(Ties #2) Severed Ties - J. L. Beck

Copyright Readers Note Dedication One Two Three

Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve Thirteen Fourteen Fifteen To Be Continued

Acknowledgments Project Killer & Project Rogue Teaser Worth the Chase

Copyright © J.L. Beck 2016 All rights reserved. Except as permitted by U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, no part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, or stored in a database or retrieval system, without prior permission of the author.

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establishments, or organizations, and incidents are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously to give a sense of authenticity. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental. Severed Ties is intended for 18+ older, and for mature audiences only. Editing and Interior Design:

Silla Webb Alpha Queens Book Obsession- Author Services Cover Design by Sprinkles on Top Stock Photography by Dollar Photo Club © JL Beck 2016

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Her heartbeat was still. Her life nothing but a memory to me. I was far from the man that I once was… Cold. Heartless. Emotionless. Those were all words that would describe me. I had loved two women in my life and lost both of them. I would never open up my heart again. I would simply avenge their deaths.

We had a bond. Ties to one another. Now I needed to do whatever I could to get back to Grayson, even if that meant coming face to face with my father and Drake. The ties that bind us needed to be severed if Grayson and I had a chance. I needed to save him, all while

trying to face my own demons.

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-D, you’ll always be my favorite. Keep your chin up!

Noise surrounded me, the brightness of light beamed on the other side of my eyelids. Forcing myself awake, I blinked my eyes open. I could hear my own shallow breaths. My own heart beat, even the gulp in my throat as I swallowed. I stared blankly at the wall before me. Every part of my body that

had flesh on it ached, my bones feeling as if they had been melted. I was alive, but at what cost? The memories of what occurred were muddled, like oil and water refusing to mix together. I knew my life had been saved and though I felt like hell right at this second, there was someone that I needed to be thanking. Then there was Grayson. The moment my body and mind disconnected, I knew I had lost him for good. After everything that had happened back at the loft, the things he said, the fact he had allowed them to take me. He thought I was dead; I was sure of it. “I’m sorry that it had to end that way.” A voice echoed through my thoughts. It was one I had heard before,

but I just couldn’t piece together the face that matched the voice. Almost immediately the calmness that encompassed me evaporated, fear filled my belly as my mind tried its hardest to place the voice with the face. Drake— or even worse— my father could be holding me again, ready to trap me within their clutches and keep me confined in their world. A world I successfully escaped from once. Could I be so lucky the second time around? “End what way?” I asked, my lips trembling. My throat was raw, my voice weak. I still couldn’t move my legs, arms, or hands and that scared me more than anything. Was I paralyzed? Would I be forced to live the rest of my

life seated in a wheelchair or lying down in a bed while Drake and my dad tortured my mind and scarred my heart? “I know how you and Grayson felt about each other, or at least I knew how you felt about each other; though I’m sure things haven’t changed in the last 48 hours?” He chuckled. Time seemed to stop as his laugh met my ears. Drake never laughed, and when he did it caused my stomach to churn and acid to climb my throat because something bad always accompanied that man's laugh. Except the one that I heard was warm. Like a blanket covering your body after spending all day out in the cold. It was the kind of laugh that made you want to smile and laugh right along

with him. It was then that I knew I shouldn’t be afraid. Instead I tried to dig through the haze called my memory but came up empty. Every thought was like quicksand. The second I grasped what it was that I wanted was the same second it sank deep into the sand. “My body…” I heaved out. My chest was hurting like the weight of a thousand bricks sat upon it, and my mind was racing. “The medicine will be wearing off very soon.” A warm hand landed against my temple and skated down onto my shoulder. I knew that after everything I had been through in my life I should’ve been afraid of this man, afraid of being killed, except for some

unknown reason I wasn’t. I felt safe, even without control of my own body. “What’s going to happen to me?” I had to ask the question, it was pounding against my skull waiting to be answered. “Well, sunshine…” There was a moment of silence. The smell of cologne hit me right in my senses and with it came the memory of the person who wore it. A smile that frightened and warmed me at the same time. A large body, that of an NFL linebacker. His eyes, full of secrets that I knew I would never understand, and the very first time I met him—in those eyes I knew he wanted me dead. He was handsome with

his dark blond hair and forest green eyes. He had the stealth to kill and seemed unaffected by doing so. Yet he was nothing compared to the man I thought I meant something to—Grayson. My heart sped up at the presence of his name in my own thoughts, right before my mind went to the words he had said last. How he had used me for nothing more than a good time. Fire burned deep inside my chest. It couldn’t be true. It couldn’t. Or maybe it could be and I just didn't want to accept that for the third time— to the third man—I had been only a game piece. “Tuck?” His name fell from my lips like a saving grace. I couldn’t remember Tuck being there with me

when Drake slammed me against the wall. I focused all my willpower on that very moment my back hit the hardness of the wall. Was it really him, or was my imagination playing tricks on me? “Welcome back to Earth. If by Tuck you mean your Knight in Shining Armor, then yes that would be me, love.” Tuck’s words were smooth, cocky, and fluid. He was far more upbeat than I expected, which lead me to my next set of questions. “Where are we? What happened, and where is Grayson?” I was finally able to focus on his face as I blinked my eyes a few times—ignoring the fact that they felt as heavy as boulders—my only concern being to see

him. “Whoa, slow it down and ask one question at a time please. My little mind can’t keep up.” He smirked at me, another chuckle escaping his mouth. Tuck looked far better than I did. I noticed as my eyes took him in before coming to my own body for assessment. A sheet covered me from the chest down, and I knew from looking at the small pieces of flesh that weren’t covered by the fabric that I had major bruising. No wonder I felt like I had been hit by an eighteen wheeler. “What happened, Tuck? The last thing I remember is Drake, and he was…” I trailed off. I didn't want to finish that thought. I couldn’t.

Seconds turned into minutes and slowly ticked away as Tuck slid his hand through his hair in frustration. “Out with it, Tuck, just tell me! Don’t sugar coat the bullshit called my life. I’ve been dealt a shitty hand many a times. I can handle it.” My lip trembled, emotions I wasn’t sure why I was feeling swarmed me. I had never stopped to cry about things that were happening to me. You learned to deal with the ugly in your life, as if it was a permanent fixture when it seemed to happen repeatedly. I simply ran and hid from everything; the tears would come later. After all, running was all I was good at. But as I lay here unable to

move, I couldn't help but experience everything I was feeling and all at once. Running wasn’t an option when you couldn’t get your limbs to move. “Shit went down. My cover was almost blown, and seeing what Drake was doing to you caused my fucking skin to burn. I had to end that fucker, or at least try. Unfortunately, I didn’t get to. I did get to save your life though,” Tuck responded, his voice dark at his mention of Drake. “Cover?” I questioned. What was he saying, did he mean that he was an undercover officer? “Yes, cover. I'm an agent. I’ve been undercover for awhile now. The NYPD had me step in years ago.

Girls were disappearing left and right. We knew something was going down but had no idea what it was. After four or five dead bodies showed up, the agency decided that it was time to see who it was that was killing these women. I stumbled across your father, as far as he knows. To the department it was a set up to get me in with him. Since then I’ve been there, piecing the puzzle together so we could have a solid case. Your dad is always so careful. He rarely gets his hands dirty even though they’re covered in filth, which makes it hard to pin evidence on him.” He paused before speaking again, as if he had to gather his thoughts. “I ended up getting way too

close to Grayson in the process, which comprised everything we all had worked for. We aren't supposed to grow emotional bonds with anyone while undercover, because we need to be able to make quick decisions without our emotions being a part of them. People are prone to make rash choices when it involves someone they care for. Hence me saving you. Grayson has become a brother to me. I knew I had to save you, at the very least for him, if not for my own moral values. I had to intervene. There was no way I couldn’t do everything in my power not to protect you from your father and Drake. Not after years of watching you on the run.” My heart seemed to skip a

beat, my stomach quivered, and bile rose in my throat. The police were after my father and Drake? It wasn’t hard for me to believe, the fact that I was now in the custody of the police department maybe even worse—the FBI—now that was. “How? I mean I don’t understand how this all has been hidden. Does Grayson know where we are and what’s happening? Does he know about you? What about the things he told the other guys about me?” I asked nervously. Anxiety filled my belly as my level of panic started to rise. I felt as if I was drowning, one more gulp of water away from death. Movement was slowly starting to come back to my limbs, and I was on the verge of passing out—the

emotions and revelations finally starting to settle in. “Ellie, breathe. In and out. Slow deep breaths.” Tuck’s voice was soft, as his breath fell against my face. I stared at him, trying to focus on his words. Trying to focus on anything. My body was battered, my mind was bruised, and my emotions were all over the place. Yet my heart was burning like a raging inferno. “Any fool could look at Grayson and tell there is a connection between you and him. You have to believe that. You have to know that he would tell them anything they wanted to hear if it meant saving your life. Even if he hurt you in the process. That's the type

of man he is. But to answer your other questions, Grayson knows nothing yet, and until you are healed he will know nothing. As far as he is concerned-you're dead.” Tuck’s voice was stern, and his eyes said he wouldn’t change his mind. I bit the inside of my lip and let the pain encompass me. The copper taste of blood filled my mouth and a need for vengeance blanketed my whole body. If Grayson thought I was dead, I knew he believed deep down inside himself that he was the cause for my death. That once again he had failed a woman he cared for deeply. How could I have been so blind? To believe, even for a second that those words he spoke to me were true. He shared parts of himself with me, his

past. His sister. He wouldn't have if he didn't feel what I felt for him for me. I close my eyes and give in to the heaviness of them with only one thought on my mind. Not only would I end my father and Drake for myself, but for Grayson and his sister.

With her death everything changed. A gaping hole had formed in my chest, the scars of losing my sister started to rip open, the stitches being pulled away at the seams. The blood from the wound seeping out like someone had cut me open and left me to bleed out. I was drowning in my own

pain, sinking in my own misery. Every beat of my heart was a constant reminder that her life was stolen from her. From me and the life I wanted to give her, if only we would have come out on the other side still together. The burden was mine to bare, though. Ellie had sacrificed nothing and everything at the same time. How fucking heart breaking that she died thinking I didn’t love her? Just envisioning the moment when her eyes finally shut for the last time and the last breath passed her lips, a piece of me broke inside. Those pieces were my soul flaking away with every passing second that she was gone. I would never be whole again.

It had only been a few days, but all I had managed to do was nurse my wounds and keep myself in hiding. I unveiled myself to the brotherhood. The need for mayhem and death consumed me. I had never wanted to end a group of men so badly in my entire life than I did the moment I realized I would never see Ellie full of life again. They would be after me, if they already weren’t, though I was positive they were already searching the streets for me. Questioning those that had some kind of association with me. But I had no friends, no loved ones left, and no one to leave behind in the event that I did die. I was basically already dead. A walking, fucking talking obituary. All I

needed now was a death certificate. I grabbed the bottle of whiskey off the bar counter located in the high-end hotel I had checked-in to. It would be the last place those fuckers looked. I didn’t do high-end, nothing about me said money or success. They would look for me in the darkness. Where regular, ordinary people were scared to go, so this gave me enough time to figure out a plan and go from there. Slamming back some of the liquor, I prayed that it would numb the pain enough for me to forget her memory just like it burned my throat. When you lose someone you love and you never get the chance to tell them, to speak those

three little words to them for the very first time, it puts a burden on your very soul. I hated myself every second that I was alive and she wasn't. Especially when I promised her I would protect her. It’s your fault. Those three words echoed in my mind every single second of the day. Make them pay, Grayson. Those four words fueled me in ways no one would ever understand. My eyes narrowed as I got up and made my way to the bathroom. I stared at myself through the mirror, my reflection almost mocking me. How could I look myself in the eyes and be okay with the two lives I had lost? How

could I handle knowing that it was my fault they died? The truth was I couldn't; not now, not ever. I slammed my fist against the mirror, watching the pieces crack and break away. Dark red blotches fell against the marble counter and onto the pieces of glass that shattered moments before. Pain flowed through my ligaments and as I looked at the blood pooling, I smiled. “This is for you, Ellie. Everyday that I breathe and you don’t, I’ll bleed for you. I promise that no matter what happens, I will spend every second of my life avenging your heart.” Tears filled my eyes burning the inside of me as if they were leaving a blazing

fire down my cheeks. What a sad fucker I was. I lifted my fist again and slammed it into the remaining pieces of glass. Small pinpricks of pain could be felt against my skin as the glass shattered over and over again, just like what was left of my heart. Once every piece of glass had fell from the mirror, and I could no longer see my own reflection or feel the pain roaring through my bloodstream, I turned the water on in the shower as hot as it could go and shed my clothing. Then I stepped into the steam, into the flesh-burning water and waited for the pain to consume my body; for the heat to melt away the pain. I was slowly dying. I might be breathing, and I might have blood pumping through my veins,

but I was dying so slowly that even time was of no essence. Blackness was taking over, and as I teetered right on the edge of life and death I saw her. It was in her smooth skin, sweet smile, and soft eyes that I slipped even deeper into the darkness. “Ellie…” My voice was hoarse and full of unsaid emotions as I looked at her. She smiled, her body a silhouette in the light. I shook my head, trying to shake the fantasy of her away. It’s a lie. She’s not here. She’s dead. But she wouldn't disappear, she kept invading my thoughts. “Grayson,” she spoke gently, my body sinking further into the

darkness as the softness of her voice blanketed me. Her dark blue eyes seemed to grow darker as she stared up at me. “You’re killing yourself… aren’t you?” Anger radiated from her. I could feel a coldness descending upon me. “Death is such an easy thing to deal with when you have lost all those worth living for…” My own words echoed back in my mind. Ellie’s reflection fizzled out and came back into view right before my eyes. I watched as she lifted her hands to my face, her fingers skimming across my forehead and down my cheeks, stopping at the top of my beard. She smiled, and warmth filled me once again. “We die only once,

Grayson... but we live…” she paused, and her voice was so much like Heaven I almost wanted to beg her to continue to speak, “…we live for the moments when the pain is the hardest. When the raindrops fall coldly against our skin and the sun dries them away. You live for the good days and the bad, not just the days you choose to.” I clenched my fists together. Her words held so much meaning. She made me want to be a better man, a better person, all for her. But she's not here. She's dead. I reminded myself. I had to. “You made a promise to me, Grayson. To your sister…” I narrowed my eyes, the anger I

had felt moments ago returning with each passing second. I was trapped in my subconscious because I knew when I came out of it fully she wouldn't be here, and it would be like losing her all over again. “I can’t do it, Ellie. I couldn’t save either one of you. What makes you think I could ever avenge your deaths? I couldn’t even keep you the fuck alive!!!” I bellowed out, swinging my fists at her memory. That’s all it was, a memory inside of my head. Her lips turned up in a smile as her form reappeared in front of me. I needed her to leave me alone, to let me wallow in my own fears and pain. I needed to mourn her death and

move on with my life even if it killed me. “Leave, Ellie. Go away and take your memories with you!” I screamed, tears forming in my eyes once again, but this time they trailed down my cheeks. I wiped them away hastily with the back of my hand. I hadn’t cried since my sister died, hadn't shown any vulnerability since I lost her. But now I couldn't control the emotion being ripped out of me. I couldn't stop it. “I know you love me. I can feel it right now, deep inside my heart.” She took a step back, her lips still turned up as if she felt she had truly won this battle. What she didn’t understand was the battle was between

me, myself, and I. “Remember that, because when you need me most that is where you will find me.” I roared, anger flaring from every piece of my flesh as I jumped out of the shower and towards where her figure was previously standing. Beating my fists against the wooden door, I refused to stop until blood dripped from my skin. Each hit of my skin and splintering sound of wood pushed me that much closer to satisfaction. I wanted to kill, to remove the anguish deep inside my body. “You killed her!!!” The words fell from my lips repeatedly as tears continued to roll down my face. My heart was aching, my hands were

numb, and the liquor I previously consumed was now wearing off. I looked up at the door before me and then down at my bloodied fists. The whole bathroom was destroyed, yet her memory still remained in my mind. It was all for nothing. Plain and simple. Grabbing the bottle of whiskey from the counter, I slid down onto the floor bringing it to my lips. “I just want her to leave…” I whispered to myself as I sat naked, the coldness of the floor cooling my heated flesh. Loving her wasn’t nearly as hard as losing her was. That was the last thought to enter my mind as my body

finally gave into the blackness eating away at my soul.

Five days had passed since my so called death, and I was itching to get more information out of Tuck. All he had told me about our location was that we were at a safe house, and by safe house he meant his house. Just outside the city, deep in the countryside. I hadn’t left the room he had put me in since getting here,

not that I really wanted or needed to leave. This room had everything I needed— bathroom included— and Tuck even brought me three meals a day straight to my room door. If I looked out my bedroom window I could see the fields of green grass and woodlands surrounding me. Other than that I had no idea where we were exactly, location wise anyways. “If you keep pacing, you’re going to wear a path through my brand new hardwood floors.” Tuck laughed, causing me to jump out of my own skin. Shit, he could be sneaky when he wanted to be. I hadn't even heard the door creak open. “Jesus, Tuck!” I clenched

my chest, turning around to face him. He watched me closely, before giving me a half smile. “I need you to come out of this room and actually do something…” Tuck trailed off. I stared blankly. “I’m dead, Tuck. Dead. Not literally, but still I’m considered dead. Grayson thinks I’m dead. My father thinks I’m dead. Drake even thinks I’m dead.” I stepped into his space. “All I want is to be undead and for my father and Drake to be dead. I want to hug Grayson and tell him it wasn’t his fault, not come out of this room and actually do something!” Tears were forming. I was an emotional wreck because of all of this.

“Shhh…” Tuck soothed me, taking his thumb and wiping away a stray tear. “Grayson will understand once he finds out. Word on the street is he went into hiding anyway. He lost his shit on your father and Drake, telling them and everyone else that he would avenge your death.” My heart ached at the very sound of Grayson’s name being spoken out into the open. No amount of time that we had spent together could ever be considered enough to me. He changed me and gave me something to believe in, even when I couldn’t believe in myself. He saved me, even if he felt this very moment that he failed me, and when I saw him again I would remind him of just that.

“He won’t understand, Tuck. He’s going to be beyond fucking pissed that you lied to him, and he’s going to be upset with me that I just went along with it,” I growled as my inner thoughts finally surfaced. I had thought the whole thing through just as if I was in Grayson’s shoes. Gone over scenario after scenario and it all came back to the same thing. Tuck pulled away, cracking his knuckles before shrugging quickly. “Leave that to me. Gray and I go way back, and if anyone can kick his ass back into reality it would be me.” I could feel my lips pulling as if they involuntarily wanted to smile. Being around Tuck now was different than being around him the

first time we met. He did a good job of hiding this carefree man underneath the raging bull I met that night in the alley. “Either way, we can’t just sit here and pretend like people aren’t trying to kill him or you. They’re looking for you too, I’m sure.” I shoved a lock of my hair behind my ear and waited for his response. Tuck’s face was void of any emotion, which kind of scared me. I had been a runner and hider all my life. Knowing that someone was after me, hunting me, thirsty for my blood made me want to run away in terror. But Tuck seemed almost uncaring, as if it didn't bother him one bit. “Come with me.” The words left him in a hurry as he grabbed

me by the arm pulling me towards the bedroom door. I didn’t want to leave the confines of this room, not yet at least. “Where are we going?” I clenched my teeth together, dragging my feet the whole way out of the room. My stomach shot up into my chest as one of my feet scraped over the bedroom threshold. “Where I should’ve taken you to begin with.” Tuck’s voice caused a shiver to run down my spine. Fear had long been rooted deep in my veins. What if all of this was yet another trap? “And where is that?” I sank my heels further into the floor, a throbbing sensation forming in my foot. Tuck laughed, stopping dead in his

tracks causing me to run straight into his back. I pulled away, but his hand still remained attached. I gazed down at it and then back up at him. “You don’t have to act like a fucking cat that’s on its way to be drowned.” He chuckled, and a blush rose on my cheeks. “I…” I stuttered over my words. “I don’t want to go. I told you that already,” I added. Tuck blinked and then his smile grew wider. “I’m not stupid. I know you think that all of this could be a set up.” He waved his hand in reference to everything around us and then leaned into me causing my eyes to grow wide with uncertainty.

“Like I said not stupid, buttercup. Now, come on. I want you to meet someone.” His voice came out much softer, and his green eyes lit up brightly as he spoke, which told me whomever it was that he wanted me to meet was someone he was quite fond of and it left me completely caught off guard when he continued to pull me down the hall a moment later. “I don’t care who it is that you want me to meet. I don’t want to socialize! I want to find Grayson, and I want to end this all before anyone else dies or has to fake their death,” I huffed out, not realizing that we had descended a set of stairs and was now standing in a living room attached to an open kitchen.

My mouth stopped moving, the words I had planned to say caught in my throat. What were we talking about again? I couldn’t remember, my eyes were too trained on the things around me. I was taking in a whole new environment for the very first time. Tuck had exquisite taste, and by exquisite I should say manly. The living room had floor to ceiling car siding. A huge screen TV was hanging above the fireplace on the far right side of the room, and the furniture was all leather. The smell of freshly cut wood and smoke filled the air. It was calming and somehow inviting at the same time. As my eyes swung around the room and over each item, I failed to take

notice of the woman in the kitchen. She was standing there nonchalantly, uncaring that she was helping Tuck hide a supposedly dead person. Instead she adjusted the straps on her white sundress like she hadn’t a care in the damn world. I took all of her in at once: her shoulder length hair that was the color of coffee. Her eyes green. Her small bellowing figure. She couldn’t be much taller than me. Taking a deep breath I stopped for a moment, just long enough to notice that she was now staring at me, a soft smile lingering on her lips. It was in that smile, the way her lips pulled at the top, and the way her bottom lip plumped out a bit that I felt like I had seen her before.

I tilted my head sideways, trying to pinpoint exactly where it was that I had noticed her before. “Don’t look at her like she’s going to bite you.” Tuck chuckled before adding, “I mean after all, you will have to get used to having her around for awhile.” “Why is that?” I asked, narrowing my eyes at him. He smiled at me with his eyes and then looked up at the woman across the room. Then he leaned into my ear and whispered, “That’s Stephanie and she’s Grayson’s sister.” My eyes almost jumped out of my head as the ground beneath me began to shake. “Get me some water, Steph.

She’s going down,” Tuck yelled next to my ear, but his voice seemed so far away. Even as I fell against the leather couch I couldn’t think of anything else but the fact that Grayson’s sister was alive and that she was standing here in Tuck’s house. “We’re losing her!” Tuck exclaimed. “What the hell did you do?” Stephanie asked, her voice full of panic. “Nothing. I just told her the truth,” Tuck spoke, but it was faint. Everything happening around me was in slow motion as the sounds in the background became white noise. My eyes rolled back as the blood rushed to my head.

I needed time alone. Time to comprehend what I had just been told. Stephanie was Grayson’s sister, and more importantly than that—she was alive.

“Grayson…” Her singsong voice met my ears and caused a tingling sensation all over my body. Her giggles seemed to echo down the hall, and the fast pitter-patter of her feet across the floor told me she wanted to play hide and seek. She only ever spoke like this when she wanted to do

something and she knew her older brother didn’t want too. It made it easier for me to give in to her. “Stephanie,” I said her name back with the same tone. As much as I disliked having to play with Stephanie all the time, she was my sister and when it came down to it I didn’t have anyone else to play with. It was always just Stephanie and I. Always had been, always would be. I followed her small noises down the hall and into her bedroom where I knew surely she would be hiding. The smile I wore on my face wasn’t one for just show when I was with my sister. I genuinely was happy, my heart filled to the brim with joy.

“Where oh where could she be?” I questioned loudly, my voice booming throughout the room. I fixed my gaze on her bed and from there I eyed her dresser, looking around her room as if I hadn’t the first clue as to where it was that she was hiding. Giggles filled the air a second time, and then a gasp as I lunged towards the closet doors and flung them open with a grin plastered on my face. There she stood, her hair in a dark brown braid, her eyes a soft green looking up at me with amusement. She had one hand on her hip, and the other hand was in a tight little fist with one finger jutting out. That one finger was pointed directly at

me. “Grayson! You’re not to cheat.” She laughed, trying to make her voice sound serious. I rolled my eyes and stuck my tongue out. This kid was always trying to accuse me of something, so long as she could be seen as the winner. “It’s not cheating when you practically beg me to come and play with you,” I corrected her. I watched as her cheeks grew red and her green eyes darkened with anger. She didn’t like it when I proved her wrong. Like I said, she always had to be the winner. “Liar.” She pouted as she pushed past me.

“Meanie,” I countered back, wrapping both arms around her back. “Jerk.” She tried to wiggle away. “Brat.” I raised an eyebrow. She turned her attention to me before finally giving in and leaning into me. “You’re lucky you’re my brother, otherwise I would kick your ass,” she whispered, and I could see a smile pulling at her lips, a loud laugh breaking away as she ran free from me. “Stephanie Rose!” I bellowed. She knew better than to swear, even more so at her brother. “Eat my shorts, Grayson.”

Of course, I shook my head and headed towards my bedroom. There was no point in trying to stop a bullet. The moment it was released from the chamber, it was already on its own track and in this case, Steph was that bullet. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. My phone started going off somewhere in the distance. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. I groaned into the air, hoping the memory of Stephanie would disappear. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. “What the fuck!” I snarled, leaning over the bed to grab my phone from off the nightstand. My ears

followed the loud beeping, until it stopped. Ahhh. Silence. Just as I was about to nod back off to sleep it started again, telling me it wasn’t just an alarm but someone calling. Fuck, just what I needed. People trying to get a hold of me, especially at this point in time. People would be calling for one thing only. To get me on the phone long enough for me to be tracked. With a stretch of my arms, I shoved from the bed and went over to the corner of the room where I last heard the beeping. My heart beat in my ears, the blood rushing to my head causing my ears to ring as I snagged the black

iPhone from a pile of clothes thrown on the floor. Did I even want to see who had called? One way or another I would have to face all of them again. I wasn’t scared. I just didn’t have a plan yet, and even I knew that walking into something blindly wasn’t a good idea. Flipping my phone over in my hand, my eyes scanned the brightly lit screen before landing on Tuck’s name flickering in the missed call section. Of course, it was then that my stomach jumped into my throat and the contents of last night’s drowning threatened to come up. Tuck had and still was, as far as I knew, my closest friend. He knew everything about Stephanie and I. Now,

he knew about Ellie too and would be the first to tell me it wasn’t my fault. We had been through this routine more than once, how cliché was that. Anger rattled deep inside my chest as the memory of Ellie and what had happened came surging back to life. Of all the people to talk to, Tuck should be the last person I actually talked to. He wasn’t even there when Ellie died, because if he had been he could've saved her just like I could have had I been there. Shaking my head, I shake those thoughts away. I can't blame Tuck. I can't put anything on him. He warned me of the repercussions I would have and though I acknowledged them, I still ignored them. No one was to blame

but me. I clenched my phone firmly in my sweaty palm, my mind shifting from Tuck and back to Ellie. “Why can’t I get her out of my head?” I spoke out loud, refusing to say her name. My chest heaved as I looked around the room for something to drown myself in. Being awake was like a never-ending hurricane. The days were filled with torrential down pours, and the nights were filled with thunder and lightning that seemed to never end. I was drowning in my own misery. Beep. Beep. Beep. The beeping started again, pulling me from my mind and reminding me that I couldn’t ignore this forever. I inhaled

oxygen and held it in not releasing it till I slid my finger across the screen and brought the phone up to my ear. “About fucking time you answer the phone. I thought you were dead, dude.” Tuck’s voice was filled with excitement. Excitement that I just didn’t understand. He had to be aware of all that went down. If he wasn’t then he had to be hiding under a rock somewhere for the last couple of days. “Might as well be.” My voice was gruff. I sounded like a broken hearted fool, but wasn’t that the truth. I had lost two people that I loved, even after telling myself I would never love another after Stephanie’s death. He laughed loudly into the

phone, “I know losing her was hard man…” There was a pause and then all I could hear was his breathing on the other end. “You don’t know…” I started. “I do know, and I don’t want to do this shit over the phone. Let’s meet somewhere?” he asked eagerly. I took a deep breath letting oxygen filter through my lungs. It had been days since I last stepped outside. I wasn’t ready for a fight with my ex-boss, even if I wanted to seek revenge as badly as I did. Ellie was gone and I needed to mourn her death. I needed to put her behind me until I was successful in my revenge, because if I didn’t I

wouldn’t be able to keep my promise to her. “Yeah, that’s not really a good idea. I’m sure you know by now, but I…” I stumbled over my choice of words. “I basically told bossman he could rot in his fucking grave and that Drake would be the first fucker that’s going to die once I get my shit together.” My fist clenched so hard I could feel the bones in my knuckles cracking. I had never wanted to spill someone’s blood as much as I did Drake’s. The things he had done to my Ellie… I would make him pay a million times over. Death would be his only way out of my clutches. “Gray, I heard what went

down. I was there, don’t you remember?” he questioned. My eyes narrowed as I worked through my memories. Right after they took Ellie away, my world shifted. Tuck had said he would help me get her back, but after that I hadn’t heard from him. He was lying to me, playing with my mind for his own benefit. “I may be a lot of things, but I'm not fucking stupid. You're lyin-” He interrupted me before I could finish my sentence. “Look. I got shit I need to explain, shit that I can’t do over the fucking phone. Therefore, I need you to meet somewhere. Somewhere discreet, and if you think I’m going to set you up

or some stupid shit then you’re wrong. You’re my best friend, dude, and I have bigger fish to fry.” As much as I didn’t want to say it out loud, that had been my biggest fear since is answered the phone. I was worried that Tuck calling and wanting to meet up would end with him turning me over to Ellie’s father. Without a plan it would end in my own demise. “Are you still there, Gray? I need an answer now; will you meet me? Because otherwise, I’m coming wherever the hell it is that you’re holding yourself up at.” Fuck! There was no way he was coming here. Then I would have to explain what happened to the bathroom, and I wasn’t going there

with him. “Meet me at the coffee shop down on third,” I hissed out between my teeth, pulling the phone away from my ear, and ending the call before I could even change my mind about going. I didn’t give Tuck a chance to change the place of meeting or give him a time. I knew he would know to get there as fast as he could. Walking over to the bathroom, my eyes flickered over the mess that I had made days ago. I had yet to clean it up and every time housekeeping came I turned them away. I was a walking, talking disaster. An evil man on a warpath with my own emotions. I had the potential to

kill everything in my path, and I would in due time. There was no other options for me. I had to let the anger fuel my rage, to fester the fire, because if it didn’t I would become a cold shell of who I was. I would sit in this hotel room, destroying shit— destroying myself—slowly but surely, because I couldn’t handle the loss of those that mattered most to me. The loss of love. Looking down at my phone I realized I had been muttering and thinking to myself for over five minutes. If Tuck was as fast as he usually was, I would be fucking late. I hadn’t prepared

to leave this hotel room, so I needed to find something to wear quickly. Walking over to my suitcase, I unzipped it and pulled out the first thing I saw-a pair of clean blue jeans and a gray sweater. After slipping into my clothes, I slid my feet into my black boots. I wasn’t much to look at, in fact I looked like a fucking mess right this second, but no one in that café had to know I spent the last few days drowning my sorrows at the bottom of countless bottles. My gaze flickered down to the homemade bandage that covered my hand. I was completely fucked up, but that didn’t mean I was ready to die yet. There was no way Tuck wouldn’t notice

it and that meant that I would have to explain how the fuck it had happened. I didn’t want to explain anything to anyone. I wanted to talk without words. My fists would do more justice. Grabbing my wallet off the nightstand my eyes landed on the one thing of value I had left. It was a picture of Stephanie and I. I must have grabbed it out of my room before fleeing. Without hesitation I reached out, my fingers sliding across the fragile glass. It was taken over fifteen years ago. The smile she adorned was one that I would never get to see again. Tears filled my eyes, one trickling down my face and onto the picture frame. It made a large splotch of wetness against the

glass. Breath filtered into my lungs as I wiped the trail the lone tear left behind. Placing the picture down on the nightstand, I walked away. Out of the hotel and out into the streets, leaving the memories of the women I loved there. The streets didn't have any room for vulnerabilities. I needed to end this madness. For myself. For Stephanie. For Ellie.

Blinking my eyes open, a throbbing in my head beat in sync with my heart. Trying to swallow, I realized I couldn’t. My throat felt raw, as if it had been scrapped with old rusty nails and the night before came back slowly. Tequila. A whole bottle. What started out as one drink

soon turned into more until I had downed the entire bottle in hopes of forgetting the problems I couldn't escape. My skin begun to crawl, forcing me to shoot up. My body ached with the sudden movement, and I winced in pain. I was still recovering from the damage Drake had caused. I sighed, knowing none of what had happened the day prior was a dream but a horrible nightmare. Even worse was when my eyes roamed the room and I realized that I wasn't in the bed in Tuck’s house, but in the living room on his leather couch. Was I that far gone that I fell asleep on the sofa? Someone cleared their throat loudly, drawing my attention, and when I looked in the

direction I found Grayson’s sister staring at me from a chair across the room. She was supposed to be dead. Buried deep in the ground. Yet she was here. Very much alive and in my presence. “Tucker had to leave for a little while and wanted me to look after you.” Her voice was soft, her eyes dark. One look told me she had her own secrets, which I already knew. I didn’t need to know a single thing about her. We all harbored our own secrets. The only issue being if mine were worse than hers, or if we both were fighting the same battle? “Ummm…” I wasn’t sure what to say, that and my tongue had yet

to catch up with my brain and what was going on. All I could I focus on was how endearing she sounded when she called him Tucker instead of Tuck. “You seem slightly shocked, and a bit… I don’t know… flabbergasted, but mainly shocked.” She pursed her lips and tilted her head to the side as if she was reading me, trying to figure out what my next move would be. “I…” My head felt heavy as I shifted into an upright position, my back settling onto the leather cushion behind me. I blinked once, hoping I could undo what I had seen. Stephanie was alive, and worst of all she seemed a bit–off. “You don’t have to answer

that, I mean I’m supposed to be dead.” She smiled, and it met her eyes causing them to twinkle in the dim lighting. My hands flew to my mouth in shock. Not once had I ever been shocked into silence, and I had a lot of bad shit happen to me in my life. “How…?” The words left me without thought. I could’ve asked a million and one other questions. If Grayson were here now he would be kicking me for not touching her, hugging her to make sure she was at the very least real. She shrugged, getting up from the chair, and heading towards the kitchen. I watched quietly and curiously, wondering when she would disappear.

“Water?” She returned a moment later. I nodded my head yes, grabbing the bottle that she offered me from her hand. “Your brother. He, he doesn’t know,” I stated, even though it seemed to come out more like a question. “Grayson.” I watched the way her body lit up when she said her brother’s name. A mist formed over her eyes, and I could see the memories of her past catching up with her. “He was not just my brother but my best friend too. I mean, I only had him. We only had each other growing up, so I had no one else to compare him to, but still.” “He will want to know

you’re alive,” I said in between gulps of water, praying the cotton ball effect would go away. Yes, Grayson had broken my heart. All but ripped it from my chest and fed it to a bunch of sharks, but he did it to protect me. He deserved to know that Stephanie was alive, and even more so that I was alive too. “Time. Time will tell if he can handle that or not.” The queasiness was starting to wear off and in its place anger was building. “Time?” I raised my voice. “Grayson thinks your death is his fault. He thinks that all of this is his fault. The person he is now has everything to do with your death,” I declared.

“Don’t try and make me feel one more ounce of guilt than I already do!” she growled, turning on her heels and walking over to the window that overlooked the countryside. I wanted to slap the shit out of her. She made it seem like everything her brother had been through was not a big deal, that the guilt that ran through his veins wasn’t her fault. “Blood coats his hands. The blood of his enemies. The blood of victims from his rage. It coats his hands, and it’s all because of you,” I confessed. My chest heaved every word. I hated how nonchalant she was acting. How could she not want her brother to know she was alive and walking around? He

deserved to know far more than anyone else did. I was mid-thought and a moment away from telling her to fuck off when she turned back around to face me. I could see the mistiness in her eyes as unshed tears hung in the balance. It was then that I knew she understood what I was saying, but still that wasn’t enough for me. She didn’t truly understand how much Grayson changed, that much I knew. “I’m aware of the pain that all of this has caused him, but just like you I never asked for any of this to happen.” She bit her bottom lip trying to stop the tears from coming. I knew what that felt like. Like I said before

—secrets. “You knew he would want to know. You knew he would feel horrible about your death, and you did nothing to let him know or even give him hope that you survived.” I felt defeated. All the meds that had been running through my veins in the last week were finally starting to wear off and in its place, I was starting to feel the cuts and bruises from what had happened with Drake. That, and I was emotionally and mentally exhausted. “I know!” she yelled, throwing her hands in the air. “But I don’t have to explain to you what happened, just like you don’t have to explain to me how you came into contact

with my brother or Tucker.” She took a step forward, and then another until she was directly in front of me. “We both have a past checkered in darkness. We both have made bad choices, choices that shouldn’t be thrown in one another’s faces. I did what I had to do to make things right. You’re doing what you have to do right now. Not because you want to, but because you know that if you turn around and run from Tucker then what he saved you from won’t even matter because you’d just be putting Grayson in more danger.” I clenched my teeth together at her words. Truth was a real bitch, and it was even fucking worse when it was

coming from the mouth of his sister. “I’m not throwing it in your face, and I’m well aware that there are other fucking things that could be said right now… But…” I paused for a moment trying to get my emotions under control. I had never been the type to tell someone how I truly felt, but Grayson changed that about me. He gave me the strength to stand my ground after years of running, and, therefore, I was going to make sure Stephanie knew where I stood with all of this. “But you don’t deserve your brother’s love. You don’t understand how your death changed him, and if you don’t understand it now then you never will. You’re better off dead in

his eyes.” I couldn’t stop the word vomit from coming, nor could I stop myself from leaving the room the second I said them. No, not everyone wanted to hear the truth and she probably didn’t, but that was the thing about it. Sometimes it hurt more than the actual lie. I wasn’t about lying to Stephanie. My whole life was a lie. My father. Drake. And now Grayson. My heart thumped loudly in my chest as I closed the door to the bedroom Tuck had given me. Stephanie and I were both right. What had happened to her was the past, but now it was colliding with the future. What was happening now, was my future colliding with the past. Running from my father was a mistake.

Tuck faking my death was even worse because the second my father or Drake found out that I was alive it wouldn’t be me that they came for–it would be Grayson. Actual death was starting to look like it would be an easier life.

“A large black coffee. Two creams. Three sugars,” Tuck stated to the waitress as I took a seat in front of him, the waitress walking away before my ass could even hit the seat. We had been friends so long the fucker had memorized how I took my coffee. I smirked, unable to stop myself from

doing so. Today, at this very moment was the first time I had genuinely smiled in days. The thought of what I had just done made my stomach churn simply because I had no reason for happiness in my life, yet here I was blessed with this fucker for a best friend. “It’s really fucking creepy that you know exactly how I order my coffee. Even worse that you just said it out loud.” I rubbed a hand down my face, trying to hide the tiredness in my eyes. Sleep wasn’t something I got around to nowadays. I couldn’t sleep when every time I closed my eyes the nightmare called my life played behind my eyelids. It was like my own personal hell; one I

couldn’t even escape while sleeping. “What’s creepy is the fact that you wanted to meet at a café amongst all the other places in this neighborhood. And that you look as if you haven’t slept in days, and you smell like sweat and whiskey. What have you been doing other than drowning yourself at the bottom of a bottle?” Tuck’s tone was serious as he questioned me. He was eyeing me with more concern than needed. “I don’t need you to be worried about me. I’m working everything out now. In fact, I’m only meeting with you because you made it seem like this was something we needed to do right this fucking second,” I hissed out. My

irritability was astounding, like a giant fucking elephant in the room. Plus, I really wanted to know why he had lied to me over the phone. After all I had been through, here I was sitting nicely, ordering a coffee, and waiting for Tuck to tell me whatever seemed so fucking important to drag me out into the city. Tuck’s nose wrinkled and then he shot a look over both shoulders as if he was looking to see if someone had followed him. I knew it because it was the same damn thing I did on the walk down here. I knew Ellie’s father had been watching my every movement, and if not him then Drake was at the very least tailing me or trying to. They both had to have some idea as to where I

was. In a city like this, being the people they were. There was no way they couldn’t. “First, I know you aren’t holding it together that well.” Tuck took this second to look me over completely, assessing me from head to toe before he continued, “I’m not dumb. Ellie died, and you pretend like you have your shit together when really we both know you don’t. Second, I need your help devising a plan to take down the brotherhood.” Color me fucking shocked. “You mean, you aren’t working for with them anymore?” My hands shifted to the back of my head. There were parts of that night that I either couldn’t remember or that I had forced myself to forget. Black

spots in your memory were never a good thing when you were trying to figure out how to take people out. If you couldn’t remember what happened, you couldn’t tell who you still had as a friend or who had become a foe. “Do you have short term memory loss? I already told you that.” Tuck looked at me sideways, his voice hushed as he shot yet another look around the room to make sure no one was watching us. Exhaling a breath, I inhaled one right after taking in the oxygen slowly to calm my nerves. Everything that took place and that was still happening was taking a toll on me. My nerves were fucking shot. I was jittery, like a crack

addict waiting for their next fix and I didn’t even do drugs. I couldn’t even remember the last time I ate a full meal. I couldn’t stomach it. I couldn’t stomach a fucking thing. “Alright.” I sighed, swallowing past the sadness in my throat. “I’m not okay. I’m drowning. Fucking suffocating. I can breathe, but it’s not ever a full breath. Every time I close my eyes I see her. Her body face down on the cold concrete. Everyone staring at her lifeless body, her father and Luke, I mean Drake. Fuck, how could I have been so blind? Why didn’t I see that he was far worse than the man we thought he was? All this time and I never suspected a damn thing. We’ve heard stories about Drake, man.

We know how ruthless he is, and to know that he was the man that Ellie was promised to; I can’t wrap my head around that or what she must have endured all those years with those two fucks.” My voice changed with my thoughts. A growl rumbled from deep within my chest, causing wandering eyes to look over at us. “It broke what was left of my beating heart, Tuck. I loved her, for the first time in years I opened myself up to someone again only to lose them. It’s like I’m reliving a constant nightmare. A clear reminder that I can’t have good things in my life.” The pain and truthfulness in those very words evoked enough emotion out of me to cause my

fist to come flying down on the table we were sitting at and the coffee to slush out of our cups. “Calm the fuck down,” Tuck hushed me, placing his hand upon my shoulder. His fingers squeezed the skin as if he knew I needed some type of connection to the present. “I’m reliving the pain all over again. Losing my sister was hard. It was the hardest thing in the world. There isn’t a moment that goes by where I’m not thinking about her. Her death pushed me into this life, and when I met Ellie, I felt something I hadn’t in years. Life. Love. A rush of blood to a part of my body that I thought was nothing but a cold block of ice.” My feelings were

bursting from deep inside of me. A river that had been damned for years was close to breaking. “That’s why we have to focus on taking out Drake and her father. We have to put an end to all the chaos they caused. It’s our jobs to make them pay for the death of those we love,” Tuck exclaimed. “We?” I asked as I shrugged his hand off my shoulder no longer wanting to be touched. “Yes, we. We're in this together, man.” “No. You said those we love? Who is we? What aren't you telling me?” I questioned him. My blood was boiling. I knew we all had secrets. Secrets we

wished to keep hidden, but this was my best friend. Hell, my only friend. I've told him things that haunted me while he’d kept his secret. Secrets. They make or break you. “I was speaking in general, but mostly because you're like my brother. When you lose something, so do I.” The look in his eyes, even the slight, almost unnoticeable tremble in his voice sounded sincere, but I can't stop myself from questioning him further. “Tell me one thing. Why did you lie on the phone? Why did you tell me you were there that night when you weren’t? When you had been missing in

fucking action for hours on end? Why?!” I ask, my voice rising with each word causing more and more people to start to stare, their eyes seeking us out, their mouths moving, making their own assumptions. “Can I help you?” I barked at the table next to us, the women's eyes growing wide with fear as they scurried away. “Enough, Grayson. You’re going to draw too much attention to us,” Tuck intersected before I could take my anger out on the bystanders. Gripping the back of my jacket, he yanked me up from the table and dragged me right outside into the busy street. “Get the fuck off of me before I

do something stupid like break your fucking face,” I seethed, pulling from his grip and taking a step back. My chest burned and my eyes glazed over as I pushed the tears that desperately wanted to fall from my eyes away. I was a grown ass man, on the verge of a mental breakdown. “Take your fucking shot, brother,” Tuck joked, his laughter filtering down the alleyway I had stepped into. I didn’t need to be seen gallivanting the city streets. “That’s just what he wants, Tuck. He wants us to be exactly as he created us to be. Of course, he wants me to act out in rage and violence. That’s why I’m still here, that's why I'm still breathing,”

I bellowed, taking another step away from him. Yes, I wanted to avenge Ellie’s death and make her father pay, but a part of me knew that’s what he expected of me. “They take away the things we love most because it’s easier to keep us confined that way. You can’t leave if you don’t have an exit.” Ellie’s father wanted a killer loose on the streets doing his dirty work. He wanted me as broken as I was when I lost my sister. “I have something to tell you.” Tuck’s words snapped me back to the present and immediately I was in his face, waiting for him to finish his sentence. His eyes diverted away from mine as if he was trying to keep his

secrets hidden a little while longer. “What I’m going to tell you changes nothing. The focus still needs to be on removing these fuckers from this city because if we don’t Ellie’s father and Drake—fuck even the brotherhood— will never stop.” I bit my tongue not wanting to interrupt him but wanting to know what the fuck was going on. “Nothing you say can change their fate. It's still going to happen. I don’t care how heartbroken I am over. It doesn’t change anything.” I stared at him straight on, my eyes frantic. “It changes nothing.” Tuck slowly slid his hands into his front pockets and then tipped his head back groaning loudly as if he was

contemplating telling me. Pushing my chest into his, I narrowed my eyes at him. He was a breath away from being slammed onto the concrete. “What are you waiting for? Tell me the truth now. Tell me where you really were and what you were really doing that night.” Air filtered in through my nose as my nostrils flared, anger raging just below the surface. That adrenaline rush that always seemed to hit me right before I made a kill was entering my bloodstream. Tuck had all of five seconds to start speaking before I did something I was sure I would regret later. I was a bull in a china shop. A bullet exiting a chamber. In plain terms, I

was ready to kill. “Ellie is alive.” The words rushed out of him, and every single fiber in my body seemed to freeze. Air no longer existed. My heartbeat thrummed in my ears, and sweat covered my body as if it was raining from the sky. “Love isn’t real, Grayson.” I couldn’t see the face of the man speaking to me, but his words hit me directly in the chest. “I know what is real,” I whispered softly. “You know nothing but what I want you to know,” the man screamed, a slap landing against my face right after. “What I feel deep inside…” I

growled, taking a step closer instead of retreating. Images of Stephanie entered my mind. “Is real. Love is real. What happened to her is real!” I screamed, making each one of my words bigger than his. “It can’t be real,” I sneered, challenging him to prove me wrong. He had to prove me wrong. Otherwise, he would forever be a liar in my eyes. “It’s real, Grayson. That's where I was that night. That's what I was doing. I made sure she stayed alive. I made sure she made it out of that place in one piece. It was the least I could do,” Tuck confessed, his eyes begging me to believe him. It wasn’t real. It couldn’t be real.

I continued to repeat the thought in my mind. I knew when something sounded too good to be true and that was what this was. A too good to be true moment. A trap. “Stop! Stop fucking with me. Stop trying to make me go back. It’s not happening.” “It’s real. It’s not a lie or a ploy. It was a plan I somewhat devised as I searched for her. I didn’t expect to take her, but at the same time if it happened I was going to be prepared. I knew I made a commitment to you, so I went digging in hopes of finding out where she could be hidden. When I stumbled upon her and Luke— I mean Drake— and saw how beaten she was, there was nothing

that could stop me from taking her. Fuck, you weren’t the only one blown away by his true identity, man. I question myself daily on how I never suspected a thing. How I missed it,” he paused and ran his hand through his hair before continuing on, “Anyways, I did a little flirting and haggling at the hospital with a nurse that I showed a good time a couple of months ago. I’m glad I kept her around because with her help I was able to get a drug that they use to place patients into a coma called Midazolam. It forces your brain to slow your heart rate and breathing down.” He paused once again, getting his bearings together. “I was originally going to see if I could find some info about where she

was being held. My intention was never to go in alone or to keep anything a secret from you when it concerned her. But when I saw what he was about to do to her, everything changed and I was forced to act on my own. I couldn’t control the anger I was feeling, and I went for him. If I had left Ellie there to be discovered, they would’ve killed her thinking she attacked Drake, and I'm sure he would have the others think she did as well. I had the medication needed with me to pull it all off, so I dosed her up and passed her off as dead.” I gripped at my hair in frustration. How had he been able to do this and to keep it a secret for days? He lied to me and it wasn’t a white lie. It was a lie

between life and death. He kept it from me for days while I wallowed in pity, grief, and remorse. Did he think he was protecting me from the inevitable? “Why should I believe everything you're telling me? Why should I trust you after all the lies? Why would the brotherhood still trust you after you attacked Drake? “I already told you I'm not working for him anymore. I'm no longer a part of the brotherhood. They just don't know that. They think I'm out on the streets searching for you. I call them every day and tell them I have yet to track you anywhere in the city and they tell me to keep looking. That you'll show your face soon enough. That's why they

trust me. You should trust me because after I attacked Drake—as you put it—I wrapped my hands around Ellie’s throat with no pressure at all while I slipped the syringe from my sleeve and inserted it into her neck. From the camera view, it looked as if I were choking her, but that wasn’t the case at all. After the medicine took effect in her body, I knew my plan could work, so I got a safe place to take Ellie ready when it came time to dispose of her body. When I returned, they wanted me to do the dirty work. After I had her hidden away safely instead of sinking to the bottom of the ocean, I went back to the brotherhood. Boss questioned me. Wanted to know why I attacked another brother. I told

him because she had been beaten within an inch of her life, she was barely holding on, and my so called brother was about to rape her. I told him I attacked Drake because I wanted to be the person to take her last breath away from her, that I wanted a taste of what she had given you so I could understand why you’d all but went against us and everything we stood for. I told them what I thought and knew they wanted to hear. I went on and on until the interrogation stopped. Until there was not one ounce of doubt left in their eyes.” As I let what he said sink in, I knew I owed him a piece of my life. I also knew he needed to understand that Ellie was mine and that lying to me wasn’t okay.

Lifting my fist, I reached out and punched him. There was no hesitation in my movements. My knuckles scraped across his cheek as bone collided with bone. His head snapped back with the force of my fist. Anger swirled deep inside me covering my entire body with a coat of rage. He might have saved Ellie’s life, but he lied to me. In fact, that's where all his recent secrets and small lies had started. He could’ve told me what he was doing. He could’ve asked for help. “It wasn’t your job to save her. It wasn’t your job to do anything. You should’ve come to me first,” I barked, and his head lifted as he wiped at his nose to see if there was any blood. My

mind was everywhere, taking in everything he had told me but still questioning him the same. Why shouldn't I believe that the same way he went to them and told them what they needed to hear that he wasn't doing the same thing to me right now? I gave no shits as I pulled back my fist and landed another blow under his chin. He did nothing but stand there, taking my hits because he knew that he fucking deserved it. Don't get me wrong, I was a thankful man that he had saved Ellie, but it should’ve been me who saved her. Not my best friend, not a man that was nothing more than a friend to her if that. I didn’t like having to pay people back for the things they did. It

was best to do shit yourself so they couldn’t hang it over your head later. The very thought only added fuel to the fire. I was on the verge of burning this entire fucking city down. “It should’ve been me!” I roared as he hit the ground, his eyes darkening with his own rage as he peered up at me from the concrete. “Well, it wasn’t and she’s alive because of me. I understand your rage and need to hit me, but it better not happen again. It isn’t very often that I let a man draw my blood without death being right around the corner.” He spat on the ground, a mixture of blood and saliva hitting the cement. I didn’t have time for this shit. I needed to find out

where Ellie was. I needed to protect her. It was no longer Tuck’s job. Ellie was mine, and I would make it known from here on out. “I don’t have time for this or you.” I cracked my knuckles and rolled my shoulders. I was ready to hurt Tuck if I had to, and I would to get to her. I had never had a problem killing for work, so imagine the things I would do for love. Still I couldn’t ruin things with him. He could consider the debt settled because not killing his ass would be his only saving grace. With one last glance at Tuck, I headed down the alleyway, away from him. If I stayed standing there, I would destroy him and my only chance of

getting her back. “Jesus Christ, Grayson! I’m under-fucking-cover, okay?” Tuck’s loud footfalls sounded behind me, as did the sound of his heavy breathing. I stopped dead in my tracks, leaning my head back and gazing up at the sky. What had I done to deserve this life? Lie upon lie. They were compounding. “I’m working with the NYPD and the FBI, Gray. I’ve taken more hits for you than you will ever know, from telling them your kills were mine so they wouldn’t be warranted in trying to take down everyone but so you can have another life free of them all. I couldn’t just fucking tell you my plan. There is

more to this than you know. Hell, I shouldn’t even be speaking of it now, but I'm trying to give you some semblance of who I really am.” Tuck surrendered the truth, the heavy weight he’d been harboring upon his shoulders for years— fleeing instantly. I averted my attention to anything but him as I turned to face him. I couldn’t look at him and know that everything was a lie. “Would you have told me if you weren’t backed into a corner?” I asked. The answer to this question would let me know where we really stood. “Eventually, yes.” “Eventually,” I slowly repeated, drawing out each syllable of the word. This was too much, too soon.

Ellie was alive, and that was all I needed to know right now. Tuck’s secret would stay safe with me, but I couldn’t do this with him. At least not now. “I’ll be in touch with you. I need to see Ellie, but first, I need to get myself together before I make a random my next kill,” I commanded, walking away from Tuck with one thing on my mind; this changed everything.

One a scale of one to hating my life right now, I was really high on the hating my life end. Day in and day out involved doing nothing in particular, and anything that involved being around Stephanie or with Tuck I refused to do. It was too strange, especially after everything that had happened between Stephanie and I.

Still, I couldn’t say I hated Stephanie because I didn’t really know her for who she was. I could say that I didn’t agree with her living this secret fake life for years and the sacrifices that Grayson made for her. Her death changed everything in his eyes. The shit got even deeper because I couldn’t talk to Tuck about any of the chaotic things running through my mind. I couldn’t even state how I felt about Stephanie without feeling like a knife was going to be placed in my back. “What business did you have to tend to?” I questioned, my attitude less than stellar. Tuck turned around, looking around the room to see

where Stephanie was I was sure. “Bitchy much?” I hadn’t missed the slight bruising that marred his cheek when he walked in the door, or the aggression in his steps as he walked around like he had a stick up his ass or a secret to keep. “Liar much. I mean we both know that already, though.” I smiled smugly at him, waiting for him to break down and tell me what the hell went down, and how he got the bruise on his face. Which worked for him in a way. He seemed more rugged with a bruise, like a precious stone that was all perfect and polished but had been dropped and shattered. The jagged edges showing just enough to give it a roughness that you

almost wanted to reach out and touch. “First, I have to deal with him, now I have to deal with you,” he muttered, crossing the kitchen, only stopping when he was directly in front of me. I didn’t know what Stephanie was doing, but if he didn’t start talking she would end up hearing everything and I didn’t want her knowing anything more than she already did when it concerned me and Grayson. “Of course, you do.” I tilted my head at him. “You brought me here. I have to deal with you too, so don’t act like you’re the only one that is coping with the bullshit called our lives.” “Grayson and I had a scuffle, okay? Is

that what you wanted to hear? I saved your life, and in telling him he tried to kick my ass.” Tuck furrowed his brows as frustration sank into his features. I’m sure years of hiding and the weight of keeping all those secrets were taking its toll on his mental and emotional health. The guy was almost carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. I felt for him, I knew what hiding your true self day in and day out could do to your mind. “Not really. I wanted to hear that you’re taking me to him now.” I cleared my throat just as Stephanie walked in the room. Something about the way she carried herself rubbed me the wrong way. It probably had everything

to do with the fact that I loved her brother which caused my guard to be up when it came to her. The same way he would protect me at all costs, I would do the same for him in return. Tuck narrowed his eyes at me, a lingering of unsaid words between us. Did he think I was stupid enough to bring Grayson up in front of her? I might not know the whole fucking story of what was going on between him and Stephanie, but I knew to watch her carefully, if only for the sake of Grayson. “What’s going on out here?” Stephanie chimed in, coming up behind Tuck and wrapping her arms around his mid-section like she loved him or some shit. The saliva in my mouth turned to a

paste. I got it now, she was with him, like dating him. Which made things way fucking worse. “I was just letting Ellie know that a car is coming to get her here shortly and taking her to a special location,” Tuck spoke, his words forced. “Mhm. I’m finally leaving this hell.” I laughed, shifting my eyes to Grayson’s sister. God, I needed to like her. I had too, but every time I saw her acid climbed my throat and burned the goodness right out of me. She made everything he had done for her pointless. To me, she was just as good as dead. “Awe, we were just getting to know each other. Is she leaving for good? I thought she was being protected

too?” she asked innocently as if she had no idea what was taking place. Her innocence might work with Tuck, but I could see straight through the bullshit she spewed. “No. She’ll be back. Maybe then you guys can pick up right where you left off?” Tuck asked, directing the question at me. I blinked slowly at him, wondering if the way we were truly acting towards one another had fooled him. He was an undercover agent, if he wasn’t on to the fact we didn’t really click then he sucked at his job. “Yes! I would love that,” Stephanie lied, her voice over the top cheery, and of course, I smiled right

back. We were a fucked up bunch of people. “Good. Now get ready, Ellie,” Tuck dismissed me like nothing. Like there wasn’t unsaid words between us. Instead, he directed his attention back to Stephanie, wrapping his arms around the back of her. I could see a conniving little plan running rampant in her mind as a smile lingered on her lips. It was as if she had everyone but me fooled to the kind of person she was. The burden of everything was starting to eat away at me. Grayson knew I was alive. I was angry that he wasn’t here trying to get me, but then again my father was after both of us. He knew

better than anyone that us being together would only make it easier for them. Make us any easier target. Get us both together and you could kill two birds with one stone, yet something in both of us refused to stay away from the other. Scurrying down the hall and into the bedroom Tuck had put me in, I closed the door. I slipped out of my clothes and headed into the bathroom. Maybe a nice hot shower would release some of the tension in my body. Knowing that Grayson knew I was alive now had removed an enormous weight that had mounted inside me. Still the things that he had said to me before they took me away lingered at the back of my mind. I knew

he didn’t mean now, at least I did at this point but I couldn’t make the ache in my heart go away that his words had caused. Was I really that insecure? The truth, if I was being honest with myself, was yes. I was insecure about everything. I didn’t know if his feelings would change or if they had already changed. I didn’t even know if he would be the same person he was now once he found out the truth about his sister. Romance had never been something I did. I didn’t even know what real love was, but if I could have a chance at it or a chance at experiencing it, I would want it to be with no one other than Grayson. Turning on the shower, I

waited for the water to warm before I stepped into the spray. Forcing myself to stop thinking about it all, my mind stayed on one thing. There was no way Grayson had changed his mind about me. I would know. I would feel it. *** “The car is here,” Stephanie yelled from the living room. I could tell just in the tone of her voice that she was far more excited than she should be at the fact that I was leaving. “Thanks, Mom,” I mocked, shooting her a dirty look. I had slipped into a pair of dark jeans and a black hoodie with a pair of chucks that Tuck

had picked up for me. Waving goodbye to Tuck, I headed out to the blacked-out car that he had sent for me. I didn’t know where I was going, but I trusted Tuck enough to know that he wouldn’t let anything happen to me. “Good Afternoon, Ms. Goodwin,” the driver spoke softly to me. Confusion settled into my features, which must’ve been really readable because he stared at me for a moment longer than expected. “Ummm…” I shook my head, getting into the car unsure of what to say. By the time my butt had become acquainted with the luxury leather seat, my door was closing and we were taking

off shortly after. The drive was short and somewhat peaceful. We went through the countryside and down some backroads before coming into one of the suburbs that made up New York City. Time continued to fly by during my ride. In a matter of ten minutes of being in the city, we were pulling into an underground parking garage. As soon as the darkness settled in the car, my insides turned to sludge. “Where are we exactly?” I asked the driver, knowing I probably wouldn’t get a detailed answer. I trusted Tuck, but now I was starting to wonder if I should continue to. “The Pierre,” he responded as if I knew what it was and

where the hell it was located. Still his eyes clashed with mine in the rearview mirror. In them, I could sense some type of hesitation but couldn’t connect it to what could possibly be occurring. My eyes surveyed the parking garage where numerous high-end vehicles were parked. I wanted to see if there was anything odd, anything that would give me a hint as to what was going on. Pulling into a parking spot, the driver pulled a piece of paper out and jotted down some information before lifting it over the seat and handing it to me. “What’s this?” I questioned, looking down at the simple writing. The number 3 and then 6 and

601 were the only things written on the paper. Could it be a code of some sort or maybe a hotel number? Or possibly a lockbox? My mind was racing with all the different things it could be. “This is where my part of the journey ends and yours begins. Go over to that door and up to the sixth floor using the stairwell. Find the room number and knock three times.” The driver didn’t look at me as he spoke but simply gripped the steering wheel tightly in his hands as he looked around uncaring that I was still in the car. Gripping the door handle as if it could hold me to this very moment, I opened the door and got out of the car. Putting both feet in front of the

other, I pushed the feelings that were brewing in my belly away. Floor six. Room 601. Knock three times. Slamming the door behind me, I headed straight for the door on the other side of the garage, my feet beating against the pavement loudly. Once I reached the entrance door and opened it, I glanced backward to see if the driver was still there. I shouldn’t have because right where the car was previously parked was nothing but an empty space. “Asshole,” I muttered under my breath. He didn’t even have the patience, let alone the audacity, to wait and see that I made it inside okay. With

everything going on, I knew that I shouldn’t care, but being that it was someone that Tuck probably paid I did. So much for protection, I thought as I turned back around and headed towards the man I loved, hoping he was still that man.

I knew I didn’t deserve anything above what I had already been given in my life. I fucked everything up at least once, and if not once then twice for extra measure. The thing with Ellie was more than just a fuck up. I didn’t want to screw it up any more than the circumstances surrounding us had.

Finding out she was alive was the game changer. I would kill for her. I would bleed for her. I would rather them take me instead of her, do anything to keep her alive and the guilt out of my heart. I had another chance. A chance to end their lives and make them pay. A chance to show Ellie what she really meant to me, and that my words before she was taken were said only to protect her. That’s why I called Tuck and told him to let me see her, at least once before everything went down. I wanted to make it right with her. No. I had to make it right with her. That’s why I was doing

what I was right now. Sitting in my hotel room on my bed twiddling my thumbs while I waited for three knocks on my room door. Tuck had set everything up; from the car to her clothes, down to how I would know it was her. As soon I as heard the three knocks, I scrambled from the bed and to the door like fire was under my ass. I was ready to see her, ready to hold her, and tell her how sorry I was for everything that had happened. Ripping the door open, my eyes caught her blue ones and we stayed staring at one another for what seemed like an eternity. I had so much I wanted to tell her, but at the same time, nothing I could say would ease the pain or change things. I needed more than words to

explain what I wanted to say. I needed lips, hands, entangled tongues, and hours upon endless hours inside of her. Her face lit up as she looked me up and down, doing the same thing to me as I was to her. She’s beautiful, the most beautiful woman I’d ever laid eyes on even wearing simple clothing, and the discoloration from her bruises diminishing from her flesh. “Seeing you here in the flesh…” I sighed, lifting my hand and tracing the side of her face with it. She leaned into my touch with on a exhale, as if to say she had missed me just as much as I missed her. “Don’t talk,” she mumbled, pushing me back into the hotel room and

following me in. The door slammed behind us, and I wasn’t sure what was going through her head. Was she still angry at me for the words I had spoken that night? Did she just want to ignore the issue we needed to address or just not want to talk at all right now? “I can’t not talk to you, Ellie. I thought you were dead, and it killed me. It broke something inside of me,” I whispered, grabbing her by the waist and pulling her against my chest. Her scent surrounded me. Vanilla. God, how I missed that fucking smell. I buried my nose against her throat, my nostrils flaring as I took in deep breaths of her scent. I was crazed. A man on a mission to show love.

“I don’t mean it like that, Grayson. I mean I don’t want to talk right now. I want to feel.” Her tongue darted out across her lips, and even though her eyes were melting into mine I could practically feel the heat pooling between her thighs, and I hadn’t even touched her there yet. Still I wanted her to know that the reason she was here had nothing to do with sex. I just wanted her close, even if it was just for one night. Pulling away so I could look her straight in the eyes, I peered down at her. “This isn’t why you’re here, Ellie. Sex isn’t what I had Tuck send you here for. I wanted you to know that what happened, everything that I

said to you that night wasn’t real. I didn’t mean it.” I gripped her under the chin, making sure she couldn’t miss the words I was saying. She needed to understand that I never meant to hurt her. With more trust than she should ever give me lingering in her eyes, she spoke almost in a hushed voice, “I already knew that, Grayson. At first, I was so blinded by hurt that I sort of believed it and questioned why you would say such things. But as the days passed and the fog cleared, I said your words for what they really were, and now that hurt I was experiencing is slowly disappearing.” My chest filled with joy, and the black hole that had formed from losing her started to close.

No longer was I being pulled apart, now I was being pieced back together. Ellie was healing me with every word she spoke. Then she did something completely unexpected. She took control, her body, mind, and soul on a crash course with mine. Her soft lips clashed with my hard ones, her hands skimming across every piece of me as if she was trying to map out the pieces of my body. “I missed you so fucking much,” I growled, my fingers weaving through her long hair. I had to have her. She was like a drug to me. Her kisses made me high. Her voice soothed me. Her love made me whole again. “Mmmm…” she purred,

pulling at my shirt just as I let go of her to pull her shirt and pants off. Her panties and bra came next as I rivaled in the fact that she was not only naked but that she was all mine for the taking. Our eyes locked again as she grabbed my hand, pulling me towards the hotel room bed. Again, I almost stopped. I hadn’t ever wanted this to be where we would be. I wanted a good life with Ellie, a future. Yet, here we were in this hotel, sneaking around, hiding from her father, Drake, and the brotherhood, because death was lurking at every corner. “Stop thinking. Stop analyzing.” Ellie’s soft hand cupped my cheek, turning my face into hers. It was

such a soft gesture it almost brought tears to my eyes. “Thank you,” I managed to get the words out as I pulled my clothing off and softly pushed her against the bed. She smiled up at me, her eyes bright and full of eager will. My hands slid across her shoulders and over her pink rosy nipples. I tugged on them gently, allowing them to slip between my thumb and forefinger repeatedly. Ellie’s back bowed off the bed, her head turning to the side as she allowed a moan to leave her throat. I couldn’t help the smile that formed on my face. It didn’t seem real, having her here right now. I

continued to tell myself that as I released her nipples and trailed my fingers down between her legs. “No matter what, this will always belong to me,” I snarled, placing a harsh kiss against her lips as I slipped a finger inside her. Her tightness was almost my undoing. She clenched around me, her lids drifting closed, and I could tell she was on the verge of coming. “It will always be yours.” I could barely comprehend what it was that she said because of her moans. Every slip of my finger in and out pushed her closer and closer, her body telling me exactly what she needed next with every stroke. “It better be,” I grunted out,

my cock growing hard as steel. I needed relief, and I needed it soon. As soon as her core turned to molten lava and she was ready for me, I flipped her onto her belly. She landed with a soft thump, and a breathy moan escaped her lips. Lifting my hand, I traced over her back, my fingers gliding over soft, supple flesh. Her body was that of a goddess, and I would worship it as so. If I were given the chance to have her for the rest of my life, I would remind her of that every damn day. “Grayson, I need you,” she begged, looking at me over her shoulder. Her eyes were filled with lust, her teeth sinking into her bottom lip. I slipped a finger down between her folds, only to

realize she was wetter than she had been before. My cock jutted between us, leaking pre-cum at the tip. Grabbing a condom from my wallet, I stroked my cock once, twice, circling the head as I ripped the foil with my mouth. As I slid on the condom, I noticed that her eyes were on me the entire time. “I need you too,” I moaned as I slid into the hilt, my balls hitting her clit. I could feel every inch of her body as I pressed her firmly into the mattress. I gave her a moment to adjust to me before I started moving again. She slid her hand around, gripping the back of my ass as if to get me moving. “Fuck me, please…” she

said the words face down into the mattress. I could tell she needed and wanted so much more, and I wasn’t complaining. I couldn’t take another moment of stillness. Pulling out of her slowly, I slammed back into her, scooting her up the mattress with every shove of my body into hers. Her hands reached up and pressed against the headboard for leverage. “Ahhh….” Ellie mewled. Her pussy gripping my cock like a vice. It had never been this good, never. “You feel so fucking perfect. So mine.” I nipped at her ear, my teeth sinking into her flesh as I slammed into her fiercely. Our bodies

slapped together, coming as one as our souls mingled together. Sweat covered my body as I forced myself to hold off on coming. “I’m…” she purred, her breaths were coming out as pants, and her nails were digging into the wooden headboard. “Come, baby, come all over my cock. Mark yourself on me,” I moaned as she clenched around me, a throbbing sensation working its way up my cock. A tingling sensation filled my belly and went down my groin and then to my toes. I gripped her hips, slipping deeper into the abyss. They say in the waves of

change, we truly find our own direction. I knew that was true with Ellie. She was my compass, and as long as she pointed north I would be okay. “I love you,” I whispered into her ear as I came, pouring every piece of me into her. I would never be the same, in death or life.

I used to believe that God gave you the life he believed you should have. After all, my father was a man of faith. I wasn’t sure how he could still believe he was going to heaven with all the deaths that were under his belt, but either way, he taught me that. He was

wrong, though. We both were. God didn’t give you the life he believed you should have. You made certain choices along the way that put you on your own path. If you found love, it was because you wanted to. If you were poor, it was simply a circumstance, just another wall to climb. I wasn’t stuck on the path that God or my father put me on. At least not anymore. I was creating my own path. Setting myself free from the destruction called my past. Looking at Grayson’s sleeping form, I knew I could do anything that I put my mind to. He had proved that to me. I stared at him for a long while, the creases on his face were

longer and seemed to be causing wrinkles. His beard had grown fuller, his hair even more unruly, and he looked as if he had lost weight since the last time I’d seen him. Yet my mouth watered as my vision headed south toward a still very chiseled chest and abs. I never knew how a man like Grayson could be so beautiful. It wasn’t that he couldn’t be beautiful, it was that he was too rugged to be seen as beautiful. He was a hidden, rare gem that I didn’t feel I deserved but was given anyhow. “Do you always stare at people while they’re sleeping?” His voice was gruff and full of sleep. I clenched my chest, my body heating all

over as my cheeks grew pink. And here I was ogling him, unaware that he had been watching me the entire time. “Sometimes.” I smiled smugly. Grayson stretchered his arms above his head and every muscle on his body seemed to expand and slim out showing all the contours of his body. Butterflies released in my belly, and my hands fisted the sheet. “You had no clue what you were doing when you agreed to be mine.” He smirked, his words more of a statement than anything. “You had no clue what you were doing when you came up to me that night in the club looking for a good time,” I shot back, nibbling on my

bottom lip. He moved from a laying position to sitting in a second flat, his face stopping right in front of mine. Everything seemed to be normal, or as normal as it could get, but even I knew that none of this would last. There were no happily ever after’s in the darkness. There could be no happiness when the sun couldn’t reach you. “Stay out of that pretty little head of yours for five minutes,” Grayson muttered, placing a piece of my hair back behind my ear, his fingertips brushing against my skin. An electric current flowed between us as his fingers slid across my skin.

“I can’t help but think after today, after this, that everything will still be the same as it was yesterday,” I stuttered. I knew I had to leave in the morning. None of us had heard from my father or Drake, at least not that I knew of, and the chances that they were lurking and waiting for the perfect time to strike were pretty high. “Tuck’s been in touch with Drake. They’re looking high and low for you and I both. They expect us to be together which is why we can’t be seen together. In all seriousness, we shouldn’t even be together right now.” He sighed, tilting my chin up to meet his eyes. I could feel tears forming, threatening to fall, but I brushed them away before they

could. “I don’t want to lose you again. To lose anyone, anymore,” I cried out, my emotions running wild. “Shhh. I will never be far. Never. Not after what happened. I promised you revenge on that basement floor.” Anger flooded his eyes. “I promised you that you would never have to live in fear of those people again.” The grip he had on my chin grew tight as he continued to speak. “I don’t break promises, Ellie. When I say I’m going to do something, I do it.” I couldn’t pull away from him, not even if I wanted to. All I could do was lean into his warm touch and

pray that we would both have a tomorrow together. “Just promise me you won’t live in guilt if anything happens to me,” I said the words quietly. A deep exhale of air filled the room, and I waited for him to say something. When he did it was the last thing I expected. “I promise to never live in guilt. I can’t when I have you right by my side. I know nothing will happen to you because I will be there every fucking step of the way protecting you.” I could see the savage he hid so well from everyone. The person that people on the other side of death only saw, and the worst part about that was that I craved

him. I wanted to sink my teeth into him and bite down. I wanted him to become one with me because then I would have felt every single thing he had. “I want your rage, your anger, and pain. I want your love and passion. I want everything that makes you who you are. I want you to let go of that hate. That person deep down inside of you that says you have to do something because you can’t handle the pain.” Grayson looked at me with amazement in his eyes, the blue of them deepening with every passing second. Then he leaned into me, his forehead

against my own. “I can’t let go of any of it until they’re all dead. With their death’s comes the ending to all that pain. When your father and Drake face their own deaths, only then can I release the demons that hide inside.” His attention drifted down to my lips and then down to my naked breast. My heart was beating out of my chest as he slid his hand down my shoulder and onto my chest, stopping once he reached my heart. “I just want you to be happy.” My lip trembled. I had nothing to be afraid of, other than fear itself, but I couldn’t stop the anxiety coming alive within me.

“I am happy,” he replied, bending down to take one of my nipples into his mouth. All thoughts were thrown out the window the second his tongue swirled around my areola. My hands automatically had a mind of their own, going straight for his full head of hair. I tugged on the dark strands, my belly filling with passion and desires that were darker than my past. When you loved someone you had something to fear. You had something someone could take, something they could use to break you. Grayson loving his sister did that to him. Now I would do the same; now I would be the reason he would be weak once more.

“Stay with me, Ellie. Stay with me,” he begged, pushing me backward onto the bed before shifting himself between my knees. I looked up at him with so many different emotions running through my head. “I’ll try,” I mumbled, and with a look of determination, he placed his hands on my thighs, pulling them apart gently. His head disappeared between my legs, his fingers and tongue strumming every single piece of me. Tension filled my belly, my eyes fluttered shut, and my toes curled. “You’re so beautiful when you fall to pieces for me.” His voice was muffled against my skin. I could feel the love in every single stroke, suckle,

and kiss. My fingers stayed in his hair, holding him in place, grinding myself against his face. We clung to each other, so much desire, so much passion brewing between us. Holding one another, we knew this could be the end; we also knew it could be a new beginning. No one knew what cards we would be dealt or what would come in the future. All we could do was hold onto the present and hope for a better future. A future with both of us in it.

“I tried telling you that things would be different with her, Tuck,” I mumbled into the phone as I hustled down the street to the coffee shop Tuck and I had met at the day before. The streets were busy as they always were in New York, but today

they seemed to be more bustling than normal. Before Ellie was brought to me, I had to convince Tuck that it was okay for her to see me. He was worried about her reaction to everything that had already happened. I knew he thought that I was letting my heart rule my emotions, but he was wrong. I was just showing Ellie a part of me she had always deserved. “She’s different, yes. Not as insecure. She feels safe with you, and that’s the problem. Safety is nothing but a false sense of hope. The darkness that has followed her all these years is just within grabbing distance.” Tuck lectured like I had no idea what I was doing. Again, he was going on about how I was

letting my emotions rule this. I wasn’t, I had killed people for the better part of my life, watched the life bleed out of them and the light around them turn dark all at my hands. I knew that the safety net surrounding us at this very moment was nothing more than a false sense of hope, something that we created all on our own. I didn’t need him telling me so. Still Ellie and I both understood what was on the other side of that door. Would we truly ever be safe and be able to be together with her father and Drake out there? The answer would always be no. I shifted the phone to my other ear while I scanned the crowd of people in front of me. “I’m not dumb. You forget who I

used to be… Who I still am.” Saying the words out loud seemed to make them more real, and as much as it was a reminder for Tuck, it was one for me as well. “Just because you used to kill people every day doesn’t really change things. You can go soft for those you love, just like that. One slip up, Gray, and that’s it. It takes a strong mind and a heart lacking emotion that keeps your head in the game.” This lecturing from him was getting old and real fast. He was worse than a nagging mother, afraid to let her child grow up. “My emotions are in check. I’m not going to make any rash decisions. But I refuse to lose Ellie again.”

Annoyance filled my voice at the thought alone. “Right. Well, there is a reason you had no idea I was an FBI agent. I kept my emotions in check, any personal feelings at bay because had I let my morals get in the way. I would have failed every test that the brotherhood threw my way to make sure I was worthy to join them.” Tuck carried on as if I was listening. I took that time to order two coffees and pick out some donuts for Ellie and I. “You hid it well. That doesn’t mean it didn’t eat away at you. I have guilt for the shit that I have done as well, but I’m not going to not show Ellie how I feel about her, just on the off chance that

they come for us again. Life is too short. I’m starting to realize that. After I lost my parents’ and then my sister…” I trailed off. Talking about them always caused a lump to form in my throat. Death wasn’t easy. At least, for the people that it left behind. I knew Tuck understood that. He lost people of his own I was sure. “Stay out of your head, and take care of what needs to be done. Your heart will lead you to make a decision out of love. You need to be on your toes. I’ve already let Drake know one of my contacts had spotted you. I just gave him the completely opposite side of town to look over so he wouldn’t get suspicious. I’m thinking we I pretend I found you

and bring you in. It’ll at least get us inside their doors. They knew we were friends, but I’d been with them way before our friendship formed, so they automatically assume my loyalties lie with them. Especially after the act I’ve been putting on for them.” Tuck almost seemed to be whispering into the phone, as if there was someone with him that he didn’t want to hear him talking. “Alright, Chief. I’ll talk to you later,” I said, ending the call before Tuck even responded. I paid for my items and grabbed them off the counter, getting ready to head back to the hotel. I had just walked out of the café when I felt eyes on me. Looking around quickly, no one seemed

out of place or stuck out in my mind. The hotel wasn’t but a five-minute walk away, so I blew off what I was feeling as stubborn paranoia after doing another scan and only coming up empty. She’s fine, I thought to myself as I crossed the street. There was a nervous edge in my bones, hell even to my movements. I was like a mouse scurrying across the street, attempting not to get caught in the mousetrap. I headed inside the hotel just as it started to rain. Cool droplets hit against my skin, reminding me of how alive I truly was. I hadn’t felt this way in months, and after losing Ellie only to find her again I was grateful for the

breath that filled my lungs. It was strange how you enjoyed those little things more when you had something to live for. I entered the stairwell, taking the steps two at a time, my heart beating out of my chest the entire time. I had spent the past twenty-four hours with her and it was incredible. Tuck had wanted her back first thing this morning, even before the sun rose, but I refused, instead demanding that she stay a full twenty-four hours with me before we risked everything once again. After all, I need this time. It was precious, every minute we would spend together and had already. A slow smile eased upon my face as I reminisced. I felt like her skin was a part of mine. Every part that we

connected at had us growing closer together. It was more than just sex with her. It was an art of love. An intense explosion of emotions that caused you to not think but simply feel. It showed me just how much I wanted there to be a tomorrow, maybe even a forever if we could get ourselves out of this mess. I didn’t know how to be a boyfriend or lover really. I had no examples to go off of, but I would do whatever I could to make things the best that they could be every day of our lives together. I forced myself to stop thinking inside my own head for a moment. Tuck was right, partially, and I

hated to admit it. I needed to stay focused. The emotions from having her back in my life were a bit overwhelming, and I needed to get us out of this mess without letting my feelings get in the way of rationally thinking. My feet hit the sixth-floor stairwell, and I opened the door at the top of the steps, heading down the hall towards our hotel room. Blood pumped through my body as if it were thriving for her, and my heart sped up its rhythmic beating at the mere thought of getting to see Ellie in all her glory. Her hair would be a tangled mess of beauty, her eyes heavy with sleep, and her lips bruised from my own lips.

I couldn’t get over her being mine and the feelings that it caused. Feelings that I wanted to last forever. Feelings that all but diminished the second I came to our door. The first sign that something was up was the fact that the door was slightly ajar. Fear rose deep in my chest as I slowly pushed the door completely open and stepped in. The coffees in my hands hit the ground, staining the expensive carpet that covered the floor of the room. My brain couldn’t even comprehend the destruction of the room, all I cared about was if they had gotten Ellie or not. “Ellie?” I yelled, running

throughout the room, opening every closet,= and even going as far as to look underneath the bed. There was no trace of her ever being here, not even her clothes. Everything was gone. Including her. Panic started to set in because as much as I didn’t want to think that they could’ve found her, I knew they could. Fear wanted to take root inside of me but I pushed it away, knowing that anger is what I really needed to fuel my rage. Therefore, I thought of the fact that they touched something that wasn’t theirs. They took something of mine, and now I was going to kill all of them, every single fucking one of them.

Blood would be shed in honor of them fucking with the wrong person. I walked over to the desk and withdrew my gun and knife from the Velcro that attached it safely underneath. Then I texted Tuck, letting him know they had her. It was time to go to war, and I wouldn’t stop until I had taken the life from all my enemies.

“You’ve been promised to me,” Drake stated as if telling me what my father said made it true. That wasn’t the case because as soon as I got the chance I would be leaving. Running and going into hiding if I had to. If I stayed it meant death. If I left it meant death. No matter what

I did I would be signing my own death certificate. But regardless, I couldn’t marry Drake or stay here and be under my father’s thumb any longer. Shaking my head no, I watched as he stepped directly in front of me. His hand reaching up and locking around my jaw. “You aren’t listening, little girl!” Drake’s saliva slapped me in the face as he spoke, his fingers digging into my flesh as he held my face in line with his. There was so much evil in him, nothing but a pool of blackness under the surface. How could a father want their only daughter, let alone only child to marry that? Drake’s nostrils flared

with anger and he looked away from me for a moment. He was trying to gain composure so he didn’t beat me until bruises covered the majority of my body again. My father had been upset with all the bruising he saw the last time Drake got upset with me. Not because some man had put their hands on his little girl, rather they had done so right before an important meeting with some very wealthy men that I was requested to attend to entertain one guy in particular. “I’m trying really fucking hard not to mess up this beautiful little face of yours.” His words were like venom from a snakebite paralyzing me every time he spoke. Hate wasn’t even a

word I could use to state how I felt about him. All I knew was that I had never wished death on a person as much as I did him. “Kill me,” I whispered the words to him, my eyes cast down. He wouldn’t do it. He couldn’t. He needed me alive. I was his reason for existing, and when I was gone my father would rid him of his life. There was always a replacement for someone. His thumb ran across my bottom lip, and it took everything in me not to bite him. I wanted to sink my teeth into him and draw his blood, to hurt him like he had me. In the beginning, I was fooled by his charm, his smile, and charisma. I learned

rather quickly it was a façade. He was nothing but a lie. Waiting, I watched as he leaned into my face even more, his eyes filled with fury as we came nose to nose. “Killing you would give you the easy way out. The painless way out, and we both know I’m all about the pain, Ellie.” His smile was sinister, and my legs started to give out on me at the mere memory of the pain he could bring and the fear he was trying to invoke in me. “I will never be yours,” I spoke softly, not wanting to give him a reason to lay his hand against my cheek. I hated to submit to the pain, to beg for him to stop because I could feel

the weakness that consumed me. I was weak. I knew it, and so did everyone else in this house. It’s why I was still here, and why I was still being used. Drake’s gruff laughter filled the room, and a cool chill covered my body as he spoke, “You don’t have to like it, or even want it, but it’s going to happen. Take it as it is, Ellie, or I will end your life as slowly.” He pulled me into his face by the back of my head, a stinging sensation ripping at my scalp. “And painfully as possible. I will make you beg for death, and then I will keep you alive, just to let you watch me repeat the process. So

pretend that you aren’t mine, but know deep down inside of that pitiful excuse of a woman that you are, that I don’t need your permission. You will be mine if I say you’re mine.” By the time his words had ceased, I was crying, bawling on the inside as the first tear drops spilled from inside of me onto my cheeks. My body wanted to give up on me, my mind wanted to close down. Emotionally I was gone. I knew I was damaged and always would be. Drake had made certain of that. “I will never be yours.” Those were the words that sealed the deal. One moment I was standing and

the next I was on the ground, the side of my head throbbing as if a brick had been thrown against it. My eyes zoned in and out, and sweat clung to my brow. It wouldn’t be the first time he tried to kill me, but it would be the last. “Never talk back to me!” he commanded. I could feel the point of his shoe against my stomach as he kicked me. I wanted to scream out in agony, but the woman I so desperately wanted to become fought her way out of me and wouldn’t let me. I was stronger than that. Instead, I fell to pieces on the inside, letting the darkness swallow me hole. They wanted me weak so that I could never run. They wanted me afraid

so I would cower in fear to them. Most of the time I was afraid, but today, today I had, had enough. Today I was going to be a free woman. I shifted in the bed, my eyes popping open as sunlight filtered in through the window across the room. I stretched out, reaching for Grayson but coming up with nothing but air and cool sheets. My heart was still beating out of my chest as I tried to figure out why after such an amazing night spent with Grayson, memories of my horrible past with Drake would resurface. My fingers continued to skim across the sheet only to come across a piece of paper. I grabbed a hold of it, turning it over in my hand so I

could read it. The memory of Drake and all that had occurred in that dream faded quickly as I read the note. Ellie, brb. Left to get food, shouldn’t be long. Keep those sheets warm for me, baby. P.S. Please stay in the room, again I'll be right back. P.S.S Ignore the bathroom. Had to let my anger out somewhere. Love always, Gray Every part of my body that touched his last night hummed to life. The kisses he laid across every ounce of my skin, the way he claimed me as his

own, taking control and giving to me only as he felt I needed was a night I would always cherish. Reading over the note again, I realized what he said about the bathroom, and curiously I got up to look at it, but not before grabbing one of his shirts off the floor and slid into it. His smell encompassed me almost immediately, wrapping me a blanket of comfort. Crossing the room, I grabbed the door handle to the bathroom and pushed it open. The door stopped about half way, and I was unable to see what was on the other side that was causing it not to open completely. However, from the small amount I could see into the room I

knew that it had been demolished. Pieces of glass were scattered all over the marble floor as if someone had smashed their fist into it over and over. At that thought, I made a mental note to check out Grayson’s hands. Reaching my hand inside, I turned on the light, noticing instantly just how much glass had truly broken. “Stupid door,” I huffed, pressing more firmly against it to get it to open more. Two small shoves later the door opened just enough for me to enter. As I stepped inside I took in the chaos and destruction that could only be Grayson’s doing he spoke of in the note. Air left my lungs and my stomach sank as my eyes took in the dried blood all over the

bathroom. The room was completely torn apart. The scene caused my heart to clench because it proved just how upset and destroyed he was about losing me. In a way, it made me feel something inside because it showed he truly did love me. That everything he had previously said was truly false. Knowing there was nothing I could do to even try and clean up the mess, I simply closed the door and headed back towards the bed. But before I could crawl in and get comfortable, a knock at the door interrupted and startled me. It was probably Grayson. I imagined him standing on the other side of the door hands practically full.

“You know, you could’ve waken me up.” Sheer terror ran up my spine the second I opened the door. I wasn’t greeted with cold, cool blue eyes of the man I loved, but eyes that were far darker and were filled with a familiar rage. “You’re just as stupid as you always were.” Drake’s voice was like rusty nails piercing my flesh. Trying with all my might, I pushed the door into his face. My muscles ached as he shoved back causing me to land against the floor. This couldn’t be happening. Not again. “Get out. Leave!” I screamed as I scurried backward on the floor, the carpet burning my skin like acid. Drake

just smiled mockingly, his footsteps falling heavily as he headed straight for me. “Now that I’m here and you seem to be very inviting, I think I’ll stay.” I could feel the bloodcurdling scream building in my throat. Someone had to hear all of the commotion, yet no one came running. I flipped over, landing firmly on my hands and knees before taking off, trying to put as much distance as I could between us. Pain ripped through my scalp as his hand sunk into my hair tightly. Where was Grayson? All I had to do was fight with Drake long enough, just until Grayson returned. He should be on his way back right now, I thought to myself,

my nails digging into the carpet as I fought against the hold he had on me. “Oh, you like it just as rough as you always have huh?” The scream that was lodged in my throat escaped, the noise echoing throughout the hotel room. “Stupid bitch!” Drake growled, letting go of my hair and slamming my face into the carpet. I could feel warmth dripping from my nose and onto my lips. I turned my face into the carpet, wiping my nose against it and looking down. Deep red met my eyesight, staining the carpet right before me. Seeing my blood being drawn caused something deep inside of me to rupture. Anger and hate like I had never felt before surged through me. The

moment Drake flipped me over so that I was face to face with him, I lifted my foot and slammed it into his face. The blow shoved him away from me long enough for me to get my bearings. I wiped the remaining blood from my face, my jaw clenched and clattering against my teeth as I got up off the floor. Rage filled his features. I knew if he got his hands on me again it would take every ounce of his will not to outright kill me. Putting more distance between us, I looked around the room for an item to use as a weapon against him. “That was ballsy, Ellie. Keep fighting, it only makes my dick happier to take what’s his.” He smiled sinisterly

as he wiped away a splotch of blood. This was a game to him. I was the prey and he was the lion. His movements were faster than I could handle. Before I could even think he was on me, his shoulder was hitting my stomach, the air rushing from my chest. We landed against the floor with a thud, his full body weight against mine. I wrestled with him to get up, but he just pressed harder into my body, his eyes pools of blackness. “Killing you will be the best thing I have ever done,” he hissed out, wrapping his hands around my throat. My eyes filled with tears, my throat slowly started to close up, and my lungs burned from the lack of oxygen. Still I

fought against the monster, even as the light turned to shadows. “Shhh, Ellie. Why fight it, baby? I got you now.” Drake’s tongue lapped up my tears, one by one. I stared him in the eyes, never breaking eye contact, not even as the darkness lurked waiting to take me under. The fight inside of me was slowly fading, my will fleeing. I was failing Grayson. I was becoming the bait they needed to catch him. At that thought my fingers wrapped around Drake’s and then I was clawing at him, trying to pull his hands away from my throat, if only for a second so that I could take in some air, but it was too late. Drake squeezed harder, sucking even more life right out

of me. I could only pray that someone heard my screams, or that Grayson would arrive before Drake sent me spiraling into the darkness. I had to survive this. I had to. Grayson would find me. He had to.

My muscles clenched and burned as I ran through the hotel. The contents in my stomach churned, and my throat burned. If they had her, or if they took her from me that would be the end of everything. I was hoping for the best, but envisioning her blood staining the carpet made me question everything.

“I called one of my buddies to see if he could help,” Tuck spoke, attempting to calm me down with his reassuring words that we would find her and make them pay, but that wasn’t enough. I wanted to be there now, taking them out. Making them fucking bleed. Tuck was buying us time, all while Ellie was going through hell. “I don’t care who you called. We never needed help before.” I slammed my fist against the wall. Pain radiated up my arm, but it didn’t care. I just needed to expel some of this aggression, so I could think more clear headed. “Look, Alzerro is one of the best FBI agents I have ever worked

with. He’s ex-mafia, and if anyone can find Ellie it’s going to be him. And stop doubting your woman’s will. Ellie is a strong fucking woman. She will fight every second that she can.” I rolled my eyes. “Right because the last thing we need is to be standing around with our fingers up our asses while we wait for an FBI agent to come and watch us take these fuckers out,” I barked at him, fury raging in my eyes.Tuck wasn’t being realistic at all. “Patience,” Tuck added, pulling his phone out of his pocket. I couldn’t just stand idly by and wait for these people to get here. I had an unmarked car, and I knew exactly where they would have taken her. They knew I

would be coming, so they would be expecting me. If Tuck was bringing back up, then I would be just fine by myself until they arrived. “I’m leaving,” I mumbled under my breath, heading out to the parking lot. Tuck had us at one of his secret locations. I should have waited for some type of clearance that it was safe to leave, or at the very least wait for Tuck. But nothing mattered to me anymore, not when they had the one thing that mattered the most to me. I would rip this whole fucking city a part to get to her. I would kill who ever I had to in order to feel her heart beat against my own again. “Leaving? You can’t go in

alone.” Tuck’s voice met my ears. I turned around only to come face to face with him. Did he really think I wouldn’t go in alone? “Who is going to stop me?” I tilted my head at him in a challenge. There was no way that he would stop me, at least not if he wanted to still be standing. I turned around and started walking again, pushing the key fob on my Lexus to unlock it. I had my weapons, and I would kill as many as I could on my own. “It’s a stupid idea, Grayson. A trap. One they’re expecting you to fall into.” Tuck sounded so sure of himself, as if he knew everything. The truth was he was more than right, but the

thing was I didn’t give a shit. Not when the woman’s life that I loved most was hanging in the balance. “No…” I stopped just as I reached my car. “What’s stupid is letting her go through this shit alone. When you fall in love with someone you’ll understand what I mean. Their pain becomes your pain. Their heartbeat becomes your heartbeat. You are one single being.” I had to ignore everything else he was saying, it didn’t matter. I didn’t have time to fuck around. Nothing he could say would stop me from going to her. Getting in the Lexus, I started the ignition right before shifting into

drive. Then I burned rubber out of the parking lot, shifting gears as I headed towards the interstate. My foot was heavy on the gas petal, reminding me that speed would only add to the heavy onset of adrenaline flowing in my blood stream. Five minutes later, I took my exit and followed the road to the industrial park. Ellie’s father owned a bunch of abandoned businesses, and it would be the first place he took her. It’s where he took all his hostages that he planned on murdering. I would know, I did the majority of the killing. I scanned the lots for any clues that would show me where they

were hiding away. It wasn’t until I reached the far end of the building that I noticed two black SUV’s parked in one of the parking lots. I gripped the steering wheel in my hands, the leather almost becoming one with my skin. My stomach was filled with knots as I parked the car and got out. I had to go in there and get her, even if I didn’t come out alive I knew I would be dying for something that was truly worth losing my life for. I strapped on two of my guns, picked out three knives, and then shifted my handgun from hand to hand before I closed the trunk of the car and walked to the entrance of the building. I wasn’t going to go in guns blazing, there

was no fucking point. But I wasn’t going in without any form of protection either. Fuck going in and surrendering myself, I was going in showing them that if I wanted to kill them I would have already done so before heading to the door. “We were expecting you, but I’m sure you already knew that.” Dex appeared out of nowhere, his gun aimed directly at my head. I had never been afraid of dying and I still wasn’t. It would happen when it was meant to. I expected the others to jump out of their hiding places as well but knew they probably would stay hidden, waiting for a cue or command. “You act as if I would let you take something of mine and get away

with it.” I stated, narrowing my eyes in rage. My gun weighed heavily in my hand, this could end one of two ways. “Yours?” Dex raised his eyebrows and shoved me in the shoulder, as if to tell me to move forward. “Mine.” I dug my feet into the ground and leaned into his face. “I’m here to get what is mine. What has always been mine, and if there is one fucking hair out of place on her head, I will fucking end your life…” I seethed. “Do you understand me, you incompetent asshole?” “If you don’t get the fuck inside, I will kill you right here and you won’t have to worry about…” I stopped

him before he could finish speaking, these assholes knew I had a short temper and didn’t have time to talk about shit. You got more done with your hands than with words. I grabbed him by the throat my fingers sinking into his flesh. I could feel his blood pumping and the beast inside of me wanted to end him, to watch his blood drip into the drain inside of this old dirty building. Dex’s eyes popped out of his head, but his gasps for air didn’t help the beast either. It just fed him, made him want more. “I’m still me underneath everything. I will still kill you. Hell, I’m going to just because you fucked with

something that was mine.” I gripped the gun in my hand, lifted it and placed it against his head. “You’ll die…” His words were strained, and I gripped his throat tighter out of pure need. “Welcome back, asshole.” A voice I knew sounded behind me, but before I could turn and see who it was I felt a sharp blow to the back of my head. My grasp on Dex released and I fell to the ground, the world spinning in and out of focus. “I thought we were a brotherhood, dude?” Cole’s menacing face came into focus right before his boot nailed me in the face and everything that was previously gray turned black.

They say when you’re dying your life will flash before your eyes, that all the happiness in your life will shine through while you’re in the process of going to the other side. The thing was, I had nothing but my time with Grayson to carry over to the other side, and that alone kept me awake and

fighting. I needed more memories, more good to take with me when it was my time to go. “Your little boy toy is here. He came to rescue you…” Drake’s eyes were furious, and his voice rose as he slapped me across the face. Blood continued to drip down my cheek, one of my eyes already swollen shut, but I was holding on for dear life. Holding on for Grayson. My head lolled to the side, resting against my shoulder. The binds that held my hands together dug in so tightly I was sure there would be cuts just from the material they used. I shut every single part of me off and went inside my own head, just like all the

other times I was forced to. It was easier to turn it off, to ignore it all. The pain would subside, and eventually I would become numb. I ignored Drake as he huffed and puffed around the room, and instead focused my attention on the drain on the floor. Oh, how I wanted it to be Drake’s and my father’s blood dripping down that drain instead of my own. “Thank God he set him on a path to end up right here where we wanted him to be!” My father walked in the room rubbing his hands together. His voice was overly cheery, his eyes roamed over my body for a moment before shifting to Drake. How could a father see their

daughter like this and it not matter to them? I wanted to scream from the highest building at him. Tell him that he wasn’t a father, nor a man to allow this to happen to me. I wanted to inflict pain upon him. I wanted him to feel the darkness and scars that he had caused upon my soul by letting Drake harm me. I wanted him dead, Drake included. I wanted all of them dead. “Fucking asshole thought he could squeeze the life out of Dex.” A youngish looking man that couldn’t be much older than me brought Grayson into the room. His name I was unsure of, I couldn’t recall it; that night was still coming to me in pieces. He placed him

on the ground with a hard thud. I looked around Drake to get a better look at Grayson, and a gasp filled my throat when I saw his face. Blood covered it, so much so that I wondered if he was still alive. I couldn’t help the words that came out of my mouth, “What did you do to him?” I yelled, my voice hoarse and raw. I hadn’t spoken since Drake took me from the hotel. “She fucking speaks, imagine that?” Drake’s slimy voice sounded heavily in my ears as he moved closer to me, his hand slipping up Grayson’s t-shirt, his fingers digging into the flesh of my thigh.

“Anyway, I took him out with a kick to the face. He thought he could come in here and own the fucking place?” the young looking guy spoke again. Drake’s fingers inched further up my thigh. I wanted to scream but instead bit the inside of my cheek, trying with all my might to keep my legs closed. He wouldn’t violate me in front of all these people, including my own father. Would he? “I want you to beg me to stop…” he whispered in my ear as he pressed his erection against my face. I turned away, my only eye that he hadn’t forced shut with his fists, closing in on Grayson. I could feel tears forming.

They wanted to fall so badly, but I refused to give him the satisfaction. His fingers slid up further, his thumb pushing against my bare entrance. Vomit rose in my throat, and there was nothing I could do to keep it at bay.. Turning towards Drake’s body, I spewed vomit onto his pants. Then a gargled laughed slipped from my throat as vomit clung to strands of my hair. Drake’s fingers dug into my skin even deeper, and as he pulled away from me, a burning sensation covered my inner thigh. “You fucking bitch.” I couldn’t do anything but take the fist as it flew towards my face. My entire

existence was lying across the room on the floor in a puddle of his own blood. I prayed that the next hit would take me out, that it would end the pain right here and right now. No world was truly worth living in if Grayson wasn’t in it. I understood the pain he felt back in the hotel. The reason he trashed that bathroom. “Enough, Drake. Pick him up and place him in one of the chairs. I’m expecting more to come, so be prepared men.” My father spoke with authority as he spewed orders. I stilled my body, waiting for the hit but it never came. Drake’s fist fell at my father’s halting words. For

once, he had intervened and I questioned it instantly. Was he trying to make me think I had one person on my side? I wasn’t stupid to believe he was; I knew the only person on my side in this room was Grayson. I cringed as they pulled him from the floor, removing all of his weapons and placing them on the table across the room before moving him into a chair next to me. His wrists were bound shortly after and his his ankles too. “Don’t kill him. Please,” I begged the younger man who had brought him in. He stopped in his tracks and looked up at me. I could see him judging me. Wondering what I had done

in my life to get myself in this situation. Would he believe me if I simply told him that the only thing I had done was be born? “That’s not up to me sweet cheeks…” He sighed, but still his eyes lingered on my face. He stared for a long moment, shaking his head before checking Grayson’s restraints. I felt helpless. There was no hope for us. No hope for a future. “If you kept your mouth shut more often then maybe you wouldn’t have all those bruises on your face,” he simply stated, as if I taunted Drake with my words. “That’s just it, I do.” I started to sob as Grayson’s unconscious

head moved from left to right. Not because I wanted anyone to feel sorry for me, but because the pain was too much. For once the burden of carrying the pain inside of me was overwhelming me. I had carried all this pain for years, and now it was like a bullet wound being ripped back open. I had been shot over and over again, but this time, this shot would be the one to kill me. “He’s going to die no matter what you do. You can beg and plead for mercy on him all you want, it doesn’t matter. The life you have right now will be all that you have left. Don’t you think you should give up hope of ever being free? Stop the tears and just follow the fated plan your father has

always had set for you. I’m sure Drake can be sweet, just moan a little and actually act like you want to spread those sweet ass thighs for him.” Cole winked at me, as if giving myself to Drake would save me. It wouldn’t. I’ve given myself freely to that monster of a man time and time again, in hopes that he would go easier on me, but it never worked. My willing submission was like a slap in the face. “Not even God can save me, what makes you think faking it with Drake will?!” I cried out, angry that he would even suggest such a thing. “Ellie, is that you?” Grayson’s voice sounded like a rusty chain rubbing together.

“Grayson…” I trailed off, amazement filling my voice as I tried to twist in my chair. “Oh, the happy couple is back y’all. How pathetic?” he spoke harshly, shaking his head in disgust. “Everything is dark…” He barely got the words out. It was then I realized his eyes weren’t even open. “Open your eyes,” I ordered, praying that he was okay. We both were strapped to chairs, our lives hanging in the hands of Satan himself. I knew there would be no stopping them from killing us both. At least we would die together. That would be the only chance we would truly have at a future.

“I can’t…” he murmured as my vision blurred and my head became heavy. I could barely keep my eyes open. My mind was becoming a foggy haze. I could hear people entering and exiting, but the voices were muffled and movement sounded far off. But I felt the change in the air, like a commotion was happening right before me and I just couldn’t see it. I felt like I was dying, the beat of my heart slowing. “I love you, Grayson,” I whispered softly, hoping my words reached his heart in time before I took my last breath. I was wrong before when I said there were no happily ever after’s in the darkness. There was, and this was ours.

“Promise me that no matter what you will always be my brother…” Steph’s voice was so quiet, it seemed like she was already gone. That was the last question that she asked me when I found her dying in the bathroom of our condo. I had no known reason for her death, it wasn’t

even ruled a murder, but a suicide. The police told me she wanted to die, but I knew my sister. And I knew they were wrong. “Grayson…” That voice… I knew that voice. “This wasn’t part of the plan, Drake. You were supposed to keep him alive!” The voice grew angrier, and I could feel a pair of cold hands against my skin. I kept replaying the sound of the person’s voice, hoping that a face would connect in my mind as I realized it was her hands on me. When it didn’t, I forced all my strength into opening my eyes. What stood before me had to be a vision I made up in my own self-conscious, maybe even a sick and twisted dream

because there was no possible way that Stephanie was still alive and standing before me. I had seen her die with my own two eyes, felt her heart beat stop with my very hands. “The deal was made with someone else. Not me. Now the cops are on the way, and you’re coming with us.” I could feel her hands shaking against my skin as Drake yelled right back at her. My eyes were heavy, but I managed to get one open, only for my heart to sink into my stomach. A woman that looked eerily similar to my sister was sitting on the ground in front of me, trying to undo the ropes that were around my feet. “H… Howwww?” The word was drawn out. I wanted to rub at my eyes to

make sure I wasn’t imagining this, but couldn’t. Instead I yanked against my bonds that had me secured tightly. “I made a deal, Grayson. They were going to kill you. They were going to take you from me.” Tears fell from her eyes and down onto her pink cheeks. She was really alive, here in the flesh, and I couldn’t even hold her. Every emotion known to mankind flowed through me. Relief and happiness, the same kind I felt when I found out Ellie was still alive came first. But anger that years had passed as I sat in my own grief over her death sat just below the surface, waiting to be released on the people that forced her into this. “Stop talking. It’s okay, just

undo me.” My gaze shifted from Stephanie to Ellie. One moment she was talking, and the next she wasn’t. Everything around us seemed to stop and go in slow motion. Stephanie scurried away from me just as bullets started to fly, another voice I knew all too well echoed throughout the building. “You fuckers better do one of two things; stand the fuck up and fight, or run the fuck away. I’m here to end it all!” Tuck’s voice bounced off the walls and met my ears. Drake’s eyes narrowed as he reached for his gun and then his knife. His eyes shifted from Ellie and then to me. “I knew I would never be the man she wanted, that I could live with.

What I can’t live with though, is her loving someone else.” Before I could understand what it was that he was going to do, he had his knife out, his fingers wrapped tightly around the handle. Air left my lungs as he lifted the blade sliding it across Ellie’s throat in one fluid motion. “NOOOOOOOO!!!!!” I screamed hysterically, fighting against the ropes. My heart was beating out of my chest as I watched blood drip down her throat, her head falling to the side as a gurgling sound filled the air. Pain seared through every fiber in my body. Rage like I had never felt consumed me.. Her eyes were closed, her chest heaving. I watched on in agony hoping that the

rise and fall in her chest would not halt. “It had to be that way. Now we can be happy.” Lifting the gun in his other hand, he placed it against his head. “Drop your weapons! Drop your weapons, or you leave me no choice!” A tall man with dark hair and caramel colored eyes screamed, his gun raised and aimed at Drake. But Drake did not listen, instead he looked me straight in the eyes and smiled, right before he pulled the trigger. Nothing. I felt nothing. My eyes moved from his body as it fell to the floor, blood and brain matter splattering against the cement as Tuck ran over to Ellie. “We’re losing her!!!” he yelled,

and I could feel myself fading. The best parts of me dying away as I watched the woman I loved more than anything fight for her life. Tuck untied her from the chair in a rush, lying her body down on the floor. “Untie me.” I looked at Stephanie and ordered. I was too angry, too hurt to think rationally. My emotions were fueling my actions; I was losing her all over again. Stephanie got me untied just as I saw her father trying to escape. There was no way. No fucking way I would allow him to be free in this world. Not after all he had done to her, after all I had fought for. No. I would end him in respect for her.

I no longer needed answers. I needed him dead. His blood covering my body. Grabbing the gun off the floor that Drake used to end his own life, I headed across the room just as Cole was cuffed. One monster was dead. The other could meet him in Hell. I watched as Ellie’s father turned and looked right at me before shutting the door behind him. My muscles burned and my head throbbed with every step I took towards him. As soon as I got to the door, I yanked it open.. “This is for her!” I yelled out, with no care at all that the S.W.A.T team had just

entered the building. He turned just in time to see the bullet flying at his head, causing satisfaction to fill my belly as the bullet ripped through his head and his body dropped instantly to the ground, a puddle of blood forming around his head. I moved towards him and stood above him, a vacant look was present in his eyes, and a look of shock was on his face. Cops swarmed us as I dropped the gun. I didn’t need them to order me to drop it, I knew what was coming next. My body was forced to the ground as my hands were pulled against my back, my wrists being secured by the cold metal of handcuffs. I smiled. I had achieved my

goal; I had fulfilled my promise to Ellie.

“Let’s play twenty questions,” Grayson said, shoving a chip into his mouth. We were supposed to be cuddling and watching movies, but ended up having a conversation about one another’s lives which lead to the fact that we knew very little about each other.

“Kay. What’s your favorite color?” I asked, going first. “Green,” he answered without even having to think, his eyes bleeding into mine. “Favorite animal?” He went next. I stared at him for a long moment before answering. “Giraffe.” “What did you want to be when you grew up?” I knew he had to actually sit and think on this one. I mean who could remember something like that right off the top of their head. “Fireman,” he answered without blinking. My jaw dropped opened at the mere thought of him as a fireman. Hello, let me burn down my

house right this second. “Have you always been in love with me?” he asked, but before I could respond my vision blurred then everything seemed to shift. “What?” I blinked. His body started to disappear right before my eyes, washing away like chalk on the sidewalk after it rained. “Come on, Ellie. Hold on, just a little bit longer.” Grayson’s voice was frantic, bringing me out of subconscious. Warmth covered my body as coldness sunk deep down into my bones. “We need you to step out, sir. We’re losing her again.” Another voice yelled over me.

Losing her? Who was her? And what was going on? I questioned, my heart beat rising. “I said, have you always been in love with me?” Grayson asked me again, but this time he wasn’t there. He wasn’t beside me. He was gone, and all I had left of him was his voice surrounding me. Sir, we won’t tell you again. Out now!” Someone screamed and it vibrated through me. My eyes snapped open and it was like I was having an outer body experience. There I laid in a hospital bed, doctors and nurses surrounding me. What were they doing? It was then that everything clicked into place.

They were trying to save my life, but with each ticking second, my life seemed to drift away faster. I was dying. There was no saving me.

Firstly I have to give thanks to the Brie over at CCBH for always being down to help with rewrites. She always helps me work out the kinks in the book, and makes it that

much better. If you ever wonder why you love a particular scene its probably because she made me put more emotion into it then I wanted. Then there is my entire marketing team better known as the pimpers. You guys work the hardest you can to get my books out into the author community and even if I don’t tell you every single day I am

beyond grateful that you do so. Thank you loves for spreading the word. Clayr, thank you for every tag and encouraging word. Betas: Thank you for telling me when something sucks and when something is worth loving. Amanda: You’re one tough PA. You deal with me on my moodiest days, and have learned what I love and what I

hate. Sometimes I think you have the worst job in the universe. Then I remember who your boss is. ;) Lee; keep being your sassy self Bloggers: Big or small, thank you for posting for me. I would be nothing without you, and lets face it my books wouldn’t reach anyone. Thank you for all you do. Readers; the glue that holds

us all together. You’re the reason there is bread and milk on my table, never forget that. Coffee, Pepsi, Peeps, and pregnancy hormones can be thanked for the reason this book is now done. I hope you all truly enjoy it, and thank you for reading. Xoxo

J.L. Beck is the best selling author of many series including: The Kingpin Love Affair Series, Bittersweet

Series, Worth It Series, Project Series, and Ties Series. She's best known for weaving a tale, that ends with your mouth hanging open, and your hands gripping the edge of your seat. She's a no holds bar author who enjoys spending time with her high school sweet heart of eight years, three year old hellion, and soon to be newborn son

Kolden, as well as Hatchi & Halo her two fur babies. She calls Wisconsin home, but loves to travel. In her free time you can catch her watching bad reality tv, cooking, reading books, or spending time outdoors. Follow her to see what wicked adventures she's up too...

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Read on for the first few chapters of Project: Killer and be on the look out for book two in the series Project: Rogue to release next month.

Prologue Killer It all started with a kiss. It wasn’t one of those sappy ass ones, where there is affection, and electricity flows through your body, and you just fucking know they’re the one for you. No this was a different kind of kiss. It wasn’t a spark, but a simple touch of

ones skin against another. I would like to think that somehow that simple gesture had triggered something into motion. Like that one kiss changed the world around us, tilting the perpetual axis. That somehow that one kiss had signified our entire being of life— it didn’t. That kiss meant nothing, and the feelings that formed from within because of

it meant nothing. Every time I thought of Maggie, the way her brown hair bellowed in the wind. The way her small hands clasped mine. It reminded me of the illness, the death that plagued me. It reminded me of the clock that slowly ticked inside of me. I was dying, and there was nothing that anyone could do. There was no cure, no miracle for someone like

me. After all, millions of people lost their loved ones, so what would one more loss be? What would me not dying, do for the world? Nothing. Eventually I would be replaced. The school would get a new student, the teachers would forget I ever existed and Maggie... Sweet little Maggie would move on, and find someone new. My parent’s would have another

child and life would be normal. Normal, for everyone but me. See, I wouldn’t get to live such a lavish life. No, the life I would live would make me wish that the cancer had killed me. That it had eaten away at everything that made me who I was. Why you ask? Simply because the person I was being morphed into, the man that they were

creating me to become was anything less than death. He was ruthless, angry, and hateful. He thought of no one but himself. He was careless, his needs only being met through sex, and violence. His memories would be wiped away, yet a small girl with red cheeks, and brown hair would still find her way into his dreams. He would grow to hate that little

girl for not being able to remember the memories of her, while driving himself insane wondering where she came from. He would eventually become one of the world’s best trained fighters. Genetically mutated to the government’s liking. Turned into something he never wanted— something he never should’ve been.

Now you see that his legacy, or the memories of whom he was would never be remembered simply because there was nothing to remember about a twelve year old boy that should be dead. No family, friends, or loved ones to care. He was a killer, and I am him.

Chapter One Maggie− The Past I hated when the other kids laughed at him. They would push and shove him, not even caring that he was sick. Sometimes, I wanted to push them back or scream at them to leave him alone. Except I knew no one would listen to me. They never did. Instead I sat in the

background waiting till the minute I could swoop in and care for him. He was taller than the other kids even at the age of sixteen, and just as cute. It didn’t matter to me that his skin was almost always ghostly white, and that he would much rather be wearing something that didn’t cling to his body instead of jeans because to me he was

perfect. “What’s a matter Diesel…? Maggie not make you your breakfast this morning.” Roger one of the biggest bullies of them all mocked Diesel. This was a normal occurrence on the bus. Every morning this same conversation would take place. I was starting to wonder when it would stop. Diesel ignored him like

always, and stared out the window. I watched from the seat across from him, as Roger sat behind him and shoved his knees into the back of his seat. Fury grew deep within me, raging like a burning fire. Oh how I hated what was going on. Diesel had told me many times that me sticking up for him just made things worse on him and

for me. That there was nothing like a girl sticking up for a boy. It was against the rules. Luckily for him and I, I didn’t play by the rules. One would say I was a rule breaker. “Knock it off Roger.” I murmured. Diesel’s steel blue eyes turned to mine shooting daggers at me. I could tell by that one single look that I had angered him. “Awe, what was

that you said Maggie? I couldn’t quite hear you, then again most of us never do.” He belittled me, laughing as his friends joined in the mockery. “Just leave her alone.” Diesel exclaimed giving them the satisfaction that they wanted. They wanted him to talk, to stick up for me — for anything. Simply because it showed that he had

a weakness for something… for someone. “You guys hear this? He wants us to leave Maggie alone.” Roger mocked some more, and I did whatever I could not to turn towards Diesel and take in his expression. You’re a weakness to him, they will use you to get to him. I repeated the same words over and over

again in my mind. I became momentarily distracted as I talked myself out of sticking up for him again. So much so, that I didn’t notice that Roger had slipped into my seat. I turned staring into his eyes, they were a deep brown that had most of the girls in the school falling at his feet. All except me. I knew the meanness that lingered just

under the surface. He was a monster in disguise. “Maggie…” He hissed, one of his fingers gripping a lock of my hair. A tingle of pain radiated through my scalp as a soft yelp left my lips. “Leave me alone Roger.” I kept my voice stern and strong not wanting him to think that his hair pulling had gotten the best of

me. “Leave you alone…?” He mocked, a sick smile forming on his face. If Roger wasn’t such a dog, one would consider him cute. He had that beautiful sandy brown hair, he was tall and played all kinds of sports. His parents could afford it unlike mine or Diesel’s. He was perfect in the eyes of everyone around us, and that’s what set

him apart. No one expected his behavior. “Roger, this is taking it a little far.” Diesel tried to hide the panic in his voice but you could tell that what Roger was doing was getting to him. It was times like these that even if he said that we weren’t friends— that a dying person couldn’t make friends with someone in such a short amount of time... I

knew that I meant something to him. “Does it bother you when I touch her Diesel? Are you jealous?” Roger taunted, his hand slipping onto my leg. I was wearing a skirt which was a bad wardrobe choice for the day. I swatted his hand away, only for him to bring it back and grip my thigh hard. “Let go of me.”

I growled, growing angrier with every passing second. Roger had never taken it this far. He had never touched me in a physical nature before. “Roger, let go of her.” There was a vengeance in Diesel’s eyes, and his voice was stronger than I had ever heard it. He moved to the edge of his seat and leaned over gripping Roger by the shoulder.

“Get your hand the hell off me crippled…” Roger rolled his shoulders, forcing Diesel’s hand to fall away. He lifted his hand forming a fist as if he was going to hit him. I knew I couldn’t allow that to happen, so I tried distracting him. I grabbed Rogers’s wrist prying his touch from my thigh as I watched him lower his raised fist.

“If you ever get done playing with the crippled boy… “ Roger gazed at Diesel out of the corner of his eye as if to send a warning, “You know where to find me.” He whispered the ending of his sentence into my ear causing my hair to stir. I could feel the heat from his breath against my skin and it made me skin itch. I wanted to sneer at him, tell him that I

would never give into him. That I would never be like one of the many girls that I went to school with. Instead I turned my attention to the window clenching my fists while counting to ten. Out of the corner of my eye I watched him watch me for a mere second, his eyes eating away at my body, then he slipped from my seat and into his

regular seat a ways back. I released the breath that I wasn’t even aware I was holding, and allowed fresh oxygen to filter into my lungs. Roger was a monster, the living breathing kind that your parents forgot to tell you about. The kind that had the power to make your life a living hell day in, and day out. And he did just that.

“I told you not to stick up for me.” Diesel’s voice was right next to me, and as I turned around to see where he was, I came face to face with him. His dark hair was long and slung back in a ponytail. He was looking at me with anger in his eyes, anger I had never seen in him before. A shudder ran through me, as I bit at my lip unsure of what I should say.

“Well, I told you that I wouldn’t let them pick on you anymore. They don’t know what they’re saying. They’re dumb.” They looked at Diesel as an outcast because he didn’t talk to others. But what they didn’t realize was him not talking to others had to do with the cancer that surged through his veins. They didn’t understand that in Diesel’s eyes there was

no point in making memories that he may not be here for tomorrow. “They know what they’re saying Maggie.” He scoffed, his attention going back towards the front of the bus as if to make it seem like he wasn’t paying an ounce of attention to me. “You always try to see the good in people, you always try to protect the weak. What

you don’t understand is, I don’t need protecting.” He turned back towards me his eyes boring into mine, willing me to understand what he was saying. The problem was I didn’t want to understand, I just wanted to help. I could feel emotions that I had never felt before finding their way to the surface. “You can’t save everything. You can’t save me.” He hissed

out. My gaze slid down to his clenched fists, and over his body which was built up tightly like a rubber band ready to snap, like a man built up with aggression. I understood his pain though. His anger was evident. I knew he didn’t want to be protected, and he didn’t want even one friend if there was a chance he would die, and there was. Every day since his diagnosis

was an extra day given. Friends meant that when you died you would leave someone behind. You would have a reason to feel guilty about your death. He didn’t want that. “I don’t want to save you Diesel.” I murmured staring deeply into his eyes. His attention shifted onto me, the look in his eyes reminding me of waves crashing against the

sand on the beach. “Yes, yes you do. You. The doctors. My parents. They all want to save me. Everyone wants me to live except myself.” There was so much agony in the words he was saying. It was as if he knew his fate, and that fighting it was inevitable. “That isn’t true —“My words cut off, as his hand landed against my knee

gripping it. He wasn’t hurting me, but he easily could. Even if he was sick, he still held strength behind his touch, and words. “It is true. Believe me when I say it’s true. I know what you all think. I know that you assume sticking up for me makes it better, maybe you even think that if you’re nice to me that when I die God will grant you

something special.” He was sneering now, his words forced out between his teeth. “That’s not the p —“My words were cut off again as he squeezed my knee. Pain radiated up my leg and I bit my lip to stifle the cry that wanted to escape my mouth. “I don’t want to hurt you Maggie. I don’t want to do anything to ruin you, but

whatever you think is going on between us isn’t. Whatever help you think you can offer me, you can’t. In the end you’re only going to hurt yourself, and bring more attention to me. Attention that I have no need to seek.” My mind was blank. Like a chalkboard that had been wiped clean. I had nothing to say, at least nothing that would be worth

saying. He didn’t care. He didn’t want support, and even though it broke my heart to see others beat him with their words and hands there was nothing that I could do to save someone who didn’t want to be saved. He was right… I was putting my nose somewhere that it wasn’t needed. I had been for the past six months now. Since the day his parents came out and told everyone

that he had been battling cancer the last four years. We all knew that there was something going on, he was missing school all the time, losing weight, and his demeanor had taken a major hit. He hated everyone, and everything. “Do you understand me?” He asked softly. His voice caressed my body in a blanket of warmth.

He didn’t realize the good that he could produce, the good that he had the chance to bestow upon others. I nodded my head, willing the tears that were on the verge of slipping from my eyes away. Be strong. Give him what he wants. “Good.” He said satisfied with the conversation. His hand slipped from my knee, as I

had to force myself not to rub the pain out of it. The rest of the bus ride consisted of me sitting in the far corner of my seat staring out the window pretending that his body heat wasn’t what I was feeling next to me. Forcing myself to not lash out and say something to him. Something that would only push him further away from me.

As we pulled up to the school and the bus stopped, my heart felt as if it was going to beat out of my chest. He hadn’t said another word to me, and even as he looked at me now I knew he wouldn’t. At least not after this conversation. The words he had said to me would be the last he would ever speak to me unless I provoked him. “Remember

what I said Maggie.” His voice was a whisper in the wind as he got out of the seat and pushed into the line to get off the bus. I couldn’t force myself to move, it was as if I had lost all control of my body. Eventually I found my bearings and slipped into the back of the line my mind drifting to Diesel’s words. I can’t be

saved… Maybe he didn’t think he could be saved. Maybe he didn’t think he was worth it, but I did. I saw it when I looked into his eyes. I felt it whenever he would touch me and somewhere in the depths of his soul, even though he was telling me he couldn’t be saved… in his soul he was screaming for someone to save him.

Diesel was worth saving, he just didn’t know it yet.

Chapter Two Maggie— Present “Maggie.” I could hear my name being called from across the room, but I still failed to acknowledge the voice that was saying it. Either that or I didn’t care to acknowledge it.

I would go with the latter of the two. “Maggie open your fucking ears. I need that paperwork on my desk ASAP!” The voice yelled out again, their footsteps growing closer until they stopped in front of my desk. Oh I knew that voice. It was the one that belonged to my boss’s son. The same son that had caused me great pain in my younger

years. He hadn’t changed not one bit, unless you considered growing into a bigger dickwad than he previously was. He was still a fucking bully, a piece of shit asshole that felt like he controlled everything— including me. “Okay.” I finally said, hoping my one word response would get him to leave my desk. To say I hated my job was a fucking

understatement. A huge one at that. I more than hated it. If it weren’t a means to income, or a way to answers that I desperately wanted I would’ve cut ties with the place years ago. I couldn’t though. I needed the money, and I wanted answers almost more than I wanted my next breath. I never wanted to work for PGI Corp, but they were one of the biggest

growing companies in our town, and they were offering jobs to anyone willing to work. Plus, I had an inspiration for coming into this shit hole every day. I had a memory, a piece of my heart that forced me to work here. Someone long ago told me they didn’t need saving, and since that day I told myself I would do whatever I could to come up with a cure. That

would be the one person to push my efforts, so that no one would have to go through death, and loss ever again. “Okay? That’s all you’re going to fucking say?” Roger was the only one that could actually get away with swearing in the office. He said “fuck” like it was going out of style. His vocabulary included more swear words than it did regular words.

“Yes okay. As in I will have the papers to you as soon as I can get online.” My voice was monotone as it always was. I would never give him the satisfaction of knowing every word that came from his mouth made me want to barf into the nearest trash can. “Good, because I have something else for you to do when you bring the

papers in.” He wiggled his eyebrows at me as he leaned over my desk and into my personal space. Remember why you’re doing this Maggie. Remember. I had to tell myself this every day, at least three times daily. It was the only thing that stopped me from running for the hills, from running out of this place and never turning the fuck around. “Great.” I

whispered to myself, turning on my computer as he walked away. I watched the screen light up as my thoughts drifted to my family and everything they had done for me. My parents had paid for my college tuition, I was more than grateful since they didn’t have much. My father held a good job, but the way the world was now a days made going to college almost

impossible. Only the richest, or smartest people were accepted into schools. The fact that I was wasting a degree in Pharmaceutical Studies by working for someone like Roger, didn’t sit well with them. They wanted to see me do something with my life, working a desk job wasn’t bettering the community or my own life. As my computer

booted up, I watched Kandace a couple desks down from me flirting with one of the new hires. I smiled deeply, at her ballsy attitude. She had balls, hell I think she had bigger balls than most of the men that worked in this place. Her eyes met mine as I watched her work her moves. She was a natural flirt, a social butterfly most would say. She batted her

eyelashes and flashed him a smile before stepping away from his desk and sashaying her way over to me. “You’re still taking orders from that ass hat in a suit…” Kandace giggled softly, setting her ass against my desk. “If you mean the ass hat that’s my boss, then yes of course I’m listening to him.” I typed my

password into the computer, and waited for my email to load. “A couple of people from the office and I are headed into the city tonight. We’re going to hit up one of those new clubs on the strip.” She added innocently. I knew where she was going with this. She had been bitching more than usual about my lack of being a wing

woman. The thing was, I just wasn’t feeling it. Dating wasn’t my thing, and sitting at a bar drinking away my sorrows wasn’t either. I would much rather be at home in my sweats reading a book and drinking a glass of wine… “I know what you’re getting at Kandace and the answer is the same as it was last week.” She frowned, a pout showing on

her face. “You always say that. You always say you would rather have your nose stuck in a book, but since you never go out how would you know what is fun and isn’t?” She was questioning me, attempting to find a flaw in my excuse. Anything to get me to leave the confines of my home. “Very funny

Kandace, but I know your methods of persuasion and being that I don’t swing that way it’s not going to work...” Her pout turned into a cheesy smile. “Well I tried. Doesn’t matter anyway, you’re coming out tonight even if I have to come to your house and get you myself.” She glared at me, and it was in that glare that I knew she was

serious. Fuck. She wasn’t kidding she would come and get me. I pondered on the actual thought of going out for a moment as I skimmed the emails in my inbox. “We’ll see Kandace, there isn’t any guarantee though.” “There is always a guarantee with Kandace. I’ll

see you at eight whore.” Then she was up, and walking back to her own desk, and I was staring at an email that had just popped into my inbox from Roger. I printed off the documents he wanted ”ASAP”, and headed to the printer to pick them up before swinging by his office. On my walk to the printer my mind drifted to Roger, and this

company that I was working for. It was obvious that Roger would turn into his father one day. Roger’s father was a filthy rich man, hell bent on owning everyone and everything in this town. I knew the kind of person Roger was, and honestly, I couldn’t see such a mean and evil person running a company that went out of the way to find cures for cancer. It was a complete

and utter contradiction. His family, running, and owning a company that cared for others loved ones was just against everything that I knew Roger for being. I pushed all the horrible thoughts to the back of my mind as I focused in on Roger’s door. I stared at it blankly for a moment before knocking on it softly and waiting for him to say come

in. You never walked into Roger’s office unannounced. I remember the last assistant he had ended up getting fired, and escorted out on the spot. He was very secretive about his work. Whatever went on in his office was his business, and his business alone. “Come in.” His voice was deep, and as I pushed the door open and

walked into the room I could see the entire city before me. He had the best view in the building. One that looked out into the robust city. I focused on the view, knowing very well that his eyes were glued to my every movement. I could feel his gaze penetrating every orifice of my body. “I see you’re doing much better at following orders today.” He smiled, but

it wasn’t genuine. It was as fake as Tammy’s tits in Office C. Who was Tammy you ask? Oh his most recent fuck. The newest intern in the building, and the most open about her friends with benefits relationship with Roger. “Here’s your paper work that you asked for.” I dismissed his comment, not wanting to engage in a ridiculous conversation about

something I could care less about. Instead I turned on my heels to leave, only to be stopped when I heard his throat clear behind me. I wanted to turn around and lash out, to make him understand that what he said to me meant nothing. “Maggie…” Every time he said my name it caused my stomach to revolt. He was just as sinister now as

he was in High School. “Yes.” I said between clenched teeth, my face turned away from him. I hadn’t ever truly hated anyone in my entire life, but Roger was the exception. If he was dying in a burning building I would sit and watch. Maybe even bring stuff to make smores. “We all know why you took a job here. It’s not as if you truly

care for the company, but more so what it can do for you.” I took in a deep breath, the room seemly growing smaller as air filled my lungs only to be released like a deflated balloon a moment later. Breathe. Deep breaths. “That…” Was that true? I had never admitted to such a thing. Sweat formed on my palms. I hated feeling as if I was trapped without an

escape route. “Don’t even say it’s not true when we both know that it is. You took this job for that fucking crippled kid.” Crippled kid… Don’t make him eat his words. Kill him with kindness. ”He had a name.” I forced the words from my mouth. I didn’t want to talk about him. His death wasn’t fair to anyone,

not his family, me, or him. “Whatever, his name doesn’t matter. Not anymore at least. What does is the fact that you took a job working for me, yet it seems as if you would much rather not be here most days?” I could hear his foot steps across the marble flooring, my heart beat rising with every step. “I love my job…” I lied, trying

not to stutter over my words. I hated my job, but I hated Roger and what he reminded me of more. Hurt. Pain. A deep robust laugh filled the room, “That is the biggest fucking lie I have ever heard.” His hot breath was on the back of my neck. I should’ve turned around, I should’ve told him to leave me alone. “Fine. I’m here

for him, and one day I will be on the team that helps find a cure for the cancer that he had. He wasn’t just crippled Roger. He was sick. He was dying.” I smarted off, openly admitting my faults as I turned around to face him not realizing how close he truly was to me. I took a wobbly step back wanting to separate us, my legs feeling like jelly. Roger’s hand

reached out and gripped my chin hard, pulling my face into his. There was a sick fire in his eyes, one that said he would hurt me if he had too. Men like him weren’t afraid of someone like me getting in there way. “You think that you have everyone fooled. That no one will discover you for what you really are.” He was seething.

What was he talking about? I hadn’t ever tried to dissect what Roger had to say simply because he was wrong most, if not all the time. His motives were always to protect his empire, or to make others suffer. He was out to benefit no one but himself. “I have no one fooled.” I gritted out, the hold he had on my jaw growing

tighter. I winced, as his fingers dug deeper into my skin. His face leaned into mine as his eyes lingered on my lips before raising to my own. He wanted to kiss me. I knew it, I felt it in his stare, and his touch. He wanted me, but he knew he could never have me. No one could, because I was taken. Even with him no longer here, he still lived and breathed in me… in my heart,

and I would not betray him with his enemy. “Your right… You have no one fooled simply because they can see through your ulterior motives. Watch your back Maggie, you might find more than just a knife in it.” He released me, shoving me away from him. His threat lingering in my mind long after I had got my footing and walked out of his office.

Rubbing at my jaw, I attempted to not draw attention to myself. That would only make it worse. Instead I went to my desk and kept myself busy, looking at various articles about Diesel’s cancer. He had a rare brain tumor, stage four at the time of his death. It was inoperable, meaning there was nothing that they could do to save him. They had given him

months to live, which turned into years. Many said it was a miracle that he had held on for as long as he did. I felt that there was always something else lingering under the surface. A hidden reasoning, or answer. My fingers pounded on the keys for hours, doing my research as I did every day. This wasn’t my job, I was to shuffle papers in

and out of Roger;s office. I was basically his assistant without the title or pay raise. My plan was to get into the labs and out of the office. There was nothing here for me, and having been here for six months I hadn’t discovered much of anything. PGI’s database was locked down tighter than Fort Knox. Codes were needed for just about everything and I wasn’t so

desperate for answers that I would sleep with someone, or lie, and cheat to get them. I had to do this the right way. “Maggie.” Kandace said in a motherly tone. I looked up from my keyboard giving her a look that said I’m working, go away. “Kandace.” “I saw you come out of Roger’s office earlier. Is everything okay?”

Kandace had always been concerned with my relationship with Roger. He bullied me in school, and just when I thought I would be able to get away from him here I was working under him. “Yeah, just typical shit that he puts me through. I can never just go into his office and give him his daily spreadsheets.” I kept my voice hushed. There were

office rats all around us. People that would turn around and tell him anything, and everything that took place out on the floor. They thought it would gain them more money, or freedom. Some did it just because they wanted too. “You were rubbing at your face when you came out. Don’t lie to me and tell me it’s nothing Maggie. If he’s fucking with you again

then I will find out, and do something about it.” I smiled to myself. God, how I had been blessed with such a great friend. Someone that would kick any and every one’s ass if I asked her too. “It’s nothing. At least nothing different than the norm. You know why I’m here Kandace. I want to get into the labs and see what kind

of cures, and drugs they’re coming up with.” I whispered to her, my eyes scanning the room. One would think moving up in the company would be something relatively normal. Something that could easily be talked about in the work place. Except it wasn’t. At least not here. Moving up to a new position was never something that was openly discussed, if you moved up

you just simply disappeared. Any promotion in the company was top secret. If you ever made it out of this sector of the building then you knew something that no one else did. I had to make it happen. I had to find out what was going on. If not for the families that were suffering with death, grief, and loss, then for Diesel. “It’s been seven

years. Seven years Maggie. It’s time to move on. It’s time to let it go. He died. He’s not coming back, and if you keep thinking like you are, it’s going to get you killed.” Kandace’s concern was cute, but completely unneeded. I had it all under control. Maybe if I kept telling myself that it would start to feel that way. “He might be

dead, but I made him a promise. I told him that I would try and help find a cure for his cancer. I wasn’t lying to him seven years ago, and I’m not going back on my word now. I understand your concerns, but I’m not doing anything wrong.” The look of shock on her face astounded me. Did she really feel as if what I was doing was wrong?

That wanting to stand by my word was wrong? “Davis.” Roger’s angry voice met our ears. Everyone turned to see what the issue was, including myself. “Sir…” Davis stumbled over his words, as he got into a standing position pushing from his desk as if he had just been told to jump. What the fuck is going on?

“Why don’t you tell the rest of the staff what happens when you try and make a fool of this company? Of the company my father spent years building from the ground up.” There was a glint of something I had never seen in Roger’s eyes. A need for blood—for death. “Sir… Can we talk about—“Davis tried adding, but it did no good.

Roger waved in security as his hand landed on Davis’ shoulder. “No we cannot talk about this. Once it’s found out that you’re here for yourself and not the company, then it becomes a problem. You made us believe you had the company’s best interest at heart, but you didn’t. So, that means you lied and I don’t do well with liars. We’re a team

Davis, but you aren’t a team player. If we all did whatever we wanted, for whatever reason this company wouldn’t be what it is. Let alone even exist.” “I promise it won’t happen again…” Davis pleaded. Sweat beading on his forehead as he clasped his hands together. “I know it won’t Davis, and neither will any of

these people make the same mistake as you. Listen up, this is what happens to you when you disobey this company. When you think that you can use it for your own benefits.” Every word that came out of Roger’s mouth was spat directly at me. His eyes drilled into mine as the guards came in pulling Davis from the room as if he never meant a damn thing to them.

With a smile Roger walked away… His eyes, and threat still ringing in my ears. For once it was starting to hit me. The good of doing this might not outweigh the bad. Kandace was right. I could very well be signing my own death certificate. BUY IT HERE:

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Read on for the first few chapters of Worth the Chase

Worth The Chase Book 1 of The Worth It Series

By Best Selling Author J.L. Beck

Chapter One - Gia Chapter One Gia I remember the very first time I laid eyes on him. My eyes lingered against his hard body, across his broad shoulders, and finally up to his handsome face. He had a body made for gripping, his abs were lick worthy and on full display for the entire female population of Auburn University, and believe me they were all looking. His eyes were a gun metal blue. Dark, and full of pent up energy ready to be unleashed on anyone who

got in his way. His chin was covered lightly with a dusting of stubble, his nose straight, his teeth white and his hair had that just screwed sway to it. He looked like a GQ model. It was no wonder everyone including myself lusted after him. “Gia. Focus on this shit in front of you. I’m here to tutor you, not have you check out my brother.” Chance, Chase’s twin brother scolded me. My cheeks warmed in embarrassment as I brought my eyes back down to my notebook and away from Chase and the blonde that was stuck against him like glue. The sun was shining through the trees and down onto us, as the

summer temps continued to rise. We were laying out on the front lawn of the campus, working on Advanced Biology. I needed to be focusing on cell splitting and not removing my panties and allowing that asshole access to my… “Gia?” Chance said my name again pulling me from my thoughts. At least I wasn’t being yelled at for staring at his brother this time. “What?” I answered, lifting my face to meet his angry stare. Chance was gorgeous too, I mean after all they were twins. He had the same body as his brother, except his eyes were green and he had a softness to him that Chase didn’t exhibit. Oh and let’s not forget, you could actually look at

him without him being an asshole solely because you glanced at him. He wasn’t full of himself like his other half. “You need to focus. It doesn’t matter if you’re not looking at him I can tell that you’re thinking about him which is the same fucking thing.” Chance’s voice was full of frustration. My mouth started to gape open all on its own. Shocked that Chance had come out about it so meanly, I closed my Bio book and grabbed my notebook. I didn’t know what to say. It was impossible to concentrate with Chase around. Attempting to “focus” with him around was like elementary school all over

again. The only difference being I was a senior at college this time around, and needed to get my shit together so I could graduate with a degree that mattered. I had fought for my chance to go to college, I had begged and pleaded for a chance at this life and I needed to stay on track. Even if being off track sounded so much more fun at this point and time. “Focusing would be easier if he wasn’t everywhere you were..” I growled, narrowing my eyes on him. It wasn’t Chance’s fault that he had to bring Chase all over the place like he was a toddler. Chase just had a habit of causing problems, and Chance

had a habit of making sure he stayed out of trouble. “I see you’re finally done with the princess.” Chase butted in as he walked up, the blonde missing from his arm as I picked myself up off the grass. His voice was all gruff, his posture confident as if he was telling everyone I’m better than you. Shaking my head, I raised an eyebrow at Chance showing him that this is exactly what I meant when I said it was hard to focus. My temper always flared when he came around, and before I could stop myself I was speaking. “You know my name is Gia. Use it, or don’t refer to me at all.” I sneered. He was gorgeous, and a

delectable specimen but the second he opened his mouth I wanted to stab him in the eye with a fork. I did want him though, that I can’t deny but I wanted him for one thing, and one thing only. I wanted to know if he was just as good in bed as the rest of the girls on campus said he was. Aside from that I didn’t want to listen to him speak once. He tilted his head sideways at me, “Wow. I just heard Chance have to remind you not to stare. Seems someone was a bit distracted.” He mocked with a smile on his lips, one that kind of made me go weak in the knees, but at the same time made me want to throat punch him. Of course he

would change the subject. He was good at dismissing the things he didn’t want to hear, or that didn’t work in his favor. If he thought I was going to play into his hand, he was wrong. I turned on my heel away from him fully intent on heading back to my dorm. I had to be moved out in a month for fall classes which meant that I would be on the womanhunt for a new apartment with my best friend, Taylor who would be a freshmen this year. “Wait… We need to meet up and go over the lab tests that you’ll be tested on this year one last time.” Chance’s voice stopped me from walking away which caused me to turn back around, and face Chase who was

now wearing a shit eating grin. Hate him for all that he’s worth, I told myself. Don’t look at him like a piece of cake that you want to devour. No, look at him like he’s the reason you need to work off fifteen hundred more calories. He’s the cake. Don’t touch the cake. Don’t think about the cake. I swallowed the saliva that had started to form in my mouth just as a caught a glimpse of Chase smiling again out the corner of my eye. A dribble of sweat dripped down his abs, and my mouth popped wide open. What were we talking about? “Let’s meet up this weekend. Chase is having a party off

campus, but maybe you can come over anyways and we can work on it?” Chance asked for what I assumed the second time, his eyebrow raised in questioning. I bite my lip and nodded my head yes. I was going to have major whiplash after today’s meeting. I knew there was no way that I could handle going over to Chase and Chance’s house, apartment, mansion or whatever the hell they lived in to study. I would have to cancel. “Alright, we’ll talk then. I’ll text you the time.” Chance responded as he bent down to pick up his books and papers, placing them in his bag. I gave Chase one more once

over and then walked away, wondering what the fuck it was that I was doing. I had no reason to be lusting after someone like him. He was as far from the safe zone as it got. His demeanor alone caused my heartbeat to go into overdrive and my body to feel alive, as if I hadn’t been truly living this whole time. I knew better than to associate myself with him, he had bad written all over him. For God’s sake my father was an FBI Agent! If he heard half the shit that I did away from home he would probably force me to move back home and finish my last year of college being locked away in my childhood room. Coming to a halt and squeezing my

eyes shut, I took in a breath. Ugh, Gia just calm your tits. He will never find out, there is absolutely nothing to worry about. I told myself as I opened my eyes and continued my walk across the campus. I was just about where I needed to be when my phone started ringing extremely fucking loud. “Fuck.” I huffed, struggling to pull the slim device from the pocket of my shorts. Taylor’s name showed across the screen, and excitement filled my belly as I pressed the answer key. “I’m so excited to see you!” She squealed into the phone. This was her first year of college, a time where growing was something that she would truly experience. I was glad that

I would be that one true friend here for her when she needed it the most. I didn’t have that my first year, hell I barely had that now, but in a few weeks we both would have something we’ve been missing since I left for college. “I’m pretty sure, that I’m way more excited. I have to start packing up my stuff at the dorm this week.” I confessed. I hated packing, anything that involved moving was something that I was against. “Oh speaking of, I found a condo for rent. I’m going to call the number on Craigslist first thing Monday. Hopefully we can rent it. Its close to campus, and they’re offering the lower rooms in the basement. Two

bedrooms with spacious closets, one bathroom, and our own laundry room. We’ll have to share the kitchen and living room with them though.” A smile formed on my face, as I crossed the grass to my dorm room. I slid my key into the lock gaining access into the building as Taylor filled me in. “You’ve sure done your research. That sounds amazing, the only issue is price.” I hated to be the bearer of bad news but I wanted to be realistic. “They only want eight hundred a month.” She sounded just as shocked as I felt, so much so that I almost tripped walking up the first flight of stairs.

“Well shit. Then it’s a given, as long as everything checks out and they aren’t some serial killers then of course we’ll take it.” My voice bounced off the empty hall walls as I jogged up another flight of stairs keeping my eyes focused on every step as to make sure I didn’t actually trip. “Yes, you bet your ass we will. I have to go though, but we’ll talk later..” I could hear her moving around her bedroom, and the low speaking of a male voice calling her name. “Okay…” I said saddened that our conversation had to end so soon. It had been three horrible, long years in time that we were separated. Now we would finally be together doing

what college kids did all across the country, but together as best friends should. “Sorry, Dad wants to take me out to dinner. I’ll text you when I get home. Love you, bye.” “Okay, love you too. Bye Tay.” I pulled my phone away from my face just as I made it to my room. 208. I sighed into the air. There was no one here, no one to talk to, and no one to do anything with. I realized that the highlight of my day had already come and gone as I threw myself onto my bed. Now I was free to do nothing to rest of the afternoon. Sigh. College life

Chapter Two Chase Chapter Two Chase Gia King would be my damnation. We failed to see eye to eye, even on the same air we breathed. She could say the sky was blue and I would disagree just to see her scrunch her nose up at me. I loved that she hated me, even more so it made my cock harder than steel to see the anger in her eyes, the hate in her blood fighting to be unleashed against me.

She was the only thing worth touching on this campus, yet I told myself that keeping my distance was the right thing to do, and damn if it was. I needed to be leveled headed when I was around her, otherwise we would head down a path that neither of us could come back from. I knew it and I was sure she knew it. Therefore, I drew that boundary in the sand, making sure neither of us crossed it. No matter how much I wanted to, and now-a-days I wanted to a lot. I had to tell myself no as she walked away, as I headed home, and as I forced her from my mind. The days since I had last seen her passed in a flurry, between the gym, girls wanting

to catch a chance with me and getting ready for the party I failed to remember what day it was. Then she showed up in a pair of jean shorts that were ten times too short, and a shirt, if you could even call it that since it showed her belly on my doorstep looking for my brother. Of course I was shirtless, with my baseball cap on backwards. I had three parts whiskey, one part coke in my Red Solo cup and I was two sheets to the wind having been drinking all afternoon. She looked like a temptation I could no longer resist. “Where is your brother?” She asked, her voice was full of energy which told drunk Chase she was a

challenge, something that needed to be broken. Sober Chase would’ve declined knowing that there was a boundary that needed to stay in place, but sober Chase was long gone. “Around…” I gestured to the whole area. It wasn’t a lie. He was around, I just wasn’t sure where ‘around’ was. Her eyes flickered to the room behind me, to the people I had invited who were too busy drinking and talking to notice us at the door, before moving back up to my face. They were a beautiful mix of blue and green, like the ocean when the sun filtered through it. “Well we made plans to meet up today to study at this time, but it’s evident that none of that is taking

place here.” She tried to hide the anger in her voice, and even portrayed herself as cool, calm, and collected. It didn’t work though, I knew better. In fact I had grown to know her better in the last few months, since Chance started tutoring her. “Well those plans have been shot to hell. Don’t cha’ think? I mean, I kind of figured that you wouldn’t even show.” I paused wondering if that was a dick thing to have said, then again I was always a dick so this wasn’t anything new. She rolled her eyes, and by God did my cock grow ever harder. She had an angry streak that I wanted to control. Her emotions were clearly

written on her face, and I wanted to reign them in. Take every part of her and taste her, lap her up until she was nothing but mine. “Clearly, I’m failing to see what your brother tutoring me has anything to do with you.” Her tone was defiant, and that was the one thing that pulled me from my thoughts. I leaned into her body, her smell overwhelming me. She smelt like vanilla beans, her skin was covered in a dark tan, almost a hazelnut color and her hair was black as night. God, I wanted to wrap my fist around her locks and pull on them as I dro– “I’m just going to find him.” She shoved past me, interrupting

my thoughts as her shoulder slammed into mine. It was with that friction that I felt electricity flow between the two of us. A mutual understanding, which made me wonder if fucking her would get her out of my system at all. Could you even fuck someone from your conscious? I didn’t know but I wanted to try. “Wait!” I yelled, causing her to come to a halt mid-step. Her body language turned stiff as I circled around her like a shark stalking its prey, only stopping once I came face to face with her. “Who do you think you are? You didn’t even ask to come in.” I spoke, my voice deep. It was my turn to

be angry and defiant. Afterall, she had shoved right past me, in my own home, showing anyone who was paying attention to us that she clearly thought lower than the dirt beneath her shoes of me. She stared at me like a doe caught in the headlights as she let what I said sink in, and once it did she went from innocent to red hot in one second flat. “You don’t talk to me like that…” Without hesitation she poked me directly in the chest her fingertip making a connection with my skin. I could practically feel the heat from her flesh imprinting itself on my soul. Anger shot through me, and in no time I

had my hand wrapped around her wrist, pulling her hand away from me. “Did I touch you? Have I violated your space?” I tilted my head at her, my mind growing dark at the things that I wanted to do to her. She took a step back, a sliver of fear filling her eyes as she did. “No, but you have pissed me off in the most epic way, so do me a favor…” She leaned into my face, her eyes drifting down to my lips, as if she was thinking the same thing I was, before coming back up to my eyes, “Leave me the fuck alone.” She pulled herself from my hold, and walked away, this time making certain she didn’t touch me. My

teeth began to grind against each other, the grip on my cup hard as I could hear the cracking of the cup. Liquid poured out the side but I didn’t care. I couldn’t take my eyes off her swaying body as she made her way through my house, disappearing into the crowd. Instead of chasing after her like she expected me too I stood there. Anger washing over me in waves. Gia King, had another motherfucking thing coming if she thought she could own me. Chase was never owned, it was always him doing the owning. I slammed the remaining liquid in my cup back, allowing the burn of the whiskey to cover my deep rooted emotions for her. Then I made my way

back into the kitchen to get a new cup and fill up. I needed to remove this chick from my life, and most importantly from my mind. That’s what I kept telling myself, but in all honesty she had weaved her way in so deep I was afraid she would never come out. *** Three hours and one entire bottle of whiskey later I found myself in an intense game of Beer Pong, my attention focused on winning, even though I wasn’t. I hadn’t had one thought about Gia, or whatever the fuck it was that she was doing, well up until now. I knew her and Chance had been studying upstairs, I also knew the

moment they were done because they both came down and I could hear Chance telling her to stay for a while as he made her a drink in the kitchen. Other than that I didn’t know what she had been doing, nor did I care, or at least that’s the story I was sticking to… Then she walked back in and my mind grew hazy. “You going to throw the ball, C?” Chance asked as he walked in behind her, an arrogant smile showing on his face. I shot him a grin as he maneuvered himself past the group of people that had formed in the kitchen and leaned against the table, watching my next move. Throwing the small yellow ball

into one of the cups on the far side of the table, I could do nothing but smile at the fact that I had made it. Was Gia my lucky charm? “Of-fucking-course.” My words were slurred just slightly. My blood craved her, my mind wanted to explore her, and my cock had never wanted to sink into someone as much as it did right this second. I walked away from the table without even thinking, my feet carrying me to her. “What the fuck Chase?” I could hear my partner Trenton bitching but I ignored his complaint. “You’re still here?” I whispered into her hair, coming up right behind her. I was barely able to

keep my body off of hers but I did, knowing that if I touched her I could make her uncomfortable, and for some reason that didn’t sit right with me. “Oh, and you’re still a jackass…” Her breath came in fast as she turned around realizing just how close we really were. Two inches was separating our lips from touching. A zing coursed through me as I could feel the energy between us sizzle, like the sun beating against the ground on a hot day. “Am I?” I asked proudly. “Get away from me.” She shoved against my shoulder as if she wanted me to move. Instead of doing as she asked I remained in my place,

seeing the look in her eyes as she stared at me with desires that only I could understand. “Is that what you really want? Me to walk away, to turn a blind eye to the fact that you want me to fuck you right here, and right now. You’ve been driving me crazy for months. That sweet ass temper of yours setting fire to my veins.” Had I just admitted that, even worse had I admitted it out loud? She stared at me openly, as if she wasn’t sure what to say. Her eyes gave way to the real emotions that she was feeling. Didn’t she realize the power that she held over me? When it came to her there was no limit. “It is.” She finally said.

Fury engulfed me. “Don’t lie to me. Lie to them.” I pointed out to the crowd. “Lie to my brother. Lie to your friends. Lie to whoever the fuck you want, but never lie to me.” I pushed my chest into hers. I was vibrating with anger. How could she lie, when her feelings had been there for months. They damn near mirrored my own, and there was no way in hell I was going to let her get away with walking away from me this time. “What I feel for you is nothing but lust, nothing but a desire for our bodies to become one.” She paused, a heavy sigh falling from her plump lips. “Yet, I know that crossing over into that threshold could be the

very end of us. See we’re already on the verge of burning everything down, if we did, if we became one, even if it was for one night, it could have the power to destroy everything. Us. Your brother. So let me ask you…” She leaned in closing the distance between our lips, her next words causing her bottom lip to brush against mine. “Is that what you want?” This time she was questioning me, and I knew my answer even if it was the one that I shouldn’t be saying. “Yes it is, because it’s the honest truth. It’s the one thing that I should say no to, but that I can’t, so yes... my answer is yes, and it always will be.” I wasn’t going to give her a

chance to say anything, because I knew if she did I wouldn’t do what I was about to do. Slanting my face down towards her, I leaned into her, her scent once again overwhelming me. My lips fell against hers softly at first and then deeper, until I felt nothing but the sweet, smooth, fullness of her mouth pressed against my own. Her lips moved back against mine, as her walls began to crumble. I could feel the heat under my skin wanting to unravel her, to strip her bare and claim her as mine, even if it was only for one night. I wanted to devour her in the darkest ways possible. Her hands small, but firm found there way onto my shoulders and

then wove together wrapping around my neck. The cup in my hand dropped to the floor as I gripped her underneath her ass and placed her upon the counter. “You’re mine, even if it’s just for tonight.” The growl of words could barely be heard as I descended on her again. Her taste filled me, reminding me of cherries and lemons, and as we mingled together, our lips saying the words we never could, I knew there was no going back. She would be mine. Her pussy would clench around my cock, and my dreams of one night with Gia King would forever be met. “Come upstairs with me?”

I had to ask, pulling away to make sure this is what she wanted. I couldn’t take her kiss for an okay, even if I wanted her more than I had wanted anything else. I had told myself that if I ever got a chance to touch her, that I would make it worth my while. I would treat her different, better than the other girls, simply because she was. I stared deeply into her eyes, watching as lust filled them, and a range of emotions filtered through. She bit her lip hard, nodding her head yes. I knew we both had been drinking, that we both had been angry but none of that mattered now. No. All that mattered was that I was about to

fulfil her darkest desires. I was going to show her just who Chase was. Grabbing her hand, and pulling her from the counter I guided us towards the stairs. She was mine…

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