Joanna Blake - Player (ang)

PLAYER Joanna Blake

Copyright © 2015 Joanna Blake Pincushion Press, Inc. All rights reserved.

Cover credits Kruse Images & Photography Rebel Edit & Design Lance Jones Model

For the boy that started it all.

Chapters Chapter One - Comedown Chapter Two - Grown Chapter Three - Downtown Chapter Four - Turndown Chapter Five - Unknown Chapter Six - Knockdown Chapter Seven -Shutdown Chapter Eight - Disown Chapter Nine - Misthrown Chapter Ten - Letdown Chapter Eleven - Breakdown Chapter Twelve - Thrown Chapter Thirteen - Meltdown Chapter Fourteen - Countdown Chapter Fifteen - Cooldown Chapter Sixteen - Shakedown Chapter Seventeen - Misknown Chapter Eighteen - Teardown Chapter Nineteen - Showdown Chapter Twenty - Windblown Chapter Twenty One - Lockdown Chapter Twenty Two -Own Chapter Twenty Three - Crackdown Chapter Twenty Four - Touchdown Six Months Later

Excerpt of Bound To Me Excerpt of BRO’ Excerpt of A Bad Boy For Summer

Chapter One James

“Yo’ Fitz! Your turn man.” I looked up to see Kyle grinning stupidly as the stripper finished grinding on him. The song was ending and Kyle had his hands all over the dancer’s generous ass. The girl, Crystal something or other, was only wearing a g-string. Her tanned skin gleamed in the dim light. I drank deeply from my twenty-dollar beer. Thankfully drinks were free for the team. As were the lap dances. And anything else that might arise. Players frequently went home with the dancers from the club. I had myself more than once. The girls were severely hot and more than accommodating. Not to mention flexible. I shook my head. To be honest, I felt kind of disgusting the last time I woke up next to a girl whose makeup was smeared all over the pillow case. And the sheets. And my cock. When I was drunk, then yeah, I didn’t mind so much. But after… Lately all the girls I boned made me feel that way. The strippers, the groupies, the co-eds. I’d even picked up a housewife at a bar just a week ago. Well, to be honest.

She’d picked me up. But something about it was leaving me unsatisfied. More than unsatisfied. I felt fucking dirty. If I was honest, I preferred the natural look. Like that gorgeous brunette in my economy class. She might be a freshman, but she had all the right equipment. Huge green eyes, a cute nose, gorgeous lips, and the best tits I’d seen in my entire life. My God those tits could stop traffic. Not to mention her legs were about a mile long. They’d look nice wrapped around me as I drove in and out of her sweet little box. I adjusted my junk. I was hard just thinking about it. The dancer walked towards me with a question in her eyes. “I’ll pass.” I wasn’t drunk enough to enjoy this tonight. Even after winning yet another game. I should be riding high but instead I just wanted to be alone. The thing was, I was hardly fucking ever alone. My teammates, the fans, girls. I was the center of attention. Non-stop. Growing up, I’d had the opposite problem. My mom had worked two jobs. Sometimes three. And we’d still been dirt poor. Fuck, poorer than that.

Mud poor. If you’d ever seen the neighborhood I grew up in, it was probably on the news. Some reporter talking about crime

rates. Or how depressed the south side of Chicago was. And how everyone who lived there was either a vandal or a hoodlum. Or both. I’d like to say that I hadn’t been one of those criminals but that would be a lie. I’d jacked car stereos, bikes, anything. The only thing that had saved me from ending up in prison was football. The sport of kings. Look at me now. I was the top of the heap. The King of Kings. And I was still fucking covered in mud.

Nadine

“God Damnit!” I grabbed my shin where I’d banged it against the radiator by the front door. Trying to get out of the crappy apartment I was subletting was like running a fucking obstacle course. Never mind that I technically slept in the kitchen. My ‘room’ was a twin bed with a shower curtain that partitioned my section of the kitchen off. It was a big kitchen, but still, I knew it was pretty bad. To be honest, I was just grateful for a place to stow my stuff and sleep. It wasn’t glamorous but it got the job done. I didn’t exactly spend a lot of time there. Still, my current situation was better than where I’d come from that was for sure. And as a student, I could hang out in the library or student commons. The free computer labs were a lifesaver. That’s where I did all my work too. But I still ended up each night in home sweet shit hole. The hallway lightbulb had been burned out since I moved in. None of the four students who lived in the tiny one bedroom apartment cared enough to replace it. In fact, the only parts of the house that were clean were the kitchen and bathroom.

Because I fucking cleaned them. Cleanliness is next to Godliness. That’s what my mother always said. She’d said it with a bottle in one hand and a smoke in the other. And she slurred. Every time. It was hard to take a person seriously when they slurred. But I’d fucking well learned how to clean. I’d learned how to study too, even with the shouting and loud music that had come from downstairs. I was damned if I was going to end up like her. It was barely dawn as I headed out for my first job. I had a very tight schedule. It usually started with work-study that was arranged for through the financial aid department. It paid shit but it was part of the program I was in. If I wanted the aid, I had to do their crap jobs. Then I had classes, with a few short breaks that I spent studying. I dozed off a lot in the school’s library. Once I’d accidentally spent the night in there by accident. Scared the shit out of the security guard in the morning, let me tell you. After school I headed to BB Smith’s. It was a honky tonk rib place not far from campus. That’s where I made the money that paid for my tuition and my cheap ass rent. Thankfully, the owner had taken a liking to me and gave me the night shifts five or six days a week. Otherwise I would be stuck working lunch or some shit. The tips came late at night when people got drunk and rowdy. My upbringing had more than prepared me to deal with that. A soft mewling sound got my attention as I left the

building. I bent down to stroke the mangy cat that lived in the alley. “I didn’t forget you, Honeysuckle.” I pulled a can out of my bag and popped the top. Then I scratched behind her ears while she gobbled it down. I said goodbye, wondering like always if I would see her again. Somehow though, she always showed up. It was a rough life for a street cat. I could definitely relate. The scrappy little cat had a lot of personality. And her fur was so soft. She kept herself clean, even living on the streets like she did. I would have brought her inside but we weren’t allowed pets. And I couldn’t afford to go anywhere else. So I fed her and hoped for the best. We were all on our own in life anyway.

Chapter Two James

I stepped out of the shower, debating about whether to get a rub down. Daily massages were just one of the amenities they offered to the players. It definitely helped with recovery. But I was feeling restless today. I wasn’t exactly sure why. Kyle and Pete came up and slapped my back. “Fucking A man. You slaughtered that ball today!” I nodded. I was used to praise. I took it as my due. “Thanks.” “Let’s get some fucking food man.” I nodded. “Yeah, okay.” “I want ribbbbbs!” Pete laughed as Kyle ran ahead, acting like a monkey. He yanked down Coleman’s pants, pissing off the giant linebacker. Never a good idea. Nobody would mistake Kyle for a genius.

“Let’s get some barbecue motherfuckers!” I rolled my eyes and went to get changed. Nobody would dream of yanking my pants down. Not only because I was strong with lightning fast reflexes. Not only because I didn’t have much of a sense of humor these days. Not just because I was the only one of these mother fuckers who’d ever really used a knife or held a gun. It was a sign of respect. You didn’t fuck with the quarterback. It was a rule. Even if I’d been some second rate dip shit. Which, I was not. Far from it. I knew that only a handful of guys were going to make it to the pros when they left school. I’d been fielding offers since Freshman year. But fuck that, none of them had offered me enough money yet. And when you went pro, you best be ready. Otherwise you could get fucked up. Big time. I was four years in. I was even thinking about finishing up. Getting my degree. That would shut up the people back home who’d said I’d never amount to anything. Sometimes though, all I could think about was cashing in and getting out. “Who’s driving?” I held up my hand and they followed me out to my SUV. It had been a gift from the college when I signed up to play for them. One of many, many gifts. Fuck, they even gave my mom a car. Sometimes it was good to be in demand.

Even if I wanted everyone to shut the hell up about it. “Shotgun!” Kyle slid into the passenger seat and four other guys loaded into the back. It was laughable, seeing those huge guys all squished up together like that. That would never be me. I didn’t ride in the back. Fuck that shit, I’d rather walk. I drove downtown to the cultural center. Not that it amounted to much, but there were a few decent restaurants down here. A team favorite was BB Smith’s. I hadn’t been there in a while though. The moment I stepped in the door I saw her. The hot little filly from economy. She was wearing a vneck t-shirt that said the name of the restaurant, skintight jeans, sneakers and a cute little apron. Fuck if I didn’t feel my balls swell up at the sight of her. The hostess walked over to us, carrying menus. “Welcome to BB Smith’s. Can I seat you?” I jerked my head toward the filly. This was gonna be good. I actually might get my dick wet in some quality tang for once. “Put us in her section.”

Nadine

I ran my hand over my lower back, wincing. I’d been on my feet all day, and this was my first real break. I leaned against the bar, sipping a Shirley Temple. I was so tired, I could barely feel anything. I closed my eyes and felt myself start to drift off. Standing up. Well, that had to be a first. Lana grabbed me suddenly, whispering in my ear. “He’s here.” I opened my eyes, supremely disinterested. “Who?” “The quarterback! Oh my God, the things I would do to him…” I rolled my eyes at Lana. She had a thing for the football players. Most of the girls on campus did. And off campus. It was a football town. Especially for Fitz. Everyone but me. I grimaced, turning to look his way. Dark hair, blue eyes, muscles upon muscles. And let’s not forget the winning smile. And dimples. Fitz had really good dimples.

A flood of memories overwhelmed me for a moment. Growing up South Side. His mother feeding me when my own couldn’t be bothered. Which was more often than not. Hiding underneath their porch when things got too crazy at home. Mrs. Fitzpatrick almost always found me though. She’s bring me inside, clean me up and make me something hot to eat. He’d been there, a lot of the time. He’d called me Brat usually. Pulled my pigtails once or twice and ignored me. I couldn’t have ignored him if I tried. James ‘Fitz’ Fitzpatrick. Gorgeous. Strong. Popular. He’d been everything I was not. Well liked at school. Attractive. Talented. Not to say he’d been a model student. He’s run wild all over South Side. But it hadn’t mattered. No matter what kind of shit James Fitzpatrick got into, he always came up smelling like roses. I knew. Because I grew up right next door to him. In fact, I’d spent my entire adolescence madly in love with him. A fucking jock who barely knew I was alive. I’d worked hard to get him out of my head and my stupid, teenage heart. And now he was here, in my face.

Fuck me. “You got a table.” “Give it to Lana.” “They asked for you.” I stared at Jess, our hostess. She didn’t have a clue

what was going through my head. Guys asked for my section all the time. It was a sex thing, I knew. Around sixteen I’d sprouted boobs and since then I’d been beating off men with a stick. So I wasn’t surprised. But this was different. This was Fitzy. Once again, fuck me.

Chapter Three James

“What can I get you?” I smiled charmingly at the waitress. I’d been watching her since we sat down. She’d taken her sweet ass time getting over here. Those long legs of hers had basically fucking strolled across the room. Almost like she was being dragged over. She hadn’t even glanced our way as she tended to all her other tables. I noticed she hadn’t bothered to introduce herself either. None of that chirpy waitress talk that I was used to. Zero feminine wiles. But damn, if she didn’t look good. Grouchy, but good.

Really, really good. I smiled at her, hoping to cut to the chase. “Hi sweetheart. What’s your name?” She stared at me, a look of incredulity on her face. Then slowly, in the most condescending way possible,

she lifted her finger and poked her chest. Right on her fucking name tag. Nadine. I almost laughed. She was being such a bitch, it was like she didn’t want our money. But she was going to get it anyway. A really, really big tip. My tip, if I had anything to say about it. I leaned back, letting my eyes slide down her body while everyone else ordered. By the time she turned to me, I’d leisurely inspected every inch of her. Twice. She knew it too, judging from the bright red blush staining her cheeks. The glare I was getting would have deterred a lesser man. But I liked challenges. Hell, I fucking lived for them. And this one had a sweet ass reward at the end. I smirked, imagining her underneath me. I’d make her squeal for me. I liked the sound of that. I handed her my menu, making sure our fingers touched. She froze, staring at my hand on hers. Tingles shot up my arm. And that was just from our fingers touching. I couldn’t wait to see what happened when we bumped nasties.

Nadine

Men were idiots. Dogs. PIGS. And James Fitzgerald was the worst of the bunch. The King of the Morons. UGH! I put the order in and went to pick up their drinks. They were all drinking beer except Fitz. He had been staring at my tits when he ordered his soda. I wanted to pour it over his damn head! I smiled to myself suddenly. Maybe I should. All I had to do was trip… I shook my head. I needed this job. I couldn’t risk it over a guy- especially one who didn’t know I was alive until he noticed my boobs! To think I’d once thought he was special! He was just like every other guy on the planet. Gross. I carried the tray over and handed out mugs and two pitchers of beer. I went back and forth to the bar twice to get everything. James kept checking out my ass every time

I bent over. I could feel his eyes on me. It was almost like he was touching me. I couldn’t help myself. I slammed his drink down but it only made him chuckle. Then I hurried into the back to hide.

Damn him. I felt hot and cold all over. Nervous. Angry. Excited. I realized I was on the verge of tears. Not sad tears. Angry tears. Very, very angry. Nobody got under my skin. Not the drunks who tried to paw me here. Not the rich kids on campus who took college for granted. Not even the girls who threw money around like it was nothing. James had gotten under my skin without doing a damn thing. All he’d had to do was look at me. Express interest… it’s too bad he couldn’t have done that when I really needed it. Back then, I would have done anything for him. But now? Hell to the no. I almost laughed when I realized he was about to get the surprise of his life. Girls bent over backwards for him. They always had. But tonight, things were not going to go well for him. At all. Fitzy was just going to have to deal with disappointment. “Order up Nadine!” I’d been mindlessly cleaning the sides station when Dave called out my order. I swallowed, brushing my cheeks. They were dry.

Good. I never cried. Not since I was eleven and my mom’s boyfriend had given my dog away. That was the last time. I swore I would never cry again. Except sometimes I woke up with wet cheeks. I guess even I couldn’t keep my demons at bay in my dreams.

Chapter Four James

“You’re in my E-Con class.” The waitress froze as she bent forward, placing my ribs in front of me. She was so close I could smell her hair. I inhaled deeply. Vanilla and something else… Something warm and spicy. Edible. Cinnamon maybe. Fuck, she smelled good. Good enough to eat. Abruptly she straightened up. Right as I’d been about to reach out and touch her. She gave me a look of pure disdain. “Yeah, so?” “So, how do you work here and go to school full-time?” She narrowed her eyes at me. She was pissed. It just made her look sexier. “How do you play ball and go to school full-time?” I leaned back, grinning at her. “So, you do know who I am.” She rolled her eyes and stomped away, not even

bothering to ask us if we needed anything else. She was a terrible waitress. The worst I’d ever had. The other guys had even noticed, and they didn’t notice much. It was almost as if she had taken a dislike to me. Me, in particular. It didn’t matter. I wanted her. And I was going to have her. I ate my food, enjoying watching the girl try to avoid my gaze. She was a feisty little thing. I liked that. I liked it a lot. I licked my fingers, imagining it was her I was licking. She had lots of different yummy parts I’d like to get my tongue on. She glanced over and scowled at me. It was almost as if she knew what I was thinking. Fuck, with those piercing eyes, maybe she did. By the time she brought over the check, my cock felt like it was going to tear its way through my jeans. It lurched as she stood there, avoiding my eyes. I needed to get home and spank it. Fuck, I needed to go to the bathroom and spank it. Or the car. I groaned, realizing how much longer I was going to have to wait to rub this one out. Getting home with a car full of guys was going to be torture. It’s too bad she seemed uninclined to take me in the back and provide relief… a lot of girls wanted to blow me just for kicks. Just for the story. Our pretty little waitress was definitely not in that category.

I had a sudden vision of her scratching the fuck out of me during sex. Biting too. Damn, if that didn’t sound good. “Can I get you anything else?” Everyone said no. She started to rip off the check and I grabbed her wrist, holding it. “How about your number sweetheart?” She narrowed her eyes at me and shook me off. Then she slowly peeled off the check and let it flutter to the table. She leaned towards me and crooked her finger. I leaned in eagerly, not seeing the mocking look on her face until it was too late. “Sorry Fitzy. You’re just not my type.” The guys started laughing. I cursed and stood up. Fuck it. I’d try again tomorrow. No girl had ever turned me down before. Fuck if I’d let her get the last word. Well, maybe if the last word was ‘Yes Fitzy, please Fitzy, oh God YES Fitzy!’ Then and there, I decided. This girl was going down. By the end of the week, I was gonna own her ass.

Nadine

I woke up, a scream on my lips. I touched them. I could never tell if I’d really screamed or not. I’d had the dream again. It was not so much a dream as a memory. Of the night I ran away. It had been a while since I had it though. Seeing James must have brought it back. He was just another ghost from a time that I didn’t care to revisit. I shook my head, trying to banish him, and rolled over. My body was sore from standing on my feet all day and night for weeks. It felt like I’d been unable to rest for months really. Years. I glanced at my phone. 5:40 am. There was no way I was getting back to sleep before my 6 am wake up call. I decided to take a long, hot shower and blow dry my hair. Something I rarely had the leisure time to do.

I rolled to my feet and into my shoes. With all the creepy crawlies I’d seen in this place, I never went barefoot. Ever. I grabbed my little bucket of toiletries and shuffled towards the bathroom, thoughts of shaving and loofahs, and actually taking time to condition my hair floating through my head. Maybe I’d even put on make up for once. I pushed the door open and froze. The bathroom was a disaster. Towels on the floor, hair in the drain, a ring in the tub. Even the wastebasket was overflowing.

Disgusting. I sighed, realizing my extra fifteen minutes was going to be spent cleaning this mess up. It wasn’t enough time to really even do it justice, but fuck me if I was going to step into a dirty shower. I grabbed the can of scrubbing powder and a clean sponge. I got to work, feeling a sense of accomplishment as the dirt disappeared under my hands. Twenty minutes later I stepped out of my short, unsatisfactory shower. At least I was clean. And the bathroom was less horrifying than it had been. I towel dried my hair and stuck my wet feet back into my sneakers. Then I shuffled back into the kitchen to change. A clean pair of jeans, bra, t-shirt and my ancient denim jacket. It was worn through in spots but I loved that stupid old thing. Then I grabbed my bag, not forgetting to shove a can of cat food inside.

Honeysuckle was waiting for me as usual. Each time I saw her, my heart melted just a little bit. Most of the time, I made myself stay hard. I had to. I spent the rest of the day dealing with assholes and reminding myself how shitty life was for someone like me. Toughening up. It was vital that I kept a thick skin. Especially today. It had been in the back of my mind all morning. There as no use denying it. I was dreading and looking forward to it in equal measure. Today I had my economy class. I’d known he was there of course. The moment I walked in the door during the first class. I’d seen him and I’d felt my heart leap into my throat. But I’d been careful to sit out of his sight lines. I hadn’t stared at him, or even spared him more than a glance. Even though I’d wanted to. Tall, dark hair, blue as sky eyes. Damned if he wasn’t the best looking boy I’d ever laid eyes on. Scratch that. He was a man now. Boy was he ever. And now that he’d noticed me, there was no way I was going to be able to avoid him. I could drop the class. But then I’d lose the money and the credits. And my scholarship might be in danger. Still, I seriously considered it for a minute. Then again he could just come into BB Smith’s any time

he wanted to eat ribs, or hit on the surly waitress. I hadn’t dissuaded him by being rude. No, it had the opposite effect. Somehow, I’d made myself into a challenge for the mighty, mighty James Fitzgerald. Fuck that! I was not about to let myself be turned into a prize! I stood on the steps leading to the E-Con building for almost ten minutes, willing myself to go in. I was nervous, yes. But I was also feeling a strange sense of excitement. That pissed me off. I didn’t want to want to see him. That’s when I felt it. A hand slide up against my lower back. “Well, well, well.”

Speak of the fucking devil. I turned sharply, trying to dislodge his hand. Instead I ended up smashing my nose into his chest. He grinned at me, his body throwing off waves of heat. “Waiting for me?” “You wish.” I rolled my eyes, trying to step away. But he boxed me in against the wall of the building. His thick arms creating a blockade on either side of me. His hand came up and stroked my cheek. Despite myself, I felt a thrill at his touch. The bastard. “I do wish.”

My mouth opened. The man had nerve. He really did. He cocked an eyebrow at me, still grinning like a predator. “So what is your type?” I tilted my head to stare at him coldly. Even though inside I was hot. Very, very hot. “Someone who doesn’t make me late for class.” James was staring at my lips. Like he might kiss me. For a second, I almost hoped he would. Then he stepped back abruptly and opened his arms. “By all means, let’s go to class.”

Chapter Five James

I leaned back in my seat, letting my arm slide across the chair beside me. Nadine glared at me, but I didn’t care. I had three blissful hours of sitting beside her, touching her, smelling her. And she was hating every second of it. For some reason, that just made it more fun. I tilted my head to the side so that my lips almost brushed her ear. “Where are you from?” She ignored me, trying to focus on the professor. So I upped my game, running one finger along her neck. I smirked when she scooted to the side, making the guy on her left turn to look at her. The guy did a double take, his eyes raking over her. He smiled at her like she was a delicious little morsel. Which of course, she was. Now it was my turn to get annoyed. Nadine gave me a

look and then smiled flirtatiously at the guy. He had no idea that his life was in imminent danger. I reached down and dragged her chair up against mine, making a loud noise. People turned to stare and I waved at them. Then I slung my arm around her and stared straight ahead, focusing on the class. That should make sure every guy in here knew she was off limits. She elbowed me and I ignored her. Finally she gave up and went back to listening to the lecture. I grinned, enjoying the feel of her sexy little body pressed against my side. I turned my head and took a deep sniff of her hair. “Hmmm… you smell delicious.” “Cut it out!” “Shhhhh, I’m trying to pay attention Nadine!” She rolled her eyes and pretended to ignore me. I noticed she used a legal pad and a pen instead of a laptop. It was cute. She was furiously scribbling away, trying to focus on the class. Good luck with that! I spent the rest of the lecture with her squeezed up next to me. By the time the class was over, I could almost see the puffs of smoke coming out of her ears. “Thanks a lot Fitz!” “What?” She stared at me, her eyes looking especially sparkly. That’s when I realized they were shiny with tears.

Oh shit. Was she going to cry? I didn’t mean to make her cry.

Uh… nope. She let out a laugh. It was condescending. It was sarcastic. It was disdainful. But she looked hot as hell doing it. “You don’t even know who I am do you, Fitzy?” I stared at her, blinking. Had we already knocked boots? I was sure I would remember her but who knows. I gave her my best puppy dog eyes. “If I did not behave like a gentleman, then you have every right to be mad at me.” She laughed again. “Let me make it up to you darlin’.” She rolled her eyes, stuffing her notebook into her ratty looking backpack. For the first time I noticed that everything about her was kind of shabby. Except, well, her. She was anything but. “Did you enjoy it at least?” She shoved past me and I grabbed my stuff, dodging through the crowd to keep up. The girl had long ass legs. And she was using them to get as far away from me as possible. “Keep dreaming Fitzy.” There was something in her voice that made me stop dead in my tracks. Something familiar. I watched her take two steps. Three. That hunched over way of walking… sexy as hell but also somehow… hiding. I knew it.

I knew her. “Deanie?!?” She turned, her gorgeous green eyes blazing. She lifted her hand and saluted me sarcastically. I could hardly believe it. Scrappy little Deanie had grown up. And she grew up right. I ran after her. She glanced at me but didn’t stop walking. “I can’t believe its you, Deanie.” “Don’t call me that.” “Sorry. Nadine. I can’t believe it’s you.” She stopped walking and stared at me. “Damn Brat, you grew up right!” Her mouth opened slightly. She looked annoyed with me. And also, kind of sad. I snapped my fingers. “Wait, didn’t you run away from home?” She glanced at me again, a world of hurt in her eyes. Then something clicked and the tough, hot as hell girl was back. She tossed her hair and strode away, saying nothing. I followed her of course. Nothing could have stopped me from getting to the bottom of this now. From getting to the bottom of her. Finally, I grabbed her arm and made her stop walking and face me. “When you were going to tell me? Before, or after?” She stared at me, not comprehending what I was implying. Then slowly I saw realization dawn in her eyes.

Her mouth opened. I resisted the urge to kiss her. It was a good thing too, because I would have missed her foot coming for my shin. “You pig!” “Hey, hey! I’m just kidding Deanie. Learn how to take a joke!” She just stared at me, a look of utter confusion in her eyes. Almost like she forgot where she was for a second. Then she mumbled something about being late for work and took off. I thought about chasing her. But that would be stupid. Especially since I knew where exactly she was going. I decided I was in the mood for ribs tonight. Tomorrow night too. And every night until I got what I was after.

Her.

Nadine

I stood behind the bar, hiding. James was here, again. It was the third night in a row he’d put himself in my station. Tonight he was alone. Girls kept approaching him as he sat there, but he sent them away. He pretended to be watching the game on the big screen. But that’s not what he was watching. He was watching me. The problem was, I was starting to like it. I could not deny it any longer. He was wearing down my defenses. Doggedly pursuing me with escalating intensity. Every time I felt his eyes on me, I got tingly all over. Is that what girls felt when they liked someone? I never had the time or inclination. Not since I’d run away. Not since James. I looked up from the salt and pepper shakers I was refilling. Casey, the manager, had just flicked the lights. James was staring at me again. Fuck me, was he ever going to give up?

For some crazy reason, I felt like the answer was no. And for some crazy reason I liked that idea. I liked it a lot. Crap. I liked him. There was no use denying it any longer. He was winning. I knew in my heart he was going to hurt me. It was inevitable. Especially for a man whore like him. But it didn’t change a damn thing. A warm feeling pooled in my stomach as I walked over to him. He was my last table. I swallowed nervously. Realizing how I felt had changed everything suddenly. Now I had something to lose.

Him. “Can I get you anything else?” He was watching me carefully. Not leering for once. Just looking at me. Seeing me. We both knew in that moment that something had changed. I’d stopped fighting. He’d stopped chasing. It was starting. Whatever ‘it’ was. He shook his head slowly. I nodded and put the check down. I started to walk away and stopped. “You don’t have to leave me a crazy tip.” He smiled at me. “I want to.” I shook my head. “You shouldn’t. You need the money too.” He raised an eyebrow at me and put a hundred dollar bill

on the table. Then he added another one. My eyes bulged out of my head. Was he trying to buy me? Was it pity? Fuck if I’d let him pity me! I crossed my arms over my chest. “Take that back.” He crossed his arms. “No.” I stared at him, ignoring the money. I was about to cry. Again. Why did I let him get to me?

Because he could… “I’m not for sale Fitz!” He grabbed me as I walked away, pulling me against him. “I know that. I’m just compensating for taking up your table all night.” I looked up at him. I nodded shakily. Then I laughed. “Okay fine. But half that.” He smiled sensuously, nodding at me. “Okay.” I stepped away, grabbing one of the hundreds and the check. “It’s still too much.” He shrugged and sat down again. He waited while I cleaned up. I didn’t say a word. Neither did he. But we both knew he was taking me home tonight. Beyond that, I was afraid to think about anything else that

might happen too closely. Casey paid me and James walked out with me. He clicked his keys and his car unlocked. He was parked right out front. He slipped his arm around me. It felt natural. More than natural. It felt right. “Come on.” I hesitated. I was starting to think I shouldn’t go with him. I was bone tired. My judgement was off. And I knew what he was after. I wasn’t ready to give in completely. “I’m tired Jimmy…” He laughed. “No one has called me that since I was ten.” He squeezed my shoulders. “I just want to take you home. No more walking okay?” I glanced at him. Had he been following me home the past few nights? A warm feeling filled me when I realized he must have been. I nodded. I was too exhausted to argue. He drove me home in silence. I think neither one of us wanted to mess things up. It was a comfortable silence though. It was weird, feeling like all this was so new, even though I’d known him forever. Not like this though. Never like this. He pulled over in front of my apartment. He had been following me. I looked at him, one eyebrow raised. He shrugged.

“I didn’t like the idea of you walking home late at night.” “Why?” “I feel protective of you.” I rolled my eyes. “Because I’m like a sister to you?” He leaned forward, his knuckles softly grazing my cheek. “No. Definitely not.” His eyes were on my lips. I knew he was going to kiss me. I realized I wanted him to. So help me. I did. He leaned closer, his breath intermingling with mine. He smelled good. Clean. Like pine and something indefinable… but masculine. Very, very masculine. His lips brushed mine. Once. Twice. They were soft. Unbelievably soft. “Jesus, Nadine…” Then he enfolded me in his big arms, hauling me up against his massive chest. I felt safe. Protected. Desired. All at the same time. He moaned and nudged my lips open. The moment I opened my mouth, the kiss went crazy. His tongue darted inside, stroking mine, twirling against it. I heard a breathy sigh. It was me. I made that noise.

EEEEEEOOOOWWWWWW! I froze, not sure what I was hearing for a second. Then I did. It was a cat. And someone was hurting it.

Honeysuckle.

I was out of the car in two seconds flat, running for the alleyway. There were a group of boys. They were throwing things at the cat. I felt nauseous when I realized they had tied something to her tail. A brick. What the fuck was wrong with people? I threw myself at them, screaming like a banshee. Later, I would barely remember it. But at the moment, everything was crystal clear. Face. Punched. Knee. Kicked. Elbow. Thrown. Then James was there, pulling me off them. Telling them to fuck off. Calling them a bunch of little shits. I was in a daze, struggling to get free. But his hands were like vices. He held me until I stopped struggling. I forced myself to calm down, breathing slow and deep. He let me go and I knelt by the furry lump on the pavement. Tenderly, I untied the string that held the brick to her damaged tail. It was bent, hanging loosely. Her fur was matted with blood. She mewled at me pathetically and the tears started to fall. “Hey, it’s okay.” “No, it’s not! They hurt her!” “Is that your cat?” I shrugged. “Kind of. I feed her. We aren’t allowed to have pets.” I stared up at James, my tears flowing freely. “She’s hurt. I need to get her to the vet.”

He was staring at me, looking concerned. Then he nodded. “Okay. Let me get something to wrap her in.” He was back in two minutes. He helped me lift the cat gently, placing her in a jacket he’d gotten from his car. Then we went back to the car. I cried all the way to the emergency animal hospital on the other side of the city. By the time we got there, Honeysuckle was barely moving.

Chapter Six James

I stared down at the girl sleeping on my shoulder. Even exhausted and tearstained, she was beautiful. And she was hurting. Badly. Her reaction to the cat had taken me off guard to be sure. But not in a bad way. I was in awe of her. She was braver than anyone I’d ever met. And more soft hearted than she let on. Not to mention the best damn kisser I’d met in my life. And I’d kissed a lot of girls. A lot, a lot. Too many probably. I stroked my hand over the smoothness of her hair. Even after a long day and night of slinging ribs and beer, she smelled incredible. Almost too good. I loved the way she was curled up against me in the animal hospital’s waiting room. She trusted me, even if she wouldn’t admit it. I closed my eyes, trying to conjure up images of the scrappy little girl she’d been. Her parents had fought a lot.

Lots of drinking and loud music. But that was the norm for our part of Chicago. Still, there must have been something else. Something that I couldn’t quite put my finger on. Something bad enough to make her run away. “Where have you been hiding, my little Deanie?” She didn’t answer my softly spoken question, just curled into my shoulder a little more. I smiled and kissed her head. She was letting me in. That’s what I wanted. What I was starting to realize was that this wasn’t just a fling. I could not just tag her and move on. Fuck, for the first time in my life, I didn’t want to. Besides, I would beat anybody’s ass who tried to date her for, basically, the rest of her life. My eyes snapped open when I realized the direction my thoughts were heading. What the fuck was I thinking about anyway? Was I falling for a girl I hadn’t even tagged yet? That scared the hell out of me, no lie.

Snap out of it Fitzgerald! I shook my head. Better to stay focused on what mattered: my next game, and getting into Deanie’s pants. I wanted her in my bed. End of story. How long I kept her there was a different matter altogether. It was another half an hour before the Veterinarian came out. Gently, I shook Deanie awake. “Wake up, sweetie.” She blinked, her eyes soft and out of focus. I couldn’t

help thinking about waking her up for a different reason… middle of the night sex came to mind. And morning sex. And afternoon sex. My cock twitched in my pants. There was no more awkward place on Earth than an animal hospital to get a God Damn boner. Well, church might be more awkward. But barely. “So, the bad news is she got banged up pretty bad. Broken tail. But she’s strong. Most street cats we see are malnourished. And she wasn’t. So she’s ahead of the game.” Nadine squeezed my hand. I hadn’t even noticed that our fingers were intertwined. I squeezed hers back. “So she’s okay?” “It’s touch and go. But we think she’ll be alright. Are you the owner?” Nadine stood up and nodded. “I- I am. I mean I feed her sometimes. She’s a good girl.” The vet nodded. “We’ve got her on an IV drip. We need to keep her for a few more days. I would keep her inside from now on though.” Nadine nodded and I felt my heart twist. I had a strong suspicion she wouldn’t be able to pay for this. I grabbed the business card and pocketed it. I was going to take care of it for her. She wouldn’t like that but I didn’t care. It was my money and my decision. I drove her home in silence. Dawn was lighting up the sky as I pulled in front of her apartment. Only now could I

see how shitty the place really was. It made her old house in south side look like a palace. I turned toward her, brushing her hair away from her face. She looked tired. But still achingly beautiful. “Are you working tomorrow night?” “No. It’s my night off.” “Can I see you?” She glanced at me, as if she’d forgotten who I was. What I was trying to be to her. She smiled ruefully, shaking her head. “I need to look for a new place to live.” She leaned forward and pecked my lips. “One that allows cats.” “Can you afford another place, Deanie?” “I will figure something out. And James?” I stared into those incredible eyes of hers, feeling lost. “Thank you.”

Nadine

I fell into my bed fully clothed. It was almost 5 AM. That gave me exactly one hour to sleep. Of course, the instant my head hit the pillow all I could see was Honeysuckle with her poor, broken tail. And James. I could see him. The way he’d looked at me, held me, kissed me. I touched my lips. I could feel him too. I lay there, dozing on and off but never falling completely asleep. My body was far too awake, almost jangling with nerves. No, not nerves. Desire. He’d lit me up somehow. Woken me. I wasn’t sure I liked it. I could feel everything. Instead of being numb and angry all the time, I was awake and hurting.

And wanting. I got up before my alarm went off, deciding to take the time to try and cover the bags under my eyes with

concealer. After about two seconds, I realized it was going to take a mountain of foundation and gave up. I didn’t like putting a lot of stuff on my face. I had very little time to get to the cafeteria so I hustled. Out of habit I reached for a can of cat food. Then I remembered. Honeysuckle. Those boys. Her tail. Outrage and worry consumed me instantly. How could someone do something like that to such a sweet, brave little creature? And then reality came crashing down on me.

Fuck me. I needed to find a new place to live and enough money to cover the veterinarian bills. They said she’d be there for a few days. That gave me time to figure things out. Not a lot but I could do it. I had to. I had no choice. The cat’s life and mine both hung in the balance.

Focus Nadine! I rushed out the door and hightailed it to campus. As I ran, my tight control over my thoughts broke loose. I’d been trying to avoid thinking about last night and everything that had happened. Or what it all meant. The rest of the night came flooding back to me, washing away everything else. James. Over tipping. Driving me home. Kissing me. The way he’d stayed with me all night at the animal hospital.

I shook my head, trying to dispel the romantic ideas that were starting to take root. I was not a silly little girl anymore. And James was definitely not a knight in shining armor! Though… he’d kind of acted like one last night hadn’t he? Acted like he cared. Like I was more than another piece of ass to him. God knows he’d had his share. What would he do when he found out about me? That I didn’t like to be touched. That I’d never let anyone touch me. Not since… I felt bile rise in my throat, pushing the thought aside. I was just exhausted, that’s all. That’s why everything felt so intense. After my shift I would go to the student center and check the housing board. Then I’d go to the library and shut my eyes for a few minutes… I worked in a daze, loading and unloading the dishwasher. The steam washed over me, wilting me like a flower. But I just kept going. What choice did I have? By the time I got to the student center I was wobbly on my feet. At least I didn’t have to work tonight. I could rest. My phone pinged. It was a text. From James. My heart leapt at the sight of it.

Want to get something to eat before class? My stomach clenched. I was hungry. Starving, really. But I needed to sit down. Maybe study. Besides, I looked like

hell. It was a very strange sensation to realize that I cared what he thought. That I wanted him to think I was pretty. Even though I didn’t really know why or what to do with that.

Studying in Avery, but thanks. See you at econ. There. That wasn’t unfriendly. I’d been accused of being overly prickly a few times. I was making an effort to soften up. A little bit anyway. I walked towards Avery Library and fell gratefully into one of the ancient, overstuffed leather chairs on the second floor. I closed my eyes, knowing I was going to fall asleep but unable to do a thing about it. The next thing I heard was a deep, familiar voice. I opened my eyes. James was standing over me. “Somebody missed class, sleepyhead.”

Chapter Seven James

Nadine blinked up at me, looking like a sleepy little girl. Suddenly, I could see her in my mind, a scrawny kid with tangled hair, always looking a little bit lost. A little bit lonely. Her eyes had been so big. They’d always looked too old for her face. Like she’d seen too much. My heart twisted in my chest. Something else twisted too. My joint. It had been a couple weeks since I had run into Deanie at the ribs place. I hadn’t gotten laid since. Plenty of opportunities to get laid or get my knob polished. Blatant offers. Phone numbers. Booty calls. I hadn’t been interested in one. I just wanted to be with her.

Damn it. I didn’t like it. She was giving me the run around while I waited for her, twiddling my fucking thumbs. Enough was

enough. I was annoyed as I hoisted her to her feet and grabbed her bag. I propelled her through the library. “What are you doing?” “I’m taking you home. And tomorrow I am taking you out.” “I have to work tomorrow.” “Forget it.” “James-“ I stopped outside the library, spinning her to face me. “Stop playing games, Deanie. I want you. You want me. This is happening.” Her mouth opened and she stared at me, looking like a sexy little fish. A guppie maybe. I growled and yanked her against me, my mouth crashing down over hers. She tasted sweet. And surprised. Her lips opened beneath mine in a little ‘o’ and I slid my tongue inside, tasting her. She tasted like ketchup and french fries. I suddenly had a newfound appreciation for fast food. I couldn’t resist sliding my hands over her back to her bottom. She let out a squeak as I grabbed her round cheeks and squeezed. I laughed and let her go. Time for that later. I opened my car door for her. “Get in.” She was still half asleep I think because she actually did what I asked without arguing. For once. I knew I shouldn’t get used to it but a guy could dream. “Oh, before I forget.”

I pulled a thumb drive out of my pocket. “Here. I took notes.” “You took notes?” She was laughing at me. “Yeah. I do that sometimes.” I gave her a mock glare and was rewarded by a melodious tinkling laugh. I liked the way that sounded. I wasn’t sure I’d actually ever heard that before. “Thank you. I’ll transcribe them. I prefer paper.” “Yeah, I noticed that.” It never occurred to me that she couldn’t afford a laptop. Not until later. I was way too concerned with my dick. I parked in front of her building and turned off the car. I turned to look at her. She was staring at me with a look of sweet surrender. For some reason, she’d finally let her guard down for me. I didn’t know where my prickly little Deanie had gone, but I didn’t care. “Nadine…” I moaned as I pulled her against me. This time I went slow, kissing her deep and hard. My hands caressed her, aching to touch her everywhere. I slid them to her front and up to her breasts. But I didn’t linger. I could tell she was still skittish. I sighed, pulling back. Her eyes were half open, languorous. ‘Bedroom eyes’ they called them. Damn if they didn’t make my dick hard as a rock. I was in a state of constant arousal with her. She was so sweet, so ready for me. I knew she was tired, but we could make it a quickie. As much as I wanted to plow her all night, I knew

she was too tired to keep up with me. And I wanted her at her best. I got out and opened her car door for her. My plan was to take her upstairs and tuck her in. With my cock. It would be hard to stop after one time but the girl needed her rest. I grinned, following her to the door like a horny puppy. She turned, looking up at me with a look of acute embarrassment. “Don’t come in.” I frowned. This was not the plan. The plan was her, my cock and a bed. Actually, fuck the bed. A chair would do nicely. A wall. The floor. I wasn’t picky. “Why? You got a boyfriend up there?” “No. No boyfriend. Just don’t, okay?” She shook her head, her eyes pleading with me. She was hiding something from me. I didn’t like it. I didn’t like it one bit.

“Fuck that.” I held her arm and marched her up the stairs. The building was decrepit. Falling down around our ears almost. I had been annoyed before but now I was fucking furious. She opened the door and I followed her into a dark hallway. It was musty and cruddy. It looked like a tenement. I

was not amused. The thought of her living here made me sick. She led me into a windowless kitchen. I looked around. This room was clean at least. Then I saw it. In the corner of the room was a twin bed. More of a cot really. A faded floral blanket lay on top. I turned to look at her. “Is that your bed?” She nodded, refusing to meet my eyes. “What the fuck?”

Nadine

“Jesus Deanie. You live here?” I knew how it must look to someone who wasn’t in my situation. I knew it looked like a hovel. But the room was spotless. Well, except for a few dishes in the sink. And empty beer bottles. Great. My fucking roommates were class acts. I shrugged, afraid to look at him. He waited for me to look up. When I did, I wished I hadn’t. James looked horrified. Shame pooled in my stomach. The old feeling was back. The feeling of not being good enough. Not deserving. “What? All I need is a bed really.” He looked at me, his gorgeous blue eyes wide. “This is…” “A lot better than the places I’ve slept since I left South Side.” He frowned, looking at me as if I was something strange

and dirty. “Don’t look at me like that. I’m fine.” “No. You’re not.” He shook his head slowly. “But you’re gonna be.” He walked over to the kitchen cabinets and started riffling through them. “What are you doing.” He turned around and threw me a garbage bag. “Pack your shit.” “What? Why?” He strode across the room, grasping my face in his hands. He wasn’t gentle. But it didn’t exactly hurt either. “Because. You. Are. Coming. With. Me.” Then he kissed me. It was hard. And fast. And it sent a spiral of desire straight to my center. He lifted his head, his eyes boring into mine. “Say yes Deanie.” I didn’t think. I just obeyed. “Yes.” He smiled then. “Good girl.” I was numb as I did as he asked, shoving all my clothes and my few personal items into the bag. James watched me impassively, his arms crossed over his broad chest. In minutes I held up the bag. It was only half full. “That’s it?” I nodded. “I got used to… traveling light.”

He frowned and jerked his head. “Let’s go.” He drove me back to campus. I didn’t ask him where we were going. I was numb and exhausted. I almost didn’t care where we went. As long as I was with him. It was crazy, but I felt safe. Even though I knew, deep down, he just wanted to sleep with me. So help me God, I wanted that too. It scared me to death though. We parked past the athletic complex and walked to a row of townhouses. He opened the door to one and flipped on the light. I stared around me in awe. His apartment was gorgeous. It looked like something out of a magazine, not college housing. Marble tile floors, sectional couch, glass coffee table and open kitchen. The kitchen was big too, with a dining table on the other side of a bar with stools. It was so… clean. He shut the door and flipped the lock behind us. Then he carried my bag up the stairs. “Wait.” He turned to look at me. “What’s wrong? You thirsty?” I shook my head. I wasn’t thirsty. I was just confused. “Is all this yours?” He looked a bit sheepish as he nodded. “It’s safe. Nobody comes in here except a maid once a week.”

“You don’t have to share it?” “Nah, it’s just me. Come on.” I followed him up the stairs in a daze. There were two bedrooms and a bath at the end of the hall. When he led me into the master bedroom I froze, suddenly apprehensive. But he just smiled and dropped my bag by the door to the en suit bathroom. Then he pulled back the covers. “Come on, baby girl.” I swallowed nervously and walked over to him. He bent down and lifted my shirt over my head. Then he knelt and undid my jeans, tugging them over my hips. I stared down at him. He looked up at me with the sexiest look on his face. He looked hungry. “Damn Nadine. You aren’t making this easy.” He shook his head, biting his lip. Then he grabbed a tshirt from a chest of drawers and lowered it over my head. He ran his knuckles over my cheek and leaned towards me. “I can’t believe I’m putting clothes back on you.” Slowly, I found myself being lowered into the bed. The covers were drawn up to my chin. A butterfly light kiss brushed my forehead. “Sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow.” I looked up at him in surprise. I’d expected him to pounce on me. I was almost sorry he didn’t. Almost against my will I felt my eyelids close. The last thing I saw was James watching me like a mother hen. Then I fell into the deepest sleep I’d had in years.

Chapter Eight James

“Focus up people!” I heard Coach Adams shout at the offense while we scrimmaged. He yelled at everyone. But I knew he was talking to me. I was distracted as hell today. How could I not be? Waking up this morning with a half naked Nadine in my bed had been… amazing. Awesome. Fucking awful. The hardest thing I’d ever done had been sliding out of that bed and into a shower. A very, very cold shower. But not before I’d kissed her bare shoulders. Or lifted the covers to take a peek. My t-shirt had ridden up, exposing her long legs and that adorable ass of hers. Damn, the girl was fine! I’d done my best not to stare when I’d put her to bed. But this morning my scruples had been… less scrupulous. To say the least.

I’d looked my fill at her body while she slept, pressing down on my jock. It had been hard enough to cut glass. Fuck, I think it could have cut through fucking steel. Now the image of her was emblazoned in my mind. Those gorgeous legs, that impossibly soft skin, all those gorgeous curves… How the fuck was I supposed to focus? All I could see was her. So yeah, I was a little distracted. Never mind the fact that I was worried as fuck about the girl. She was in a bad spot. That place she’d been living… and she’d told me about her second job. Two jobs, full load of classes, that shit hole she was living in. Her alarm had gone off so early this morning. No wonder she was exhausted. I’d slapped it off without thinking twice. Fuck her student job. My girl needed rest. I was going to keep her real fucking busy. Riding my cock. I groaned, feeling myself getting hard again. I had spent every waking moment since I met her in a state of constant arousal. But this was worse. She was naked in my bed. Right now. And I was here. What a joke. What a fucking disaster. “Yo’ Fitz, where’s your head at?” Pete was talking to me. I pulled out my mouthpiece. Practice had just ended, thank God. I’d practically sleep walked through the whole damn three hours. Kyle’s head popped over Pete’s shoulder, his goofy face wearing a shit-eating grin.

“He’s thinking about that hot little piece from the rib joint.” “Oh yeah, the one that turned him down?” “Shut up.” I was in no mood to be ribbed about Nadine. Especially, considering the state of my hard on. I just wanted to get home and take care of it. Once and for all. “Let’s go for some lappies. That’ll fix you right up.” Kyle was always down for lap dances. Pete too. Hell, once I had been that guy. But no more. “No man, I can’t. Plans.” “Plans, eh?” “Well, whoever she is, I hope she gets your head back in the game.” I nodded curtly. I wasn’t going to dish about Nadine. She was different. She was mine.

Nadine

Take the day off. I’ll be back for dinner. -J P.S. That’s an order. I chewed my lip, staring at the note in my hand. It was after ten. I’d already missed my shift and the start of my first class. It seemed somehow extravagant to just lay around in bed. Foreign. Wrong. But when I saw his bathroom, I reconsidered. It was clean. Spotless even. And there was a massive soaking tub. To hell with it. I ran the tub while I brewed a pot of coffee and called the vet. They needed to keep Honeysuckle a few more days. I

asked what the bill was going to come to and my stomach dropped. That was just so far. Eight hundred freaking dollars. And counting. I thanked the vet and hung up. I brought my coffee into the bathroom and stripped. Then I sank into the water with a deep sigh. I lay there, sipping my coffee, refreshing the water a few times to keep it hot. Weighing my options. I didn’t have many. I could sell a kidney. Or my eggs. Or I could strip. The thought of that made my stomach turn. But I knew I could pay off Honeysuckle’s bills in one night. I shook my head. No. That was a last ditch option. Not that I looked down on it as a profession. I knew a couple girls who did it. One of Lana’s friends who came by BB Smith’s after her shift. Barbara. AKA Babs. She always had a lot of money. Babs was married too. Her husband didn’t seem to mind all those guys looking at her. I didn’t even have a boyfriend to worry about, let alone a husband. But that was the problem. I just didn’t really like it when men looked at me. Like that. So, yeah. That was definitely a last resort. I knew they’d hire me though. Babs had mentioned it more than once, saying I would rake it in if I ever wanted to give it a try. Lana

and I just laughed. I might have the body for it, but I definitely did not have the personality. I wouldn’t know how to flirt if my life depended on it. Which, at the moment, it kind of did. I riffled through my bag for clean clothes and got dressed. I knew what would go down if I stayed. James had certain expectations of what would happen if I was here when he came back. I did my best not to over think it. But I didn’t leave either. I walked around the house, sipping my second cup of coffee. The kitchen was stocked. The house was clean. It was almost as if a maid service came and took care of the place for him once or twice a week. I stopped in my tracks. Of course it did. He’d said that last night. I shook my head. It was hard to believe how far he’d come since South Side. And I knew he was going to rise even higher. I had known of course that the University gave perks to its star athletes. I just hadn’t realized the extent of those perks. Right now I was standing in the middle of what was probably the biggest perk of all. It was decorated expensively, with tastefully masculine pieces of furniture. Big furniture. A couch that I could sleep on easily. With three friends. Not that I had a lot of friends. But Fritz did. I turned the television on and flipped through the channels. Then I turned it off again. I’d had so little time or

exposure to TV since I left home that it was hard to get into it. It felt too weird just to sit there, staring blindly into that little box. Okay, it was a big box. Almost like a private movie theater. I walked over to it, examining the back. It was paper-thin. I shook my head. I was out of my element. Way, way out of my element. I sat at the dining room table and started doodling on the back of a magazine. I didn’t notice time pass. When I reached for my coffee, it was cold. I didn’t hear the key in the lock. I didn’t hear the door open. All I knew was that suddenly James was there, pulling me into his arms. He kissed me deeply, holding me like I was made of glass. Like I was precious. Like I might break. Little did he know how right he was. I was out of breath by the time he lifted his head. “Hey.” I blushed, trying to act normal. But the way he was looking at me was sending crazy tingles shooting through my body. My heart was beating like a drum. My mind was utterly blank. “Hi.” “You hungry?” “What?” He laughed at me. He knew exactly what he was doing to me. How distracted I was. Then I looked down and saw

that he had set a massive take out bag on the table. “Oh.” I smiled at him, relieved that I had a break from his sensual onslaught. I knew that once he started in on me again, I wouldn’t be able to stop him. I wouldn’t want to. “Yes, I am.” He grinned at me, pressing a quick kiss to my forehead. He stepped back and it was like a huge wall of heat and comfort had disappeared. Then he pulled his shirt over his head and my mouth went dry. “I just want to rinse off.” He was staring at me expectantly. But I could not think. I could just take it in. James was beautiful.

Heartbreakingly beautiful. From his gorgeous face, all the way down to his waist. Chiseled muscles, hard, flat stomach, a broad chest and the thickest shoulders and arms I had ever seen. His skin looked soft and… um… tasty. I wanted to lick it. Jesus, what was getting into me? I swallowed and nodded. “Yeah, uh… cool.” He was grinning at me like the cat that ate the canary. He fucking knew that he was gorgeous. Perfect even. And he knew that I thought so too. I lifted my chin and acted like he wasn’t standing there half naked, looking like an Adonis. “I’ll just find some plates.” “They’re in the kitchen.”

I scowled at him and he laughed, slowly walking up the stairs. He was staring at me, a hot look of promise in his eyes. I was frozen in place. The moment he was out of view I sagged, leaning against a chair. I wasn’t sure if I could go through with this after all. He was making it easy for me. Too easy. But still, I knew the old fears would come creeping in. I knew I might close my eyes and see someone else above me.

Damn it, I just want to be a normal girl for one damn night! Lana was covering my shift so I knew I could just relax and go with it. I knew that any other girl on campus would give anything to be me right now. I exhaled loudly and went to set the table. Fuck it, what did I have to lose? Except everything really.

Chapter Nine James

Nadine was picking at her food, not looking at me. Of course, I’d caught her sneaking glances at my chest. I suppressed a grin. I knew she liked looking at me. That’s why I hadn’t bothered to put a shirt on after my quick shower. We ate quickly, or I did. I wanted to get to the main event. She on the other hand… she was stretching it out. I watched her eat another tiny bite of her salad. She’d told me she was a vegetarian. I’d joke that next time I wouldn’t order steak. I’d teased her about a vegetarian working in a rib joint. She’d smiled but it hadn’t reached her eyes. Now she was dragging out her dinner in an obvious attempt to avoid what was coming next. Me. Her.

Naked time. I just couldn’t figure out why.

“Nadine.” She looked up at me, looking like a deer in headlights. An adorable, sexy, about to get pounced on deer. I smiled, trying to look reassuring. My cock was already hard. It was a good thing she couldn’t see it under the table. “Are you finished?” “Oh.” She nodded, as if she hadn’t realized what she was doing. “Yes, I am. Sorry, I was just… thinking.” “It’s okay. I’ll just clean up.” “No! I’ll do it!” She practically jack rabbited out of her seat, grabbing plates and hauling them to the kitchen. I followed her, bringing our empty glasses of wine. Maybe if she had a little bit more of it, she would relax. The girl was acting like a virgin for fuck’s sake. Not a nineteen-year-old girl from South Side. Nobody got out of that part of town without lots of experience. Especially, a girl who looked like her. I felt a split second of jealousy at the thought before I squashed it. I didn’t really care how many guys she’d been with. As long as she was with me now. She scraped the dishes into the trash and went to the sink. She grabbed a sponge and turned on the hot water. I stepped behind her, turning the faucet off. “Nadine.” She turned and I leaned forward, boxing her against the counter with both arms. My cock surged forward, wanting to

get closer to her. I tilted my head, my eyes on her gorgeous lips. “The dishes can wait.” I moaned as our mouths connected. It was hard to believe how good it felt. Just kissing her. It was like a fucking fireworks show in my synapses. I couldn’t wait to find out what the real deal was going to be like. She sighed against my lips and I reminded myself to take my time, really enjoy this. Once we’d done it once we could bang it out just for kicks. Whenever we wanted to. As much as possible. But the first time should be special. All the same, I was eager to get her clothes off her. Right fucking now. Ten minutes ago. I moved my lips to her ear, kissing my way down to her neck. She gasped a little as I slid her tank top over her shoulders. I pushed it down and groaned at the sight of her. Her pretty white bra showed off her gorgeous tits to perfection. They looked huge on her tiny frame. I could see her waist and the gentle swell of her hips. I grabbed her waist, yanking her against me. I wasted no time, lifting one thigh and wrapping in around me as I kissed her soft lips. My hands slid over her body freely, touching and exploring. I tugged her bra cups down. Her tits were so pretty. Perfect, really. The best I’d ever seen. Full and round with hard little tips. I kissed them, rolling my tongue against the

hard little nubs while she moaned. Her fingers slid through my hair, tugging gently. The soft little sounds she was making were driving me insane. It was hot as fucking hell. But I wanted more. I wanted her jeans off, her panties off and her sweet little box wrapped around my cock. Immediately. Still, I probably shouldn’t fuck her in the kitchen. I growled and stood up, lifting her into my arms. Her face was flushed and soft looking, like she’d been sleeping. But I knew, neither of us were getting a wink of sleep tonight. The way my cock felt, I was going to ride her ‘till dawn. I had a crazy feeling that I’d still be ready for more. I was in the mood for twenty-four hour fuck-a-thon. I carried her up the stairs to my bedroom and kicked open the door. Then I gently lowered her down, and crawled on top of her. I kissed her, pulling her bra off completely. Our chests mashed together and we both groaned at the contact. I was rocking my hips into hers, hoping I wouldn’t fucking spray my load in my pants like a teenager. I didn’t care thought. I couldn’t stop. I reached for her jeans, unbuttoning them and pulling them down. Her panties were next. Then my fingers found her sex, slipping inside her. She was slick, soft and so tight. She whimpered as I played with her folds, pressing my index finger inside her. Hot, wet silk enfolded me and I felt my cock jerk.

Fuck waiting. I reached for my jeans and had them undone and halfway down my hips before I heard her. She was fucking hyperventilating. Breathing fast and hard. Totally freaked out. “Nadine?” Her eyes were wild as she stared at me. She held one of my pillows in front of her, like she was hiding herself. Protecting herself. What the fuck? “Sweetie, what’s wrong?” “Don’t touch me.” I held my hands up. My jeans were open, but I had yet to pull my cock out. “Okay.” She shimmied across the bed, grabbing her clothes. I watched as the most desirable woman I’d ever had in my bed literally ran away from me. I felt her slipping away from me, feeling completely unsure what to do. I followed her, watching as she pulled her clothes on by the front door. “Nadine, did I do something?” “No. It’s not you.” I crossed the room, trying to pull her against me. “Don’t!’ I stepped back again. “Tell me what’s wrong. Let me fix it.” She shook her head, her hair tumbling everywhere. Even now, she looked so beautiful it took my breath away. And

she was leaving. She opened the door and I stopped her, slamming it shut with my hand. I leaned against it, backing her against the door. “Nadine. Tell me there isn’t something going on between us.” She stared up at me. Her eyes were so revealing. I could see the turmoil she was in. Then a shutter closed. Just like that. She was gone. “There isn’t.” I stepped back. What the fuck could I say to that? She was lying to me. Probably lying to herself too. She finished dressing and grabbed her backpack and her garbage bag of clothes. It had been right by the door. Almost as if she’d been expecting this. “Just leave me alone. Don’t come to my work. Pretend we never met.” I stared at her, feeling like I was getting ripped in two. “Why?” She finally looked at me. Her beautiful green eyes were filled with so much pain I reached out for her again. She flinched. She actually flinched. “Just- take care of yourself James.” And then she was gone.

Nadine

Right, left, right, left, right, left. I counted my steps, mindlessly moving forward. I stumbled a little and then started running again. What was wrong with me? What did I just do? I’d fucked everything up again, that’s what. I was running through campus, tears streaming down my face. Thankfully it was dark. But still, I was attracting stares. I didn’t care though. It didn’t matter what people thought of me. I knew the truth. I was a freak. It was late but no one bothered me as I walked briskly through the shady part of town where I lived. I got to my building and used my keys to get in. I heaved a sigh of relief. I’d been afraid they would have changed the locks already. Once they’d seen my stuff gone. Then again, maybe they didn’t even notice. That’s how fucking invisible I was. I didn’t count. I barely existed.

I was fucking tired of it. I’d mattered to James. He’d wanted me. Badly. Maybe it was just about sex but I’d mattered. And now I’d ruined it. I sat on my bed, shocked by how much I missed him. It wasn’t just his touch. The way he’d made me feel. I missed the possibility of him. What could have been. I missed the future. I pulled out my wallet, flipping through the bills. I didn’t have a bank account. I didn’t even have a social security card. Or a credit card. But I had money. Six hundred bucks. I needed four for this month’s rent. That left two hundred. That wasn’t enough to pay for the cat, never mind a down payment on a new place. Never mind food. I could eat at work. I’d done it before, going hungry all day until my shift started at happy hour. Casey liked me. He’d feed me if he knew I needed it. But that only solved one small sliver of my big ass problem. I pulled out my phone, ignoring the texts from James. There were a lot. All from the past hour. I could read them later, and cry. Right now I needed to look up the one phone number that could help me. The one that could change everything. The Pussycat Lounge.

Chapter Ten James

The crowd roared as I hurtled over the competition, rolling with the ball clutched against my belly. I was on my feet and running before anyone could catch me. Touchdown, motherfuckers. Too bad the other team was making it so easy for me. I wanted to break shit. Bones. Balls. Records. It had been seventy-two hours since Nadine walked out on me. Seventy-two hours since I’d stood there, at my door, watching her leave. Seventy-two hours of texting, calling and waiting for the awful feeling to go away. Well, it hadn’t. Neither had the raging hard-on she’d left me with. I’d never been that turned on in my life. To say her reaction had been a bucket of cold water was an understatement. It felt like a fucking glacier landed on my chest. I’d never been dumped. And that was definitely what she’d done to me. Even though I could have sworn she was digging me. A lot.

I was also worried about the girl. Really worried. And pissed off. Fuck all that noise. I’d stayed away the way she asked me to. But that was over starting tonight. I knew she was scared. Well, so was I. I’d never let a girl have this much power over me before. Not even close. But so fucking what? I wasn’t fucking around anymore. I was going to get my woman. As soon as I finished crushing the opposition. I ran onto the field to make another play. It was the fourth quarter. The other team looked like they’d lost already. They were right. The coach and my teammates were thrilled at the way I was playing tonight. The truth was, I just wanted the fucking game to be over. So I could find her. And take her home with me. That was just the beginning. I had plans. I have very specific plans. This time I wouldn’t let her run away. I’d make her stay and tell me what was wrong. I’d make her want me as much as I wanted her. I had to. I didn’t know how to lose. It wasn’t even in my vocabulary. I had to win.

Nadine

I stared at myself in the mirror. Red lips and enough black eyeliner to make me look like a stranger to myself. I almost looked punk. It suited my mood. Not that anyone would be able to tell. The fluorescent lights were harsh backstage. Which was ironic, considering how low the light were out front. Except the lights on the stage of course. I sighed, trying to pull down the micro mini-skirt that was part of my uniform. They’d even given me thigh-high stockings. The heels, I’d had to buy. Thank God Payless had stripper shoes. Not that I was dancing. I hadn’t been able to bring myself to sign up for that. But I was waiting tables. I’d cut my hours at BB Smith’s back to three days a week in order to work here four nights. I signed up for every shift they offered me. I had to. It still might not be enough money. This was a last ditch effort to save my ass. And Honeysuckle’s too. I hoped the damn cat appreciated it. I smiled, thinking how cute she’d looked when I went to

the vet’s to visit her earlier. Her tail had been in a cast. She meowed so sweetly when she saw me. I’d spent an hour with her, telling her my plans. She’d get a cat bed by a window and all the food she could eat. Honeysuckle was still not ready to travel. The bill was up over twelve-hundred bucks now. It was crazy, but I didn’t care. They’d saved her life. I was going to find a way to pay that bill. I really didn’t have a choice in the matter. I tottered out of the dressing room. The heels were hellish to walk in. Plus, the way they made my ass and tits jut out was basically pornographic. That was the whole point, I guess.

This better be fucking worth it. It was so dark in the lounge area that I had to wait for my eyes to adjust. There were naked women everywhere. Well, almost naked. They wore little sheer robes over their gstrings and pasties. They all looked gorgeous. The cocktail waitresses too. Much prettier than me I thought. I sighed. I wasn’t going to flirt for tips. My assets were just going to have to be enough. The manager had assured me they would be. He’d mentioned something about that ‘new girl smell.’ I think he was trying to be funny. It didn’t work. I picked up a tray and headed for my first table. I squinted as I got closer and saw a group of middle aged guys. They asked for drinks and didn’t bother me. Their eyes were on the stage.

Okay. Maybe this wouldn’t be too bad. I served drinks as the evening progressed, pocketing tip after tip. It was way more than I made in one shift at BB Smith’s, and it wasn’t even ten o’clock yet. But it still wasn’t enough to pay for a deposit or the vet bill. I still had two days to get the cat. I had time. I could do this. I picked up another round of drinks and carried them across the room.

Chapter Eleven James

I downed my fifth shot of whiskey. I was sitting where I usually sat. In Nadine’s section. But she was nowhere to be fucking found. My waitress came over, the chatty blond who always made eyes at me. “Where’s Nadine?” “I told you. She got another job.” “Where?” The waitress tilted her head, staring at me. “Like I said, I’m not telling you. It’s against our policy. Why do you want to know so bad anyway?” “We’re friends.” “You? I don’t think so.” I waved a hundred-dollar bill in her face. She snatched it out of my fingers and put it in her cleavage. “Thanks, but I don’t rat out my friends.” I slumped in my seat. My drinks were free. The whole town was celebrating our win. But the blond girl refused to

be bribed. At least people were leaving me alone now. When I first sat down, I’d be inundated with a steady stream of well wishers. I’d put on the most unfriendly face I could to discourage them while I pounded booze. So far, it was working. Probably because I looked mean as hell. I felt mean. I felt really, really pissed off. At myself. At Nadine. At whatever had spooked her so bad. My phone beeped and I picked it up. It was Kyle. My heart started pounding ferociously in my chest. Four little words and my world imploded.

Your girl is here I knew where ‘here’ was. He was at the club. But what the fuck was Nadine doing in a strip club? And why the fuck wasn’t she texting me back? She hadn’t been at class either. I only went long enough to see if she was there. I couldn’t sit there and listen. Not when I knew she was skipping class to avoid me. I stood up and tossed some more money on the table. Then I tossed some more. If the girl was friends with Nadine, it couldn’t hurt to be on her good side. Outside there were a few cabs waiting. I hopped in one and told the driver where to go. The place I’d sworn off just a month earlier. The fucking Pussycat Lounge.

Nadine

So far, this gig wasn’t too bad. I was making great tips. No one had tried to touch me or grab me. And if they were ogling me, I was too busy trying to stay upright to notice. Really, the worst part of the job was the shoes. I smiled half-heartedly at a group of college guys and handed out their twelve- dollar beers. One of them tried to chat me up but I just shook my head and said I had other tables. It was strange, but the guys here were more polite than the late night crowd at BB Smith’s. Probably because the drinks cost four times as much. That made it much more expensive to get well and truly loaded. I glanced at the door. It probably also had something to do with the massive bouncer stationed there. His nickname was The Cleaver. The name alone didn’t really inspire warm and fuzzy feelings. He was like a statue, well over six feet tall. Solid muscle. And he never smiled.

I went back to the bar to fill another order. I couldn’t believe people paid these prices for watered down drinks but they did. It was almost laughable. Men. So obsessed with their wieners. And boobs. Mostly it was the boobs. The manager waved me over. “What’s up?” “You’re doing great doll. We even got a request for you in the champagne room.” “What, they need drinks?” “No sweetheart, the guy wants you.” I narrowed my eyes. What the fuck was this? Was he trying to get over on me? “I don’t do lap dances.” “Yeah, well. You just got promoted.” “I said-“ The manager held out a wad of bills. Hundreds. More than a few. “The guy paid five hundred bucks. It’s twenty minutes of your life, hon.” I stared at the money. It would go a long way towards finding a new place and the vet bill. A long, long way. I cursed. Then I reached for it, a sick feeling in my stomach. I didn’t want to do this. I had to. “Uh uh uh. House takes a hundy.” He peeled off one of the hundreds and handed me the rest. Then he handed me a champagne bucket and two glasses. “Should I change?” “No time. He was very insistent.”

I shrugged and tottered off towards the champagne room. I figured this was like a giant band-aid. I better just rip it off and get it over with. No one had to know. It was just this one time… Of course, I really had very little clue about what I was going to do once I got in there. I walked into the champagne room and froze. James was sitting on the couch, staring at me. He did not look happy. No, not happy at all. He looked mad. And hungry. His eyes raked over my body. Down to my feet and back up again. I shivered, suddenly feeling the blast of the air conditioner. That’s all it was. The AC. Right? “What are you doing here?” “Getting a lap dance.” I felt lightheaded suddenly. And furious. He was making fun of me! Throwing his money around and making me feel small! “This isn’t funny James.” He leaned back, stretching his arms over the back of the couch. His thick thighs spread. The invitation was clear. “I’m not joking.” I walked towards him, fury radiating through my body. He was mocking me. Humiliating me. He thought he was going to get what he was after.

Fuck that.

I slammed the champagne bucket down and tossed his money in his face. “Go to hell James.” I turned to leave but he was faster. I felt his hands on me, spinning me to face him. His face was hard as he pulled me back to the couch and onto his lap. I squirmed, trying to get away but he just laughed. Finally I stopped, realizing how much he was enjoying this. His cock was hard, burning a hole into me through our clothes. I tried to catch my breath but he didn’t let me. He slid my thighs open and arranged me on his lap. Then he started to grind into me to the beat of the music. “You’re not supposed to touch me!” He smiled. It was not a friendly smile. “Those rules do not apply to me.” “Oh, so I guess you’ve been back here before.” He shook his head slowly. “Not since I met you.” “You met me when you were five years old!” He grinned then, and I could see the old James for a split second. The not-so-angry-at-me-he-was-about-tohumilate-me James. And then it was gone. “Good point. Let’s get on with it.” He held my hips, working me on his lap. It felt obscene. Wrong. And so good it made me feel all warm and fuzzy around the edges. With each thrust he was applying pressure to the perfect spot between my legs. Heat was

beginning to pool in my stomach. And lower. Like I needed reminding of how good he was at sex. He was a pro. How could I forget?

Damn it! “I can’t. This whole thing was a mistake.” “Fuck yeah, it was a mistake. But I don’t care.” He yanked me against him so my tits mashed into his chest. “This is what you were going to do with a stranger, Nadine?” “You are going to get me fired!” He stared at me, his eyes cold as ice. “Good. You’re too good for this place.” “Let me go!”

“I can’t.” He stopped gripping me as his hands found my face. His lips crashed down on mine and I gasped at the sensation. Everything he was doing to me, every circle of his hips… it was turning me on despite myself. I hated him for it. I hated me too. But I kissed him back anyway. He tasted like whiskey. I realized he was drunk. I tore my lips away and looked at him, really looked at him. He was out of breath, staring at me with a raw need that took my breath away. He wasn’t trying to hurt me. He couldn’t help himself. “James…”

He groaned, his hands desperately trying to push my uniform away so he could get to my body. To me. Pleasure spiked through me as he gave up, fondling me through the thin fabric that covered my bra. His hands were hoisting my skirt, settling me onto his cock. He’d undone his pants and his dick was out. Now there was only the thin fabric of my panties between me and his enormous cock. His hands gripped me, pumping his hips into me. I let my head fall back, mindlessly circling my hips into him. “Hey, new girl. You’re time is up.” I glanced over my shoulder at the bouncer. I realized we’d been on the brink of fucking. In public. Hot shame sliced through me. I was no better than a prostitute. I leapt up, smoothing my skirt down and turning away. But James was faster. “I need to get back to work.” “Oh, no you don’t!” I felt myself being lifted like a sack of potatoes and tossed over his shoulder. He used one arm to hold me in place and smacked my ass with the other hand. I slapped his back and told him to put me down but he just laughed. “I’ll put you down soon enough.” He carried me outside to the street. People were staring at us. My ass was in the air, barely covered by my uniform. But there was nothing I could do about it at the moment. With one hand he pulled open the door to a cab, finally

lowering me to my feet. “Get in.” I stared at him, knowing I would regret this. But I didn’t really have a choice. I couldn’t say no to him. My body wasn’t letting me. I got into the cab. He climbed in after me. He leaned across me. I closed my eyes, thinking he was going to kiss me. Instead, he put my seatbelt on. He was grinning at me, knowing what I’d been thinking. My cheeks grew red hot as he whispered in my ear. “Safety first.”

Chapter Twelve James

The cab dropped us off at my place and I gripped her arm, pulling her to the front door. I didn’t let her go until we were inside with the door locked behind us. I wasn’t going to give her a chance to get away this time. Not until I had some answers. And satisfaction. Whichever came first. I stared at Nadine as she stood by the sofa, looking like she wanted to hide. I didn’t blame her. I strode forward, pulling her into my arms. I kissed her hard. Taking what I wanted. Not giving. Not now. I’d already tried the nice approach. I was too angry with her to be sweet. And I wanted her too bad. My hands roamed over her body freely, grabbing her hips and ass, squeezing her breasts. She’d put herself up for sale. That one thought kept running through my head. Well, if she was for sale, I was buying.

“I want you.” She stared at me, her big eyes blinking. It wasn’t a question. It wasn’t a request. It was a fucking demand. “Now.” I bent down to lift her into my arms. She stepped back, shaking her head. “Wait-“ I stared at her, my breathing labored. “What the fuck is it now, Nadine?” She swallowed, her delicate throat working. I wanted to kiss it. Fuck that. I wanted to bite it. “I think once we start this it’s going to be hard to stop.” I stepped closer. “Damn fucking right.” “I just-“ “Stop playing with me.” “I’m not!” I growled at her and lifted her over my shoulders, taking the stairs two at a time. Enough was enough. I tossed her on the bed, smirking at the surprised look on her face as she bounced from the impact. I pulled my shirt over my head and kicked my shoes off. “Take your clothes off.” “Fitz-“ “I swear to you Nadine, you do not want to make me

angry.” Her face paled and I cursed. I pulled her into my arms, my hand smoothing over her back. “I’m not going to hurt you Nadine. Jesus!” “I know. It’s just…” I leaned back, looking down at her beautiful face. She wouldn’t meet my eyes. “What is it?” “I’m a virgin.” My hand stilled. My mind went blank. I held my breath Fuck, it felt like time fucking stopped. “Are you serious?” She nodded, burying her face in my chest. I grinned. I felt like I’d just won the lottery. “Okay. So we can go slow.” She peeked up at me, her gorgeous eyes glistening. She looked relieved. Like I’d been about to pounce on her and devour her. Actually, that sounded about right. “Just not that slow.” Her mouth opened in surprise. She almost laughed. Good. That was good. “Lay back.” She blushed then and did as I asked. I lay beside her and pulled her against me. Slowly, I arranged our bodies so we were as close as possible. I lifted her leg and draped it over my hip. Unf. Fuck, if my dick didn’t leap for joy in my pants. And yeah, we were still both dressed. Mostly, anyway. I moaned. This was going to be hell. But I knew that the

reward was going to be worth it. It was going to be heaven. And I was going to be the first. I started kissing her, trying to go slowly. My hands were gentle as they explored her body. But in minutes things were picking up speed. Rapidly coming to a boil. Our tongues tangled frantically as I rolled her to her back. Now I was wedged between her thighs. Right where I wanted to be. I started laying the groundwork for getting her clothes off of her. A button here, a zipper there, moving gently so not to startle her. My girl was wound up as tightly as a spring.

My girl. Fuck, if I didn’t like the sound of that. After about twenty minutes I had her uniform open at the top, and the micro mini-skirt was practically up to her waist. I traced the edge of her panties with my fingertips, staring down at her. Her eyes were glazed over with lust.

Fucking A. I pulled her uniform over her shoulders, then tugged it down over her feet. I casually unbuttoned my jeans as I worked my way up her body, kissing her softly. I avoided her panties completely. I wanted her begging for it by the time I got to that. I was finally getting what I wanted. I could see her, touch her, taste her at will. She was so beautifully put together that

it was doing crazy things to my head. She was a miracle. A fucking masterpiece. Nadine whimpered softly as I tugged her bra down, my lips on her ear. Her gorgeous round breasts spilled out of her bra and I groaned, my hands reaching for them instinctively. In seconds I was kissing them, my tongue whisking against her nipples until they stood up firmly in my mouth. “Hmmm… so sweet…” I lifted my head, realizing that she was squirming beneath me. My hands found her panties, toying with her softly through the thin fabric. She gasped and wiggled even more. I watched her, loving the look of desire on her face. “James…” I grinned, licking my lips. Then I slid my fingers under the edge of her panties to the soft, slippery folds below. I toyed with her, teasingly brushing her clit and then returning to the edge of her pussy lips. We were both panting for breath. I realized I had to taste her. Now. Fuck this. I was done going slow. I sat up and pulled her panties down. Nadine gasped as I pulled her thighs apart and slid my shoulders under them. Then I went to town. Her beautiful little pussy was soft and puffy looking. So pink… I let my tongue trace the exterior again and again. Then I dove forward, plunging my tongue into her tight little box.

“Hmmmffff…” Her hands were in my hair as I used my tongue to ease open her pussy. I knew it was going to hurt when I took her. I was well above average, even for a guy my size. And she was so tiny… so sweet… so perfect… So fucking tight. I had to make her cum first. Maybe twice. I shifted up, my tongue finding her clit and flicking against it rapidly. I used my fingers to penetrate her, starting with one and then adding another. Jesus! Even that was a tight fit! I felt her sugar walls start to undulate on my fingers and picked up the pace. In seconds, she was thrashing on the bed, her fingers tugging my hair. I grinned and kept going, making sure she came as hard as possible. I wanted to milk this for all it was worth. She was still shivering when I lifted my head. I kissed her inner thigh and her body jerked. I knew the time was right. She was so sensitive that when I leaned up and kissed her nipple, she almost flew off the bed. I rolled to the bedside table, kicking off my jeans and reaching for a condom. I was wrapped and ready and back across the bed before she could start shivering. Or having second thoughts. I pulled her into my arms, my cock jerking at the feel of her against me. “Nadine…” “Yes.”

“I can’t wait any longer.” She shook her head. “Okay.” Her softly spoken permission sent a surge of lust through me. I hadn’t thought it was possible to be this turned on. And she’d just dialed it up even further. Just by being her. I hadn’t felt like this before. Sex had become mechanical for me. Just something to do to get my rocks off. But with her it was different. It was not even in the same ballpark. Fuck, it wasn’t on the same damn planet. I positioned myself above her, holding the tip of my cock against her puffy little lips. Gently, I eased forward until I was a few inches in. She was stretched around me, feeling even tighter than I had imagined. Her eyes were wide when I looked down at her. I eased back and nudged forward, inch by inch. It felt so good that it almost hurt. The way she was hugging my cock made me feel something I’d never felt before. Something… deep. “Unfff…” I looked down, realizing I was barely halfway in. I pushed a little harder, feeling something inside her give way. Then I was in, up to my balls.

Holy fucking hell. I was in paradise. I was finally in and I never wanted to leave. Nadine looked surprised. I didn’t blame her. I was surprised as hell myself.

“Nadine… I have to-“ She nodded shakily. “Don’t stop.” I began to move.

Nadine

James held himself above me, his weight on his massive arms. He was straining with the effort of keeping his body up, of holding back. I could see it in the tense look on his face. The sexy grunting sounds he was making were driving me crazy. He was like an animal. I was too. And I loved it. It was hard to believe I’d been so afraid. He’d been gentle. At first. Now he was… not. He knew just what my body wanted, when it wanted it. It was perfect. He was perfect. I felt my body start to rise as I peaked again. I shuddered around his massive cock as it pistoned in and out of me with increasing tempo. He froze and I felt his cock expand. It seemed hard to believe it could get any larger but it did. Then it pulsed, sending another orgasm rocking through my body.

I thought James would stop then but he didn’t. He drove forward again and again. My body did not stop shaking until he’d finally stilled, his forehead resting on mine. He’d kissed me softly before pulling ou. It was strange, but I felt empty without him inside me. He did something with the condom and went into the bathroom. I heard the water run. He came back with a warm washcloth. He pressed it against me and I winced. “Better?” I nodded. I didn’t quite trust my voice yet. For so long I’d refused to even think about letting a boy in. Letting anyone in. I’d been on my own and I’d liked it that way. But now everything had changed. He smiled at me and took the cloth back to the bathroom. Then he pulled on a pair of track pants and stared down at me. “Do you want something to drink? Water?” I nodded, smiling at him. He’d taken such care with me… I knew this was more than just sex. I smiled at the ceiling after he’d gone. I felt so good. So protected. So loved. I rolled to the side and froze. His bedside table had a deep drawer. The drawer was open. The drawer was full of condoms. Lots and lots of condoms. It looked like hundreds of them. Lube too. It sunk in slowly. He had hundreds of condoms.

Because he had sex with a lot of girls. I’d just given my Vcard to the biggest man whore in the state. The country maybe. My heart started to beat double time in my chest. “Nadine? What’s wrong sweetheart?” I sat up, pulling the sheets up to cover myself. He looked concerned, holding the glass of water in front of me. Hell, he looked more than concerned. He looked very, very worried. Good. He fucking should be. This candy shop was about to close. Permanently. “What is it?” “Your stash. Real classy, James.” His jaw dropped. “Jesus Fitz, how many condoms do you need?” He shrugged. I stood up, dragging the sheet off the bed with me. “They send me a case every now and then. All the guys get them.” “A case?” I looked in the drawer. There were a lot of condoms, but it wasn’t a case. “You must have used an awful lot of them.” “Nadine-“ He reached for me but I stepped back. I didn’t want him touching me. No wonder he knew exactly how to turn me on. I was an idiot and he was a total slut. I felt sick to my stomach.

“How many?” He shrugged again. “I’m no saint. But I haven’t been with anyone since you.” “What, since five minutes ago? What a fucking hardship for you.” “No- since the night I saw you at BB Smiths.” That was a little more than a month ago. I laughed. He was actually proud of himself for not fucking anyone for a full month! “Congratulations on your phenomenal will power!” I reached for my clothes but he spun me, holding my shoulders. “Nadine. I have not been with anyone else and I do not plan to be with anyone else. Not if we are together.” “Together? That’s a joke. I’m glad you got that out of your system. You nailed the stupid girl from South Side. Her first time too! You must be so proud.” He stared at me, taken aback by my harsh words. “Now I would like you to let me go.” His eyes were wide as I grabbed my clothes. I got dressed in the hallway, half expecting him to follow me out. Almost hoping he would. But he didn’t. The sun was just starting to paint the sky as I walked out of his townhouse. Out of his life. I brushed my hand over my cheeks. They were wet. He’d done it. He made me cry after all these years. If anything, it made me even angrier.

I didn’t want to cry over a man like him. I didn’t want to cry over anyone.

Chapter Thirteen James

God damn it! I stared at the drawer full of condoms. This is what was going to ruin things for us? My collection of unused prophylactics? I was pissed. Nadine knew what kind of guy I was. Or had been. What did she fucking expect? I told her I would change for her. It wasn’t even a question. I had changed. But this was bullshit. She’d just taken away what I wanted more than anything in the world.

Her. I felt my insides twist. Fuck this. I ran out into the street. It was just past dawn. I’d been planning on keeping her up with me, then making her breakfast.

After I took her once or twice more. Fuck, even now I could still feel her sweetness on my cock. I took off down the street. I could see her about a block away. “NADINE!” She looked at me over her shoulder and took off at a run. But I’d seen it. She was crying. I stood there, suddenly feeling like the lowest life form on Earth. She’d given me her virginity and I’d fucked it all up. I walked back home, deciding that I would make it up to her. I would get her back. I had too. For whatever reason, she’d got her hooks into me. And I didn’t see a way to get them out. I wasn’t sure I wanted to either. Besides, I wasn’t a quitter. It wasn’t in my nature. Coach hadn’t trained me that way either. Not back in high school and not now. They’d encouraged me. Trained me. Molded me into the man I was today. It wasn’t just physical either. Mentally, I’d been trained to see obstacles in the distance and overcome them. No matter how fucking insurmountable they were. Too bad I hadn’t seen her coming. Never in a million years would I have thought I would fall in love with the skinny little girl from South Side.

Love. Fuck me. But there it was. I was going to use that training now. To get what I wanted. I had a half-day of classes before practice but I could cut class. The team had tutors to bring me notes anyway. I had shit to do. I knew the one thing I could do that would bring Nadine right back to my doorstep. I picked up the phone, grinning. This was going to be good.

Nadine

“Hi, I was interested in the room. I was wondering if you allowed pets?” The answer was always the same. No. Sorry. Best of luck. I hung up, chewing my lip. I crossed out yet another number on my list. I’d long since given up on living near campus, or anything reasonably priced. Now I was calling every single place in the paper. Every number on the student housing board. The fact remained. I was fucked. I was supposed to pick up Honeysuckle today.

God damn it. Maybe if I asked them, they could keep her another day or two? But that would only cost more. Plus, I didn’t want to leave her there longer than necessary. It wasn’t exactly a cheerful place. I wanted to take the best care of her that I could. Who was I kidding? I could barely take care of myself. I had no backup. No one to help me.

I was all alone. I’d always been alone. And I always would be. I felt the familiar squeeze in my tummy. I was thinking about James again. If only he wasn’t such a player… it had felt almost real when he’d held me in his arms. Almost like he cared about me. But he just cared about himself. And his cock. His beautiful, perfect cock. I sighed, resting my head on my hands. I had midterms coming up soon. I had already lost my new job thanks to James. All I had were a couple of shifts at the rib joint. Like I said, I was fucked. Everything was going to hell in a hand basket. Oh well, nothing to do but face it. I counted my money again, leaving most of it in an envelope under my mattress. I could only hope they took installment plans. I grabbed a cardboard box for Honeysuckle from the recycling outside and took the bus across town. I was a bundle of nerves the whole way. I paced outside, trying to figure out something to say that would convince them to help me. Finally, I took a deep breath and walked into the animal hospital. “Hello, I was supposed to pick up my cat today.” The girl behind the desk barely even looked at me. She was playing with her phone and giggling while she twirled her hair. This was not off to a good start. I’m not gonna lie. I kind of wanted to smack her.

Be nice Nadine… “Name?”

“Honeysuckle.” Suddenly, she wasn’t so disinterested. Her voice got high pitched. The receptionist started gushing. “Oh yes, he picked her up already!” “Excuse me?” “So gentle and sweet for such a big man!” My heart started thudding in my chest. He hadn’t. He wouldn’t. He couldn’t. “What do you mean?” “Your boyfriend picked her up! Took care of the bill and everything. He even bought supplies for her. The good stuff too.” James had my cat. He had taken her hostage. It was brilliant. Cruel, but brilliant. He’d done the one thing that I couldn’t fight back against. He’d won. Checkmate. The receptionist was still prattling on about James and how wonderful he was. How kind. What she didn’t know was that he was punishing me. He was bringing me to heel. I thanked her numbly and walked out. I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket and pulled it out. Perfect fucking timing. I stared at my phone. James had been texting and calling since I left his house. He’d been demanding that I come back. That I finish what I’d started. That I belonged to him.

Get your ass back here right fucking now Deanie I am not joking around This is not negotiable You’re mine now. You fucking know it. And then just now:

I’m waiting That last one had been less than a minute ago. He must have just finished practice. He’d timed everything just right. I’d avoided class again, knowing he would be there. I was supposed to be at the Pussycat Lounge in an hour, but I assumed I’d been fired for walking out the other night. I didn’t have anywhere to be. I cringed, knowing I was losing the fight. James was going to get what he wanted after all. Delivered right to his doorstep with a big fat fucking bow wrapped around it like a gift. Only this time, it was me.

Chapter Fourteen James

The doorbell rang. Slowly, I walked over to it. Outwardly I looked calm. But inside I was pissed off. Furious really. She’d made me wait. She’d denied me. Well, that was about to change.

Right fucking now. I opened the door to see a pissed off little minx staring at me. Hellfire was in her eyes. I grinned. She looked beautiful when she was angry. She was never going to bore me, that was for sure. I let her in without a word. She turned around the second the door was shut, her hair flying. She looked like she was ready to fight. Good. So was I. As long as it ended with us getting horizontal. I tilted my head, staring at her, trying to figure out how to

get her into bed as quickly as possible. Actually, the wall would do quite nicely. “If you hurt her, so help me God!” “Hurt who? The stupid cat?” She looked around the room and froze. Honeysuckle was curled up in my favorite armchair, purring loudly. She’d been doing that since I brought her home. Nadine’s pretty red lips opened in surprise. I felt my cock fill with blood. It was just that easy with her. Ready. Set. Go. “Do you have something you want to say to me, Nadine?” I used my best Coach voice. Firm and vaguely disapproving. It worked. “Thank you- for getting her. I can pay you back.” I stepped towards her. She stepped away. “Yes, you can. But not with money.” Her mouth opened even wider. I licked my lips. I had all kinds of ideas of what I was going to do with her. “I know you are mad.” I nodded. “Damn right.” “I’m sorry I said that. I know you wouldn’t have hurt her.” I walked towards her as she backed away nervously. “Good. Now, if you are finished being a pain in the ass, you are going to listen to me. I have some things I need you to do. If you want to earn my forgiveness.” She looked from me to the cat. She must have caught

the look in my eyes. Like a cornered animal, she started looking for a place to escape to. I knew she wanted to run and hide. She spun in a circle, and found herself face to face with the stairwell. “You are definitely heading in the right direction.” She turned around. I yanked her against me. Her hands went to my chest. I growled and lowered my head, kissing her as hard as I wanted to. Deep, long, but not slow. No, this kiss was urgent. “James!” I leaned her backwards onto the stairs. Fuck the bed. I couldn’t wait. I yanked her clothes off, licking and sucking as I went. I groped her. I freed my cock from my pants and tugged her panties to the side. With a groan I slid inside her. She was wet. Just like I’d known she would be. We gasped in unison as our bodies collided. Then I started to pump myself into her. I wasn’t going slow and I wasn’t being gentle. I was making her mine. I plunged my cock in and out of her, making sure to keep her as hot as possible with my hands and mouth. I wasn’t taking any chances. I kissed her neck, my hands busy with her pointy little nipples. I felt her cum on my shaft, her sugar walls undulating against me. I held perfectly still until she was done. Then I shifted back, pulling my cock out.

“Turn over.” I didn’t wait for her to obey. I just lifted her up and over, arranging her hips so I had the best angle. Then I pushed myself in again. I grunted at the new sensation. Now I was riding her fast and hard. With each thrust I felt my cock bottom out against her womb. I was in as deep as I could get. But it still wasn’t enough. I wanted more. I grabbed her hips and started jackhammering my cock into her sweet little box. It was so tight, gripping me with each thrust. My dick felt like it had died and gone to heaven. Just then I felt her starting to cum again. It was too much. My cock jerked inside her and my seed exploded from my tip. I groaned in ecstasy as I unloaded into her again and again. Her body was convulsing as she pulled me deeper. It felt too good. Way too fucking good. It wasn’t until I reached down to pull out a few minutes later that I realized why. I’d forgotten to wear a condom.

Nadine

I was laying on my back, looking up at the ceiling. James was between my thighs, his lips and tongue doing indescribable things to me. Wild, dirty, sweet things. We’d finally made it to the bed. It had taken a while. But now we were here and he was doing all sorts of crazy things to my body. His hands toyed with my breasts as he made a meal of the sweet spot between my thighs. The tingly, sensitive, magical place. I tossed my head back and forth, feeling as if I was floating. I was done fighting him. I let him take complete control over me. It was such a relief to let go of all the things I’d been holding back. Keeping it all bottled up inside me. I wanted to be safe. Taken care of. If only for a little while. I wanted him. I rose up off the bed as he worked his magic on me. My back arched. My entire body started to convulse.

Just as I was peaking, he stopped. “James…” He was staring at me, his face serious. He positioned his cock between my thighs, teasingly rubbing it over my swollen pussy lips. I rocked my hips against him but he pulled back. Only when I stopped moving did he begin his teasing again. “What are you-“ He leaned down and kissed me hard. “You’re mine.” I nodded frantically. Eager to say anything that would make him give me what I wanted. Completion. “Say it.” “I’m yours.” “No more games. Promise me.” I shook my head. “I promise. Please James…” With an animalistic groan he slid into me. He’d been suffering as much as I had. He needed this just as badly. The thought that we were in this together was thrilling. It meant everything. It changed everything. He looked deeply into my eyes as he rode me, his hand lifting one leg, holding me in place. The feel of his cock inside me was indescribable. Hot, silky steel. I felt it expand and then he groaned in ecstasy. My body clenched down on him instinctively, milking him as he plunged in and out of me.

He grimaced as his hips bucked, sending him even deeper inside me. I felt liquid heat pool in my belly as I came with him. It seemed to go on forever. Finally he stilled. He rolled to his side, bringing me with him. I extricated myself from the tangle of his arms and legs. He was no help whatsoever, kissing and biting me as I tried to get out of the bed. “Where do you think you are going?” I rolled my eyes at him. “The bathroom. Is that alright, Master?” He leaned back, grinning at me. “Master… I like that.” I shook my head and grabbed my shirt, tugging it over my head. In seconds it was yanked back off of me. James was grinning at me foolishly. “No clothes.” I had to laugh. He was taking this master thing seriously. “Anything else?” He leaned forward, kissing my neck. “Yes. I want you to go on the pill.” My face got pale. I hadn’t even thought about it. He was nuzzling my neck. “Of course, you might already be pregnant.” “James! You didn’t just… Oh God. Oh my God.” He shrugged sheepishly. “It didn’t seem so important at the moment. On the stairs.” He tried to pull me back into bed with him. “Or the second time.”

My jaw dropped. The first time we had both been swept away. But the second time, he’d been in complete control. I was stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. “Do you think that’s funny?” He shook his head slowly. “No. But it doesn’t matter anyway. I’m keeping you.” Well, when he put it that way… it didn’t seem quite so bad.

Chapter Fifteen James

“Wake up sleepyhead.” I pulled the sheets down off of Nadine’s delectable body. I’d convinced her to stay here every night this week. And last week. Eventually I’d just gone to her place and packed her shit up again. Most of it was still in a bag. I couldn’t stand the thought of her being there another night. Plus I had other, more selfish motives… “Hmmfff?” I tickled her pretty little feet, trailing my fingers up her thighs. She made a sexy little sound and rolled onto her belly, giving me a great view of her cute little ass. I couldn’t help myself. I bit it. “Hey!” She rolled over, glaring at me. “Your alarm went off.”

She sat up abruptly. “Oh God, I’m late for work study.” “Don’t go.” She stared at me. “My scholarship is dependent on my work study.” I wanted to tell her that I would take care of it somehow, but I knew she wouldn’t like it. I had money. I wanted to take care of her. “What time is it over?” “Nine. Just enough time to get to my first class.” Damn. I’d been hoping to grab her before our afternoon classes. Otherwise I was going to have to wait until after practice and after work. I wouldn’t get what I wanted until midnight at the earliest. I rolled onto my back, moaning. “What’s wrong?” “You are making me wait. I don’t want to wait.” She smirked and smacked my shoulder. “You’ll get over it.” She crawled over me to get to the bathroom but I stopped her, grabbing her and flipping her onto her back. I went wild, growling and nipping her like a wild beast. She was laughing uncontrollably when I started grinding my hard on against her. That made her stop laughing. “James… Oh God… there’s no time.” She’s slept in one of my giant t-shirts. I lifted it up, pulling her nipple into my mouth. I was rewarded with a soft sigh. “Just a quickie.”

“I can’t. I already missed too many times this semester, remember?” I groaned, not stopping humping her for a minute. She gave me a look and I let her go, sighing dramatically. “Such a waste of a perfectly good boner.” She was still laughing as she turned on the shower. I leaned up to watch her yank the shirt off and slip into the shower. “I promise to take good care of you tonight!” I moaned. Tonight was so far away. Maybe I could help her wash up… The water turned off. I cursed. Nadine was a notoriously quick in the shower. I frowned, realizing that was probably because of the way she’d grown up… that crappy apartment… she’d never really had a safe place to relax and goof off in. Not until now. I was going to make her feel safe. I was going to take good care of her. I’d already started. I watched her get dressed. New jeans and a warm sweater. I’d taken her shopping last weekend. She’d resisted until I’d shown her all the free gift cards I got from the local mall. After that, she’d relented. Somewhat, anyway. She looked gorgeous in her new clothes. Not that she hadn’t before. But this ramped it up. I followed her downstairs. There was no point in going back to bed. Besides I wanted to be there when she saw her new present.

“Where’s my bag?” She was looking around nervously. Damn, I forgot how worried she got. I pointed to the table with a smirk. A brand new designer book bag was laying there. It was stuffed with all her stuff. And something else I’d gotten her. A new laptop. She just didn’t know that part yet. “What?” “It’s for you.” “James…” I pulled her into my arms. “Just relax. Go to work study. Open it when you get to class.” “Where’s my stuff?” “It’s all in there.” She chewed her lip, looking uncertain. “It’s just a new bag! Relax. Now, I think someone else wants to say goodbye.” I glanced down meaningfully. Honeysuckle was winding between our legs. Nadine bent down and scooped up the cat, kissing it’s fuzzy little head. I had to admit it, I was a little bit jealous of the cat. Honeysuckle started purring immediately. It always did that when Nadine as around. It was even starting to trust me a bit too. The stupid cat was growing on me. Nadine put the cat down and I walked her to the door, indulging in one last, long kiss. She waved as she started out in the early morning light. I

watched her, feeling a deep sense of contentment spread through me. Which was weird, considering the fact that my dick was still hard as a rock. I bent down to scratch the cat behind the ears. “Want some breakfast you little flea trap?”

Nadine

“Earth to Nadine, come in Nadine.” I was leaning against the counter at BB Smiths. I was only working three nights a week now. James had insisted. But it was fine. Now that I’d moved in with him I didn’t need the rent money. It made me nervous though. Being in his debt. I was dependent on him now. I didn’t like it. What if he changed his mind? What if he wanted someone else instead? I’d be shit out of luck, along with Honeysuckle. The three of us were not a happy little family. We were two fuck buddies and a scrawny little cat. I kept reminding myself that. Still… the way he made me feel. I wanted to trust him. I wanted to just relax and be… I shook my head. I was falling in love with him. I knew it. I was trying to fight it but I was pretty sure it was already too late.

It wasn’t just his good looks or the incredible way he made my body feel. It wasn’t just his talent and exceptional physical prowess. It was also his kindness. His sense of humor. His generosity. I was still reeling from what I’d found in my bag during my first class. I’d opened it, expecting to find my stack of notebooks. Instead I’d found a shiny new Macbook Air. I’d used his a few times and liked it. So he’d bought me one. My heart had been thudding like crazy when I pulled it out and put it on the desk. Everyone else was listening to the professor speak. I was staring at my new toy. All my files had been on it, neatly organized. There was even a baggie full of fresh thumb drives. And any software I could have hoped for.

Jesus. Maybe he did care about more than just… nailing me as much as possible. Though, to be fair, I wasn’t exactly complaining about that. I was just afraid to get too comfortable. Because that’s when you got hurt. I knew that from experience. “Oooo, that’s pretty. New bag?” Lana was pointing at the dark green book bag James had gotten me. I nodded. Her eyes took me in. “New jeans too. Wow girl, you must be making bank at the Pussycat Lounge.” “I quit actually.”

“That was fast.” “Yeah, it’s not for me.” “So what’s with the new stuff?” I shrugged. “Gifts.” Her eyebrows shot straight up. “From a guy?” I nodded sheepishly. “From the guy?” Lana had told me how James had come in and pestered her into telling him where I was. But she hadn’t caved. I knew I could trust her. “Yeah. James. He’s… really nice.”

“Nice?” She laughed at me. “He’s not nice. He’s FINE. And he’s going to be rich as fuck when he gets signed. Just you wait.” I stared at her. I hadn’t thought about that. He was a senior. I was just a freshman. That meant… Fuck. That meant I was really stupid. Really, really stupid. “Anyway, you got a table. They seem kind of rowdy but they asked for you.” I glanced over to my section. There were a bunch of guys over there. I recognized them. They were local. A little older than the college crowd. They worked at the mill. They came in here a lot. They flirted pretty heavily but they tipped well. I did my best to ignore it.

I grabbed my pad and walked over to them. “Hello sunshine.” I smiled impersonally at Dewy. His buddies Cadence and Al were smirking at me. No, not me. My tits. I hid my distaste and took their orders. They always started with beer before moving on to food. Lots and lots of beer. When I bent over to put the pitcher down, Dewy’s hand slid across my ass. I jumped back, glaring at him. “Don’t do that!” He held his hands up. “Oh oh oh, sorry young lady! No harm, no foul.” I stared at him, at his greasy smirk, feeling sick to my stomach. I shook it off, walking back to the bar to watch the rest of my tables. I heard Dewy say something about tenderloin. I knew he was talking about me, not the daily specials. “Hey, you okay?” “Yeah, those guys just got handsy with me.” “You want me to take over?” “Would you? I can’t deal with them today.” Lana smiled and winked. “I don’t mind a little handsy now and then. From the right guy of course.” I laughed and leaned again the bar. I was tired. I couldn’t wait to go home with James. I checked my tables. Nobody need anything so I decided to get some fresh air. I walked out front and inhaled deeply. It was chilly out but the air felt fresh and clean. I had my eyes closed when I felt

the hand close over my mouth. I struggled as I was dragged backwards towards the alley. I kicked out. I heard someone curse. It sounded like Al. Rage and fear filled me as I realized what was happening. My own customers were doing this to me.

Motherfuckers! It was dark but I could see Dewey standing in front of me. My arms were held by his buddies. I stared in horror as he reached for his fly. He pulled out his cock and started rubbing it grotesquely. “What’s the matter sunshine? We’re not good enough for you? You can’t even bring us beer?” He spit on his hand and started stroking himself. “I’m about to prove you wrong on that, you little cock tease. Get her pants down.” The hands on my shoulders let go, grabbing my hips. I knew it was now or never. I brought my elbows down on their backs, hard. I heard them cry out in pain. They didn’t let go though. “Oh you are going to pay for that little missy.” I was shoved against the cold brick wall. My head slammed backward, making me see stars. I tried to fight them but one held my shudders while the other worked on my pants. I felt the cool air on my skin as they pulled my jeans down. “No… please don’t…” I hated the weakness in my voice. I was helpless. I started to cry in terror.

Dewey stepped closer, reaching for me. Then his head jerked to the side, distracted by something coming towards us. Something large. A shadow fell over us. “What the?” And just like that, he was gone. I heard two thuds and the hands holding me let go. “You okay?” I nodded shakily. James. It was James. He’d saved me. He was pulling my pants up as I trembled in his arms. I saw a shadow move in the darkness behind him. “Behind you!” The guys jumped him from behind and James peeled them off of him one by one. He was throwing punches left and right. I watched it awe as he took on all three men. He was younger, and stronger, but I knew he could still get hurt. “Stop!” Al landed a punch to his belly. James didn’t even flinch as he turned to drive his fist into Al’s face. He went down and stayed down. Now it was just Dewey and Cadence against Fitz. I exhaled, knowing James had this covered. He twisted and turned, driving them back. I saw Dewey fall. He came back up with a piece of wood. He lifted it like a bat. “James, look out!” He turned, ducking just in time. My blood went cold. Dewey could have killed him.

James went insane then, grabbing Dewey by the shirt and driving his fist into his face again and again. Dewey slumped, losing consciousness. But James kept hitting him. Al was on his back, trying to drag him off. “Stop! You’re killing him!” He shrugged Al off. Al stood back, clearly not willing to continue the fight. Then he turned tail and ran, leaving his friends laying unconscious on the ground. James pulled me into his arms, his bloody hand cradling my face. “Are you okay?” I nodded shakily. He slung his arm over my shoulder and we walked slowly out of the alley. In the light of the street I could see he was in bad shape. He slumped against the bench that was outside for smokers. “James… Oh God. You’re hurt!” Lana ran outside. “Holy shit!” “Lana, we need an ambulance!” She nodded and ran back inside. James tried to stand up. “I’m fine. Let’s just go home Deanie. You promised…” I shook my head, pushing him back down. His hands looked like bloody messes. His cheek was swollen and his lip split. “Oh James…” Lana was back in a minute with my backpack. “They’re on their way. What happened?”

“Those guys jumped me.” Her eyes were as wide as saucers. “Where are they?” I jerked my head. “In the alley. One of them got away. That guy Al, I think.” She nodded. “Let me know what happens, ‘kay? Hope the big guy’s alright.” “I will.” She stood up straight and winked at me. “I’m going to go tell Casey and the guys to take out the trash.” I would have laughed. But I was too scared. James was hurt bad. And it was my fault. I heard the sirens approaching and leaned down to kiss his forehead. He grinned at me, his lips red with blood. James tried to grab me, to pull me in for a kiss and I laughed. He was incorrigible. I laughed. But inside, I was crying.

Chapter Sixteen James

I stared at Nadine across the ambulance as the EMT’s gave me the once over. They were afraid that my hand might be broken. My ribs too. I didn’t care though. I was still furious. Someone had tried to touch my woman. To hurt her. She looked so small. I knew she was strong even being as tiny as she was. But I didn’t want her to have to be. I wanted to be strong for her. What kind of fucked up world was it where men would just try hurt someone like her? To take what wasn’t theirs? To hurt something so beautiful and pure? I clenched my fist, wanting to go back and hit those guys again. Nadine had her arms wrapped around her. Her pretty face was puffy from crying. Her new jeans were torn from being pulled off of her.

I growled, trying to sit up. Immediately the EMT’s held me down, strapping me to the gurney. “Easy, easy.” “Nadine…” They stepped back and signaled her over. She sat on the edge of the gurney, staring down at me. Her hand brushed my hair away from my face. “Oh James… I wish you hadn’t done that.” “You’re my woman. I will always protect you, Deanie.” She closed her eyes, tears spilling down her cheeks. “You know that, right?” She nodded. “Come here.” She leaned down and brushed her lips across mine. I tried to grab her but I couldn’t. She pulled back too fast. “You remember your promise from this morning, don’t you?” She laughed through her tears. “I don’t think that’s happening tonight, James.” I let my head fall back. “Maybe not. But I am taking an IOU.” She nodded and smiled. The ambulance stopped then. The siren stopped. The doors opened. The gurney tilted and was lowered to the ground. Then they were rolling me away. I could see Nadine standing in the parking lot filling out a clip board. She wasn’t leaving. She wouldn’t do that.

I knew it. But for some reason, a terrible feeling came over me. I needed her dammit. The rushed me into the ER and started poking and prodding me. It hurt like hell. Then one of the nurses recognized me. “Holy shit, it’s Fitz!” I made a up thumbs up and grimaced. Even that hurt. Maybe I had overdid it with those scumbags in the alley… Nah. “Do you have his paperwork?” “Here.” “You the girlfriend?” “Yes, I am.” I heard Deanie’s voice in the background but I couldn’t see her. She must be behind the sheets. “Any allergies? Underlying physical conditions?” “Not that I know of.” “We’re going to give him something for the pain and get some x-rays. Do you know what happened?” “Three guys… they jumped him. He was protecting me.” “Okay. You can wait in the waiting area. Is there someone you should call?” “The school I guess. His coach.” A nurse bent over me, injecting something into my arm. A warm feeling filled my body. My eyes fluttered shut. I wanted to see her. To tell her not to worry, that I was tough. But instead, I just sunk deeper and deeper into the bed. Light out.

Nadine

I paced back and forth, hugging my backpack against me like a teddy bear. Not that I’d ever had a teddy bear. Not that I could remember anyway. It seemed like I’d never held anything until James and Honeysuckle. But right now, I felt like I’d lost both of them. Everything that mattered. Call it intuition. But it felt like my dreams had been stolen in that alley way. Dreams I hadn’t even known I had. Dreams I hadn’t even dared to indulge in. A future. With James. A life together. I shook my head, trying to push those thoughts away. All that mattered right now was that he was okay. Nothing else. Not me or my silly schoolgirl obsession with him. Or whatever it was now… “Miss? He’s asking for you.” A nurse stood in front of me. It had been hours since we’d gotten here. I hadn’t sit

down once. They wouldn’t tell me anything specific about his condition since I wasn’t related to him. But they couldn’t stop me from seeing him. I followed him upstairs to another waiting room. They must have moved James. The nurse led me to a private room. James was laying there with his eyes closed and his hands wrapped. He looked awful but at least the blood was gone. “Is he awake?” “He’s in and out of consciousness. But he keeps asking for you. Just stay with him until his family gets here.” “Oh I should have called his mother…” “That’s been taken care of.” “How bad is he?” “I think he’ll be alright. I can’t really discus it with you.” I nodded and pulled a chair over to the side of the bed. The nurse had been kind enough to throw me a crumb of reassurance. That would have to be enough. I sat down and reached for his hand, sliding mine underneath it. No cast. Hopefully it wasn’t broken. I knew how important his hands were for football. I stared out the window and prayed. I felt sick at the thought of him ruining his career for me. I wasn’t worth it. I felt him squeeze my hand and looked up. James was smiling at me goofily. He looked ridiculous. Like he was in love with me. I tried to keep a straight face. “God, you’re beautiful Deanie.” I leaned up, brushing his hair back.

“I told you a hundred times, call me Nadine.” He reached up, trying to drag me into bed. Then he grimaced in pain. “Be careful James! You’re injured!” “I don’t care. Kiss me woman!” I gave him a quick peck and then scooted the chair back, folding my arms over my chest. He frowned at me. “Come back here.” “No.” He scowled, looking like a little kid who wanted some candy. Or a toy. I guess in his drugged mind, I was both. “How do you feel?” He grinned at me dopily. “Horny!” I laughed. He really did have a one track mind. “That’s too bad because I’m pretty sure you are too high to get it up.” “I am not!” He tried to sit up, pushing the blankets aside. I rushed to his side. “James! I’m just kidding. Here, let me help you.” There as a little button to lift his head. I pressed it and he smiled at me as the bed folded into a lounge position. As soon as he was upright he tried to grab my boobs. “Gimme.” I stepped back again. “Be serious James. You’re injured. They need to do tests.” He shook his head.

“I’m fine. Nothing broken.” Relief flooded me. “Oh good. They wouldn’t tell me anything because we aren’t related. I was so worried.” “I’m going to marry you. Then we’ll be related.” “What?” James was staring at me, his eyelids slowly drifting shut. He must have over exerted himself. I thought he was asleep until he said one more thing. His eyes opened to half mast as he grabbed my hand. “Don’t you love me, Deanie?” He sounded like a little boy again. I couldn’t resist him like this. Especially when what he was asking was the truth. I nodded and he smiled, his eyes drifting shut. “You know I do.” He fell asleep with a cute little smile on his lips. I knew it was the drugs talking. I hoped he wouldn’t remember that I’d admitted loving him. Or be embarrassed that he’d asked me to marry him when he had to explain that he hadn’t meant it. One thing was for sure. I knew that I would never forget how I felt in that moment. Good. In a way I’d never felt before. From the inside out. Even while I started to talk myself out of it. It was dark out when I opened my eyes again. My head was on the hospital bed, by James’s thigh. “Well, isn’t this cozy?” I jerked upright, staring around the room. The lights were dim so it took me a minute to see him. There, standing in

the corner was a man I recognized from TV. Some would say he was the most important man in the whole damn town. Coach Adams was staring at me with a look of pure disdain. “Let’s step outside, shall we?”

Chapter Seventeen James

I blinked as I drifted in and out of consciousness. They’d given me something for the pain. It made me feel warm and fuzzy inside. I flexed my hand gingerly. It still hurt. But I could use it. Which meant I could play. Nadine would be relieved. I knew she was worried. I knew she felt responsible. How silly was that? A woman blaming herself for her man taking care of her? I smiled, remembering the look on her face when I’d told her I was going to marry her. Disbelief. Then something else… happiness. It looked good on her. And then she’d admitted she loved me. I’d been waiting for that. Every time I took her. Every time I’d made her thrash around on my bed in ecstasy, I’d hoped. Three little words. Well, if I had to get beat up to hear them, that was alright

with me. “Nadine?” It was bright daylight outside. There were people in the room, talking to me. A doctor. Nurses. Coach Adams. Where was Deanie? “Deanie?” “He’s been asking for her all day.” I saw Coach Adams shake his head. “Son, you are going to be alright. Don’t worry.” “Where’s Nadine?” “She… had to go. Now you just focus on resting up and getting better. It’s a good thing we have ten days before the next game. In the meantime, I have some news for you. Miami wants to talk drafting you early.” I stared at him, uncomprehending. Something was wrong. Where was Nadine? “Where is she?” “You just relax James. I’ll give her a call, alright?” I nodded, slumping back into the pillows. I barely heard Coach as he walked into the hallway with the doctors. The nurse leaned over me, injecting something into my IV line. “That girl must have a grade A pussy to get him so riled up.” “What should we tell him when he wakes up again?” “Tell him she didn’t answer. She’s gone. I saw to that.” I couldn’t process what they were saying. All I heard were those two little words. The worst words I’d heard in my entire life.

She’s gone.

Nadine

You’re trash. You’re garbage. You’re holding him back. You are destroying him. Coach Adams words were echoing in my brain as I packed my few belongings into a duffle bag. It was one of the free team bags James had everywhere. He wouldn’t miss it. The irony wasn’t lost on me.

If you care about that boy’s future at all, you will turn around and never look back. That part, I knew was right. I hadn’t cried. I hadn’t said a word. But I’d nodded. And I’d left. The last thing he’d said to me was to throw out my phone. He’d thrust a wad of cash into my fist for a bus ticket out of town. I’d dropped it on the ground, not even caring anymore. I remembered my phone suddenly. It was the only way he

would find me. The only way he’d be able to wear me down.

James has a real future. Not with some white trash little bitch dragging him down. Do him a favor and get lost. I closed my eyes and tossed it into the kitchen garbage can. It hurt to do it but I did it anyway. I didn’t want to leave James. I didn’t want to think about never seeing him again. But I knew Coach was right. It was my fault he’d gotten injured. And he didn’t need me. Not really. I remembered the drawer full of condoms upstairs. He’d gotten rid of them when I went on the pill. But he could get more. He’d be out there man whoring it up in no time. I shook my head, telling myself not to think about that. It was the past. James was the past. I had to forget him. I had to cut him out of my heart. I poured extra food into three bowls. There. That should last Honeysuckle at least a week. I hated to leave her, but where I was going, nobody was safe. I wouldn’t give anyone a chance to hurt her ever again. I knew in my heart, that James would look after her. Even if he didn’t love me, he had a good heart. He’d make sure she was safe. I slung the bag over my shoulder and walked out. I locked the door and slipped the key under the doormat. Then I turned back, taking one last look. I’d been happy here. But I’d been living a dream.

Now it was time to wake up. Slowly, I walked through town towards the bus station. My mind started to work through the practicalities of what I was doing. I could maybe get my professors to give me extensions. Come back next year. Once he was gone. Who was I kidding? Once I got on that bus it was over. I was never coming back again. I was toast. I would turn into my mother after all. Or worse. I stopped walking, staring into space. I could stay and fight for him. I could prove his coach wrong. But that wouldn’t last anyway. Not once he was rich and famous. If he ever got there. There was a good chance that if I stayed, it wouldn’t work out for either of us. Or I could leave and make it easier for everyone. Rip it off like a bandaid. Let it bleed. There was one thing for sure. I couldn’t stay in his place anymore. Coach Adams had made it abundantly clear that his housing was in jeopardy if I stayed. That the team could make things harder for him. And impossible for me. He’d told me that one more punch would have ended Jame’s career. Permanently. And with a low rent skank like me around, he was ‘sure to be getting into a lot of fights.’ I choked back a sob. I knew that’s what I looked like to him. I wasn’t special like Fitz. I wasn’t as talented. Lots of people could paint or draw. Not that many could play ball

like he could. Maybe it would all work out. Maybe I would find a job back home that paid enough for school. I could go local. Pay my way. Earn a degree after all. It could happen. It would take longer, sure. But it could be done. I stepped up to the counter at the bus station. My heart felt like it was being torn in two. I wanted to do nothing more than run to James, beg him to forgive me. To take me home and hold me all night. But I knew I couldn’t. Not now. Not after everything that had happened. No matter what though, I’d never forget him. Maybe we could meet again in another life. It just wasn’t going to be this one.

Chapter Eighteen James

I tapped my toes, finally standing on my own feet after three days in the hospital. A car was waiting for me to take me home. I’d only have long enough to pack and leave again. I had shit to do. A meeting in Miami. But that was secondary to my primary goal: to find out where the hell my girlfriend was at. Had she left me after all? That’s what Coach had said. The nurses too. They said she was gone. That’s all. No word. Even my texts were going unopened. Unread. I shook my head. There was no way she’d just leave like that. She loved me. She’d told me so. I cursed. I needed to track her down but I had promised coach I would take this meeting. I climbed into the car, my brain trying to play catch up now that I was off my pain meds.

I stared blindly out the window. If It took the spot with Miami that meant not graduating. Or graduating on delay, with special tutors making sure I passed the last few classes remotely. It could work. But not without her. I raced into my townhouse, calling her name. I’d hoped that maybe, just maybe she was here. But the place was empty. There were three half eaten bowls of cat food on the floor. So I knew she’d been here at least. I pulled out my phone, calling her again. The cat was winding it’s way around my legs when I heard it. Her phone. It was coming from the garbage can. That’s when it hit me. She really was gone. She’d left. Cut ties. But why? And what the fuck was I going to do about it? I bent down to scratch the silly cat’s ears. “Where’d she go, huh? Do you know?” If she’d left the cat behind, that meant she was going someplace she couldn’t take her. That didn’t really narrow things down much though. I put out fresh food and water and then I packed. While I did, I made some calls. I called the school and asked if they knew. I called BB Smiths. She’d quit with no notice apparently. The manager sounded worried though, not pissed off. I even called Coach to ask him one more time what her exact words had

been. He told me to ‘get my head in the game and forget her.’ I hung up, feeling vaguely uneasy about Coach’s part in all of this. I got into the limo they’d sent to get me to the airpot and fly me to Miami. I rubbed my neck, trying to figure out what to do. Then I called a private detective. No way was she getting away from me that easy. Not without answers. Not without giving me a chance to prove that I deserved her. That we deserved a real chance. She’d run away before. That was her MO. Well, this time I wasn’t letting her off the hook. I pulled out my wallet. I had a picture in there, folded up. It was a crumpled doodle I’d found on the back of a magazine. The sketch was a man in profile. He was bent forward, his head tilted. Watching something with a sardonic look on his face. Proud. Unimpressed. Arrogant. It was me. I knew she loved me the moment I saw that thing. That’s why I kept it. Not only was she damn good at drawing but she’d captured something in it that was so real, so sad, that it pierced my heart.

Come back to me Deanie.

Nadine

The steps were creaky, feeling like they might collapse at any time. The old house looked about the same. A little bit worse for wear maybe. If that was possible. I pushed the door open and looked around. It looked like a tornado had hit it. A drunk, mean spirited tornado. I was back. “Hi Mom.” She stared at me bleary eyed from the sofa. I’d almost missed her in all the junk. Her ugly old bathrobe was patterned, making her blend nicely with the surroundings. Camouflage. That was smart around here. “Where’s Steve?” “Deanie!” She moved surprisingly quick for a mean old drunk. She wrapped her arms around me, stronger than she looked. I could smell the reek of stale cigarets and malt liquor. I held perfectly still, waiting for the rare fit of motherly love to pass. It always did.

“I thought you were dead girl! My girl, my beautiful baby!” She grabbed my cheeks and I flinched. Her eyes were full of ecstatic glee. She looked high. I wondered if she’d graduated from weed and booze and pills to something harder. Not that it made a difference. I just needed a place to stay for a little while. I was already realizing this was a mistake. I should have just found a motel somewhere. Anywhere but here. I’d been so broken that I’d actually thought this was a good idea. Her hands were on my book bag, tugging at it. “Whatchu got here?” “Nothing. It’s mine.” “How you afford all this? You whoring?” I felt the bile rise in my throat. Of course that’s what she would think. Of course. My own mother assumed I was a whore. I shook my head. “No mom. Can I stay here for a few weeks? Just till I figure out where to go?” She stared at me blankly. Then I saw her wheels start to spin. What would Steve say? How could she get at my stuff? What was in it for her? “Gotta ask Steve.” I sighed. “It’s your house Mom.” “His now. See?” She held up her finger. A cheap brass ring was on her left ring finger. Somehow, even though he’d chased her only

child away, my mother had married the bastard she’d been living with all these years. I guess it didn’t matter. They were common law married anyway. But somehow, it made everything seem worse. “Okay mom. I’m going to lie down for a little bit. Is that okay?” “Sure, sure. Go on up. Just like you left it.” I walked up the stairs, wondering how low I could really slide. This was a place I’d sworn never to go back to. But it was the only place I knew would never turn me away. If ‘Steve’ approved anyway. I pushed open the door. My room was dusty and cluttered but intact. I closed the door. The lock was still there. Not that it did any good at keeping anyone out. But I was bigger now. I could fight. Stand up for myself. I didn’t need a lock. Slowly I lowered myself to the bed and started to cry. Not for this shitty place I’d grown up in. Not for myself. I cried for James. He probably hated me for running out on him. What kind of person left someone they loved behind in a hospital. It was better if he hated me though. Cleaner. But it felt like I was being ripped in two. When I woke up it was dark out. I could hear voices downstairs. They weren’t arguing though. They were just talking. Some loud music came on. I heard the familiar sound of heavy footsteps on the stairs. The door flung open without a knock.

My stepfather stood there, leering at me drunkenly. At least some things hadn’t changed. “Well lookee here. Look what the cat dragged in.” My mother’s face appeared over his shoulder. He glanced back at her, his tone changing. “Welcome back sweetie! We sure are glad to see you.” Steve toasted me with his open beer and headed back downstairs. My mom looked thrilled. She was beaming like Mother fucking Theresa. If she had a halo though, hers would be cheap neon. I could almost see it, flickering above her head. In the darkness, smiling like that, I could see how pretty she’d been. Before the hard life and booze had taken it’s toll. I felt a spurt of pity for her. “He said you could stay! I told you it’d be alright.” She’d never told me any such thing. Still, I knew all the years of drinking had given her memories a warm and hazy glow. She didn’t really know what the hell she was talking about. But I didn’t want to be cruel. “Thanks mom.” She nodded happily and wandered off back downstairs. I knew I should get up, get something to eat, but I didn’t move. I doubted there was anything nutritious in the kitchen anyway. Unless you counted beer. I was afraid to leave my room though, for more than one reason. I knew they would try to steal my shit as soon as I left it alone. I decided to get a locker at the Y. I could use the computer there. Look for a job.

I could do this. I’d start tomorrow. Maybe I’d find something on the other side of the earth.

Chapter Nineteen James

“We think you’d make a great addition to the team.” “The season’s halfway over. Is this for next year?” He shook his head. “We need new blood now. That and we want to grab you before the draft.” I smiled. I liked the head manager of the Dolphins. He was a straight shooter with a great reputation. The head coach was there too. This was not a casual meeting. They really wanted me to sign with them. “Second tier?” “No James, we want you to start.” I was blown away. Starting quarterback? Right out of the gate? It was unheard of. Especially mid season. Especially with a rookie. “Hopefully this will help you make your decision. You are our first choice by the way. Everybody else is on hold until

you decide.” He slid an envelope across the table to me. I opened it. The check inside was more money that I’d ever imagined. “Is this for the year?” “That’s a signing bonus, son. Your pay is double that. Per season. Five year contract.” I exhaled sharply. Nobody got five year contracts anymore. Not for this much money. This was the chance of a lifetime. I would be crazy not to take it. “I’m excited. I just need to go over a few things with my rep.” “Of course. Just get us the contracts within forty eight hours. We’re ready to move ahead.” We shook hands and stood. That was it. I was a pro-ball player. “How’s your eye?” He pointed to his own eye. I knew what he meant. I still had one hell of a bruise. “It’s all good.” “There was some trouble. With a girl I believe?” “My girlfriend got jumped by some scum bags. I took care of it.” He laughed. “If that doesn’t sound like drama, I don’t know what is.” I smirked. “She attracts a lot of attention. But I think down here I could keep an eye on her.” He nodded. “So its a package deal then?”

“Yeah, I need to get my mom and my lady set up as well.” “We can help with that. We get a nice discount with a few of the new condos around here. They like having players move in. Family too.” “That would be great.” “I don’t want to dissuade you, but you do realize how hot the women in Miami are right? You could have your pick.” I grinned. “I already do.” “Fair enough.” I left the stadium and got into the town car they’d provided. On the way back to the hotel I couldn’t help but smile, imagining my new life here. Of course, that included my woman, if I could just fucking find her. I had to face facts though. She’d ghosted on me. And when I found her, I was going to make her pay for it. I pulled out my phone and called my mom. She’d been worried about me since the fight, I knew. “How’d you like to move to Miami?”

Nadine

The Y had free wifi and a small library. I was in there for the second day in a row. All day. I’d brought all my stuff with me. It stayed there, locked up over night. That was the only way I knew my charming family wouldn’t steal it. So far I’d found a couple of live in nanny jobs and a caretaker job on the west coast. I’d sent off my resume and hoped for the best. California sounded nice. It was warm. Spacious. Far from here. I’d also scoured for local waitressing jobs. I’d heard of jobs at resorts and country clubs where your housing was part of the pay. I’d applied to twenty jobs at least, using Casey as a reference. He and Lana were the only people who knew that I’d left. I closed my eyes, imagining how James must have felt when he’d realized I was gone. Relieved maybe. But somehow, I doubted it. I was starting to think he

might be devastated. As devastated as I felt even. It was possible, wasn’t it? It should have made me feel better. Instead, I felt worse. They were shutting down for the night so I packed my stuff up. I waited until nobody was looking and hid my laptop into the deepest part of my duffle bag. Then I grabbed a set of clean clothes and shoved them into my book bag. I figured my stuff was safe here over night. Safer than at home anyway. On the way home I grabbed a sandwich and a bottle of water. I had a book from the library. I figured I could lock myself in my room again. Where it was safe. The music was blasting as usual. The TV was also on. I waved at my mom and headed up the stairs, reminding myself to get earplugs the next time I went out. I ate my sandwich and read until I got tired. I stared out the window for a while, watching the neighborhood come and go. Not much had changed. Maybe I hadn’t changed either. Around three AM I woke up. It took me a minute to figure out what was wrong. I turned on the light and stared at the door. The doorknob was rattling. A sick feeling settled in my chest. I knew who it was. Steve. So many nights I had woken up to him creeping at my door. I’d had enough by the time he finally got up the

courage to pick the lock. I’d hidden from him that night. By morning, I was gone. I wanted to open the door and punch him. I wanted to scream at him. Tell my mother how bad he’d scared me all those years ago. I wanted to push his ass down the stairs and out of my mother’s life. Instead I flipped off the light and sat there in the dark. Eventually he went away. I knew that if I stayed here he’d pick the lock again in time. I was running out of time. I had a few days grace period at best. After that, I’d have to fight. There was no way in hell I was letting him put his hands on me. Not him, or anyone else I didn’t want. Not when I knew how good it could be. James had shown me that at the very least. And so much more. In the morning I took a hasty shower. It was safe at this hour. After drinking all night they were rarely up before noon. I stepped outside and saw Mrs. Fitzpatrick. She was on her porch, struggling to get something down the stairs. I was about to help her when I realized what was about to happen. If she saw me, she’d tell James. But maybe by now, he didn’t care anyway. He probably had moved on. Maybe she didn’t even know about us. Still, it seemed better to sneak off without saying

anything… “Deanie? Is that you?” Oops. Too late now. “Hi Mrs. Fitzpatrick. Can I help you with that?” “Oh would you dear? I’m moving.” I took the box to the curb and lowered it. I was happy for her. She’d always been a lot classier than the neighborhood. But as a single mother and a widow, she’d been stuck here with the rest of us. “That’s nice. Where are you moving to?” “Down south. I can’t wait to be warm all year long!” “That sounds lovely.” “It does, doesn’t it? Are you staying here long?” “No. I just came back to get a few things sorted out.” She smiled at me knowingly, putting her hand on my shoulder. “I know it hasn’t been easy for you Deany. You’re a good girl. You’ll be fine.” I felt my eyes well up. At least someone believed in me. If only I believed in myself. “Come in, have a cup of coffee.” I knew I should say no but I wanted to go in. I wanted to bask in the warmth of her kitchen one more time. It would be almost as good as seeing James again. But I had to find a way out of this situation. “Thanks Mrs. Fitzgerald. Another time.” I didn’t mean it. She didn’t have to know that though. “Don’t be a stranger!”

Chapter Twenty James

I tipped the delivery guy and closed the door. I turned around and saw Honeysuckle pacing back and forth impatiently in front of her bowl. “Alright, alright! I got it.” I stacked the cans from the pet store on the counter. I shook the box of dry food, making her stop and stare at me. “Oh so now I have your attention?” She tilted her head. I could swear she knew what I was saying. I’d been talking to her a lot since I got back the night before. The damn cat might just be keeping me from losing my mind. I scraped half a can into her bowl and stepped back, watching her eat. Such a funny little thing. Cute. Even with her broken tail. It

sort of bent in the middle from the accident. I smiled. If she hadn’t already been named, I would have called her Twisted. My phone rang and I scooped it up, hoping it might be her. Nadine. The detective hadn’t found anything yet. I was starting to get frantic. “James?” “Hi Mom.” I listened to her talk about getting ready to move with one ear. I couldn’t stop worrying about my girl. Where she was. What she was doing. If she was safe. “Wait- what did you say?” “I said that sweet girl Deanie’s back. She’s grown into such a beautiful woman.” “Deanie is there? Since when? Mom, why didn’t you tell me?” “What do you mean?” “I told you I was seeing her. She disappeared on me.” “Nadine is Deanie? Oh son, I didn’t think…” “Can you keep her there? Get her to your house for dinner?” “I suppose so. You know, I was actually glad when she ran away. After the way her stepfather was looking at her.” My blood ran cold. “What do you mean?” “Well, let’s just say that it’s not the way a man should look at a young girl. I was afraid for her.” I felt sick. Everything fell into place. Nadine’s virginity at

her age. Her prickly nature. Her disdain for men. How scared she’d been the first time I’d held her. “That’s why I never said anything when I found her sleeping under our porch.” “What?” “Right around the age she started to sprout. She was always hiding under there. Where the honeysuckle grows.” Of course. She was just like the damn cat. A survivor. She must have felt safe under there. That’s why she called the cat that silly name. I felt like an idiot. I felt helpless. I felt so angry I was ready to punch someone. She’d hid under our porch. Like a stray. Now she was on the run. Still alone. Well fuck that. I was going to keep her safe. From now fucking on. I picked up the phone again. First thing I did was book a ticket to Chicago, leaving in two hours. Then I called my rep. “Tell them I’m in. But they need to find me a place that takes cats. And help get my girlfriend into FSU for second semester, transfer her credits, everything.” “You got it Fitz.” I put out a a big bowl of water and food for the cat and packed quickly. I was feeling better than I’d felt since she’d taken off. At last, I was getting what I wanted. What I needed. I was going to get my woman.

Nadine

My back hurt. My head hurt. My feet hurt. I was pretty sure I was getting calluses.

Real attractive Nadine. I’d been out all day pounding the pavement, looking for jobs. I hadn’t heard back from even one of the out of town gigs I’d applied to. So far, the only interest I’d gotten was from a greasy spoon diner. I’d also filled out an application at a local dive bar. I doubted the pay would be enough to get out of here, let alone enough for school. How had everything gotten so fucked up? Not things had been all that great to begin with. I reached into my bag, fishing for my house keys. “Nadine.” I looked up. My stomach dropped to the ground. I felt my heart begin to thud heavily in my chest. James was standing in the middle of the sidewalk. I was so happy to see him it hurt. And then I saw the look

on his face. He was mad. Really, really mad. So I did the only sensible thing I could think of. I turned and ran. He caught me easily, spinning me to face him. “Oh no you don’t.” We stared at each other for a minute, neither of us speaking. Then his mouth crashed down on mine. I threw myself against him, feeling like I couldn’t get enough of him. I could never get enough. Our tongues swirled. I could feel how much he wanted me. He had missed me after all. I could also tell I was about to get a tongue lashing. And not the fun kind. “God damn it, Nadine!”

Here it comes. “Can we not do this on the street?” “Fine. But it’s not like the neighbors aren’t used to it.” He had a point there. James gestured to his mother’s porch. Slowly I climbed the steps and sat down. He sat down next to me. For a minute he didn’t look at me. I wondered if he hated me. I wouldn’t blame him if he did. Even though he still wanted me. Finally he spoke. “You should have told me you were alright.” “I wanted to.” “Then why didn’t you?” I shook my head. He stared at me. He figured it out on

his own. “Coach. Right?” I nodded, wrapping my arms around myself. “He told me that if I cared about your future I should just go away. I was dragging you down.” He cursed and stood up. “That’s bullshit Nadine and you know it. That’s the cowards way out.” “Maybe. But I was dragging you down. You could have lost your whole career.” “That’s not your responsibility. It’s mine.” He grinned, flexing his hand. “I shouldn’t have hit those scum bags so hard.” He leaned down, bracing his arms on either side of me. “But I wanted to hit them a lot harder.” “James…” “They touched something that was mine.” I stared at him, wondering what he was getting at. I knew he was going to punish me for leaving. I just wasn’t sure how. But right now he just seemed relieved. And determined. “You belong to me Nadine.” I shook my head, trying to get away from him. He didn’t let me. He held me while I stared at his chest. I couldn’t even look at him. “I’m damaged goods Fitz.” “No, you’re not Deanie. Don’t say that.” “I am!”

I stared at him, trying to make him see. “You should just get on with it. You don’t want me anyway. Except like that.” “The hell I don’t!” He kissed me and I forced myself to hold still. Not to respond. He stopped, pushing me away with a curse. “Your stepdad did this to you? Made you so scared?” I looked up at him. How did he know? It didn’t matter. Nothing mattered anymore. I just wanted the pain to stop. “No!” “Don’t lie to me Deanie!” “He didn’t do shit! But he tried. That’s why I left.” “Jesus Deanie, why didn’t you tell me?” I shrugged, my shoulders hunched protectively. He grabbed me, holding me against his chest. I felt so safe. But I knew that it wouldn’t last. “What do you want from me James? Just tell me. I will give it to you. And then you can get on with your life.” “I want a life with you.” I just shook my head. I was tired of fighting. He grabbed my shoulders, shaking me lightly. “What about you? What about your life?” I lifted my chin, staring at him proudly. “I’ll figure something out. I always do.” “That’s not good enough for my girl.” “Just tell me what you want. I’m tired. I want to go to bed.” He laughed, a low rumble in his chest. “You are about to get your wish.” He grabbed my arm and pulled me into the street. A car

was waiting. It was high class. Not normal for the neighborhood. I should have spotted it. I could have run. “What?” “I’m taking you to bed.”

Chapter Twenty One James

I sat in the chair by the window, waiting. The shower water was still going. She’d been in there for a while. I smirked. If she thought she was going to avoid paying the piper, she had another thing coming. I had waited long enough. I could wait a little bit longer. Finally Nadine came out. She looked scrubbed clean, fresh and glowing. She ran a towel over her hair and smiled at me sheepishly. She looked a little nervous. Good. That was good. She had reason to be. I stood up and walked over to her, smiling reassuringly. “James…” I tilted my head, waiting. “I just wanted to say that… I’m sorry.”

I watched her squirm, not saying a thing. “I felt awful. I was worried about you and-“ “I forgive you.” I reached for her. “Just never do it again.” She exhaled a sigh of relief and nodded happily. I almost felt guilty about what I was about to do.

Almost. “Hand me your belt please.” She blinked at me, not understanding. She shrugged and pulled the belt loose, handing it to me. I walked around her, pulling the other robe out of the closet. I tugged the belt loose and threw the robe on a chair. “I specifically asked for a room with a sturdy bed frame. I called three hotels before I found one.” She was staring at me, clutching her robe shut. Her eyes were wide. She was starting to get the picture. “Here’s how this is going to go.” She swallowed. I stared at her throat. I thought about biting it. I wanted to mark her with love bites all over her body. I wanted to make her know in her skin that she was mine. Fuck that, I wanted her to know in her bones. “I’m going to tie you up. You are going to lay still while I do it. And then I’m going to do whatever I want to you.” She was breathing heavily. I smiled. “And then we are going to talk.” “Talk?”

“Not before. After.” I smirked. “After round one. Or two. Maybe three.” “Oh.” “Your robe please.” She slid it off and handed it to me. I thanked her and put it aside. She stood there, so naked and beautiful that it made me ache. She looked nervous as I lifted her up and lay her down on the bed. She didn’t resist as I tied one slender wrist to the bed post. Then the other. I reached down and pulled off my belt. I used it on her right foot. Then I went to my luggage and removed the shoulder strap. That went around her left foot. I sat back and admired my handy work. She was spread eagle, naked, on the bed. Helpless. I could do whatever I waned to. And she couldn’t fight me. She couldn’t run. I’d make sure she didn’t want to. All the times I’d missed her. All the times I’d wanted her. All the times I’d been afraid out of my mind. In this moment, I was in control. I rubbed my hands together and got started. First I decided to get my clothes out of the way. I was already rock hard. I kicked my shoes off and stripped. When I was nude I looked up at her. She looked fucking terrified. I was by her side in a minute. I didn’t want to untie her but I would if she was really scared.

“Nadine?” She didn’t say anything. “Honey I’m not going to hurt you.” “I know.” “What are you so afraid of?” “I’m afraid to… feel.” Her admission broke my heart. I knew just what she meant. She was afraid I was going to break her barriers down. Burn those thick walls down with this crazy passion we had between us. Which is exactly what I was planning to do. I realized her whole life had been spent protecting herself. It was going to take her a while to let all those walls down once and for all. I could be patient. But it didn’t mean I wasn’t going to go ahead with my plans for tonight. Or the rest of our fucking lives. “It’s okay Deanie. I’m here with you. I’m not going anywhere. I’m just going… play.” I let my hands skim lightly over her body. She gulped and I almost laughed. She wasn’t afraid now though. Now she was squirming a little bit. Soon she’d be squirming a lot. I licked the taut line of her throat, chuckling at the sexy little sound she made. She sounded like a kitten. A soft, mewling kitten. And that was before I started in on the rest of her. I ran my fingers over her silky skin, just grazing her breasts. I knew exactly how to drive her crazy. And that’s what I was going to do.

Even if it drove me crazy along with her. I held myself above her, dipping my body down so I slid against her. My chest brushed against her nipples. My cock slid against her pussy lips and up over her belly. With each dip, I kissed her. Just a little, just enough so that she lifted her head to try and follow me. I chuckled and lowered myself between her thighs. Slowly, I began to nibble and taste those soft pouty lips. I teased her, tracing the line without pressing my tongue all the way in. Again and again I tasted her, not hard, but not stopping. “James!” Her hips rocked uselessly against my tongue and I pulled back, blowing cool air on her soaking wet pussy. Then I started again. Over and over I brought her to the brink, then stopped, letting her cool down. But just a little… each time she got more and more aroused. More frustrated. More desperate. “Please!” She was begging now. Good. I felt my cock straining to be let loose. I knelt beside her, stroking my shaft. Letting her see my pleasure. Her eyes were glued to my cock. I saw her lick her lips and I groaned. I let her have a taste and closed my eyes as her tongue swirled over my tip. But then I pulled away, wagging my finger at her. “Uh uh huh.” “James…”

I lay beside her, touching her at will. She could do nothing but moan and whimper. Sexy little whimpers that made my cock lurch towards her. “Do you want me?” “Yes!” “Are you going to run away again?” “No- I swear! I won’t!” I lay the palm of my hand on her lower belly. “I don’t believe you. What kind of reassurance will you give me?” “My word. Anything. Please, James!” I lifted myself above her, rubbing the tip of my cock over her slippery pussy lips. “Tell me.” “I won’t run.” “Tell me who you belong to.” “You! I belong to you. Please…” I let the tip of my cock slip inside her. I’d been waiting so long, that it felt like I was being burned by the sun. But in a good way. A very, very good way. “For how long?” I made lazy little circles with my hips, moving in and out of her a few inches. She moaned. “What?” “How long do you belong to me?” She looked confused, frustrated and sexy as hell. “As- as long as you want me to.” I smiled at her, letting my cock sink slowly into her

welcoming heat. “Unfff… that’s good Nadine.” “Oh!” “Because I want forever.” I doubted she heard me as I worked my cock inside her. I was relentless now, not holding back. I felt my cock expanding, ready to unleash. But I wanted this to last. Then again, she was tied to a bed… I bellowed as my seed exploded from my cock head. I drove forward again and again. She was cuming too, milking me relentlessly with her hot box. Together, we thrashed on the bed until we slowly came to a stop. I leaned my forehead against her, staring down at her beautiful face. She was staring at me with a mix of wonder and reproach. I knew she was annoyed at how long I’d made her wait. She had no idea what I had planned for the rest of the night. “James?” “Yes sweetheart?” “Are we going to talk now?” I shook my head slowly. “Will you untie me?” Again, I shook my head slowly. That’s when she realized I was hard again. Still inside her and ready for round two. “I told you it was going to me a long night.”

Nadine

My head tossed from side to side as James drove me to yet another earth shattering orgasm. He was above me, slowly fucking me into a trance like state. I could barely feel my wrists or ankles. That didn’t matter. The rest of my body was more than making up for it. James was making sure of that. Before he wouldn’t let me cum. Now he wouldn’t let me stop. He froze above me, letting my body clench down on his cock where it impaled me, unmoving. It made the orgasm more intense somehow… it seemed to go on endlessly. I could feel everything. So could he apparently. “Unnfff… yes Nadine… come for me… that’s a good girl… fuck you feel so good on my cock…” He waited until I was done before he started fucking me again. “God, I want to flip you over. Do all sorts of filthy things to you.” I moaned incoherently.

“Untie me.” He grinned down at me arrogantly. “Not until round three. Maybe.” His pace seemed unhurried as he fucked me. It was torture. He started withdrawing almost completely, then pausing before he thrust back in again. If I could just lift my legs… I could wrap them around him, keeping him inside me. Then he wouldn’t be so fucking smug. He pulled away again and I jerked my hips upward. He moaned and plunged back inside me. I whispered in his ear. “Come for me James.” He growled, and started pumping himself into my body. Faster. Harder. Deeper. Just like that, I’d sent him over the edge. His face scrunched up as I felt his cock lurch inside me. I exhaled and my body rose up, shuddering right along with him. It was like his dick let out electric currents as he came. Current that were just for me. It felt fucking amazing. He collapsed on top of me. But as always, he was careful not to crush me. No matter how spent he was. I turned my head, staring at his bulging arm muscles. I wanted to bite them. I could almost taste the salty sweat on his skin. I was starving I realized. “I’m hungry.” He lifted his head and looked at me.

“There’s plenty more where that came from. Give me a minute- no- less. Thirty seconds.” I shook my head. I was ravenous. And I could feel his cock refilling with blood again. “No, seriously. I didn’t eat all day. Untie me James.” He sighed and nodded, untying my ankles first. He rubbed the spots where the binds had left a mark, kissing the red skin. He did the same with my wrists. I sat up when the last one was untied. He kissed my wrist and pulled me into his arms. “I only untied you because you already said yes, you know.” “I know.” “It doesn’t mean I’m not going to tie you up again. So don’t get too comfy.” I smacked his shoulder and he laughed. “Room service. Now.” “Yes m’am.” I threw a pillow at him and got up, pulling on my robe. He pouted but I didn’t care. I just wanted to eat. Ten minutes later I was speed eating a veggie burger while he devoured his roasted chicken. Scratch that. He devoured two. It wouldn’t be easy feeding a big man like him I realized. I froze, a french fry half way to my mouth. I was already thinking about the practicalities. Like it was a fact. Me. Him. Forever. “Did you mean it James?”

He lifted his head from his food. “That I’m going to tie you up again? Hell yes.” “No, that’s not what I meant.” He wiped his hands off and reached for me, pushing the rolling table aside. Before I could blink I was cradled on his lap. He brushed my hair over my shoulders. “I’m keeping you. Is that what you are asking?” I nodded, suddenly feeling very shy. “You are coming with me to Miami. Starting fresh.” I opened my mouth and stared at him. “I took the job. With one provision. That they get your credits transferred to the University of Miami.” Now my jaw was wide open. He’d done all that? For me? Maybe he did really love me after all. “Alright?” I snuggled into his chest. His arms tightened around me. “Alright.”

Chapter Twenty Two James

It was a beautiful fucking day in Miami. I stood on the balcony of my new condo. Not mine.

Ours. It had three bedrooms, two baths, a huge kitchen and a view of the bay. I’d put Deanie on the deed. She didn’t know it yet though. I was going to surprise her. And that wasn’t the only surprise I had in store for my girl… I was going to do everything and anything I could do to make her feel safe and loved. She already knew I wanted her. Now she was going to know how much more it was than that. “Are you ready?” I turned and my breath caught in my throat. I couldn’t even speak for a minute. She looked like a super model. She was dressed to the nines. Her hair was blown out.

She’d even put on a little bit of makeup. It had only been two weeks since we got here but so much had changed. Nadine had changed. She was relaxing. Slowly, but I could see it. Feel it, just from being around her. And I loved it. I’d taken her shopping. For furniture. Clothes. Everything. She’d let me dress her like a little doll. Sexy, silky dresses, tight jeans, lingerie, bikini’s, high heels. At the moment I was paying the price for it. We were supposed to go to lunch at the club house. Another perk of being on the team was membership to a number of places, including one of the social clubs down by the water. They just sent this shit to my house. Boom, you’re a member. Invited. Accepted. Celebrated. Just for doing what I would have done anyway. Playing ball. Nadine was wearing a black bikini with a sheer black kimono style cover up. Her pretty little feet were wrapped in high heel sandals that wrapped up her slender calves. She was tan, her skin lightly oiled. She was glowing. She was fucking perfect. I swallowed and shook my head. “No.” She frowned at me, looking confused. “What do you mean ‘no’?” I pulled her against me.

“I mean, I can think of better things to do.” “James!” She squealed as I scooped her up into my arms. “What are you doing?” “What do you think I’m doing?” I carried her into the bedroom and lowered her onto the bed. “James… we said we’d be there.” “They can wait.” She sighed as I eased my body on top of hers. “You can’t insist on dressing me up and do this every time!” She had a point. I was having a hard time adjusting to her new wardrobe, even though I’d picked it all out. Or maybe it was because I’d picked it all out… Either way, it was going to take time for me to get used to it. My cock probably never would. I unwrapped the bikini strings and pulled them loose, kissing and stroking her as I went. She sighed contentedly. I knew how to make my kitty purr. “I’ll make you a deal.” She smiled at me, clearly not minding that I was making us late. “You can leave your shoes on.” I didn’t waste time, heading straight down her body until I was between her thighs, face to face with her sweet little box. My cock bobbed against my stomach and I pulled my swim shorts off, reaching down to tug on the tip. I went to town on her, thrusting my tongue inside her to make sure

she was ready. Hmmmfff…. She was slick and dewy inside. Her sweet and salty taste coating my tongue. I growled and positioned my cock at her entrance. I couldn’t wait another minute. Pressing forward in one long stroke, I was embedded inside her minutes from seeing her on the balcony. I was going to like living with my woman.

I was going to like it a lot. She was writhing beneath me as I rode her. Neither of us held back. She was making those wild little sounds she made just before she came. I felt her bearing down on me and I groaned, my cum spurting deep inside her. Every time I came with her felt stronger than the last time. I bucked my hips wildly as I unloaded into her womb. I felt an overwhelming desire to make a baby with her. I wanted to do everything with her. We collapsed on the bed, both of us spent. I pulled her against me and kissed her softly. My hands found her bottom and squeezed. She felt so good in my hands. I never wanted to let go. “Uh oh.” I smiled at her, raising an eyebrow. “What?” She looked up at me and then down between our bodies. I was getting hard again.

Nadine

I sat gingerly on the lounge chair, smiling at some of the other players and their girlfriends and wives. It was a strange, glittering world of excess I’d stepped into. I wasn’t sure I liked it yet. But James said we could do what we wanted. We didn’t need to buy into it. We didn’t need to hire a maid or get a limo. We could be more than comfortable without all that. As long as I didn’t mind wearing the expensive clothes he picked out for me. That he had been quite insistent about. I smiled, staring at the glittering emerald bracelet he’d given me before leaving the house. We’d been more than a little late. He’d taken me twice before letting me clean up and put my bikini back on. I didn’t mind though. The second time he’d let me be on top. Then he’d surprised me with a jewelry box. A matching set of emerald earrings, bracelet and necklace. It was extravagant to say the least.

I’d been so touched, so overwhelmed that I hadn’t even thanked him until we were halfway to the club. He’d just smiled and told me to thank him later. I knew exactly what he meant by that. It was funny, the way he could still make me blush. James came over, carrying a drink for me. He watched me like a hawk, refusing to let me get my own drinks or lift a finger. He handed me a fruity cocktail and I took a sip. “Thank you.” He grinned at me and opened his mouth. “I know, I know, I can thank you later right?” He winked at me and fell into easy conversation with the other couples surrounding us. A few of the players had brought their families. Little kids were running around. It was nice. Everyone had opened us with open arms. It was more than I’d expected. I’d thought I’d be relegated to the side lines. Alone. Bored until school started. Instead I’d been busy. I’d set up the apartment with James’s approval. He’d even insisted that I set up a corner of the office with art supplies. I hadn’t even realized that he knew I liked to draw, or that I was any good at it. He’d even talked me into looking into design school instead of getting a regular degree. I was seriously considering it. His mom was in the sister condo next door. I met her down by the pool almost every day for lunch. Some women might have minded, but I loved Mrs. Fitzgerald. Way more than I loved my own mother.

Not that that was saying much. I watched as people came and went. So many eyes were on us at all times at these events. It was strange. I was getting lots of attention myself, but it was James who was the star of the show. Women openly flirted with him in front of me. I didn’t really care. I knew he was too exhausted to do a damn thing about it. I’d just have to keep him satisfied. And drained. That shouldn’t be too hard. Even now, he was constantly touching me. Wanting to be close to me. I smiled and sipped my drink. Life was good. For the first time ever, it was really and truly good.

Chapter Twenty Three James

The music was pounding as a girl in a slinky dress refreshed our drinks. Bottle service in Miami was very, very different than going out with the team back home. This was a whole other level. There were more scantily clad women than there had ever been in the strip club. They were everywhere. All different kinds. I barely even noticed. My teammates on the other hand were all over that shit. I checked my phone again and Bronx, the linebacker from New York laughed at me. “Man, you pussy whipped!” I shrugged. So what if I was? “She’s supposed to be here by now.” “You invited your girl? Man, she will never let you out of her sight once she sees all these chicks on your joint.” “She’s not like that.” “Whatever man.” He leaned back and with in a minute there were two girls

cuddling up to him. I waved another girl off when she tried to sit with me. “Seats taken.” She pouted and wandered off to find a more willing victim. I shook my head. The women here were like piranhas. My phone vibrated in my hand.

Be there in ten. I smiled, eager to see Nadine in the outfit I’d picked out for her. She’d been at the University, checking out the design department. A change in majors would mean an extra semester but that was fine. We had the time. And we sure as shit had the money. I’d left the ensemble on the bed. A tight micro mini-skirt and a silky top that slid off the shoulders. No bra. I grinned, wondering if she’d go for it. Not that it would be out of place here, but my Deanie could be modest. I was working on fixing that.

It’s a zoo in here, make sure I know you are here so I can come get you. I sat back and downed my vodka tonic. I hadn’t let loose in a long time. I felt good. Ready for my first game next week. The guys apparently had a strict ‘allowed to party’

schedule. And they abided by it. That included dragging me out for boys night. I didn’t care though. Fuck if I was leaving my girl home alone. Everything was more fun with her around. Plus I’d rented a limo. I had plans for the ride home. I’d never done it in a moving vehicle before. I could hardly wait.

Nadine

I stood in the foyer, trying to figure out how to make my way to the VIP area. The joint was jumping, to say the least. I tugged my skirt down but it was useless. I was barely covered. I’d have to keep my legs crossed all night or I’d give the whole room a show. A very, very naughty show. But James had picked out my outfit. I’d promised to play along with his little game. And he hadn’t laid out panties. So, here I was, commando. No bra either. It felt naughty. I kind of liked it. I tapped on a bouncers shoulder. “Where’s the team? I’m supposed to meet my boyfriend.” He jerked his head across the club. “VIP. You’ll never get in. They have enough girls already.” “I’m his girlfriend.” He shrugged, unimpressed. “Whatever.” I pulled out my phone and texted James. Before I could

hit send, someone slammed into me and my phone went sliding across the floor. It was gone instantly, swallowed up by the crowd on the dance floor.

Great. I just had to do this the old fashioned way. Slowly I edged my way through the crowd. Guys tried to talk to me but I ignored them. Up ahead I could see the VIP section. It was raised and lit better than the rest of the club. So I could see James. But he couldn’t see me. The bouncer hadn’t been exaggerating. There were girls everywhere up there. They made my outfit look modest. I froze as a girl slid across the couch where James was sitting to whisper in his ear. She was hot. Extremely hot. Long dark hair, like mine. Her tits were huge too. And she was wearing little more than a bandage over them. I watched as James laughed and shook his head. The girl twirled her hair coyly. He shook his head again and she tottered off on those impossibly high heels. He didn’t watch her walk away though. He was looking at his phone. Good boy.

Very, very good boy. I made my way to the entrance to the VIP room. As predicted, the bouncer didn’t even acknowledge me. But James was scanning the crowd. He saw me almost right away. He waved and came to get me.

“She’s with me.” The velvet rope was lifted immediately. James kissed me deeply and led me over to hang with the guys. I noticed a few of them weren’t meeting my eyes. Probably because they were with other girls. Girls who were definitely not their wives or girlfriends. I felt a little sick at seeing how easy it was for them. The girl with dark hair was glaring at me. I sipped the drink that James made for me and pointed her out to him. “Making new friends?” He was staring at my legs. “What?” “That girl. I saw her talking to you.” He laughed. “Fuck, you look hot. Uh, yeah the girls around here are a little pushy. I don’t like it.” “You better not.” He looked at me, belatedly realizing he was on thin ice. “Nadine. Do you honestly think I would play you?” I smiled, shaking my head. “I don’t actually. That’s why I’m going to reward you. And make sure you stay on a short leash.” His mouth opened and his eyes glazed over. “What? When?” “As soon as we leave.” He stood up and practically carried me out of the club without saying goodbye to anyone. As we left the club I handed my drink to the bouncer who’d told me I wouldn’t

get into the VIP section. I winked. James hadn’t even let me take more than a sip of it. Once we got into the limo he was all over me. Kissing me, feeling me up, pressing me back into the seat. “James.” “Hmmfff… you look so fucking good Nadine… I wanna…” “James.” He stopped kissing me, finally noticing the tone of my voice. “Do you want your reward or not?” He nodded eagerly. “Then be a good boy and sit up.” He sat up and stared at me. Waiting. Not very patiently. I smiled slowly and reached across the seat. My hands stroked his body through his clothes. Up and down his thighs. Over his cock, making him moan. Up and over his chest. I reached down and showed him that I wasn’t wearing any panties. He groaned and reached for me. “Uh uh uh. No touching till I say so.” He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, nodding. I straddled him, my pussy pressed against his hard-on. Then I started to move. He reached for my hips and I slapped his hand. He reached for my breasts and I slapped his hand again. Finally he stopped and I nodded my approval, sliding down his body to rest between his thighs. He was entirely focused on me as I rubbed his cock

through his pants, licking my lips. Then I reached for the zipper. “Sir? We are here.” James groaned in frustration. I laughed as he handed the driver a huge tip. He practically ran through the lobby to the elevator bay, dragging me with him. Once we were alone in the elevator he started kissing me, running his hands up and down my body. “Fuck Nadine, you really didn’t wear panties out.” “I did what you told me to. Now you are going to do what I tell you to do.” He nodded, his breath coming hard and fast. I smiled and crooked my finger as we walked down the hallway. He looked like he was out of his mind. It was funny. He had no idea what was in store for him. “Bedroom, now.” He led the way, not speaking. Just obeying. I liked being in control. It was so different than usual. And I was planning to make the most of it. He stared at me as I walked around the sturdy wood and iron bed frame. “I went to three different furniture stores before I found a bed strong enough.” His eyes widened. His mouth opened. I actually saw his cock twitch in his pants. “Strip.” He took off his clothes so fast I would have missed it if I blinked. I smiled, walking around him. I traced the outline of the muscles on his lower back and then smacked his ass.

Hard. Hmmm, he had a nice ass. “Lay down.” Again, he did as I said. You would think a big guy like him would have trouble moving that quickly. But he was like lightning. One by one, I tied his limbs to the posts of the California King sized bed. He kept his eyes on me the whole time, utterly transfixed. I stared down at him, my big, handsome, helpless man. And then I got to work.

Chapter Twenty Four James

I pulled against the straps holding me down. I could move, but just a little bit. Nadine was standing at the foot of the bed looking like an avenging angel. My angel. I watched as she pulled her top off and her glorious breasts came into view. Then she slid her little mini skirt down over her hips. There she was, all long legs and delicious curves. Sheer perfection. And she was all mine. I just had no idea what she had in store for me. She tossed her hair over her shoulder and started climbing up my body. Her fingernails traced up and down my thighs, coming closer and closer to my cock without touching it. “Nadine… oh God please Nadine…” She flipped her hair over so that it landed on my stomach. Then she backed away, letting the silky strands

caress my cock and balls. I groaned at the sensation. She did it a few more times until I was rocking my hips, fucking the empty air. She disappeared into the kitchen. I did my best to get ahold of myself. It didn’t work. When she came back she had two cups. One had steaming hot liquid in it. The other had ice. She lifted them one a time, considering. First she picked an ice cube and plopped it into her mouth. All the sudden I knew what was coming. I knew it as she climbed up my body. She bent her head and her ice cold lips wrapped around my cock. I jerked against my bonds, moaning. Her tongue flicked against the tip again and again. She traced the edge of my cock head, then took me further into her mouth. For a relative beginner in the blow job department, she was proving to be a natural at this. Fuck, she was better than a natural. She was a fucking prodigy. She lifted her head up and smiled at me. It wasn’t a nice smile. It was a smile of pure evil. I groaned as she stood up and slowly took a sip of the steaming hot tea. Then she was back, enveloping my cock in her blazing hot lips.

Oh God. I groaned, rotating my hips upward. Hoping she would take pity on me and go faster, harder. But she continued the same slow, teasing pace. Her nails scraped along my thighs and belly, again and again, making me even more

sensitive to each touch. She took me further down her throat this time and I whimpered like a wounded animal. A tiger. No. A wolf. She disappeared to get more ice and then began again. This continued for what felt like hours. Days. I bucked my hips every time she pulled away, my cock bobbing uselessly in the air. Finally she seemed to take pity on me. She straddled me, her bare pussy pressing down on my belly. Then she bent down and kissed me. Just for a moment. Then my torture began in earnest.

Nadine

I lowered my breasts to his lips, letting him suck on my nipples for a moment. One and then then other. He was frantic, his lips and tongue slathering me desperately. His head lifted as he strained to get closer. I pulled back and raised my hips, letting him do the same to my pussy. He licked it for all he was worth. I grabbed the headboard as he started to drive me wild. It felt so good when he touched me like that. But tonight was about him. I needed to keep control. I slid backward and positioned myself over his cock. I slid back and forth, rubbing my soaking wet pussy on him. He groaned and tried to lift his hips. I knew he wanted to push inside me. I wanted it too. But not quite yet… I had to make sure he understood. Again and again I let him lick me, keeping me nice and slippery. Then I would continue my teasing, wiggling on him provocatively, playing with my tits for him while he whimpered. It had been well over an hour when I decided to take pity

on him. I grabbed his cock. I held it firmly as I sank down on it slowly. We both moaned in unison as I landed on his stomach, my legs spread wide open by his hips. I lifted myself almost completely off of him. He whimpered again, begging me with his eyes. “Nadine…” I sank down again. For a long time I rode him slowly. A nice long pause between each thrust seeming like I might stop, might pull away. He was flat out begging me now, trying to negotiate. “I’ll buy you a new car.” I just smiled. “I already have a new car.” “A dog. A pony. Anything.” “I don’t need anything.” “Please Nadine. Oh GOD!” I slammed down on him a bit harder this time. Then I thought about taking a break. Maybe getting the ice out again. That’s when I heard it.

Riipppppppp. RIPPPPPPPPP. RIPPPPPPPPPPP. Suddenly I was on my back, James had one thigh in each hand. He drove into me again and again. It took me a minute to figure out what had happened. He’d freed himself.

He’d actually torn through the nylon straps. My man was that strong. His need for me was that intense. It filled me with wonder. Then I stopped thinking at all. I came almost instantly. My pussy was under assault as he fucked me harder than he’d ever fucked me before. He jerked above me, cuming with me. But he didn’t stop. He kept thrusting. “What are you-“ “You think I’m done after that buildup? You’ve been a bad girl Nadine, and now it’s time to take your medicine.” He flipped me over and pushed his way inside me again. He had cum. But he was still hard. Suddenly I realized I was in trouble. Uh oh… He grabbed my hair and tugged my head back gently. His teeth grazed my shoulder as he nipped me. “You are going to pay for that you know.” I gasped. “I know.” I looked over my shoulder at him. “But it was worth it.”

Six Months Later James

I lit another candle, shooing the cat away. Tonight was the night. Everything had to be perfect. Tonight I was asking Nadine to be my wife. I’d hinted at it time and time again. She’d said nothing, just shrugged coyly. I wasn’t entirely sure she was going to say yes. I’d asked her to go off birth control too. She’d just smiled at me. She was still wild. Still not entirely mine. It drove me crazy. I loved it.

I loved her. She still hadn’t said that either. Not since that night at the hospital. I said it plenty. I said it every time we made love. I couldn’t help it. It was like she pulled it out of me each

time I came. The words tore out, even if I didn’t want them to. Nadine walked in from her class and froze. Her eyes were wide as she took in the preparations I’d made. Candles, check. Champagne, check. Softly playing music, check. Rose petals everywhere, check. Cat threatening to knock over candles at any given moment, check. She looked… disappointed. “Nadine? Are you alright?” Her eyes were filled with tears. My heart started thudding. This was not going according to plan. She looked at me, her brow furrowed. “You knew? My surprise is ruined.” “Knew what?” “You don’t know? What is all this then?” Now it was my turn to be surprised. “You can’t tell Nadine? Maybe this will help.” I knelt down in front of her. Her hand lifted to her chest. I pulled out the huge diamond ring I had bought her months before, taking her hand. I’d kept it hidden, waiting for the right moment. Waiting until I just had to ask. “Nadine, will you do me the honor of becoming my wife? I love you so much and want you to take my name and be by my side, always.” She stared at me in awe. She hadn’t known. She also didn’t look disappointed.

“Oh James.” I tried to joke but I felt like the floor was going to open up and swallow me if she didn’t say yes. I didn’t know what I would do. I smiled crookedly at her. “Is that a yes?” “Yes! Oh James. Yes, yes, yes.” I pulled her into my arms and kissed her, slipping the ring on. She barely glanced at it. Her eyes were on me. She kissed me again and again, telling me how much she loved me. It was just what I wanted to hear. It completely distracted me from the other question I’d wanted to ask her. “What was your surprise Nadine?” She was crying and laughing at the same time as she ran to get her bag. She walked back to me slowly, with something hidden behind her back. She handed it to me. It was a small and hard and wrapped in a piece of light blue tissue paper. I looked at her, not understanding. “Open it silly.” I raised my eyebrow at her. “You will address me as ‘Husband’ or “Master’.” She laughed as I opened the package. “There’s another name I will be calling you soon.” I stared down at the tiny silver rattle in my hand. A rattle? I looked up at her, realization slowly dawning. “What’s that?”

“Father.”

Afterword Thank you for reading PLAYER! If you enjoyed this book please let me know on Amazon and Goodreads! You can reach me on Facebook, Twitter, or you can email me at: [email protected] Credits: Kruse Images & Photography Rebel Edit & Design Lance Jones Model One More Page Book Promotions Breathless Book Promotions Pincushion Press Other works by Joanna Blake: Wanted By The Devil (Devil’s Riders MC Club) Still Waters (Devil’s Riders MC Club) Safe In His Arms (Devil’s Riders MC

Club) Devil’s Riders: Before You (A prequel to the Devil’s Rider’s Trilogy) Slay Me (Rock Gods) Dare Me (Rock Gods) Cover Me (Rock Gods) Ride With Me (The Delancey Brothers) BRO’ A Bad Boy For Summer Turn the page for an excerpt on Joanna Blake’s upcoming novel Bound To Me

Bound To Me Coming Soon From Joanna Blake

I pushed Jack Black to his limits, riding the stallion over the entire course. I did this nearly every morning now before his afternoon training session. Ever since the wild young horse had arrived. It kept him from injuring himself or the trainers. I was the only one the damn horse would listen to. I rode into the paddock and dismounted, tossing the reins to McDermott, the head stable master. “Your appointment is waiting for you Daniel.” He winked at me. “What appointment?” “She was supposed to be here last week, remember?” I cursed. A rich city girl was here to breed her horse with one of ours. She’d been carefully instructed that the sooner in the mare’s season she came, the better the chances that the mare would quicken. But the prearranged date had come and gone without a word. I’d had the staff call. I’d emailed. And then I’d written it off. I was inclined to ignore the matter entirely. Just to teach the lady a lesson in manners. Leave the horse unbred. But I couldn’t. Jackson had personally tasked me with this client.

Damnit. “Personally, I’d say she was worth the wait.” I glanced at McDermott sardonically. “The mare or the woman?” He chuckled.

“Both!” I smiled at his joke and patted Black Jack’s flank. “Cool him down and clean him off. It’s time for him to meet his first girlfriend” “What about you?” He gestured to my riding clothes. I’d been out for hours, sweating in the Texas sun. I looked down at myself. I pulled out a handkerchief and wiped my face. “That’s as good as the lady is going to get. Where is she?” “Where else? The stables.” I nodded. Where else indeed. Horse people were all the same. Even if they were God awful in human company. They all loved the majestic animals we cared for and made our living with with an intense fervor unmatched by other hobbyists. I strode into the massive stable building, eager to get this over with. The stables were L-shaped. She wasn’t in the first corridor so I turned the corner. And stopped in my tracks. Leaning against one of the stable doors was a tall, slender, very, very curvy woman. Her long blond hair was artfully arranged in luxurious waves. Her outrageously perfect bottom was encased in snug fitting riding pants. Her profile was one of classic beauty, with thickly lashed eyes, high cheek bones, a delicate nose and pouty lips. Did I mention the curves? Her entire bearing screamed old money, privilege and pride.

And stupidity. She was leaning against Thunderstorm’s stall. The one horse who’d been known to injure anyone who rode him. Or got close to his stall. The most dangerous horse in a hundred miles. “Back away very slowly.” Her head turned and she stared at me. Her eyes were wide as she took me in. For a moment she looked pleasantly surprised. And then disdain clouded her features. She looked me up and down, obviously confusing me for a stable hand. I’d been wrong. The woman wasn’t just a beauty. She was the beauty. The most beautiful woman I’d ever laid eyes on. I had one question answered. Her eyes were blue. And I knew one other thing for certain too. She was about to become a major pain in my ass.

BRO’ Joanna Blake

Not one for slacking I started my first full day home with a match with the club pro Matt. It cost extra to play with him but I didn’t care. He was an amazing player and gave as good as he got. And for some reason, he considered me a friend. Probably because most of the people who hired him were bored housewives hoping to get into his pants. I’d noticed the cougar crowd dropping me hints the past few years as well. And now that I was 21… well maybe I’d take one of them up on it. At least I could be sure an older woman would know what she was doing. I was dripping with sweat by the time we were done. I wasn’t a big fan of showering at the club so I left. Matt waved me off and begged me to book him as much as possible this summer. I promised I would. What the fuck else was I supposed to do? Except, well, fuck. As much as possible. As many girls as possible. Speaking of which maybe I’d text Jen later. I knew she was waiting on me. I did enjoy working out horizontally, especially with a sexy female like Jen. She liked to sport fuck as much as I did. I was turning down our driveway in my convertible when I hit the breaks. Hard. A girl was biking toward me. From the general direction of the house. Long dark blond hair blew behind. Big high tits filled out her t-shirt admirably. She had a teeny tiny waist

and long tanned legs. She rode closer and I tried to get a look at her face. Pretty, that much was obvious, with big beautiful eyes. I could see her puffy lips from twenty feet away. Cute little nose too. The girl looked like a God damned swimsuit model.

No. Wait. What. My brain went utterly blank as I realized something. It was Mouse. Mouse was the swim suit model. I was staring at Mouse with lust. Hot, unrelenting lust. I jolted to action as she pulled up by my car. “Nev?” She stopped her bike, those impossibly long legs straddling the seat. Her jean shorts were short, almost up to the top of her perfect thighs. I swallowed, realizing my mouth was a little bit dry. But my dick was throbbing. She smiled at me, cool as a cucumber. Where was the worshipful little Mouse I knew and loved? “Hey Clay.” She’d grown up obviously. And she’d grown up right. Still, I knew how to charm the pants off a girl, no matter how hot she was. And I wanted to. I knew it instantly. I wanted to fuck Mouse, of all people. Really, really bad. I smiled, letting my eyes wander over that ridiculously perfect little body.

“Where you going?” She tossed her head, sending a cascade of wavy blond hair over her shoulder. It was very sexy, but not deliberate or coy. She was unconsciously seductive. It was hypnotizing. “Job hunting.” I smirked. “In that outfit?” She looked down at herself and back at me. I pulled my sunglasses down and switched gears. “I think you’ve outgrown those shorts little Mouse.” Then I drove away. Slowly. Very slowly. Just so I could check out her ass in the rear view window. Good lord, the girl was fine. She’d stop traffic anywhere. No matter what she was wearing. I went into the house to change, all thoughts of texting Jen forgotten.

A Bad Boy For Summer Joanna Blake

I threw my arm over the back of the seat and looked to the side, letting my eyes slide over her body. Frannie didn’t seem to notice. Her hands were gripping the bar that had locked us into place in the Ferris wheel seat. I leaned back and watched her as the ride started to spin. She looked like a little kid, nervous and excited. Her cheeks were pink and her eyes sparkled when she turned to look at me. “I thought you didn’t like Ferris wheels.” “I don’t! I’m petrified.” I grinned at her. “I’ll protect you.” She laughed as if that were the wittiest thing I could have said. I laughed too, her laughter was that infectious. As soon as we got to the top of the wheel I slid over to her. Her face was startled as she looked into my eyes. My eyes lowered to her soft inviting lips. I leaned in and tilted my head, angling my mouth against hers. Her lips felt like pillows underneath mine. Warm and sweet. Her breath mingled with mine as I slowly eased into the kiss, nibbling and licking her until she opened her mouth. Then the kiss went wild. My hands reached for her hips as I pulled her against me. Her breasts mashed against my chest and I moaned, diving back into her mouth to tangle my tongue with hers. I felt like my dick was a fucking rocket, it was so ready to

lift off. The next thing I knew the ride had stopped and a crowd of people were staring at us. I guess we didn’t notice. I wanted the ride to go on and on. As it was I had to hold my jacket in front of me as I climbed out. I glanced at Frannie. Her pretty lips were swollen and pouting. I wanted to get horizontal with her right fucking now. Jesus Christ, what was she doing to me? The girl had the moves that was for fucking sure. I took her hand and pulled her toward the boardwalk, desperately looking for a place to be alone with her. She smiled at me shyly. There was an innocence in her gaze that made me absolutely sure that she had no fucking clue what I had in mind. I had a sinking feeling that Frannie was a good girl. That her innocence might be a problem. That it might take more than a Ferris wheel ride to get into her pants. It wasn’t going to stop me from trying though. I knew something else too. I knew it without a doubt. This girl was going to be mine.