. All b e c a u s e of h i m, t h at b e i n g w h o was M al co l m in an a vat ar l o n g a go , b e f o r e t h e wo r ld h a d s u n k into t h e c o r r u p t i o n o f t h e p r e s e n t , t h e d e c a y of n o w . He b r o k e f r o m t h e alleyway a n d l o o k e d to t h e right a n d 116
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left. T h e y w o u l d s o o n b e u p o n h i m a n d h e h a d n o m o r e s t r e n g t h . ( Wha t d e m a n d s c an y o u m a k e o n a b o d y n e ar ly t h r e e c e n t u r i e s old? Tr ue , h e ha d p r e s e r v e d it in a f ash ion t h a t t h e o t h e r o l d st e r s w i t h o u t his s pe ci al iz ed k n o w l e d g e ha d n o t b e e n a bl e, b u t it r e m a i n e d a t h r e e - c e n t u r y - o l d b o d y a n d t h e e n d w as in sight . . . d i st an t a n d p r o l o n g e d b u t definitely in sight.) At t h e alley's e n t r a n c e , his f oo t c a u g h t in a c h u c k h o l e in t h e m a c a d a m a n d h e fell s pr awl i ng. His o u t t h r u s t h a n d s k i d d e d ac ro s s t h e gritty p a v e m e n t , leaving layers of skin b e h i n d . He felt t h e s u d d e n tingling as t h e friction w o u n d g a t h e r e d quickly a n d b e g a n t o heal. Th en t h e five m e n t u m b l e d f r om t h e alley's m o u t h a n d w e r e u p o n hi m. He raised his a r m t o w a r d off t h e b lo ws. They w o u l d ha ve knives. Everyone h a d knives, k n o w ing t h a t t h e y w o u l d w o u n d a n d r e n d a n d c a u s e pain b u t w o u l d n o t kill. T h e y o u n g o n e s did h a v e knives a n d t h e y u s e d t h e m . His o u t s t r e t c h e d h a n d t o o k o n e t h a t p i e r c e d his pal m. A n o t h e r t h r u s t at his c h e s t a n d b u r i e d itself an i nch d e e p . A t hi r d in a grimy h a n d b u r i e d itself in his belly as h e s c r e a m e d with p a i n . T h e a t t a c k h a d b e e n s i l e n t t o t h i s p o i n t . His s c r e a m alarmed them. “ He'll b r i ng t h e c o n s t a b l e s , " o n e yell ed. A s e c o n d a i m e d a kick at his ribs a n d h e fell b a c k g as pi ng . He h e a r d a di st ant g r i n d i n g a n d s u d d e n l y t h e attack wa s over . T h e t w e l v e - w h e e l e d lorry c a m e f r o m a s i d e s t re et , its har d plastic w h e e l s g r i n d i n g at t h e s c a t t e r e d litter of t h e st re et . Its m u l ti pl e r e d lights p l u c k e d at t h e d e c a y i n g b ui ld i n g s o n e i t h e r si de. T h ey s aw h im e v e n b e f o r e h e saw t h e m a n d p ul le d t o w a r d him. T h a n k C o d , h e t h o u g h t , c o n s ta b le s . “ D a m n e d old f o o l , " a v oi c e said. “ Kn ow b e t t e r t h a n t o c o m e downtown." A bu lk y b o d y l e a p e d f r o m t h e lorry, sc at te r in g g a r b a g e b e f o r e a b o o t e d f oot , a n d g r a b b e d him. “ Inside, g r a n ' p a , " t h e man s n o r t e d . “ I ns i de o r we'll let t h e m s p r e a d y o u r i mmor ta l gut s over the pavem ent." H e n e e d e d n o s e c o n d u rgi ng. He b u s t l e d i nto t h e lorry a n d 117
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t h e a r m o r e d d o o r c l o s e d b e h i n d him. S e c o n d s later, t h e lorry t u r r e t g r o u n d o u t t w e n t y d e g r e e s t o face t h e g a n g of y o u n g sters. " B a c k , " a n a mpl if ie d vo i ce said. " T h e C o m p a n y is m a r sh a li n g the block." " Gi ve us t h e r a u n c h y b a s t a r d , " a voi ce yelled f r o m t h e g r o u p . " B a c k , " t h e lorry's a mpl if ie d v o ic e s h o u t e d agai n. A t hick t u b u l a r s t r u c t u r e e m e r g e d f r o m t h e t u r r e t a n d s e c o n d s later t h e c he mi ca l m a t c h of t h e f l a me t h r o w e r ignited. T he y o u n g m e n s a w t h e first g l o w a n d b r o k e in frantic retreat . " T h a n k G o d , " a voi ce f r o m wit hin t h e lorry said. "I d o n ' t th in k I c an t o r c h a n o t h e r o n e this e v e n i n g . " " M ar y -w a¡ s t, " a n o t h e r vo ic e s n o r t e d in c o n t e m p t . T he s e r g e a n t in c h a r g e of t h e lorry t u r n e d t o Ma lc ol m. He w o r e a hea vy g r e n a d e l a u n c h e r as a s ide ar m. " H o w are y ou , o ld m a n ? " h e d e m a n d e d . M a lc ol m i n s p e c t e d his b o d y . The w o u n d o n his h a n d wa s n o w o n l y a faint pink scar. T he o n e in his belly still a c h e d b u t his e x p l o r i n g fingers t ol d him t h a t it h a d c l o s e d cleanly. Th e pain was a n o t h e r m a t t e r f r o m this a n d t h e s h a t t e r e d ribs. It w o u l d a b a t e e ve nt ual ly, h e k n e w , b u t it w o u l d p r o b a b l y n e v e r c o m p l e t e l y d i s a p p e a r . For e ve r y w o u n d t h e fast -heal i ng scar t i ss u e d e v e l o p e d tiny p oi n t s of p r e s s u r e o n n e r v e e n d i n g s . He c o u l d n o t b e w o u n d e d o r killed b u t e a c h b r e a c h of t h e q ui c k - h e a l i n g walls of his b o d y left its legacy of u n e n d i n g dull pain. The lorry b e g a n t o m o v e , g ai ni ng s p e e d t o thirty miles an h o u r as t h e y t h r e a d e d t h e i r way d o w n t h e b o u l e v a r d past t h e s h a t t e r e d walls of a b a n d o n e d hi gh- ri ses a n d piles of d e br i s s t a c k e d b e s i d e t h e c u r b . O f all t h e s t r e e t s in t h e city, t h e b o u l e v a r d was still relatively clear. T h e c o n s t a b l e s e r g e a n t t o o k his n a m e a n d a s k e d his resi d e n c e . Ma lc ol m a t t e m p t e d t o t h a n k him. "I g e t p a i d , " t h e m a n said in c o m p l e t e di s i nt er es t . " B es id e s, t h e y c o u l d n ' t have killed y o u . " "It w o u l d n ' t have b e e n w o r t h living a f t e r wa r d if y ou h a d n ' t a rrived in t i m e , " M a lc ol m said. 118
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" B ut y ou w o u l d h a v e , " t h e m a n said in c o m p l e t e d e t a c h m e n t . T h e n , "St ay h o m e at ni ght. D o n ' t g o o u t like t hat. Next t i me , w e ma y n o t b e a bl e t o r e s c u e y o u . " "All right, all r ig h t, " h e said. " T h e y o u n g o n e s h a v e n ' t got me yet." " H o w old a re y o u ? " t h e s e r g e a n t a s k e d . " I ' m n o t r e a d y for t h e Kraals y e t , " h e s n a p p e d , k n o w i n g full well t h a t m a n y m e n a h u n d r e d y ea rs his j u n i o r w e r e a l r e ady a pa rt of t h a t living d e a t h . "Y ou will b e , " t h e s e r g e a n t said. " S o will y o u , ” h e s n a p p e d irritably. "I'll t a k e my c h a n c e , " t h e s e r g e a n t said. " W h a t d o y o u d o ? " "D o?" " F o r a living." "I ' m an e n t e r t a i n e r , " h e said. "A d a n c e r . " " O h , " t h e s e r g e a n t said, n o t b o t h e r i n g t o h i d e t h e d is tas te in his voice. " O n e o f t h o s e . " " O n e of t h o s e , " Ma lc ol m said. T he y d r o v e him d o w n t h e d a r k a n d d a n g e r o u s s t r e et s to t h e c l u b in t h e Village. He c h e c k e d t h e t i m e a n d t h o u g h t t hat if h e m a d e it t h r o u g h t h e s h o w , t h e y m i g h t b e a b l e t o get b a c k t o t h e i r a p a r t m e n t b e f o r e t h e b a r r a c u d a s c a u g h t him. He h a d b o r r o w e d t h e m o n e y at Britt's i n s is t e nc e. S he loved t h e p r e c i o u s luxuries of this s ad w o r l d a n d w h o was h e to d e n y h er ? N o w t h e b a r r a c u d a s w e r e p r e s s i n g him. If h e d i d n ' t pay u p s o o n , t h e y w o u l d certainly t a k e act ion a gains t him. W h a t acti on m a d e him s h u d d e r . He c u r s e d hims elf silently for his w e a k n e s s , his p a t h e t i c n e e d t o p l e a s e Britt, w h o , after all, w o u l d b e wi th him r e g a r d l e s s of t h e favors h e lavished on her. At t h e a l l e y w a y e n t r a n c e t o t h e c l u b , t h e s e r g e a n t s a i d, " Y o u ' r e clear. You c an m a k e it." " T h a n k y o u , " h e said tiredly. " W h a t d o y ou d o t h e r e ? " t h e s e r g e a n t a s k e d idly. "As I t o l d y o u , I d a n c e , " h e said. "I just b e t y o u ' r e light as a leaf o n y o u r f e e t , " t h e m a n said. "It isn't t h a t kind of d a n c e , " he said. 119
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"I d i d n ' t t h i n k it w a s , " t h e m a n said c o n t e m p t u o u s l y . Ma lc ol m s w u n g heavily f r o m t h e lorry, d r o p p i n g t h e last f oo t f r om t h e s t e p s in false b r av a do . T he s h o c k of alighting t wi st ed his a n k l e slightly, b u t h e w o u l d b e d a m n e d if h e w o u l d let t h e s e r g e a n t s e e it. " S e e y o u s o m e t i m e , " h e said mockingl y. " N o t b l o o d y likely," t h e m a n ' s voice c a m e t o him. The lorry s t a r te d , s p u n its w h e e l s a n d l u m b e r e d d o w n t h e s t r e e t , leaving him at t h e h e a d of t h e alley. He t u r n e d a n d w a l k e d into its shadows. H e e n t e r e d t h e s ta g e d o o r a n d m o v e d t h r o u g h t h e d im lights t o his d r e s s i n g r o o m , p a u s i n g t o e ye t h e stage. He w a s s u r p r i s e d t o s e e t h a t Felice w as o n a n d h e w o n d e r e d h o w s h e h a d m a d e it b a c k f r o m t h e M e a t r a c k in t i m e f or t h e p e r f o r m a n c e . He w a t c h e d h e r c l um sy m o v e m e n t s t h a t c o n t r a s t e d s o g r o t e s q u e l y wi th h e r p a r t n e r ' s , a lean y o u n g m a n with jet-black hair a n d stringy y o u n g m u sc l es . He was clad onl y in a r a g g e d loincl ot h a n d s h e w o r e a mu s t y lion's m a n e . The act w a s q u it e trite, b u t t h e s a d o m a s o c h i s t i c o v e r t o n e s a p p e a l e d t o t h e y o u n g ma le s in t h e a u d i e n c e . H e l o o k e d o u t o v e r t h e c l ub floor. The y o u n g e r m e n c l u s t e r e d in t h e rear, m o s t of t h e m u n a c c o m p a n i e d . He w a t c h e d several s p r a w l e d o u t in t h e d i m n e s s , t h e y o u n g t h i gh s j er ki ng n er vo u sl y t o t h e mus ic . Several of t h e m h a d t he ir h a n d s t h r u s t d e e p in t h e i r p o c k e t s a n d h e c o u l d s e e t h e c lo th t h at c o v e r e d t he ir a b d o m e n s q u i r m with t h e v i o l e n c e o f t h e i r parallel play. The a p h r o d i s i a c smell o f amyl nitrite was o p p r e s s i v e . " T h e d e a d a r e d a n c i n g with t h e d e a d , " h e t h o u g h t wearily a n d tr ied t o r e m e m b e r w h e r e t ha t h a d c o m e f ro m. Wil de? Yes, Wil de , he t h o u g h t . He m a d e his way t h r o u g h t h e d u s t y s c e n e r y , past tabl es of e m p t y b o t tl e s t h at e x u d e d a r an k o d o r a n d t o t h e r ear c u r t a i n e d a r e a t h a t w a s t h e i r d r e s s i n g r o o m . Britt w a s a l r e a d y t h e r e , c h a n g ¡ n g t o h e r c o s t u m e . It wa s a wi s p y t h ¡ n g o f g r e e n - a n d - b l u e g a u z e with small starfish c l u s t e r e d a b o u t t h e b r e as ts a n d p u b i c r e gi on . U n d e r t h e b l u e a n d g r e e n lights of t h e floor, t h e d r i n k 120
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e rs of t h e c l ub w o u l d ge t t h e illusion of g a r m e n t s floating o n v ag r an t o c e a n c u r r e n t s . Her l ong b l o n d hair s h e h a d carefully m a t t e d with s pr ay so t h a t it dri fted like a d a m p hal o a b o u t h e r h e a d . Sh e l o o k e d u p as h e e n t e r e d a n d h e r thick s e n s u o u s lips p a r t e d moistly. H er e y e s w e r e e xci ted, t h o s e m a r v e l o u s b l u e e ye s t h a t s e e m e d t o have a s e p a r a t e e x i s t e n c e f ro m h e r s u p e r b flawless skin a n d s t r a w - b l o n d hair. " W h a t h a p p e n e d ? " sh e asked. He t ol d h e r , w a t c h i n g h e r e ye s g r o w w i d e with e x c i t e m e n t as h e r small k it te n' s t o n g u e e x t e n d e d a n d licked h e r lips with a s e n s u o u s n e s s t ha t still e x c it ed him. D u r i n g t h e i r c l ub act, s h e q u i t e f r e q u e n t l y u s e d t ha t g e s t u r e , b u t t h e n it w a s for effect . . . s t u d i e d , carefully s t r u c t u r e d . N o w, it w a s u n c o n s c io us as s h e s a v o r e d vicariously t h e t er r ib le d a n g e r of b e i n g m a i m e d a n d living o n , h e l p l e s s a n d s h a t t e r e d in bod y . He b e g a n t o c h a n g e t o his c o s t u m e . It w a s e q u a ll y brief, c o n s i s t i n g o f a loi nclot h a n d a pair of s a n da l s o v e r w h i c h plastic s cales a n d l o ng t a lon s h a d b e e n g l u e d t o give t h e a p p e a r a n c e of a m o n s t e r ' s f eet. He d i v e s t e d hi msel f of his c l ot hi ng a n d d o n n e d t h e loi ncl ot h, t h e s a n da l s a n d finally t h e chilling seac r e a t u r e m a s k t ha t h e w o r e in t h e act. Britt c a m e o v e r a n d h e l p e d him pos it i o n t h e d or sa l fin t ha t p r o t r u d e d fr om b e t w e e n his s h o u l d e r b l a d es a n d ran d o w n to t h e b a s e of his sp in e. He s t o o d in f ro n t of t h e mirror. O f c o u r s e , u n d e r t h e lights t h e ef fect w as m o r e exotic. H e s e c u r e d t h e n e t a n d t r i d e n t f r o m b e s i d e t h e d r e ss i n g t abl e a n d t u r n e d as o n e of t h e lighting m e n s tu c k his h e a d t h r o u g h t h e c ur ta i n t o yell, " G e t a m o v e o n . Y o u ' re u p in five m i n u t e s . " Britt c a m e o v e r t o him a n d t o u c h e d his belly w h e r e t h e scars w e r e still an a n g r y red. Sh e l e a n e d f o r w ar d a n d kissed e a c h mar k, h e r e ye s s u d d e n l y i n t e n s e . He w o n d e r e d if s h e ha d b e e n t aki ng a ny t h in g . It wa s ver y har d t o tell a n d s h e h a d p r o m i s e d him t h a t s h e w o u l d n ' t . W h e n t h e i r m u s i c s t a r t e d , s h e left t h e d r e s s i n g a r e a whil e 121
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h e m a d e t h e final a d j u s t m e n t s t o t h e mask. T h e n h e w a lk e d t h r o u g h t h e c l u t t e r e d p a s s a g e w a y t o t h e cu r t ai ns t h a t s e p a r a t e d t h e st ag e f r om t h e back. He p e e r e d t h r o u g h t h e slit in a side h a n g i n g a n d n o t e d t h a t t h e c r o w d h ad i n c r e a s e d in t h e last h o u r . W h e r e a s t h e f r o nt r ow s ha d b e e n largely w o m e n , t h e s e xe s w e r e n o w equ al ly m ix ed, a l t h o u g h t h e r e w as s o m e t e n d e n c y for t h e o l d e r m e n to sit to t h e right of t h e c l ub with t h e i r d a t e s wh il e t h e o l d e r w o m e n with t h e i r y o u n g m e n w e r e t o t h e left. He s u p p o s e d t h e maì tre d' h a d a r r a n g e d this to avoi d t h e friction t hat ha d m a r r e d t h e p e r f o r m a n c e s in t h e past. T he m us ic s t a r t e d t h e n , a n e e r i e a tona l t h e m e o f flute, w o o d w i n d s a n d a t h e r e m ¡ n . It h a d b e e n m e c ha ni cal l y s y n t h e s i z e d a y ear b e f o r e for t h e i r act a n d t h e t a p e w a s b e g i n n i n g t o s h o w signs of w e ar . It r e m a i n e d , n e v e r t h e l e s s , a very effective b a c k g r o u n d . He l o o k e d o u t t o w a t c h Britt's first s i n u o u s , gliding s t e p s a c r o ss t h e small sta ge , h e r hair drifting in t h e c ol d blueg r e e n light as t h o u g h s h e w e r e u n d e r w a t e r . S h e was a sea th in g, s i n u o u s a n d exotic, h e r b r e as ts rising a n d falling with t h e s lo w e x e r t i o n of h e r b o d y . The d a n c e w a s d e l i b e ra t e l y s e n s u o u s , s h o w i n g t h e fine m u s c u l a r d e v e l o p m e n t o f h e r b o d y . Her n e a r n u di ty was m o r e s u g g e st i v e t h a n a n y m o r e b o l d s h o w o f flesh. H e w a i t e d until t h e flute gave a shrill trill a n d e n t e r e d fr om st ag e right. He w as a s e a c r e a t u r e hi msel f n o w , a t h i n g of g r o t e s q u e lust, twisti ng t h r o u g h t h e st ag e f r o n d s , his s t a n c e a clear m e n a c e t o t h e m o r e del ic at e figure of Britt. He m a d e s w i m m i n g m o t i o n s t o w a r d h er , b r a n d i s h i n g his t r id e n t , as s h e fell b a c k in m o c k t er r or . He w as c o n s c i o u s of t h e c l u m s i n e s s of his m o v e m e n t s , t h e lack o f g r ac e in his ag ing b o d y . As t h e a u d i e n c e l e a n e d f o r w ar d e x p e c ta n tl y , h e d e l i b e r a te l y e x a g g e r a t e d t h e c l um s i n e s s . He t h r e w t h e n e t n ow , t a ng l in g h e r in its coils a n d s h e w r i t h e d s e n s u o u s l y . In t h e n ex t i ns ta nt he h a d ca rr i e d h e r b a c k a ga in st a p a p i e r - m â c h é r ock a n d ha d i m p r i s o n e d h e r in t h e coils of t h e net. N o w t h e eroti c play b e g a n f or w h i c h t h e a u d i e n c e ha d w a it e d. 122
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Slowly with t h e e n d of t h e t r i d e n t h e d i v e s t e d h e r of h e r g a u z e c o s t u m e , s t r i pp i ng it f ro m h e r in s h r e d s a n d s c a t t er i ng t h e c o n c eal ing starfish t o t h e f l oo r of t h e st a ge . In m i n u t e s s h e was p i n i o n e d a ga inst t h e r o ck, c o m p l e t e l y n u d e , h e r b o d y cri ng in g in m o c k h o r r o r . He c o n t i n u e d his s lo w c l ums y d a n c e a b o u t h er , t h r u s t i n g o u t wi th his t r i d e n t at intervals t o d r a w a tiny p a tc h of b l o o d . Wi th e a c h rivulet of b l o o d , h e h e a r d a w h i s p e r ing g a s p f r o m t h e a u d i e n c e . T he w o m e n w e r e w a t c h i n g him with b ri gh t e yes, t h e m e n l e an i n g f or wa r d. H e c a u g h t sight of a w h i t e y o u n g mal e face with g l a z ed e y e s a n d a tiny t o n g u e w e t t i n g w h i t e lips as h e s t e p p e d b a c k t o e ye Britt's b l o o d - d o t t e d f igure. A h , h e t h o u g h t , M e d u sa a n d th e o th e r G o rg o n s-I am o n e w ith y o u all. He w as p r e p a r i n g for t h e final t h r u s t of t h e t r i d e n t . To this p o i n t t h e b l o o d ha d b e e n ver y real, b u t s e c r e t e d in a t a p e d p o c k e t u n d e r o n e a r m Britt c ar r ie d a vial of t hi ck r e d d y e for this final m o v e m e n t . As h e d r e w b a c k f or t h e m o c k t h r u s t t h a t w o u l d p e n e t r a t e t h e plastic vial, t h e feveri sh y o u n g man j u m p e d t o his f e e t a n d y el l e d, " M a k e it real; m a k e it r ea l! " Before Ma lc ol m c o u l d r e c o ve r , t h e y o u n g m a n h a d l e a p e d to t h e low s t a g e a n d was tryi ng t o w r e s t t h e t r i d e n t f ro m him. C l u b s ecur it y g u a r d s ran f ro m e i t h e r si d e for t h e s t ag e b u t t h e w h o l e a u d i e n c e s e e m e d t o di ss ol ve s u d d e n l y into g r o u p s of st ru gg li ng p e o p l e . M a lc ol m fell b ac k f r o m t h e y o u n g m a n a n d a i m e d a heavy kick at him. T h e m a n s h r u g g e d it off. He w as a Pol icyhol der , Ma lc ol m r eal ized, a n d a l m o s t i n v u ln e ra b le . Any a ssa ul t— n o m a t t e r h o w l ethal— w o u l d i n c a p ac i ta t e him o n l y for m i n u t e s d u r i n g t h e n e r v o u s s p a s m of r e g e n e r a t i o n . T h e s ecur ity m e n s aw this a n d fell o n him wit h t h e e l e c t r o s t i n g e r s t h a t t h e y ca rr ie d in t h e i r belts. H e w r i t h e d u n d e r t h e s p a s m s f r o m t h e sti ngers a n d fell t o t h e s t a g e as M a lc o lm ran t o Britt a n d f r e e d h e r f r o m t h e cl inging n e t. H e r e ye s w e r e wild a n d e xc ite d at t h e t u r mo il o v e r t h e footl ight s. "Let's get o u t of h e r e b e f o r e t h e c o n s ta b le s c o m e , " he s h o u t e d a n d f o r c e d h e r b a c k s t a g e . T h e n o i s e of t h e conflict 123
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f a d e d b e h i n d t h e hea vy cur tains. He f o r c e d h e r into a r o b e a n d f o u n d a shirt a n d p a n t a l o o n s f or himself. O n c e o u t into t h e s t r e e t , h e d r a g g e d h e r into a s t u m b l i n g r un. The y r e a c h e d t h e h e a d o f t h e al ley as t h e l o r r i e s l o a d e d w i t h c o n s t a b l e s a p p r o a c h e d d o w n t h e main st re et . T he s e v e n b loc ks t o t h e i r tiny a p a r t m e n t w as a t i me of c o n t in u in g p a ni c for Ma lc ol m. Had t h e y c o m e u p o n a s t r e e t ga ng , h e w o u l d n o t have k n o w n w h a t t o d o. S h e wa s s o v u l n e r a b l e , h e t h o u g h t , in h e r y o u n g mortality a n d so e n t h r a l l e d wi t h t h e t h o u g h t of v i ol en ce . At t h e d o o r , h e w h i st l e d t h e c o m b i n a t i o n t h a t act ivat ed t h e lock a n d p r o p e l l e d h e r ins wa rd . S h e s p r a w l e d o n t h e b e d wh il e h e f o u n d q u i c k - h e a l i n g u n g u e n t a n d t o u c h e d t h e w o u n d s his t r i d e n t h a d left. T he y h e a l e d qui ckly as h e w a t c h e d . S he s i g h e d a n d said, “ Take off y o u r c l o t h e s . " He e y e d h e r t i r e d flesh a n d r e m o v e d his shirt a n d h e r e ye s b r i g h t e n e d . He f i ni s he d u n d r e s s i n g a n d s t o o d n u d e b e f o r e h er , his belly d r o o p i n g with t h e c o r d u r o y e d ri dg es of e x p a n s i o n marks w h e r e h e h a d g a i n e d a n d lost w e i g h t again a n d again. His l egs w e r e i n t r i c a t e l a c e r i e s o f b l u e a n d r e d c a p i l l a r i e s s l a s h e d by scars. T he flesh of t h e calves s a g g e d wh il e t h e hea vy m u s c l e s of t h e t h i g h s b u l g e d t h r o u g h t h e t hin skin in stringy masculinity. His c h e s t r e m a i n e d r e m a r k a b l y firm a l t h o u g h t h e n i p p l e s h a d e x p a n d e d a n d t h e fatty d e p o s i t s a b o u t t h e p ec to r al s w e r e saggi ng. T h e s car t i s s u e o n his belly w as still an angr y r ed mass. S he g r o a n e d w h e n s h e s aw his b o d y a n d t h r e w t h e r o b e f ro m herself, p o si t i o n i n g h e rs e lf o n t h e b e d , a r m s a n d legs a k i m b o . He t h o u g h t , O h , p le a s e , d o I h a v e to g o th ro u g h this in sa n e charade? On ly , this w as w h a t s h e w a n t e d , a n d h e w as m u c h t o o old a n d t o o ti r ed a n d t o o c o r r u p t t o a r g u e a ga ins t it. In t h e c u p b o a r d h e f o u n d t h e r o p e s a n d tied h e r a r m s t o e a c h e n d o f t h e h e a d b o a r d , f ee t s p r e a d - e a g l e d e a c h t o t h e f o o t of t h e b e d . " M a k e love t o m e , Mai, Mai, p l e as e, b a b y , " s h e b r e a t h e d .
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He f o u n d t h e belt, old a n d s u p p l e black l e at h e r , m a s s a g e d t o t h e delicacy of h u m a n skin by a h u n d r e d oily h a n d s , a n d d o u b l e d it in his fist as s h e s q u i r m e d b e l o w him. He raised his a r m a n d t h e black t h i n g s t ru c k o u t like a s n a k e . T h e soft s m a c k of l e a t h e r a ga ins t skin was a l m o s t a ca re ss . Sh e s q u i r m e d in e cs ta sy as h e b r o u g h t it d o w n again a n d again. Red welts a p p e a r e d o n h e r back. N o t raw wel t s b u t light o n e s t h a t w o u l d f ad e with t h e m o r n i n g . He g r o w l e d at h e r b e c a u s e s h e w a n t e d him t o d o so. T h e n h e m a d e love t o h er , violating h e r as s h e s q u i r m e d a n d s t r u g g l e d a n d c l ima xe d again a n d again. Later t h e y lay silently in an e m b r a c e t h a t was t h e n e a r e s t t h e y e v e r g o t to tenderness. "I wi sh . . ." s h e said dreami ly. "Wish what?" he asked. "I wish y ou w e r e . . . well . . . d i f f e r e n t . " " D i f f e r e n t ? " h e a s k e d , k n o w i n g well w h a t s h e m e a n t . "I m e a n , n o t so p e r f e c t , " s h e said. "You k n o w , e x c e p t for a ge , y o u ' r e t o o p er f ec t . I r e m e m b e r Martin. His f ace was badly b u r n e d , t h e w h o l e s id e t w is t ed u p s o t h a t h e c o u l d n ' t smile. T h e r e w as s o m e t h i n g s o beauti ful, so exciting a b o u t his f a c e . " " I ' m s o r r y , " h e said. " N o m a t t e r , " s h e said dr eami ly. " Bu t it w o u l d b e n ice . . . you k n o w , if m a y b e y ou h a d lost an a r m o r m a y b e b e e n badly scarred tonight. O h, I d o n 't know." " I ' m s o r r y, " h e said agai n, b e g i n n i n g t o drift off t o sl e e p. "It' s all right; it's all r i gh t, " s h e said d re ami ly. "I still love y o u . " After a l o n g m o m e n t , s h e said, "It's a l on g t i m e a h e a d . M a y b e s o m e t h i n g will h a p p e n . " " M a y b e , " h e said t¡redly as h e r h a n d d r e am il y m a s s a g e d t h e d e c a y e d mass of flesh a b o u t his b i c e ps . He lay with h e r b r e a t h i n g heavily in his a r m s a n d t h o u g h t t h a t h e w o u l d h a v e t o find s o m e o t h e r w a y of g e tt in g m o n e y s o o n . C u s t o m e r s w e r e h a r d t o c o n t a c t for t h e a m b e r c a ps u le s . Bes ides , h e t h o u g h t , t h e r e w e r e f e w e n o u g h of t h e c a p s u l e s left . . . t h e o n e h e always ca rr ie d h i d d e n in his b o o t heel 125
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a ga in st t h e t i m e h e m i gh t b e t o o badly m a i m e d , t h e o n e he k e p t h e r e in t h e r o o m a n d t h e b ox of p e r h a p s five h e ha d c a c h e d in t h e cellar of t h e c l u b w h e r e t h e y w o r k e d . It was o nl y a m a t t e r of t i m e b e f o r e t h e C o m p a n y finally c a u g h t u p with No r dl i n g , h e s u p p o s e d . That a n c i e n t d e c r e p i t c o u l d barely function n o w and he took useless chances. G o d , h e t h o u g h t , h o w m a n y h a d t h e r e b e e n b e f o r e Nordl¡ng? He h a d k n o w n t h e m all, h e l p e d t h e m b e g i n t h e i r o p e r a t i o n s t o s y n t h e s i z e t h e d e a d l y toxin, t h e o nl y material t h a t c o u l d br in g d e a t h t o a Po lic yholde r. O n e by o n e t h e y ha d b e e n c a u g h t a n d s e n t t o t h e Kr a al s' l ivi ng d e a t h . E v e n t u a l l y , M a l c o l m t h o u g h t , h e t o o w o u l d b e c a u g h t a n d t h e r e w o u l d n o l on ge r b e a ny r e le a se f r o m t h e H e ¡ n h o l t z t r e a t m e n t . He w o u l d lie in t h e Kraals as t h e w o r l d d e c a y e d a n d t h e C o m p a n y , min dl ess in its c o r p o r a t e n e e d t o h o l d p o w e r , w o u l d flicker o u t with t h e w o r l d , like s o m e s m o k y c a n d l e g u t t e r i n g in t h e wi nd . Yes, it wa s inevi tabl e t ha t t h e C o m p a n y w o u l d find N or d li n g s o m e d a y . At t h e m o m e n t h e w as m er el y a t h o r n in its c o r p o r a t e h i d e , cer tai nl y n o t a m a j o r f o r ce m e n a c i n g it. His o p e r a t i o n s w e r e t o o re st ri ct ed , t o o limited in t h e n u m b e r of p e o p l e he mig ht affect. He h a d e n c o u n t e r e d i n c re a si n g difficulty in g e tti ng t h e raw material s for t h e s yn th es i s a n d his p r o d u c t i o n had d r o p p e d alar mi ngl y in t h e last t w o m o n t h s . Besi des Ma lc ol m t h e r e w e r e p e r h a p s a d o z e n p u s h e r s in t h e city w h o d e p e n d e d o n him a n d t h e i r s u p p l y of t h e a m b e r c a p s u l e s h a d b e c o m e very limited r ecent ly, driving t h e price u p several fol d. It was just as well, h e t h o u g h t . Wi th t h e i n c re a si n g p r e s s u r e of t h e b a r r a c u d a s o n h i m , h e n e e d e d e v e r y e x t ra d o l l a r h e c o u l d mar shal . Still, he t h o u g h t d r ea mil y, h e w o u l d always k e e p t h e t w o c a p s u l e s in r es e rv e . O n e for h i m — h e s h o o k his h e a d sadly o n t h e pillow— o n e for Britt if i n d e e d s h e s h o u l d d e c i d e to t a k e a policy with t h e C o m p a n y . He h a d t r ie d t o talk h e r o u t of it, b u t it s e e m e d c er tai n t h a t s h e w o u l d d o it e ve nt ual ly as s h e n e a r e d h e r t r a u m a t i c thirt iet h bi r thday. T h e n , of c o u r s e , s h e w o u l d e v en t ua l l y w a n t o n e of t h e a m b e r s a n d , n o m a t t e r 126
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h o w ba dl y n o w h e n e e d e d m o n e y , h e w o u l d always k e e p o n e in r e s e r v e for her. He dri ft ed into s l e e p , his m i n d ' s e y e i m a gi ng t h a t last m o m e n t w h e n s h e t o o w o u l d join him in t h a t d e a t h t h a t w as d e n i e d t o all of t h e o l d s t e r s . It w o u l d b e a tragically b e au ti f u l th i ng , h e t h o u g h t . Exciting in its o w n way. A pa rt of him t wi st ed at t h e t h o u g h t a n d at t h e physical e v i d e n c e of e x c i t e m e n t it e v o k e d f r o m h i s s a g g i n g b o d y . St i l l— h e l i c k e d h i s lips d r e a mi l y — still it w o u l d b e an e x p e r i e n c e t h e like of wh ic h t h e y h a d n e v e r s h a r e d in t h e i r childish g a m e s of r o p e s a n d belts. All of t ha t, h e t h o u g h t , was a m i mi c k i n g of t h e pain of d e a t h p r o m p t e d by fear. Fear of d e a t h . Well, h e r e m e m b e r e d t h a t e m o t i o n very well . . . In th e b e g in n in g his s o le m o tiv a tio n was fear. H o w d o y o u chara cterize th e fear o f liv in g ? Y o u lo o k at y o u r b o d y a n d y o u s e e it m a tu re , le n g th e n its b o n e s , g ro w fu ll a n d m a tu re , s e e g roin hair fo rm w ith p u b e r ty , th e g ro w th o f g e n ita ls a n d w ith th e m d e sire , a n d h a v in g r e a c h e d th is p o in t o f fu ll a n d c o m p le te d e v e lo p m e n t. . . Y o u fe e l th a t y o u are g r o w in g o ld . W h a t a terrible, fr ig h te n in g fe e lin g a t e ig h te e n to s e e th e in e v ita b le to u c h o f d e a th o n y o u r b o d y . For M a lco lm th e fear o f d e a th c a m e very early, m u c h to o early, n e u ro tic a lly a n d c o m p u ls iv e ly early. W h ich was w h y his w h o le life b e c a m e d e fo r m e d . H e k n e w b e fo r e h e w e n t to c o lle g e w h a t h e m u s t d o . T he sta te o f b io c h e m ic a l a n d p a rticu la rly m o le c u la r b io lo g ica l k n o w le d g e h a d r e a c h e d th e p o in t w h e r e o n e m ig h t c o n c e iv a b ly d o s o m e th in g a b o u t th is in e v ita b le d e a th s e n te n c e . S o h e s tu d ie d . H e ra c e d q u ic k ly th r o u g h his u n d e rg ra d u a te w o rk in b a re ly m o r e th a n tw o years a n d e n te r e d g ra d u a te sc h o o l, im p a tie n t, fille d w ith th e n e e d to k n o w , to g a rn er in fo rm a tio n , to fit all th e b its a n d p ie c e s to g e th e r , to fin d th e u ltim a te a n sw e r to th is terrible c o m p u ls io n th a t o b s e s s e d h im . A fte r his Ph.D . (th a t r o b o t p e r io d w h e n h e c r a m m e d k n o w l e d g e in to his h e a d a n d r e c ite d it b a c k lik e s o m e g ia n t w h ite s k in n e d p arrot, w h ile h e p u r s u e d his ca refu lly d ir e c te d do cto ra l 127
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r e s e a r c h ) h e w a s fr e e a t la s t, fr e e to d o w h a t h e w is h e d . P ro vid ed , o f c o u rse , h e c o u ld fin d th e fu n d in g . W ell, th e re was fu n d in g , a m a ss o f fu n d in g fro m th e p h a rm a c e u tic a l c o m p a n ie s th a t at th a t m o m e n t w e re s w a llo w in g P h .D .'s lik e th e w h a le s w a llo w in g Jo n a h . B ra keley P harm a ceuticals (fa m o u s for A rg o m y c in ) s w a llo w e d h im b u t fo r tu n a te ly h e fo u n d h im s e lf in th e right c o m p a r tm e n t o f th a t m u ltip le s to m a c h . T h e y w ere w o rk in g o n s y n th e tic viruses in th e lab o ra to ry in B ro o klyn w h e re h e f o u n d h im s e lf. Im a g in e a p h a rm a c e u tic a l c o m p a n y , d e v o te d to fu n a n d p ro fit (o h , y e s, very m u c h fo r pro fit), m a n u fa c tu rin g viru ses. W ell, o f c o u rse , it m a k e s s e n s e if o n e c o n sid e rs th a t viru ses are p o te n tia l in fo r m a tio n carriers, as are RNA a n d D N A . A s u ita b ly ta ilo re d virus m a y ta k e its p la c e as a p a rt o f th e g e n e tic ch a in , in d is tin g u is h a b le fro m th e natural n u c le ic a c id ch a in , if o n e c o u ld s u p p r e s s th e n aturally g e n e r a te d c o n tro l factors. T h e y h a d th e id ea o f u s in g an artificial virus to c o u n te r th e natural virus th a t e v e r y o n e n o w k n e w c a u s e d all o f th e varieties o f ca ncer. T h e c a n c e r virus w as e n d e m ic to th e ce ll fro m birth, s u p p r e s s e d b y fa cto rs in th e b o d y u n til failure o c c u rre d a n d th e virus e n te r e d th e c e ll's re p r o d u c tiv e m e c h a n is m . A fte r this p o in t th e ce ll c e a s e d to fo llo w th e o r d a in e d p la n a n d g re w c a n c e ro u s. T h e p la n was to b a la n c e th e natural virus w ith a ta ilo re d o n e th a t w o u ld u n ite in th e cell w ith th e natural g e n e tic m ateria l a n d c a n c e l o u t th e c a n c e r virus. C le v e r. It g a v e h im th e c h a n c e h e n e e d e d , th e to o ls h e n e e d e d . H e b e c a m e in te r e s te d ra th er in a virus th a t w o u ld carry th e g e n e tic p a tte rn fo r in s ta n t re n e w a l o f tis s u e s , for s e le c tiv e a c c e le ra tio n o f m e ta b o lis m , fo r th e re m o v a l o f all th e d e g e n e r a tive p r o c e s s e s th a t c o lle c tiv e ly s p e lle d o ld age. H e s u c c e e d e d . H o w w ell h e s u c c e e d e d w as truly a s to n is h ing. T he la b o ra to ry a n im a ls d id n o t a g e at first. M ore . . . th e y c o u ld n o t b e kille d . T h e y r e p a ire d th e m s e lv e s at a fa n ta stic rate. T h e y w ere im m o rta l. T h e C o m p a n y brass c a m e d o w n from th e glass to w e r in w h ic h t h e y liv e d a n d m a rv e le d at w h a t h e h a d w ro u g h t. 128
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It tu r n e d o u t th a t B ra keley was p a rt o f a c o n g lo m e r a te th a t h a d b e e n a s s e m b le d b y a m a n u fa c tu r e r o f in d u stria l c le a n in g c o m p o u n d s . M ore, th e m a jo r s to c k h o ld e r s o f th e p a r e n t c o r p o ration w e re a lso m e m b e r s o f th e b o a rd o f a m a jo r in su ra n ce c o m p a n y in C o n n e c tic u t. T here was a s u b tle s h ift in financial a lig n m e n t. T he p a r e n t c o m p a n y d iv e s te d its e lf o f B ra keley b y a c o m p l ic a t e d e x c h a n g e o f p a p e r ( c o m p l e t e l y a n d p i o u s l y a p p r o v e d b y th e SEC) a n d B ra keley b e c a m e a part o f th e C o m p a n y , th e U niversal S u r e ty C o m p a n y . H e w as b a ffle d a t th e s e m a n e u v e rs . H e w a n te d o n ly to p u r s u e th e th in g h e h a d m a d e . By n o w th e p r o b le m h a d b e c o m e a p par e n t to h im , th o u g h n o t to th e e n th u s ia s tic c o rp o ra te o fficers. (If th e y r e c o g n iz e d th e p r o b le m , th e y c h o s e to ig n o re it in th e su g a r-p lu m v isio n s o f p r o fit a n d p o w e r .) Still, th e laboratory a n im a ls -th e rats, h a m ste rs, r h e su s m o n k e y s - w e r e tru ly im m o r tal or a t le a st ca p a b le o f life -sp a n s m a n y m u ltip le s o f th e o rd i nary. O n ly, a fte r a stasis p e r io d , th e y d id n 't s to p aging. T h e y a g e d a n d th e y a g e d a n d th e y a g e d , g ro w in g m o re d e c re p it, m o re b u r d e n e d w ith th e a c c r u e d w o u n d s o f living, less agile, m o re n e e d in g o f a tte n tio n , b u t still living. A lw a ys living. W h ich m a tte r e d n o t a d a m n to th e C o m p a n y . T here was a n e w ty p e o f life in su ra n c e . It to o k tim e fo r all th e sta te s to a p p ro v e it. A rka n sa s was th e first. T h e n W a sh in g to n . S u rp ris ingly, California (th e c e n te r o f th e n a tio n a l y o u th cult) was n e x t to last. B y th is tim e fo reig n su b sid ia rie s w ere b u s y w ith th e n e w te c h n iq u e . Pay y o u r m o n th ly p r e m iu m or sig n o v e r a certain p e r c e n ta g e o f y o u r p r e s e n t a n d fu tu re r e s o u r c e s b e c o m e a P o lic y h o ld e r (n o w it was alw ays c a p ita liz e d )-a n d life p e r p e tu a l or at le a st very m u c h e x te n d e d b e c a m e yours. M alco lm w o n d e r e d a n d m a r v e le d a n d fe a r e d a t this. Surely, th e re was s o m e o n e a t th e to p w h o c o u ld s e e th e d a nger, th e terrible d a n g e r o f th is b u r g e o n in g p o lic y . B u t n o co rp o ra tio n is r u le d b y a s in g le m a n . T here is n o c o n tin u ity o f p e rso n a l p o w e r e v e n in a n e a r-im m o rta l co rp o ra tio n . O n e d irecto r g a ve w ay to a n o th e r a n d alw ays th e r e was a b o a rd to a n sw e r to, in n u m e r a b le a n o n y m o u s s to c k h o ld e r s to p la c a te , th e various 129
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a u to n o m o u s g o v e r n m e n ts w h o s e e c o n o m ie s b e c a m e in crea s in g ly im m e r s e d in th e w o rk in g s o f th e C o m p a n y . Like Ju g g e rn a u t, th e w h o le p ro c e ss rolled, a c c e le r a te d a n d c o u ld n o t b e s t o p p e d b y m e n o f g o o d or ill will. In d u e c o u rse th e C o m p a n y d o m in a te d th e w o rld . . . a n d sta g n a te d it w ith a vast p o p u la tio n o f n e a r-im m o rta l b u t c o n sta n tly a g in g m e n . N o o n e k n e w h o w to s to p th e c o m p le x e c o n o m ic m a c h in e r y th a t h a d b e e n sta rted . T here was finally an im m o rta l D ir e c to r a n d M a lco lm to o k th e n e w to xin to him . "T his is h o w w e e n d life ," h e s a id sa d ly, tiredly. " W h o are y o u ? " th e D irector d e m a n d e d . " I'm th e o n e w h o g a v e y o u th e tr e a tm e n t," M alcolm said. T h e D irector s n e e r e d . " S o m e th in g as w o rld -sh a p in g as this th e p r o d u c t o f a sin g le m an? D o n 't b e silly. N o o n e m a n c o u ld c o n c e iv e o f th e H e in h o ltz p rin c ip le a n d carry it to c o m p le tio n .” "I d id ," M a lco lm c h a lle n g e d . "P lea se d o n 't w a ste m y tim e . I'm very b u s y ," th e D irector said. " B e s id e s , w h o w a n ts a to x in th a t kills w h e n w e h a v e etern a l life? " T h e y u s h e r e d h im o u t a n d th a t d a y h e le ft th e ela b o ra te q uarters in B ro o klyn th a t his sta tu s in th e C o m p a n y g a ve h im . H e le ft a n d d is a p p e a r e d a n d g a v e u p all th a t h e h a d ev e r w a n te d . For a lo n g tim e h e d is a p p e a r e d in th e n e w d ru g -d r e n c h e d s u b cu ltu re , trying to fo rg et, tryin g to d ro w n th e so rro w s o f his a g in g b o d y (yes, h e h a d b e e n o n e o f th e first) in th e u se le ss flig h t fro m p sy c h o lo g ic a l reality. E ven tu a lly h e sa w th a t th is to o was a d e a d e n d . M a lc ol m was a w a k e n e d by an i ns is te nt p o u n d i n g o n t h e d o o r . Britt still slept, h e r b o d y c u r l e d i nto a l o o s e fetal pos it i o n whi l e he r w e a l t h of b l o n d hair s p r a w l e d in thi ck locks o v e r t h e faintly soiled pillow. He g a t h e r e d a t h r e a d b a r e s e e r s u c k e r r o b e a b o u t his b o d y a n d o p e n e d t h e d o o r o n its c ha i n. T h r o u g h t h e partially o p e n d o o r h e r e c o g n i z e d Bobby, his r u n n e r , f i d g e t in g n e r v ousl y on t h e d o o r s t e p . " S u r e d e a t h , " B o b b y s w o r e , his t e e t h c h a t t e r i n g a ga ins t t h e m o r n i n g chill. "I ai n' t g o n n a s t a n d o u t h e r e all m o r n i n g . W h y in hell d o n ' t y ou a n s w e r y o u r d o o r ? " 130
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“ I was a s l e e p , " M a lc ol m said irritably. "We ll , I g ot b u s i n e s s for y ou . Big b u s i n e s s . " "How much?" "Five c a p s , " B ob by said, " a n d by t e n t o n i g h t . T h e r e ' s te n t h o u s a n d total in it." " F i f t e e n , " M a l co lm c o u n t e r e d . " You k n o w h o w s h o r t t h e s u p p l y is. I m u s t have t h a t m u c h . " " T w e l v e , " B ob by s n o r t e d . "T h a t' s all my clients say t o settle for." M a lc ol m t h o u g h t . Wi th t h e b a r r a c u d a s p r e s s i n g him o n t h e loan i nt e re s t h e ' d h av e t o sett le for t h a t h e d e c i d e d . " Twel ve it is," h e a g r e e d finally, " b u t n ot t h e M e a t r a c k again. Say back of t h e s h o w after t h e last p e r f o r m a n c e . " B o b b y n o d d e d . "I'll b e t h e r e . Take it easy o n t h e s tr ee t s this m o r n i n g . T hi ngs ar e g e tt in g t ight e v e n this early. " " T h a n k s , " M al co l m said a n d s h u t t h e d o o r . He l e a n e d back a ga in st t h e d o o r a n d s h u d d e r e d . He d i d n ' t like t o g e t o n t h e s t r e et s until a f t e r n o o n , b u t h e ' d h a v e to g e t t o t h e c l ub a nd r e s c u e his c a c h e b e f o r e a ny of t h e o t h e r p e r s o n n e l s h o w e d up. It was b a d e n o u g h g e t t i n g t o it with o n l y t h e c l e an i ng w o m e n p r e s e n t b u t later it w o u l d b e a l m o s t i m p os s i bl e . If he c o u l d h av e t h o u g h t of a b e t t e r pl ace t o h i d e t h e c a p s u l e s , he w o u l d h a ve l on g a go. As it wa s , t h e c l u b wa s a b o u t t h e b e s t place. As Britt st irred a n d slowly c a m e a w a k e , h e p r e p a r e d br eakf ast . He u s e d t h e i r last e g g wi th s o m e s oya p a s t e a n d s p i n a c h to m a k e an o m e l e t . It was lean e n o u g h fare t o b eg i n a trying d a y b u t until h e c o u l d g e t s o m e m o r e m o n e y t h e y ' d h av e to m a k e do . T he tips at t h e c l ub h a d b e e n s p a r s e e n o u g h lately a n d t h e y still h a d a w e e k t o r un b e f o r e payday. H e f li pp ed t h e o m e l e t e xp e rt l y with l o n g y e ar s of pract ice, di vi de d it in p o r t i o n s of o n e - t h i r d a n d t wo -t hi r ds . T h e larger p o r t i o n h e c a rr i ed o v e r t o t h e b e d , w h e r e Britt w as n o w sitting u p , bl in ki ng at t h e light t h a t s t r e a m e d f rom t h e b a r r e d w i n d o w . " G o o d m o r n i n g , l ov e, " s h e said b e t w e e n y a w ns . " O h , t ha t' s nice o f y ou. O n l y " — s h e w r i n k l e d h e r n o s e — " I ' m g e tt i n g tired of soya o m e l e t s . " 131
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“ T h e r e w o n ' t b e a n y m o r e for a w h i l e , " h e said. " T ha t was o u r last e g g . " “ O h , " s h e said, l o o k i n g as if s h e w e r e a b o u t to cry. “ I've g o t a c u s t o m e r , " h e said quickly. “ B ob b y c a m e a n d t h e y w a n t five c a p s . " " Th a t' s d a n g e r o u s , " s h e said. " Yo u k n o w h o w c l o se t h e c o n st able s c a m e t h e last t i me y o u s u p p l i e d a party. O n e is b a d e n o u g h , b u t a party get s a lot of a t t e n t i o n . " “ I d o n ' t k n o w t h at it is a p a r t y, " h e said. “ Wi th t h a t m a n y a m b e r s , it's always a pa r ty ," s h e said, d o w n ing t h e last of h e r o m e l e t a n d m a k i n g a faint g e s t u r e of di stas te as s h e s h o v e d t h e e m p t y pl ate a cr os s t h e b e d . “ Any c of f ee ?" He s h o o k his h e a d . He r f ace f o r m e d a disti nct p o u t . W ell, h e ll, h e t h o u g h t , w h a t d o e s s h e e x p e c t ì I c a n 't k e e p th e p la c e in fo o d w h e n s h e s p e n d s it all o n c lo th e s a n d m a k e -u p . W h o n o tic e s in th e d im lig h ts o f th e d u b ì But s h e h a d t o have t h e b e st , as t h o u g h s h e w e r e u n d e r t h e c l o se st scrutiny. “ W e ' v e g o t s o m e t e a , " h e said. He d i d n ' t tell h e r it was s ynthe t ic , h o p i n g t h a t s h e w o u l d n o t n ot i ce. For tu n a te ly s h e d i d n ' t a n d sat si p pi ng t h e h o t b r o w n liquid as h e d r e s s e d . “ Y o u 'r e g o i n g o u t ? " s h e a s k e d in s u d d e n alarm. “ To ge t t h e c a p s , " h e said. “ I have t o g e t t o t h e club b e f o r e t h e da y p e r s o n n e l s h o w u p . " “ Take c a r e , " s h e said. “ If y o u r u n i nto a n y t h i n g , f o r g e t t h e caps a n d c o m e h o m e . " " W e n e e d t h e m o n e y , " h e said. The m o r n i n g s u n li g h t was b l i n d i n g w h e n he s t e p p e d f ro m t h e a p a r t m e n t o n t o t h e s tr ee t . He l o o k e d carefully t o t h e right a n d left b u t t h e alley was d e s e r t e d . He t u r n e d f r o m t h e alley o n t o t h e littered t h o r o u g h f a r e a n d w a l k e d for t h r e e b loc ks b e f o r e h e b e c a m e a w a r e t h a t t h e s tr e et was p e o p l e d largely by o l d s te r s. T h e r e w e r e several g r o u p s of c o n s t a b l e s a l o n g t h e way. He w o n d e r e d w h a t this mi ght signify b u t h e felt relatively safe in s u c h c r o w ds . He c o v e r e d t h e s e v e n b l oc ks t o t h e c l ub in an h o u r , p a u s i n g peri odicall y t o rest. He w a l k e d q u i t e regularly, b u t as h e g r e w
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o l d e r , t h e fat igue of c o ve r i n g e v e n t w o b l o c ks w e i g h e d heavily o n him. At t h e cl ub, h e p a u s e d a n d l e a n e d a gai ns t t h e side of t h e bui ld in g t o ge t his b r e a t h . He w as q u i t e u n p r e p a r e d for t h e a p p e a r a n c e of t h e c o n s t a b l e in t h e d o o r of t h e club. “ W h a t are you d o in g h e re , old m a n ? " th e c o n s ta b le demanded. M a lc ol m t h o u g h t of telling him t h a t h e w o r k e d t h e r e , b u t a s ix th s e n s e w a r n e d h im t o b e s i l e n t . “ R e s t i n g , ” h e s ai d b r eathlessly. " We l l , y o u just m o v e a l o n g , " t h e c o n s t a b l e said. He n o d d e d silently a n d m o v e d away. At t h e alley, h e c o n s i d e r e d g o i n g in t h e s ide d o o r , b u t h e s a w t h a t t h e r e wa s a n o t h e r c o n s t a b l e p o s t e d t h e r e . His h e a rt s an k f o r a m o m e n t . W h a t w e r e t h e y d oi ng ? Wa s it p o s s i b l e . . . ? " M a l c o l m , ge t t h e hell away f r om h e r e , " a w o m a n ' s voi ce said n e a r him. He t u r n e d as Felice g r a b b e d his e l b o w . Her y el lo wi ng w h i t e hair w as ba dl y d i sa r ra y e d ; h e r b l o o d s h o t eyes b u r i e d in i n n u m e r a b l e fol ds of flesh w e r e w i d e a n d e x cit ed. " T h e m c o n s t a b l e s is r o u g h i n g e v e r y b o d y u p , " s h e said. " B e tt e r g e t a w a y. " "W hat's h a p p e n ed ? " he d e m an de d. " T h e y f o u n d a b u n c h o f a m b e r s in t h e b a s e m e n t . O n e of o u r p e o p l e m u s t have hid t h e m t h e r e . " " A m b e r s ? " h e a s k e d . " N o t in t h e c l u b ? " " O h , C o d , " s h e said. "I w i s h e d I'd k n o w n . W h a t I w o u l d n ' t give f or just o n e . " " Yo u d o n ' t m e a n t h a t , " h e said. Sh e s i g h e d . " Yo u j ust d o n ' t k n o w h o w badl y I m e a n it." H e r e y e s b e g a n t o mist a n d in a s e c o n d s h e s t o o d b l u b b e r i n g like a small child. "J us t t h a t c l o se a n d I d i d n ' t k n o w . I'd n e v e r h av e e n o u g h m o n e y t o b u y o n e a n d t h e y was t h a t c l o s e . " She e y e d him t h e n with s u s p i c i o n d a w n i n g in h e r eyes. H e fled, leaving h e r s o b b i n g like s o m e m e c ha n i c al doll w h o h a d b e e n p r o g r a m m e d t o e n d l e s s repet iti ve s o r r o w . O n t h e s t r e e t h e was c a u g h t u p in t h e f low of traffic. Surprisingly, t h e r e w e r e still a large n u m b e r of o l d s t er s h ur r yi ng a l o n g a n d
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h e s u d d e n l y r eali zed t h a t a d e m o n s t r a t i o n m u s t b e f or mi ng . He t u r n e d , t h i n k i n g t ha t h e m u s t ge t a wa y f r o m h e r e . At t h e o p p o s i t e e n d of t h e s t r e e t a line of c o n s t a b l e s was f or mi ng, t h e i r riot b a t o n s l i nke d elect rifi ed tip t o el ect r if i ed tip as t h e y m o v e d f o r wa r d. All of t h e m ca rr i e d h a n d - g r e n a d e l a u n c h e r s o n t h e i r belts a n d several l a b o r e d u n d e r t h e w e i g h t of flame throwers. He l o o k e d t o t h e right a n d left, h o p i n g s o m e h o w t ha t he c o u l d e v a d e t h e c r es t i ng f l o o d of h u m a n it y . If h e c o u l d g e t away, h e c o u l d still find N or dl ing. He was onl y a f e w blocks away; h e n e v e r v e n t u r e d f or t h n o w , d e p e n d i n g o n f r ie nd s for w h a t f o o d h e c o n s u m e d , living onl y for t h e st i nk i ng b a s e m e n t u n d e r his s ha c k w h e r e t h e filthy g l a s swa re s p r a w l e d t o t h e ceiling, t h e Sox hl et e xt r ac t or s gurling, t h e c a l c i u m - e n c r u s t e d c o n d e n s e r d r i p p i n g o u t its s lo w a m b e r d r o ps . The s t r e e t s w e r e filling rapidly n o w w it h t h e o l d s t e r s , m a n y of t h e m l a m e a n d h o b b l i n g . M o s t of t h e m e n w e r e a c c o m p a n i e d by y o u n g e r w o m e n , m a n y of t h e s e half s u p p o r t i n g t h e i r e s c or t s as t h e y c o n v e r g e d o n t h e plaza f r o n ti ng t h e C o m p a n y ' s d o w n t o w n h e a d q u a r t e r s . M a lc o lm c o u l d s e e t ha t a n o t h e r line of c o n s t a b l e s , a r m e d with g r e n a d e l a u n c h e r s a n d several p o r t a b l e f lame t h r o w e r s , h a d d r a w n u p in f ro n t of t h e plaza, b a c k e d by several a r m e d lorries. T h e t e n s e g r o u p o f c o n s t a b l e s r inge d t h e g r e at o b s i d i a n s t a t ue in t h e plaza, its g o l d e n - b l a c k h a n d s s t r e t c h i n g o u t w a r d o v e r t h e plaza, c u p p e d t o b e a r t h e small s i m u l a c r u m of a limp h u m a n f or m. T he C o m p a n y called it S u c cor. M al co l m h a t e d its p e r v e r s e s ym b ol i s m . Be h in d t h e s t a t ue t w o t u r r e t e d he av y f la me t h r o w e r s c r o u c h e d me na ci ng l y. Ma lc ol m f o u n d hi ms el f s u d d e n l y h a l t e d in a c r u s h of b o d i e s . The s q u a r e b e f o r e t h e pl aza was filled with o ld p e o p l e , m a n y of t h e m c arryi ng t h e t a t t e r e d y e ll ow b a n n e r s of t h e R e t r e n c h m e n t Party. T h e y s t o o d silently, waiting. A d r e a d f u l m e n a c i n g s il enc e s et t l ed o v e r t h e plaza. “ Your right t o a s s e m b l e will b e p r o t e c t e d ; n o w , g o h o m e , " a voice b o o m e d o u t f ro m a p u b l i c - a d d r e s s s y s te m. It w a s t h e Di r e c to r' s voice. Ma lc ol m h a d n o t h e a r d it in year s b u t h e r e c o g n i z e d it. 134
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Several of t h e old p e o p l e h o i s te d a b a n n e r . T he w ind w h o p p e d at it, r ippl ing t h e w o r d s . T h ey s h o u t e d : " T h e W o r l d Is Starving. POLICY RETRENCHMENT N O W ! " C o h o m e , " t h e D ir ec to r' s vo i ce b o o m e d . " Y o u ' v e h a d y o u r say. T he C o m p a n y ' s policies a r e o p e n t o e v e r y o n e . " A r a g ge d w a ve o f v oi ce s f l o w e d f r om t h e c r o w d , old t h r oa t s c rying t h r e a t s a n d p r ot e st . " G o h o m e o r t h e c o n s t a b l e s will t a k e a c t i o n , " t h e v o i c e shouted. " R e t r e n c h m e n t n o w , " o ld voi ces s c r e a m e d a n d w i t h e r e d fists t h r u s t a b o v e t h e c r o w d like a s u d d e n s t a n d o f a n c i e n t w h e a t . T h e line o f c o n s t a b l e s b e g a n t o m o v e f o r w a r d , e l e c tr o s t i n g e r s at t h e ready. From s o m e w h e r e in t h e f o r e f r o n t of t h e c r o w d a p aving brick sailed o u t a n d s t r u c k o n e of t h e c o n s t a b l e s o n t h e t e m p l e . He f o l d e d slowly t o t h e p a v e m e n t . O t h e r s w e r e r i pp i ng u p p avi ng b l o c ks a n d pi e ce s o f m a c a d a m . T h e line of c o n s t a b l e s f al te re d b e f o r e t h e s u d d e n a ss a ul t of missiles, t h e n t h e line h a r d e n e d a n d it b e g a n t o m o v e f o r w ar d again. M a lc ol m s aw t h e i r y o u n g e ye s, b r igh t a n d g r e e d y b e n e a t h t h e i r visors, t h e i r faces grimly j o y o u s in an ti ci pa ti on of t h e attack. M a n y d r e w t h e i r l a un c h e r s . T h e c r o w d b e g a n t o d i s p e r s e , t h e ol d m e n m o v i n g b a ck p a i n fully. H o w o f t e n ha d h e s e e n this, this silent g a t h e r i n g of misery? T h e c o n s t a b l e s b e g a n t o relax. It was all o v e r , h e t h o u g h t , m o v i n g b ac k a n d trying for a s id e s t r e e t t h a t s u d d e n l y o p e n e d t o his left. It w a s all o ve r, a c o m p l e t e l y i neffect ual , t h o r o u g h l y futile p r o t e s t w i t h o u t l e a d er s , w i t h o u t an s t a t e m e n t of n e e d . O l d m e n did n o t m a k e d e m a n d s , h e t h o u g h t ; t h e y m e r el y s t o o d patheti cal ly a n d w a i t e d f or s o m e o n e t o s u c c o r t h e m . Patheti c m e n , h e t h o u g h t . D e a d m e n w h o s e b o d i e s still s o m e h o w ca rr ie d t h e spasti c fire of life. Like m y s e lf, h e t h o u g h t . "I a m Lazarus, c o m e fro m th e d e a d ," h e t h o u g h t . " C o m e b a c k to te ll y o u all, I sh a ll te ll y o u a ll." I am Lazarus a n d P rufrock, his m i n d said, a n d J o s e p h o f A rim a th ea a n d th e g h o s t o f Caligula a n d A lastair C ro w ley, c lu tc h in g d e c a y to m y b re a st saying, " L o o k w h a t I h a v e w r o u g h t." H e s t a r t e d t o m o v e away, c o n s c i o u s of t h e black m o o d of 135
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d e f e a t s ett ling o v e r t h e old m e n . The first hint of t r o u b l e yet t o c o m e w as a d is ta nt m u r m u r t h a t g r e w l o u d e r . He t u r n e d t o s e e a c r o w d of y o u n g m e n spilling into t h e plaza, t h e i r ey e s b r i g ht with h a t re d . O h , G o d , h e t h o u g h t , I've g o t to g e t aw a y fro m here. T oo late. Th e y o u n g m e n c o n v e r g e d o n t h e c r o w d of d i s p e r s ing o l d s t e r s . He h e a r d s h o u t s of “ Par as ites " a n d " L e e c h e s " as t h e t w o f or c es c o n v e r g e d . In an i n s a n e c o r n e r of his eye, h e s aw t h e c o n s t a b l e s d r a w i n g back. Their f aces g l o w e d with a nt i c i pa t i o n; t h e i r e ye s w e r e bri ght with t h e an ti ci pa ti on of t h e conflict. He h e a r d t h e p o p of a c h e mi ca l m a t c h a n d k n e w s o m e o n e h a d a r m e d a f la me t h r o w e r . M a lc ol m k n e w h e h a d t o g e t a w a y . T h e only c h a n n e l of e s c a p e was t h e e d g e of t h e pl aza b u t this w o u l d b r i ng him c los e t o t h e o u t e r ranks o f t h e c o n s t a b l e s . He p a u s e d in i nd ec is io n a n d t h e n d e c i d e d t ha t h e w o u l d h a ve t o risk it. From t h e far s i de of t h e c r o w d h e h e a r d s h o u t s of rage a n d cries of pain a n d h e k n e w t ha t t h e t w o m o b s h a d j o i n e d in c o m b a t . Frustrat ing, u se le ss c a r n a g e b u t h e c o u l d n o t g e t involved. He b e g a n t o sp r in t a l o n g t h e e d g e of t h e c r o w d , his a n c i e n t h e a rt l abor i ng with t h e e xe rt io n. He was a b r e a s t o f t h e c o n s t a b l e s n o w, p ass in g a r o u n d t he ir ranks. “ You, s t o p , " an officer yel led a n d h e real ized t h a t he h ad b e e n s e e n . He t r i e d t o i n c r e a s e his s p e e d b u t t h e y o u n g officer a l m o s t c o n t e m p t u o u s l y c a u g h t u p with him a n d in an i ns ta nt g r a b b e d him, p i n i o n i n g his a r m s to his side. " D a m n , I t o l d y ou t o h a lt , " t h e officer said a n d t h e n yel led, " S e r g e a n t , t a k e c ar e of t his m a n . " A c o n s t a b l e s e r g e a n t ran f r om t h e rear r anks a n d t h e officer r e l e a s e d him as t h e s e r g e a n t m e n a c e d him with his e l e c t r o s t i n g er. He h e a r d s c r e a m s as t h e c o n s t a b l e s o p e n e d fire o n t h e m o b with l a u n c h e r s . Again a n d again h e h e a r d t h e w h o o s h o f f l a m e t h r o w e r s . O v e r all t h i s c a m e w a v e o n w a v e o f a n g u i s h e d s c r e am i ng . "I h a v e n ' t d o n e a n y t h i n g , " M a l c o l m w h i n e d . He t r i e d t o a p p e a r w e a k a n d ineffectual b u t a part of him was s u r p r i s e d 136
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t o d i s co v e r t h a t his cri ng in g s t a n c e wa s n o t c o m p l e t e l y a n act. He was f r i g h t e n e d a n d t h e p o t e n t mu sc u la r it y of t h e s e r g e a n t i n t i mi d a t e d him. “ B ra ce ," t h e s e r g e a n t s aid a n d b e g a n t o s e a r c h him. He s u d d e n l y r e m e m b e r e d t ha t h e c o u l d n o t b e s e a r c h e d . T he m a n ' s h a n d s drifted o v e r his b o d y a n d h e b o l t e d , h o p i n g for o n e i n s a n e i ns t ant t ha t h e mig ht e s c a p e . The m a n l a u n c h e d hi msel f in a low tackl e a n d b r o u g h t Ma lc ol m t o t h e g r o u n d . The i mpa ct d r o v e t h e b r e a t h fr om his b od y. H a n d s p u l l e d at his clo th in g, t u r n i n g o u t his p o c k e t s , a n d t h e n t h e s e r g e a n t h a d t h e plastic b ox t h a t h e still c ar r ie d, t h e b o x t h a t c o n t a i n e d t h e a m b e r c a p s u l e f o r his client. He s h u d d e r e d , h o p ¡ n g t h a t t h e m a n w o u l d n o t find t h e o n e s e c r e t e d in t h e h o l l o w h eel of his b o o t . T h e m a n h a d f o u n d w h a t h e w a n t e d , h o w e v e r . He s h o u t e d a n d t h e officer h u r r i e d o v e r. “ An a m b e r . " T h e officer l a u g h e d . " Tha t m e a n s a leave for b o t h of us, c a t c h i n g a p u s h e r . " He s l a p p e d t h e s e r g e a n t o n t h e b a ck a n d t h e n s e lf - cons c iousl y r e c o v e r e d his dignity. " I ' m n o t a p u s h e r , " M al co l m p r o t e s t e d . “ W h e r e d i d y ou g e t t h e a m b e r ? " t h e officer d e m a n d e d . "I st ol e it," Ma lc ol m a n s w e r e d . " O n e of t h e m e n in t h e c r o w d d r o p p e d it. I p i c k e d it u p a n d r a n . " “ Frankly, o ld m a n , I d o n ' t b e li ev e y o u , " t h e officer said. " We 'l l s e e if t h e c o lo n e l d o e s . " He a d d r e s s e d t h e s e r g e a n t , " Ta ke him a l o n g . " The s e r g e a n t p i n i o n e d M a l c o l m ' s a r m s b e h i n d him a n d half d r a g g e d hi m, skirting t h e strife-torn plaza, t o a small c o m p o u n d w h e r e t h e r e w e r e a l r e ad y several p r i s o n e r s . Ma lc ol m was t h r us t b e h i n d a f e n c e d a n d g u a r d e d wi r e b a r r i c a d e t ha t h a d b e e n t h r o w n u p in t h e last h o u r . From t h e r e h e c o u l d s e e t h e final s c e n e s of t h e bat tl e b e t w e e n t h e y o u n g s t e r s a n d t h e old m e n . The c o n s t a b l e s w e r e b r e a k i n g it u p n o w a n d t h e plaza was d o t t e d with w r i th i ng b o d i e s of y o u n g a n d o ld m e n , m a n y of t h e m hor ri bl y b u r n e d in t h e cr oss fire f ro m several t u r r e t e d f la me t h r o w e r s . S o m e of t h e b o d i e s w e r e still a n d h e real ized t h a t par t of t h e a t t a c ki ng f o r ce h a d b e e n y o u n g m e n w h o w e r e 137
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n o t P oli cyhol der s. St r an g e t ha t t h e y w o u l d risk t h e i r lives in s u c h a s e n s e l e s s fight. He c o u l d u n d e r s t a n d t h e mo ti vat ion of t h e y o u n g Po li cyholder s. T h e r e w e r e f ew e n o u g h r e s o u r c e s left in t h e w o r l d with t h e w o r k f or ce so d i m i n i s h e d a n d t h e o l d s t e r s r e p r e s e n t e d a large u n p r o d u c t i v e s e g m e n t . Better in t h e i r e y e s t o carry t h e m all off t o t h e Kraals, w h e r e at least in t h e i r s u s p e n d e d e x i s t e n c e t h e i r c o n s u m p t i o n w o u l d b e reduced to a minimum. G u a r d s c a m e n o w a n d b e g a n t o r e m o v e p r i s o n e r s o n e by o n e for d i s p o si t i on . He w a i t e d his t u r n impat ient ly, w o n d e r i n g w h a t w o u l d h a p p e n . W o u l d t h e y b a n is h hi m t o t h e Kraals or simply i m p o s e a lien o n his basic ration? G o d k n o ws , it was h a r d e n o u g h t o exist in this d e c a y i n g m a ss of s t o n e a n d brick t h a t h a d o n c e b e e n a city b u t h e c o u l d survive t h a t with t h e h e l p of Britt. W h e n t h e g u a r d c a m e t o t h e g at e a n d b e c k o n e d for him, he c a m e f o r w a r d hesitantly. He w as led t h r o u g h t h e wi r e a n d d o w n a line of c o n s t a b l e s , n o w at e a s e a n d relaxing, t o a c a m p t abl e w h e r e a m a n with e agle s o n his f a ti gue j ac ke t l o o k e d so b er l y at him. " T h e l i e u t e n a n t says y o u ' r e a p u s h e r , " t h e c o l o n e l said tiredly. M a lc o lm r e p e a t e d his story. T h e c o l o n e l l o o k e d at him as if h e d i d n ' t exist. T h e n h e leaf ed t h r o u g h t h e f o r g e d identification p a p e r s t h e l i e u t e n a n t h ad t a k e n f r o m Ma lc olm. " N o p r ev io u s r e c o r d , " t h e c o l o n e l said. " W h a t t h e hell m a d e y o u steal t hi s?" " W o u ld n 't you have d o n e th e sam e th in g ? ” Malcolm d e m a n d e d tiredly. The c o l o n e l p u r s u e d his lips. " I ' m n o t t h a t old, ol d m a n . " "You will b e s o m e d a y , " Ma lc ol m said. T he c o l o n e l held a w h i s p e r e d c o n v e r s a t i o n with t h e l ieu t e n a n t . Finally h e l o o k e d u p a n d said, " W e ' v e h a d e n o u g h t r o u b l e t o d a y. Your r e c o r d is cl ean. I'll m a k e an e n t r y a n d let y ou go. The next t i m e you'll b e in s e r i o u s t r o u b l e . " " T h a n k y o u , " M a lc ol m said. T h e c o l o n e l said n o t h i n g . T he l i e u t e n a n t d e t a i l e d a m a n t o t a k e him b a c k t h r o u g h t h e ranks of c o n s t a b l e s a n d o n t h e e d g e of t h e plaza t h e ma n 138
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r e l e a s e d him. M al co l m s i g h e d , realizing t h a t h e ha d s o m e h o w e s c a p e d . T h e f o r g e d p a p e r s still h el d u p. Well, t h e y h a d b e e n d o n e by an e x p e r t m a n y y e a rs a g o , j u s t af ter his s u r g er y , a n d h e h a d b e e n s u r e t h a t t h e y w o u l d p ass. T h e p o s s e s s i o n of t h e a m b e r wa s a n o t h e r m a t t e r a n d t h e c o l o n e l was t o o tired of t h e w h o l e m e s s a p p a r e n t l y t o p u r s u e that. H e felt a v a g u e u n e a s e at h o w easily h e ha d e s c a p e d b u t h e t u r n e d a n d r e t r a c e d his earl ier s t e p s. He still h a d t o s e e Nordl ¡ng. W i t h o u t t h e m o n e y f r o m t h e o r d e r B o bb y h a d b r o u g h t , h e t h o u g h t fearfully, h e w o u l d b e u n a b l e t o m e e t his w e e k l y p a y m e n t s t o t h e b a r r a cud as . It w as o v e r a mile t o No r dl ¡ ng 's h o u s e , a d e c a y i n g brick s h a c k t h a t o p e n e d o n a s t r e e t w h o s e walks w e r e piled high with f e s te r in g g a r b a g e . He c l i m b e d t h e s p l i n t e r e d s t e p s t h a t p o p p e d a n d c r e a k e d u n d e r his w ei g h t. T he y h a d l o n g a g o lost any t r ac e of t h e pai nt t h a t o n c e p r o t e c t e d t h e m a n d e a c h s t e p M a lc o lm t o o k c a u s e d a c l o u d o f d u s t a n d w o o d p o w d e r t o puff f r o m t h e joints of t h e s t e p s . H e t a p p e d t h e c o d e d t a p a n d s a w N or d l¡ n g' s w i t h e r e d h a n d pull a s i d e a r a in -s tr ea ke d p i e c e o f c an va s t o l oo k o u t . W h e n No r dl ¡ ng r e c o g n i z e d him, h e p u l l e d t h e d o o r half o p e n a n d s p o k e . “ Inside, i ns ide , d o n ' t c a m p o u t t h e r e . You k n o w h o w d a n g e r o u s t h e s t r e et s a r e. ' ' H e led M a lc ol m t h r o u g h a d a n k - s m e l l i n g hall, half d e n u d e d of p last er . T he walls c a n t e d at a d is ti nct a n g l e as t h o u g h part of t h e f o u n d a t i o n h a d c o l l a p s e d . At t h e h e a d o f t h e b a s e m e n t stairs, N o r d l¡ n g p a u s e d a n d s h i v e r e d. “ I ha d t h r e e y o u n g ' u n s b r e a k in last ni ght. T h a n k G o d , t h e locks o n t h e b a s e m e n t a re g o o d . " “ I n e e d five c a p s , " M a lc o lm said impatiently. "I just let y o u h av e five a w e e k a g o , " N o r dl ¡ ng w h i n e d . " W h a t h a p p e n e d t o t h e m ? " M a lc o lm t o l d him. N or dl ¡ n g led t h e wa y d o w n t h e stairs t o t h e b a s e m e n t . He a d j u s t e d a m a n t l e light a n d M a lc o lm l o o k e d a r o u n d . T he pl ac e was w e b b e d with c o b w e b s e x c e p t for t h e a re a w h e r e N ordl¡ng had s e t up th e a p p a r a t u s . M a l c ol m n o t e d t h e a r r a n g e m e n t of g l a s s w a re — t h e m o l e c u l a r still, wi t h its r ust y v a c u u m p u m p ; t h e So xh l et e x t r a c 139
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t o r n e a r at h a n d , its flask filled with b u b b l i n g g r e e n - s t a i n e d e t h e r ; t h e t h r e e - n e c k e d r e a c t o r t h a t p r o d u c e d t h e final a m b e r material t h a t w e n t i nto t h e m o l e c u l a r still. This last s t e p was n e c e s s a r y s i n c e s e c o n d a r y c o n t a m i n a n t s fr om t h e r ea ct i o n c a n c e l e d t h e e ff e ct iv en e ss o f t h e pr imar y t oxin. “ I've g o t t o h ave t h e c a p s , " Ma lc ol m insisted. “ Well, if it was a n y b o d y b u t y ou . . ." N or d l i n g sniffed. “ T h e d a n g e r of g e t t i n g t h e mat er ial s, n o t t o m e n t i o n t h e c os t . . ." " Y o u ' v e always g o t t e n y o u r m o n e y , " Ma lc ol m said. " B es i d e s , w h o s e t y o u u p in t h e b u s i n e s s t o start wi t h ? " “ You h ad y o u r r e a s o n s , " N or dl in g said. " O n l y w h a t if t h e constables ever— " " T h e w o r s t t h e y w o u l d d o w o u l d b e t o p u t y o u in t h e Kraals a n d y o u ' v e b e e n e x p e c t i n g t h a t for y e a r s . " “ W o u l d t o o , if it w a s n ' t f or t h e special f o r m u l a , " N or dl in g said. " We l l, t h a t ' s p a y m e n t e n o u g h , " Ma lc ol m said. “ S o m e t i m e s I wi sh t h e hell I'd n e v e r m e t y o u , " N or d l in g said. " Y o u ' d h av e b e e n in t h e Kraals l on g a g o if y o u h a d n ' t , " Mal c o l m said. N o rd l i ng s o r t e d t h r o u g h t h e c o n t e n t s of a d r a w e r in t h e rickety t a b le u n d e r t h e still. " H e r e , " h e said. "I 'v e g o t just five. You'll t a k e all I've g o t a n d I b e t y o u d i d n ' t b r i n g a ny money." Ma lc ol m t o o k t h e five a m b e r c a p s ul e s . "You' ll ge t y o u r m o n e y , " h e said. N o r d l i n g s mi le d sourly. "I'll s e e y ou t o t h e d o o r , " h e said. T he y a s c e n d e d t h e s t e p s f r o m t h e b a s e m e n t t o t h e hall. Mal c ol m p u s h e d o p e n t h e d o o r a n d s t o p p e d . Bef or e h e c o ul d pull ba ck , t h e d o o r flew a ga in s t t h e wall a n d a large h a n d g r a b b e d at him. Be hi nd him, N o r d l i n g cr ied o u t a high, w o m a n ish cry. T he hall was filled wi th c o n s t a b l e s a n d t h e h a n d t h a t g r a b b e d at M a lc ol m b e l o n g e d t o t h e s e r g e a n t w h o h a d s e i z e d him earlier in t h e day. Felice w as with t h e m , s c r e a m i n g , " S e e , s e e , I t ol d you h e w as t h e o n e . I f o l l o w e d hi m. He 's t h e o n e . " 140
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B eh ind t h e s e r g e a n t , t h e l i e u t e n a n t g r i n n e d knowi ng ly . " W e t h o u g h t y o u ' d lead us t o t h e s u p p l i e r , " t h e l i e u t e n a n t said. "Like a d a m n fool, you c a m e right t o h i m . " They t o o k t h e m b a c k t o t h e a l u m i n u m - a n d - g l a s s h e a d q u a r t e rs of t h e C o m p a n y , p as t t h e t o r n a n d b la s t e d plaza w h e r e s c a v e n g e r s w e r e still g a t h e r i n g t h e w o u n d e d a n d t h e d e a d . In t h e s u b b a s e m e n t s w h e r e p r i s o n e r s w e r e held a n d i n t e r r o g a t e d t h e y m a d e b o t h o f t h e m strip t o t h e i r s h o r t s a n d t h e y w e r e s e p a r a t e d . M a l co lm f o u n d hims el f i m p r i s o n e d in a n a r r o w cell w ith w h i t e p o u r e d - c o n c r e t e walls. It wa s w i t h o u t w i n d o w s a n d a mer ci l ess w h i t e f l u o r e s c e n t light b e a t d o w n o n him, p ryi ng its wa y u n d e r his e y e s w h e n h e lay o n t h e c o t s u s p e n d e d f r o m t h e wall a n d tr ied t o sle ep . He lost tr ack of t i me . He mi g ht h av e b e e n t h e r e h o u r s or days. He k n e w onl y t h a t h e wa s c ol d a n d t h a t t h e si ngle fragile c o v er l e t was i nsufficient t o s t o p his shi veri ng. Part of t h e sh¡vering, of c o u r s e , was r e ac ti on . He felt a dull d r e a d o p p r e s s i n g his m i n d a n d h e k n e w t h a t it w as o n l y a m a t t e r of t i m e b e f o r e t h e y w o u l d c o m e for him. He h a d h e a r d t h e st or ies of C o m p a ny i nt e rr o g a t i o n s . In a w o r l d w h e r e physical d a m a g e to t h e b o d y was r e p a i r e d in m i n u t e s , t h e r e was n o pa rt ic ul a r moral o n u s t o t o r t u r e a n d t h e C o m p a n y had, h e h e a r d , d e v e l o p e d s o m e ver y r e fi ne d ways o f h a n d l i n g t h o s e f r o m w h o m it w o u l d ex tr act i n f or ma t io n . He h o p e d t h a t t h e y w o u l d c o n s i d e r him small fry. N or dl in g was q u i t e a n o t h e r m a t t e r a n d h e i m a g i n e d t h a t t h e y w o u l d e x p e n d t h e i r b e s t efforts o n him. N o rd l i ng w as n o t a s t r o n g ma n. It wa s , t h e r e f o r e , i ne vi ta bl e t h a t h e w o u l d c o m p r o m i s e Ma lc ol m. W h e n t h e y c a m e finally for h im , M a lc o lm s u p p o s e d t h a t t h e y w o u l d h av e t h e w h o l e story. T he y c o u l d n o t afford t o r e l e a s e h im a n d h e was s u r e t h a t t h e Kraals w e r e n o t for him. He t h o u g h t of t h e a lt e rn ati ve s a n d real ized t h a t onl y his d e a t h w o u l d satisfy t h e m . So b e it. In this t e rr i bl e wo r ld of w h i c h h e was a part, in w h i c h h e h a d pl a ye d t o o m u c h of a f or ma t iv e role, it was just as well. He k n e w n o w at long last t h a t h e w o u l d w e l c o m e t h e e n d of c o n s c i o u s n e s s . I n d e e d , 141
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h e s h o u l d h av e c h o s e n t h a t w ay l on g ago. N o w t ha t t h e y ha d t h e a m b e r s e c r e t e d in his b o o t a n d h e was u n a b l e t o g e t to t h e o n e in his a n d Britt's a p a r t m e n t , h e w as wh ol ly d e p e n d e n t o n t h e m . T h e y w o u l d give him w h a t h e w a n t e d . He w a s d o z i n g uneas il y w h e n t h e y finally c a m e for him. Th e l i e u t e n a n t a n d t h e s e r g e a n t lifted him f r o m t h e b u n k a n d d r a g g e d him u n p r o t e s t i n g a l o n g t h e sterile c o r r i d o r s to a large r o o m . T h e c o lo n e l sat at a t a b le at o n e e n d of t h e r o o m l o o k i n g s te rn a n d just. T h ey t h r e w him t o t h e f lo or b e f o r e t h e c o l o n e l a n d h e raised h imse lf a n d l o o k e d a r o u n d . W h e n h e s aw w h a t wa s affixed t o t h e wall, h e r e t c h e d , s h u d d e r i n g in fear a n d h o r r o r . It was No r dl i n g , of c o u r s e . They ha d b e e n ver y i magi nati ve with him. Since a ny physical d a m a g e t o a m a n w h o ha d r e c e iv e d t h e H e ¡ n ho l tz t r e a t m e n t w as quickly r e pa i re d , t h e y h ad f o u n d a u n i q u e s ol ut io n. Th ey h a d flayed N o r d l i ng alive. They h a d carefully i nci sed t h e flesh of his a r m s a n d t h i gh s a n d a b d o m e n a n d p i n n e d t h e flesh b ac k wi th heavy pins to t h e wall so t h at t h e flesh c o u l d n o t c l o s e with t h e ti s s ue u n d e r n e a t h . N o r d l i n g was p i n n e d like an in s ec t to a d r ying b o a r d , t h e raw t is s ue a n d m u s c u l a t u r e of his b o d y r ed a n d o o zi n g . He lived still a n d w o u l d c o n t i n u e t o live b u t his flesh m u s t b e a b u r n i n g a g ony . " W h y d o n ' t y o u kill h i m ? " Ma lc ol m d e m a n d e d . " N o , " t h e c ol o n e l said. " W e will r e le ase him in d u e c o u r s e a n d h e will h e a l . " " W h y , w h y ? " M a lc o lm said. " B e c a u s e h e ha d i n fo r m a t i o n . He w a s i n c a p a b l e of d e v e l o p ing t h e p r o c e s s for t h e toxi n in t h e a m b e r s . No m o r e t h a n t h e o t h e r s w e h av e c a p t u r e d . W e h a d t o k n o w w h e r e h e l e a r n e d the techniq ue." " D i d t h e o t h e r s tell y o u ? " M a lc o lm c h a l l e n g e d . " N o , " t h e c o lo n e l a d m i t t e d . " T h e y did n o t k n o w e n o u g h , b u t N or dl in g did. He has t ol d us all w e w a n t t o k n o w . " Ma lc ol m s l u m p e d in d e f e a t . Finally h e l o o k e d u p a n d said, "T ak e m e t o t h e D i r e c t o r . " 142
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“ T h e Di re ct or k n o w s y ou a r e h e r e , " t h e c o lo n el said. " H e d o e s n o t wish t o s e e y ou . He has given us his o r d e r s . " M a lc o lm b e g a n t o s o b quietly. "T o t h i n k , " h e said, " t o t h i nk t h a t I c r e a t e d all t h i s . " "I d o n ' t u n d e r s t a n d w h y yo u s h o u l d hav e d e c i d e d to r e n o u n c e y o u r identity, t o h i d e a n d live t h e w ay y o u have done." " D o n ' t y o u s e e t h e h o r r o r ? " M a lc ol m said. " C a n ' t y o u s e e w h y I w o u l d b e a s h a m e d , feel guilty?" " Y o u ? " t h e c o lo n e l said. " H e i n h o l t z ? T h e m a n w h o gave us t h e t r e a t m e n t , o n w h o s e efforts t h e very e x i s t e n c e of t h e C o m p a n y is b a s e d ? " " T h e r e was a t i me w h e n I w a n t e d t h a t r e c o g n i t i o n , " Ma lc o l m said, " a n d I c o u l d n ' t g e t it." " B u t guilt?" t h e c o lo n e l said. "T ha t' s a s t u p i d w o r d . " T h e m o s t te r r ib le in v e n ti o n o f W e s te r n s o c ie ty , M a lc o lm th o u g h t, is g u ilt. N o E asterner u n d e r s ta n d s th e term in th e terrible, p e rso n a l, G o d -re la te d s e n s e th a t a W e ste rn e r d o e s . H e r e m a in e d a fflic te d w ith g u ilt. G u ilt fo r w h a t h e h a d d o n e . G u ilt fo r th e p r id e in w h a t h e had done. For in th e c e n te r o f w o rld d e c a y , th e final d e s tr u c tio n o f all th a t was g o o d a n d k in d a n d g e n tle a n d b e a u tifu l in a w o rld w e b b e d w ith th e c o b w e b s o f n e g le c t, w h a t m a n c a n n o t p e r v e rse ly g lo ry in th e k n o w le d g e th a t h e h a d b r o u g h t th e p r o u d race o f m a n to th is im p a sse ? T he e n d o b je c tiv e o f p o w e r is p o w e r . O rw ell h a d sa id that. T he e n d o b je c tiv e o f d e s tr u c tio n is d e str u c tio n ; th e e n d o b je c tive o f d e c a y is d eca y. It was s o s im p le , s o o b v io u s , s o terribly real. A n d h e h a d b r o u g h t it to p a ss. In n o c e n tly , n a ively, h e h a d b r o u g h t it to p a ss. H e h a d m o v e d a m o n g th e ta tte re d re m n a n ts o f his c u ltu re a n d a p a rt o f h im p e r v e rs e ly g lo rie d in w h a t his e g o h a d w ro u g h t. Su rely, h e th o u g h t, th e y w ill r e m e m b e r th a t I h a v e p a s s e d th is way. O n ly h e r e m a in e d a n d r e m a in e d a n d re m a in e d . H e liv e d a d o z e n lives, w a tc h e d th e s u b tle in tru sio n o f n e w m o re s, n e w 143
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n e e d s in th e c u ltu re th a t b e c a m e fr a g m e n te d b e tw e e n th e n a tu rally a g in g a n d th e a g in g d e a th le s s b e in g s h e h a d crea te d . H e w a tc h e d th e o n e s to o d e b ilita te d to care fo r th e m s e lv e s ta k e n o f f to th e Kraals, w h e r e th e y w e re s u s ta in e d , w a sh e d , u rin a ted , d e fe c a te d , s w a b b e d a n d a llo w e d to live a n d live a n d live. H e w a tc h e d th e s e a n d sa w th e terrib le e c o n o m ic drain o n th e falter in g s o c ie ty . S u rely, it w o u ld b e s im p le r to kill th e m or le t th e m s o m e h o w d ie . O n ly p o w e r h a d b r e d p o w e r a n d th e C o m p a n y was a m in d le s s th in g th a t h a d ta s te d p o w e r a n d th ir s te d for p o w e r a n d w o u ld n o t le t p o w e r g o . T h ere was n o e n d , o n ly th e c o n tin u in g p a tte rn o f d e s p e r a te p e o p le p a y in g fo r life a n d th e C o m p a n y e x istin g , n u rtu rin g , faltering, w a tc h in g th e slo w , in e v ita b le d e c lin e s im p ly b e c a u s e n o o n e h a d th e p o w e r or th e in c lin a tio n to cry " H a lt." In th e e n d h e b e g a n again to m a k e th e to x in . Later h e ta u g h t o th e rs. S o m e o n e h a d to cry " H a lt," h e d e c id e d . O n ly b y this tim e th e cries o f " H a lt" w ere fe e b le a n d h a rd ly e ffe c tiv e . T h ere w as o n ly o n e w a y th a t th e m a c h in e c o u ld run d o w n a n d h e sa w th a t w ith in his life tim e it w o u ld . A fte r that, th e re was little le ft th a t e v e n h e , p e r v e r s e a n d in v o lu te d as h is e m o tio n a l p r o c e s s e s h a d b e c o m e , c o u ld b e p r o u d of. H o w to b e p r o u d o f th e s lo w d e s tr u c tio n o f a culture? H e r e c a l l e d t h e c h a r a c te r in a m i d - t w e n t i e t h - c e n t u r y n o v e l-P ria m Kurz, h e t h o u g h t - w h o in o n e s c e n e b r o k e a rare Han va se, p r o c la im in g th a t th e p o w e r o f th e d e stro y e r was e q u a l to th e p o w e r o f th e creator. A w r e tc h e d , tw is te d n o tio n . O nly, his s e c r e t m in d w h is p e r e d , p e r h a p s it was true. In his o w n u n iq u e w ay h e c o n tin u e d to b e a d e stro y e r. T h o u g h o n e c a n n o t truly b e sa id to b e a d e s tr o y e r w h e n w h a t o n e d e stro y s is d e s tr u c tio n itself. O n ly it w as o v e r n o w . T h e y h a d tw is te d th e last tru th fro m N o rd lin g in his a g o n y a n d . . . " I ' m sorry, M a l c o l m , " N o r d l i ng s o b b e d f r om his wall of pain. "I tried. I h a d t o tell t h e m . " "It d o e s n ' t m a t t e r , ' Ma lc ol m said tiredly. " W h a t will y o u d o now?" 144
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“ T he Di r ec t or has o r d e r e d t h a t w e t a k e yo u t o t h e Kraals," t h e c o l o n e l said. " Ve r y w e l l , " Ma lc ol m said. T h e l i e u t e n a n t h e l p e d him t o his f eet. T h e s e r g e a n t h a n d e d him his c l o t h i n g a n d h e d o n n e d it slowly, painfully. He t u r n e d t o l oo k at Nordl ¡ng. Mercifully, h e h a d f ai nt ed . " T a k e him d o w n f ro m t h e r e , " Ma l c o lm said. " I n d u e t i m e , " t h e c o lo n e l said wi th n o par t icul ar i nt er es t. T h ey left t h e s u b b a s e m e n t , t h e l i e u t e n a n t l e a d i n g t h e way u p t h e d a n k c o n c r e t e c o r r i d o r s t o t h e first floor. Th ey t o o k a s ide e n t r a n c e a n d ski rted t h e plaza. Its b r o a d e x p a n s e was n o w mercifully f re e of t h e w o u n d e d a n d t h e d e a d , b u t t h e dirty black slick f r o m t h e f l ame t h r o w e r s s t a i n e d t h e plaza a n d t h e t u r r e t s with t h e fl ame t h r o w e r s w e r e still m a n n e d . At t h e e d g e of t h e pl aza a single v e h i cl e w a i te d for t h e m . T he s e r g e a n t s t r a d d l e d t h e driver's m o u n t , h a n d o n tiller, a n d t h e l i e u t e n a n t g r a b b e d M a lc ol m by t h e l o o s e cloth of his sleeve. " C o m e o n , old m a n , " t h e l i e u t e n a n t said. " W e ' v e h a d a b o u t e n o u g h of y o u . " M a l c o l m s h i v e r e d . Af te r t hi s o n l y t h e Kraals, t h e e n d l e s s i m p r i s o n m e n t in a coffinlike cell with liquid n u t r i m e n t s p u m p ing f o o d a n d o xy g e n t h r o u g h his d r e a m l e s s b od y . Total d r e a d e d i mm ob il i z a ti on f o r e v e r m o r e w i t h o u t e v e n t h e salve of u n c o n s c i o u s n e s s . He h a d s w o r n this w o u l d n e v e r h a p p e n t o hi m, t h a t t h e single a m b e r h e c ar r ie d wi th him w o u l d give him t h e r e l ea s e f r o m this n i g h t m a r e . If o n l y h e c o u l d g e t to t h e o n e h i d d e n in t h e a p a r t m e n t . It was t h e o nl y way. He w h i r l e d in t h e last s e c o n d with all of t h e e n e r g y h e c o ul d mar shal f r om his a g e d b o d y . His h a n d d a r t e d o u t a n d p ul le d t h e l i e u t e n a n t ' s l a u n c h e r f r o m its ho ls te r. If t h e l i e u t e n a n t ha d n o t b e e n so c ar e le s s h e c o u l d n o t have d o n e it. Mal col m fell b ac k, t h e l a u n c h e r raised. The p roje ct il e b l e w a h o l e in t h e s e r g e a n t ' s c h e s t a n d h e fell o v e r t h e tiller, his b o d y c o n v ul s i n g with t h e n e r v o u s d i s c h a r g e of h eali ng. In t e n m i n u t e s h e w o u l d be whole and . . . T he l i e u t e n a n t fell ba ck, fear d i st o r t i ng his face. Malcolm 145
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fired, a n d in t h e i nstant h e fired, h e s u d d e n l y k n e w wh y t h e l i e u t e n a n t was so afraid. The proj ect il e s h a t t e r e d his b o d y a n d b l o o d s p u r t e d f ro m a d o z e n w o u n d s as t h e m a n di ed . He was n o t a Pol icyhol der , Ma lc olm saw. He ha d killed t h e man a n d he w o u l d n o t rise again. C o n s t a b l e s w e r e yelling a n d r u n n i n g t o w a r d him. He ha d to ge t away. He p u s h e d t h e c o n v ul s i n g b o d y of t h e s e r g e a n t fr om t h e s a d d l e a n d m o u n t e d . A pr oject il e s t r uc k his s h o u l d e r , t h e e x p l o s i o n s h a t t e r i n g it. S o m e h o w h e m a n a g e d to start t h e m o t o r a n d t h r o w it o n a u t o m a t i c as a n o t h e r p ro je cti l e nearly t o r e off his leg. The carrier was r oar ing a cr os s t h e plaza n o w a n d h e a d i n g into a s ide s tr ee t. In t h e last i ns ta nt o n e of t h e f l a m e - t h r o w e r c r e w s m a n a g e d t o g e t its t u r r e t t u r n e d in his d ir ec ti on a n d a g re a t rolling ball of f lame m a r c h e d smok¡ly d o w n t h e s tr ee t. It e n g u l f e d t h e ca rr ie r a n d Ma lc ol m s c r e a m e d in t h e s e ar i n g a g o ny . S o m e h o w , mi ra culous ly, t h e c ar ri er k ept mo v i n g swiftly u p t h e s tr ee t. The c ar ri er ran for several b loc ks b e f o r e it s tr uc k t h e pile of d e br i s w h e r e an a n c i e n t s t o n e - a n d - c o n c r e t e c ur ta in wall had slid fr om t h e face of its p a r e n t bui ldi ng. He was dimly, painfully a wa r e of t h e ca rr ie r t ip p i n g wildly, of his b o d y flying o u t a n d o v e r t h e pile of d eb ri s . He s t r u c k t h e g r o u n d a n d his i m pa c t d i s l o d g e d t h e pile of s t o n e p o i s e d p r e ca r io u sl y o v e r a d e e p t r e n c h . All light f a d e d as h e was b u r i e d u n d e r t h e r u bb le . He lay for h o u r s u n d e r t h e d e b r is , h e a r i n g t h e s o u n d of s h o u t i n g m e n a n d t h e r oar of s e a r c h i n g lorries. S o m e h o w , n o o n e t h o u g h t t o invest igat e t h e pile of r u b b l e . Several c o n st abl es m o u n t e d t h e pile a n d l o o k e d a b o u t b u t n o o n e t h o u g h t t o look u n d e r n e a t h . He lay, b u r n i n g , feel ing t h e a g o n y in his b o d y as it slowly h e a l e d . It h e a l e d s o m u c h m o r e slowly t h a n e ve r b e f o r e b e c a u s e t h e d a m a g e h ad b e e n so w i d e s p r e a d . After d a r k n e s s fell a n d light b e t w e e n t h e i nt er st ices of t h e s t o n e h a d f a d e d , h e k n e w t h a t h e w as well again. He tr ied t o wi ggl e u n d e r t h e d e b r i s a n d h e a r d t h e rattle of brick f r a g m e n t s striking t h e p a v e m e n t . He m u s t ge t b ac k t o Britt. They w o u l d b e s e a r c h i n g for him a n d h e m u s t g e t
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t o t h e a m b e r b e f o r e t h e y f o u n d hi m. He mi g ht e s c a p e with h er , h i d e a n d start a n o t h e r s y nt h e t i c e x i s t e n c e , b u t h e was t o o ti red. He w o u l d r a t h e r e s c a p e by t h e o nl y s u r e p a t h available t o him. H e tried again a n d h e a r d t h e sliding s o u n d of d e b ri s . S u d d e n l y an ar m wa s f r ee a n d painfully h e f o u n d p u r c h a s e a n d p ul le d his t o r s o fr ee. N o w h e c o u l d m o v e bricks a n d s t o n e a n d m o r t a r f r a g m e n t s wi th his hor r ibl y s c a r r e d h a n d s . It t o o k him a n o t h e r fifteen m i n u t e s of p a n t i n g e ff or t t o f r e e his legs, t h e right a n d t h e hor r ibl y t w is te d left. C h a r r e d c l o t h i n g fell a wa y f r o m his b o d y as h e m o v e d . He s t u m b l e d d o w n t h e alley. T he flesh of his face w a s p u c k e r e d a n d scales of d e a d skin fell a wa y as h e w i p e d his h a n d s ac ro s s his e ye s. S o m e h o w h e ident if ied t h e i n t e r s e ct io n l e adi ng t o t h e a p a r t m e n t a n d t u r n e d , falling b a c k a ga ins t a wall as a patrol of t w o c o n s t a b l e s p a s s e d . H e m o v e d painfully t o w a r d t h e alleyway a n d s t o o d finally b e f o r e his d o o r , pr a yi ng t h a t Britt was n o t h o m e . He d i d n ' t w a n t h e r t o s e e him this way. He k e y e d t h e d o o r a n d s t e p p e d o v e r t h e sill, p u s h i n g t h e heavy d r a p e s as id e. T h e n h e l e a n e d b a c k a ga ins t t h e wall a n d s i g he d . S h e w a s n ' t t h e r e . He s t u m b l e d ac r os s t h e r o o m a n d p a w e d t h r o u g h t h e c l o t h i n g in t h e b o t t o m d r a w e r of his b u r e a u . T h e small plastic b o x with its si ngle a m b e r c a p s u l e w a s t h e r e w h e r e he h a d left it, t u c k e d d e e p into t h e sl e ev e of a shirt. He w h i r l e d as t h e d o o r o p e n e d b e h i n d hi m. She c a m e in as h e feverishl y p r i ed o p e n t h e box a n d p i c ke d at t h e c a p s u l e in its b e d of c o t t o n . His f ingers w e r e p u c k e r i n g wi th n e w scar t is s ue a n d in his c l u m s i n e s s h e d r o p p e d t h e c a p s ul e . It fell t o t h e c a r p e t as Britt p u s h e d t h r o u g h t h e ca nva s c ur t a i ns a n d s a w him. “ O h , Ma i, " s h e c ri ed a n d ran a c r o ss t h e r o o m to him. He was s t r ug gl i ng with his h a n d b u t t h e m u s c l e s w o u l d n o t o b e y . Finally h e m a n a g e d t o pick u p t h e c a p s u l e with his o t h e r h a nd . " N o , d o n ' t , " s h e y e ll ed, a n d b e f o r e h e c o u l d m o v e , s h e was b e s i d e him, pryi ng o p e n his fingers. T he c a p s u l e d r o p p e d 147
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into h e r small h a n d . " N o , n o t t ha t w a y , " s h e c ri e d. "I k n o w w h a t h a p p e n e d . W e ca n g e t away, b u y n e w p a p e r s . They'll n e v e r find y o u . " Sh e r o s e a n d ran a cr os s t h e r o o m t o t h e c u r t a i n e d c o m m o d e . Before h e c o u l d s t o p h e r t h e a m b e r d i s a p p e a r e d in a vortex of wa t e r . Sh e w as b a c k b e s i d e him n o w , h e r h a n d s c a r e s si n g his b o d y , pulling his r e m a i n i n g c l o t hi ng f r o m him. "I love y o u , " s h e s o b b e d . "I love y o u . " She p u l l e d him t o t h e b e d , h e e d l e s s o f t h e litter of c o s t u m e s s p r a w l e d a c r o s s it. S he w a s in his a r ms , kissing his b o d y , c a r e s s ing him. His eyes saw t h e g a u z e a n d t h e s e a t h i ng s littering t h e b e d a n d t h e m o n s t r o u s s e a - c r e a t u r e m a sk at o n e c o r n e r . T h e y w e r e m a k i n g l o v e t h e n as his i n n e r v o i c e i n s a n e l y c h a n t e d t h e lines f r o m Prufrock: W e h a v e l i n g e r e d in t h e c h a m b e r s o f t h e s e a By s e a - g irls w r e a t h e d w i t h s e a w e e d r e d a n d b r o w n Till h u m a n v o i c e s w a k e us a n d w e d r o w n .
The o nl y h u m a n v o ic e in t h e r o o m was h e rs, m u t t e r i n g with b u i l di n g p as si o n a s s h e k issed his s h a t t e r e d limbs, his h i d e o u s l y s c a r r e d face, t h e t e r r ib l e w a r p e d s u b s t a n c e t h a t w as his flesh. " Y o u ' r e so b e a u t i f u l , " s h e s o b b e d . " O h , Mai, Mai, y o u ' r e s o very, very b e au t i f u l . " And in t h e t h r o e s of s a d n e s s a n d lust, he w e p t a n d k e p t o n w e e p i n g t h r o u g h o u t it all.
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D eath of a C ity FRANK HERBERT
It w a s s u c h a beaut iful city, Bjska t h o u g h t . An o b s e r v e r ' s eyes c o u l d n o t avoid t h e o v e r w h e l m i n g be aut y. As t h e City D o c t o r called t o t r e a t t h e city, Bjska f o u n d t h e b e a u t y h e a r t b r e a k i n g . He f o u n d his t h o u g h t s d r a w n again a n d agai n to t h e individuals w h o called this place h o m e , tw o h u n d r e d a n d f o r ty - o n e t h o u s a n d h u m a n s w h o n o w f ac ed t h e p r o s p e c t of h o m e l e s s lives. Bjska s t a r e d a cr os s o p e n w a t e r at t h e city f r o m t h e w o o d e d p e n i n s u l a t h a t p r o t e c t e d t h e i n n e r h a r b o r . T h e low light of late a f t e r n o o n cast a r u d d y g lo w o n t h e s c e n e . His e y e s p r o b e d for flaws, b u t f ro m this d i s t a n c e n o t e v e n t h e t astefully a p p l i e d patches could be seen. W h y was I c h o s e n fo r this? h e a s k e d himself. T h e n : If th e d a m n fo o ls h a d o n ly b u ilt an u g ly city! I m m e di a t e l y , h e r e j e c t e d this t h o u g h t . It m a d e as m u c h s e n s e as t o a sk w h y Mieri, t h e i n te rn w h o s t o o d n e a r t h e o r n ¡ t h o p t e r b e h i n d hi m, p e r s o n i f i e d s u c h f e m i n i n e b e au t y . Su ch t h i ng s h a p p e n e d . It w a s t h e t as k of a City D o c t o r t o r e c o g n i z e i n e s c a p a bl e facts a n d p u t t h e m in t h e i r p r o p e r c o nt e x t . Bjska c o n t i n u e d t o s t u d y t h e city, striving for t h e o b j e c t iv e /s ub je cti ve s yn th e si s t h a t his calling d e m a n d e d . T h e city's b u i l d e r s h a d gr af t e d t h e i r ideas o n t o t h e hills b e l o w t h e m o u n tains with s u c h a p r o f o u n d e m o t i o n a l s e n s e of h a r m o n y t h a t n o trick of t h e e y e c o u l d reject t h e i r c r ea t io n . Against a b a c k d r o p of s n o w p e a k s a n d f or est s, t h e b u i ld e rs h a d rightly said: “ T h e vertical t h r e a t e n s a m a n ; it p u t s d a n g e r a b o v e him. A 149
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m a n c a n n o t relax a n d a c h i e ve h u m a n b a l a n c e in a vertical s e t ting." Th u s, t h e y h a d built a city w h o s e very rig h tn e ss m i g h t c o n d e m n it. Had t h e y e v e n s u s p e c t e d w h a t t h e y h ad c r e a t e d ? Bjska t h o u g h t it unlikely. H o w c o u ld th e b u ild e rs h a v e m is s e d it? h e a s k e d himself. Even as t h e q u e s t i o n a p p e a r e d in his m i n d , h e p u t it d o w n . It s e r v e d n o p u r p o s e for him t o cry o u t a ga in st t h e c i r c u m s t a n c e s t h a t said h e m u s t m a k e this d e c i s i o n . T h e City D o c t o r wa s h e r e o n b e h a l f of t h e s p e c i e s , a r e p r e s e n t a t i v e of all h u m a n s t o g e t h e r . H e m u s t act for th e m . The city p r e s e n t e d an a p p e a r a n c e of a w e s o m e solidity t ha t Bjska k n e w to b e false. It c o u l d b e d e s t r o y e d q u i t e easily. He h a d b u t t o give t h e o r d e r , certifying his d e c i si on with his official seal. P e o p l e w o u l d rage a ga in st fate, b u t t h e y w o u l d o b e y . Families w o u l d b e b r o k e n a n d s c a t t e r e d . T he n a m e of this place w o u l d b e e r a s e d f ro m all b u t t h e City D o c t o r s ' r e c o r d s . T he natural l a n d s c a p e w o u l d b e r e s t o r e d a n d t h e r e w o u l d r e ma in n o visible sign t h a t a city s u c h as this o n e h a d s t o o d h er e . In t i me , o nl y t h e b u i l d e r s of cities w o u l d r e m e m b e r this place, a n d t h at as a w a r n i n g . B e hi nd hi m, Mieri c l e a r e d h e r t h r o a t . S h e w o u l d s p e a k o u t s o o n , Bjska r eali zed. Sh e h a d b e e n pa t ie n t, b u t t h e y w e r e pas t t h e b o u n d a r i e s of p a t i e n c e . He r es is te d an i m p u l s e t o t ur n a n d feast his e ye s u p o n h e r b e a u t y as a c h a n g e f r o m t h e citys c a p e. That was t h e p r o b l e m : T h e r e w o u l d b e so little c h a n g e in t r a d i n g o n e p r o s p e c t o f b e a u t y f or a n o t h e r . Wh il e Mieri f i d ge t e d , h e c o n t i n u e d t o delay. Wa s t h e r e n o alt ernative? Mieri h a d left h e r o w n p l e a di n gs u n v o i c e d , b ut Bjska h a d h e a r d t h e m in e ve r y w o r d s h e u t t e r e d . This was Mier¡'s o w n city. S h e h a d b e e n b o r n h e r e — b e a u t y b o r n in b e au t y. W h e r e was t h e me di ca l p o in t o f e n try in this city? Bjska a l l o we d his fr ust ra ti on t o e s c a p e in a sigh. The city played its h or i zo nt a l lines a cr os s t h e hills with an a r c h i t e c t u r e t ha t o p e n e d o u t w a r d , t h a t e x p a n d e d , t ha t c o n d e m n e d n o h u m a n wit hi n its limits t o a c o n t a i n e r i z e d e xi st e nc e . The c h o i c e of w h e r e ever y e l e m e n t s h o u l d s t a n d h a d b e e n 150
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m a d e with mast er ful a w a r e n e s s of t h e h u m a n p s y c he . W h e r e t h i ng s t ha t g r e w w i t h o u t m a n ' s i n t e r f e r e n c e s h o u l d g r o w , t h e r e th ey w ere. W h e r e struc ture s w o u ld amplify existing forms, t h e r e s t o o d t h e r e q u i r e d s t r u c t u r e s . . . precisely! Every e x p e c tat io n of t h e h u m a n s e n s e s h a d b e e n me t. A n d it was in this very c o n f o r m i t y t o h u m a n d e m a n d s t h a t t h e c a n c e r o u s flaw a r o s e. Bjska s h o o k his h e a d sadly. If c o n fo r m ity w e re th e d e fin itio n o f artistic survival . . . As h e h a d a nt i c i p a t e d , M¡eri m o v e d c l o s e r b e h i n d him, said, “ S o m e t i m e s w h e n I s e e it f r o m o u t h e r e I t h i n k my city is t o o beauti ful. W o r d s c h o k e in my t h r o a t . I l ong for w o r d s t o d e s c r i b e it a n d t h e r e a r e n o n e . " H er voi ce r a n g with musical s o f t n e s s in t h e q u i e t e v e n i n g air. Bjska t h o u g h t : M y city! S h e h a d said it a n d n o t h e a r d h er self saying it. A City D o c t o r c o u l d have n o city. He said, " M a n y h av e t r i e d a n d failed. Even p h o t o g r a p h s fall s h o r t of t h e reality. A s u p r e m e h o l o p a ¡ n t artist mi ght c a p t u r e it, b u t o nl y for a fl ee ti ng m o m e n t . " “ I wi sh e v er y h u m a n in t h e u n i v e r s e c o u l d s e e my city," M¡eri said. "I d o n o t s h a r e t h a t w i s h , " Bjska said. An d h e w o n d e r e d if this bald s t a t e m e n t w as e n o u g h t o s h o c k h e r into t h e r e q u i r e d st ate of a w a r e n e s s . S h e w a n t e d t o b e a City D o c t or ? Let h e r s t r e t ch into t h e i n n e r w o r l d as well as t h e o u t e r . He s e n s e d h e r w e i g h i n g his w o r d s . Beauty c o u l d play s u c h a vitalizing role in h u m a n life t h a t t h e intellect t e n d e d t o o v e r look its devitalizing possibilities. If b e a u t y c o u l d n o t b e i g n o r e d , was t h a t n o t indi sc re et ? T h e fault wa s blatancy. T h e r e was s o m e t h i n g d e m a n d i n g l y i m m o d e s t a b o u t t h e way this city g il de d its hills, a d d i n g d i m e n s i o n t o t h e p e a ks b e h i n d it. O n e saw t h e city a n d did n o t s e e it. M¡eri k n e w this! Bjska t ol d himself. She k n e w it as s h e k n e w t ha t Bjska lo ve d her . W h y n ot? M o s t m e n w h o s a w h e r loved h e r a n d d e s i r e d her . W h y h a d s h e n o lovers t h e n ? And wh y h a d h e r city n o i mmi gr a nt s ? Had s h e e ve r p u t b o t h of t h e s e q u e s t i o n s t o hersel f, s e t t in g t h e m in t e n s i o n a g ai n s t e a c h o t h e r ? 151
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It was t h e sor t of t h i n g a City D o c t o r m u s t d o . T h e s pe c ie s k n e w t h e s o u r c e of its c r eati ve e n er g y . T h e S e c o n d Law m a d e t h e s o u r c e plain. He s aid, "Mier¡, w h y d o e s a City D o c t o r have s u c h a w e s o m e p o w e r s ? I ca n have t h e m e m o r i e s of w h o l e p o p u l a t i o n s o b l i t e r a t e d , selectively e r a s e d , o r h a v e individuals t h u s t r e a t e d . I can e v e n c a u s e d e a t h . You a s p i r e t o s u c h p o w e r s . W h y d o w e have t h e m ? ” S h e said, "To m a k e s u r e t h a t t h e s p e c i e s faces u p t o Infinity.” He s h o o k his h e a d sadly. A r ot e a n s w e r ! S h e gave him a r o te a n s w e r w h e n h e d e m a n d e d p e r s o n a l insight! T he a w a r e n e s s t h a t h a d m a d e Bjska a City D o c t o r p e r v a d e d him. K n o w l e d g e o u t of his m o s t a n c i e n t past t old him t h e b u i l d e rs of this city h a d s u c c e e d e d t o o well. Call it c h a n c e or fate. It w a s akin t o t h e g e n e t i c m o m e n t t ha t ha d p r o d u c e d M¡eri's c o m p e l l i n g b e a u t y — t h e r e d -g o l d hair, t h e g r e e n eyes, t h e f e m a l e p r o p o r t i o n s a p p l i e d with s u c h e x a c t i t u d e t h a t a male m i gh t f east his s e n s e s , b u t n e v e r invest his flesh. T h e r e ex is te d a creati ve p e a k t h a t a l a r m e d t h e flesh. Bjska s t o o d s e c u r e l y in his o w n stolid, r o u n d - f a c e d u gl iness, k n o w i n g this t hi ng . Mieri m u s t find t h a t i n n e r w a r m t h t h a t s p o k e with c he mi ca l i n s i st e nc e of latent w r i n k l es a n d a gi ng. W h a t w o u l d Mieri d o if h e r city d i e d b e f o r e its time? If s h e w as e v e r t o b e a City D oc t o r , s h e m u s t b e m a d e t o u n d e r s t a n d this l es so n o f t h e flesh a n d t h e spirit. He said, " D o y ou im a g in e t h e r e ' s a city m o r e beaut iful in the entire world?” She t h o u g h t s h e h e a r d b a n t e r i n g in his vo ic e a n d w o n d e r e d : Is h e te a s in g ? It w a s a s h o c k i n g t h o u g h t . City D o c t or s m i g h t j o k e t o k e e p t h e i r o w n sanity in b a l a n c e , b u t at s u c h a t i me as this . . . with s o m u c h at s t a k e . . . " T h e r e m u s t b e a city m o r e beaut if ul s o m e w h e r e , " s h e said. "Where?" S he t o o k a d e e p b r e a t h t o p u t d o w n p r o f o u n d d i sq u ie t . "Ar e y o u m a k i n g fun of my city?” s h e d e m a n d e d . " H o w c an you? It's a sick city a n d y o u k n o w it !" S h e felt h e r lips q u i ve r , m o i s t u r e at t h e c o r n e r s of h e r eyes. S he e x p e r i e n c e d b o t h fear a n d 152
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s h a m e . She loved h e r city, b u t it was sick. T he o u t b r e a k s of v an d a l i sm , t h e lack of creativity h e r e , t h e d e p a r t u r e of t h e b e s t p e o p l e , t h e bl ind v i o l e n c e f r o m r a n d o m e l e m e n t s of its ci tizenr y w h e n t h e y m o v e d t o o t h e r s et tings . All ha d b e e n t r a c e d b a ck h e r e . The si c kn es s h a d its f o cu s in h e r city. T ha t was w h y a City D o c t o r h ad c o m e . S he h a d w o r k e d ha r d t o have t h a t d o c t o r b e Bjska, h e r old t e a c h e r , a n d m o r e t h a n t h e h o n o r of w o r k i n g with him o n c e m o r e ha d b e e n i nvol ved. S h e ha d felt a p e r s o n a l n e e d . " I ' m s o r r y, " Bjska said. "This is t h e city w h e r e y o u w e r e b o r n a n d I u n d e r s t a n d y o u r c o n c e r n . I a m t h e t e a c h e r n ow. I wish t o s h a r e my t h o u g h t p r o c e s s e s with y o u . W h a t is it w e m u s t d o m o s t carefully as w e d i a g n o s e ? " S h e l o o k e d a c r o s s t h e w a t e r at t h e city, f ee li ng t h e c o o l n e s s of o n r u s h ¡ n g nightfall, s e e i n g t h e lights b e g i n t o w i nk o n , t h e s o f t n e s s of low s t r u c t u r e s a n d b l e n d e d g r e e n e r y , t h e pastel c o l or s a n d h a r m o n y . H e r s e n s e s d e m a n d e d m o r e t h a n this, h o w e v e r . You did n o t d i a g n o s e a city just by its a p p e a r a n c e . W h y h a d Bjska b r o u g h t h e r h e re ? T h e c o n d i t i o n of a city's i n h a b i t a n t s r e p r e s e n t e d a m a j o r c o n c e r n . T r a ns i e n t individuals, always t e n a n t s o n t h e land, w e r e t h e single m o v i n g cells. On ly t h e s p e c i e s o w n e d land, o w n e d cities. A City D o c t o r w as h i re d by t h e s pe c ie s . In effect, h e d i a g n o s e d t h e s p e c i e s. They told him t h e i mp r in t o f t h e set ti ng. It ha d b e e n a gigantic s t e p t o w a r d Infinity w h e n t h e s p e c i e s ha d r e c o g n i z e d t h a t s et tings m i g h t c o n t r i b u t e t o its illnesses. " A r e y o u d i a g n o s i n g m e t o d i a g n o s e t h e city?" s h e a s ke d. "I d i a g n o s e my o w n r e a c t i o n s , " h e said. "I find myself loving y o u r city wi th a fierce p r o t e c t i v e n e s s t h a t at t h e s a m e t i m e r ep el s m e a n d insists t h a t I scar this place. Having s e e n this city, I will try to find p i e c es of it in ev er y o t h e r city, b u t I will n o t k n o w w h a t I s e e k b e c a u s e I h av e n o t really e x p e r i e n c e d this city. Every o t h e r city will b e f o u n d w a n t i n g a n d I will n o t k n o w w h a t it w a n t s . " Mieri felt s u d d e n l y t h r e a t e n e d a n d w o n d e r e d : W hat is h e tryin g to te ll m e ? T h e r e was t h r e a t in Bjska's w o r d s . It was as t h o u g h h e h a d b e e n t r a n s f o r m e d a b r u p t l y into a dirty old
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m a n w h o d e m a n d e d o b s c e n e t h i ng s of h e r , w h o a f f r o n t e d her. He w a s d a n g e r o u s ! He r city was t o o g o o d for him! He was a s q u a r e , ugly little m a n w h o o f f e n d e d h e r city w h e n e v e r he e n t e r e d it. Even as t h e s e r e ac ti on s p u l s e d t h r o u g h h e r a w a r e n e s s , s h e s e n s e d h e r t raining t a k i ng its d o m i n a n t place. She h a d b e e n e d u c a t e d t o b e c o m e a City D o c to r . The s p e c i e s relied o n her. H u m a n s h ad given h e r a matrix by w h i c h t o k e e p t h e m o n t h e tr ack t h r o u g h Infinity. "This is t h e m o s t beaut i f ul city m a n has e v e r c o n c e i v e d , " s h e w h i s p e r e d , a n d s h e felt t h e betrayal in ev er y w o r d c o m i n g f r o m h e r lips. Surely t h e r e w e r e m o r e beaut if ul places in th ei r wor l d? Surely t h e r e w e r e ! "If it w e r e o nl y t h a t , " Bjska said. "If it w e r e o n ly t h e c o n c e p t ion of b e a u t y in itself." Sh e n o d d e d t o herself, t h e a w a r e n e s s u n f ol di n g. T h e S e c o n d Law told h u m a n s t h a t a b s o l u t e s w e r e lethal. T h e y p r o v i d e d n o p ot e nt ia l , n o d iffe r e n c e s in te n s io n t h a t t h e s p e c i e s c o u l d e m p l o y as e n e r g y s o u r c e s . C h a n g e a n d g r o w t h r e p r e s e n t e d n e c es si t i e s for t h i n g s t h at lived. A s pe c i e s lived. H u m a n s d a r e d c o n c e i v e of b e a u t y o nl y in t h e p r e s e n c e of c h a n g e . H u m a n s p r e v e n t e d war s, b u t n o t a b s o lu te ly . H u m a n s d e f i n e d c ri me s a n d j u d g m e n t s , b u t o n l y in t h a t fluid c o n t e x t of c h a n g e . "I love t h e city," s h e said. No l o n g e r m y city, Bjska t h o u g h t . G o o d . He said, "It's right to love t h e pl ace w h e r e y o u w e r e b o r n . That 's t h e way it is with h u m a n s . I love a little c o m m u n i t y o n a m u d d y river, a pl ace called Eeltown. S o m e t i m e s w h e n t h e filters a r e n ' t w o r k i n g p r op e rl y, it smells of p u l p w o o d a n d t h e d i g e st e r s. The river is m u d d y b e c a u s e w e farm its w a t e r s h e d for t r ee s . R e c a pt u r i n g all of t h a t m u d d y silt a n d r e p l a ci n g it o n t h e hill t e r r a c e s is ha r d w o r k a n d costl y in h u m a n e n e r g y , b u t it gives h u m a n b e i n g s pla ce s w h e r e t h e y fit into t h e o r d e r t h a t w e s h a r e with t h e r es t of o u r w o r l d . W e h a ve p o i n t s o f ent ry. W e h av e t h in gs w e can c h a n g e . S o m e d a y , we'll e v en c h a n g e t h e w ay w e e x c h a n g e t h e silt e n e r g y . T h e r e ' s a n e s s e n t i a l r e l a t i o n s h i p 154
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b e t w e e n c h a n g e a n d e x c h a n g e th a t w e h a v e l e a r n e d to appreciate and use.” Mieri felt like crying. S h e h a d s p e n t fifteen ye a rs in t h e singlem i n d e d p u r su it of h e r p r o f e s s i o n a n d all for w h a t p u r p o s e ? S he said, " O t h e r cities have b e e n c u r e d of w o r s e t h a n t hi s. " Bjska s ta r ed me di ta t ive l y at t h e d a r k e n i n g city. T h e s u n ha d m o v e d o n t o t h e h o r i z o n wh il e h e a n d Mieri t al ked. N o w, its light p a i n t e d o r a n g e s t r e a m e r s o n t h e c l o u d s in t h e w e st . T h e r e w o u l d b e g o o d w e a t h e r o n t h e m o r r o w , p r o v i d e d t h e o ld m a r i n e r s ' saying was c o r r ec t . T h e city h a d b e c o m e a m a z e of lights in a bowl of d a r k n e s s , with t h e s n o w p e a ks b e h i n d it ref lect ing t h e s u n s e t . Even in this tr an si t i on m o m e n t , t h e pl ace b l e n d e d with its e n v i r o n m e n t in s u c h a way t h a t t h e h u m a n r esi st ed a ny d i s t u r b a n c e , e v e n wit h his o w n w o r d s . Silence c h o k e d h i m— d a n g e r o u s si lence. Mier¡ felt a b r e a k i n g t e n s i o n wit hi n h e r , a p r o d u c t of he r t r a in i ng a n d n o t of h e r city. T he city h a d b e e n h e r fl esh, b ut was n o l on ge r. " H u m a n s have always b e e n r estless a n i m a l s , " Bjska said. "A g o o d t h i n g , t o o . W e b o t h k n o w w h a t ' s w r o n g h e r e. T h e r e ' s s u c h a t h i n g as t o o m u c h c o m f o r t , t o o m u c h b e a u t y . Life r e q u i r e s t h e c o n t i n u i n g str ug gl e . That may b e t h e o nl y basic law in t h e living u n i v e r s e . " Again, s h e s e n s e d p e r s o n a l t h r e a t in his w o r d s . Bjska had b e c o m e a d a r k s h a d o w a g a i n s t t h e cit y's l i ght s . T o o m u c h b e a u ty ! T hat s p o k e of t h e c o n t e x t in w h i c h t h e b e a u t y e xis ted, a ga inst w h i c h t h e b e a u t y s t o o d o u t . It w as n o t t h e b e a u t y itself, b u t t h e lack of t e n s i o n s in this c o n t e x t . S he said, " D o n ' t offer m e a ny false h o p e s . " "I o f f er y ou n o h o p e s at all," h e said. "T ha t' s n o t t h e f u n c ti on of a City D oc t or . W e just m a k e s u r e t h e g e n e r a t i v e t e n s i o n s c o n t i n u e . If t h e r e ar e walls, w e b r e a k t h e m d o w n . But walls h a p p e n . To try t o p r e v e n t t h e m c an lead us i nto a b s o l u t e s . H o w l o n g h av e o u t s i d e r s l e a r n e d t o love y o u r city onl y to h a t e it?" S h e t r i ed t o swa ll ow in a t h r o a t s u d d e n l y dry. " H o w l o n g ? " h e insisted. 155
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She f o r c e d he rs e lf t o a n s we r . "At first, w h e n I s a w hate, I a s k e d w h y, b u t p e o p l e d e n i e d it." "O f course they did!" "I d o u b t e d my o w n s e n s e s at t i m e s , " s h e said. " T h e n I n o t e d t h a t t h e m o s t t a l e n t e d a m o n g us m o v e d away. Always, it was for g o o d r e a s o n s . It was so n o t i c e a b l e , t h o u g h , t ha t o u r Counci l C h a i r m a n said it was c a u s e f or c e l e b r a t i o n w h e n I r e t u r n e d h e r e for my i nt e rn s hi p. I h a d n ' t t h e h e a rt t o tell him it w a s n ' t my d o i n g , t ha t y o u ha d s e n t m e . " " H o w d id t h e y r eact w h e n y ou t o l d t h e m I w as c o m i n g ? " Sh e c l e a r e d h e r t h r o at . " Yo u u n d e r s t a n d I h a d m a d e s o m e s u g g e s t i o n s for a d j u s t m e n t s wit hin t h e city, c h a n g e s in flow patterns and such." " W h i c h w e r e n o t t a k e n s e r i o u s l y , " he said. " N o . T h e y w o n d e r at my d i s c o n t e n t . " S h e s t a r e d a c r o ss at t h e lights. It was full d a r k n o w . Night bi r ds h u m m e d after insects a b o v e t h e m . " T h e h at e has b e e n g o i n g o n f o r m a n y years. I k n o w t h a t 's w h y y o u s e n t m e h e r e . " " W e n e e d all of t h e City D o c t o r s w e c an g e n e r a t e , " h e said. "W e need you." S he r e c o g n i z e d t h e " w e " in his s t a t e m e n t wi th m o u n t i n g t e r ro r . That wa s t h e s p e c i e s tal king t h r o u g h a City D o c t o r w h o s e p o w e r s h a d b e e n t e m p e r e d in a ct ion. T h e individual c o u l d b e t r a n s f o r m e d o r s h a t t e r e d by t h a t " w e . " " T h e C o u n c i l m e n onl y w a n t e d t o b e c o m f o r t e d , " s h e p r o t e s t e d , b u t a voice wit hin h e r p l e a d e d : C o m fo r t m e , c o m fo r t m e , c o m f o r t m e . Sh e k n e w Bjska h e a r d t h a t o t h e r voice. " H o w naive of t h e m , " h e said, " t o w a n t t o b e t ol d t h a t t r u t h is u n t r u t h , t h at w h a t t h e s e n s e s r e p o r t m u s t n o t b e b e l i e v e d . " He in h al e d a d e e p b r e a t h . " Tr u t h c h a n g e s s o rapidly t h a t it's d a n g e r o u s t o look o nl y in o n e d ir e ct io n . This is an infinite universe." Mier¡ h e a r d h e r t e e t h c h a t t e r i n g , t ri ed t o still t h e m . Fear d r o v e h e r n o w a n d n ot t h e s u d d e n cold of nightfall. S he felt a t r e m b l i n g all t h r o u g h h e r b od y . S o m e t h i n g Bjska h a d o n c e said c a m e b ac k t o h e r n o w : "It requires a certain k i n d o f a b a n 156
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d o n e d c o urag e e v e n to w a n t to b e a City D o c to r ." D o I h a v e tha t courage? s h e a s k e d hersel f. H u m a n ity h e lp m e ! Will I fail n o w ? Bjska, t u r n i n g t o face h e r in t h e d a r k n e s s , d e t e c t e d a faint o d o r of b u r ni ng . S o m e o n e f ro m t h e city h a d a f o r b i d d e n fire s o m e w h e r e a l o n g t h e b e a c h e s . T he t e n s i o n of p r o t e s t r o d e o n t h a t o d o r a n d h e w o n d e r e d if t ha t t e n s i o n c ar r ie d t h e kind of h o p e t h a t c o u l d b e c o n v e r t e d into life. Mieri n o l o n g e r was visible in t h e d a r k n e s s . Night c o v e r e d t h e p e r f e c t i o n of h e r b e a u t y a n d t h e c l o t h i n g t h a t was like a r m o r in its s u b t l e h a r m o n i z i n g with h e r flesh. C o u l d s h e ask h o w r a t h e r t h a n w hy? W o u l d s h e m a k e t h e r e q u i r e d transi ti on? H e w a i t e d , t e n s e a n d listening. “ S o m e of t h e m will always h a t e , " s h e w h i s p e r e d . S h e k n o w s , h e t h o u g h t . He said, “ T h e s i c k ne s s of a city r e a c h e s far b e y o n d its b o u n d a r i e s . " Mieri c l e n c h e d h e r fists, t r e m b l i n g . “ T he arm is n o t s ic k w it h o u t t h e b o d y b e i n g s i c k . " Bjska h a d said t h a t o n c e . An d: "A sin g le h u m a n u n l o v e d can s e t th e u n iv e rse a fire ." “ Life is in t h e b u s i n e s s of c o n s t r u c t i n g d i c h o t o m i e s , " s h e t o l d hersel f. " A n d all d i c h o t o m i e s lead t o c o n t r a d i c t i o n s . Logic t ha t is s o u n d for a finite s ys t em is n o t ne ce ssa ri ly s o u n d for an infinite s y s t e m . " T he w o r d s fr om t h e City D o c t o r s ' c r e e d r e s t o r e d a m e a s u r e of h e r calm. S h e said, "It'll t a k e m o r e t h a n a f e w a d j u s t m e n t s . " "It's like a backf ir e with w h i c h o u r a n c e s t o r s s t o p p e d a r u n a wa y grass f ir e, " h e said. " Y ou give t h e m a b a d c as e of d i s c o n t e n t . N o c o m f o r t w h a t s o e v e r e x c e p t t h at y o u love t h e h u m a n in e a c h of t h e m . S o m e c o n t r a d i c t i o n s d o l ead t o u g l i n e s s . " He h e a r d h e r m ov i n g in t h e d a r k n e s s . Cl ot h r i p p e d . Again. He w o n d e r e d : W h ic h o f t h e in fin ite alternatives has s h e c h o s e n ? W o u l d s h e s car t h e brittle a r m o r o f h e r beauty? "I will b e g in by r e lo ca t in g t h e m o s t c o n t e n t e d half of t h e city's p o p u l a t i o n , " s h e said. I will . . . h e t h o u g h t . It was always t h u s t h e City D o c t o r b e g a n his c r e at io n . 157
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“ T h e r e ' s n o profit in a d j u st i n g t h e i r m e m o r i e s , ” s h e said. “ T h e y ' r e m o r e v a lu a b l e just as t h e y are. Their p r e s e n t c o n t e n t will b e t h e m e a s u r e of t h e i r f u t u r e e n e r g i e s . ” Again, h e h e a r d h e r c l ot hi ng rip. W h a t wa s s h e d oi ng? Sh e said, “ I will, of c o u r s e , m o v e in with y o u d u r i n g this p e r i o d a n d p r e s e n t at least t h e a p p e a r a n c e of b e i n g y o u r mis t ress. T h e y will h at e t h a t . " He s e n s e d t h e e n e r g y s h e ha d r e q u i r e d t o o v e r c o m e p e r s o n a l b ar ri er s a n d h e willed hi mse lf t o r e m ai n silent. S h e m u s t win this o n h e r o w n , d e c i d e o n h e r o w n . "If y o u love m e , it will b e m o r e t h a n a p p e a r a n c e , " s h e said. " W e h av e n o g u a r a n t e e t h a t w e will c r e a t e o nl y b e a u t y , b u t if w e c r e a t e with love a n d if o u r c r e a ti on g e n e r a t e s n e w life, t h e n w e can love . . . a n d w e will g o o n living.” He felt t h e w a r m t h of h e r b r e a t h o n his face. She h a d m o v e d c l o s e r w i t h o u t his h e a r i n g ! H e w i l l e d h i m s e l f t o r e m a i n i mm o b i l e . "If t h e p e o p l e of t h e city m u s t h a te , a n d s o m e of t h e m always will," s h e said, " b e t t e r t h e y h at e us t h a n o n e a n o t h e r . " He felt a b a r e ar m g o a r o u n d his n e ck ; h e r lips f o u n d his c h e e k . "I will save o u r city," s h e said, " a n d I d o n ' t b eli eve you will h at e m e for it." Bjska r el axed, e n f o l d e d h e r u n a r m o r e d flesh in his ar ms. He said, " W e b e g in with u n q u e s t i o n i n g love for e a c h o t h e r . That is a very g o o d p r e s c r i p t i o n , D o c t o r , my love, as l on g as t h e r e r e m a i n s sufficient e n e r g y t o s u p p o r t t h e n ex t g e n e r a t i o n . Beauty b e d a m n e d ! Life r e q u i r e s a p o i n t of e n t r y . "
158
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Assassins of Air GEORGE ZEBROWSKI
G l o o m c o n c e a l e d t h e city, an o b s c u ri t y b o r n of dying ni ght a n d p o l l ut a n t s h a n g i n g m o t i o n l e s s in t h e air, a mass ive s h a d o w y stillness p r e s s i n g d o w n o n t h e p a v e m e n t , billions of particles r ea d y t o swirl t h r o u g h t h e s t o n e alleys with t h e m o r n i n g w in d . Pr a eg e r s q u a t t e d by t h e iron f e n c e in t h e alleyway, wai ti ng for U r u b a a n d Blue C h i p t o c o m e back. He l o o k e d at his wa t ch a n d s a w it wa s o n e h o u r t o d a w n , a n d h e w o u l d h av e t o leave if t h e y d i d n ' t r e t u r n b e f o r e t h e n . S u d d e n l y h e h e a r d t h e m c r e e p into t h e alley. They k n e w w h e r e h e was a n d c a m e t o s q u a t n e a r him by t h e f en ce . " H o w m an y , Chr is ?" U r u b a a s k ed . " T w e n t y real old o n e s , " Chr ist i an P r a e g e r said. " H e y , k id, U r u b a a n d m e b r o k e o f f f o r t y - o n e p i e c e s of c h r o m e , " Blue C hi p said. " D o n ' t k n o c k h i m , " U r u b a said, " C h ri s h e r e is o nl y n i n e t e e n , just startin' o u t. O n e fine da y he'll r un his o w n recycling gang , w h e n w e ' s all rich. He'll f e e d t h e j u n k m a n all t h e old cars o n t h e East Co as t, kill t h e m all, h e l p m a k e t h e air cool a n d c le an a g a i n . " U r u b a c o u g h e d . " G o t it s t a s h e d all r ea dy t o be picked?" Pr a eg e r n o d d e d . It w as a l m o s t light e n o u g h in t h e alley for him t o s e e U r u b a ' s bl ack face a n d t h e gray s car o n his c h e e k . "I'll slap t h e b r e a d o n y o u t o m o r r o w , C h r i s , " U r u b a said. He c l a p p e d Pr a e g e r o n t h e s h o u l d e r a n d s t a r te d t o ge t up. "I n e e d it n o w , " P r a e ge r m u m b l e d . "I h ave to pay for my PLATO l e ss on s. I g o t t a h a v e it, h o n e s t . " 159
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U r u b a w as s t a n d i n g l o o k i n g d o w n at him n o w , a n d Blue C h i p s t o o d u p n ex t t o him. "I have t o , " P r a e g e r said as he s t o o d u p with t h e m . U r u b a h e s i t a t e d , a l m o s t as if t h e r e q u e s t h a d b e e n a p e r so n a l insult. T h e n h e s mi l e d . " S u r e , kid, h o w m u c h ? " "T we n t y - f iv e ," P ra eg er said. T h e smi le d i s a p p e a r e d , b u t h e c o u n t e d o u t t h e m o n e y . "This o n e t i m e , kid. Next t i m e y o u wait like all t h e o t h e r d u d e s . I pay off, my w o r d is g o o d , right?" P r a e g e r n o d d e d meekl y. He f o l d e d t h e bills into his j eans p o c k e t , trying n o t to l ook at t h e i r faces. But U r u b a a n d Blue C h i p t u r n e d f r om him a n d w a l k e d o u t of t h e alley, a n d he w a s r el ieved by t h e fact t h a t h e w o u l d n o t s e e t h e m for at least t w o w e e k s . He l o o k e d at his w a tc h. It w o u l d b e c o m p l e t e l y light in less t h a n a half h o u r . He s p r i n t e d o u t of t h e alley a n d u p t h e grayl ight ed s t r e e t t o w a r d t h e s u b w a y at 145th Street. He s ta rt ed c o u g h i n g a n d s l o w e d his p a c e to a walk t o c u t d o w n his n e e d for air. PLATO t h e sign r e a d: PROGRAMMI NG LOGIC FOR AUTOMATIC TEACHING OPERATIONS. O n c e t h e facility ha d b e e n f r ee , just like c h e s t X rays. N o w s t u d e n t s h a d t o pay t o milk t h e m a c h i n e , t w e n t y dollars a r ap; b u t it was a g o o d t e a c h if you w a n t e d t o learn a skill. Pr a e g e r w e n t u p t h e w i d e s t e ps l e a d i n g i nto t h e library a nd paid his m o n e y at t h e t ic ke t b o o t h . An u s h e r s h o w e d him to his usual b o o t h in t h e big r e s e a r c h hall. T he p r o g r a m was t e a c h i n g h im t h e w o r k i n g s of t h e city airfiltration s y s t e m , w h i c h was fully o p er a t i o n a l in M a n h a t t a n a n d slowly e x p a n d i n g . He k n e w t h at m a n y t e c h ni c a l d u d e s w o u l d b e n e e d e d t o service a n d ma in ta in it, a n d h e wa s g o i n g to b e in o n it after he f in is h ed c l o u ti n g cars. T h e o ld cars w e r e p ayi ng for his l e ss on s , b u t next year , o r t h e o n e after, t h e y w o u l d b e g o n e — leaving only t h e safety-cars, publi c w h e e l s a n d t h e electric p u s h t o r us h p e o p l e a r o u n d . T he n e w el ect ric cars w e r e n ' t b a d , b u t t h e r e w as s o m e t h i n g 160
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in t h e o l d e r p e o p l e t ha t l o v e d t h e r us h of p o w e r . So t h e old ve hi cl es w e r e sl ow in g o i n g, es pe ci a lly with all t h e b o o t l e g m e c h a n i c s servi cing t h e m a gai ns t t h e law t o k e e p t h e m legal. T he o ld w h e e l s w e r e a ss as si na t in g t h e a t m o s p h e r e , U r u b a said. W e kill t h e m , recycle t h e p e o p l e ' s r e s o u r c e s a n d m a k e s o m e b r e a d o n t h e deal t o o . U r u b a w as right, P r a e ge r t h o u g h t ; he w o u l d n o t have his PLATO l e ss on s w i t h o u t t h a t m o n e y . O n l y U r u b a d id a lot of o t h e r t h i n g s in t h e city, like r u n n i n g a s u p p l y of y o u n g girls t o t h e insular e s t a t e s o u t s i d e . U r u b a d id n o t c ar e a b o u t b e i n g right. It w as a c o i n c i d e n c e , s o m e t i m e s . P r a e g e r p u t o n his e a r p h o n e s . T h e f ir st e x a m q u e s t i o n a p p e a r e d o n t h e s c r e e n a n d h e a n s w e r e d it correct ly. W h e n h e c a m e o u t of t h e library at t w o in t h e a f t e r n o o n , h e s a w t h e o ld '74 st at ion w a g o n g r ow l i ng d o w n Fifth A v e n u e s p e w i n g b l u e s m o k e f ro m its tail pi pe . It w as a c o n t r a s t t o t h e bulky c r a s h p r o o f W a n k e l s , s t e a m e r s a n d sl ow elect rics m o v i n g o n t h e s tr e et with it. He w a t c h e d it s t o p a n d p a rk n e a r t h e c o r n e r of 4 2 n d St reet . T h e c ar w as o nl y t e n year s ol d, s o its o w n e r c o u l d still g e t away wi th it by c l ai mi ng t h a t it h a d n ' t fallen a pa rt . H e c o u l d k e e p r u n n i n g it legally until it did, b u t e v e n with its filters it w a s a pol lut er . M a y b e t h e o w n e r w a s n ' t e v e n h a ving it fixed o n t h e s i de, P r a e g e r t h o u g h t ; m a y b e it still ran well. As h e s t o o d at t h e t o p of t h e stairs, h e h a t e d t h e dirty w h e e l s , h a t e d t h e m as h e w o u l d a fearful b e a s t t ha t ha d s o m e h o w g o t t e n l o o s e in t h e w o r l d of m e n . He w a i t e d until t h e o w n e r left t h e car, t h e n w e n t t o w h e r e it w as p a r k e d a n d lifted t h e h o o d , t o o k o u t his p o c k e t tool a n d b e g a n r e m o v i n g t h e s p a r k p lugs . That d o n e , h e c u t a few wi res wi th his p o c k e t k n i f e . He c l o s e d t h e h o o d quickly a n d w a l k e d a w a y f r o m t h e c a r. No o n e h a d n o t i c e d h i m . Later t o n i g h t s o m e o n e w o u l d strip it d o w n for all of its v alua bl es , U r u b a o r o n e of t h e o t h e r g an gs . A n o t h e r o n e of t h e o ld killers w as effectively d e a d . H e t h o u g h t of his d e a d p a r e n t s as h e s l i p p e d t h e s p a r k pl ug s i nto t h e s e w e r dr ai n at t h e c o r n e r . Pr a e g e r s t o o d o n t h e r oo f of his a p a r t m e n t b u il di ng l o o k i ng 161
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u p at t h e stars h i di ng o n t h e o t h e r s i de of t h e air; st¡li, t h e b r i g ht e r o n e s w e r e clearly visible, d r a w i n g him away fr om t h e e a r t h t o t h e brightly lit s p a c e st ati ons circling t h e p l a n e t a n d out to the diamondlike m oon do m e s w here men se e m e d to b e d o i n g s o m e t h i n g w o r t h w h i l e . He saw U r u b a a n d Blue Chi p living in t h e s h a d o w s of t h e u n iv e rs e , profiting f ro m c h a n g e s t h a t w o u l d h a p p e n w i t h o u t t h e m . He t h o u g h t of t h e W h i t e A s s a s s i n s , S a v a g e S kul ls, Black W a r l o c k s a n d C o n s e r v a t i v e A n g el s — all t h e night rulers of N e w York City. He t h o u g h t of t h e i r w o r d s , political p h r a s e s c o p i e d after t h e Black Lords a n d Y o u ng P a n t h e r s , t h e largest nat i onal g r o u p s . He t h o u g h t of his PLATO l e ss on s , w h i c h w o u l d liberat e him f r om his o p e n air-¡ntake a p a r t m e n t , t a k e him away f r om t h e m e m o r y of his p a r e n t s a n d p ubli c s c h o o l i n g , give him s o m e t h i n g to d o in w h i c h h e c o u l d t a k e pride. He w as g o i n g t o d o s o m e t h i n g else, a n d s o o n . In t w o w e e k s , h e e s t i m a t e d , h e w o u l d b e r e ad y to t a k e t h e c o m p u t e r t ests for a t e chn ic a l rating. He w o u l d have t o tell U r u b a a n d Blue Chip that he w an te d out, but he wasn't sure h o w he would say it t o t h e m . He t u r n e d a r o u n d a n d w e n t d o w n t h e stairs t o his a p a r t m e n t . U r u b a s q u i n t e d a t h ¡ m i n t h e d i m light of t h e b a s e m e n t r o o m . Blue C hi p h ad g o n e t o g e t a b ul b for t h e s h a d e d light h a n g i n g darkly o v e r t h e o ld car d t a b l e w h e r e t h e y w e r e sitting. "You c o s t m e m o n e y , m a n. W h y you g o i n g to q u it ? " Blue C h i p c a m e b a c k with a b ul b a n d s c r e w e d it into t h e s o c ke t . The l a m p s w u n g b a c k a n d for th for a m o m e n t a n d s t o p p e d w h e n U r u b a p u l l e d t h e swi t ch c o r d. Yellow light filled t h e d u s t y cellar r o o m . "Yell ow' s all I c o u l d f i n d , " Blue C h i p said. Pr a eg e r l o o k e d at U r ub a . His black f ace l o o k e d s t r a n g e in t h e light. U r u b a s mi l e d at him g r o t e s q u e l y , s h o w i n g him his o n e gol d t o o t h . " C h r i s h e r e w a n t s o u t , " U r u b a said. " W h a t d o y ou th i nk , Blue C h i p? " 162
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Blue C hi p g iggl e d n e r v ou s ly a n d l e a n e d his chai r b a c k o n its h i nd legs. “ I k n o w , " Blue C h i p said, " h e ' s b e e n g o i n g t o s c h o o l o n t h e sly t o t h e m PLATO l e s s o n s . " U r u b a g r i n n e d . "You tryin' t o b e b e t t e r t h a n us, is t h a t right?" h e a s k e d . An d h e left a big s i le nc e for Pr a eg e r t o d r o w n in. Finally h e a n s w e r e d . "I j us t w a n t o t h e r kinds of t h in g s , t h a t 's all," h e said. " T h e h o n k o always g o e s b a c k , " Blue C hi p said. " H o w m u c h have y o u s t a s h e d ? " " W h e r e y o u g o i ng , Chris, t o t h e m o o n r e so rt s with all t h e rich c ats?" a s k e d U r u b a . " W h e r e ' s all y o u r b r e a d ? Have you b e e n c h e a t i n g o n us?" "I just w a n t a t e c h rating t o w o r k in t h e n e w air plants. T h e m o n e y ' s g o o d , " P r a e g e r said. U r u b a l e a n e d f o r w ar d a n d k n o c k e d t h e c a r d t a b l e into t h e air, b r e a k i n g t h e y e ll ow light. " W h a t t h e rest of us g o i n g t o b r e a t h e ? " h e a s k e d in t h e d a r k n e s s . " W h o y o u t h in k ca n m o v e into t h o s e a ir -cont r ol a p a r t m e n t s ? Chris, y o u ' r e a fool, a blazing monkey!" " Th i n g s may g e t b e t t e r , " Pr a eg e r m a n a g e d t o say. "Like h el l , " Blue C h i p a n n o u n c e d f r om a d a r k c o r n e r of t h e r o o m . The o nl y light in t h e r o o m n o w c a m e in t h r o u g h t h e small w i n d o w n e a r t h e d o o r . P r a e g e r w e n t t o t h e d o o r quickly, o p e n e d it a n d ran u p t h e o l d s t e p s t o t h e s tr e et . He wa s o u t of b r e a t h w h e n h e r e a c h e d t h e si de wa lk . He s t o p p e d , a n d f ro m b e l o w h e h e a r d t h e s o u n d of U r u b a ' s l a u gh t e r , m o c k i n g his fear. It s t o p p e d . T h e n U r u b a s c r e a m e d af ter him f r om b e l o w t h e p a v e m e n t . " C h ri s , I h e l p e d y o u , I g o t y o u st a rt e d, I t a u g h t y o u , b o y — a n d this is w h a t I get? I'm g o n n a g e t y o u , m a n. You b e t t e r h i d e y o u r m o n e y , y ou h e a r ! " The voi ce d i e d away, a n d P r a e ge r s t o o d p er fe ctl y still in f r o nt of t h e old b r o w n s t o n e . T h en h e was s h a k i n g a n d his b o d y was c o v e r e d with sweat . H e l o o k e d u p at t h e sky, at all t h e o ld b ui l di ngs in this seal ed- of f p a rt of ol d Ha r le m. He l o o k e d d o w n t o w n w h e r e t h e lighted 163
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c o n s t r u c t i o n o n N e w York's s e c o n d level l o o k e d like a h u g e d i a m o n d - s t u d d e d s p i d e r d e v o u r ¡ n g t h e city in t h e night. Slowly, h e b e g a n w a lk i ng h o m e . Eyes w a t c h e d him w h e n h e w e n t t o his PLATO l e ss o n s a n d w h e n h e c a m e h o m e . O n T u e s d a y s a n d T h ur s d a ys w h e n he s t a ye d h o m e h e felt t h e m o n t h e w i n d o w s of his fifth-floor a p a r t m e n t o n 10th St r e et , a n d h e was afraid t o g o n e a r t h e m ; b u t w h e n h e t ri ed t o s e e if a n y o n e w a s f ol l o wi ng h im, h e c o u l d find n o o n e . In t h e m i d d l e of t h e n ig h t o n a M o n d a y a cr ash of glass w o k e him in b e d . He g o t u p a n d w e n t into t h e living r o o m , t u r n i n g o n t h e light. He s aw a large r ock lying o n t h e floor. Pr a eg e r c h e c k e d t h e f r o n t - d o o r p oli ce lock. It was still firm. T h e n h e g o t s o m e c a r d b o a r d a n d t a p e f r o m t h e ki tc he n a n d began taping up the broken window. As h e w o r k e d h e told hims e lf t h a t h e u n d e r s t o o d all this. U r u b a w a n t e d o n e t h i n g: t o r e n d a n d te a r a n d h u r t hi m. He wa s an eas y t a r ge t , e a s i er t o h u r t t h a n t h e c o p s in t h e i r airc o n d i t i o n e d t a n k cars, e as i e r t o d e s t r o y t h a n a car. And to h u r t him m e a n t m o r e t h a n m o n e y , t ha t ' s h o w U r u b a w as t h i n k ing. P r a e ge r was a d e s e r t e r , a n d U r u b a c o u l d n o t a c c e p t t hat. For Blue C h i p it w as r e c r e at io n t o h o u n d hi m, a n d Blue C h i p t h o u g h t P r a e ge r was h i di ng m o n e y . He h a d j ust p u t a final p i e c e of t a p e o n t h e w i n d o w w h e n t w o s h o t s c a m e t h r o u g h t h e c a r d b o a r d . P r a e ge r fell t o t h e floor a n d lay still. He lay t h e r e f or a n h o u r , afraid t o m o v e . Finally h e c r a w l e d b e h i n d t h e s ofa, w h e r e h e fell i nto a n e r v o u s s l e e p just b e f o r e m o r n i n g . He w as g o i n g t o h a v e t o leave t o w n . U r u b a w as cr azy a n d it w o u l d g e t w o r s e . His e x a m s a n d PLATO w o u l d have t o wait. He p a c k e d a k n a p s a c k a n d w e n t d o w n into t h e b a s e m e n t , w h e r e h e k ep t his old m o t o r c y c l e . He w h e e l e d it o u t i nto t h e yard, w h i c h w a s c o n n e c t e d t o t h e s t r e e t by a c o n c r e t e r a m p . He l o o k e d at his w a t c h . T h e g l ow i n g n u m b e r s told him it w a s an h o u r t o d a w n. 164
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He s t a r t e d t h e b ike with a d o w n w a r d lur ch of his f o o t a n d rolled o u t t h e r a m p slowly. He t u r n e d i nt o t h e s t r e e t a n d s ta rt ed in t h e d ir e ct io n of Riverside Drive. T h e s t r e et s w e r e d e s e r t e d at this h o u r . After a f e w m i n u t e s h e n o t i c e d t h e lights of t h e ca r b e h i n d him. He g u n n e d t h e bi ke a n d s h o t u p t h e e n t r a n c e t o Riverside a n d o u t o n t o t h e hi ghway. Traffic was light a n d h e c o n t i n u e d ac ce ler at in g. A f e w m i n u t e s later t h e car was still b e h i n d hi m a n d gaining. To his left t h e river w a s c o v e r e d by a fog, b u t t h e lights o n t h e Je rs e y s h o r e w e r e c o m i n g t h r o u g h . P r a e ge r g u n n e d his e n g i n e a n d t h e bike c ar r ie d him f o r wa r d, pas t t w o Wa n ke l s afet y-t anks m o v i n g slowly t o t h e i r d e s t i n a t i o n . He l o o k e d at his s p e e d o m e t e r a n d s aw t ha t h e was d o i n g 115. He k n e w t h a t t h e n e w - l o o k i n g car b e h i n d him c o u l d c a tc h him, b u t he h a d a h e a d start. He t h o u g h t , I h ave a right t o try t o b e t t e r myself, g o t o s c h o ol . T h e m o n e y c a m e f r o m U r u b a ' s w o r l d , h e k n e w t ha t, b u t t h e r e w as n o o t h e r way. Food was given o u t f ree, just e n o u g h , b u t m o r e t h a n t h a t c o u l d b e b o u g h t o nl y wit h skills. You c o u l d g o to s c h o o l if y o u paid for it, b u t you c o u l d live w i t h o u t it. It w as a luxury for t h o s e w h o h a d a h u n g e r for it. U r u b a h a t e d him for w a n t i n g it. As h e r u s h e d t h r o u g h t h e night , P r a e g e r felt t ea rs in his e ye s b lu r ri ng t h e h ig hw ay a n d t h e sight of t h e river with its lights o n t h e far s h o r e . T h e air was d a m p o n his face, a n d t h e r o a d was a n u n y i e l d i n g h a r d n e s s u n d e r t h e b i k e 's r u b b e r wheels. T he car w a s still in his mi r r or , its lights o n b ri g h t t o a n n o y him. It was w i n d i n g its way past t h e o c c as i o n a l e lect r ics a n d s t e a m e r s o n t h e r o a d, c o m i n g c los e r . He p u s h e d f or wa r d on t h e black r o a d, trying t o m o v e b e y o n d t h e light b e a m s o n his back. T he car d i s a p p e a r e d f r o m his mi rror. P r a e ge r a c c e l e r a t e d , e a g e r t o p r e s s his m o m e n t a r y a d v a n t a g e . He h a d t h e r oa d to hi mse lf for t h e n ex t f e w m i n u t e s . T h e n t h e r o a d c u r v e d u p w a r d a n d t o t h e right, a n d h e w a s r u s h i n g o v e r t h e small b r i d ge i nto t h e Bronx. He s a w t h e car in his m ir r or again w h e n h e 165
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t o o k t h e G r a n d C o n c o u r s e e n t r a n c e , a n d it k e p t p a c e with him a l o n g t h e e n t i r e six miles of t h e w i d e a v e n u e . Ten m i n u t e s later h e w as o n t h e e d g e s of t h e old city, f le ei ng u p s ta t e. H e r e h e w as a m o n g t h e d y in g t r e e s n o r t h w e s t of N e w York, d a r k o u t l i n e s a ga in st t h e ni gh t sky, t h o u s a n d s of a cr es of lifeless w o o d l a n d , a b u c k l e d c a r p e t of hills a n d gullies. He h a d t a ke n t h e old t w o- w ay a s p h a l t r o a d w a y in t h e h o p e of losing U r u b a ' s sh i ny a n t i q u e . Pr a e g e r felt a s t r a n g e s e n s a t i o n o n t h e b a c k of his n e c k w h e n h e s aw t h e car in his m i r r or again. It w a s n ' t U r u b a fo ll owin g him in t h e car, h a t ing h im; it was t h e car, fixing him with its b u r n i n g e ye s, r e a dy t o c o m e f o r w ar d a n d c r u s h him u n d e r its w h e e l s . The car was trying t o hol d hi m ba ck , g et ti ng e v e n for all of its kind h e h ad killed with U r u ba . It w as trying to s t o p him f ro m e s c a p i n g t o a n o t h e r kind of life, just as it ha d s t o p p e d his p a r en t s. T h e car h a t e d t h e soft c r e a t u r e s living in t h e w o r l d with it, h a t e d t h e p ar asi t es w h o w e r e slowly t a ki ng away its w e a p o n s , t a m i n g it, m a k in g it an u n p o ¡ s o n o u s a n d p o w e r l e s s d o m e s t i c vehi cl e. A r o u n d him in t h e ni gh t s t o o d t h e n a k e d t r e e s , t h e s t r i p p e d victims of t h e car's e x c r e t i o n s . He l i st en ed t o t h e thi ck d r o n e of t h e m o t o r c y c l e e n g i n e . He was riding a p o w e r e d i n s e c t t ha t wa s b r o t h e r t o t h e w h e e l e d b e a s t p u r s u i n g it, jaw o p e n to swallow. The m o o n b r u s h e d o ut from b e h in d th e thinning c l o u d s o n his left, riding low o ve r t h e t r e e s , its w h i t e light f r i ght e ni ngly pale. He w e n t a r o u n d a w i d e c u r v e in t h e r o ad , h o l d i n g closely t o t h e right s h o u l d e r , m o m e n t a r i l y e s c a p i n g t h e car's lights. H e c a m e o u t into a s h o r t st ra ig ht awa y a n d s u d d e n l y t h e road c u r v e d agai n, a n d t h e car w as still o u t of sight b e h i n d him. He g u n n e d t h e e n g i n e t o t h e limit, h o p i n g to stay a h e a d for g o o d . S u d d e n l y his h e a dl i g ht failed, leaving him to r ush f or wa r d a l o n e in t h e d a r k n e s s . T he m o o n slid b e h i n d s o m e c l o u d s . T h e r e w as s o m e kind of small b r i d g e a h e a d . He ha d g l i m p s e d it in t h e m o o n l i g h t ; n o w h e c o u l d ba re ly s e e its l att icewor k 166
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a g ai ns t t h e sky. In a m o m e n t h e k n e w w h a t h e was g o i n g to d o . He b r a k e d t h e cycle a n d j u m p e d at t h e last m o m e n t . H e h i t t h e ro ad s h o u l d e r a n d r olled t o a s t o p. T h e bi ke r u s h e d o v e r t h e b r i d g e t o t h e o t h e r s id e a n d into s o m e t r e e s , w h e r e it s t o p p e d with a c r u n c h . Pr a eg e r s aw t h at h e w as lying n e a r an o ld r o a d b l o c k h o r s e t h a t h ad a d e t o u r sign nai led t o it. He g o t u p a n d d r a g g e d it to b l o c k t h e r oa d to t h e b r i d g e a n d to d i r e c t traffic t o t h e right, directly o n t o t h e s l o p e t ha t ran d o w n t o t h e river. He s p r i n t e d i nto t h e d e a d w o o d f o r es t a n d hid b e h i n d a t r ee . In a m o m e n t h e h e a r d U r u b a ' s w h e e l s s c r e e c h i n g in t h e t u rn s . T h e h e ad l i g h t s c a m e a r o u n d t h e b e n d , g h os t l y rays c u t ti ng t h r o u g h t h e d a r k n e s s . T h e r e was n o t i m e f o r t h e c a r t o d o a n y t h i n g b u t f ol low t h e d e t o u r a r r ow . He h e a r d t h e b r a ke s go o n b u t it was t o o late. T h e left h e a d l i g h t s h a t t e r e d against t h e r o a d b l o c k a n d t h e car flew o ve r t h e e d g e , t u r n i n g o v e r o n its f r o n t e n d w h e n it hit b o t t o m a n d l a n di n g in t h e river to p down. It b u r s t into a fireball a n d b u r n e d in its o w n b l e e d i n g s , w h i c h s e t t h e river o n fire, t h e d a rk -f lo wi ng river filled with s l u d g e a n d acid a n d s l a u g h t e r h o u s e b l o o d , f l a m m a b l e c h e m i c a l s a n d t h e vitals o f all e a r t h ' s c r e a t u r e s . T h e fire s p r e a d quickl y u n d e r t h e b r i d g e , a n d t h e old w o o d e n s t r u c t u r e s t a rt e d t o ca t ch fire. Pr a e g e r left his h i d i n g pl ac e a n d ran a cr os s t h e b r id g e , h o p i n g to find his cycle in w o r k i n g o r d e r . The s t e n c h f r om t h e river wa s e n o u g h t o m a k e him g a s p as h e w e n t a cr os s . From t h e o t h e r s ide h e l o o k e d d o w n at t h e b u r n i n g hu l k, a d a r k b e as t e n g u l f e d by f lames , a n d t h e river, w h i c h w o u l d b u r n up- a n d d o w n s t r e a m until t h e fire r e a c h e d a r e a s f r e e of f l a m m a b l e materials. P r a eg e r sat d o w n on t h e far b a n k a n d w a t c h e d t h e b u r n i n g . It w a s n ' t U r u b a w h o was dyi ng, n o t jus t U r u b a o r Blue Chi p. It wa s a c r e a t u r e dy ing t h e r e in t h e dirty w a t e r s — t h e s a m e w a t e r s t h a t a f ew year s a g o ha d t h r e a t e n e d t h e East with a n e w p o l l u ti o n- f ed m i c r o o r g a n i s m a l p l ag ue . For a f ew m o n t h s it h a d l o o k e d as if a n e w killer, m u c h like b u b o n i c p la gu e, 167
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w o u l d b e l o o s e d o n t h e land; f o r t un a t e l y by t h a t t i m e m a n y rivers c o u l d b e b u r n e d , o r easily h e l p e d t o c at ch fire, a n d t h e t h r e a t of e p i d e m i c ha d p a s s e d away in a c l e a n s i n g flame. U r u b a h a d b e e n a s c a v e n g e r living off t h e just laws a n d m a n ' s efforts t o reclaim n a t u r e for himself. Pr a eg e r felt as if h e w e r e c o m i n g o u t of a s t r a n g e c o n f u s i o n , a living d r e a m t h a t h a d held him in its gr as p. A slight w i n d b l e w t h e stifling f u m e s f r om t h e river t o w a r d him, ma k i n g his e y e s w a t e r , o p p r e s s i n g him with a s a d n e s s t o o s et tl ed f or te ar s, e v e n t h o u g h t h e y w e r e p r e s e n t o n his face. Later t h e fla me s d i e d t o a flicker o n t h e w a t e r s . T h e sky c l e a r e d in t h e e a s t a n d t h e m o r n i n g star c a m e o u t , brilliant b e f o r e t h e s u n , still h id ing b e l o w t h e h o r i z o n . As t h e s u n c a m e u p , Pr a e g e r c o u l d s e e t h e t o w e r s of t h e city t o t h e s o u t h , t h e i r glassy f acets c a t c h i n g t h e s u n ' s s h o u t . He g o t u p a n d l o o k e d a r o u n d at t h e s tr ic ke n f o r es t land in t h e m o r n i n g light, p a t c h e d h e r e a n d t h e r e with n e w g r e e n e r y s t r uggl ing o u t of t h e g r o u n d a n d a l o n g t r e e b r a n c h e s . The b r i d g e at his right was a c i n d e r , still slowly c o l la p s in g into t h e river. He d e c i d e d t o m a k e his w a y a l o n g t h e b a n k o n f oo t until h e f o u n d a n o t h e r b r i d g e w h e r e h e c o u l d c r os s t o t h e o t h e r s i d e a n d r e t u r n to t h e city.
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G ettin g A cross ROBERT SILVERBERG I O n t h e first da y of s u m m e r my m o n t h - w ¡ f e , S¡lena Ruiz, filched o u r district's m a s t e r p r o g r a m f ro m t h e C a n fi e ld Hol d c o m p u t e r c e n t e r a n d d i s a p p e a r e d w it h it. A g u a r d at t h e Hol d has c o n f e s s e d t h a t s h e w o n a d m i t t a n c e by s e d u c i n g h im , t h e n gave him a d r u g . S o m e say s h e is in C o n n i n g To wn n o w ; o t h e r s have h e a r d r u m o r s t h a t s h e has b e e n s e e n in M o r t o n C o u r t ; still o t h e r s ma int a in h e r d e s t i n a t i o n w as T h e Mill. I s u p p o s e it d o e s n o t m a t t e r w h e r e s h e has g o n e . W h a t m a t t e r s is t h a t w e are w i t h o u t o u r p r o g r a m . W e h av e lived w i t h o u t it for e l e v e n days a n d t h i n g s a re s t ar ti ng t o b r e a k d o w n . The h e a t is a b o m i n a b l e , b u t w e m u s t switch e ve ry t h e r m o s t a t to m a n u a l o v e r r i d e b e f o r e w e c an u s e o u r c o o l i n g s y s t e m ; I t h i n k w e will boil in o u r skins b e f o r e t h e j o b is d o n e . A m a l fu n c t io n of t h e s c a n n e r s t h a t c o n t r o l o u r r e f u se c o m p a c t o r has stilled t h e g a r b a g e c o l l e c t or s, w h i c h will n o t g o for th u n l e s s t h e y h ave a place t o d u m p w h a t t h e y col lect. Since n o o n e k n o w s t h e p r o p e r c o m m a n d t o give t h e c o m p a c t o r , r u b b i s h a c c u m u l a t e s , f o r m i n g p e s t i l e n tial hills o n ev e ry st r ee t , a n d d e n s e s w a r m s of flies o r w o r s e h o v e r o ve r t h e s p r a wl in g m o u n d s . B e gi nn i ng o n t h e f o u r t h da y o u r pol ice also b e g a n t o g o i m m o b i l e — w h o can say why? — a n d by n o w all of t h e m s t a n d h a lte d in t h e i r tracks. S o m e a re a lr ea dy s tar ti ng t o rust, si nce t h e m a i n t e n a n c e s c h e d u l e s a re o u t of p h a s e . W o r d has g o n e o u t t h a t w e a re w i t h o u t p r o t e c t i o n, a n d o u t l a n d e r s c r o ss into t h e district with i mp uni ty, m o l e s t i n g o u r w o m e n , steal ing o u r c h i l d r e n , r ai di ng o u r stocks of f o o d s tu f fs . In Ganf¡eld Hol d, p l a t o o n s of we ar y, s we a t i n g 169
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t e c h n i c i a n s toil c o ns t a n t l y to r ep la ce t h e missing p r o g r a m , b u t it mi ght b e m o n t h s , e v e n ye ar s, b e f o r e t h e y will b e a bl e t o d ev i se a n e w o n e . In t h e o r y , d u p l i c a t e p r o g r a m s a re s t o r e d in several places wi thin t h e c o m m u n i t y a ga ins t just s u c h a calamity. In fact, w e h a ve n o n e . T h e o n e k e p t in t h e district c a p t ai n ' s office t u r n e d o u t t o b e s o m e t w e n t y y e ar s o b s o l e t e ; t h e o n e in t h e care of t h e s oul f at he r 's h o u s e h a d b e e n d e v o u r e d by rats; t h e p r o g r a m h el d in t h e vaults o f t h e tax c ol l e c to rs a p p e a r e d to b e intact, b u t w h e n it w a s p l a c ed in t h e i n p u t slot it my s te ri ous ly failed t o activate t h e c o m p u t e r s . So w e a re h el pl es s : an e n t i r e district, h u n d r e d s of t h o u s a n d s of h u m a n b e i n g s , c u t l oo s e t o drift o n t h e t i d e s of c h a n c e . Silena, S¡lena, Silena! To d is a ble all of Ganf ¡el d, t o m a k e o u r a lr ea dy b u r d e n s o m e lives m o r e difficult, t o e x p o s e m e t o t h e h a t r ed of my n e i g h b o r s . . . Wh y, S¡lena? Why? P e o p l e glare at m e o n t h e s tr ee ts. Th e y h o l d m e r e s p o n s i b l e , in a way, for all this. They p o i nt a n d m u t t e r ; in a n o t h e r f ew days t h e y will b e spitting a n d c u r s in g ; a n d if n o relief c o m e s s o o n , t h e y may b e t h r o w i n g s t o n e s . Look, I w a n t t o s h o u t , s h e wa s o nl y my m o n t h - w i f e a n d s h e a c t e d e nt ir el y o n h er o w n . I a s s u r e y o u I h a d n o i de a s h e w o u l d d o s u c h a thi ng. A nd yet t h e y b l a m e m e . At t h e w e a l t hy h o u s e s of M o r t o n C o u r t t h e y will d i n e t o n i g h t o n b a b i e s s to l en in Ganf¡eld this day, a n d I a m h el d a c c o u n t a b l e . W h a t will I do? W h e r e can I tur n? I may have to flee. T h e t h o u g h t of c r o s s i n g district lines chills m e . Is it t h e peril of d e a t h I f ear or o nl y t h e loss of all t h a t is familiar? P r o b a b y b o t h : I have n o h u n g e r for dying a n d n o wish t o leave Ganf¡eld. Yet I will g o, n o m a t t e r h o w difficult it will b e t o find s a n c t u a r y if I g e t safely a c ros s t h e line. If t h e y c o n t i n u e t o h o l d m e t a i n t e d by Silena's c ri me , I will h av e n o c h o i c e . I t h i n k I w o u l d r at he r di e at t h e h a n d s of s t r a n g e r s t h a n p e r i sh at t h o s e of my o w n p e o p l e . II This s we l t e r i n g ni g h t I find myself a t o p Ganf¡el d T o w e r , s e e k
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ing c ool b r e e z e s a n d t h e s h e l t e r of d a r k n e s s . Half t h e district has h a d t h e idea of e s c a p i n g t h e h e a t by c o m i n g u p h e r e t o night, it s e e m s ; t o g e t away f r o m t h e a ng r y e ye s a n d t i g h t e n e d lips, I h av e c l i m b e d to t h e fifth p a r a p e t , w h e r e o nl y t h e b o l d a n d t h e foolish ordi nari l y go. I a m n e i t h e r , yet h e r e I a m. As I m o v e slowly a r o u n d t h e t o w e r ' s rim, warily cl ingi ng to t h e old a n d e r o d e d guar dr ai l, I have a vi ew of o u r e n t i r e district. Ganf ield is like a s h a l lo w basin in f o r m , g e ntl y s lo p i n g u p w a r d f r o m t h e cent ral s pi k e t h a t is t h e t o w e r t o a rise o n t h e district p e r i m e t e r . They say t h a t a b r o a d lake o n c e o c c u p i e d t h e site w h e r e Ganf iel d n o w s t a n d s ; it was d r a i n e d a n d c o v e r e d o v e r, c e n t u r i e s a go , w h e n t h e n e e d for n e w living s p a c e b e c a m e e x t r e m e . Ye s te rda y I h e a r d t h a t g r e a t p u m p s ar e u s e d to k e e p t h e a n c i e n t lake f ro m b r e a k i n g t h r o u g h into o u r cellars, a n d t h a t b e f o r e very l o n g t h e p u m p s will fail o r s h u t t h e m s e l v e s d o w n for m a i n t e n a n c e , a n d w e will b e f l o o d e d . P e r h ap s so. Ga nf ie ld o n c e d e v o u r e d t h e lake; will t h e lake n o w h av e G a n field? Will w e t u m b l e into t h e d ar k w a t e r s a n d b e s w al l o w ed , with n o o n e t o m o u r n us? I l oo k o u t o v e r Ganf iel d. T h e s e tall brick b o x e s a re o u r d w e l l ings, t w e n t y s to ri es high b u t d w a r f e d fr om my v a n t a g e po i nt far a b o v e . This sliver of land, bl ack in t h e s m o k y m o o n l i g h t , is o u r pitiful s c ra p of c o m m u n i t y park. T h e s e low f la t - t o p p e d b ui l d in g s a r e o u r s h o p s , a h e l t e r- s k e lt e r c lus ter . This is o u r i ndust rial z o n e , s u c h t h a t it is. That s q u a t s h a d o w - c l o a k e d bulk j ust n o r t h of t h e t o w e r is Ga nf ie ld Hold, w h e r e o u r c r i p pl e d c o m p u t e r s slip o n e by o n e into i d l en e ss . I have s p e n t nearly my w h o l e life wi thi n this o n e n a r r o w s w i n g of t h e c o m p a s s t h a t is Ga nf ie ld. W h e n I w a s a b o y a n d affairs w e r e n o t nearly so h a r s h b e t w e e n o n e district a n d its n e i g h b o r , my fa t h e r t o o k m e o n ho li da y t o M o r t o n C o u r t , a n d a n o t h e r t i m e t o The Mill. W h e n I w as a y o u n g m a n I w as s e n t o n b u s i n e s s a cr os s t h r e e districts t o Parley Cl os e. I r e m e m b e r t h o s e j o u r n e y s as clearly a n d vividly as t h o u g h I h a d d r e a m e d t h e m . But e v e r y t hi n g is q u i t e d i f fe r en t n o w a n d it is t w e n t y y ea r s s i n c e I last left G a n field. I a m n o t o n e of y o u r privil eged c o m m u t e r s , gaily ma k in g tr ansit f ro m z o n e t o z o n e . All t h e w o r l d is o n e g r e a t city, so 171
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it is said, wi th t h e d e s e r t s s e t t le d a n d t h e rivers b r i d g e d a n d all t h e o p e n pl ac es filled, a universal city t h a t has a b o l i s h e d t h e old b o u n d a r i e s , a n d ye t it is t w e n t y year s s i n c e I p a s s e d f r om o n e district t o t h e next. I w o n d e r : Are w e o n e city, t h e n , o r m e r e l y t h o u s a n d s of c o n t e n t i o u s , f r a g m e n t e d , tiny states? Look h e r e , a l o n g t h e p e r i m e t e r . T h e r e a re n o m o r e b o u n d a ries, b u t w h a t is this? This is o u r b o u n d a r y , Ganf¡eld C r e s c e n t , t h a t w i d e , c u r v i ng b o u l e v a r d s u r r o u n d i n g t h e district. Are y ou a m a n of s o m e o t h e r z o n e ? T h e n c r o ss t h e C r e s c e n t at risk of life. D o y o u s e e o u r pol ice m a c h i n e s , b l u n t - s n o u t e d , glossy, f o r m i d a b l y p o w e r f u l , s t r e wn like b o u l d e r s in t h e b r o a d a v e n u e ? T he y will i n t e r r o g a t e y o u , a n d if y o u r a n s w e r s a r e u n e a s y , t h e y m a y d e s t r o y y o u . O f c o u r s e t h e y can d o n o o n e a ny h a r m t o night. Look o u t w a r d n o w , at o u r h o r d e of b r aw l in g n e i g h b o r s . I s e e b e y o n d t h e C r e s c e n t t o t h e e a st t h e g a u n t s pi r e s of C o n n i n g T ow n , a n d o n t h e w e s t , d e s c e n d i n g s t e p w i s e into t h e j u m b l e d valley, t h e s h a b b y d a r k- wa l le d bu i ld in gs o f T h e Mill, with h a p p y M o r t o n C o u r t o n t h e far s ide, a n d s o m e w h e r e in t h e s m o k y d i s t a n c e o t h e r p l ac es , F o l ks t o n e a n d Budl eigh a n d Ha wk N es t a n d Parley C l o s e a n d Kingston a n d O l d G r o v e a n d all t h e rest, t h e districts, t h e myri ad districts, part of t h e cha in t h a t s t r e t c h e s f r om se a t o s ea, f ro m s h o r e t o s h o r e , s p a n n i n g o u r c o n t i n e n t b o r d e r t o b o r d e r , t h e districts, t h e c h ip s of g a u d y glass m a k i n g u p t h e global mo s a i c , t h e infinitely n u m e r o u s c o m m u n i t i e s that are th e s e g m e n t s of th e a ll- e n c o m p a s s in g world-city. T on i gh t at t h e capital t h e y a re p l a n n i n g n ex t m o n t h ' s rainfall p a t t e r n s f or districts t h a t t h e p l a n n e r s h av e n e v e r s e e n . District f o o d a l lo c at io n s— i n a d e q u a t e , always i n a d e q u a t e — a re b e i n g d e v i s e d by m e n t o w h o m o u r a p p e t i t e s a r e p u r el y a b s t ra c t ent iti es. D o t h e y b el ie ve in o u r e x i s t e n c e , at t h e capital? Do t h e y really t h i n k t h e r e is s u c h a pl ace as Ganf¡eld? W h a t if w e s e n t t h e m a d e l e g a t i o n of n o t a b l e cit izens t o a sk for h el p in r ep l a c in g o u r lost p r o g r a m ? W o u l d t h e y care? W o u l d t h e y e v e n listen? For t h a t m a t t e r , is t h e r e a capital at all? H o w can I, w h o h av e n e v e r s e e n n e a r b y O l d G r o v e , a c c e p t , o n faith a l o n e , 172
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t h e e x i s t e n c e of a far-off g o v e r n i n g c e n t e r , aloof, i n a cc es si bl e, s h r o u d e d in myt h? M a y b e it is onl y a c o n s t r u c t of s o m e c u n n i n g s u b t e r r a n e a n m a c h i n e t h a t is o u r real ruler. That w o u l d n ot s u r p r i s e m e . N o t h i n g s u r p r i s e s m e . T h e r e is n o capital. T h e r e a re n o central p l a n n e r s . Be y on d t h e h o r i z o n e v e r y t h i n g is mist.
III In t h e office, at least, n o o n e d a r e s s h o w hostility t o me . T h e r e ar e n o s cowl s, n o gl ares, n o s n i d e r e f e r e n c e s t o t h e mi ssi ng p r o g r a m . I a m , after all, c hi ef d e p u t y t o t h e District C o m m i s s i o n e r of Nu t ri tion, a n d si nc e t h e c o m m i s s i o n e r is u s u ally a b s e n t , I a m , in effect, in c h a r g e of t h e d e p a r t m e n t . If Si lena's c r i m e d o e s n o t d e s t r o y my c a r e e r , it m i gh t p r o v e to h av e b e e n u n w i s e for my s u b o r d i n a t e s t o t r e a t m e with d isdai n. In a n y c as e w e ar e so b u s y t h a t t h e r e is n o t i m e for s u c h ga mb its . W e a r e r e s p o n s i b l e for k e e p i n g t h e c o m m u n i t y p r o p e r l y fed; o u r tasks have b e e n greatly c o m p l i c a t e d by t h e loss of t h e p r o g r a m , for t h e r e is n o reliable w ay n o w of p r o c e s s i n g o u r al locati on s h e e t s , a n d w e m u s t req ui si t i on a n d d i st r i b ut e f o o d by g u e s s w o r k a n d m e m o r y . H o w m a n y bal es of p l a n k t o n c u b e s d o w e c o n s u m e e a c h w e e k ? H o w m a n y p o u n d s of p r o t e o i d mix? H o w m u c h b r e a d f or t h e s h o p s o f Lower Ganf¡eld? W h a t fads of d iet a re likely t o s w e e p t h e district this m o n t h ? If d e m a n d a n d s u p p l y fall into i m b a l a n c e as a resul t of o u r mis calcul ati ons , t h e r e c o u ld b e w id e s p r e a d acts of v io le n c e , forays into n e i g h b o r i n g districts, e v e n r e n e w e d o u t b r e a k s of c a nn i ba l is m w ith in Ganf¡el d itself. So w e m u s t d r a w u p o u r e s t i m a t e s with t h e g r e a t e s t p r e c is io n . W h a t a t er r ib le spiritual isolation w e feel d e c i d i n g s u c h t h i n g s with n o c o m p u t e r s t o g u i d e us! IV O n t h e f o u r t e e n t h da y o f t h e crisis t h e district c a pt ai n s u m m o n s m e . His m e s s a g e c o m e s in late a f t e r n o o n , w h e n w e all ar e dizzy with fati gue, c h o k e d by hu mi di ty . For several h o u r s I h av e b e e n t a n g l e d in c o m p l e x d e a li n g s wi th a high official of t h e M a r i n e N u t r i e n t s Boa rd; this is an a r m of t h e central
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city g o v e r n m e n t , a n d I m u s t t h e r e f o r e s h o w t h e g r e a t e s t tact, l est G a n f ¡ e l d ' s p l a n k t o n q u o t a s b e a r bi t r a ri l y l o w e r e d by a b u r e a u c r a t ' s s u d d e n p i q u e . T e l e p h o n e c o n t a c t is u n c e r t a in — t h e M a r i n e N ut r i e nt s Board has its h e a d q u a r t e r s in M e l r o s e N e w Port, half a c o n t i n e n t away o n t h e s o u t h e a s t e r n c o a st — a n d t h e line s p u t t e r s a n d bl ur s with d is t o r t i on s t ha t o u r c o m p u t e r s , if t h e m a s t e r p r o g r a m w e r e in o p e r a t i o n , w o u l d n o r mally e ra s e. As w e r e ac h a crisis in t h e n e go t i a t i o n my s u b d e p u t y gives m e a n o t e : "Dis tri ct c a pt ai n w a n t s t o s e e y o u . " " N o t n o w , " I say in silent lip talk. T he h ag g l in g p r o c e e d s . A f ew m i n u t e s later c o m e s a n o t h e r n o t e : "It' s u r g e n t . " I s h a k e my h e a d , b r u s h t h e n o t e f r o m my d e s k . The s u b d e p u t y r et r eats t o t h e o u t e r office, w h e r e I s e e him e n g a g e d in frantic d i s c u s sion with a m a n in t h e g r a y - a n d - g r e e n u ni fo rm of t h e district c ap t a i n' s staff. T h e m e s s e n g e r p o i n t s v e h e m e n t l y at m e . Just t h e n t h e p h o n e line g o e s d e a d . I slam t h e i n s t r u m e n t d o w n a n d call t o t h e m e s s e n g e r , " W h a t is it?" " T h e c a pt a in, sir. To his office at o n c e , p l e a s e . " "Impossible." He displays a w a r r a n t b e a r i n g t h e c a p t ai n ' s seal. " H e r e q u i r e s your immediate p resence." "Tell h i m I h a v e d e l i c a t e b u s i n e s s t o c o m p l e t e , " I reply. " A n o t h e r fifteen m i n u t e s , m a y b e . " He s h a k e s his h e a d . "I a m n o t e m p o w e r e d to allow a d e l a y . " "Is this an a rr es t, t h e n ? " "A s u m m o n s . " " B ut with t h e f o r ce of an a r re s t? " " W i t h t h e f or c e of an ar r est , y e s , " h e tells m e . I s h r u g a n d yield. All b u r d e n s d r o p f ro m me . Let t h e s u b d e p u t y deal with t h e M a r i n e Nu t r i en ts Board; let t h e clerk in t h e o u t e r office d o it, o r n o o n e at all; let t h e w h o l e district starve. I n o l o n g e r c ar e. I a m s u m m o n e d . My r esp on si bi lit ie s are d i s c h a r g e d . I give o v e r my d e s k t o t h e s u b d e p u t y a n d s u m m a ri ze for him, in p e r h a p s a h u n d r e d w o r d s , my intricate h o u r s of n e g o t i a t i o n. All t ha t is s o m e o n e e ls e' s p r o b l e m n o w . The m e s s e n g e r leads m e f r o m t h e b u il di ng into t h e hot , d a n k st re et . The sky is dar k a n d heavy with rain, a n d e vi de nt ly
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it has b e e n r ai ning s o m e w hi l e , for t h e s e w e r s a r e b ac k in g u p a n d a ng r y swirls of m u d d y w a t e r r u n s h i n - d e e p t h r o u g h t h e gu t te rs. The d r a i n a g e s y s t e m , t o o , is c o n t r o l l e d f r o m G a n f¡eld Hol d, a n d m u s t n o w b e failing. W e h ur r y a cr oss t h e n a r r o w plaza f r o n ti n g my office, skirt a g u s h of s e w a g e - l a d e n o u t f l o w , p u s h into a c l o s e - p a c k e d c r o w d of irritable w o r k e r s h e a d i n g for h o m e . The m e s s e n g e r ' s u n i f or m c r e a t e s an invisible s p h e r e of u nt ou c ha b ¡l i t y for us; t h e t h r o n g s pa rt readily a n d c l os e again b e h i n d us. W or dl e s s, ly I a m c o n d u c t e d t o t h e s t o n e - f a c e d b ui l d i ng of t h e district ca pt ai n, a n d qui ckl y t o his office. It is n o unfami li ar pl ace t o m e , b u t c o m i n g h e r e as a p r i s o n e r is q u i t e d if f er en t f r o m a t t e n d i n g a m e e t i n g of t h e district c o u n cil. My s h o u l d e r s a r e s l u m p e d , my e ye s l oo k t o w a r d t h e t h r e a d b a r e c a rp et in g. T h e district c aptai n a p p e a r s . He is a m a n of sixty, silver-haired, u pr i gh t, his eyes f ra nk a n d di rect , his f e a t u r e s reflect ing little of t h e strain his pos i ti on m u s t i m p o s e . He has g o v e r n e d o u r district t e n year s. He g r e e t s m e by n a m e , b u t w i t h o u t w a r m t h , a n d says, “ Yo u ' ve h e a r d n o t h i n g f r o m y o u r w o m a n ? " “ I w o u l d h av e r e p o r t e d it if I h a d . " “ P e r h a p s . P e r ha p s. Have y ou a ny idea w h e r e s h e is?" “ I k n o w o nl y t h e c o m m o n r u m o r s , " I say. " C o n n i n g Town, M o r t o n C ou r t , T h e Mill." " S h e is in n o n e of t h o s e p l a c e s . " “ Ar e y o u r s u r e ? " "I have c o n s u l t e d t h e c a p t ai n s of t h o s e dist rict s, " h e says. " T h e y d e n y a ny k n o w l e d g e of her . O f c o u r s e , o n e has n o r e a s o n to t r u s t t h e i r w o r d , b u t o n t h e o t h e r h a n d w h y w o u l d t h e y b o t h e r t o d e c e i v e m e ? " His e ye s fasten o n m i n e . " W h a t par t did y ou play in t h e s t eal ing of t h e p r o g r a m ? " " N o n e , si r. " " S h e n e v e r s p o k e t o y o u of t r e a s o n a b l e t h i n g s ? " "Never." " T h e r e is s t r o n g f ee li ng in C an f i e ld t h a t a c o n s p i r ac y e x i s te d . " "If so I k n e w n o t h i n g of it." He j u d g e s m e with a p i e rc i n g look. After a l on g p a u s e h e says heavily, " S h e has d e s t r o y e d us, you k n o w . W e can f u n c t i o n
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at t h e p r e s e n t level of o r d e r for a n o t h e r six w e e k s , possibly, w i t h o u t t h e p r o g r a m — if t h e r e is n o p l a g u e , if w e a r e n o t f l o o d e d , if w e ar e n o t o v e r r u n with b a n d i t s f r o m o u t s i d e . After t h a t t h e a c c u m u l a t e d effects o f m a n y m i n o r b r e a k d o w n s will p ar al yze us. W e will fall into c h a o s . W e will s t r a n g l e o n o u r o w n w as t e s , starve, s uf fo c at e, r e v e r t t o savagery, live like be a st s until t h e e n d — w h o k n o ws ? W i t h o u t t h e m a s t e r p r o g r a m w e are lost. W h y d id s h e d o this t o us ? " "I have n o t h e o r i e s , " I say. " S h e k ept h e r o w n c o u n s e l . H e r i n d e p e n d e n c e o f soul is w h a t a t t ra c te d m e t o h e r . " " Ver y well. Let h e r i n d e p e n d e n c e of soul b e w h a t attracts y o u t o h e r n o w . Find h e r a n d b r in g b ac k t h e p r o g r a m . " "F ind her? W h e r e ? " " T h at is for y o u to d i s c o v e r . " "I k n o w n o t h i n g of t h e w o r l d o u t s i d e G a n f ¡ e l d ! " " Yo u will l e a r n , " t h e c a pt ai n says coolly. " T h e r e a r e t h o s e h e r e w h o w o u l d i ndict y o u for t r e a s o n . I s e e n o v a lu e in this. H o w d o e s it h el p us t o p u n i s h you? But w e can u s e y ou . You a r e a c le ve r a n d r e so u r c e f u l m a n ; y ou c an m a k e y o u r way t h r o u g h t h e host ile districts, a n d y ou c an g a t h e r i n f o r ma t io n , a n d y o u c o u l d well s u c c e e d in t r a c ki n g her . If a n y o n e has i n f l u e n c e o v e r her , y o u d o ; if y ou find h e r , y o u p e r h a p s can i n d u c e h e r t o s u r r e n d e r t h e p r o g r a m . No o n e e ls e c o u l d h o p e to a c c o m p l i s h t hat. G o . W e of f er y o u i m m u n i t y f r o m p r o s e c u t ion in r e t u r n for y o u r c o o p e r a t i o n . " T he w o r l d spi ns wildly a b o u t me . My skin b u r n s with s h o c k . "Will I h av e s a f e - c o n d u c t t h r o u g h t h e n e i g h b o r i n g districts?" I ask. "To w h a t e v e r e x t e n t w e c a n a r r a n g e . That will n o t b e m u c h , I f ea r ." "You'll give m e an e s c o r t , t h e n ? Two o r t h r e e m e n ? " " W e feel y o u will travel m o r e effectively a l o n e . A party of several m e n t a k e s o n t h e c h a r a c t e r of an i n va di ng f o r c e ; you w o u l d b e m e t with s u s p i c i o n a n d w o r s e . " " D i p l o m a t i c c r ed e n t i a l s , at least?" "A letter of identi fi cati on, calling o n all c ap t a i ns t o h o n o r 176
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y o u r mis si on a n d t r e a t y o u with c o u r t e s y . " I k n o w h o w m u c h v a l u e s u c h a l et t e r will h av e in Hawk Ne s t o r Fo lks tone. "This f r ig h t e n s m e , " I say. He n o d s , n o t u nk indl y. "I u n d e r s t a n d t ha t. Yet s o m e o n e m u s t s e e k h e r , a n d w h o el se is t h e r e b u t y o u ? W e g r a nt you a da y t o m a k e y o u r p r e p a r a t i o n s . You will d e p a r t o n t h e m o r n i n g after next, a n d G o d h a s t e n y o u r r e t u r n . " V P r e p a ra t io n s . H o w can I p r e p a r e myself? W h a t m a p s s h o u l d I c ol le ct , w h e n my d e s t i n a t i o n is u n k n o w n ? R e tu r n i n g t o t h e office is u n t h i n k a b l e ; I g o st rai ght h o m e , a n d for h o u r s I w a n d e r f r om o n e r o o m t o t h e o t h e r as if I f ace e x e c u t i o n at d a w n . At last I g a t h e r myself a n d fix a small me al, b u t m o s t of it r e m a i n s o n my plate. No f r i en ds call; I call n o o n e . Si nce S¡lena's d i s a p p e a r a n c e my f ri ends have fallen away f ro m m e . I s l e e p p oor l y. D u r i n g t h e ni gh t t h e r e a r e h o a r s e s h o u t s a n d shrill a la r ms in t h e s t r ee t ; I learn f r o m t h e m o r n i n g n e w s c a s t t h a t five m e n of C o n n i n g T o w n , h e r e t o loot, h a d b e e n s e i z ed by o n e of t h e n e w vigilante g r o u p s t h a t have r e p l a c e d t h e police m a c h i n e s a n d w e r e s u m m a r i l y p u t t o d e a t h . I find n o c h e e r in t ha t, t h i n k i n g t h a t I m i g h t b e in C o n n i n g T ow n in a day o r so. W h a t c l u es t o S¡lena's r o u t e ? I ask to s p e a k with t h e g u a r d f ro m w h o m s h e w a n g l e d e n tr y i nto Ga nf ie ld Hold. H e has b e e n a p r i s o n e r e v e r s i n c e ; t h e c ap ta i n is t o o b u s y t o d e c i d e his fate, a n d h e l a n g u i s h e s m e a n w h i l e . H e is a small, t h i c k - b o d i e d m a n with s t u b b l y r ed hair a n d a s we at y f o r e h e a d ; his eyes a r e b r i g h t wit h a n g e r a n d his nostrils q ui ve r. " W h a t is t h e r e t o say?" h e d e m a n d s . "I w a s o n d u t y at t h e Hol d. She c a m e in. I h ad n e v e r s e e n h e r b e f o r e , t h o u g h 1 k n e w s h e m u s t b e high ca ste . H e r cl oa k w as o p e n . S h e s e e m e d n a k e d b e n e a t h it. She w a s in a stat e of e x c i t e m e n t . " " W h a t did s h e tell y o u ? " " T ha t s h e d e s i r e d m e . T h o s e w e r e h e r first w o r d s . " Yes. 177
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I c o u l d s e e S¡lena d o i n g t hat , t h o u g h I h a d difficulty in imagining h e r l o n g , s l e n d e r f o r m e n f o l d e d in t h i s s q u a t little m a n ' s e m b r a c e . " S h e said s h e k n e w of m e a n d was e a g e r for me t o have h e r . " "And then?" "I s e a l e d t h e gat e. W e w e n t t o an i n n e r r o o m w h e r e t h e r e is a cot. It was a q u i e t t i me of day; I t h o u g h t n o h ar m w o u l d c o m e . S h e d r o p p e d h e r cloak. H e r b o d y — " " N e v e r m i n d h e r b o d y . " I c o u l d s e e it all t o o well in t h e e y e of my m i n d , t h e s l e ek t h i gh s , t h e t a u t belly, t h e small high b r e as t s , t h e c a s c a d e of c h o c o l a t e hair falling to h e r s h o u l d e r s . " W h a t di d you talk a b o u t ? Did s h e say a n y t h i n g of a political kind? S o m e sl og an , s o m e w o r d s a ga in st t h e g o v e r n ment?" " N o t h i n g . W e lay t o g e t h e r n a k e d a whi le , onl y f o n d l i n g e a c h o t h e r . T h e n s h e said s h e ha d a d r u g with her , o n e t h a t w o u l d e n h a n c e t h e s e n s a t i o n s of love t e n f o l d . It was a d a r k p o w d e r . I d r a n k it in w a t e r ; s h e d r a n k it also, or s e e m e d to. Instantly I was a s l e e p . W h e n I a w o k e t h e Hold was in u p r o a r a n d I was a p r i s o n e r . " He g l o w er s at m e . "I s h o u l d h av e s u s p e c t e d a trick f r om t h e start. S u c h w o m e n d o n o t h u n g e r for m e n like m e . H o w did I e v e r inj ure y o u ? W h y did y ou c h o o s e m e t o b e t h e victim of y o u r s c h e m e ? " " H e r s c h e m e , " I say. " N o t m i n e . I h a d n o par t in it. Her m ot i ve is a my st er y to me . If I c o u l d d i sc o ve r w h e r e s h e has g o n e , I w o u l d s e e k h e r a n d wr i ng a n s w e r s f r om he r . Any help y o u c o u l d give m e mi gh t e a r n y o u a p a r d o n a n d y o u r f r e e d o m . " "I k n o w n o t h i n g , " h e says sullenly. " S h e c a m e in, s h e s n a r e d m e , s h e d r u g g e d m e , s h e s t ol e t h e p r o g r a m . " " Th i nk . Not a w o r d ? Possibly s h e m e n t i o n e d t h e n a m e of s o m e o t h e r district. " "Nothing." A p a w n is all h e is, i n n o c e n t , us eles s. As I leave h e cries o u t t o m e t o i n t e r c e d e for him, b u t w h a t ca n I do? " Y o u r w o m a n r u i n e d m e ! " h e roars. " S h e may h av e r u i n e d us all," I reply. 178
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At m y r e q u e s t a d i s t r i c t p r o s e c u t o r a c c o m p a n i e s m e t o Silena's a p a r t m e n t , w h i c h has b e e n u n d e r official seal si nce h e r d i s a p p e a r a n c e . Its c o n t e n t s h a v e b e e n t h o r o u g h l y e x a m i n e d , b u t m a y b e t h e r e is s o m e c l u e I a l o n e w o u l d n ot ic e. Entering, I feel a s h a r p p a n g of loss, for t h e sight of Silena's p o s s e s s i o n s r e m i n d s m e of h a p p i e r t i m e s . T h e s e t h i ng s ar e painfully familiar t o m e : h e r n e a t array of b o o k s , h e r c lo t hi ng , h e r f u r ni s hi ngs , h e r b e d . I k n e w h e r o nl y e l e v e n w e e k s , s he wa s my m o nt h - w ¡ f e for o nl y t w o ; I h a d n o t real ized s h e had c o m e t o m e a n s o m u c h t o m e s o quickly. W e l oo k a r o u n d , t h e p r o s e c u t o r a n d I. T he b o o k s testify t o t h e agility of he r r estless mi nd : little l¡ghtf¡ction, mainly w o r k s of s e r i o u s history, an al yse s of social p r o b l e m s , f o re c as t s of c o n d i t i o n s t o c o m e . H o l m a n , T h e Era o f t h e W o r ld City. S a w t e l l e , M e g a l o p o l i s T r iu m p h a n t. Doסadis, The N e w W o rld o f Urban Man. Hegg e b e n d , Fifty Billion Lives. Mar ks, Calcutta Is Everywhere. Chas¡n, Th e N e w C o m m u n i t y . I t a k e a f e w of t h e b o o k s d o w n , f o n d l i n g t h e m as t h o u g h t h e y w e r e S¡lena. M a n y t i me s w h e n I h a d s p e n t an e v e n i n g h e r e s h e r e a c h e d for o n e of t h o s e b o o k s , Sawt el le o r H e g g e b e n d o r Ma rks o r Ch a si n , t o r ead m e a p a s s a g e t h a t a mpl if ie d s o m e p o i n t s h e wa s m a ki ng . Idly I t u r n p a ge s . D o z e n s of p a r a g r a p h s a re u n d e r s c o r e d with fine, p re c is e lines, a n d l e n g t h y marginal c o m m e n t s a r e a b u n d a n t . “ W e ' v e a n al y z e d all of t h a t for p o s s i b l e s i gn if i ca nc e, " t h e p r o s e c u t o r r e m ar k s. " T h e o n l y t h i n g w e ' v e c o n c l u d e d is t h a t s h e t h i n ks t h e w o r l d is t o o c r o w d e d for c o m f o r t . " A r a t c he t i n g laugh. “ As w h o d o e s n ' t ? " He p o i n t s t o a st ack o f g r e e n - b o u n d p a m p h l e t s at t h e e n d o f t h e l o w e r shelf. " T h e s e , o n t h e o t h e r h a n d , may b e useful in y o u r s e ar c h. Do y o u k n o w a n yt h i n g about them?" Th e stack c on s is t s of n i n e c o p i e s of s o m e t h i n g called W alden Three: a U t o p i a n fantasy, a p p a r e n t l y , s et in an idyllic land of s t r e a m s a n d f or es ts . T h e b o o k l e t s ar e unfami liar t o m e ; Silena m u s t h av e o b t a i n e d t h e m recentl y. W h y n i n e c op ie s ? Was s h e a ct i n g as a di st r ib ut or ? T h ey b e a r t h e i mp r in t of a p u b l is h in g h o u s e in Kingston. C a n fi e ld a n d Kingston s e v e r e d t r a d e rela 179
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t i o ns l o n g a g o ; material p u b l i s h e d t h e r e is u n c o m m o n h er e. " I' v e n e v e r s e e n t h e m , " I say. " W h e r e d o you t h i n k s h e g ot them?" " T h e r e are t h r e e main r o u t e s for su b v e rs iv e lite ra ture o ri gi n at in g in Ki ngston. O n e is— " "I s this p a m p h l e t s u bv e r s i v e , t h e n ? " " O h , ver y m u c h so. It a r g u e s for c o m p l e t e reversal of t h e social t r e n d s of t h e last h u n d r e d years. As I w as saying, t h e r e a re t h r e e mai n r o u t e s for s u b v e r s i v e l it er at ur e o r i g i na ti ng in Kingston. W e h ave t r a c e d o n e c ha i n of d is t r i b ut i o n r u n n i n g b y w a y of W¡sleigh a n d C e d a r Mall, a n o t h e r t h r o u g h O l d G r o ve , Ha wk Ne st , a n d C o n n i n g T o w n , a n d t h e thir d via Parley Cl o se a n d T h e Mill. It is p la usi bl e t h a t y o u r w o m a n is in Kingston n o w , havi ng t r a v el e d a l o n g o n e of t h e s e u n d e r g r o u n d d i s t r i b u t ion r o u t e s , s h e l t e r e d by h e r fell ow s u b v e r si ve s all t h e way. But w e h ave n o way of c o n f i r m i n g t h i s . " He smil es emptily. " S h e c o u l d b e in a ny of t h e o t h e r c o m m u n i t i e s a l o n g t h e t h r e e r o u t e s . O r in n o n e of t h e m . " "I s h o u l d t h i n k of Kingst on, t h o u g h , as my ul t i ma t e goal, until I learn a n y t h i n g to t h e c on tr ar y. Is t h a t right?" " W h a t e ls e can y o u d o ? " " W h a t e lse, i n d e e d ? I m u s t s e a r c h at r a n d o m t h r o u g h an u n k n o w n n u m b e r of host ile districts, havi ng n o c l u e o t h e r t h a n t h e v a g u e o n e implicit in t h e pl ac e of origin o f t h e s e n i n e b o o k l e t s , w hi l e t i m e ticks o n a n d Ga nf ie ld slips d e e p e r day by da y into c o n f u s i o n . Th e p r o s e c u t o r ' s office s u p p l i e s m e with useful t h i n g s : m a p s , letters of in tr o d u c tio n , a c o m m u t e r 's p a s s p o rt that sh o u ld e n a b l e m e t o c ro s s at least s o m e district lines u n m o l e s t e d , a n d an a s s o r t m e n t of local c u r r e n c i e s as well as b a n k n o t e s i s su ed by t h e cent ral b a n k a n d t h e r e f o r e valid in m o s t districts. Against my w i s h e s I a m gi ven also a w e a p o n — a small heatp¡stol— a n d in a d d i ti on a c a p s u l e t h a t I c an swa ll ow in t h e e v e n t t h a t a q u ic k a n d e as y d e a t h b e c o m e s d e s i r ab l e. As t h e final st ag e in my p r e p a r a t i o n I s p e n d an h o u r c o n f e r r i n g with a s e c r e t a g e n t , n o w r e ti re d, w h o s e c a r e e r of e s p i o n a g e t o o k him 180
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safely into h u n d r e d s o f c o m m u n i t i e s as far away as T h r e a d m u i r a n d Re ed M e a d o w . W h a t advi ce d o e s h e give s o m e o n e a b o u t to try t o g e t a cr os s ? “ Ma in ta in y o u r p o i s e / ' h e says. “ Be c o n f i d e n t a n d s el f- as s ur ed , as t h o u g h y o u b e l o n g in w h a t e v e r place y o u f i n d y o u r s e l f . N e v e r s l i n k . L o o k all m e n in t h e e y e . H o w e v e r , say n o m o r e t h a n is n e c es s a r y . Be wa tc hf ul at all t i me s . D o n ' t relax y o u r g u a r d . " S u c h p r e c e p t s I c o u l d have e v o l v ed w i t h o u t his aid. He has n o t h i n g in t h e n a t u r e of specific hints for survival. Each district, h e says, p r e s e n t s u n i q u e p r o b l ems, c o n s t a n t l y c h a n g i n g ; n o t h i n g c an b e a n t i c i p a t e d , e v e r y t h i n g m u s t b e m e t as it arises. H o w c o m f o r t i n g ! At nightfall I g o t o t h e s oul f a t h e r ' s h o u s e , in t h e s h a d o w of Ganf¡el d T o w e r. To leave w i t h o u t a b le s si ng s e e m s u n wi s e . But t h e r e is s o m e t h i n g stagy a n d u n s p o n t a n e o u s a b o u t my visit, a n d my faith flees as I e n t e r . In t h e d im a n t e c h a m b e r I light t h e n i n e c a n d l e s , I p l u c k t h e five b l a d e s of grass fr om t h e c e r e m o n i a l vase, I d o t h e o t h e r p r o p e r ritual t h in g s, b u t my spirit r e m a i n s chi l led a n d hol l o w, a n d I a m u n a b l e to pray. T he soul f a t h er himself, h av in g b e e n t ol d of my m is s io n, g ra nt s m e a u d i e n c e — g a u n t old m a n wi th i m p e n e t r a b l e e y e s s e t in d e e p b on y rims— and favors m e with a ge ntle feather-light e m b r a c e . " G o in s a f e t y , " h e m u r m u r s . " G o d w a t c h e s o v e r y o u . " I wish I felt s u r e of t hat . G o i n g h o m e , I t a k e t h e m o s t r o u n d a b o u t p o s s i b l e r o u t e , as if trying t o d r i n k in as m u c h of Ganf ¡el d as I c a n o n my last night. T h e d i m i n i s h i n g pas t flows t h r o u g h m e like a river r u n n i n g dry. My b i r t h p l a c e , my s c h o ol , t h e s t r e et s w h e r e I p la ye d , t h e d o r m i t o r y w h e r e I s p e n t my a d o l e s c e n c e , t h e h o m e of my first m o n t h - w i f e . Farewell. Fare well. T o m o r r o w I g o a c r os s . I r e t u r n to my a p a r t m e n t a l o n e ; o n c e m o r e my s l e e p is fitful. An h o u r a fter d a w n I find myself, a s t o n i s h e d by it, wai ti ng in line a m o n g t h e c o m m u t e r s at t h e m o u t h of t h e t ra ns it t u b e , b o u n d f or C o n n i n g Town. A n d so my c r o s s i n g b egi ns . VI A b o a r d t h e t u b e - t r a i n n o o n e s p e a k s . Faces ar e t e n s e ; b o d i e s 181
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a re held rigid in t h e plastic seats. Oc c as i on a ll y s o m e o n e o n t h e o t h e r s id e of t h e aisle g la n ce s at m e as t h o u g h w o n d e r i n g w h o this n e w c o m e r to t h e c o m m u t e r g r o u p may b e , b u t his eyes q ui c kl y slide a wa y as I t a k e n oti c e. I k n o w n o n e of t h e s e c o m m u t e r s , t h o u g h t h e y m u s t have d w e l t in Ganf¡eld as l on g as I; t h e i r lives h av e n e v e r i n t e r s e c t e d m i n e b e f o r e . Engi neer s, m e r c h a n t s , d i p l o m a t s , w h a t e v e r — t h e i r c a r e e r s a r e t ied t o d is tricts o t h e r t h a n t h e i r o w n . It is o n e of t h e a n o m a l i e s of o u r e v e r m o r e f r a g m e n t e d a n d stratified soci et y t h a t s o m e r egul ar c o n t a c t still survives b e t w e e n c o m m u n i t y a nd c o m m u n i t y ; a cert ain n u m b e r of p e o p l e m u s t j o u r n e y e a c h da y t o out lyi ng districts, w h e r e th e y w ork e n c a p s u la te d , isolated, a m o n g u n f ri e nd ly s tr a ng e rs . W e p l u n g e e a s t w a r d at u n i m a g i n a b l e s p e e d . Surely w e a re p a st t h e b o u n d a r i e s of Ganf¡eld by n o w a n d u n d e r alien t e r ritory. A g l o w i n g sign o n t h e wall of t h e car a n n o u n c e s o u r r o u t e : C O N N I N G T O W N — HAWK NEST— OLD GROVE— KI NGSTON— FOLKSTONE— PARLEY CLOSE— BUDLEIGH — CEDAR MALL— THE MILL— M O R T O N C O U RT — C A N FIELD, a w i d e l o o p t h r o u g h o u r m o s t i m m e d i a t e n e i g h b o r s . I try t o visualize t h e s e p a r a t e links in this ch ai n of districts, e a c h a c o m m u n i t y of t h r e e o r f o u r h u n d r e d t h o u s a n d loyal a n d patriotic citizens, e a c h wit h its o w n special t o n e , its fiavor, its distinctive quality, its a p p a r a t u s of g o v e r n m e n t , its c u s t o m s a n d rituals. But I ca n i ma gi ne t h e m m e r e l y as a c l u s te r of Ganf ¡el ds, ever y pl ace very m u c h like t h e o n e I have j ust left. I k n o w this is n o t so. T h e world-cit y is n o h o m o g e n e o u s c o l lection of u n i for mi tie s, a global b u n d l e of i n d is t i n g ui s ha b le s u b u r b s . No, t h e r e is i n c r ed ib l e diversity, a h o s t of u n i q u e u r b a n c o r e s b o u n d by c o m m o n n e e d into a fragile unity. No m a s t e r plan b r o u g h t t h e m into b e i n g ; e a c h e v o lv e d at a s e p a rate p o i n t in t i m e t o s e rv e t h e n e ce ss i t ie s of a par ti cul ar p u r p o s e . This c o m m u n i t y s pr awl s graceful l y a l o n g a c ur v i ng river, t hat o n e bol dl y m o u n t s t h e s l o p e s of stark hills; h e r e t h e prevailing a r c h i t e c t u r e reflects an easy, g e n t l e c limate, t h e r e it war s with u n fr i e nd ly n a t u r e ; for m follows t o p o g r a p h y a n d local func182
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t¡ on, c r e a ti n g individuality. T he w o r l d is a r i c h n e s s — w h y t h e n d o I s e e only t e n t h o u s a n d Ganf iel ds? O f c o u r s e it is n o t so s i mp l e . W e a re c a u g h t in t h e t e n s i o n b e t w e e n f or ce s t ha t e n c o u r a g e d i s ti nc t iv ene ss a n d f o r c es t hat c o m p e l all c o m m u n i t i e s t o w a r d ¡dent¡cality. Cent r if ugal f or ce s b r o k e d o w n t h e h u g e a n c i e n t cities, t h e L o n d o n s a n d Tokyos a n d N e w Yorks, into n e i g h b o r h o o d c o m m u n i t i e s t h a t s e i z ed q u a s i - a u t o n o m o u s p o w e rs. T h o se giant cities w e re to o un w¡ eldly t o survive; d e ns i t y of p o p u l a t i o n , m a k i n g l o n g d i s t a n c e t r a n s p o r t u n f e a s i b l e a n d c o m m u n i c a t i o n di ffi cul t, s h a tte r e d th e u rb an fabric, d e s tr o y e d th e a u th o rity of th e c entr al g o v e r n m e n t , a n d left t h e closel y knit smal l-scale subci t y as t h e only viable unit. Two d y n a m i c a n d c o n t r a d i c t o r y p r o c e s s es n o w a s s e r t e d t h e m s e l v e s . Pride a n d t h e q u e s t for local a d v a n t a g e led e a c h c o m m u n i t y t o w a r d s p e ci al i z a ti on : this o n e a c e n t e r primarily of industrial p r o d u c t i o n , this o n e d e v o t e d t o a d v a n c e d e d u c a t i o n , this t o f i n a nc e , this t o t h e p r o c e s s i n g of raw mat eri al s, this t o w h o l e s a l e m a r k e t i n g of c o m m o d i t i e s , this t o retail d i s tr i bu ti o n, a n d s o o n , t h e s h a p e a n d t e x t u r e of e a c h district d e f i n e d by its c h o s e n f u nc t io n . A n d ye t t h e n e w d e c e n t r a l i z a t i o n r e q u i r e d a high d e g r e e of r e d u n d a n c y , d u p l ic a ti o n of g o v e r n m e n t a l s t r u c t u r e s , of utilities, of c o m m u nity s er vi ces ; f or its o w n safety e a c h district felt t h e n e e d to t r a n s f o r m itself int o a m i c r o c o s m of t h e f o r m e r full city. Ideally w e s h o u l d h a ve h o v e r e d in p e r fe c t b a l a n c e b e t w e e n spe ci al iz a t i o n a n d r e d u n d a n c y , all c o m m u n i t i e s s tr i vi n g t o fulfill t h e n e e d s of all o t h e r c o m m u n i t i e s with t h e least p o s s ib l e ov er l ap a n d w a s t e of r e s o u r c e s ; in fact o u r h u m a n frailty has b r o u g h t into b e i n g t h e s e i rr ever si bl e t r e n d s of rivalry a n d irrational fear, d i vi ding district f r o m district, so t ha t a ga in st o u r o w n selfi n t e r es t w e s e v e r y ea r af ter y ea r o u r b o n d s of i n t e r d e p e n d e n c e a n d s t u b b o r n l y s e e k self-sufficiency at t h e district level. Since t h i s is i m p o s s i b l e , o u r l iv es g r o w c o n s t a n t l y m o r e i m p o v e r i s h e d . In t h e e n d , all districts will b e t h e s a m e a n d w e will have c r e a t e d a w o r l d of pa t he ti c, l impi ng Ga nf ields, d e v o i d of g r a c e, l acki ng in variety.
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So. T h e t u be - t r a ¡ n halts. This is C o n n i n g T o w n . I a m a cr os s t h e first district line. I m a k e my exit in a file of s o l e m n - f a c e d c o m m u t e r s . Imit at ing t h e m , I a p p r o a c h a collossal C y c l o p e a n s c a n n i n g m a c h i n e a n d p r e s e n t my p a s s p o r t . It is u n m a r k e d by visas; t h e i r s a r e g a u d y with s c o r e s of t h e m . I t r e m b l e , b u t t h e m a c h ¡ n e a c c e p t s m e a n d s l a m s d o w n a s t a m p t h a t f l uo r e s c e s a brilliant s h i m m e r i n g c r i m s o n a ga ins t t h e p a l e - l a v e n d e r p a ge : • DISTRICT OF C O N N I N G T O W N • • ENTRY VISA • • 2 4 - H O U R VALIDITY •
Da t e d t o t h e h o u r , m i n u t e , s e c o n d . W e l c o m e , s tr a n g e r , b u t g et o u t of t o w n b e f o r e s un r i s e ! Up t h e p u r r i n g r a m p , i nt o t h e s tr ee t. Bright m o r n i n g su nl i gh t pries a p a r t t h e slim, s o o t y, c l o s e - r a n k e d t o w e r s of C o n n i n g T ow n. T h e air is cool a n d s w e e t , s t r a n g e t o m e af ter s o ma n y s w el t e r i n g days in p r o g r a m l e s s , d e m e c h a n i z e d Ganf¡el d. D o e s o u r foul air drift a cr os s t h e b o r d e r a n d o f f e n d t h e m ? Sullen e ye s s t u d y m e ; t h o s e a b o u t m e k n o w m e f or an o u t s i d e r . Their c l o t hi n g is alien in style, p i n c h e d in at t h e s h o u l d e r s , flaring at t h e waist. I find mysel f a d o p t i n g an i n a n e smi le in r e s p o n s e t o t h e i r d o u r glares. For an h o u r I walk aiml essl y t h r o u g h t h e d o w n t o w n s e ct io n until my first fears me l t a n d a c o m i c c o c k i n e s s t a k e s p o s s e s s i o n of m e : I p r e t e n d t o myself t h a t I a m a native, a n d e n j o y t h e flimsy i m p o s t u r e . This pl ace is n o t m u c h u nl ike Ganf¡eld, ye t n o t h i n g is q u i t e t h e s a m e . T h e s ide wa l ks a r e w i d e r ; t h e s tr e et l a mps h av e s l e n d e r a r c h i n g n e c k s i n s t e a d of a n g u l a r o n e s ; t h e fire h yd r a n t s ar e g r e e n a n d go ld, n o t b l u e a n d o r a n g e . The poli ce m a c h i n e s h a v e flatter d o m e s t h a n o u r s , r i n g e d with t e n o r t we lv e s py -e ye s w h e r e o u r s h av e six o r e ight . Different, dif fer ent , all different. T h r e e t i me s I a m ha lt ed by p ol ic e m a c h i n e s . I p r o d u c e my p a s s p o r t , display my visa, a m a l l o w e d to c o n t i n u e . So far g et ting a cr os s has b e e n e a si e r t h a n I i ma g i n e d . No o n e m o l e s t s m e 184
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h e r e . I s u p p o s e I l ook h a r ml e s s. W h y d id I t h i n k my f o r e i g n n e s s a l o n e w o u l d lead t h e s e p e o p l e t o a tta ck me ? Ganf¡el d is n o t at w a r wit h its n e i g h b o r s , after all. Drifting e a s t w a r d in s e a r c h of a b o o k s t o r e , I pass t h r o u g h a s h a b b y resi dent ial n e i g h b o r h o o d a n d t h r o u g h a z o n e o f d i s mal fact ori es b e f o r e I r e ac h an a r e a of small s h o p s . T h e n in late a f t e r n o o n I d i sc o ve r t h r e e b o o k s t o r e s o n t h e s a m e block, b u t t h e y a r e a nt is e pt ic p l aces , n o t t h e s o r t t h a t m i g h t carry s u b v e r s i v e p r o p a g a n d a like W a ld e n Three. T h e first t w o are w h o ll y a u t o m a t e d , bl an k- wa ll ed c h a r g e - p l a t e - a n d - s c a n n e r o p e r a t i o n s . T he th ir d has a h u m a n clerk, a m a n of a b o u t thirty, wi th d r o o p i n g y e l low m o u s t a c h ¡ o s a n d alert b l u e e ye s. He r e c o g n i z e s t h e style of my c l o t h i n g a n d says, " G a nf ¡ el d , e h ? Lot of t r o u b l e o v e r t h e r e . " "You've heard?" " J us t stories. C o m p u t e r b r e a k d o w n , isn't it?" I n o d . " S o m e t h i n g like t h a t . " " N o p ol ice, n o g a r b a g e r e mo v a l , n o w e a t h e r c o nt r o l , hardly a n y t h i n g w o r k i n g — t h a t 's w h a t t h e y s ay. " H e s e e m s n e i t h e r s u r p r i s e d n o r d i s t u r b e d t o have an o u t l a n d e r in his s h o p . His m a n n e r is a m i a b l e a n d r el axed. Is h e f ishing for data a b o u t o u r vulnerability, t h o u g h ? I m u s t b e careful n o t t o tell him a n y t h i n g t h a t m i g h t b e u s e d a g a i n s t us. But e v i d e n t l y t h e y a l re ady k n o w e v e r y t h i n g h e r e . He says, "It' s a little like d r o p p i n g b a c k into t h e S t o n e Age f or y o u p e o p l e , I g u e s s . It m u s t b e a real t r a u m a t i c t h i n g . " " W e ' r e c o p i n g , " I say, stiffly casual. " H o w did it h a p p e n , a ny w a y? " I gave him a wa ry s h r u g . " I ' m n o t s u r e a b o u t t h a t . " Still r eve al in g n o t h i n g . But t h e n s o m e t h i n g in his t o n e of a m o m e n t b e f o r e c a t c h e s m e b e l a t e d l y a n d n e u t ra l i z es s o m e of t h e reflex ive a u t o m a t i c s u s p i c i o n wi th w h i c h I h av e m e t his q u e s t i o n s . I g l a nc e a r o u n d . No o n e e ls e in t h e s h o p . I let s o m e t h i n g c o n spiratorial c r e e p i nto my vo i ce a n d say, "I t mi g ht n o t e v e n b e s o t r a u ma t i c , actually, o n c e w e g e t u s e d to it. I m e a n , t h e r e o n c e w a s a t i m e w h e n w e d i d n ' t rely so heavily o n m a c h i n e s 185
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t o d o o u r t h i n k i n g for us, a n d w e sur vived, a n d e v e n m a n a g e d p re tty well. I was r e a d i n g a little b o o k last w e e k t h a t s e e m e d t o b e saying w e m i g h t profit by trying t o r e t u r n t o t h e old w ay of life. Bo ok p u b l i s h e d in Ki ng st on. " " W a l d e n T h r e e .” N ot a q u e s t i o n b u t a s t a t e m e n t . "T ha t 's it." My e y e s q u e r y his. " Y o u ' v e r ead it?" " S e e n it." "A lot of s e n s e in t ha t b o o k , I t h i n k . " He smi le s warml y. "I t h i n k so t oo . You g e t m u c h Kingston stuff o v e r in Ga nf i e l d? " " Ve ry little, actual ly. " "N ot much here, either." " Bu t t h e r e ' s s o m e . " " S o m e , y e s , " h e says. Have I s t u m b l e d u p o n a m e m b e r of S¡lena's u n d e r g r o u n d m o v e m e n t ? I say eagerl y, " Yo u k n o w , m a y b e y ou c o u l d hel p me meet some people w ho— " "No." "No?" " N o . " His e ye s a r e still f ri endl y b u t his f ace is t e n s e . " T h e r e ' s n o t h i n g like t h a t a r o u n d h e r e , " h e says, his voi ce s u d d e n l y flat a n d r e m o t e . " Y o u ' d h ave to g o o v e r into H aw k N e s t . " " I ' m t ol d t ha t t h a t 's a nasty p l a c e . " " N e v e r t h e l e s s , Ha wk N e st is w h e r e y o u w a n t t o go . Nat e a n d Holly B o r d e n ' s s h o p , j ust off Box S t r e e t . " A b r up tl y his m a n n e r shifts to o n e of e x a g g e r a t e d b la n d c le r k ¡ s h n e s s . " A n y t h i n g el s e I c an d o for y o u , sir? If y o u ' r e i n t e r e s t e d in s u p e r n o v e l s w e ' v e g o t a c o u p l e of g o o d n e w d o u b l e - a m p l i f i e d c a ss e t t e s , just in. P e r h a p s I c a n s h o w y o u — " " T h a n k y o u , n o . " I smi le, s h a k e my h e a d , leave t h e st or e. A p ol ic e m a c h i n e waits o u t s i d e . Its d o m e r ot a te s ; e y e after e ye s ca ns m e intently; finally its r e s o n a n t vo i ce says, " Yo u r p a s s p o r t , p l e a s e . " This r o u t i n e is familiar by n o w . I p r o d u c e t h e d o c u m e n t . T h r o u g h t h e b o o k s h o p w i n d o w I s e e t h e clerk bleakly w a t c h i n g . T h e p ol ic e m a c h i n e says, " W h a t is y o u r pl ace of r e s i d e n c e in C o n n i n g T o w n ? " 186
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"I h ave n o n e . I'm h e r e o n a t w e n t y - f o u r - h o u r visa." " W h e r e will y o u s p e n d t h e night ?" "In a hotel , I s u p p o s e . " "Please show your room confirmation." "I h a v e n ' t m a d e a r r a n g e m e n t s y e t , " I tell it. A l on g m o m e n t of s il e nc e ; t h e m a c h i n e is c o n f e r r i n g with its c e nt r al , n o d o u b t , keyi ng into t h e m a s t e r p r o g r a m of C o n n i ng T o w n f or i n s t r u c t io n s. At l e n g t h it says, " Yo u a re a dv i se d t o o b t a i n a legit imat e r es er va ti on a n d display it t o a m o n i t o r at t h e earli est o p p o r t u n i t y wit hi n t h e next f o u r h o u r s . Failure t o d o s o will resul t in ca n c el l at i on of y o u r visa a n d i m m e d i a t e e x p u l s i o n f r om C o n n i n g T o w n . " S o m e o m i n o u s clicks c o m e f r o m t h e d e p t h s of t h e m a c h i n e . " Yo u a r e n o w u n d e r formal s u r v ei l l a n c e , " it a n n o u n c e s . Br immi ng wit h q u e s t i o n s , I r e tu r n hastily t o t h e b o o k s h o p . T he cler k is d i s p l e a s e d t o s e e m e . A n y o n e w h o attracts m o n i t o r s t o his s h o p — " m o n i t o r s " is w h a t t h e y call p oli c e m a c h i n e s h e r e , it s e e m s — is u n w e l c o m e . " C a n you tell m e h o w t o r e ac h t h e n e a r e s t d e c e n t h o t e l ? " I ask. " Yo u w o n ' t find o n e . " " N o d e c e n t h o te l s? " " N o h ote ls . N o n e w h e r e y ou c o u l d ge t a r o o m , anyway. W e have o nl y t w o o r t h r e e t r a n s i e n t h o u s e s a n d a c c o m m o d a t io ns a r e a l l oc at ed m o n t h s in a d v a n c e t o r e gu la r c o m m u t e r s . " " D o e s th e m onit or k now that?" "O f course." " W h e r e a r e s t r a n g e r s s u p p o s e d to stay, t h e n ? " T he cler k s hr u g s . " T h e r e ' s n o s tr uc tur al p r o g r a m h e r e for s t r a n g e r s as s u c h . T h e r eg u l a r c o m m u t e r s have r e gul a r a r r a n g e m e n t s . U n a u t h o r i z e d i n t r u d e r s d o n ' t b e l o n g h e r e at all. You fall s o m e w h e r e in b e t w e e n , I ima gin e. T h e r e ' s n o legal way for y o u t o s p e n d t h e ni gh t in C o n n i n g T o w n . " " B ut my visa— " "Even s o . " " I' d b e t t e r g o o n into H aw k Nest, I s u p p o s e . " "It' s late. Yo u ' ve m i s s e d t h e last t ub e- t ra ¡n . Yo u' ve go t n o 187
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c h o i c e b u t t o stay, un le s s y ou w a n t t o try a b o r d e r c r o s s i n g o n f o o t in t h e d ar k . I w o u l d n ' t r e c o m m e n d t h a t . " "Stay? But w h e r e ? " " S l e e p in t h e s t r ee t. If y o u ' r e lucky t h e m o n i t o r s will leave y ou a l o n e . " " S o m e q u i e t b a c k alley, I s u p p o s e . " " N o , " h e says. "You s l e e p in a n o u t - o f - th e -w a y p la ce a n d you'll s ur e ly g e t sliced u p by ni gh t b a ndi t s . G o t o o n e of t h e d e s i g n a t e d s l e e p i n g st reet s. In t h e m i d d l e of a big c r o w d you m i gh t j us t g o u n n o t i c e d , e v e n t h o u g h y o u ' r e u n d e r s ur veil l a n c e . " As h e s p e a k s h e m o v e s a b o u t t h e s h o p , c lo s i ng it d o w n for t h e night. He l o ok s restl ess a n d u n c o m f o r t a b l e . I t a k e o u t my m a p of C o n n i n g T ow n a n d h e s h o w s m e w h e r e t o go. T h e m a p is s o m e y ea rs o u t of d a t e, a p p a r e n t l y ; h e c o r r ec t s it wi t h i rritable s w i p e s of his penci l. W e leave t h e s h o p t o g e t h e r . I invite him t o c o m e with m e t o s o m e r e s t a u r a n t as my g u e s t , b u t h e looks at m e as if I carry p la g ue . " G o o d - b y , " h e says. " G o o d l uc k ." VII A lo ne , a p a r t f r o m t h e ha nd fu l of o t h e r d i n e r s , I t a k e my e v e n i n g meal at a s q u a l i d, diml y lit a u t o m a t e d ca fe te ri a at t h e e d g e of d o w n t o w n . Silent m a c h i n e s of fer m e t hi n acrid s o u p , pale s p o n g y b re a d , and a le a d e n stew c o n ta in in g lum py i n g r e d i e n t s of u n d e t e r m i n a b l e origin, for w h i c h I pay with yel l o w p la st i c c o u n t e r s o f C o n n i n g T o w n c u r r e n c y . E m e r g i n g u n d e l i g h t e d , I o b s e r v e a r e d d i s h g lo w in t h e w e s t e r n sky. It may b e a lovely s u n s e t o r , f o r all I k n o w , it m a y b e a sign t h a t Ganf¡eld is b u r n i n g . I l oo k a b o u t for m o n i t o r s . My four h o u r g r ac e p e r i o d has nearl y e x p i r e d . I m u s t d i s a p p e a r s hor tly i nto a t h r o n g . It s e e m s t o o ear ly for s l e e p , b u t I a m o n l y a f ew b loc ks f ro m t h e pl ace w h e r e t h e b o o k s h o p cl er k s u g g e s t e d I s h o u l d pass t h e night , a n d I g o t o it. Just as well; w h e n I r e ac h it— a w i d e pl aza b o r d e r e d by gray bu i ld i ng s of o r n a t e f a c a d e — I find it a lr ea dy filling u p wit h s t r e e t - s l e e p e r s . T h e r e m u s t b e e i g ht h u n d r e d o f t h e m , m e n , w o m e n , family g r o u p s , 188
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s ett ling d o w n in little s q u a r e s of c o b b l e d te rr ito ry t ha t a re o b v i o us l y c l a i m ed ni ght af ter ni ght u n d e r s o m e s y s te m of s q u a t t e r ' s rights. O t h e r s c o ns t a n t l y arrive, f lowi ng i nwa rd f r om t h e plaza's t h r e e e n t r a n c e s , f in d i ng t h e i r p laces , laying o u t f o am c u s h i o n s or m o u n d s of c l o t h in g as t h e i r m a t t r e s s e s . It is a f riendly c r o w d ; t h e s e p e o p l e a re linked by b o n d s of n e i g h b o r l i n e s s , a c o m m o n p over ty. T h ey l augh, e m b r a c e , play g a m e s of c h a n c e , e x c h a n g e w h i s p e r e d c o n f i d e n c e s , b i c k e r , t r a n s a c t b u s i n e s s , a n d join t o g e t h e r in t h e rites of t h e local religion, p e r f o r m i n g a r o u t i n e t h a t involves six p e o p l e c l as pi ng h a n d s a n d c h a n t i n g . Privacy s e e m s o b s o l e t e h e r e . T h e y u n d r e s s freely b e f o r e o n e a n o t h e r a n d t h e r e ar e i n s t a n ce s of o p e n c o u p l i n g . T h e gaiety of t h e s c e n e — a m e d i e v a l c a r n i v a l is w h a t it s u g g e s t s t o m e , a B r u e g h e l e s q u e r o m p — is m a r r e d o nl y by my a w a r e n e s s t ha t this h o r d e of re ve le rs is h o m e l e s s u n d e r t h e i n h o s p i t a b l e skies, v u l n e r a b l e t o rain, sleet, d a m p fog, s n o w , a n d t h e o t h e r u n k i n d n e s s e s of w i n t e r a n d s u m m e r in t h e s e lat it udes. In Ganf iel d w e have just a s c a t t er i n g of s t r e e t - s l e e p e r s , t h o s e w h o have lost t h e i r resi dent ial l i ce ns es a n d a r e t e m p o r a r i l y f o r c e d into t h e o p e n , b u t h e r e it s e e m s t o b e an e s t a b l i s h e d insti tut ion, as t h o u g h C o n n i n g To wn d e c l a r e d a m o r a t o r i u m s o m e years a go o n n e w resident ial c o n s t r u c t i o n w i t h o u t at t h e s a m e t im e c h e c k i n g t h e i n c r ea s e of p o p u l a t i o n . S t e p p i n g o v e r a n d a r o u n d a n d b e t w e e n p e o p l e , I r ea c h t h e c e n t e r o f t h e pl aza a n d s e l e c t an u n o c c u p i e d bit of p a v e m e n t . But in a m o m e n t a little r u d dy - f a c e d w o m a n arrives, e xc it e d a n d a n i m a t e d , a n d with a C o n n i n g T o w n a c c e n t so t hi ck I can barel y u n d e r s t a n d h e r, s h e tells m e s h e h ol d s claim h e r e . He r e y e s a re b r i g h t with m e n a c e ; h e r h a n d s a r e n o t far f r o m b e c o m ing claws; several n e a r b y s q u a t t e r s sit u p a n d r e ga rd m e t h r e a t eni ngl y. I a p o l o g i z e for my e r r o r a n d w i t h d r a w , s t u m b l i n g ov e r a child a n d n ar r ow ly mi ss i ng o v e r t u r n i n g a b u b b l i n g c o o k i n g pot . O n w a r d . N o t h e r e . N o t h e r e . A h a n d e m e r g e s f r o m a pile of b l a n k e t s a n d s t r o k e s my leg as I l o ok a r o u n d in p e r p l e x ity. N ot h e r e . A m a n with a p a i n t e d face rises o u t of a mi n i a t ur e g r e e n t e n t a n d s p e a k s t o m e in a l a n g u a g e I d o n o t u n d e r s t a n d . 189
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N ot h e r e . I m o v e o n again a n d again, t h i n k i n g t h a t I will b e j ost led o u t of t h e plaza enti rely, e x c l u d e d , disqual i f ied e v e n t o s l e e p in this district's s tr e e t s , b u t finally I find a c r a m p e d c o r n e r w h e r e t h e o c c u p a n t s i nd i ca te I a m w e l c o m e . " Ye s? ” I say. T h e y grin a n d g e s t u r e . Gratefully I seize t h e s po t. D a r k n e s s has c o m e . The plaza c o n t i n u e s t o fill; at least a t h o u s a n d p e o p l e have arrived after m e , c r a m m i n g into every v acancy, a n d t h e flow d o e s n o t a b a t e . I h e a r b o o m i n g la u g h t e r , idle c h a t t e r , e a r n e s t r o m a n t i c p e r s u a s i o n , t h e brittle s o u n d of d o m e s t i c q u a r r e l i ng . S o m e o n e p a s s e s a j ug of w i n e a r o u n d , e v e n t o m e ; bi tt er stuff, f e r m e n t e d clam j ui ce its p r o b a b l e b a se , b u t I a p p r e c i a t e t h e g e s t u r e . T he ni gh t is w a r m , a l m o s t sticky. T h e s c e n t of unfami l iar f o o d drifts o n t h e air— s o m e t h i n g s h a r p, spicy, a heavy, p u n g e n t smell. Curry? Is this t h e n truly Calcutta? I c l os e my eyes a n d h u d d l e into myself. T he h a rd c o b b l e s t o n e s ar e c old b e n e a t h m e. I h av e n o ma tt r es s a n d I feel u n a b l e t o r e m o v e my c l o t h e s b e f o r e so m a n y s t r a ng e rs . It will b e h a r d for m e t o s l e e p in this m a d h o u s e , I t hi nk. But gr adual l y t h e h u b b u b d i m i n i s h e s a n d — e x h a u s t e d , d r a i n e d — I slide into a d e e p , t r o u b l e d s l e e p . Ugly d r e a m s . T h e as p h y xi at in g p r e s s u r e of a s u rg i n g m o b . Rivers l ea p in g t h e i r c h a n n e l s . T o we r s t o p p l i n g . Fou n ta i n s of m u d b u r s t i n g f ro m a t h o u s a n d lofty w i n d o w s . Bands of steel enc ir cli ng my t hi gh s; my legs, u s e l e ss , w i t h e r i n g away. A t o r r e n t of lice s w e e p i n g o v e r m e . A frosty h a n d t o u c h i n g m e . T o u c h i n g me . T o u c h i n g m e . Pulling m e u p f ro m sl e ep . Harsh w h i t e light d r e n c h e s m e . I blink, c r i ng e , c o v e r my eyes. Shortly I p e r c e i v e t h a t a m o n i t o r s t a n ds o v e r m e . A b o u t m e t h e s l e e p e r s a r e a w a k e , b a c k i n g a w a y , m u r m u r i n g , p o i nt i n g . "Your street-sleeping permit, please." C a u g h t . I m u m b l e e x c u s e s , p l ea d i g n o r a n c e of t h e law, b e g f or gi ve ne s s. But a p ol ic e m a c h i n e is n e i t h e r m a l e v o l e n t n or merciful; it m e re l y follows its p r o g r a m . It d e m a n d s my p a s s p o r t a n d s c an s my visa. T h e n it r e m i n d s m e I have b e e n u n d e r survei l lance. Having failed t o o b t a i n a ho t el r o o m as o r d e r e d , having n e g l e c t e d to r e p o r t t o a m o n i t o r within t h e p r e s c r i b e d interval, I a m s u b j e c t t o e x pu l s i o n . 190
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"V e ry w e l l, " I say. " C o n d u c t m e t o t h e b o r d e r of Ha wk N e s t . " " Yo u will r et u r n at o n c e t o G a n f ¡e l d. " "I h av e b u s i n e s s in H a wk N e s t . " "Illegal e n t r a n t s a r e r e t u r n e d t o t h e i r district of o r i g i n . " " W h a t d o e s it m a t t e r t o y ou w h e r e I go , so l o n g as I ge t o u t of C o n n i n g T o w n ? " "Illegal e n t r a n t s a re r e t u r n e d t o t h e i r district of o r i g i n , " t h e m a c h i n e tells m e inexor abl y. I d a r e n o t g o back wi th so little a c c o m p l i s h e d . Still a r g u i n g with t h e m o n i t o r , I a m led f ro m t h e pl aza t h r o u g h d a r k c a v e r n o u s s t r e e t s t o w a r d t h e m o u t h of a t r ans it t u b e . O n t h e station level a s e c o n d m o n i t o r is given c h a r g e of m e . "I n t h r e e h o u r s , " t h e m o n i t o r t h a t a p p r e h e n d e d m e in f or ms m e , " t h e Ganfieldb o u n d train will a rr ive ." T h e first m o n i t o r rolls away. T o o late I realize t h a t t h e m a c h i n e has n e g l e c t e d t o r e t u r n my p a s s po r t .
VIII M o n i t o r n u m b e r t w o s h o w s little i n t e r e st in m e . Patrolling t h e t u b e s tati on, it swi ngs in a w i d e arc a r o u n d m e , k e e p i n g a s c a n n e r p e r f u n ct o ri ly t r a i n e d o n m e b u t m a k i n g n o a t t e m p t t o i n te r fe r e with w h a t I d o . If I try t o flee, of c o u r s e , it will d e s t r o y m e . Fretfully I s t u d y my m a p s . H aw k Nest lies to t h e n o r t h e a s t of C o n n i n g T o w n ; if this is t h e t u b e station t ha t I t h i n k it is, t h e b o r d e r is n o t far. Five m i n u t e s ' walk, p e r h a p s . Pa ssp or tl es s, t h e r e is n o p la c e I c an g o e x c e p t Ganf¡eld; my c o m m u t e r st at us is r e v o k e d . But legalities c o u n t for little in Ha wk Nest. H o w to e s c a p e ? I c o n c o c t a plan. Its simplicity s e e m s a b s u r d , ye t a bs u rd it y is o f te n useful w h e n d e a l i n g with m a c h i n e s . T he m o n i t o r is i n s t r u c t e d t o p u t m e a b o a r d t h e train for Ganf¡el d, yes. But n o t ne ce ssa ri ly t o k e e p m e t h e r e . I wait o u t t h e w e a r y h o u r s t o d a w n . I h e a r t h e c ra s h of c o m p r e s s e d air far u p t h e t u n n e l . S n u b - n o s e d , s i l k e n - s m o o t h , t h e train slides into t h e s tat ion. T he m o n i t o r o r d e r s m e a b o a r d . 191
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I walk into t h e car, c ro ss it quickly, a n d exit by t h e o p e n d o o r o n t h e far s id e of t h e pl at f o r m. Even if t h e m o n i t o r has o b s e r v e d this m a n e u v e r , it ca n hardly fire a cr os s a c r o w d e d train. As I leave t h e car I b r e a k into a tr ot , d a r t i n g p as t s t ar t led tr avel er s, a n d s pr in t u ps t ai rs i nt o t h e misty m o r n i n g . At s t r e e t level, r u n n i n g is u n w i s e . I d r o p b a c k t o a rapid wa lk in g p a c e a n d melt i n t o t h e t h r o n g s o f e a r l y w o r k e r s . T h e s t r e e t is C r y s t a l Bou l ev ar d. G o o d . I have m e m o r i z e d a r o u t e : Crystal Boul evar d t o Fl ags to ne S q u a r e , t h e n c e via M e c h a n i c St r ee t t o t h e b o r d e r . P r e s u m a b l y all m o n i t o r s , linked t o w h a t e v e r c ent r al n e r v o u s s ys te m t h e m a c h i n e s of t h e district of C o n n i n g T ow n utilize, h a ve i n s t a n t a n e o u s l y b e e n a p p r i s e d of my d i s a p p e a r a n c e . But t h a t is n o t t h e s a m e as k n o w i n g w h e r e t o find m e . I h e a d n o r t h w a r d o n Crystal B o u l e v a rd — its n a m e s h o w s a d a r k s e n s e of irony, o r e ls e t h e s e v e r e t r a n s f o r m a t i o n s t i m e c an w o r k — a n d , b o r n e by t h e flow of p e d e s t r i a n traffic, e n t e r Fl agst one S q u a r e , a grimy, l o p s i d e d pl aza o u t of w h i c h , o n t h e left, s n a k e s c ur vi ng M e c h a n i c Str ee t. I g o u n i n t e r c e p t e d o n this t h o r o u g h f a r e of small s h o p s . T h e pl ac e t o a n t i c ip a te t r o u b l e is at t h e b o r d e r . I a m t h e r e in a f e w m i n u t e s . It is a w i d e , d u s t y s t r e e t , silent a n d e m p t y , l ined o n t h e C o n n i n g T o w n s i d e by a r o w of bl oc ky brick w a r e h o u s e s , o n t h e H aw k N e s t s i de by a st r ing of low, r a g ge d b u i ld in gs , s o m e in rui ns, t h e b e s t of t h e m defiant ly slatternly. T h e r e is n o barri er. To f e n c e a district b o r d e r is unlawful e x c e p t in t i m e of w a r , a n d I h a v e h e a r d of n o wa r b e t w e e n C o n n i n g T ow n a n d H a w k Nest. D ar e I cross? Police m a c h i n e s of t w o s p e c i e s pat rol t h e s t r e e t: f l a t - d o m e d o n e s of C o n n i n g T ow n a n d black h e x a g o n - h e a d e d o n e s of H aw k Nest. Surely o n e o r t h e o t h e r will g u n m e d o w n in t h e n o m a n ' s l and b e t w e e n districts. But I h av e n o c h o i c e . I m u s t k e e p g o i n g f or wa rd . I run o u t into t h e s tr e e t at a m o m e n t w h e n tw o police m a c h i n e s , p a ss i n g e a c h o t h e r o n o p p o s i t e o rbi ts , h a v e left an u n p a t r o l l e d s p a c e p e r h a p s a b l oc k long. Mi dwa y in my c r o s si ng t h e C o n n i n g T o w n m o n i t o r s pi es m e a n d bl ar es a c o m m a n d . T h e w o r d s a r e u n i nt e lli gi bl e t o m e a n d I k e e p r u n n i n g , zigzag192
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g¡ng in t h e h o p e o f a v o id i ng t h e bolt t h a t very likely will follow. But t h e m a c h i n e d o e s n o t s h o o t ; I m u s t a lr e ad y b e o n t h e Ha wk N e s t s id e of t h e line a n d C o n n i n g To wn n o l o n g e r c ar e s w h a t b e c o m e s of me. T he H a wk N e st m a c h i n e has n o t i c e d m e . It rolls t o w a r d m e as I s t u m b l e , b r e a t h l e s s a n d g a s p in g , o n t o t h e c u r b. " H a l t ! " it cries. " P r e s e n t y o u r d o c u m e n t s ! " At t h a t m o m e n t a redb e a r d e d m a n , f i e r c e - e y e d , w i d e - s h o u l d e r e d , s t e p s o u t of a d e c a y i n g b u i ld i ng c l os e by m e . A s c h e m e a s s e m b l e s itself in my mi n d. Do t h e c u s t o m s of s p o n s o r s h i p a n d s a n c t u a r y ho ld g o o d in this h ar sh district? " B r o t h e r ! " I cry. " W h a t l u c k ! " I e m b r a c e h im , a n d b e f o r e h e c an fling m e off I m u r m u r , "I a m fr om C a n f i e l d . I s e e k s a n c t u a r y h e r e. H el p m e ! " T h e m a c h i n e has r e a c h e d m e . It g o e s into an i n t e r r o ga t o r y s t a n c e a n d I say, "This is my b r o t h e r w h o offers m e t h e privilege of s a n c t u a ry . Ask him! Ask h i m ! " "Is this t r u e ? " t h e m a c h i n e in qu ir es . R e d b e a r d , u n s mi li n g, spits a n d m u t t e r s , " M y b r o t h e r , yes. A political r e f u g e e . I'll s t a n d s p o n s o r t o him. I v o u c h for him. Let him b e . " T he m a c h i n e clicks, h u m s , assimilates. To m e it says, "You will r eg i st er as a s p o n s o r e d r e f u g e e wit hin t w e lv e h o u r s o r leave Ha wk N e s t . " W i t h o u t a n o t h e r w o r d it rolls away. I of f er my s u d d e n s avior w a r m t h a n k s . He scowl s, s h a k e s his h e a d , spits o n c e again. " W e o w e e a c h o t h e r n o t h i n g , " h e says b r u s q u e l y , a n d g o e s s tri di ng d o w n t h e s t r e et . IX In Ha wk Nes t n a t u r e has f o ll o we d art. T h e n a m e , I have h e a r d , o n c e h a d p ur e ly ne ut r al c o n n o t a t i o n s : s o m e real -est ate d e v e l o p e r ' s high- fl own m e t a p h o r , n o t h i n g m o r e . Yet it d e t e r m i n e d t h e district's c h a r a c t e r , for gr aduall y H a wk Nes t b e c a m e t h e h o m e of p r e d a t o r s t h a t it is t o da y, w h e r e all m e n a r e s t r a n ger s, w h e r e e ve ry m a n is his b r o t h e r ' s e n e m y . O t h e r districts have t h e i r s lums . Ha wk Nest is a sl um. I a m 193
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tol d t h e y live h e r e by l oot ing, c h e a t i n g , e xt o rt in g , a n d m a n ipulat i ng. An o d d e c o n o m i c ba s e for an e n t i r e c o m m u n i t y , b u t m a y b e it w o r k s for t h e m . The a t m o s p h e r e is m e n a c i n g . T he o n l y poli ce m a c h i n e s s e e m t o b e t h o s e t h a t patrol t h e b o r d e r . I s e n s e e m a n a t i o n s of v i o l e n c e just b e y o n d t h e c o r n e r of my e ye : r a pe s a n d g ar ro t¡ n g s in s h a d o w y byways, flashing knives a n d mu f fl e d g r oa n s , c o v e r t ca nn i ba l feasts. P e r h a ps my i ma g in a ti o n w o r k s t o o h a rd . Cert ai nl y I have g o n e u n t h r e a t e n e d so far; t h o s e I m e e t o n t h e s t r e et s pay n o h e e d t o m e , i n d e e d will n o t e v e n r e t u r n my gl an c e. Still, I k e e p my heat-pistol c l o se by my h a n d as I w a l k t h r o u g h t h e s e s h a b b y , d e t e r i o r a t i n g out ski rt s. Sinister faces p e e r at m e t h r o u g h c r a c k e d , dirt-veiled w i n d o w s . If I a m a t t a c k e d , will I have t o fire in o r d e r t o d e f e n d myself? G o d s p a r e m e f r o m h avi ng t o a n s w e r t hat . X W h y is t h e r e a b o o k s h o p in this t o w n of m u r d e r a n d r u b b l e a n d de ca y? H e r e is Box St r e et, a n d h e r e , in an oily p o c k e t of s p a r e - p a r t s d e p o t s a n d f l y s p e ck e d q u i c k - l u n c h c o u n t e r s , is Nate a n d Holly B o r d e n ' s place. Five t i me s as d e e p as it is b r o a d , d u s t y , d i m l y lit, s h e l v e s o v e r f l o w i n g w i t h o l d b o o k s a n d p a m p h l e t s , an i m p r o b a b l e o u t p o s t of t h e n i n e t e e n t h c e n t u r y , s o m e h o w d i s p l a c e d in t i me . T h e r e is n o o n e in it b u t a large, i mpa s si ve w o m a n s e a t e d at t h e c o u n t e r , fleshy, puffy-faced, m o t i o n l e s s . H er e y e s, o d d l y i n t e n s e , glitter like glass disks s et in a m o u n d of d o u g h . S h e r e g a r d s m e w i t h o u t curiosity. I say, " I ' m l o o k in g f or Holly B o r d e n . " " Y o u ' v e f o u n d h e r , " s h e repl ies, d e e p in t h e b a r i t o n e r a ng e. " I ' v e c o m e a c r os s f r o m Ganf¡eld by wa y of C o n n i n g T o w n . " No r e s p o n s e fr om h e r t o this. I c o n t i n u e , " I ' m tr avel ing w i t h o u t a p a s s p o r t . They c o n f i s c a t e d it in C o n n i n g T o w n a n d I ran t h e b o r d e r . " Sh e n o d s . An d waits. No s h o w of int erest . "I w o n d e r if y o u c o u l d sell m e a c o p y of W ald en T h r e e ,” I say. N o w s h e stirs a little. " W h y d o y o u w a n t o n e ? "
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" I ' m c u r i o u s a b o u t it. It's n ot available in C a n f i e l d . " " H o w d o y ou k n o w I h av e o n e ? " "Is a n y t h i n g illegal in Ha wk Ne st ?" Sh e s e e m s a n n o y e d t h a t I have a n s w e r e d a q u e s t i o n with a q u e s t i o n . " H o w d o y ou k n o w I have a c o p y of t h a t b o o k ? " "A b o o k s h o p clerk in C o n n i n g T o w n said y ou m i g h t . " A p a u s e . "All right. S u p p o s e I d o . Did y o u c o m e all t h e wa y f r o m Ganf¡eld just t o b u y a b o o k ? " S u d d e n l y s h e leans forward and sm iles— a w a rm , ke en , p e n e tr a tin g smile that wh ol ly t r a n s f o r m s h e r f ace: n o w s h e is k e y e d - u p , alert, r e s p o n sive, s h r e w d , c o m m a n d i n g . " W h a t ' s y o u r g a m e ? " s h e asks. "My game?" " W h a t are y o u playing? W h a t a re y ou u p t o h e r e ? " It is t h e m o m e n t for total h o n e s t y . " I ' m l o o k i n g for a w o m a n n a m e d Silena Ruiz, f r o m Ca nf i el d. Have y ou h e a r d of h e r ? " "Yes. S h e ' s n o t in Ha wk N e s t . " "I t h i n k s h e ' s in Kingston. I'd like t o find h e r . " " W h y ? To a rr e st h er ?" "J ust t o talk t o her . I have p l e n t y t o d i s c us s with her . S h e was my m o n t h - w i f e w h e n s h e left G a n f ¡e l d . " " T h e m o n t h m u s t b e ne ar ly u p , " Holly B o r d e n says. "Even s o , " I reply. " C a n y o u h e l p m e r e ac h h er ?" " W h y sho uld I trust y ou?" "W hy not?" Sh e p o n d e r s t h a t briefly. S h e s t u d i e s my face. I feel t h e h ea t of h e r scruti ny. At l e n gt h s h e says, "I e x p e c t t o b e m a k i n g a j o u r n e y t o Kingston s o o n . I s u p p o s e I c o u l d t a k e y o u with me." XI Sh e o p e n s a t r a p d o o r ; I d e s c e n d into a r o o m b e n e a t h t h e b o o k s h o p . After a g o o d m a n y h o u r s a t hi n, gr ay- hai r ed m a n br i ng s m e a tray of f o o d . "Call m e N a t e , " h e says. O v e r h e a d I h e a r indi st inct c o n v e r s a t i o n s , l a u gh te r , t h e t h u m p i n g of b o o t s on t h e w o o d e n floor. In C a nf i e l d , f a m i n e may b e s et t i ng in by n o w. Rats will b e d a n c i n g a r o u n d Ganf¡eld Hol d. H o w l on g 195
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will t h e y k e e p m e h er e ? Am I a p r i s on e r? Two days. T hr ee . N at e will a n s w e r n o q u e s t i o n s . I h a ve b o o k s , a c o t, a sink, a d r i n k i n g glass. O n t h e thir d day t h e t r a p d o o r o p e n s . Holly B o r d e n p e e r s d o w n . " W e ' r e r e a d y t o l e a v e , " s h e says. T h e e x p e d i t i o n co n si st s j us t of t h e t wo of us. S he is g o i n g t o Kingston t o b u y b o o k s a n d travels o n a c o m m e r c i a l p a s s p o r t t h a t allows f or o n e h e l p e r . N at e drives us t o t h e t u b e - m o u t h in m i d a f t e r n o o n . It n o l o n g e r s e e m s u n u s u a l t o m e t o b e p a ss i ng f r o m district t o district; t h e y a r e n o t s u c h alien a n d hostile pl aces , m e r e l y d i f f e re n t f r om t h e pl ace I k n o w. I s e e myself b o u n d o n an o d y s s e y t ha t carri es m e a cr os s h u n d r e d s of d is t r ic ts, e v e n t h o u s a n d s , t h e w h o l e p a t c h w o r k f r e n z y o f o u r w o r l d. W h y r e t u r n t o Ganf iel d? W h y n o t g o o n , e v e r e a s t w a r d , t o t h e g r e at o c e a n a n d b e y o n d , t o t h e u n i m a g i n a b l e s t r a n g e n e s s e s o n t h e far side? H e r e w e a re in Kingston. An old district, o n e of t h e ol de s t. W e a re t h e onl y o n e s w h o j o u r n e y h i t h e r t o d a y fr om Ha wk Nest. T h e r e is o nl y a p e r f u n c t o r y i ns p e c t i o n of p a s s p o r t s . The pol ic e m a c h i n e s of Kingston a r e tall, l o n g - a r m e d , with fluted b o d i e s o r n a m e n t e d in stri pes of r ed a n d g r e e n : q u i t e a gay effect. I a m b e c o m i n g an e x p e r t in local vari at ions of policem a c h i n e d e s i g n . Kingston itself is a district of l ow pastel b u i l d ings a r r a n g e d in s p o k e l i k e b o u l e v a r d s r adi ati ng f r o m t h e f a m e d university t h a t is its chi ef e n t e r p r i s e . No o n e f r o m Ganfiel d has b e e n a d m i t t e d t o t h e university in my m e m o r y . Holly is e x p e c t i n g f r i en d s t o m e e t h e r, b u t t h e y have n o t c o m e . W e wait fifteen m i n u t e s . " N e v e r m i n d , " s h e says. "We' ll w a l k . " I carry t h e l u g g a ge . T he air is soft a n d mild; t h e s u n , s l op i n g t o w a r d F o l k s to n e a n d Budl e¡gh, is still high. I f eel o d d l y s e r e n e . It is as if I h a v e p e r c e i v e d a divi ne p u r p o s e , an o v e r r i d i n g plan, in t h e s t r u c t u r e of o u r s oci et y, in o u r s p r aw li n g city of m a n y cities, o u r n e t w o r k of steel a n d c o n c r e t e cl ingi ng like an a r m o r o f scales t o t h e skin o f o u r p la ne t. But w h a t is t h a t p u r p o s e ? W h a t is t h a t plan? T h e e s s e n c e of it e l u d e s m e ; I a m a wa r e on ly t h a t it m u s t exist. A c h e e r y d e l u s i o n . Fifty p a c e s f r om t h e s ta tion w e a r e a b r u p t y s u r r o u n d e d by 196
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a d o z e n o r m o r e b u o y a n t y o u n g m e n w h o e m e r g e f r o m an i nt e r s e c t i n g s t r e et . T he y a r e n a k e d b u t for g r e e n loi ncloths; t h e i r hair a n d b e a r d s ar e u n t r i m m e d a n d u n k e m p t ; t h e y have a f i e r c e a n d b a r ba r ic look. Several carry l ong u n s h e a t h e d knives s t r a p p e d t o t h e i r waists. Th e y circle wildly a r o u n d us, l a u ghi ng, j a b b i n g at us with t h e i r fingerti ps. “ This is a holy dis tr i ct !" t h e y cry. " W e n e e d n o b l a s p h e m o u s s t r a n g e r s h e r e ! W h y m u s t y ou i n t r u d e o n us?" “ W h a t d o t h e y w a n t ? " I w h i s p e r . "A r e w e in d a n g e r ? " " T h e y a re a b a n d of p r i e s t s , " Holly repl ies. “ Do as t h e y say a n d w e will c o m e t o n o h a r m . " T h e y p r e s s c l o s e . L e ap i n g , d a n c i n g , t h e y s h o w e r us w i t h s prays of p e rs p i r a t i o n . “ W h e r e a re y o u f r o m ? " t h e y d e m a n d . " G a n f ¡ e l d , " I say. " H a w k N e s t , " says Holly. T he y s e e m playful yet d a n g e r o u s . Su rgi ng a b o u t m e , t h e y e m p t y my p o c k e t s in a s er i es of q ui ck , jostling forays: I lose my h eat - pi st ol , my m a p s , my u s el e ss let ter s of i n t r o d u c t i o n , my v a r io u s c u r r e nc i es , e ve r yt h in g , e v e n my s u i c i d e c a p s u l e . T h e s e t h i ng s t h e y pass a m o n g t h e m s e l v e s , e x cl ai mi ng o v e r t h e m ; t h e n t h e heat-pistol a n d s o m e of th e c u r re n c y are r e tu r n e d to me. " G a n f ¡ e l d , " t h e y m u r m u r . " H a w k N e s t ! " T h e r e is di st as te in t h e ¡ r v o ¡ c e s . "Filthy p l a c e s , " t h e y say. "Pl ac e s s c o r n e d by G o d , " t h e y say. T he y s e iz e o u r h a n d s a n d haul us a b o u t , m a k i n g us spi n. H e a v y - b o d i e d Holly is surpr i singl y graceful , b r e a k i n g into a s e r e n e l u m b e r i n g d a n c e t h a t m a k e s t h e m a p p l a u d in wonder. O n e , t h e tallest of t h e g r o u p , c a t c h e s o u r wrists a n d says, " W h a t is y o u r b u s i n e s s in Kingst on?" "I c o m e t o p u r c h a s e b o o k s , " Holly d e cl a r e s. "I c o m e t o find my m o n t h - w i f e S¡ lena, " say I. "S¡lena! Silena! S i le n a! " H e r n a m e b e c o m e s a j ubi lant i n c a n t a tio n o n t h e i r lips. "His m o n t h - w i f e ! S¡lena! His m o n t h - w i f e ! S¡lena! Silena! Si l e n a !" T h e tall o n e t h r u s t s his face a g ai n s t m i n e a n d says, " W e offer yo u a c h o i c e . C o m e a n d m a k e p r a y e r with us o r di e on t h e spot." 197
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" W e c h o o s e t o p r ay , " I tell him. They t u g at o u r a r ms , u r gi ng us i mp at ie nt ly o n w a r d . D o w n s t r e e t after s t r e e t until at last w e arrive at holy g r o u n d : a g a r d e n plot, insignificant in ar ea, p l a n t e d with unfamil iar b u s h e s a n d f lower s , t e n d e d wi th e v i d e n t car e. T he y p u s h us inside. " K n e e l , " t h e y say. "Kiss t h e s a c r ed e a r t h . " " A d o r e t h e t h i n g s t h a t g r o w in it, s t r a n g e r s . " "Gi ve t h a n k s to G o d for t h e b r e a t h y o u h a v e just d r a w n . " " A n d for t h e b r e a t h y ou a re a b o u t t o d r a w . " "Sing!" "W eep!" " L a u g h !" " T o u c h t h e s oi l! " "W orship!" XII Silena's r o o m is cool a n d q u i e t , in t h e u p p e r st or y of a resi d e n c e o v e r l o o k i n g t h e uni versi ty g r o u n d s . Sh e w e a r s a soft g r e e n r o b e of c o a r s e t e x t u r e , n o jewelry, n o f ace paint. Her d e m e a n o r is calm a n d s el f -a ss ur ed . I h a d f o r g o t t e n t h e d elicacy of h e r f e a t u r e s , t h e co o l , mal ici ous s p a r kl e of h e r d a rk eyes. " T h e m a s t e r p r o g r a m ? " s h e says, smiling. "I d e s t r o y e d it!" The d e p t h of my love for h e r u n n e r v e s m e . S t a n d i n g b e f o r e her , I feel my k n e e s t u r n i n g t o wa t er . In my e ye s s h e is b a t h e d in a glittering a u r a of sensuali ty. I s t r u g g l e t o c o n t r o l myself. "Y ou d e s t r o y e d n o t h i n g , " I say. " Y o u r voi ce b e tr a ys t h e lie." " You t h i n k I still have t h e p r o g r a m ? " "I k n o w y ou d o . " "We ll , y e s , " s h e a d m it s coolly. "I d o . ' My f i n g e r s t r e m b l e . My t h r o a t p a r c h e s . An a d o l e s c e n t f o ol i s h n e s s s e e k s t o e n g u l f me . " W h y did you steal it?" I ask. " O u t of love of m i s c hi e f . " "I s e e t h e lie in y o u r smile. W h a t w as t h e t r u e r e a s o n ? " " D o e s it m a t t e r ? " 198
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" T h e district is pa r al yz e d, Silena. T h o u s a n d s of p e o p l e suffer. W e a re at t h e m e r c y o f r ai de rs f r om a d j o i n i n g districts. M a n y have a lr e ad y d i e d of t h e h e a t, t h e stink of g a r b a g e , t h e failure of t h e hospital e q u i p m e n t . W h y d id y o u t a k e t h e p r o g r a m ? " " P e r h a p s I h a d political r e a s o n s . " "W hich were?" " T o d e m o n s t r a t e t o t h e p e o p l e of G a n f i e l d h o w u t t e r l y d e p e n d e n t o n t h e s e m a c h i n e s t h e y h ave a l l o we d t h e m s e l v e s to b e c o m e ." " W e k n e w t h a t a l r e a d y , " I s a y. " I f y o u m e a n t o n l y t o d r a m a t i z e o u r w e a k n e s s e s , y ou w e r e p r e s s i n g t h e o b v i o u s . W h a t was t h e p o i n t of c ri pp li ng us? W h a t c o u l d y o u gain f r o m it?" "Amusement?" " S o m e t h i n g m o r e t h a n t hat. Y o u ' r e n o t t ha t sha l lo w, S il ena ." " S o m e t h i n g m o r e t h a n t ha t, t h e n . By c ri pp l in g Ganf ield I h e l p t o c h a n g e t hi ng s. That ' s t h e p u r p o s e of a ny political act. To display t h e n e e d for c h a n g e , so t h a t c h a n g e may c o m e about." " S i m pl y d isplayi ng t h e n e e d is n o t e n o u g h . " "It' s a pl ac e t o b e g i n . " " D o y ou t hi n k s teal ing o u r p r o g r a m w as a rational way to b r in g c h a n g e , Si lena?" " Ar e y o u h a p p y ? " s h e retort s. "Is this t h e kind of w or l d you want?" "It' s t h e w o r l d w e h av e t o live in, w h e t h e r w e like it or not. An d w e n e e d t h at p r o g r a m in o r d e r to go o n c o pi n g . W i t h o u t it w e a r e p l u n g e d into c h a o s . " "F i ne. Let c h a o s c o m e . Let e v e r y t h i n g fall a p a r t so w e can r eb ui ld it." "Easy e n o u g h t o say, Silena. W h a t a b o u t t h e i n n o c e n t victims of y o u r r e v o lu t io n ar y zeal, t h o u g h ? " She s h r u g s . " T h e r e a re always i n n o c e n t victims in a ny r e v o l u t i o n . " In a s i n u o u s m o v e m e n t s h e rises a n d a p p r o a c h e s me . T h e c l o s e n e s s of h e r b o d y is d az z li ng a n d m a d d e n i n g . With e x a g g e r a t e d v o l u p t u o u s n e s s s h e c r o o n s , "Stay h e r e . Forget 199
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Ganf¡el d. Life is g o o d h e r e . T h e s e p e o p l e a re b u i ld i n g s o m e thing worth having." "Let m e h av e t h e p r o g r a m , " I say. " T h e y m u s t h ave r e p l a c e d it by n o w . " " R e p l a c i n g it is i mp o s s i b l e . T h e p r o g r a m is vital t o Ganf¡eld, S¡lena. Let m e h av e it." She e m i t s an icy laugh. "I b e g y o u , Sil ena ." " H o w boring you are!" "I love y o u . " "You love n o t h i n g b u t t h e st at us q u o . T h e s h a p e of thi ng s as t h e y a r e gives y o u g re at joy. You h ave t h e soul of a b u r e a u c r a t. " "If y ou have always h a d s u c h c o n t e m p t f or m e , w h y did y ou b e c o m e my m o n t h - w i f e ? " Sh e l aughs again. "F o r s p o r t , p e r h a p s . " H e r w o r d s ar e like knives. S u d d e n l y , t o my o w n a s t o n i s h m e n t , I a m b r a n d i s h i n g t h e heat -pist ol . " Gi ve m e t h e p r o g r a m o r I'll kill y o u ! " I cry. S he is a m u s e d . " G o . S h o o t . Can y ou g e t t h e p r o g r a m fr om a d e a d Si lena?" " G i ve it t o m e . " " H o w silly y ou l ook h o l d i n g t h at g u n ! " "I d o n ' t h av e t o kill y o u , " I tell h er . "I can m e r e l y w o u n d you. This pistol is c a p a b l e of inflicting light b u r n s t h a t scar t h e skin. Shall I give y o u b l e m i s h e s , S¡lena?" " W h a t e v e r y ou wish. I'm at y o u r m e r c y . " I aim t h e pistol at h e r th ig h. Silena's face r e m a i n s e x p r e s s i o n less. My a r m stiffens a n d b e g i n s t o qu ive r. I s t r ug gl e with t h e r e b e l li o u s m u s c l e s , b u t I s u c c e e d in s t e a d y i n g my aim o nl y for a m o m e n t b e f o r e t h e t r e m o r s r e t u r n . An e xu l ta n t gl e am e n t e r s h e r eyes. A flush of e x c i t e m e n t s p r e a d s o v e r h e r face. " S h o o t , " s h e says defiantly. " W h y d o n ' t y ou s h o o t m e ? " S h e k n o w s m e t o o well. W e s ta n d in a f r o z en t a b l e a u for an e n d l e s s m o m e n t o u t s i d e t i m e — a m i n u t e , an h o u r , a s e c o n d ? — a n d t h e n my a r m sags t o my side. I p u t t h e pistol away. 200
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It n e v e r w o u l d have b e e n p os s i b l e for m e t o fire it. A p o w e rf ul f ee li ng assails m e of havi ng p a s s e d t h r o u g h s o m e s u b t l e climax; it will all b e d o w n hi l l f r o m h e r e for m e , a n d w e b o t h k n o w it. Sw ea t d r e n c h e s m e . I feel d e f e a t e d , b r o k e n . Silena's f e a t ur e s reveal i n t e n s e s c o r n . S h e has a t t a i n e d s o m e e xa lt ed level of c o n s c i o u s n e s s in t h e s e past f e w m o m e n t s w h e r e all acts b e c o m e g r a t ui t o u s, w h e r e love a n d h a t e a n d r e vol ut ion a n d betrayal a n d loyalty a r e i n d i s t i n gu i s h a b l e f ro m o n e a n o t h e r . S h e s mil es t h e smile of s o m e o n e w h o has s c o r e d t h e w i n n i n g p o i n t in a g a m e t h e rules of w h i c h will n e v e r b e e x p l a i n e d t o me . “ You little b u r e a u c r a t , " s h e says calmly. " H e r e ! " From a c l o s e t s h e b r ing s for th a small par cel w h i c h s h e t o s s e s disdainful ly t o m e . It c o n t a i n s a d r u m of c o m p u t e r film. " T h e p r o g r a m ? " I ask. "This m u s t b e s o m e j ok e. You w o u l d n ' t a c t u ally give it to m e , S¡ lena. " " Yo u h ol d t h e m a s t e r p r o g r a m of Ganf¡el d in y o u r h a n d . " "Really, n o w ? " "Really really," s h e says. " T h e a u t h e n t i c it em. G o o n . Go. G e t o u t . Save y o u r s ti n k in g Ga nf ¡ el d. " "S ¡ len a— " "Go." XIII T he rest is t e d i o u s b u t s i mp l e. I l oc at e Holly B o r d e n , w h o has p u r c h a s e d a load of b o o k s . I h e l p h e r with t h e m , a n d w e r e t u r n via t u b e t o Ha wk Nest. T h e r e I t a k e r e f u g e b e n e a t h t h e b o o k s h o p o n c e m o r e w h il e a call is r o u t e d t h r o u g h O l d G r o ve , Parley Cl os e , T h e Mill, a n d p os si bl y s o m e o t h e r districts t o t h e district c apt ai n of Ganf¡el d. It t a ke s t wo d ays t o c o m p l e t e t h e c i r c u i t , s i n c e d is t r i c t rivalries m a k e a r o u n d a b o u t relay n e c e ss a r y . Ultimately I a m c o n n e c t e d a n d c o n v e y my h a p p y n e w s : I h a v e t h e p r o g r a m , t h o u g h I have lost my p a s s p o r t a n d a m f o r b i d d e n t o c r os s C o n n i n g T ow n. T h r o u g h d i p l om at ic c h a n n e l s a n e w p a s s p o r t is c o n v e y e d to m e a f e w days later, a n d I t a k e t h e t u b e h o m e t h e l on g way, via Budle¡gh, C e d a r 201
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Mall, a n d M o r t o n C o u r t . Ganf iel d is h i d e o u s , all filth a n d d isa r ray, c l o s e t o t h e p o i n t of irreversible c o ll a ps e ; its citi zens have l a ps e d i nt o a d e a d l y stasis a n d await t h e i r d o o m placidly. But I h av e r e t u r n e d with t h e p r o g r a m . T h e c ap t ai n pr ai se s my h e r o i s m . I will b e r e w a r d e d , h e says. I will h av e p r o m o t i o n t o t h e h i g h e s t ranks of t h e civil service, wi th h o p e o f a s c e n t t o t h e district c ounci l. But I t a k e pale p l e a s u r e f r o m his w o r d s . S¡lena's c o n t e m p t still g o v e r n s my t h o u g h t s . Bureaucrat. Bureaucrat. XIV Still, Ganf iel d is s a ve d. T h e p oli ce m a c h i n e s h av e b e g u n to m o v e again.
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In Dark Places JOE L. HENSLEY
T he m o r n i n g s w e r e g r o w i n g c ol de r. T h e r o n J o h n s o n left t h e w i n d o w s b o l t e d b u t u n l o c k e d t h e b a s e m e n t d o o r a n d w e n t d o w n t o d r a w w a t e r f ro m t h e still usable tap there. T h e " c h i l d r e n " (for t h a t wa s w h a t t h e y h a d n a m e d t h e m selves) h a d built o n e of t h e i r w o r s h i p i n g pla ce s in t h e far c o r n e r of t h e b a s e m e n t d u r i n g t h e night. Upst ai rs J o h n s o n c o u l d h e a r Ch a r l e s t i n k e r i n g wi th t h e t h r e e l e g g e d ca n t h a t s e r v e d as t h e i r w o o d c o o k s t o v e . In t h e w in t e r s it also m a d e t h e ki t c he n t h e o nl y hal f-warm r o o m in t h e h o u s e . " H e l l o , " J o h n s o n said g ent ly t o t h e " c h i l d r e n . " He ha d n e v e r h e a r d of t h e m b e i n g a d a n g e r , b u t h e h a d also n e v e r f o u n d t h e m in his b a s e m e n t b e f o r e . And t h e s e w e r e tricky days. T h e cult g r e w in n u m b e r s . Th ey h a d c o n s t r u c t e d an altar. It w a s a j a c k d a w t h i n g of o ld p a p e r s , d r ie d a u t u m n l eaves, s c ra p l u m b e r , a n d p i e ce s of l o n g - a b a n d o n e d cars. In t h e c e n t e r of t h e altar s t o o d t h e c r u d e s t a t u e of t h e o n e t h e y t er s e ly called " H i m , " a t h i n g of t o o m a n y legs a n d a r m s a n d e ye s s u r r o u n d i n g a h u g e mal e sex o r g a n . T he " c h i l d r e n " gave J o h n s o n n o n o t i c e a n d w e n t o n w o r s h i p ing in t h e i r usual way. T h e y lay in a h a p h a z a r d circle, males with ma le s, ma le s with f e m a l e s , f e m a l e s with f e m al e s , h a n d s s e e k i n g a n d e x p lo r in g , b o d i e s m e e t i n g in myriad ways so t h a t J o h n s o n ' s e y e s w e r e d i z z ie d by t h e m a n d by t h e very c o m p l e x ities of wr ig gli ng flesh. 203
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It w a s, h e t h o u g h t wryly, as g o o d a wa y t o fight d e s p a i r as a ny o t h e r way. T h e r e w e r e p e r h a p s thirty of t h e m in his b a s e m e n t . It was ha rd t o c o u n t as t h e y k e p t mov i ng . H e r e c o g n i z e d n o n e of t h e m . Ages r a n g e d f r om early t e e n s to an old c r o n e w i t h o u t a t o o t h left in h e r w r i n k l e d jaws. T h e cult was i m m e n s e l y p o p u l a r a n d it g r e w m o r e p o p u l a r e a c h day. " H i m ” was c o m i n g o u t of t h e j u n g l e t o r e s c u e his people. Sure. J o h n s o n d r e w w a t e r f r o m t h e t ap. T he p r e s s u r e s e e m e d low. Black f aces h e a r d t h e s o u n d of r u n n i n g w a t e r a n d t u r n e d to him a n d w a t c h e d him with m i n o r i nt er est. "J oin us, b r o t h e r ? " o n e i n q u i r e d politely. " N o , " h e said, s h u d d e r i n g i nside. " Yo u t r i ed y o u r w ays — n o w try o u r s . Let it e n d , M a y o r . " He w o n d e r e d w h a t a n d h o w m u c h t h e y k n e w of him. He fled u p t h e s t e p s a n d s h o t t h e bol t, l oc k ed , b e h i n d him a n d s t o o d s h iv e ri ng a m o m e n t b e f o r e h e c ar r ie d t h e w a t e r into t h e k it c h e n. T h e r e , h e r e s u m e d t h e mask. " W e h a v e c o m p a n y in t h e b a s e m e n t , " h e s ai d c a l ml y t o Charles. " S o m e of th a t m o b that runs th e stre e ts w ith o u t c l ot he s . I g u e s s m a y b e t h e w a t e r b r o u g h t t h e m . A lot of p e o p l e k n o w w e ' v e g o t a t a p t h a t still w o r k s . " C h a r le s ' s face w a s b l ue -bl ac k, b u t his hair was s h i n i n g whi te . He was T h e r o n J o h n s o n ' s o l d e r half b r o t h e r , s a m e m o t h e r , d i f f er en t f at he r. They h a d f o u g h t e a c h o t h e r a n d h e l p e d e a c h o t h e r all of t h e i r lives. Th ey h a d p r a ct i c e d law t o g e t h e r a n d w h e n t h e i r wives ha d d i e d t h e y ha d m o v e d in t o g e t h e r . Ch ar le s t o o k t h e w a t e r a n d m e a s u r e d s o m e of it into a p an. "They'll m o v e o n , " h e said k nowi ngly. " T h e y d o n ' t stay n o place long. Ye st er da y I s a w a lot of t h e m u p by t h e f e n c e. S o m e of t h e m gals h a d t h e m w h¡ t ey g u a r d s s h o o k f r om w a t c h ing. A nd t h e y all k e p t yelling, 'Hi m is c o m i n g ! ' " He g r i n n e d . "They'll d o t h a t in t h e day, b u t t h e y like t o b e away f r om t h e Feep ' c o p t e r s at night. Th e y say lots of t h e m stay d o w n at 204
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t h a t ol d a u t o factory n e a r w h e r e t h e library u s e d t o b e . Sl e ep t h e r e n ight s w h e n t h e y s l e ep . So y o u just wait. They'll m o v e o n . " He n o d d e d . "B re akf a st n o w in five m i n u t e s . " J o h n s o n n o d d e d ba ck. He w e n t d o w n t h e hall a n d t o t h e d o u b le - b a r r e d front d o o r of th e h o u s e . He u n b a r r e d and o p e n e d t h e d o o r a m i n u t e c ra ck a n d p e e r e d o u t t o e x a m i n e t h e day. T he w i n d was brisk a n d t h e r e was, as yet, n o s u n . N o t h i n g m o v e d in t h e s tr e et s, b u t h e c o u l d h e a r t h e b e a t - b e a t of a patrol h e l i c o p t e r n e ar b y . I nside it h e c o u l d visualize Feeps, Federal Police, sitting r ea d y at t h e g u n s , w h i t e faces all e a r n e s t a n d waiting. To t h e n o r t h , t w o b loc ks away, pas t r u i n e d a p a r t m e n t s , he c o u l d s e e t h e tall, electri fi ed f e n c e of t h e w h i t e e nc l av e. A c r u d e sign wi th in his view w as t o o small for him t o r ea d, b u t h e k n e w it r ea d, STAY AWAY, NIGGER. T he sign w a s inside t h e f e n c e , a n d n ex t t o t h e sign, m o u n t e d o n p ol e s, w e r e t h e h e a d s of t h r e e black m e n . T h e h e a d s h a d b e e n t h e r e f or a l o n g t i m e n o w a n d t h e y h a d b e e n p i c k e d sterile cl ean by t h e v o r a c i o u s birds. O n c e J o h n s o n h ad h e a r d w h o t h e t h r e e m e n w e r e , b u t t h e n a m e s ha d fled his m e m o r y . A bicycle w e n t by o u t s i d e a n d h e c l o s e d t h e d o o r so t ha t he couldn't be seen. T oda y C ha rl es c o u l d s t a n d g u a r d a n d J o h n s o n w o u l d m o v e t h e rest of t h e i r b o o k s f r o m w h a t ha d o n c e b e e n t h e i r joint law office. He w o u l d m o v e t h e m h e r e t o t h e ma ke s h if t s he l ve s of bricks s u p p o r t i n g old b o a r d s w h e r e h e ' d p u t t h e o t h e r b o o k s . He r e sol ve d t h a t w h e n t h e " c h i l d r e n " left t h e b a s e m e n t h e w o u l d g o d o w n a n d d e s t r o y t h a t o b s c e n e altar, t e a r it d o w n , b u r n it. And h e ' d try t o find o u t h o w t h e y h ad g a i n e d ent r y a n d m a k e c er tai n it c o u l d n ' t h a p p e n again. He a te a s pa r t a n br e a k f a s t of b r e a d t o a s t e d o v e r t h e small fire. He w a s h e d t h e b r e a d d o w n with d r a u g h t s of inst ant , e rsatz co f fee. W h e n he was d o n e , J o h n s o n said, " I ' m g o i n g t o walk to t h e office a n d g e t t h e rest of t h e b o o k s . " Ch a r l e s g r i n n e d at him w i t h o u t h u m o r . He s h o o k his h e ad . 205
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“ You just c a n ' t m a k e y o u r s e l f b e lieve it's over . Books w o n ' t d o us a ny g o o d n o w , m a n . T he y t o o k away t h e c o u rt s . Stay h e r e . It's d a n g e r o u s o u t s i d e . And t o d a y is f o o d - t r u c k d a y . " "You'll b e h e r e with t h e ration c a r d s , " J o h n s o n said. "I w a n t those books." “ Yes, sir, Mr. M a y o r , " C h a r l e s said, his c o n t e m p t s h o w i n g in his eyes. "I'll b e h e r e. But y o u leave t h e rifle." J o h n s o n n o d d e d . He w o u l d t a k e t h e pistol. O n c e h e was o u t s i d e h e s kir ted away f r o m t h e large a p a r t m e n t b u i l d in g at t h e n e a r c o r n e r . T he f e w sur vi vor s in it ha d c o n v e r t e d t o c a nn i b a l i s m . H e d o u b t e d t h a t a ny w o u l d attack him in dayl ight , b u t all t h i n g s w e r e p o ss i b l e . T h e t e n a n t s ha d h u n t e d o n e a n o t h e r t h r o u g h t h e d a r k e n e d halls all last w i n t e r a n d J o h n s o n h a d s o m e t i m e s h e a r d t h e s c r e a m s of t h e losers. N o w t h e s urvi vors s o m e t i m e s ran in small p ac ks , b u t most l y J o h n s o n h a d s e e n t h e m h u n t in solitaire. T h e Fe ep s r e fu s e d t o d i s t r i b u t e rat ions at t h e b u i ld i n g a n d t h e i n ha b i t an t s g r e w hungrier. It was still early. At this t i m e of da y n o t m a n y p e o p l e v e n t u r e d a b r o a d a n d t h o s e w h o w e r e o u t h u r ri e d . T he g a n g s w o r k e d b e t t e r in d a r k n e s s ; t h e s a l e s m e n w h o o f f e r e d f re s h m e a t of a d u b i o u s n a t u r e w e r e n ' t o u t yet. And d r u g p e d d l e r s sl ept later t h a n he did, J o h n s o n r ef le cted . He w a l k e d a r o u t e well k n o w n t o hi m. It t o o k him pas t t h e b u r n e d - o u t b u i l d i n g s of t h e d o w n t o w n c o m p l e x , w h e r e t h e o p e n display w i n d o w s o f t h e s t o r e s , glassless n o w , h el d onl y r u b b i s h a n d filth. He p i c ke d his way carefully pas t t h e m a n d t h e d e b r i s t h a t littered t h e c r u m b l i n g s idewal ks . N o n e of t h e traffic lights w o r k e d n o w , b u t t h e o nl y traffic m o v i n g w a s an o c ca s io n a l F e e p - g u a r d e d a r m o r e d c o n v o y d is p e n s i n g f o o d t o citizen c a r d h o l d e r s . His office was in a b u i l d i n g a c r o s s f ro m t h e old c o u r t h o u s e . In t h e t i m e of b la c k- wh i te c o n f r o n t a t i o n t h e c o u r t h o u s e ha d b e e n b u r n e d a n d t h e d o m e d r oo f h a d fallen. He c o u l d n o t vi ew t h e r e m a i n s w i t h o u t t i g h t n e s s in his t h r o a t . He u n l o c k e d t h e office d o o r c au ti ou sl y, b u t all s e e m e d well. 206
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He p e e r e d a r o u n d t o m a k e c er tain a n d t h e n , satisfied, h e s p r e a d t h e s t o u t s h e e t h e ' d b r o u g h t a n d g e nt l y s ta c k e d t h e last of t h e b o o k s i nsi de, t h e final v o l u m e s of C o rp u s Juris T ertium . Everything el se h e n e e d e d w as a lr eady, after c o u n t l e s s trips, in t h e h o u s e . T h e r e w e r e a f e w t o o m a n y b o o k s left for an eas y trip. He k n e w t h a t w h e n h e h e f t e d t h e sack, b u t h e w a s n ' t g o i n g to c o m e b a c k h e r e again. He w o u l d just h av e t o m o v e slowly a n d c h a n g e t h e heavy s ac k f r o m s h o u l d e r to s h o u l d e r as h e t ir ed. H e s u r v e y e d t h e office o n c e m o r e . He r e g r e t t e d leaving t h e d e s k s . Th e y w o u l d m a k e e x ce l le n t f i r e w o o d . T h e r e w a s little els e of value. The r ugs w e r e w o r n a n d w i n t e r s w i t h o u t h ea t h a d s t r i p p e d t h e walls of paint. H e ' d s p e n t half his life in this office with Ch ar l es . H e r e t h e Black Coal it i on h a d c o m e t o ask him t o r un for t h e c oun ci l a n d later for m a y o r of t h e city. M a n y h a d c o m e h e r e s e e k i n g favor, black a n d w hi te . And, after t h e t i m e of fire, t h e Fe eps h ad c o m e h e r e also a n d h e ' d m a d e his r e l uc t a n t deal for his p e o p l e a n d t h e y h a d lived w h e n ma n y, black a n d w h i t e , h a d d i e d . M a y b e h e ' d b e e n w r o n g t o d o it, b u t h e ha d d o n e it. T h e Fe ep s h a d p r o m i s e d n o reprisals. He s mi le d bitterly, r e m e m b e r i n g t hat. It h a d n o w b e e n six year s. Six years of e lect r ic f e n c e s a n d Feeps. H e lifted t h e s ack a n d m o v e d o n o u t of t h e r o o m . He l o c k e d t h e d o o r carefully b e h i n d him for h e w as a careful ma n. In his city, six y ea rs a g o , t h e r e h a d b e e n s k ir mi sh e s a n d fire fights a n d m a n y h a d d i e d , b u t h e ha d a b u s e d a n d c o n n i v e d a n d e v e n b e t r a y e d his p e o p l e away fr om t h e s h o r t, b l o o d y w ar t h a t h a d d e c i m a t e d t h e c o u n t r y . That w a s t h e y ea r t h e m a n f ro m t h e S o u t h h a d b e e n e l e c t e d P r e s i de n t, t h e m a n w h o h a d c l o s e d t h e s c h o o l s a n d b e g u n t h e enc la ve s. He h a d h a t e d t h a t smil ing ma n. W h e n t h e w a r w as o v e r , t h e Fe eps h a d c l o s e d t h e c o u r t s a n d built m o r e f e n c e s a n d h i d d e n b e h i n d t h e m . His o w n p e o p l e lived a n d so J o h n s o n ha d b e e n a h e r o. Ma ny 207
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p e o p l e d i e d a n d so J o h n s o n h a d b e e n Judas. But his way of life, t h e wa y t h a t h a d susta¡ríed him, was g o n e , v a n i s h e d with t h e wi nd . T h e r e w e r e w h i t e survivors living b e h i n d f e n c e s in a t h o u s a n d cities. T h e w h i t e s o n t h e i n si de w a t c h e d t h e blacks o n t h e o u t s i d e with high s u s p i c i o n , gave t h e m f o o d b e c a u s e it was safe a n d h u m a n e to d o so, p l o t t e d a b o u t t h e m a n d p ol iced t h e m with t h e a r m e d h e l i c o p t e r s t h a t p at r ol l e d t h e skies. The f o o d d o l e w a s e n o u g h t o s us t a i n life. T h e r e w e r e t i m e s w h e n J o h n s o n w o n d e r e d if it w as s u b t ly d r u g g e d with t r a nqui li z er s . Carryi ng t h e sack, h e w e n t d o w n t h e s m o g - h a z y s t r e et s , past a r o w of b u r n e d t h e a t e r s , t h e n pas t t h e a r e a w h e r e t h e c ol l e ge h a d o n c e s t o o d . It was h e r e , h e r e m e m b e r e d , h e ' d first s e e n t h e " c h i l d r e n . " O n e S u n d a y a y e ar o r so b ac k t h e y ha d rallied n u d e h e r e t o t h e s n i c k e r s of o n l o o k e r s . T h o u s a n d s of t h e m h a d p l a n t e d f er ns a n d tropical t r e e s o n t h e g r o u n d s of t h e col l e ge . J o h n s o n n o t e d t h a t t h e t r e e s a n d f e r ns ha d d i e d a nd t h a t r o u g h v e g e t a t i o n ha d t a k e n o v e r t h e o p e n s po t s. Halfway h o m e t h r e e m e n a c c o s t e d him. "You s t o p t h e r e , " o n e said, w a t c h i n g t h e sky for Feeps. "You g o t f o o d in t h a t sack, o ld m a n , " a n o t h e r d e c l a r e d . T he t h r e e f a n n e d a wa y f r om o n e a n o t h e r so t ha t h e c o u l d n ' t e s c a p e a r o u n d t h e m . " W e w a n t it." " T h e s e a r e b o o k s , " h e said. He se t t h e sack d o w n carefully and spread the ends so that the books could be seen. " Yo u just leave t h e m t h e r e . We'll look t h e m o v e r o u rs e l v e s . If t h e y ' r e g o o d e n o u g h to carry t h e n t h e y is v a lua ble . You g o o n , ol d m a n. G e t . " He s h o o k his h e a d d o g g e d l y a n d t h e i r faces m i r r o r e d s u r prise. T he offer h a d b e e n a l m o s t kind. " N o , " h e said. " N o t w i t h o u t my b o o k s . " He d r e w t h e longb a r r e l e d ol d Colt. " H e y , " o n e of t h e y o u n g o n e s said carefully, n o t really afraid yet, " o l d ma n g o t a g u n . " He e x a m i n e d J o h n s o n a n d t h e g un . " W o n d e r if him a n d it ca n s h o o t . " " I ' m g o i n g t o t a ke t h a t g u n , " a n o t h e r said, his e ye s w i d e n i n g , 208
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for g u n s w e r e p r i z e d a n d s car ce. "I n e e d it.” J o h n s o n w a t c h e d t h e m m o v e t o w a r d him a n d h e fired a s h o t into t h e p a v e m e n t in f r o nt of t h e m . All m o v e m e n t s t o p p e d . “ T h e next o n e g o e s in an e y e , " h e said. T h e t h r e e c o n s u l t e d w i t h o u t a w o r d . They t u r n e d away f rom him a n d l o p e d o n u p t h e s t r e e t w i t h o u t e v e r l o ok i n g back. He a r r a n g e d t h e b o o k s carefully o n t h e sh e l v e s , f e el in g satis faction. C ha r le s w a s n ' t a r o u n d a n d J o h n s o n d e c i d e d t h a t h e ' d p r o b a b l y g o n e u p t h e s t r e e t t o t r a d e r at ions with f ri e nd s , as h e o f te n did. He u n l o c k e d t h e b a s e m e n t d o o r a n d w e n t d o w n t h e stairs. T he c o n g r e g a t i o n h a d left, b u t t h e altar was intact. He e x a m i n e d t h e idol. It wa s q u i t e c r u d e . It wa s m a d e to t h e i r visualization of w h a t t h e y p r e t e n d e d t o t h i nk t h e y w e r e w o r s h i p i n g . The t h i n g h a d t o o m a n y legs a n d a r m s a n d t o o m u c h p e n i s t o b e h u m a n o i d . The h e a d ha d b e e n p a in t e d wi th th ic k black paint. He c o u l d n o t d e c i d e w h a t t o d o with t h e altar a n d t h e idol. T he w o r s h i p e r s really h u r t n o o n e b u t t h e m s e l v e s . T he y w e r e h a r m l e s s a n d t h e y e v e n e n j o y e d a c e r t a i n d e g r e e o f s af e ty b e c a u s e of t h e i r n u m b e r s . He h a d h e a r d t h a t t h e y h a d t h e ability t o t ur n a wa y t h o s e p e r v e r t s w h o m e r e l y w a n t e d t o us e available b o d i e s . At least t h a t was part of t h e st or y a b o u t t h e m . Yet it s e e m e d a w a st e . He s t o o d t h e r e r e a d y t o kick t h e idol a n d t h e altar d o w n , lock a n d b o a r d t h e w i n d o w . They w o u l d g o o n e l s e w h e r e . But if t h e y w e r e in t h e b a s e m e n t , t h e n n o o n e e ls e w o u l d b e t h e r e . He s h o o k his h e a d finally a n d left t h i n g s as t h e y w e r e . The religion was, after all, onl y a wish fulfillment, a t h i n g t h a t s o m e o n e ha d d r e d g e d o u t of t h e s t e a m i n g p a s t of black history. O n c e , l ong b e f o r e , in t h e jun gl es , t h e r e h a d b e e n a c rue l g o d . That g o d was n o w w a n te d , b e c a u s e t h e o t h e r g o d , t h e o n e t h e w h i t es h a d t a u g h t , was n o t for this t i m e a n d place. T h e w o r l d h a d w o r s e n e d a r o u n d t h e m a n d so t h e y h ad s o u g h t a c o r r i d o r b ac k t o t h e n e v e r - n e v e r land of fabl e, a di m s t o r y b o o k land w h e r e t h e s u n w a r m e d 209
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a n d f o o d fell f r o m t r e e s a n d all t h i ng s w e r e s i mp l e a n d f u n d a ment al. "Him." T h e c ol d m o n t h s w o u l d c o m e s o o n . Last y e a r fuel h a d b e e n in s h o r t s u p p l y a n d t h e p e o p l e h a d s uf f er ed . S o m e h ad di ed . He k n e w it w o u l d n o t ge t b e t t e r . Last w i n t e r h a d b e e n m e d i u m mild. This wi nt er ? He w e n t u pst ai rs, a wa it in g Ch ar l es . He g o t o u t a wellt h u m b e d c a s e b o o k a n d b e g a n t o r ead t o p ass t h e t i me . The r e a d i n g c a l m e d hi m. H e r e , in t h e b o o k , w h a t w a s h a p p e n i n g c o u l d n o t h a p p e n for t h e law w o u l d n o t allow o r c o n d o n e it. C h a r l es d i d n ' t c o m e . He w a l k e d u p t h e s t r e e t t o t h e t r a d i n g a r e a, b u t n o o n e h a d s e e n Ch a rl es . Back at t h e h o u s e t h e rifle w as in its a c c u s t o m e d p l ac e in a closet. Ch a rl e s s et g r e at s t o r e in t h e rifle, b u t s e l d o m c a rr i ed it. He w e n t t h r o u g h t h e e m p t y h o u s e restlessly. He p a u s e d at a c r a c k e d w i n d o w a n d s m e l l e d s o m e t h i n g sifting t h r o u g h t h e bars. It w as an o d o r h e ha d s m e l l e d b e f o r e , a f r i g h t e n i n g o d o r . He w e n t o u t into t h e s t r e e t a n d i n s p e c t e d t h e large a p a r t m e n t b u i ld i ng at t h e n e a r c o r n e r , t h e o n e of t h e c a n ni b al c o n ve r t s . He w as fairly c er ta in t h a t s m o k e c a m e fr om a c o r n e r w i n d o w , thi r d story. He felt very c ol d inside. He w a l k e d t o t h e a p a r t m e n t a n d w e n t u p li t tered stairs. He s a w n o o n e a n d t h e halls w e r e q u i e t , b u t t h e smell s e e m e d stronger. The d o o r was ajar. T h e r e w e r e t h r e e of t h e m i ns id e plus w h a t w as left of a f o u r t h . T h e t h r e e live o n e s w e r e hungri l y b r e w i n g s o m e t h i n g o v e r a small fire a n d t h e y h a d u s e d t h e ration f o o d f r o m C ha r l e s ' s b a g for part of it. Th ey l o o k e d u p in s u r p r i s e w h e n h e b u r s t t h r o u g h t h e d o o r . He s h o t t h e c l o s e s t o n e t h r o u g h t h e n o s e a n d t h e bul let b l e w o u t t h e b a c k of t h e m a n ' s h e a d . T he s e c o n d d r e w a very l o ng knife a n d l u n g e d t o w a r d him a n d J o h n s o n c a u g h t t h e m a n with a s h o t in t h e s t o m a c h a n d t h e f o r ce of t h e big-cal¡ber 210
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s lug b r u s h e d t h e m a n b a c k a n d b l o od i ly d o w n . T h e th ir d h a d g o n e for t h e o p e n w i n d o w . S h e w a s very y o u n g a n d lovely. J o h n s o n s h o t h e r as s h e s t r a d d l e d t h e w i n d o w . It w as n o t a killing s h o t a n d s h e s c r e a m e d all t h e wa y to t h e g r o u n d . Sil ence c a m e t h e n . He p i c ke d u p C ha r le s 's b o d y a n d ca rr ie d it o v e r his s h o u l d e r b a ck d o w n t h e st ep s. H e h e a r d rustling b e h i n d hi m, b u t no o n e b o t h e r e d him. All nig ht l o ng h e sat with t h e b o d y , u n a b l e t o cry, a bl e onl y t o r e m e m b e r t h e l o ng ye a rs , t h e t i m e h e h a d r e f u s e d t o lose b u t w h i c h C h a rl e s h a d s e n s e d wa s g o n e . In t h e m o r n i n g , dr ive n by thir st a n d a d e s i r e t o cl ean t h e body, he unlocked the basem ent and went down. T he y w e r e t h e r e . They a w a i t ed him. S o m e h o w t h e y k n e w . T he y h a d d u g a d e e p grave in t h e b a s e m e n t . He n o d d e d t o t h e m , a c c e p t i n g it, s e e i n g t h e invitation in t h e e y e s of t h o s e w h o h a d t i m e a n d w a n t for him. H e c l e a n e d t h e b o d y carefully a n d c ar r ie d it d o w n , w r a p p e d in a s h e e t . He b u r i e d it t h e r e in t h e b a s e m e n t a n d t h e " c h i l d r e n " s t o p p e d t h e i r sexual rituals a n d w a t c h e d a n d w a i te d r e s p e c t fully. W h e n h e w as d o n e h e w e n t b a c k upstairs. For a l on g t ime h e sat in t h e r o o m wit h t h e b o o k s w i t h o u t e v e r w a n t i n g to o p e n t h e m agai n, w i t h o u t b e li eving t ha t a n y t h i n g in t h e m h a d b e e n or w ould ever be true. He t o o k off all his c l o t h e s a n d f o u n d t h a t it wa s col d t h a t wa y a n d t h a t h e felt r i di cul ous. He e n d u r e d t h e feeli ngs a n d o p e n e d t h e b a s e m e n t d o o r again. T he y h a d g o n e . He w e n t b a c k u p s ta i rs a n d sat again for a l on g t i me , s e e i n g his s k in n y ol d legs, hairless a n d black, u n a b l e t o a c c e p t t h a t C h a r le s wa s really d e a d . A nd h e h e a r d t h e s o u n d . He o p e n e d t h e f r o n t d o o r caut iousl y. T h e s o u n d g r e w a n d g r e w . In m o m e n t s h e c o u l d s e e t h e n u d e a n d d a n c i n g black 211
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p e o p l e c o m i n g , m o v i n g in t h e d ir ec ti on of t h e w h i t e m a n ' s b o u n d a r y f e n c e , t h e f e n c e t h a t s e p a r a t e d black t o w n f r o m w h i t e t o w n , w h e r e t h e sign r ea d, STAY AWAY, NIGGER. At t h e f e n c e t h e y w o u l d all d i e f r o m F ee p h e l i c o p t e r m a c h i n e g u n s a n d b o m b s a n d jellied ga so l in e. An d t h e last of t h e w a r h e ha d only d e l a y e d w o u l d s o o n b e d o n e , a f o o t n o t e t o history. Outside they chanted, “ Him!" A tho usa nd times they chant ed, “ Him!" Th e w o r l d h a d d e c l a r e d for insanity l o n g ago. H e h a d s t o o d m o m e n t a r i l y in t h e way of t h a t insanity. N o w it was t i m e t o clear t h e path. He w a i t e d until t h e m o b swi rl ed past his d o o r a n d , still n u d e , h e j o i n e d t h e m . T h e r e w e r e t h o u s a n d s o n t h o u s a n d s of t h e m a n d t h e y s e e m e d t o b e w a t c h i n g a n d t u r n i n g a n d b o w i n g to s o m e t h i n g c o m i n g b e h i n d . In t h e t u m u l t of s o u n d a n d m o v e m e n t h e c o u l d n ' t s e e w h a t it was . Finally, at t h e last c o r n e r b e f o r e t h e f e n c e , h e a n c h o r e d hi ms e lf t o a light p o s t so t hat h e mi g ht s e e . It w a s n ' t j ust m e n t ha t h a d p r o m p t e d t h e riot. T h e t h i n g c a m e d o w n t h e s tr e e t a n d J o h n s o n c l u n g t o his p o s t in s h o ck . Up by t h e f e n c e t h e h e l i c o p t e r s s w a r m e d a n d p u b l ¡ c - ad d re s s hailers b l a r e d o r d e r s t h a t w e r e i g n o re d . T h e t h in g w a d d l e d d o w n t h e s t r e e t o n s q u a t legs. J o h n s o n wa s u n s u r e if it ran o n m o t o r s , w h e t h e r it wa s m a n - m a d e . T he “ c h i l d r e n " ha d lived in t h a t o ld a u t o plant. M a y b e t h e r e w e r e s o m e me c ha n ic al l y b r ig ht o n e s w h o h a d a s s e m b l e d it o u t of old parts. It was p o s si bl e. An y t hi n g w as p o s si b le . T he b o d y was h u g e a n d it was clad in bri ght r o b e s of fresh f lower s t hat hid its o b s c e n e m a l e n e s s onl y a little. T he h e a d t o w e r e d high a b o v e t h e c r o w d . Its d isci pl es ran a l o n g s i d e it, s o m e of t h e m falling a n d dy i ng u n d e r n e a t h it as it m o v e d a long. M a y b e t h e r e w e r e o t h e r g o d s , b u t this o n e w as t h e g o d for t his day, d e l a y e d six years. “ H i m " was w h a t t h e y c r a ve d a n d w a n t e d . “ H i m" h a d c h a n g e d t h e miser y of life t o t h e mi sery of d e a t h. The c r e a t u r e ha d s h i n i n g g l o b e s of lights for e ye s . T h e face 212
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wa s very old a n d ver y c r u d e a n d a l m o s t c o m p l e t e l y alien in for m. J o h n s o n a l l o w ed t h e c r o w d t o carry him a l on g. A h e a d of him t h e first w a ve c r a s h e d a ga in st t h e f e n c e . Fire b l o s s o m e d a r o u n d him as t h e b o m b s b e g a n t o fall. If t h e f e n c e c a m e d o w n t h e n m a y b e t h e h a t e d o n e s o n t h e o t h e r s ide c o u l d die t o o . He w a n t e d t o b e p r e s e n t at t h a t h a p p e n i n g a n d so h e p r e s s e d fo r wa rd . No m a t t e r h o w he w as t o re ce ive o r b e r e ce iv ed h e l a u g h e d a l o u d w h e n t h e c r e a t u r e ' s face t o w e r i n g a b o v e him c o u l d be m a d e o u t in t h e light of an e x p l o s i on t h a t s l o w e d it a n d b l ew away o n e s e c t i o n of g e ar s a n d cogs. Alien as it h a d b e e n m a d e , u n r e c o g n i z a b l e a n d c r u d e as it w as , h e felt k ins hi p with t h a t face. It was u n d e n i a b l y black. An e x p l os i on c a m e t h a t t o p p l e d t h e m b o t h a n d h e lay in fire a n d it b u r n e d his flesh a n d c h a r r e d his b o n e s . " H i m , " t h e " c h i l d r e n " c h a n t e d , m o v i n g o n . " H i m !" J o h n s o n e c h o e d wi th his d y in g b r e a t h .
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REVOLUTION
Revolution ROBIN SCHAEFFER
N o w t h e y w a n t t o c o nt r o l o u r m i nd s . It is n o t e n o u g h t ha t all of o u r activities a re m o n i t o r e d , t h a t o u r t h o u g h t s ar e s c r e e n e d s o t h a t t h e r e is n o t h i n g w e c an t h i n k t h a t is n o t instantly a c c e ss i b le t o t h e m , t h a t o u r lives ar e d i c t a t e d w ho l ly by t h e M a s te r s. N o w t h e y w a n t to d ic ta te t h e t h o u g h t s t h e m s elves. Th e y will filter into o u r b ra ins, via t h e e l e c t r o d e s , exactly w h a t w e a r e a ll o we d t o t h i n k at a ny t i me a n d will o r d e r o u r j u d g m e n t s . T h e r e is n o e n d t o t h e i r a r r o g a n c e a n d r e p r e s s i o n . All of t his c a m e t h r o u g h in t h e i r latest di r ecti ve d a t e d 5/12/96. S o m e of it is c o u c h e d in b u r e a u c r a t i c l a n g u a g e b u t t h e i r i n t e n tion is o b v i o u s . They will leave us n o t h i n g . The Ma s te r s will leave us n o t h i n g . I g o t o t h e Bu re au t o c o m p l a i n . "Listen h e r e , " I say at t h e main s c r e e n i n g d e s k , s h o w i n g t h e r e c e p t i o n i s t t h e di r ect ive, " y o u c a n ' t d o this t o us. W e ' r e a l l o w ed t o h ol d o n t o s o m e of o u r individuality. W h a t right d o y o u have to d o this? N o n e t h a t I can s ee. T h e r e have g o t t o b e s o m e limits." " O n e m o m e n t , " t h e r e c e p t i o n i s t says. S h e is a r o b o t , I k n o w , like all of t h e p e r s o n n e l at t h e B ur ea u b u t w e r e I n o t a w a r e of this I w o u l d t a k e h e r for h u m a n . T h e r e is a high gloss to h e r f e a t ur e s, a sp i nd ly full ness t o h e r u p p e r t o r s o t h a t m a k e s m e w a n t t o r e ac h a n d g r a s p . . . b u t I a m in c o n t r o l of my i mp u ls e s. No B ur ea u di r ecti ves a r e n e e d e d to w a r n m e a ga inst lust. "You c a n n o t file a c o m p l a i n t w i t h o u t p r o p e r identification. W h e r e is y o u r identi ficati on c a r d ? " "I d e s t r o y e d it," I say. I feel a s u r g e of p r i d e at t his; it is 214
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my first d e f i a n c e of t h e Bu r e au . In t r u t h I did n o t d e s t r o y my p a p e r s b u t have t h e m well h i d d e n in my h o m e u n d e r a pile of c l ot hi ng , w h i c h is a l m o s t t h e s a m e t hi ng . O n l y I c o u l d find t h e m . T he B u r e au ' s d e te c t i v e s w o u l d n o t k n o w w h e r e t o look. “ I m p o s s i b l e , " t h e r e c e p t i o n i s t says. She s u ff u se s , h e r skin b e c o m i n g m o t t l e d , a n d h e r t o r s o inflates. M o m e n t a r i l y s h e s e e m s i ndecisive a n d t h e n h e r c o l or r e t u r n s t o n o r m a l . "I c a n n ot t a k e y o u r c o m p l a i n t , " s h e says, "unt il y ou p r o d u c e p r o p e r ident ifi cati on. I h ave n o w c h e c k e d w it h my s u p e r v i s o r a n d this is p ol ic y. " "I insist, " I say, “ I insist u p o n m a k i n g my c o m p l a i n t k n o w n . " I lean a cr os s t h e d e s k , m a k e a t h r e a t e n i n g g e s t u r e . Al t h o u g h I a m o nl y fifteen y ea rs old I a m large for my a g e a n d have a c o m m a n d i n g physical p r e s e n c e o r s o I h a v e b e e n told. They c a n n o t s e n d m e a dir ect ive a n n o u n c i n g t ha t t h e y will c o nt r o l my m i n d w i t h o u t s o m e kind of s tr ug gl e. I t a k e p r i d e in this. I t a k e p r i d e in my d e t e r m i n a t i o n . " G e t m e y o u r s u p e r v i s o r , " I say. T h e r e c e p t i o n i s t s q u e a k s with d r e a d a n d p r e s s e s a lever. B e hi n d h e r d e s k a p a ne l s wi ngs o p e n a n d a n o t h e r m u c h larger r o b o t e n t e r s , this o n e m o d e l e d u p o n t h e male. It s i mu l at es a n g e r . " N o w w h a t is t h i s , " it says, s tr idi ng f or wa r d. "This j uv en il e t h r e a t e n e d m e , " t h e r e c e p t i o n i s t says. Be hind a pa lm, s h e s e e m s n o w t o b e smiling. " U n d e r p r o c e d u r e it was n e c e s s a r y — " "All ri gh t, " t h e m al e r o b o t says, " c o m e with m e . " An ar m s n a p s o u t , I feel e n o r m o u s p r e s s u r e a r o u n d my collar a n d t h e n , in t h e g r a s p o f this r o b o t , I a m p ul le d b e h i n d t h e d e s k a n d i nto t h e a r e a c l o s e d off by t h e p a n el . It is a small r o o m with t w o chairs a n d a d e sk . I a m p u s h e d d o w n into o n e of t h e chair s in a p os i t io n facing o u t w a r d ; as this h a p p e n s I g e t a g l a nc e of a m u s e d f aces l o o k i n g at m e f r om t h e r e c e p t i o n ar ea, s o m e of t h e m wavi ng. T h e r e h a d b e e n a very l ong line. The p a n e l s c lo se , lights c o m e on a n d I a m a l o n e with t h e r o b o t w h o a s s a u l t e d me . " W h a t is t h i s? " it says. " W h y a r e y o u m a k i n g th r e a t s agai nst 215
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t h e r e c e p t io n is t ? D o n ' t y ou u n d e r s t a n d t h e f u n c t i o n of t h e Bur eau? D o n ' t y o u k n o w t h e p e n a l t i e s — " " Yo u c a n ' t d o t h i s , " I say, c o m i n g right b a c k at t h e device. T he di r ect ive is still in my h a n d a n d I s h o w it. " You c a n ' t ge t a wa y with s o m e t h i n g like this. I c a m e in h e r e to p r o t es t . Th e se a re individual liberties y o u ' r e t a ki ng a wa y. " " You f o o l , " t h e r o b o t s a i d , " y o u m i s u n d e r s t a n d c o m p l e t e l y . " N e v e r t h e l e s s it b e c o m e s s e a t e d , l o o k in g at m e with w h a t I s u p p o s e is curiosity, r u b b i n g its p alms . " N o o n e ha s p r o t e s t e d , " it says. " T h a t d ir ect ive is t w o w e e k s o l d a n d n o o n e yet has c o m e t o t h e Bu r eau. N o w w h y of all t i m e s — " "It t o o k m e a wh i le t o g e t u p t h e c o u r a g e . You c a n ' t d o this t o us. You a l re a dy have c a m e r a s o n us all t h e t i m e telling y ou w h e r e w e a re a n d s c a n n e r s r e a d i n g o u r m i n d s so y ou k n o w e v e r y t h i n g w e t h i n k b u t w h e n y ou start t o c o nt r ol o u r very t h o u g h t s - " " You f o o l , " t h e r o b o t says again. "You p o o r fool. F o u r t e en year s o l d — " " I ' m fifteen. I'm g o i n g t o b e fifteen n ext w e e k so I'm as g o o d as f i f t e en . " "You p o o r c h i l d, " t h e r o b o t says a n d n o w it n o l o n g e r s e e m s angry, m e r e l y d i s t r e s s e d , " d o n ' t y ou k n o w w h e r e you are? D o n ' t y ou k n o w w h a t this is?" " Y e s , " I say, " thi s is t h e w o r l d , t h e w or l d t h a t y o u ' v e m a d e for us, o n e c o n t r o l l e d by a Bu re au t ha t r ea ds t h o u g h t s a n d tells us w h a t t o d o a n d k n o w s w h a t w e ' r e d o i n g all t h e t i m e s o t h a t it can c h e c k , a w o r l d w h e r e t h e Bur ea u n o w w a n t s t o tell us w h a t t o th in k a n d I w o n ' t live this w ay a n y mo r e . I c a n ' t s t a n d it. I h av e a lot of f r ie nd s w h o listen t o m e a n d w h o t h i n k t h e wa y I d o , a n d if y o u d o n ' t s t o p this o n y o u r o w n , " I say a n d p a u s e , t h e n g e t r e ad y t o m a k e t h e u lt i mat e t h r e a t of w h i c h I a m c a p a b l e , o nl y h o p i n g t h a t it is t h e t r u t h , "if yo u d o n ' t s t o p this, w e ' r e g o i n g t o have a r ev ol ut i o n. We'll o v e r t h r o w y o u . We'll o v e r t h r o w t h e B u r e a u !" I s h o u t a n d n o w t h e w o r d s a r e o u t a n d I h av e said t h e m a n d t h e r e is n o t h i n g m o r e I can say a n d s t r a ng e ly r elaxed I lean ba ck . But it is n o t 216
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onl y relaxation, par t of it is s h a m e . for h avi ng lost c o nt r o l a n d f or h avi ng t h a t t h a t c o nt r o l c an b r e ak . This is t h e m . T h e real re vo lut i on m u s t b e told.
I a m a s h a m e d of myself s h o w n t h e B u r e a u 's r o b o t n o t t h e w a y t o deal with u n d e r n e a t h , I h av e b e e n
" O h m y , " t h e r o b o t says, " o h my, you'll o v e r t h r o w t h e Bu re au . If o nl y y ou w o u l d . If o nl y s o m e o n e w o u l d . " It s t a n d s a n d e x t e n d s a h a n d . " C o m e , " it says, " c o m e t o the windo w. I want to sh o w you s o m e th in g ." Still h o l d i n g t h e dir ect ive, I s t a n d a n d t a k e t h e h a n d , allow myself t o b e m o v e d t o t h a t s p a ce . T h e r e is a s t r a n g e w a r m t h t o t h e h a n d of t h e c r e a t u r e a n d for r e a s o n s I d o n o t u n d e r s t a n d I a m m o v e d . Also I a m n o t q u i t e s u r e w h y I f o l l o we d t h e o r d e r t o s t a n d so readily b u t d e c i d e t h a t it m u s t have s o m e t h i n g t o d o with t h e c o nt r o l l i n g of my t h o u g h t s . Al ready t h a t is b e i n g p u t into a ct i on . Al ready t h e y can m a k e m e d o w h a t e v e r t h e y w a n t m e to d o , m a k e m e t hi n k w h a t t h e y will. " L o o k , " t h e r o b o t says, s h o w i n g m e t h e w o r l d o u t s i d e t h e w i n d o w . W e a r e at a slight incline in this B ur ea u office, on a little hillside s u r r o u n d e d by b o n e , a n d it is p o s s i bl e t o look d o w n h e r e u p o n t h e o ld city, t h e d u s t a n d a sh a n d little w hi te s h a p e s in t h e d i s t a n c e t h a t I u s e d t o t h i n k w e r e b o n e until I l e a r n e d of mi r age. " L o o k at t hat . Do y ou s e e t h a t? " " Y e s , " I say, my e y e s b e i n g t u g g e d u p w a r d by a n o t h e r of t h e d i s t u r b a n c e s in t h e sky; n o w birds a r e w h e e l i n g in t h e gray light, sq ua ll i ng t o o n e a n o t h e r , a n d h e r e , b e h i n d t h e m , c o m e t h e m e t e o r s again. They fall a r o u n d us, s o m e o f t h e m hitting t h e w i n d o w so h a r d t h a t I c an feel t h e collision a l t h o u g h t h e w i n d o w s a n d walls of t h e B ur ea u ar e very s t r o n g . "Yes, I s e e t hat . I've s e e n it all my life. So wh a t? So w h a t d o you w a n t t o s h o w me ? You still h av e n o right t o c o n t r o l my m i n d . " " O h m y , " t h e r o b o t says, " o h , my G o d , " a n d it is u nu s u a l to hear o n e of th e rob ots menti onin g G od, that s u p posedly n o par t of t h e i r p r o g r a m , b u t s t r a n g e r t h a n t h a t t o s e e o n e of t h e r o b o t s w e e p i n g b u t this r o b o t is w e e p i n g , a n d m o r e m e t e o r s h ¡ t t h e p a v e m e n t , t h e little w h i t e c l u m p s in t h e d is t an c e 217
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t h a t l o o k like b o n e s h i m m e r i n g a n d d a n c i n g t h r o u g h t h e h a z e like little s p e a r s , a sh s p e w i n g u p f ro m t h e o ld city in t h e w a k e of t h e m e t e o r w i n d s , t h e di recti ve f l a pp i ng in my h a n d , my t h o u g h t s a l re a d y c o n t r o l l e d , t h e r o b o t w e e p i n g , t h e city si nk ing, t h e B u r ea u s t a n d i n g . . .
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C hicago TH O M A S E MONTELEONE
Pinion w as in t h e m a i n t e n a n c e h a ng a r , r u n n i n g s o m e r o u t i n e c h e c k s o n his c o m p o n e n t s , w h e n h e w as s u m m o n e d by t h e City. ATTENTION. ALL UNITS FROM SECTORS 72-C AND 103-C. C H I C A G O IS IN NEED OF REPAIR. ACKNOWLEDGE. S o m e w h e r e i ns ide Pi ni on' s t e m p e r e d - s t e e l skull, a circuit r e s p o n d e d t o t h e c o m m a n d , s ince Pinion w as a Unit f ro m 103-C. “ This is Unit P i n io n ," h e said. "I a c k n o w l e d g e y o u r c o m m a n d , C h ic a go . I a m a Unit s pe c ia l i z e d in electrical e n g i n e e r i n g . W h a t is t h e difficulty?" UNIT PINION. C H I C A G O IS AWARE OF YOUR CLAS SIFICATION. D O N O T FLOOD MY INPUTS WITH USELESS DATA. PROCEED T O THE SECONDARY SHIELD. THERE IS A POWER FAILURE DUE TO A FAULTY GENERATOR. YOU WILL ASSIST IN REPLACING IT. Pinion c l o s e d off t h e c h a n n e l t o Ch i c a g o a n d s k it t e r ed o u t o f t h e h an g a r . As h e h e a d e d t o w a r d t h e s e c o n d a r y s hi e ld, he w o n d e r e d (as h e o f t e n did) a b o u t C hi ca go . He h ad always b e e n c u r i o u s as t o h o w C h i c a g o a c c u m u l a t e d all o f t h e i m m e n s e d a t a t h a t h e p o s s e s s e d . He w o n d e r e d if t h e City c o u l d actually s e e o b j e c t s in t h e s a m e m a n n e r as Pinion c o u l d s e e with his o m n i s p e c t r a l p h o t o e l e c t r i c e ye s. He k n e w t h a t C h i c a g o c o u l d “ s e n s e " e v e r y th in g , b u t h e ha d n e v e r a s c e r t a i n e d w h e t h e r or n o t t h e s e n s a t i o n s w e r e in t h e f or m of e l e c t r o n i c i mp u l s e s o r m a t h e m a t i c a l s y m b o l s , o r s o m e t h i n g akin t o t hat. It w as an i n t e r e s t i n g p r o b l e m t o c o n s i d e r , a n d Pinion t o o k 219
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g r e at d e li g h t in p o n d e r i n g p r o b l e m s o r q u e s t i o n s in w h i c h t h e s o l u t i o n did n o t a p p e a r t o b e readily available. P e r h a ps it w a s a f u n c t i o n of his p u r p o s e as a t r o u b l e s h o o t e r . Pinion s t r o d e u p t h e r a m p a n d b o a r d e d a Unit Elevator t h a t ca rr i ed him u p t o Level 12— o n e of t h e levels t h a t C h i c ag o h a d s a n c t i o n e d for Traffic. T h e d o o r s o p e n e d a n d h e s t e p p e d o u t o n t o a c o n c r e t e plat for m o v e r l o o k i n g a r ¡ b b o n w o r k of h u n d r e d s of l anes. Ch i c a g o 's Traffic j a m m e d t h e lanes, m ov i n g with i n cr e d i b l e s p e e d in e v e ry d ir e ct i o n , f r om o n e h o r i z on t o t h e o t h e r . Each s e g m e n t , o r “ c ar , " as C h ic a go r e f e r r e d to t h e m , w as a s e p a r a t e entity, e a c h p r o g r a m m e d t o its o w n specific d e s t i n a t i o n . T h e Traffic wa s e n d l e s s , as it h a d always b e e n in Pi ni on' s m e m o r y ; it n e v e r c e a s e d its cyclic, m o n o t o n o u s m o v e m e n t t h r o u g h o u t t h e day a n d night. N o n e of t h e Units like Pinion e v e r k n e w w h a t p u r p o s e t h e Traffic s e r ve d in Ch i c a g o 's over-all s c h e m e , n o r did t h e y e v e r k n o w w h e r e it w a s always goi n g . T h e y only k n e w t ha t it was j us t o n e small part of C h i c a g o, a n d t h a t it m u s t b e m a i nt a i n e d . As Pinion w a l k e d a l o n g b e s i d e t h e Traffic lanes, he n o t i c e d t h a t t h e lights in t h e s o a r i n g b u i ld i ng s a n d t o w e r s w e r e w i n k i ng o u t . C h i c a g o was n o w e n t e r i n g a Day Peri od. For s o m e u n k n o w n r e a s o n , o n a perfectl y t i m e d cycle, t h e City t u r n e d its illuminat i on o n a n d off w i t h o u t e n d . Pinion acti vat ed a m e m o ry b a n k t o r e m i n d hi ms el f t o q u e s t i o n C h i c a g o a b o u t s o m e of t h e s e s t r a n g e f u n c t i o n s of t h e City. But for t h e m o m e n t , h e m u s t p e r f o r m his f u n c ti on as a m a i n t e n a n c e r o bo t. By t h e t i m e h e r e a c h e d t h e s e c o n d a r y s hie ld, o t h e r Units h a d a lr ea dy arrived a n d ha d b e g u n t o r e m o v e t h e n o n f u n c t i o n ing g e n e r a t o r . Pinion s a w t h e i r g re at steel b o d i e s s h i n i n g in t h e dull light t h at w as filtered t h r o u g h t h e shie lds fr om t h e O u t s i d e . T h e Units d o i n g t h e actual w o r k of d i s m a n t l i n g t h e m a c h i n e r y w e r e bi p ed a l r o b o t s like himself, a n d h e also n o t i c e d t h a t s o m e Carr¡er-Un¡ts w e r e a d v a n c i n g to t h e b a s e of t h e s h i el d, b e a r i n g t h e n e c e s s a r y r e p l a c e m e n t parts. Bef or e h e b e g a n w o r k , h e a d d r e s s e d C h i c a go in t h e c u s t o m ary m a n n e r . "This is Unit Pinion. I a m n o w available f or w o r k . " 220
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ACKNOWLEDGE. UNIT PINION. PROCEED AS PREVIOUSLY ORDERED. Pinion n o t i c e d t hat , at t h e s a m e m o m e n t h e w as r e p o r t i n g in, o t h e r Units w e r e d o i n g likewise. Ch i c a g o , h e t h o u g h t , was an a m a z i n g entity, c a p a b l e of p e r f o r m i n g millions of di ff er en t f u n c t i o n s at o n c e . T h e r e w as m u c h t h a t h e w o u l d s o m e d a y like to learn a b o u t t h e City. An d s o it w e n t for m a n y l o n g year s. Pinion w o r k e d in servi ce t o C h i c a g o , r ep l ac in g w o r n - o u t par ts, d e s i g n i n g n e w e r a n d b e t t e r o n e s , always t h i n k i n g of q u e s t i o n s t o ask C h i c a g o , b u t n e v e r f in di ng t h e t i me t o actually ask t h e m . T h e City w as always in m o t i o n , like a gi ant p i e c e o f kinetic s c u l p t u r e t h a t Pinion a n d t h e o t h e r s h a d b e e n c o m m i s s i o n e d t o ma int ai n. Ch i c a g o w a s an e n o r m o u s , s pr awl i ng m e c h a n i s m , s t r e t c h i n g as far as t h e r o b o t c o u l d s e e in any d ir e ct i o n . O n e da y Pinion w as s u m m o n e d t o a S e c t or of t h e City t h a t he had ne ve r seen before. UNIT PINION. YOU WILL PROCEED TO SECTOR 14-A IMMEDIATELY. I SENSE A FAILURE IN A TEMPERATURE CON T RO L CIRCUIT. YOU WILL CORRECT THE PROBLEM. In o r d e r t o r e a c h S e c t o r 14-A, Pinion h a d t o travel into t h e d e e p e s t levels of t h e City. He p a s s e d a re as w h e r e C h ic a go h a d n e w s e g m e n t s of Traffic b e i n g m a n u f a c t u r e d a n d fed into t h e m a i n s t r e a m . He saw t h e a re a s t h a t c o l l e ct e d w a t e r a n d p u m p e d it into t h e s e w e r s y s t e m s t ha t w e r e laced t h r o u g h o u t t h e b o w e l s o f C h i c a g o . He also s a w w h e r e all r e p l a c e m e n t parts w e r e m a d e a n d t h e o l d parts w e r e c o l l e c t e d , r ecycl ed, a n d m a d e again. T h e r e wa s also a p la ce w h e r e Pinion saw C h i c a g o m a k i n g n e w Units like hi ms e l f a n d s e n d i n g t h e m into n e w S e ct o r s of t h e City. He p a s s e d t h e s o u r c e of e n e r g y t h a t p o w e r e d all t h e c o m p o n e n t s of C h i c a g o — t h e g r e at fusi on r e a c to r s t ha t w e r e c o n s t a n t l y m o n i t o r e d by C h i c ag o a n d m a i n t a i n e d by Units like Pinion. He w a l k e d t h r o u g h a long, e m p t y c o r r i d o r t h a t o p e n e d into S e c t o r 14-A. "This is Unit Pinion. I a m n o w available for w o r k . " 221
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UNIT PI NI ON. YOU WILL REPLACE THE TEMPERATURE C ON TRO L CO N SO LE IN THIS SECTOR. I SENSE THAT THERE HAS ALREADY BEEN A DRASTIC RISE IN THE TEMPERATURE. IT MUST BE CORRECTED IMMEDIATELY. T he m e s s a g e was r e c o r d e d in Pi ni on' s circuitry, b u t h e w a s n ' t actually listening. He h a d just e n t e r e d t h e S e c t o r as C h i c a g o a d d r e s s e d hi m, a n d h e wa s n o w st ari ng in b e w i l d e r m e n t at t h e s t r a n g e sight. He w a s s t a n d i n g in t h e e n t r a n c e t o a large, circular r o o m , t h e ceiling o f w h i c h w as far a b o v e Pi ni on' s h e a d . T h e r e was a sign a b o v e t h e e n t r a n c e w h i c h r e a d : C O O K COUNTY CRYOGENIC REMISSION CENTER. Al on g t h e walls w e r e glass t a n ks , t h o u s a n d s o f t h e m , o nl y six f e e t long, a n d in e a c h o n e , Pinion c o u l d m a k e o u t a small figure of a pale c o l o r , f o r m e d in a s h a p e ver y similar t o t h a t of a Unit. Pinion was tr uly p u z z l e d . " C h i c a g o , this is Unit Pinion. I'm sor ry for t h e u n s c h e d u l e d c o m m u n i c a t i o n , b u t I m u s t a sk y o u a q u e s t i o n . " T h e r e w a s a slight p a u s e b e f o r e h e r e c ei ve d a r e s p o n s e . YOU WISH TO ASK C H I C A G O A QUESTION? THAT IS NO T YOUR FUNCTI ON. UNIT PINI ON. PROCEED WITH THE TASK AS ORDERED. Pinion' s circuits c licked a n d f la she d. He c o u l d n o t allow this o p p o r t u n i t y to pass. " C h i c a g o , p l e as e . A w o r d wi th y o u b e f o r e I b e gi n. W h a t is this pl ac e t h a t I h av e e n t e r e d ? I have n e v e r s e e n a n y t h i n g like t his b e f o r e . W h a t ar e t h e little Units in t h e glass c a s e s ? " UNIT PINION. WHY D O Y OU WISH TO KNOW? "I a m c u r i o u s . . . I s u p p o s e t h a t is t h e w o r d t o d e s c r i b e my r e a s o n . " YOU ARE AN EXTRAORDINARY UNIT. UNIT PINION. VERY WELL. YOU SHALL K N O W . YOU ARE IN A CRYOGENIC STATION. THE UNITS IN THE CASES ARE CALLED " M AN ." TH EY ARE BEING PRESERVED BY MEANS OF EXTREMELY COLD TEMPERATURES. T h e r e w as a p a u s e as Pinion e x p e c t e d m o r e i nf o r m at i o n, b u t C h i c a g o wa s silent. Finally t h e r o b o t s p o k e , still l o ok ing 222
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at t h e tiny figures in glass. “ W h a t is ' m a n / C hi c ag o ? W h y ar e they being preserved?" " M A N " IS THE REASON FOR C H I C A G O ' S EXISTENCE. FOR YOUR EXISTENCE. C H I C A G O HAS PRESERVED THEM FOR A LONG TIME. SOMEDAY THEY WILL BE REVIVED T O LIVE AGAIN. T h e r e was a slight p a u s e . I SENSE THAT TIME IS N O W CRUCIAL. UNIT PINION. YOU MUST CORRECT THE FAULTY CONS OLE N O W OR THE MEN WILL N O T BE PRESERVED. YOU ARE ORDERED TO COMPLETE YOUR TASK IMMEDIATELY. Pinion rel uct antl y c l o s e d t h e c h a n n e l t o C h i c a g o a n d w e n t a b o u t his a s s i g n m e n t . T h e a n s w e r s t h a t C h i c a g o h a d given him h a d o nl y o p e n e d u p n e w a v e n u e s of t h o u g h t t h a t e n d e d in many more questions. As h e r e p l a c e d t h e c o n s o l e a n d p l u g g e d in t h e little de vi ce h e c ar r ie d o n his tool b e lt t o c h e c k its capabi l it i es, h e n o t i c e d m o v e m e n t in o n e of t h e glass ca se s. O n e of t h e m e n , lying flat, m o v e d its legs a n d fl exed m u s c l e s t h at h a d n ' t m o v e d in e o n s . He q uickl y c h e c k e d t h e c o n s o l e , u n p l u g g e d his t oo l s a n d a cti va te d its circuits. T h e c o n s o l e h u m m e d i nto life a n d he felt C h i c a g o o p e n u p a c o m m u n i c a t i o n c h a n n e l t o him. UNIT PINION. ACKNOWLEDGE COMPLETION OF TASK. RETURN T O THE MAINTENANCE HANGAR. "T as k c o m p l e t e d , C h i c a g o . " But s o m e t h i n g was w r o n g . Pinion d i d n ' t r e s p o n d t o t h e c o m m a n d . His a t t e n t i o n was fixed o n t h e m a n in t h e c ase. The figure was fully a w a k e n o w , a n d it was st ru g g l in g a g a in st t h e glass walls o f t h e coffinlike c ase. Pinion knel t d o w n o n his long, s pi n dl y legs a n d p e e r e d t h r o u g h t h e glass at t h e figure, w h i c h r e c oi l e d in h o r r o r at t h e sight of t h e i m m e n s e r o b ot . Pinion was c o n f u s e d . He k n e w t h a t h e s h o u l d c o n t a c t C h i c a go a n d tell it of t h e m i s t a k e — t h a t o n e o f t h e m e n h a d b e e n a cc i d e nt al l y revived. But h e d id n o t call t h e City. His cur iosi ty h a d a h i g h e r priority. He i n s p e c t e d t h e c as e in w h i c h t h e f igur e wa s e n c l o s e d a n d n o t i c e d t w o small, d el ic at e locks a t 223
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t a c h e d t o h i n g e s t h a t o p e n e d o u t w a r d . He p r o d u c e d a n e e d l e l¡ke i n s t r u m e n t f r o m his tool kit a n d p ri ed o p e n t h e hi nge s. The ma n i n c h e d into t h e b ac k of t h e case, tryi ng to e l u d e Pinion' s p r o b i n g fingers. As his metallic h a n d t o u c h e d t h e m a n, it s c r e a m e d . T h e s o u n d wa s soft a n d h i g h - p i t c h e d t o Pinion' s receptors. D e s p i t e t h e m a n ' s st r u g gl in g s, Pinion g r a s p e d it firmly in his h a n d a n d lifted it fr om t h e c ase. W h a t s o r t of t h i n g was t his " m a n ” ? He b r o u g h t it c l o s e t o his face so t h a t h e c ou l d e x a m i n e it m o r e closely. It m o v e d u n d e r its o w n p o w e r s o u r c e , was m a d e of s o m e s or t of soft, p ul s a t in g s u b s t a n c e t h a t d i d n' t s e e m t o b e a n y t y p e of metal at all, a n d ha d l on g b l o n d f il ament s s t r e a m i n g f r om its h e a d . T h e c l o s er h e b r o u g h t t h e m a n to his face, t h e m o r e it s t r u g g l e d a n d s c r e a m e d , a n d t h e m o r e details Pinion n o t i c e d in it. T h e f ace was soft a n d s m o o t h a nd h a d t w o b r i g h t- b lu e e ye s a n d a p r o t r u d i n g s t r u c t u r e b e l o w t h e m . T h e r e was also a pi nk slit b e l o w t h e e ye s a n d o t h e r s t r u c t u r e t h a t s e e m e d to m o v e in c o n j u n c t i o n with t h e s c r ea m s. T he face w a s va gu el y similar t o Pinion' s o w n , in a g r o t e s q u e s o r t of way. T he b o d y was also s m o o t h , having t w o a r m s a n d long, lean legs. In t h e c e n t e r of t h e c h e s t , Pinion n o t i c e d t w o soft h e m i s p h e r e s c a p p e d by p i nk circular tips. At t h e j u n c ti o n of t h e legs, h e c o u l d s e e a tiny slit b e n e a t h a t ri angl e of b l o n d fluff. Pinion c o u l d feel t h e w h o l e b o d y of t h e m a n t r e m b l i n g in his h a n d . He c o u l d h e a r a v o ic e s p e a k i n g t o him, n o t s c r e a m ing as b e f o r e . " W h a t are y o u ? " said t h e m a n . " A n d w h e r e a m I?" "I am Unit Pinion. You a re in t h e City of C h i c a g o . " The r o b o t w a n t e d t o say s o m e t h i n g else, b u t h e was so st art led by t h e c o n c e p t of c o m m u n i c a t i n g with t h e small b e i n g t h a t h e was at a loss for w o r d s . " C h i c a g o ? W h a t y ea r is it?" "Year ?" " T h e d a t e , " said t h e c r e a t u r e . " H o w long h av e I b e e n f ro z e n ? " T h e m a n s e e m e d t o h av e r el axed s o m e w h a t , having s e n s e d t h at Pinion m e a n t n o ha r m.
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"I c a n n o t a n s w e r y o u r q u e s t i o n , M a n , " said Pinion slowly. "I a m n o t familiar with t h e t e r m s you h av e u s e d . But C h ic a go has t ol d m e t ha t y ou a n d t h e o t h e r s h a ve b e e n wit hi n t h e s e c a se s for a l ong ti me. T h e r e has b e e n a— " "I a m n o t a m a n , " said t h e c r e a t u r e , as it b r o u g h t itself to a k n e e l i n g pos it ion in Pinion' s g r e at steel pal m. Pinion' s circuits w e r e reeling. Had n o t C h i c a g o sa id t h a t t h e s e c r e a t u r e s w e r e " m a n " ? C h i c ag o w as always c o r r e c t . " T h e r e m u s t b e s o m e m i s t a k e , " h e said. " T h e City t o l d m e t h a t y o u were indeed a man." T he c r e a t u r e t o s s e d b a c k its h e a d a n d l a u g h e d . " O h , I s e e it n o w . I b e l o n g t o t h e r ace of ' m a n , ' b u t I myself a m a w o m a n . There's quite a difference, you know ." Pinion w a s m o r e c o n f u s e d t h a n e ve r. He h a d t o resist t h e temptation to contact Chicago so that the incident could be clarified. " ' W o m a n ' ? That is d i f f e re n t f ro m ' m a n ' ? W h a t is 'race'?" " W e a re all m e n , ” said t h e girl, p o i nt i n g t o t h e ro ws of b o d i e s wi thin t h e glass. " T ha t is t h e n a m e of o u r kind. And w e a re s e p a r a t e d into t w o . . . t y p e s — o n e called m a n , t h e o t h e r , like m e , cal led w o m a n . I k n o w it's c o n f u s i n g , b u t it's just t h e n a t u r e of l a n g u a g e . I h o p e y o u u n d e r s t a n d . " " P i n i o n can u n d e r s t a n d a ny t h in g . T h e r e is a n a n a l o g u e in my o w n kind. W e ar e called Units, a n d t h e r e a re d i f f er en t ty pe s of Units wi th in o u r kind, d e p e n d i n g u p o n w h a t o u r f u n c tion is in t h e City." " Y o u r n a m e is P inion? " "Yes." " Ve ry w e l l, " said t h e girl. " M y n a m e is M¡r¡a. Can y ou tell m e w h y I h av e b e e n revived? W h e r e a re t h e d o c t o r s ? " Pinion tilted his h e a d as h e r e g a r d e d t h e w o m a n ' s q u e s t i o n s . " I ' m afraid I d o n ' t k n o w w h a t y o u a r e talking a b o u t . I was s e n t h e r e by C h i c a g o t o r ep a ir a faulty c o m p o n e n t in this Sector. C h i c a g o said t h a t t h e t e m p e r a t u r e was rising a n d — " " W h o is C h i c a go ? C a n I s e e him? I w o u l d like t o talk to him. P e r h a p s h e c an tell m e w h a t ' s g o i n g o n a r o u n d h e r e . " Pinion w as t a k e n a b a c k by t h e girl's w o r d s . It w a s clear t ha t 225•
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s h e did n o t k n o w w h a t Ch i c a g o was . " S e e C h i c a g o ? " h e a s k e d . "Mir¡a, y o u a re in s id e C h i c a g o . C h i c a go is t h e City." Th e girl's e y e s s a d d e n e d . "But y o u said C h i c a g o s p o k e to y o u . . ." "It d o e s . It s p e a k s t o all t h e Units w h e n e v e r t h e r e is s o m e t h i n g it w i s h e s us t o d o . It is o u r m a s t e r . " "You m e a n t h e City s p e a k s t o y o u ? " "Yes, of c o u r s e . " " Bu t h o w ? " "I d o n o t k n ow . I o nl y k n o w t h a t it d o e s . C h i c a g o is everywhere, sensing everything." "You m e a n a c o m p u t e r ? " "I d o n ' t k n o w w h a t a c o m p u t e r is, Miria. " " M a y I s p e a k t o C hi c a g o ? " "I d o n ' t t h i n k so. I r ecei ve its c o m m a n d s by m e a n s of e l e c t r o m a g n e t i c w av e s. You d o n o t s e e m t o b e e q u i p p e d for s u c h communication." "W el l, w h a t a r e y o u g o i n g t o d o with me? Yo u 'v e revived me, haven't you?" "I t h i n k t h a t y o u r revival wa s acc ide nt al . C h i c a g o did n o t o r d e r it s o . " " D o e s C h i c a g o k n o w t h a t this h a p p e n e d ? " "I d o n ' t t h i n k so. Do y ou wish t h a t I c o n t a c t C h i c a g o ? " "Yes. An d wh ile y o u ' r e d o i n g it, w o u l d y ou p l e a s e let m e d o w n ? It's b e e n a l o n g t i m e s i nc e I've b e e n a bl e t o s t a n d up, yo u k n o w . " Pinion g ent l y l o w e r e d h e r t o t h e floor a n d w a t c h e d h e r lithe m o v e m e n t s as h e o p e n e d a c h a n n e l to Ch i c a go . T h e girl s t o o d at his s ide, a r c h i n g h e r ba ck , s t r e t c h i n g o u t h e r tiny f o r m. Pinion n o t i c e d t h e t w o h e m i s p h e r e s o n h e r c h e s t c u r v e u p w a r d as s h e p e r f o r m e d this m a n e u v e r . " C h i c a g o . This is Unit Pinion. I h av e a p r o b l e m in S e c t or 14-A." UNIT PINION. C H I C A G O KNOWS THAT YOU HAVE NO T LEFT SECTOR 14-A. STATE THE NATURE OF YOUR DIFFICULTY. " O n e of t h e m e n w a s a cc id e n t a l l y revived d u r i n g t h e repairs 226
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t o t h e t e m p e r a t u r e c o nt r o l c o n s o l e . The m a n says t h a t s h e is a w o m a n called Miria. I await y o u r i n s t r u c t i o n s . " T h e r e wa s a slight p a u s e , a n d Pinion k n e w t h at t o b e C hi c ag o m a k i n g its d ec i si on s . THE W O M A N MUST BE RETURNED T O HER TANK. C H I CA G O' S TAPES D O N O T HAVE SUCH A CONTI NGENCY IN THE PROGRAM. Pinion w a s b o t h s u r p r i s e d a n d c o n f u s e d . He r e c ei ve d t h e c o m m a n d , b u t h e n o t i c e d t hat , for t h e first t i m e , h e also r e c e i v e d w h a t s e e m e d like a rati onal izat ion f r om C h ic a go t o explain t h e c o m m a n d . "I will of c o u r s e d o as y o u c o m m a n d , C h i c a g o. But I w o u l d like a f e w w o r d s with y o u first. W h a t — " Y OU ARE AN EXTRAORDINARY UNIT. UNIT PINION. C H I C A G O HAS N O OTHER UNITS LIKE YOU. "I d o n ' t u n d e r s t a n d , C h i c a g o . " YOU ASK QUESTIONS. IT IS N O TT H E FUNCTI ON OF UNITS TO ASK QUESTI ONS. WHY D O YOU PERSIST IN SUCH ACTIONS? "I h av e s i mpl y c o m e u p o n t h i n g s t ha t I d o n o t fully u n d e r s t a n d , a n d I wish to k n o w t h e m . If I c a n k n o w t h e m b e t t e r , I will b e a bl e t o s e rv e y o u b e t t e r . " WHAT ARE YOUR QUESTIONS? " C h i c a g o , n e v e r until n o w h av e I q u e s t i o n e d t h e p u r p o s e o f my e x i s t e n c e , o r y o u r e x is t e n c e . But n o w I feel t ha t I m u s t d o s o. W h y d o I exist, o t h e r t h a n t o s er ve y o u ? In o t h e r w o r d s , w h y d o e s C h i c a g o exist? You said b e f o r e t h a t ' m a n ' is t h e r e a s on for o u r e x i s te n c e . Please e x pl a i n . " " M A N " BUILT C H I C A G O . UNIT PINION. A LONG TIME A G O . BY HIS O W N MEASUREMENT OF TIME. MILLIONS OF YEARS A G O . THEY BUILT ME FOR THEM TO EXIST WITHIN. C H I C A G O WAS GIVEN THE POWER AND THE MEANS T O MAINTAIN ITSELF INDEFINITELY. WHI CH C H I C A G O HAS, INDEED, DONE. THAT IS THE PURPOSE OF EXISTENCE: T O BE MAINTAINED. " Bu t t h e r e a re n o m e n h e r e n o w , " said Pinion. " T h e r e a re 227
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n o n e e x c e p t t h e f e w w h o a re e n c a s e d in Se c to r 14-A. W h e r e a re t h e m e n ? ” C H I C A G O DOES N O T KNOW. MANY YEARS A G O . UNIT PINION. BEFORE YOU WERE ASSEMBLED. " M A N " LEFT C H I C A G O. BUT C H I C A G O HAS REMAINED FUNCTI ONI NG. "I t h i n k I u n d e r s t a n d , " said Pinion, as h e c l o s e d t h e c h a n n e l . He l o o k e d d o w n at t h e girl, w h o was k n e e l i n g b e s i d e him. He said t o h e r, " C h i c a g o has o r d e r e d t h a t y ou b e r e t u r n e d to th e case ." " R e t u r n e d ? " said Mir¡a. " B u t y o u c a n ' t d o t hat. T he y told m e t h a t w h e n I w o k e u p , I w o u l d b e c u r e d . " T h e girl b u r i ed h e r face in h e r h a n d s . "I c an o nl y d o as I a m o r d e r e d t o d o , " said t h e r o b o t as h e deftly s c o o p e d u p t h e girl f ro m t h e floor of S e c t o r 14-A a n d r e t u r n e d h e r t o t h e glass c ase. S he s c r e a m e d a n d p l e a d e d with him, a n d s o m e w h e r e in his circuitry, h e felt t h e u r g e t o resist C h ic a g o ' s c o m m a n d ; b u t h e k n e w t h a t h e c o u l d not. With his n e e d l e i n s t r u m e n t , h e r e p l a c e d t h e locks a n d s t r o d e f r o m t h e r o o m . Pa us i ng at t h e exit, h e t u r n e d t o look b ac k at Mir¡a, h e r face p r e s s e d u p a ga ins t t h e f r o nt of t h at c as e , l o o k i n g at hi m, h e r fist p o u n d i n g o n t h e glass. S o m e t i m e later, Pinion w as n o t exactly s u r e h o w long, h e r e ce i v e d a n o t h e r c o m m a n d f r o m C h i c a g o t o r e t u r n to Sector. 14-A. He i m m e d i a t e l y t h o u g h t of Miria, t h e s t r a n g e little c r e a t u r e t ha t h e h a d m e t t h e r e . "This is Unit Pinion. I a c k n o w l e d g e y o u r c o m m a n d , C hi ca go. W h a t is t h e difficulty?" THERE HAS BEEN A STRUCTURAL FAILURE IN SECTOR 14-A. PLEASE CORRECT AT ONCE. As Pinion p r o c e e d e d t o t h e C r y o g e n i c Re mi ss ion C e n t e r h e t h o u g h t of s e e i n g Miria agai n, e v e n t h o u g h s h e w o u l d b e a s l e e p this ti me . He e n t e r e d t h e r o o m a n d r e a d i e d his tool kit for t h e repair w o r k w h e n h e n o t i c e d t h e c a u s e of t h e failure. The c a se in w h i c h h e h a d p l a ce d Miria wa s c r a c k e d a c r o ss its glass fr o n t , p r o b a b l y d u e to t h e bl o ws of h e r fist. 228
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Pinion p e e r e d i nto t h e c as e , h o p i n g t o s e e Miria, b u t all t h a t r e m a i n e d was s o m e c r u m b l i n g b o n e s . Pinion d e c i d e d to c o n t a c t C hi ca go . " C h i c a g o , this is Unit Pinion. I h av e l oc a te d t h e st ructural failure a n d I s e e t h a t t h e w o m a n has d is i n t e g r a t e d . S h e is q u i te d i f f er en t f ro m t h e o t h e r s . Again, I m u s t tell y o u t ha t I d o n ' t understand." UNIT PINION. C H I C A G O 'S SENSORS INDICATE A SLOW LOSS OF ATMOSPHERE IN THE W O M A N ' S TANK. THIS RESULTED IN DEATH, AND D E CO MP OS I T I ON . " W h a t is ' d e a t h , ' C h i c a g o ? " DEATH IS THE END OF EXISTENCE. IT IS PART OF THE DESIGN THAT ALL LIVING THINGS MUST ENDURE. T h e r e w as a p a u s e b e f o r e t h e City c o n t i n u e d . UNIT PINION. REPLACE THE FAULTY C O M P O N E N T IMMEDIATELY. C H I C A G O HAS DISPATCHED CLEANINGUNITS TO SECTOR 14-A. THEY WILL ARRIVE S O O N . From this, Pinion r e a s o n e d t h a t C h i c a g o d id n o t wi sh to c o n t i n u e t h e c o n v e r s a t i o n , s o h e s e l e c t e d t h e p r o p e r t o ol s a n d r e m o v e d t h e glass f r o nt f r om t h e c r y o g e n i c ta nk . S e l e c ti ng a n e w p a n e fr om a Carr¡er-Unit, h e a t t a c h e d it t o t h e tiny h inges. Several t i me s d u r i n g t h e j ob , h e j a r re d t h e t an k, a n d e a c h ti me , h e n o t i c e d several flakes o f d u s t c r u m b l e fr om Miria's skeleton. It w a s an o d d , a l m o s t d i s t u r b i n g sight. T he last t i me he h a d e n t e r e d t h e S e c t or t h e b o n e s w e r e par t o f a living, a l m o st beaut if ul c r e a t u r e . N o w t h a t c r e a t u r e w as g o n e . Miria g o n e . Pinion' s circuits r e b e l l e d a ga in st t h e w h o l e c o n c e p t of d e a t h . At t h a t m o m e n t , t w o Cl ea ni ng -Un¡ t s a m b l e d into t h e C r y o g e n i c Re mis sion C e n t e r . O n e of t h e m o p e n e d t h e glass t a nk , e x t e n d e d a flexible v a c u u m h o s e , a n d s u c k e d u p t h e r e ma i ns . T he o t h e r s p r a y e d a light mist of d i s i n f e c ta n t liquid into t h e n o w e m p t y t a nk . Finishing wi th q u i c k efficiency, t h e t w o Units left t h e Sect or. Pinion called C h i c a g o a n d a c k n o w l e d g e d c o m p l e t i o n of t h e t ask, a n d t h e City r ep li ed wit h its usual i n d i f f e r en c e by o r d e r i n g 229
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him b a c k t o t h e m a i n t e n a n c e ha ng a r. As h e left, h e c o u l d n o t s t o p t h i n k i n g a b o u t t h e y o u n g girl w h o ha d d i e d . H o w l on g d u r i n g t h e u n k n o w n m a n -y e ar s s i nc e h e h a d last s e e n he r had s h e b e e n d e a d ? S o m e t i m e b a c k t h e n , s h e ha d b e e n a s o u r c e of p u z z l e m e n t a n d also g r o w i n g in te r es t, b u t n o w Pinion ha d w i t n e s s e d a c o l d, u n f e e l i n g r e mo v a l of all t h a t was left of her. T h e w h o l e s c e n e left Pinion wit h a f ee li ng of i n c o m p l e t e n e s s . He d e c i d e d t h a t i n st e ad of r e t u r n i n g t o t h e h a n g a r h e w o u l d c o n s u l t C h i c a g o ' s g r e at Library. He ha d b e e n t h e r e several t i me s in t h e pas t t o p e r f o r m m i n o r repai rs a n d h e h a d l e a r n e d t h at it w as an e n o r m o u s d e p o s i t o r y of i n f o rm at io n . H e re , r e a s o n e d Pinion, h e w o u l d find t h e a n s w e r s t h a t C h i c a g o h a d n e g l e c t e d (or r ef us ed ) t o give him. A nd so Pinion s p e n t m a n y y ea rs in t h e d e p t h s of C h i c a g o ' s Library, d i ge s t in g t h o u s a n d s o f t a p e s a b o u t t h e s t r a n g e c r e a t u r e : m a n. I n n u m e r a b l e t i me s d u r i n g his r e s e a r c h h e was i n t e r r u p t e d by c o m m u n i c a t i o n f r om t h e City t ha t w o u l d s e n d him t o f a r - re ac h in g Se ct or s. Each t i me , h e p e r f o r m e d his d u t i e s w i t h o u t q u e s t i o n , b u t h e always r e t u r n e d t o t h e Library w h e n e v e r t i m e all owe d. Pinion l e a r n e d m a n y t hi ng s . At o n e t i m e , in t h e d i s t a nt past, C h i c a g o h a d b e e n filled with m e n — ever y S ec to r a n d Level to capacity. T h e s e m e n , w h o h a d c o n c e i v e d a n d actually built C h ic a go , w e r e c r e a t u r e s of s e e m i n g l y u n l i mi t e d i ma gi na ti on a n d po te n t ia l. But Pinion also l e a r n e d of m e n ' s faults. Their history was p e r m e a t e d wi th conflicts called “ w a r s . " Pinion was i n d e e d s h o c k e d by this k n o w l e d g e . M an h a d actually p l o t t e d , o v e r a n d o v e r again, t o m e t h o d i c a l l y d e s t r o y large p o p u l a t i o n s of himself. T h e c a u s e s of t h e s e pett y conflicts w e r e usually i nt a ngible c o n c e p t s s u c h as w e a l t h , g r e e d , p o w e r , p r i d e , etc. T he list was l ong a n d , t o Pi nion, q u i t e a b s u r d . T h e r e w e r e o t h e r p r o b l e m s . Pinion r ecall ed Mir¡a's e x p l a n a t ion of m a n b e i n g d iv i de d into t w o t y p e s , a n d n o w h e real ized t h a t it h a d n o t b e e n so s impl e. T h e r e c o r d s t ol d of h o w ma n ha d di vi de d hi msel f into artificial c a te g o r i e s called " n a t i o n s , " 230
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w h i c h w e r e a c o n s t a n t s o u r c e of friction. In a d d i t i o n , m a n was di f f e r e nt i a t e d by m a n y (to Pinion) i n c o n s e q u e n t i a l physical ch a racter ist ics . T h e s e m a d e u p t h e v a r i o u s " r a c e s " o f m a n , w h i c h als o s e r v e d t o e n g e n d e r hostility. T he r o b o t h a d n o t e d pr ev i ou s l y t ha t s o m e of t h e m e n in t h e C r y o g e n i c Re mi s si on C e n t e r w e r e of d i f fe r en t c o m p l e x i o n s , b u t h e ha d t h o u g h t it to b e of n o i m p o r t a n c e . H o w w r o n g h e h a d b e e n ! M e m b e r s of t h e v a r io u s races s e e m e d t o j u m p at a ny o p p o r t u n i t y t o p e r s e c u t e o n e another. But d u r i n g t h e s e ti me s , m a n also built C h i c a g o i nto a self p r es e r v i n g , sel f- ma in ta in i ng City. Yet with o t h e r p u r s u i t s — s u c h as gi ant i n d u s t r i e s — ma n h a d filled t h e e a r t h wit h t h e w a s t e s of his t e c h n o l o g i c a l c o n s u m p t i o n , p o i s o n i n g b o t h t h e land a n d t h e a t m o s p h e r e . T h u s C h i c a g o w as f o r c e d t o e r e c t a series of e n e r g y s hi e lds t h a t s u r r o u n d e d t h e City like a gi ant d o m e , k e e p i n g C h i c a g o f r e e f r o m t h e p ol lu ti on o n t h e O u t s i d e . As o t h e r p r o b l e m s a r o s e , C h i c a g o d e al t with t h e m , in t h e p r o c e s s s eal ing m a n off f r om t h e host il e e n v i r o n m e n t t h a t his foolish a c t io n s ha d c r e at e d . T h e d e s t r u c t i o n , h o w e v e r , d i d n o t e n d t h e r e , Pinion l e a r n e d . Even t h o u g h C h i c a g o, in its g r e a t n e s s , h a d b e e n a b l e t o c o n t e n d with t h e e n v i r o n m e n t a l p r o b l e m s a n d t h e t e c h n o l o g i c a l pitfalls, t h e r e w as a n o t h e r a r e a o v e r w h i c h t h e City h a d little c on t r o l . In ways t h a t t h e r e c o r d s di d n o t m a k e c le ar ( b e c a u s e t h e r e w e r e f e w e r t a p e s o n this par t of m a n ' s history), m a n ' s s oci ety b e g a n a gr adua l d e t e r i o r a t i o n . As C h ic a go b e c a m e less d e p e n d e n t u p o n m a n , m a n f o u n d t h a t t h e r e w as little w o r k for him t o d o . In a s e a r c h for m e a n i n g , m a n b e c a m e i n d u l g e n t in m e a n ingless activity a n d less i n t e r e s t e d in t h e imagi nat ive w a n d e r i n g s t h a t h a d b r o u g h t him to t h e p in n a c l e t h a t was Ch i ca g o. S o o n , t h e o nl y p u r p o s e for m a n ' s e x i s t e n c e was t o b e e n t e r t a i n e d , t o s impl y b e h a p p y . This e n t e r t a i n m e n t t o o k s h a p e in m an y ways. Ma n f l o o d e d his b o d y with c h em ic a l a n d electrical s t i m ulants, a n d t h e s e pr ac ti ce s p r o v e d t o b e d a n g e r o u s , addi ct ive, a n d e ve nt ua l ly d e s t ru c ti ve . Q u i t e simply, t h e s oc ie ty c o l l a p s e d , e v e n wi th C h i c a g o as 231
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t h e ul t ima te s er vant . M a n was s w al lo w ed u p in his o w n sociological po ll ut i o n . C h i c a g o , h o w e v e r , c o n t i n u e d t o f u n c t io n, p e r f o r m i n g t h e d ut i e s it h a d b e e n p r o g r a m m e d t o do . The r e c o r d s at this p o i n t b e c a m e s c a t t e r e d a n d i n c o m p l e t e , a n d Pinion was f o r c e d t o e x t r a p o l a t e o n w h a t f ol l o we d . He s u p p o s e d t h a t m a n e ve nt ua l ly r e v e rt e d t o an earl ier e ra, in w h i c h t h e r e was w h o l e s a l e d i s r e ga r d for h u m a n life. At least t h a t is w h a t t h e f r a g m e n t e d r e c o r d s s e e m e d to i nd ic at e a b o u t t h a t p e r i o d . With m a n n o w a b s e n t f r om t h e City, Pinion w o n d e r e d if m a n h a d left C h i c a g o for t h e u n k n o w n r e g io n s of the Outside. Time p a s s e d as Pinion c o n t i n u e d t o p o n d e r t h e s tr a ng e p h e n o m e n a of m a n . T h e n o n e day, h e was c o n t a c t e d by C h i c ag o as h e wa s leaving t h e Library. UNIT PI NI ON. C H I CA G O HAS BEEN AWARE OF YOUR INVESTIGATIONS. AND CAN REMAIN SILENT N O LONGER. EXPLAIN YOUR ACTIONS. Pinion was n o t s u r p r i s e d by this d e c l ar a ti on . In fact, h e had b e e n e x p e c t i n g it f r om t h e first da y t h a t h e h a d m a d e u n a u t h o r i z e d e n t r a n c e t o t h e Library. "I w i s h e d t o learn m o r e a b o u t m a n , C h i c a g o . " WHY N O T ASK C H I C A G O ? AS BEFORE. Pinion t h o u g h t b e f o r e a n s w e r i n g . He w a n t e d t o b e h o n e s t , yet d i sc re et. "I d i d n ' t w a n t t o b o t h e r y o u if y ou w e r e e n g a g e d in m o r e i m p o r t a n t ma tt e r s . T h e last t i m e I s p o k e with y o u o n this s u b ject, y ou gave t h e i m p r e s s i o n of n o t c ar i ng t o c o n t i n u e t h e conversation." YOU WERE CORRECT. W h e n C h i c a g o di d n o t c o n t i n u e , Pinion felt t h e n e e d t o s p e a k . "I h av e l e a r n e d m u c h a b o u t m a n , " h e finally said. UNIT PINION. THAT IS N O T YOUR FUNCTION. C H I C AG O SENSED THE F UNCTI ONI NG OF THE TAPES AND IN FORMATION SYSTEMS AT THE LIBRARY. C H I C A G O AL LOWED IT ONLY T O DISCOVER H O W M UC H YOU W O U L D WISH TO KNOW. 232
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" T h e n Ch ic a go has always k n o w n w h a t h a p p e n e d t o m a n ? " THAT IS CORRECT. MAN HAS CHANGED. HE IS N O LONGER THE CREATURE THAT SPAWNED C HI C A G O . HIS DESCENDANTS EXIST OUTSIDE. NEVER T O RETURN TO C H I CA GO . THAT IS E N OU GH . UNIT PINION. YOU WILL RETURN TO THE MAINTENANCE HANGAR. YOU WILL NOT ENTER THE LIBRARY AGAIN. UNLESS S O ORDERED. ACKNOWLEDGE. "This is Unit Pinion. I a c k n o w l e d g e y o u r c o m m a n d , Chicago." As m o r e t i me p a s s e d , a n d Pinion, d i s t r e s s e d a n d a p p al le d by w h a t h e ha d l e a r n e d , w o n d e r e d w h a t s h o u l d b e d o n e . He n o w r eal ized t h a t he w a s d i f f e r e n t f r om t h e o t h e r Units. By s o m e e l ec t r o n i c q ui r k , d u r i n g his a s s e m b l y , his circuitry was di ff er ent . He k e p t t h i nk i n g b ac k t o t h e grim s c e n e in S ec to r 14-A, t o t h e hi st or ies of m a n , to t h e r e m n a n t s living in exile b e y o n d t h e limits of C hi c ag o . At first, h e c o n s i d e r e d reviving t h e m e n w h o w e r e f r o z en in t h e C r yo g e n i c Re mi ss ion C e n t e r , a n d t h e n pos si bl y f indi ng ways t o c u r e t h e m . But h e d i s m i s s e d t h e i dea as impractical for several r e as o n s. C h i c a go w o u l d s ur el y s e n s e t h e d i s t u r b a n c e t o t h e ta n ks , a n d t h e r e w o u l d n o t b e e n o u g h t i m e t o effect a c u r e for a ny of t h e d is e a s e s . He k n e w w h a t h e m u s t d o. Traveling t h r o u g h a ser ies of e l ev a to rs a n d r a m p s , h e arrived at o n e of t h e e n t r a n c e s t o t h e s hi elds. He u s e d his t ool s to d is ar m t h e s ys te m a n d q ui ckl y s li p p e d t h r o u g h t o t h e O u t s i d e . Al mo s t i m m e di a te l y , a la r ms b e g a n t o s o u n d a n d h e s e n s e d C h i c a g o o p e n i n g a di re ct c h a n n e l t o him. UNIT PI NI ON. N O PENETRATION OF THE SHIELDS IS ALLOWABLE. RETURN AT ONCE. RETURN T O THE CITY AT ONCE. Pinion o f c o u r s e i g n o r e d t h e c o m m a n d . T h e r e was n o t u r n i n g b ac k n o w . He ha d n e v e r k n o w n of a ny Uni t's d i s r e g a r d i n g o n e of C h i c a g o ' s o r d e r s b u t h e did n o t w a n t to th i n k a b o u t t h e c o n se quences. 233
CHICAGO
S o o n h e w a s o u t of sight of t h e City, a n d C h i c a g o ha d c e a s e d its c o m m a n d s t o r e t u r n . The r o b o t w a n d e r e d t h r o u g h t h e h ot, t hi ck a t m o s p h e r e of t h e O u t s i d e for m a n y d a y - p e r i o d s , h o p i n g t o find t h e m e n w h o m u s t b e l urki ng s o m e w h e r e in t h e b a r r en land. But w i t h o u t t h e c o n v e n i e n c e s of t h e m a i n t e n a n c e h a n ga r , his c o m p o n e n t s w e r e b e g i n n i n g to s h o w w e ar . He w a s in n e e d of a circuitry c h e c k , lu br i ca t io n, a n d , of c o u r s e , h e f e a r e d a ny u n f o r e s e e n difficulties, s u c h as an u n e x p e c t e d fall. The terrain w a s r o u g h a n d h ar d for Pinion. He ha d b e e n d e s i g n e d t o f u n c t ion o n t h e s m o o t h s u r f ac e s o f C hi c a g o ' s r a m p s a n d co rr i do r s. T h e n , as h e e n t e r e d a lo ng , n a r r o w c a n y o n , h e d e t e c t e d m o v e m e n t in t h e rocky cr ags t h a t s u r r o u n d e d hi m. S wi tc hi ng his o c u l a r ma gn if ic at io n, h e s a w m a n y m e n s c u r r yi n g a lo ng t h e l e dg e s. “ I a m Unit P i n i o n ! ” h e called o u t t o t h e m , w av i ng his ar ms. "I have c o m e f ro m t h e City! From Ch ic a go ! I h a v e c o m e to h e lp y o u ! " But t h e m e n d i d n ' t r e s p o n d . His w o r d s o nl y s e e m e d to i n c e n s e t h e m into m o r e f u ri o us activity. As h e w a t c h e d t h e m , h e n o t i c e d t h a t t h e y w e r e all q u i t e di f f e re nt f ro m t h e girl he k n e w as Mir¡a. W h e r e h e r skin h a d b e e n s m o o t h a n d soft, t h e s e c r e a t u r e s w e r e c o a r s e a n d hairy. Thei r f aces w e r e d e f o r m e d a n d u n e v e n . Their l a n g u a g e w a s an uni ntel li gibl e a s s o r t m e n t of g r u n t s a n d cries. " You m u s t h e a r m e ! " Pinion s c r e a m e d as t h e m e n d r e w c l o s er o n all si des. "1 h av e c o m e t o b r i ng y o u b a ck . Back to t h e City w h e r e y o u b e l o n g ! " But t h e m e n did n o t h e a r Pinion. They c o u l d n o t u n d e r s t a n d his w o r d s . In st ea d, t h e y s w a r m e d o u t of t h e c a n y o n like d r o v e s of insect s, s u r r o u n d i n g him, b o m b a r d i n g him wi th b o u l d e r s t h r o w n f r om t h e rim a b o v e . T h e b o u l d e r s p o u n d e d his steel b o d y a n d c r u s h e d him t o his k n e e s , w h e r e t h e m e n b e g a n t o cl imb u p o n him in g r e a t n u m b e r s . Pinion was c o n f u s e d . W h y s h o u l d t h e y d o this? He c o u l d have d e s t r o y e d s c o r e s of t h e m with o n e s w e e p of his g r e at a r m ; b u t h e k n e w t h a t it w o u l d b e u nj us t . He k n e w t h a t h e m u s t try t o h el p t h e m . 234
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T h o s e w e r e his t h o u g h t s as t h e s a va ge m e n c r u s h e d him. Their rocks p e n e t r a t e d his skull, e x p l o d i n g circuits, s h o r t i n g o u t his m a n y intricate s y s te ms . His o n c e - g l e a m i n g shell was n o w a t a t t e r e d , p it t ed h ul k f ro m w h i c h t h e c r e a t u r e s p ul le d off s h a r d s of metal t h a t w o u l d s e r v e as f o r m i d a b l e w e a p o n s . Al ready, C h ic a go ha d p r e p a r e d a r e p l a c e m e n t Unit for Pinion in t h e a s s e m b l y c e n t e r . T h e City w o u l d c o n t i n u e t o b e m a i n t a i n ed .
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T HE M O S T P R I M I T I V E
The M o st Primitive RAY RUSSELL
Still t h e r e ? Yes, it is. Still h e r e . To my left, in t ha t little p a t c h o f light. Not m u c h . But e n o u g h t o k e e p m e g o i n g a w hi le l on g e r. M u s t n ' t m a k e a d a s h for it n o w , t h o u g h . T o o d a n g e r o u s . M u s t wait. M u s t fo rc e myself t o wait. H e r e in t h e s h a d o w s . Until t h e p a t c h of light g o e s away. Un¡tl t h e d a r k c o m e s . It's h a r d, t h e waiting. H o w l o n g have I b e e n c r o u c h e d h e r e m o t i o nl e s s ? D o n ' t k n o w . H o w l ong has it b e e n s i n c e I've e a t e n? Can't rem em ber. Not like t h e o ld days. That was a g o o d ti me . In sp it e of T h e m . W e d i d n ' t k n o w w h a t h u n g e r w as. W a r m . Sn u g. Belly full. Eating a n d s l e e p i n g a n d s cr e wi ng . A g o o d t i me. N o w m o s t of us a r e d e a d . O u r c o r p s e s litter t h e city, f ouli ng t h e air with t he ir stink. T h o s e of us w h o ar e left fight for e ve ry little scrap. That f o o d o v e r t h e r e . I wi sh I c o u l d s t o p s me ll in g it. M a k es m e w a n t t o t a k e a c h a n c e a n d gr a b it n o w . No. T oo m u c h risk. Last t i me , I ba re ly e s c a p e d with my life. D o n ' t t h i n k a b o u t t h e f o o d . Th in k a b o u t s o m e t h i n g else. Think a b o u t t h e old days. W h a t fools w e w e r e . Afraid of T h e m . N o w w e ' r e afraid of o n e a n o t h e r . Bef or e long, w e may b e e a t i ng o n e a n o t h e r . I've h e a r d t ha t s o m e of us ar e a l re a d y — W h a t ' s that? O v e r t h e r e . T h o u g h t I s aw s o m e t h i n g m o v e . In t h a t bit of s h a d o w in t h e c o r n e r . S o m e o n e ? Wait ing? Wait ing t o s na t c h t h e f oo d ? M y fo od ? 236
RAY RUSSELL
N ot s u r e. M u s t b e careful. The old days. H o w w e ran f r om T h e m ! Well, n o w w e are a l o n e . W e have it all t o o u r s e l ve s . Little by little, They left. M o v e d o u t . M o v e d away. Left t h e city e m p t y . Left it all t o us. It was ver y g o o d for a whil e. A l on g whi le . It w as t o o g o o d t o beli eve. T o o g o o d t o last. W e w e n t w h e r e w e w a n t e d , n o T h e m t o s t o p us, a n d w e a t e a n d a t e a n d ate. G o t fat. W e t h o u g h t t h e g o o d t i m e w o u l d last f or ev er . A n y o n e o v e r t h e r e ? No m o v e m e n t . M u s t h av e b e e n s e e i n g t hi ngs . T h e b a d t i m e d i d n ' t h a p p e n all at o n c e . It c a m e slowly. At first, w e hardly n o t i c e d t h a t t h e f o o d w as r u n n i n g o u t . S e e m e d i mp o s s i b l e . Before, t h e r e ha d always b e e n e n o u g h , m o r e t h a n enough. But w h e n They m o v e d o u t of t h e city, t h e f o o d w e n t with Them. For a l on g t i m e , t h e r e wa s p l e n t y left, b u t t h e n it s ta rt ed t o d w i n d l e . Life g o t har d. N o w t h e r e a re o nl y a f e w scraps. Like t h a t s c r a p o v e r t h e r e . It's d ar k n ow . Time to m a k e my move . . . G o o d . G o o d . N o t t h e b e st , b u t b e t t e r t h a n n o t h i n g . In t h e old days, w e h a d s ug ar , b r e a d , oil; n o w w e ' r e glad to g e t a s c r ap of p a p e r . M u s t e at fast, in c as e . . . H ere h e c o m e s !
o m n i v o r o u s , n o c t u r n a l in h ab it, w i t h f l a t t e n e d b o d i e s , l o n g t h r e a d l ik e a n t e n n a e , large e y e s , a n d le a t h e r y b r o w n i s h i n t e g u m e n t . Far o l d e r than m a n , t h e y are t h e m o s t prim itive o f liv ing w i n g e d i n s e c t s , a n d are a m o n g t h e o l d e s t fo ss il i n s e c t s . T h e w o r d is a c o r r u p t i o n o f Sp. c u c a r a c h a . S e e also ORTHOPTERA.
237
HINDSIGHT: 480 SE C O N D S
Hindsight: 4 8 0 S econds HARLAN ELLISON
H a d d o n Br ooks, a p o e t , s t o o d in t h e last city o f t h e Earth, wai t ing for t h e w o r d “ i m p a c t ' ' t o c o m e fr om s p a c e . H e was b e i n g r e c o r d e d . W h a t h e saw, h o w h e felt, all t h e s o u n d s a n d smel ls a n d s ma l le s t t o u c h e s of t h e d e a t h of his w o r l d w e n t u p a n d o u t t o t h e sh i ps as t h e y b e g a n t h e final j o u r n e y to n e w h o m e s s o m e w h e r e in t h e stars. His vital signs w e r e b e i n g m o n i t o r e d ; t h a l a m i c t a p s c a rr i e d his t h o u g h t s a n d t r a n s m i t t e d all t h e c ol or s of w h a t lay a r o u n d him, t o b e s t o r e d in m e m o r y c a s s e t t e s a b o a r d t h e ships. S o m e o n e to re p o rt th e d e a th o f th e Earth h a d b e e n t h e s h o r t of it, a n d f r om t h a t call for a v o l u n t e e r h e h ad b e e n w i n n o w e d f r o m t h e t e n t h o u s a n d a p p li cant s. Ten t h o u s a n d m a s o c h i s t s , v o y eu r s, h a r b i n g e r s of d e s t r u c t i o n , p o s s e s s o r s of t h e d e a t h wi sh , p s yc ho ti cs , chill analytical t h i n k e r s , fanatics, t r u e be lie ve rs, a n d t h o s e w h o th o u g h t they were cameras. He ha d b e e n c h o s e n b e c a u s e h e w as a p o e t , a n d o n this o c c a sion p e r h a p s onl y t h e e y e s of a c er tai n d r e a m e r c o u l d b e d e p e n d e d u p o n t o relay t h e e v e n t with e n o u g h ma gic for t h e g e n e r a t i o n s of c h i l d r e n w h o w o u l d b e b o r n in s p a c e o r o n d is t a nt w o r l d s circling u n k n o w n s u n s . He h a d v o l u n t e e r e d n o t b e c a u s e h e w as a m a n b e r ef t of s e n s e o r survivors, b u t b e c a u s e h e wa s a m a n with to o m u c h t o live for. He h a d a wife w h o m h e l ove d, h e h a d c h i l d r e n w h o a d o r e d hi m, he h a d p e a c e a n d g e n i u s a n d w as c o n t e n t with his gifts. Su ch a m a n c o u l d feel t h e a n g u i s h of losing t h e racial h o m e . So h e h a d v o l u n t e e r e d , k n o w i n g h e w a s c o r r e c t f or t h e t ask, a n d 238
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t h e y ha d c h o s e n him f r o m t h e t e n t h o u s a n d b e c a u s e it was c lear t hat h e c o u l d s u m u p final m o m e n t s with o r d e r a n d b ea ut y. T he city w a s still alive. It h a d b e e n k e p t so for him. All t h e o t h e r s h a d b e e n m e l t e d d o w n for t h e i r fi ss io na bl e materials. T h e cities h a d b e c o m e t h e g r e at O r i o n shi ps, t h r e e million t o n s e a c h, s h a p e d like t h e G r e a t Pyramid of Giza, with slightly conical p u s h e r plat es u n d e r t h e m . Th e cities, t a k e n t o t h e stars by h y d r o g e n - b o m b e x p l o s i o n s u n d e r t h e p u s h e r pl at es , o n e p e r s e c o n d for s e v e n m i n u t e s t o a c h i e v e Earth o r b i t . . . a n d t h e n t h e O r ¡ o n s s e n t t o all p oi nt s of t h e a s t r o l a b e , t o s e e d M a n t h r o u g h t h e d ar k . T h e cities w e r e g o n e , a n d t h e i r g o i n g h ad c o n t a m i n a t e d t h e Earth's a t m o s p h e r e b e y o n d pur ification. But it d id n o t m a t t e r : t h e Earth w o u l d di e wi thin t h e h o ur . He s t o o d in t h e c e n t e r of t h e arts r o t u n d a , t h e last wo r ks of Ko ns tanti n Xenakis f o r m i n g a n d r e - f o r m i n g a cr os s t h e d o m e , silver a n d g ol d t h r e a d s p a t t e r n i n g a h u n d r e d t i m e s a m i n u t e , a n d t h e small— b u t very clear, very d is tinct— voi ce of t h e O r i o n fleet flagshi p s p o k e in his h e ad . "I t' s o n t h e way. An h o u r , p e r h a p s . " Br ooks f o u n d hims e lf l o o k i n g u p w h e n a n s w e r i n g . " H a v e y o u b e e n g e t t i n g w h a t I'm s e n d i n g ? " "Copying." "Yes, I'm sorry. That's w h a t I m e a n t . C o p y i n g . " T h e vo ic e f ro m s p a c e g r e w mi lder . " N o , I'm sor ry . . . so u s e d to t e c ht al k. You just p u t it a ny way y ou w a n t , Mr. Brooks. W e ' r e g e t t i n g it all. Very clearly. It's fine, just fine. I d i d n ' t m e a n t o i n t e r r u p t y o u , just w a n t e d y o u to k n o w t h e r e wa s no change." "Thank you." T h e vo ic e, a n d a ny w h i s p e r of its p r e s e n c e , v a n i s h e d fr om his h e a d , a n d he k n e w h e was a l o n e o n c e m o r e . A l o n e — with t h e e n t i r e p o p u l a t i o n of t h e Earth listening, w a t c hi ng . He st rol led o u t of t h e r o t u n d a a n d s t o o d o n t h e s p e a k e r s ' s hel f o v e r l o o k i n g t h e pastel g a r d e n s . 239
HINDSIGHT: 480 S E C O N D S
" T h e sky is ver y b l u e , " h e said. "I' ve n e v e r s e e n it so blue. W a t e r , all t h e w a y t o h e a v e n . But t h e r e a re n o b i r d s . " His e y e s r e c o r d e d e ve r yt h i ng : t h e swayi ng pastel t r e e s t ha t p i c ke d u p t h e b r e e z e a n d p a s s e d it o n, t he ir c ol or s m e r gi n g o n e into a n o t h e r with a de li ca te so ftn es s. " H e r e is a p o e m for y o u , w h o e v e r . " He c o m p o s e d swiftly, t h e lines falling into pl ac e in his m i n d an i ns t an t b e f o r e h e s p o k e t h e m . “ Vastator, d e s t r o y e r f r o m t h e c o l d , Eating t i m e a t fifty t h o u s a n d k i l o m e t e r s p e r s e c o n d , I w o n 't e ve n s e e y o u r approach. O u t e r d a rk s e n t y o u , m y S u n h i d e s y o u , A n d w h e n y o u r h u n g e r tak es y o u p a st, Y o u w ill d r o p o n l y e i g h t m i n u t e s o f l e f t o v e r s From y o u r t e r r i b le t a b l e . ”
He s h o o k his h e a d . It was an i n a d e q u a t e p i e c e of w or k . He tr ied to m a k e a m e n d s : " T h e b ui l d i ng s ar e like metal grain in t h e sunl i g ht . Pi npoi nt s o f light flickering like n o v a e in c r o s st a r filters. T he y a r e very lovely. But t h e r e ar e n o s o u n d s of p e o p l e . T he city s e e m s t o b e wa it ing for y o u r r e t u r n . Po or d u m b thi ng, a d o g t h a t d o e s n ' t k n o w its m a s t e r has d i e d. It will wait until it dies, t o o . Did y ou e v e r u n d e r s t a n d t h a t cities live onl y with p e o p l e in t h e m ? " He p r e s s e d t h e s t u d o n his f loa te r p ac k a n d r os e slowly fr om t h e shelf. T h e c entr al g a r d e n s of t h e city did n o t e n d a br up t ly , b u t di ff us ed t h e m s e l v e s i nto t h e mai n arterial p a s s a g e s l ea d i ng a way f r om t h e c e n t e r . No s t r e e t w as e m p t y of life, e v e n n ow. He f loa te d o v e r t h e c o m m e r c i a l c e n t e r . " T h e r o b o t s c o n t i n u e t h e i r w o r k , " h e said. "Little p e r s o n s of metal a n d plastic. I've always h a d a g o o d f ee li ng a b o u t t h e m . Do y ou k n o w why? T h e y ask s o little a n d t h e y d o s o m u c h . T h e y ' r e s o kind n o o n e w o u l d t h i n k of b e i n g cr uel t o t h e m , s o t h e y lead t h e b e s t of lives. T h ey a r e c o n t e n t in t h e i r w or k . Even with all of us g o n e , t h e y k e e p t h e w h e e l s of c o m m e r c e t u r n i n g . H o w f o r t u n a t e w e w e r e t o have h a d t h e m w o r k i n g with u s . " 240
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He f l oa t e d l owe r , p a s s i n g t h e n e w s kiosk at t h e c o r n e r of Press St r ee t a n d H o l o g r a m A v e n u e . It w a s r e c a p p i n g t h e final s t a t e m e n t s of t h e a s t r o n o m e r s . Br ooks h o v e r e d a n d l is t e n ed t o t h e kiosk's p l e a s a n t v oi c e; it w a s t h e liquid vo ic e of T andr a M e l l o w e , t h e h o l o personal it y. “ T he pl a ne t -s i z e d b o d y m o v i n g in o n o u r Su n f ro m i n t e r stellar s p a c e is r o u g hl y t h r e e h u n d r e d a n d t went y-five t im e s t h e mass of t h e Earth, m a k i n g it s o m e w h a t g r e a t e r t h a n t h a t of Jupit er, t h e largest p l a n e t in t h e solar sy s te m. In d i a m e t e r it is a p p r o x i m a t e l y n i n e t y - o n e t h o u s a n d miles a n d , b e c a u s e of its collision c o u r s e with t h e S un , has b e e n n a m e d Vast at or, fr om t h e Latin m e a n i n g “ d e s t r o y e r . " Preliminary c al cu la ti o ns in d i c a t e d t h e a s t e r o i d w o u l d hit t h e Sun directly, b o r i n g in at a t h i r t y - d e g r e e an gl e . H o w e v e r , as t h e b o d y n e ar s , revised c o m p u t a t i o n s a dvi s e Vas tat or will o nl y g r a ze t h e Sun, t e a r off a g r e at p i e c e of t h e c o r o n a . U n f o r tu na t el y , this will n o t affect w h a t will h a p p e n to t h e Earth. T h e s p r a y of radiat ion — chiefly h i g h - e n e r g y p r o t o n s a n d h e l i u m n uc l ei — will strike t h e Earth as t h e Sun s pr ays t h e h e a v e n s . All life will b e first sterilized a n d s ho r t l y t h e r e a f t e r v a p o r i z e d by t h e sol ar s t or m . T h e soil will me l t a n d f u s e into a glaze, a n d t h e o c e a n s will b e gi n t o boil. It will b e a p p r o x i m a t e l y e i g h t m i n u t e s b e f o r e t h e sight of w h a t has h a p p e n e d t o o u r Su n r e a c h e s t h e Earth, b u t n o o n e will b e h e r e to s e e it. No o n e e x c e p t H a d d o n Brooks, the well-known p o et . . ." Br ooks r o s e a n d w e n t a wa y f r o m t h e r e . He sailed o v e r The H u n d r e d Lakes, j o i n e d by t h e i r floater locks. Small b o a t s a n d c a t a m a r a n s d ri ft ed a c r os s th ei r sur f aces idly. " S u n d a y s t r ol l in g, " h e said, a n d w e n t o v e r u n s e e n . "I a m a b o v e t h e g h e t t o s n o w . They r e m i n d m e of ve r se s fr om M o t h e r G o o s e . It m u s t b e fine t o b e a m e m b e r of a mi nori ty, t o k n o w w h e r e y o u c a m e f r o m, a n d w h a t c er ta in w o r d s t h a t c a n n o t b e t ra n s l a t e d c o m p l e t e l y m e a n . No o n e c o u l d have b e e n h a p p y h e r e . D e a t h b e d s of illusion. Invisible walls. Th e se w e r e t h e h ol lo ws w h e r e m e n a n d w o m e n g av e t h e m s e l v e s to y e s t e r d a y s s o t h e i r c h i ld r en m i gh t h av e t o m o r r o w s . But I c a n n o t b e s a d a b o u t t h e m . T he y k n e w a kind of love h i d d e n from 241
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t h e rest of us. W h e r e y o u go n o w , t o w h a t e v e r n e w places, m a k e s u r e y o u leave r o o m for t h o s e w h o n e e d t h a t s p e c ia l n e s s . W e c a n n o t all b e t h e s a m e ; it isn't e v e n right t h a t w e s h o u l d be." H e s o a r e d t o t h e h i g h e s t levels of t h e r e s i d e n c e s hel ves , p a s si n g t h r o u g h byways a n d u n d e r p a s s i n g flying b ri dg e s, s k i m m i n g o v e r sl¡deways a n d c as ti ng his l o n g s h a d o w o v e r t h e p e b b l e d s ur f ac e s of walls a n d o t h e r walls. Sl o p in g o u t e r s ur f ac e s a n d s u d d e n a p e r t u r e s . Co n c av it ie s a n d t u n n e l s fit for t h e n e e d s of t h o s e w h o liked co o l , d a r k pl aces w h e r e t h e s c e n t of m o u n t a i n g e n t i a n still l in ge re d. He s t o p p e d in a tiny f or es t of d wa rf b o n s a i a n d tr ied to c o m p o s e a n o t h e r p o e m , this o n e for his wife. "This may n o t b e right, Calla, b u t it's t h e b e s t I can d o right n o w . . . I find my t h o u g h t s split. I w a n t t o say s o m e t h i n g special t o yo u a n d t h e c h i l d r e n , b u t t i m e is g r o w i n g s h o r t a n d it s er ve s m e right if I've left a n y love or r e s p e c t for y o u u n s a i d a fter all this t i me . You w e r e t h e b e s t m o m e n t s for m e , t h e b r i g ht e s t c o l or s , t h e d e e p e s t sighs, t h e s w e e t e s t s u ga r of life. You w e r e always w h a t I was afraid I'd n e v e r b e w o r t h y of. But I'm c o n t e n t n o w ; I h el d y o u r love. O h , hell, my love, my b es t, I c a n ' t c o m p o s e a p o e m n o w . Forgive m e , b u t all t h a t c o m e to m i n d a r e a n o t h e r m a n ' s w o r d s . He was called Randall Jarrell a n d h e lived a h u n d r e d y ea r s a g o a n d n e v e r s a w t h e stars f ro m Ma rs o r l o o k e d into t h e b u r n i n g h e a r t of o u r p o o r Sun f rom t h e q uicks ilver d o m e s of t h e M o o n , b u t h e k n e w my love for y ou a n d h e said: " 'But b e , as y o u h a v e b e e n , m y h a p p i n e s s ; L et m e s l e e p b e s i d e y o u , e a c h n i g h t, l ik e a s p o o n ; W h e n , st a r t i n g fr o m m y d r e a m s , I g r o a n t o y o u , M ay you r I love y ou s e n d m e b a c k to sle e p . A t m o r n i n g b r i n g m e , g r a y e r f o r its m irro rin g, T h e h e a v e n s ' s u n p e r f e c t e d in y o u r e y e s . ' "
T h e n h e h e a r d t h e voi ce t h a t called t h e e n d . 242
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"M r . Br ooks, i m p a c t . " His b r e a t h f r o ze in his nostrils. T he voice again, c a u g h t in a s o b , " O h , my G o d , it's beaut i f ul , s o t er ri bl e . . An d h e k n e w h e h a d e i g ht m in u t e s . A s t r a n g e prickling a s s a u l t e d his flesh a n d h e c ri ed o u t to Calla, far away a b o a r d an O r i o n , " I ' m d o n e . . . t h e r e c a n b e n o o t h e r c h i l dr e n . . An d h e s t o p p e d hi mself; h e k n e w t h e r e was less t h a n f o u r h u n d r e d a n d e ight y s e c o n d s a n d h e ha d t o tell it all, tell it s o well t h e c h i l d r e n of Earth w o u l d always b e a b l e t o d r a w o n his c a ss e t t e s wi t h his visions a n d w o r d s a nd d ream s on th e m . He s e t tl e d wi thin hi mself, l e a p e d f r om t h e shel f a n d w e n t d o w n t o s t a n d in t h e silver s t r e e t w h e r e h e w o u l d s p e n d his last m o m e n t s . H a d d o n Br ooks s p o k e t h e n , of t h e living s p a c e t h a t h a d finally c o m e t o h ol d t h e d e a r e s t h o p e s of h u m a n k i n d . He s p o k e of t h e c a ve r n s b e n e a t h t h e p ul si n g city w h e r e e n e r g y was c h a n n e l e d i nto light a n d h e a t a n d rain t h a t w o u l d fall w h e n t h e w o m e n called for rain. He s p o k e o f t h e r a c e t r a c k s w h e r e a d v e n t u r e c o u l d still b e f o u n d in trying t o b e a t s o u n d wa v es as t h e y r a c e d to t ar ge ts. He s p o k e of t h e o c e a n s t ha t h a d b e e n c a l m e d so m e n c o u l d sail a c r o s s w i t h o u t fear. He s p o k e of t h e b e s t of p e o p l e a n d t h e ways in w h i c h h u m a n s h ad c o m e t o k n o w t h e m s e l v e s well e n o u g h t o laugh at t h e t h o u g h t t ha t wa rs w e r e inevitable. This h a d b e e n t h e city in w h i c h h e h a d b e e n b o r n , in wh ic h h e h a d f o u n d t h e w o r d s t o m a k e his s o n g s , w h e r e h e had m e t a n d j o i n e d wi th Calla, w h e r e t h e c h i l d r e n h a d g r o w n fr om t h e i r b o d i e s ; t h e city w h e r e h e w o u l d b e c o m e v a p o r at t h e final m o m e n t . S o m e of it w as e v e n p o e t ry , b u t n o t m u c h . " I ' m afraid, u p t h e r e . I'm afraid of my vanity t o b e t h e last o n e h e r e . It w as f oolish. O h , h o w I w a n t t o g o wit h y ou n o w. Please forgive m e my fear, b u t I w a n t s o m u c h t o live!" If t h e r e h a d o n l y b e e n t i me . He wa s c h a g r i n e d for just a m o m e n t t ha t h e h a d let t h e m d o w n , ha d failed t o d o w h a t 243
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h e h a d b e e n left b e h i n d t o d o . But t h a t lasted o nl y a m o m e n t a n d h e k n e w h e ha d said as m u c h as a n y o n e c o u l d say, a n d it w o u l d b e right f or t h e c h i l dr e n of t h e d a r k p laces , e ve n if it t o o k t h e m a t h o u s a n d y ea rs t o find a n o t h e r h o m e . T h e n h e t u r n e d , as t h e s e c o n d s w i t h e r e d , k n o w i n g t h e solar s t o r m h a d d r e n c h e d him a n d at a n y m o m e n t h e w o u l d v a p o r ize. He l o o k e d u p into t h e w a t e r - b l u e sky, pas t t h e b l in di ng Sun t h a t s u d d e n l y flared a n d c o n s u m e d t h e h e a v e n s , a n d h e s h o u t e d , "I'll always b e with y o u — " b u t t h e last w o r d was n e v e r u t t e r e d ; h e was g o n e . S o o n after, t h e s eas b e g a n t o g e nt l y boil.
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5,000,000 A. D. MIRIAM ALLEN deFORD
Dark. T he d ar k of a dy in g night o n a dy in g p l a ne t. Sp ar s e faint stars g l e a m e d half c o n c e a l e d b e h i n d t h e c ur ta in of aerial d u s t . And c o l d — b o n e - s h i v e r ¡ ng l y cold. Th e y w e r e u s e d t o b o t h . They ha d n e v e r k n o w n a n y t h i n g else. O h , yes, t h e s u n w o u l d rise— t h e sick r ed s u n —-and a dull w a r m t h w o u l d s p r e a d o v e r t h e p i t te d e a r th a n d t h e s t u n t e d plants for a f e w s h o r t h o u r s . T h e n t h e d a r k n e s s a n d t h e cold w o u l d c o m e again. A nd this was m i d s p r i n g — May, m e n o n c e ha d called it, b u t t h a t w a s w h e n t i m e a n d pl ace w e r e i m p o r t a n t . N o w all m a n ' s o c c u p a t i o n w as t o k e e p h i ms e lf alive, t o find e n o u g h f o od t o s t o k e his i n n e r e n g i n e ; p e r h a p s , if h e w as really lucky, t o m a t e , a n d p e r h a p s — p e r h a p s — t o r e p r o d u c e himself. Life n e v e r lasted long. Forty year s wa s o ld a g e , as it had b e e n in t h e Paleolithic t i m e , five t h o u s a n d c e n t u r i e s b e f o r e . Far t o t h e n o r t h , a n d m o r e rarely to t h e s o u t h , r os e t h e Ruins, w h e r e t h e g r e at cities h a d o n c e b e e n . But this land w h e r e t h e g r o u p d w e l t ha d b e e n t h e t r op ic s , t h e r e gi on of t h e e q u a t o r , w h e r e o n c e j un g le s a n d rain f or es t s h a d f l o u r i sh e d, a n d w h e r e w h a t h e a t t h e f e e b l e s u n e n g e n d e r e d w a s still at its m e a g e r p e ak . T he m e n w h o lived t h e r e n o w h a d n e v e r h e a r d of t h e Ruins, a n d t h e j un g le s a n d rain f or est s w e r e t h e material s of myth. They s p o k e a d e b a s e d c o n g l o m e r a t i o n of t h e i r ancest ral t o n g u e s . O f t h e m ig ht y se ri e s of civilizations t h at h a d p r e c e d e d 245
5,000,000 A .D .
t h e m t h e y h a d n o k n o w l e d g e w h a t e v e r . They, w h o s e f o r g o t t e n f o r e b e a r s h a d s w e p t t h e stars, g r u b b e d for t h e i r s u b s t e n a n c e in t h e e x h a u s t e d e ar t h . They ha d r e v e r s e d history, u n d e r t h e h a rs h c o n d i t i o n s of t h e i r lives; politics, e c o n o m i c s , p h i l o s o p h y , s c i e n c e , religion w e r e l ong f o r g o t t e n . Yet t h e y w e r e still h u m a n . From h e r d a r k skin, straight bl ack hair, a n d tipt¡lted black e ye s, N¡a m i g h t h a v e b e e n g u e s s e d to h av e a s t r o n g b l e n d of Asiatic g e n e s in h e r a nc es t r y. But t h e racial mi x t ur e wa s n o w s o ol d a n d so c o m p l i c a t e d t h a t it was i m p o s s i b l e t o tell w h e n c e a n y of t h e m s p r a n g originally. Held w as taller t h a n s h e — b u t n o t m u c h taller, h u m a n b ei ng s ha d s h r u n k — a n d fairer of skin, b u t h e t o o wa s a m ix t u r e of m a n y strains. All t h a t m a t t e r e d t o e i t h e r of t h e m w a s t h a t t h e y w e r e n o t t o o nearly r e l a t e d — t h e o n e t a b o o b e s i d e s c a n ni b al is m t h a t h a d p e r s i s t e d — a n d t h a t t h e y w e r e y o u n g a n d in love. In love f or t h e s e a s o n , t ha t is; m o r e lasting u n i o n s w e r e f e w — as f ew as t h e fertile o n e s . I n d e e d , t h e y w e r e t h e s a m e : t h e rare c o n c e p t i o n a n d birth of a viable child a c t e d t o k e e p t h e p a r e n t s t o g e t h e r , g u a r d i n g t h e i r t r e a s u r e . Th ey w o u l d have b e e n a m a z e d t o learn t ha t o n c e t h e p r o b l e m w as a p o p u l a t i o n t e e m i n g b e y o n d c on t r o l . M e n of p r e hi s t or i c t i m e s c l o t h e d t h e m s e l v e s in t h e skins of animals killed for m e a t a n d fur. T h e r e w e r e n o large a ni mal s left t o kill. So t h e art of w e a v i n g h a d p e r f o r c e s ur vi ve d; b u t c o t t o n a n d flax n o l o n g e r g r e w , t h e r e w e r e n o s h e e p t o give w oo l. By n ec es s i ty , s in ce e v e n in t h e s e f o r m e r tropical l ands t h e c li mat e r a n g e d fr om chilly t o f r ee zi ng , t h e y s h i v e r e d in g a r m e n t s w o v e n f ro m pl ant fibers l ab o r i ou sl y s e a r c h e d for a n d s t r i p p e d a n d s p u n , p a s s e d d o w n f ro m g e n e r a t i o n t o g e n e r a t i o n as t he ir o n l y riches w o r n until t h e y w e r e in s h r e d s . Stealing a n o t h e r ' s c l o t h i n g w as u n h e a r d of; c l o t h e s w e r e as s c ar ce as p e o p l e , a n d a l m o s t as inviolate. And for s h el t e r , w o o d b e i n g s o ha r d to find, a n d w h a t t h e r e was b e i n g s a v ed a n d c h e r i s h e d for fires t h a t m u s t n e v e r go e nt ir ely o u t , t h e g r o u p h u d d l e d a ga in s t t h e c ol d a n d t h e occa246
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s¡onal thin rain in d u g o u t s wi th e n t r a n c e s a n d s m o k e h ol es c u n n i n g l y p r o t e c t e d a ga ins t t h e win d. Animals c o u p l e b e f o r e a n y o n e ' s e ye s. H u m a n s s e e k privacy, n o m a t t e r h o w small o r i sol ated t h e c o m m u n i t y . Lovers m u s t s e e k s o m e s e c r et , s h e l t e r e d place for c o n s u m m a t i o n of th ei r rites. Nia a n d Held, c h i l d r e n of t h ei r t i me . " H a v e y ou e a t e n ? " h e a s k e d t e n d e r l y as t h e y w a l k e d ar m in a r m t o o n e of t h e s e c l u d e d caves se t a p a r t by c u s t o m for l o ve ma k¡ ng . It wa s a tradi ti onal f o r m of loving inquiry for p e o p l e w h o d id n o t have e n o u g h t o e at always o r o ft e n . "Yes, last night. D i d n ' t y o u ? M o r v b o u g h t b ac k t w o big pots of fat g r u b s . " " M o r v ' s a g o o d h u n t e r . " His t o n e w a s j ea lo us . " N o b e t t e r t h a n y o u ! " s h e f lashed. He s mi le d, gratified, b u t he still felt u n e as y . "Last year y ou a n d M o r v — " " T h a t w a s last year , H e l d; it's f o r g o t t e n . " " N i a , " h e b r o u g h t o u t at last, "I wish it c o u l d b e you a n d me, from now o n ." " I ' d b e glad, t o o . If w e c o u l d o nl y b e lucky e n o u g h — " " W o u l d y ou really? D o y ou t h i n k w e m ig h t ? " H e ld 's voice was wistful. " T h e last t i m e Gar s e x a m i n e d m e , h e said I was a fine s p e c i m e n . " "Eth a n d Vin h a d Erla, t w o ye ar s a g o , a n d n e i t h e r of t h e m is as r o b u s t as w e a r e . " " O h , Nia! W o u l d n ' t it b e w o n d e r f u l ? " Th ey h a s t e n e d t h e i r s te p s. . . . A n d a child was c o n c e i v e d , a n d wa s b o r n , a n d lived. M o r e o v e r , it w a s a b oy ; b e f o r e half t h e m a l e infants ha d d i ed s o o n af ter birth. In this b o y Ale's s e c o n d year , Gar s d i e d ; h e h a d b e e n , from i n t e r e s t a n d empir ical k n o w l e d g e , t h e n e a r e s t t h e y ha d t o a me di ca l c o n s u l t a n t . O t h e r s d i e d, a n d n o m o r e c h i l dr e n w e r e b o r n . Thei r n u m b e r w as d o w n n o w t o little o v e r fifty. And sl ow as t h e p r o c e s s of d is s o l u ti o n was , t h o s e w h o h a d e n e r g y 247
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e n o u g h t o c a r e for a n y t h i n g b e y o n d t h e day's n e e d s a n d h a r d ships o f t en l o o k e d a p p r e h e n s i v e l y at t h e sky, w h e r e e very day t h e pale s u n s e e m e d pal er ; as t h e cold wa s m o r e p e n e t r a t i n g , t h e yield of t h e e a r t h w as m o r e g r u d g i n g. Vaguely t h e y felt t ha t s o m e t h i n g was w r o n g — s o m e t h i n g " u p t h e r e . " In t h a t earl ier t i m e of d i s t u r b e d f ee li ng m e n w e n t awry. The m u t e d sexuality of t h e u n d e r n o u r i s h e d flared u p as if t h e r e m ai n s o f h u m a n i t y s o m e h o w s e n s e d t h a t t he ir dy in g su n w o u l d b u r s t s o o n into a last solar o r g a s m a n d d e s t r o y t he ir w o r l d b e f o r e it e x p i r e d into a d e n s e , col d w e i g h t , b u r d e n i n g s p a c e ; a n d m e n , t h e c h i l d r e n of s u n , o b e y e d t h a t s a m e u n c o n s cious u r g e t o w a r d e x p lo s io n . T he i m m e m o r i a l e as y p e r m i s s i v e n e s s f a d ed . Part of t h e rising t ens ity inevitably e x p r e s s e d itself in hostile a g gr e s s i o n . T h e r e h a d b e e n " p e a c e " for u n t o l d c e n t u r i e s — e ve r si nc e t h e d e c l i n e of t h e s u n b e c a m e an a c c e p t e d fact— b e c a u s e all h u m a n e n e r g y was n e e d e d m e r e l y to stay alive. N o w, with this s t r a n g e i nne r c o m p u l s i o n u p o n t h e m , i m p u l s e s a n d a ct i on s lost in t h e fog of t h e p a s t s u d d e n l y s h o o k t h e m . T h e r e w e r e q ua r r e l s , t h e r e was r e v e n g e , t h e r e w e r e a l m o s t f e u d s , in t his o n e small g r o u p . U n d o u b t e d l y t h e s a m e t r a n s f o r m a t i o n was o v e r w h e l m i n g all t h e o t h e r little p o c k e t s of m a n k i n d , e v e r y w h e r e o n t h e p la ne t, of w h i c h t h e y h a d n e v e r h e a rd . M o r v wa s t he ir g r e a t h u n t e r . But in o t h e r a re a s, life ha d failed him sadly. T h o u g h h e h a d , m o r e t h a n a ny of t h e m , g a i n e d e x p e r i e n c e in t h e c a p t u r e , a n d h e n c e in t h e d i s m e m b e r i n g , of t h e o c c a sional small wild ani ma ls , af t er Gar s d i e d n o o n e s u g g e s t e d , as he h a d h o p e d silently, t h a t h e, as t h e m o s t k n o w l e d g e a b l e of a n a t o m y , a t t e m p t t o t a k e t h e medi cal m a n ' s pl ace. No w o m a n , af ter g e n t l e N¡a, h a d h i n t e d o r r e s p o n d e d t o his hints t h a t t h e y try t o g e t h e r t o p r o d u c e a child, as Hel d a n d s h e ha d d o n e . They w e r e all s t u n t e d a n d b o n e - t h i n , b u t Mor v, early w r i n k l e d a n d gray, w a s p e r h a p s t h e l east p r e p o s s e s s i n g of all t h e y o u n g e r m e n . H i t he r to h e h a d lost s u c h h u r ts in t h e e xc i te m e n t of t h e c h a s e a n d t h e pr a is e of his p r o w e s s , b u t n o w 248
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in t h e s e n e w d i s t u r b i n g t i me s incr easi ngly it g r o u n d u p o n his spirit. M o r v w e n t h u n t i n g a l o n e a n d in t h e late a f t e r n o o n c a m e back a l o n e . For o n c e h e ha d b e e n u n s u c c e s s f u l — all h e ha d was half a potful of w i z e n e d b er ries . O n l y f o u r o r five of t h e ol d a n d w e a k w e r e t h e r e t o g r e e t hi m, a n d t h e y g a z e d d i s g u s t edl y at his p o o r offeri ng. He t h r e w t h e b e r ri e s o n t h e g r o u n d b e f o r e t h e m a n d s t r o d e a wa y to his o w n d u g o u t . T h e r e he did n o t e v e n buil d u p t h e fire w h o s e e m b e r s lay s m o l d e r i n g u n d e r t h e a s h e s , b u t s q u a t t e d b e s i d e it a n d s t a re d angrily at nothing. It w a s a day of wild w i n d a n d bi tter c o l d; t h e dim r e d sun cast sul l en s h a d o w s o n t h e sc an ty grass. S u d d e n l y M o r v r os e a b r u p t l y a n d with a m u t t e r e d i m p r e c a t i o n h u r r i e d a cr os s t h e e n c a m p m e n t o u t of sight of t h e few w a t c h e r s . An old ma n s h o o k his h e a d in p u z z l e m e n t ; an old w o m a n c r o s s e d h e r self— an a n c i e n t g e s t u r e ori gi na t in g n o n e of t h e m k n e w w h e r e . M o r v d i s a p p e a r e d in t h e line of thin t r e e s t h a t b o r d e r e d t h e s l ow trickle t h e y cal led a river. It was a l m o s t d u s k w h e n o n e by o n e t h e o t h e r h u n t e r s drifted in. T he y h a d b e e n little m o r e s uc c es s f u l; t h e r e w o u l d scarcel y b e e n o u g h t o g o a r o u n d t o ni g ht . N¡a a n d Hel d w a l k e d w e a ri e d l y t o w a r d t h e i r d u g o u t . They h ad left Ale for t h e da y with Vin a n d Eth's child Erla, t h r e e year s his s e n i o r , a n d h e n c e in t h e i r s h o r t life-span old e n o u g h to b e t r u s t e d t o k e e p an e y e o n t h e baby. N o w Erla, s e e i n g t h e m c o m i n g , ran o u t to m e e t t h e m . “ Ale w as b a d ! " s h e p i p e d . " H e w e n t h o m e a n d w o u l d n ' t c o m e back." “ D o n ' t wo rr y, Erla," Hel d said, p at ti ng t h e chil d' s h e a d . “ He'll b e t h e r e , wa it i n g for us a n d his m e a l . " The du g o u t was empty. “ D o n ' t h id e, little Ale," his m o t h e r called. “ W e ' r e t o o tired t o r un a n d l oo k for y o u . " T h e r e w as n o a n s w e r . Two h o u r s later t h e y f o u n d Ale's s t r a n gl e d b o d y half b u r i e d 249
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o n t h e r i ve r ba nk . M o r v ha d v a n i s h e d. W h a t t h e i r r e m o t e a n c e s t o r s ha d called c r i m e h a d l ong ago virtually d i s a p p e a r e d . Th ey h a d n o vi gor for bodi ly a s s a ul t a n d n o n e e d for r ap e . Theft w as as far o u t s i d e t h e i r u n d e r s t a n d i n g as w as d e l i b e r a t e m u r d e r ; t h e y ha d n o t h i n g w o r t h st eal ing e x c e p t c l ot h in g , a n d t o steal t h a t was u n t h i n k a b l e , s o n o t h i n g w as s to le n. A b o v e all, t h e y w e r e so f e w t h a t h u m a n life was i n e xo ra bl y s a c r e d . And this w as far w o r s e t h a n m e r e m u r d e r ; it was t h e e x t i n c ti on of a l m o s t all t h e i r f u t u r e , w h a t f u t u r e t h e y h a d w h il e t h e r ed s u n w a i t e d t o i m p l o d e . An a b s e n c e of religion d o e s n o t ne c ess ar il y m e a n an a b s e n c e of s u p e r s t i t i o n . Like all h u m a n b e i n gs , t h e s e last m e n o n a dy in g e a r t h w e r e partly rational a n d partly irrational. This c at as t r o p h e , c o m p l e t e l y b e y o n d living m e m o r y o r tr ad it io n o r e v e n i ma g in a ti o n , e v o k e d a f l oo d of n e u r o t i c h o r r o r . Th ey t h o u g h t n o t s o m u c h of f i nd in g a n d p u n i s h i n g M or v — s ur e ly an act s o u n p r e c e d e n t e d a n d s o t er r ib le w o u l d b e t h e w r e t c h e d c r e a t u r e ' s o w n i r r e p ar a b l e s e l f - p u n i s h m e n t — as of s o m e h o w ave rt i ng t h e evil o m e n of u n i m a g i n a b l e di sast er. In u n c o n s c i o u s psychic s e lf - d e f e n s e , t h e y h u r t t h e m s e l v e s to avoid w o r s e hu r t , p l u n g i n g into an o rg y of atavistic sacrifice. Pr ec io us f o o d w e n t u p in s m o k e ; Mo r v' s d u g o u t was t o r n a s u n d e r a n d t h e e a r t h of w h i c h it ha d b e e n m a d e w as piled o n little Ale's grave; t h e old w o m a n w h o ha d o n c e c r o s s e d herself, an avid m i s e r of half -mad f ant asi es, c u t a f in ge r a n d let t h e b l o o d s e e p into t h e g r o u n d . T h e r e w a s n o c o n s e q u e n c e . N o t h i n g h a p p e n e d , g o o d o r b ad . Food b e c a m e n o m o r e o r less plentiful, t h e c ol d a n d w i n d w e r e as always, t h e s u n c o n t i n u e d to lo we r, r ed a n d t h r e a t e n ing, like a dy in g m a n c o n s e r v i n g hi mself for o n e last d r e a df u l s p u r t of s tr e n g t h . S u d d e n l y Mo rv c a m e ba c k. No o n e k n e w w h e r e h e ha d b e e n . He was e m a n c i a t e d a n d filthy. He w e n t directly t o t h e d u g o u t w h e r e Held a n d Nia w e r e s l e e p i n g , w o k e t h e m , a n d fell s o b b i n g at t h e i r feet. 250
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"Kill m e ! " h e b e g g e d . They w e r e a ghast . " H o w c o u l d t h a t h el p u s? " Held a s k e d him. " Yo u have a lr e ad y w e a k e n e d us, first by d e s t r o y i n g t h e child a n d t h e n by leaving us. N o w at least y o u ca n r e s t o r e y o u r se l f t o us. You w e r e always o u r b e s t h u n t e r , a n d t h e ti m e s are hard." Bef or e all t h e g r o u p M o r v c o n f e s s e d his m u r d e r o u s r age a n d its o u t c o m e a n d a s k e d f o r gi v en e ss . T he c hi ef re ac ti on was o n e of s u rp r i s e , a l m o s t of e m b a r r a s s m e n t ; g r e at evil h a d b e e n d o n e b u t life itself wa s evil, a n d n o w an eff or t c o u l d b e m a d e to redeem the wrong. T h e year s w e n t o n . M a n y m a t e d b u t n o c h i l d r e n w e r e c o n c ei ve d. O n e by o n e t h e ol d m e n a n d w o m e n d ie d . It w as a q u e s t i o n w h e t h e r t h e g r o u p m i gh t n o t di e o u t a l t o g e t h e r . And w h a t t h e n o f t h e very last t h r e e , or t w o , o r o n e , left a l o n e a n d t o o w e a k t o f e n d for t h e m s e l v e s ? It did n o t b e a r t h i n k i n g of; t h e y c o u l d n o t avoid t h e k n o w l e d g e , b u t t h e y c o u l d m a k e n o r e a s o n a b l e plans. In a d e s p e r a t e g e s t u r e of e xp i a t io n , M o rv a s k e d a n d Nia c o n s e n t e d , a c q u i e s c e d in by Held, t o c o u p l e again. T h e y all ha d a half f ee li ng t h a t h e w h o h a d t a k e n life m i g h t give it again. An d t h e miracle o c c u r r e d : Nia o n c e m o r e b e c a m e p r e g n a n t . No o t h e r w o m a n in m e m o r y ha d e v e r c o n c e i v e d twice. S h e wa s big with child o n t h e da y w h e n , o n a p l a n et a r o u n d D eneb, strange n o n h u m a n beings peering through telescopes d i s c o v e r e d a n o v a in t h e d i re c ti o n of Vega.
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A fterw ord FREDERIK POHL
T he t h e m e of this b o o k of s c i e n c e fiction stori es fascinat es m e b e c a u s e cities a r e a h o b b y of m i n e . Like Catull us, o d i e t a m o . I h a t e t h e m b e c a u s e t h e y a re d e s t ru c t i ve of n a t u r e a n d m a n ; I love t h e m b e c a u s e t h e y w o r k . I have w o r n o u t m o r e s h o e s o n t h e s tr e et s of a h u n d r e d cities t h a n I e v e r e x p e c t t o b u y again. To m e , t h e onl y way t o k n o w a city is t o walk its s tr eet s, t w e n t y miles o r so of t h e m at least— w h i c h is w h y Los A n ge l e s , for e x a m p l e , is still alien to m e ; o n e d o e s n o t w al k t h e r e , a n d t h e r e f o r e it is har d for m e t o b e lieve t h a t o n e lives t h e r e . I like t o s e e t h e life of t h e r u n - d o w n s l u ms , t h e resident ial a r ea s a n d t h e mar t s of b u s i n e s s , as well as t h e c a t h e d r a l s a n d m u s e u m s . W h a t I k n o w b e s t a b o u t L eningr ad I l e a r n e d t o u r i n g t h e b ac k s tr ee ts with my s o n , e n t e r i n g t h e g r o c e r y s t or e s a n d t h e w i n e s h o p s , w a t c h i n g t h e c o m m u t e r s race t o b o a r d t h e t r ol l e y b u s e s , s t a n d ing on t h e b r id g e s a n d l o o k i n g o u t o v e r t h e b r a n c h e s of t h e Neva. Paris t o m e is t h e w o r k i n g m e n ' s cafés u n d e r M o n t m a r t r e a n d t h e tatty o p u l e n c e of t h e A v e n u e d ' l é n a as well as t h e view u p s t r e a m f r o m t h e lie d e la Cite. T o kyo is t h e d e p a r t m e n t s t o r e s a l o n g t h e Gi nz a a n d t h e t e a m s of sawyer s c u t t i n g d o w n t r e e s t h a t a r e a s p hy x ia t ed with S O 2 . M u n i c h is t h e s h o p p i n g mall u n d e r t h e a n i m a t e d c l oc k a n d t h e b u s t l e of n e w c o n s t r u c tion. I w o n d e r w h a t all t h e s e cities will look like a h u n d r e d ye ar s f r om n o w . I have s e e n s o m e of t h e m o v e r a p e r i o d of d e c a d e s , s e e n t h e m c h a n g e , s e e n t h e m stay t h e s a m e . I d o n o t th ink t h e y will die. £ i t i e s j h a v e a life of t h e i r o w n . 252
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Like all living t h i ng s , t h e y g r o w to Ihe¡r o w n p a t t e r n , n o t ours. This has b e e n a g re at p r o b l e m for t h e p e o p l e w h o plan. Cities d o n o t like to b e p l a n n e d very m u c h . I have ha d a h o b b y of i n te r es t in t h e a t t e m p t s of h u m a n b e i n g s t o i m p o s e thei r f ant asies o n cities— r e bu i l d i n g old o n e s , i n ve n t i ng n e w o n e s like K o m s o m o l s k a n d R e s t o n — w h i c h has led m e o n a lot of e x c u r s i o n s , by way of t h e g r e e n b u s o u t of L o n d o n , t o s e e W e l w y t h C a r d e n City, by a li mp i ng old t w o - e n g i n e pi st on p l an e o n a t h o u s a n d - m i l e r o u n d - t r i p flight f r o m Rio for t h e s a k e of s p e n d i n g t w o h o u r s in t h a t g a u dy , h e a r t b r e a k i n g a n d a lr ea d y o u t m o d e d d r e a m , Brasília. T he y a r e d r e a m s , t h e s e p l a n n e d n e w cities. All of t h e m ar e d r e a m s , a n d m a k i n g t h e m c o m e t r u e d e s t r o y s t h e m . I have n o t s e e n Le C o r b u s i e r ' s p l a n n e d city of C h a n d i g a r h (I will o n e day, if I live l on g e n o u g h ) , b u t I k n o w w h a t s o u r e d t h a t par ti cul ar d r e a m . It was p l a n n e d as t h e capital of a p r o v i n c e, b u t t h e p r o v i n c e split in t w o w h e n India a n d Pakistan d iv id ed , a n d s o it is a city w i t h o u t a f u nc t i on . C o a t s g r az e t h e e s p l a n a d e s . I have s e e n t h e vestigial t r a c e s of t h e A m e ri c a n p l a n n e d cities of t h e 30's; t h e y have b e e n swal l o w e d up, o n e by o n e , by u r b a n sprawl. So f r om all this e v i d e n c e a n d m o r e , I d o n o t t h in k t h a t it is p o s s i bl e for a m a n t o d r e a m a city a n d m a k e it live, any m o r e t h a n it is p o s s i b l e for him t o d r e a m a w o m a n , a n d look u p t o find h e r wa l ki ng d o w n t h e s t r e e t into his life. A n d y e t — An d ye t t h e r e m u s t b e s o m e wa y to m a k e city living j o y o u s as well as p r o d u c t i v e . An d yet t h e r e m u s t b e s o m e magic f o r m u l a t o c r e a t e cities t h a t d o n o t n e e d to d e s t r o y t h e p e o p l e w h o live in t h e m — t h e c ol d rage of N e w Yo rk er s , t h e grim d e s p a i r of M u s c o v i t e s , t h e p a s s i o n a t e c o n t e m p t of Ne a po li t a ns . T h e r e m u s t b e a way, b u t I am n o t s u r e w h e r e it is to b e found. A city is an a c c u m u l a t i o n of a diversity of social capital. T h e a c c u m u l a t i o n is i m p o r t a n t . It is a m a t t e r of scale effect, t hat is, of size. No city is a real city unle ss it c a n s u p p o r t an o p e r a h o u s e , a h o n k y - t o n k a m u s e m e n t a re a, an East Village 253
AFTERWORD
o r H a igh t- As hb ur y, f a ct or ie s, c o l le g es , a s p e c t r u m of c h u r c h e s a n d t e m p l e s , folk d a n c i n g in t h e styles of G r e e c e a n d Spain a n d Israel, a d u l t c o u r s e s in p o t t e r y b a k i n g a n d Sanskrit. I d o n ' t w a n t all of t h o s e t h i n g s for myself. No o n e d o e s . N ot all of t h e m for a n y individual. But u n l e s s t h e y a r e all a vailable, u nl e ss y ou ca n find a pl ac e t o g e t a meal at f o u r in t h e m o r n i n g o r t o b u y an o u t - o f - p ri n t b o o k , t h e n it is n o t a city; it is onl y a h u d d l i n g pl ac e for a lot of p e o p l e . T h e diversity is e qu al ly i m p o r t a n t . W a s h i n g t o n a n d M o s c o w a re n o t really cities. T he y h av e central f u n c t i o n s — g o v e r n m e n t — t h a t o v e r p o w e r e v e r y t h i n g el se t h e y d o . T h e r e is n o diversity. They a re ad h o c h e a d q u a r t e r s e n c a m p m e n t s o n a h u g e scale, b u t t h e y d o n o t give t h e p e o p l e w h o live in t h e m t h e variety of e x p e r i e n c e a n d i n p u t t h a t m a k e s a city w o r k . In this b o o k a n u m b e r of writ ers h av e t o u c h e d o n s o m e of t h e t h i n g s t h a t m a k e cities e ss ent ia l, a n d t ri ed t o p r oj e ct into t h e f u t u r e s o m e o f t h e limitless p o s s i b l e d i r e c t i o n s city d e v e l o p m e n t may t ake. At t h e s a m e t i me t h e y have t u r n e d t h e i r m i c r o s c o p e s o n s o m e of t h e t h i n g s t ha t m a k e cities u n b e a r ab l e, a n d t r ied t o s e e w h a t o t h e r t h i n g s t h e f u t u r e will bring. T h ey a re all pa rt o f t h e s a m e p a t t e r n : p ol l u t io n a n d sexuality, p o w e r failures a n d traffic ja ms , t h e city a b a n d o n e d t o o u r s u c c es s o r s . (But has a ny real city e v e r b e e n a b a n d o n e d ? O n l y R o me , o n c e , for a da y o r t w o ; a n d t h e n t h e p e o p l e c o m e back. All t h e cities t h a t h av e d i s a p p e a r e d a r e w h a t t h e y a re b e c a u s e t h e p e o p l e w e r e forcibly dr iv en away, n o t b e c a u s e t h e y left voluntarily.) I d o n o t k n o w t h a t t h e s e visions e x h a u s t t h e f u t u r e of t h e city. In fact, I am p re tt y s u r e t h e y d o n ot ; I d o n ' t a g r e e t h a t cities a r e in tol er ab le . O r m o r e accur at el y, I t h i n k t h a t e v e n if t h e y a r e i n t o l e r a bl e it d o e s n ' t m a t t e r b e c a u s e w e will g o o n t o l e r at i n g t h e m anyway. For I d o n o t t h ¡ n k t h a t c ¡ v i l i z a t i o n (the b a s e , c¡vitatem , m e a n i n g " t h e city") can survive w i t h o u t cities. In s o m e f o r m. I a m in s o m e d o u b t a b o u t t h e f or m. I k n o w t h e a r g u m e n t s of t h o s e w h o t h in k t h a t t h e f or m is n o t i m p o r t a n t . I like t h e i dea of t h e w o r l d of t h e e x p l o d e d city— " D o n ' t c o m m u t e , corn254
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m u n ¡ c a t e ! " — in w h i c h e v e r y o n e d o e s his o w n t h i n g in his o w n place, linked t o o n e a n o t h e r by e l ec t r o n i c m e d i a r a t h e r t h a n physical proximity. M a y b e this is t h e w a v e of t h e f u t u r e for city bui lding. At t i m e s I h av e t h o u g h t so, a n d h av e b e e n o n e of its p r o p h e t s . Cer tai nl y it is s o t ha t for m o s t of us t h e c o m m u t i n g is p r e p o s t e r o u s l y s u p e r f l u o u s . W e g e t u p in t h e m o r n i n g , e n d u r e an h o u r o r so o n t h e train a n d arrive in a c u b i c l e in a b u i ld in g f r o m w h i c h m o s t of o u r activity has t o d o wi th r e a d i n g p i e c e s of p a p e r t h a t c ro ss o u r d e s k (why n o t r e ad t h e m o n a c a t h o d e - t u b e s c r e e n f r om Biloxi of S a s k a t c h e wan?) , talking to a s s o ci a te s (why n o t j us t pick u p t h e p h o n e a n d o r d e r a c o n f e r e n c e call?) o r sitting in o n m e e t i n g s t hat a r e always difficult t o c o n v e n e (did yo u e v e r try t o g e t five b us y e x ec ut iv es in t h e s a m e r o o m at t h e s a m e time?) a n d o f te n e n o u g h a re i n c on c lu s iv e anyway. Insofar as " t h e city" r e p r e s e n t s to m o s t o f us t h e place w h e r e w e w o r k , a n d g e t o u t of as fast as w e c an w h e n t h e w o r k i n g d a y is t h r o u g h , clearly it c an b e r e p l a c e d by wir es a n d m i c r o w a v e relays. Yet t ha t is n o t all t h a t a city d o e s . You c an dial an a s so ci at e o n t h e p h o n e a n d talk to him. But y o u c a n ' t r un into him o n t h e p h o n e ; t h e c h a n c e e n c o u n t e r in a r e s t a u r a n t , o n a s t r ee t , o n l y h a p p e n s w h e n t h e r e is physical p r e s e n c e . You d o n o t n e e d t o g o t o a c o n c e r t hall t o h e a r a c o n c e r t . But t h e r e is a j oy a n d a p u r p o s e t o b e i n g physically p r e s e n t in a pl ac e with o t h e r p e o p l e w h o a r e l i k e - m i n d e d , at least in t h a t t h e y t o o w a n t t o b e p r e s e n t in t h a t pl ac e for w h a t e v e r is g oi ng o n. You c a n ' t e v e n i m a g i ne a political rally e x p l o d e d into t e n t h o u s a n d s e p a r a t e h o m e s , v i e w e d by TV. T h e s p e e c h e s w o u l d b e t h e s a m e , b u t t h e c r o w d e x c i t e m e n t w o u l d n o t exist. H ea r in g Be r ns te i n' s M ass o n r e c o r d s , e v e n w a t c h i n g it o n TV, is n o t t h e s a m e as sitting in an a u d i t o r i u m with f o u r o r five t h o u s a n d o t h e r p e o p l e w h o , like y o u , a re b e i n g b o m b a r d e d by t h e q u a d r ¡ p h o n i c a mpli fi ed s o u n d a n d s a t u r a t e d with t h e c o l o r a n d m o v e m e n t o n t h e st age. For all t h e s e r e a s o n s , I t h i n k t h a t city life is a failed e x p e r i m e n t t h a t w e will n e v e r give u p o n. 255
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T h e cities I k n o w be st , N e w York a n d L o n d o n , a r e a b s o l u t e failures in s o m e very e ss e nt ia l ways. N e w York is dirty, noisy, p r e p o s t e r o u s l y e x p e n s i v e a n d essentially u n sa f e. Not e v e ry p e r s o n w h o c o m e s t o N e w York gets r o b b e d , r a p e d o r m u r d e r e d . But n o p e r s o n is e x e m p t , a n d f ew a re as of t h e city a r e wholl y s e c u r e ; in N e w York y o u r p e r s o n is always at risk. Lo n d on is physically safer, b u t it is also dirty, also noi sy a n d rapidly b e c o m i n g j us t as p r e p o s t e r o u s l y e x p e n s i v e . N o t o nl y a r e t h e s e t h in gs t r u e n o w ; t h e y h a ve b e e n t r u e p r e tt y ge ne ra l ly t h r o u g h o u t t h e hi st ory of b o t h cities— f o u r h u n d r e d year s of history for N e w York, t w o t h o u s a n d y ea rs for L o n d o n . T h e y h ave a l m os t always b e e n dirty, noisy, e x p e n s i v e a n d u n s a fe , in n o way fit t o live in. An d ye t t h e y survive. It is this p a r a d o x t h a t g u a r a n t e e s t h e f u t u r e of t h e city as an insti tut ion. W h e n i ns tit ut io ns survive d o g g e d l y in spi t e o f i n c o n t r o v e r t i ble i n d ic at io ns t h a t t h e y a r e u n s t a b l e , i n a d e q u a t e a n d d o o m e d , it says s o m e t h i n g a b o u t t h e va lu e of t h e inst it ut ions. Th ey are so n e e d e d t h a t t h e y c a n n o t b e a l l o w e d t o fail. W h a t e v e r t he ir faults, t h e i r v ir tues o u t w e i g h t h e m . An d t h u s it is with cities. W e have t h e m , a n d w e will always h av e t h e m . . . as l o n g as w e h a ve civilization at all.
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